Beyond Fiction
by Jeannaly
Summary: KAKASHIxOC! Imagine that you land in the World of Naruto. How would you cope with the fact that you're stuck with your favourite character, Kakashi? YAY! May contain some M material *nosebleed* he he! COMPLETED! T.T
1. Prelude

**Prelude**

This story is my story, which I want to share with you. It may seem unbelievable or unrealistic, but the fact is I lived it.

It's incredible what our mind can do with imagination. By a mere thought you can dream of a world that never existed, a world where you'd prefer to live than reality itself. Truth is I live in my imagination and I hate the real world.

The outside world scares me; my body drags me day by day to my daily activities, such as going to School. Otherwise I feel like a shell, it's as if my body was controlling me and my real self is hidden deep inside. I'm constantly walking in a trance, seeing through my eyes, but my personality is fake. Living in the reality can be so harsh, that sometimes you want to end it, by taking your life. Luckily I'm not that desperate, I have friends and a good family situation. I'm happy when I should be and sad when I should be, there's nothing wrong with me, it's just I feel like it's not me living.

Like all teenagers I'm moody, have conflicts or create them, but I never ever start conflict in School. I'm way too shy, serious and sometimes hyper sensitive, but when I'm home I'm a hell of a character. I'm loud; I argue and laugh like mad. I just wish to have that character instead of the other shy, serious Sarah.

However there is a point that bugs me the most, is the boyfriend stuff, "Oh did you see my boyfriend, he's so handsome!" or "You don't have a boyfriend, why, why?" Oh, can't they not shut up for once! It's my problem if I'm not interested, because I've only met the worst ones. They left a strong impression on me, a rather negative one so I rather stick with my friends and my siblings, then fish a random guy from a bar. Truthfully I'm waiting for the ideal person.

I measure 1m74 tall and slender, with aqua blue eyes and shoulder length wavy blond hair and pale skin. I'm the type of person who prefers to be natural, so I don't bother using make-up.

In my life I felt a lot of pain, sometimes unbearable agony and I nurtured myself on it. Nobody knows who I really am and nobody even wants to know. Although I have loving and caring parents and siblings, they still don't bother wondering about it. Dwelling inside me is a third yet invisible personality, a personality that is so ferocious, evil and cruel that craves for vengeance. It keeps on growing and expanding and I suspect it'll take over me one day. The more I get hurt, the more it grows and honestly speaking I don't mind if it does. People, such as students, teachers and so-called friends who betrayed me and hurt me, should rot in Hell!

From this point I started watching and reading mangas. The life they are living seems easier and more exciting, than reality. Those characters can live in imaginary worlds, where love and friendship is strongly cherished. I started reading and watching Naruto, the life they have may be difficult and bloody, but at least there they can understand each others skills and don't treat it as dirt. Of course I don't mean that the Naruto world is perfect, but if you have skills you are respected, that's what people are lacking now days, respect, compassion and warmth, for those who are struggling. Sigh, if only I lived in the world of Naruto. I could become a shinobi, have great skills in fighting, develop my confidence and be able to protect myself. I seriously want that all those people who inflicted such pain on me, to pay what they did.


	2. Chapter 1

Heya, everybody It's my first time posting a fanfic, but i do write pretty much of them as a hobby Anyway be prepared for the unexpected Have fun reading

**CHAPTER ONE**

**-Unexpected trip-**

"Thank God! School is over for another 3 weeks!" That's the first thing that came out of my mouth soon as I stepped into my house. With a huge yawn I lazily took off my shoes and dragged my feet along the stony beige tiles. I went to the kitchen and rummaged the fridge for something attractive and edible. With an infuriated groan I closed the fridge; I switched the coffee machine on and sunk in the nearby chair. Today was Friday, precisely 3:30PM and I came back from School by bus. Those sissy people who call them selves friends, bade me a wonderful vacation and my reply was the fakest of all fake things I could say "I wish y'all also a wonderful vacation!" I gave them my brightest smile and I rolled my eyes with irritation soon as I turned my back on them. I'm surrounded by idiots! Those people you call friends in School, are basically to use as an entertainment and they drop you soon as they don't see anything awe inspiring or attractive about you. Taking the bus is the worst part of my daily routine, this time is ideal for most students to pick fights and mob other students, because no damn teacher is around to pull their ears off if they misbehave! I could give you a list of people who literally need some smacking. Life cannot get any worse, can't it!

I sat back in the chair reminiscing what seems for ages, about what happened today. Well I don't want to think about it now, I want to relax and let the vacation mood kick in. My eyes wandered down my long slender fingers, on my right hand on the ring finger I carried a metal ring with a familiar sign engraved on a black surface. The lovely sign of Konoha. Underneath my shirt I wore a pendant also with the sign of Konoha embedded on a blue surface. I would say those things are the only things that kept me going. They are the only source of energy, which I always extract from if I'm stuck in a desperate situation. Well, if you think it's childish, well I don't give a damn! It's my problem if I wear this, I can make fun of those who wear simple rings or pendants too! Here is the evidence, I'm angry with my boring and infuriating life. I'm sick and tiered of it! I got up and grabbed a coffee cup from the cupboard and stuck it underneath the machine. The bitter but pleasant smell of coffee reached my nose and I smiled, at least I'll enjoy the best coffee ever. I fetched some sugar and a spoon and dipped in and afterwards grabbed my Schoolbag with the other hand and ascended the stairs. My room was on the third floor; yep it's a big house, a villa. I can only say we are, a family of nine people are fortunate to have a father that does great business. Not to say that I'm a spoiled brat or a snob, by the way I hate them, but that I'm quite the opposite, I am poor, but I never complain! As I climbed up the last stair a 6 meter hallway stretched out, composed of a long table with a computer and tons of games arranged nicely in a row. At the far end was a dusty white bookshelf with other tons of books. My little sisters' room was next to mine. Three little girls shared that room and I shared my room with my 16 year-old sister. On the same floor is also my parents' room. During the night it sounds like a bears cave, my parents are competing against each other in their sleep, especially when they snore in a choir or better said a symphony. I pushed the door open from my room and inhaled deeply the smell of comfort and relaxation. My room was situated in the back of the house, but luckily I had a window, which let in some light. As I stepped in I inhaled the scent of covers and stared for several minutes at my Naruto posters. On each of them was Kakashi visible and additionally I drew a picture of him 25 cm wide and 70 cm long. I'm sure you might've guessed who I prefer…KAKASHI of course!! I admire and worship him! Actually I never knew why I felt attracted to him, maybe because of his mysterious side, his face being covered with a mask which I would like to see or his concern for his team mates. Sniff. Unfortunately we don't see him fighting that much, only the episode with Haku and Tsabuza. Honestly speaking I would like to know about his background, although his past I'm aware of, his father committed suicide and his life with his team mates, etc. I seriously would like to know more about him. Although I have to give up that idealistic idea for good, because I cannot visit the Naruto world, its pure fictional and nothing else. That's when I sigh hopelessly. I let myself sink into my bed and stare at the ceiling; there I begin to day dream. It's part of my life and always will be, any human does that, they dream of their goal or dream of a perfect guy or girl whatsoever. Most importantly nobody can take this away from me. "Sarah! Sarah!" called the voice of my mother, interrupting my reverie. With another long sigh I got up and walk down to the source of the voice. Strange enough everybody was gathered in the living room, sitting unusually quiet on the couches and nobody dared to make a sound. I came in and joined my younger siblings on the couch.

"Listen up," My mother said in a serious tone. "We have to go on a trip."

"Whaat?!" were the first exasperations coming from my siblings, all of them had planned something and were complaining about it. Then a broad smile spread across her lips, this was going to be good.

"Your dad won a trip for 8 people, meaning we'll all go to Hawaii." She said excitedly, everybody jumped and shouted with happiness, but I was the only one who remained calm. Although I loved Hawaii, there was something that was bothering me extremely, so I showed my discontent.

"But Mom you said only 8 people can go." I reminded her seriously and she and the other calmed them selves down.

"Yea, it's true." She said with disappointment. Nobody in the room wanted to stay home, but I felt neutral about it. I instantly jumped up.

"Mom, I'll stay than, I really don't mind." I told her, but she remained unconvinced and guilty about my offer.

"Sarah, you'll know we'll be gone for 3 weeks. Isn't it too much for you? Won't you be lonely?" _Why the heck does she have to say that, I've been lonely my whole life for Pete's sake and am still alive! _

"Mom, I'm eighteen and no kid anymore, I should be fine." I told her insistently, but could tell by her look that she still wasn't convinced; I know she was reacting like this in a motherly way who's concerned about their child.

"Mom, I do know how to take care of myself, I seriously don't mind, honestly." I expressed this with most sincerity. I could detect some doubt in her eyes, but she was finally convinced of my statement.

"Okay Sarah, although I never expected you would do this, I thought maybe you're older brother would stay, but he seems to have changed plans."

My older brother wore a bright grin, clearly stating that he wouldn't miss such an opportunity. Then my mom rested her hands on my shoulders and looked at me with sincerity in her most motherly way.

"Sarah, don't think you are forced to stay, everybody would surely like you to come." She said and looked in the circle of my siblings and all wore that expression, which told me I should come.

"Mom, it's really nice of you, but I just remembered I had some serious stuff to finish for School." That was a blunt lie; the teachers would never give me homework over the vacations!

"What kind of homework?" She asked me, with an astonished tone.

"Well I have to do a project, which should be finished on Monday after the vacation." I told her calmly, "Also the problem is you are staying for 3 weeks in Hawaii, so I cannot come." My mom gave a thought to that, but I could see I convinced her.

"Okay Sarah, whatever you think is right for you, I cannot force you." She reconsidered and gave me a motherly smile.

"Everybody, get your things packed, because tomorrow at 3 PM we have a plane to catch." She said and everybody jumped gleefully around. My little sisters dashed up to their room and shouted for my mom's help. This was going to be an annoying time.

Several hours passed, everybody had packed their fat luggages for 3 weeks and was now going to sleep. My sister, with whom I share the room with, couldn't stop babbling of Hawaii and it seriously got on my nerves. Her constant protest of "Why don't you come and let somebody else stay?" and so on, when will this girl shut up! Finally she stopped talking and fell asleep. I was actually looking forward to having a house for myself, absolutely no noise or restrictions. I also fell into a peaceful dreamless slumber.

Saturday morning was horrifying and nerve wrecking, my family was going bananas! They were shouting for my mom's help about itsy bitsy stuff and advice. She would shout back at them and my Dad did the same thing. My parents' prepared an envelope with money for me in case of urgency and left some phone numbers also in case of emergency. HA! They still think I'm a kid or what! By 1:30 Pm with enormous noise and complaints they filled up the car and were ready to go. As I bade good bye to my siblings, my parents handed me the envelope and showed me the numbers. Apparently they alarmed their friends that I was going to take care of the house for 3 weeks.

"Honey, don't over work yourself, okay?" My mom said and came to me to give a strong hug. My Dad came to me and did the same.

"We will take our laptops so you can reach us on Skype." Said my father with a smile, it was apparent that they were worried about me. I gave them my greatest smile, which I truly meant.

"Don't worry I'll be fine, I'm legally an adult and no kid anymore, so please just enjoy your time in Hawaii." I told them expression my gratitude for their concern.

Again my parents gave me a hug and bade me good bye, so as I did to my siblings, who slightly mourned about my absence. The car dashed out of the private road and disappeared out of my view. YES, PEACE AT LAST FOR NEARLY A MONTH!!

I gratefully went back into the house and went to the computer to watch some Naruto episodes. However before I begin I must get my ring and pendant from my room. I dashed to my room, put my ring and pendant on and ran back down to the computer. A full session of Naruto episodes has occupied my day.

Time flew by so quickly and it was already 11 PM and I was nearly falling asleep. I forgot to eat lunch, so I quickly prepared myself a ramen. Indeed it was quiet, heavenly quiet, I sang softly to myself as the ramen started to cook.

After I ate the delicious food, I walked through the house, checking that everything was closed up well. Although I love the night, it can be scary when you are alone, but I lost the habit of being scared and kept my head in the clouds. My Naruto posters will keep me company and I can feel that Kakashi is watching over me. Exhaustedly I went up the stairs and closed the door behind me and changed myself into my pyjamas. I went over to "my self made" Kakashi poster and gave him a kiss on the mouth. If only he would be a real person, who could understand me and… love me.

I brushed my teeth and slipped into bed. This time I instantly fell asleep and was dreaming.

The Sunday morning I woke up blissfully. I jumped out of bed, ran down to the kitchen and ate in silence my breakfast. To fill the awkward silence I hummed to myself with a happy mood. It was a nice and calm. The spring sun was shining on the beautiful azure sky. The view was gorgeous, my house was built on a hill, so we had a magnificent view over the lake, which gleamed brightly and reflected the azure colour of the sky. Huge set of mountain held the lake company; now that there was no mist one could see the details of the formation and the villages across. It was breath catching! Although I lived here only for four years, I have the habit of ignoring it. The huge ships which carried oil, coal, sand and whatsoever material, were tiny, showing that the lake was kilometres away. One could see faintly the small waves building on the surface. This day would definitely be a beautiful day. I quickly finished my breakfast, cleaned up my mess, grabbed the remote and zapped through the channels. Out of utter boredom and laziness I was watching a cartoon. Most animes on TV were boring and tasteless. I let the time slip by and it was already lunch time. Again I prepared something to eat and pleased myself with my cooking style. Hours and hours flew by and I felt I didn't do anything accomplishing or good for myself and was already back in bed dozing off to a dreamless sleep.

The following 2 days Monday and Tuesday, I began to regret my decision about staying home for 3 weeks and it became more and more apparent as few other days passed. My daily routine was waking up, eating, watching TV, eating, computer, eating and going to bed. If my future would be like this I might as well hang myself for it! I was dead bored and lonesome. I went to the city, bought myself some food, went to a pizzeria, but it made me temporarily happy, but soon as I was on my way home the misery came back. It was as if I was going through a cursed cycle and it kept on getting worse and dragging my moral so low that I would keep myself in bed for a whole day. Then ideas began to form in my head. My family maybe didn't want me around them and knew I would stay back. I know this was absurd, but nothing could prove me I was wrong. After the 5th day I became very dull and absent, so that I forgot to do things. Additionally what angered me the most over night was some dim light glowing somewhere in my room, soon as I would get up and go to the source it would extinguish instantly. It was a strange, gold glow, a glow that would indicate an exit, or maybe a glow that one would see in fairy tale stories. No matter how fast I was, I could never find the source of that light. It was enticing and entrancing me and was very pleasant. Then one evening I went to bed fairly early and was briskly woken up, by some strange noises down below. Quietly I sneaked out of my bed, threw a thin jacket over my shoulders and zipped it closed, and then opened the door gently. I opened only a split, I was right; there were some suspicious and furtive noises down below. In the pitch black darkness I tiptoed quietly and swiftly down the stairs, avoiding making any noises, and then I crept in my brother's room to grab his professional baseball bat. I gripped with one hand the handle firmly; with hammering heartbeats I peeked out of the room and saw some light flooding beneath the door leading to my father's office just after the entrance hall. I remained frozen to spot, my muscles gone tense and were paralyzed, what the heck should I do? Should I attack right away? Should I call the police? I took a deep breath, I shouldn't panic now, and it'll only make it worse. My grip around the handle of the baseball was tight and tense; I was ready to fight and didn't want to call for the cops. So I opened the door and tiptoed down the last stairs to reach the ground floor. I glanced at the door it was intact, no circular glass cut out or shattered glass on the floor. How did the intruder come in? I was sure I closed all windows. I listened intently at the noise being made, there was a sound of papers being shuffled through and spilt on the floor. My heart was racing so fast against my chest that I couldn't even hear my breathing, everything was awkwardly quiet, no sound of cars passing by no nothing. It was creepy; it was a moonless and clear night. I was standing in front of the door hesitating whether I should go in, after all I didn't want that robber to steal anything from us. Suddenly the noise ceased and the footsteps started approaching the door, I quickly hid myself behind a corner in the entrance hall, the door brusquely opened and the intruder stepped out. I shrunk back as much as I could into the corner, praying that whoever that might be wouldn't find me. I felt that the intruder looked to the entrance, he neared the door frame, but stopped and studied something, and he was intensively listening. Instantly he turned away and his footsteps headed furtively to the living room, I took a deep breath and got up quietly and tiptoed with a hunched back to the kitchen. (By the way the living room and kitchen are adjoined). I raised my head to look over the bar and spotted a tall, well built figure; it began to move so I quickly dropped on all fours and crawled my way to that person. I had to get that bastard! I won't let him run away! The intruder seemed to be looking for something and was rummaging through the shelves. This was my chance! I got up from behind the couch, jumped over it and swung my bat against his back. The intruder let out a groan and dropped to his knees, but he could get a hold of himself and was up already and shoved me against the wall. I banged the back of my head against the concrete wall, for some minutes a pitch black cover clouded my sight, but I shook my head to gain back my awareness. I wanted to move away but it was too late, the intruder wrenched the bat out of my hands to force it against my throat, cutting off my oxygen. I desperately croaked for air. Then I used my leg and kicked him in the balls, where he dropped the bat and dropped on his knees. He kneeled in front of me, so I gave him a kick in the stomach. An aggravated groan escaped him, but when I tried to kick him again, he grabbed my leg and pulled me forcefully. I fell on top of him, I scrambled on my knees away from him, but he threw himself on top of me, pinning me down to the floor. He chuckled underneath his breath.

"You are such a tough little one. Looks like now days the modern house security would be a girl, how sweet." Sneered the man with triumph, I felt the panic already rising in me and my heart was beating out of dread. With each word pronounced I could feel his hot breath on my face, his well built body was overpowered mine, I was stuck to the floor and nothing could push him off of me. Then I felt his slick finger trailing a line along my cheek. His weight shifted forward and I sensed his body heat radiating through mine, which made my stomach curdle in utter dread and disgust. His slick face brushed along my cheek and I sensed his hot breath only cm away from my ear.

"You have to pay with your body for all the damage you inflicted on me." He breathed hotly in my ear and with a fearful whimper I pulled my head away from his deranging and disgusting voice.

His voice was one of those maniacs who sounded gentle but in an insane way, he breathed his words in a sickening sensual voice, which made my insides want to get sick over him. From the tone of his voice, he sounded like a man between the age 20 and 30. My body failed to move out of panic and dread; he had my wrists pinned down on either side.

"Get off me!" I croaked fearfully with tears streaming down my face.

"Oooh, aren't you a feisty one, that makes it more interesting." He supplied with amusement and some excitement in his slick and disgusting tone.

"Sick and twisted pervert! Get off me!" I hollered back and struggled underneath his weight. The man chuckled triumphantly. Instantly he crushed his lips hungrily on mine, my eyes widened in shock and I struggled against him but he forced his body closer to mine, smothering me with his body heat. His hammering heartbeats against my chest, his quick breath made me sick. Without difficult his tongue slid into mine and explored the inside, the mix of his saliva in my mouth made me wanted to get sick in his mouth. It was unbearable; I was trembling, whining out of dread. I wish this to end now! I cannot take this any longer! Then he released my wrists and trailed a way with his hands along my body. I twisted at each of his touches, which stung like thousands of needles. "Please somebody help me!" I screamed in my mind with insanity, I thought about my family and wished they were back now to help me! I mostly wished Kakashi would be here to help me! He removed his lips from my mouth and trailed down my neck skilfully. Then his hand made sudden contact with my bare skin underneath my shirt and I gasped with horror. My panic was close to the peak and if it reached that point, I would be broken. Suddenly his hand underneath my shirt made contact with my breast and it clicked inside me and I screamed with all my might.

"KAKASHIIIIIIIIII!!" Briskly a sudden blast erupted out of nowhere, catapulting the intruder forcefully aside and an insane blazing light, blinded my sight. I shut my eyes, crouched into a ball and defensively covered my head with my arms. Something supernatural was happening even though I couldn't see it, but I felt it, I was being drawn into something and instantly being squeezed through a hole, as if being forced through a tube. I was suffocating, I felt like being forced in an underwater pipe with no possibility to breath. My sight became blurry, gradually darkened, my head began to spin and all of a sudden I just passed out.


	3. Chapter 2

thx for the commies It's been a great time writing that story, it never ceases to entertain me I'll be regularly releasing the chapies (actually i finished the story already) but I wanna see if people are interested in my story, if more people demand for it the quicker i will release more chapies So hope you'll enjoy reading this "delicious" fanfic, he he

**CHAPTER TWO**

**- Into the New World -**

A soft summary breeze tickled my nose, as it blew and whirred gracefully, rustling the trees and bushes, carrying the smell of leaves and humidity. It seemed I was bedded on a soft earthy ground, covered with fresh and dried leaves, moss and grass. I heard the birds chirping over my head, little forest animals nibbling on their food and jumping from branches to other. All that I knew was that I felt at ease and preferred lying there with my eyes closed. I knew I couldn't, so I opened my eyes, first thing I saw were the green sun rays radiating through the dense forestage. I sat up and soon afterwards dropped backwards with an aggravating groan.

"Argh, my head!" I massaged my temples with the tip of my fingers. From that weird transportation a strong headache had overcome me, well apparently it was a transportation, because Hell I don't know where I am and it certainly didn't look like the forest at my home!

"This starts well." I grumbled and slowly sat up. I was in a deep woodland forest, it was wild, and here at least nature could grow without restrictions, just like an enchanted forest. However there was some strange familiarity to this place, I felt like I knew this area from somewhere, but from where? I got up to my feet and staggered at the first few steps and collapsed at the next. Whatever that trip did to me, I completely lost my sense of balance and why do I feel so strange? I crawled to the nearest tree and used the tree as an aid to get myself back on my feet. I took a deep breath, I felt absolutely ridiculous, I'm like a one-year old kid trying to walk its first steps or I felt like a mermaid who lost its tail and received feet instead. Spontaneously I rested my hand on my chest and felt something underneath; I pulled out a pendant and noticed the Konoha emblem on it. I raised it up to my face and kissed it.

"Thank you, for saving me." I thanked the pendent.

That thing brought me always luck. Then the images flooded back into my mind. I clenched my fist tightly, if he hadn't been interrupted maybe by now I would've been raped and I swallowed uncomfortably at the thought of it. Anyway I have no time for this, so I started walking through the forest. Obviously I wore no shoes, but I wasn't bothered by it. I walked and walked for what seems hours, I found no water and anything edible and my stomach was killing me. I was tripping and staggering over every single wine, but kept on going, my body was insisting for an end to this forest, because the dense forest was driving me crazy! Another thing that was worrying was not only my hunger but that strange feeling within my body, all of the sudden I collapsed to the ground. A painful yell escaped my mouth and I was clutching my body, what was this burning feeling inside me? Why was it so hot? I forced myself to get up by using the tree to aid me; I wrapped one arm around my abdomen and used my other arm as guide to find other sturdy trees to aid me with walking. I pulled a painful grimace, at the same time I felt like being stabbed by billions of needles and burning up in the inside. I kept on going and forced myself to ignore the pain although it was impossible. Then I heard the rushing of water, my eyes widened with hope, I sped up my pace and within minutes I was standing on a stony shore of a crystal clear rushing river. The scene was beautiful! I've never seen such a fruitful area and clean and clear water. Water and forest was united and created such beautiful serenity, I was touched by it. I dropped to my knees and took a scoop of water and rubbed into my face, the cool effect blew away the hunger and satisfied my thirst. I spotted something in the water; I looked intensively and saw another person's reflection. I turned around, but I saw nobody. I looked back into the water, the reflection was there again and I finally realized it was me. I leaped back out of startle, and then looked back into the water. My appearance changed completely, I wasn't human but an anime?! I had shoulder length wavy, honey coloured hair with aqua marine eyes and nice full lips. My eyes seemed like cat eyes, which I actually instantly liked and my new appearance made me look older than 18. I could be easily mistaken for somebody of the age of 25 or so! Then I started examining the rest of my appearance (I know one would normally notice changes, but this was certainly extreme!) I had long slender feminine fingers with nice long nails. My body was very womanly shaped and I was very athletic the way my muscles were built. I was actually fit! Those changes really freaked me out! My clothes were my pyjamas, a navy blue trainer with a black tank shirt. My God! I looked like a Goddess of Beauty itself! All of a sudden I crumbled to my knees, I slapped my hand over my chest and the other over my mouth, a strong sting came from my heart and I begun coughing unceasingly, to the fact that I collapsed face down. Such strong stinging came within, for some seconds due to the coughing, I couldn't breathe. I etched some substance, splattering it over my palm.

"Blood?" I repeated weakly. "How can that be? I'm vaccinated towards all viruses."

I cannot die here and certainly not in an anime for God's sake! Nobody will know I'm dead. With enormous struggle and physical complaints I was back on my feet again. It seems that I need to cross this river. I went to a couple of rocks and jumped from one to another. When I reached halfway, my body suddenly became paralyzed and I lost balance and fell into the rushing river. I couldn't move my body, I tried my best to keep my head above the water level but the current kept on pushing me down. I was conscious through the rowdy ride and briskly hit my head against a log and was unconscious already. I partially regained consciousness to notice that I was drifting along the river under a calm current with my face down. Then I was stopped by something and turned over. The sun beams blinded me for a second, so that I had to blink sometimes, then a person held its head in front of the sun. Only slowly my vision cleared and I recognized the person, a smile crept over my face.

"Finally you came…" I uttered weakly. Then I lost my consciousness completely.

A repugnant smell of chemicals and disinfectants lingered in my noise. Where was I? What are those voices? I heard people talking in the background, they echoed in my head accompanied by the sound of something rolling over the floor, a bed? Am I home? I dozed off again and awoke later, not a single noise was heard, only very low whispers. I slowly opened my eyelids halfway, the first thing I saw was white and then I opened my eyes completely and found myself in a hospital. I sighed deeply.

"I hate hospitals." I grumbled

"You are not the only one." Replied another voice in the corner, I yelped out of startle and my eyes jumped to that figure. I gaped at what my eyes met.

"Holy Shit, that can't be!" I spluttered with utter disbelief and pulled the covers up to my chin.

"What?" replied that lazy voice of his. I stared blankly at that figure, scanning his appearance with disbelief. There stood the popular shinobi in the World of Naruto, the one I worship. Silver hair, a blackish blue cloth covered his face up to his nose, left eye was scarred and carried the Sharingan, which was covered with his Headgear. In his right hand was that orange book of his.

"You are Hatake Kakashi?"

"Hm."

"THE famous copy ninja, Hatake Kakashi?"

"Is that a problem?"

"Well, no, um, no"

"Good. So be quiet."

"Hey! Don't order me around!"

"Better close your mouth, otherwise I'll close it myself."

"Go ahead make me!"

"Seriously, Kakashi you shouldn't pick fights with patients." Boomed the voice of Gai, Kakashi turned around and gave an indifferent look. The freaky dude with the bushy black brows and bowl hair cut and tight green clothes, barged into the room. I was shocked of his bizarre appearance, especially because it looked so real.

"She started it." Kakashi began.

"Gai san, he started insulting, a wounded patient." I told Gai and batted my eye lashes, sucking up on him. His face softened up and he glared at Kakashi.

"How dare you do that to her, she's severely hurt." Accused Gai and I turned my head to Kakashi and gave him a cunning smirk. Kakashi would usually remain indifferent in such a situation; however at Gai's presence he gave me scowl. Gai then gave his speech involving youth and whatsoever hippy, bizarre stuff. I could feel Kakashi's glare resting on me and I gave him a sly grin and stuck my tongue out. His glare intensified. I rolled my eyes indifferently and sighed.

"Men."

"What did you say?"

"Nothing."

"I heard you."

"Good for you, do you need a price?"

"Yea, your head."

"Well, go and get it!"

"What the Hell is going on here!" Emerged a powerful voice and stepped inside the room, finding us held by Gai's arms.

"Incredible, I can't leave a patient alone, without you Kakashi getting them killed." Sighed Tsunade hopelessly.

"You are lucky that you arrived in time, if Kakashi hadn't found you, you might've been dead." Informed Tsunade with her strong voice and her sharp eyes focused on me.

I remembered that I completely forgot that Kakashi found me on the way, so I looked over at Kakashi who stood next to my bed and I smiled nervously at him.

"Thank you."

"No need. Though, I really regretted that I ever found you."

"You cold hearted bastard!" I snapped.

"Who's cold hearted, apparently you are!"

"I'm not, you told me to shut up in a mean way, like I was your dog!"

"At least dogs obey!"

"How DARE you compare me to a dog!?"

"SHUT UP!!" bellowed Tsunade's voice, making the whole hospital tremble. Kakashi, Gai and I looked were so horrified of Tsunade that we stopped speaking.

"Stop quarrelling like an old married couple!" Mentioned Tsunade sarcastically.

Kakashi and I eyed each other and looked away with disgust. Tsunade cleared her throat.

"Anyway, there are important matters that we must discuss about. Kurenai and Asuma should be coming any minute." Briefed Tsunade and soon after the door slid open and Asuma stepped in, closely followed by Kurenai.

"Good everybody's here, let's cut to the chase." Said Tsunade with her arms crossed over her chest.

"What's your name? Where are you from? Are you on a mission or did you stray from one? Or are you a spy?" asked Tsunade with a stern voice, as if it was an interrogation. It certainly was one and with her I know I shouldn't be rebellious. I sighed deeply and sat up, eyeing all Jounins with seriousness.

"I'm Handshin Sara, where I'm from I don't know. All I know I was home several hours ago and found myself in the forest. I'm not on a mission and didn't stray from one and I AM NOT A SPY!" I stated to them clearly without blinking and kept eye contact with all people in the room.

All Jounins exchanged looks with Tsunade and amongst them selves; I could see that they were unconvinced.

"You have no licence to prove what you are, you have no ID even." Said Tsunade firmly and I nodded showing that I was aware of that.

"You only carried this around you." She said and my pendant dangled down her hand and she handed to me. I took it and looked at it.

"It carries Konoha's emblem." She added and all Jounins exchanged looks.

"Where did you get this?" asked Tsunade, I kept my eyes on the pendent.

If I would say I bought it, they would do a search party and kill whoever sells that stuff and if I gave them the wrong information I would be killed as well.

"I don't know how to explain, where I received this." I told them, but knew that this answer was unsatisfactory.

"I checked your medical status, your body does not seem to be adjusted to our environment - can you explain this?" Verified Tsunade and skimmed through a notepad of my medical conditions.

"I'm an average person that never studied Ninjutsu, Genjutsu, but there is a reason why I am here." I told them truthfully and the people in the room observed me with anticipation.

"I want to become a shinobi." I declared.

Tsunade broke out in an arrogant and jeering laugh.

"What nonsense! You wind up at the hospital with no identity, denying any information about yourself, half-way drowned and expecting that we would train you to become a shinobi? This is ridiculous!" listed Tsunade with a jeer.

I diverted my gaze; feeling a bit humiliated of her mockery, but persisted.

"I want to protect myself from danger and protect my family as well."

My fingers clenched the bed covers, relating to the memories of that robber.

"And why do you have such interest in becoming a shinobi, whereas you have other places that could provide you with such training?" asked Tsunade arrogantly.

"Have you never been in a humiliating situation?" I questioned her back in the face, ignoring part of her question and eyeing everybody with the fury I felt not so long ago.

"Have you been in a situation, where your have no escape? Where fear takes over your body and you are helpless and paralyzed?" I looked in the circle and realized that such information was useless, none of them were engaged into my speech and none of them even approved any emotions.

"I experienced that situation; it destroyed my pride and my self-esteem." I continued.

The tension in the room was smothering. I kept my gaze to my fingers that trembled while they gripped the covers. Were there any other alternatives instead of using my rape as an excuse to be accepted into Konoha? Why did I need to talk about this? I wanted to forget it? And was it of any use? I took a deep breath and declared strongly:

"I was nearly raped! That is why I want to become a shinobi in order to protect myself from that sort of humiliation! IS IT A SIN TO ASK SUCH A REQUEST?!" I shouted at them with such fury and frustration that tears began to flow down my face.

I dropped back to my bed and covered up myself and sobbed strongly into the pillow.

"Just leave me alone! ALL of you!" I sobbed.

I didn't hear any questioning or protests, only my heavy sobs killed all other sounds produced outside. However I heard movements heading to the door and the door closed quietly, leaving me alone with my misery. In a short amount of time, exhaustion overcame me and I fell asleep.


	4. Chapter 3

**Comment for chapter 3 till 5**

**Honto gomen!! I've been pretty "busy", yea "busy" in the vacation... To redeem for my past sins I have updated three chapters for my dear readers!! So this chapie and two more, hope you enjoy it... I think I made Kakashi pretty sexy At some moments during the story, i couldn't stop myself from squealing and even "drooling" 0o! If you noticed that Kakashi is out of character, than i am really sorry... Kakashi is a complex and mysterious character, I collected lot of ideas from other fanfics and hell it was difficult to keep him in character!! Nevertheless i like this Kakashi from this story So,...enjoy and watch how both characters develop Ah, yes, almost forgot: Please feel free to be critical, i can accept critics because it points out what i need to improve in my writing. Actually blush in embrassment i want to become a writer, so give me positive and negative comments  
**

* * *

**  
**

**CHAPTER THREE**

- New ability, but a painful start-

For several days I was kept in the same hospital room and was restricted any access outside. Only the window beside my bed gave me the overview of Konoha. It became a daily routine to just sit at the edge of my bed, hugging my legs and simply staring out of the window into the active village of Konoha. I refused eating, because of the trauma and the fact that I was suspected for a criminal. Since I had nothing to do except staring out of the window, I busied myself training my body with push ups and sit ups. I had a go on some chakara techniques such as climbing walls, it didn't work at first, but I gradually got the hang of it. It was relief to know that I could adjust to the Naruto world, inheriting the chakara and probably other shinobi skills. Also there was this strange feeling inside of me, which worried me since my arrival in Konoha. I couldn't understand what it was. Noticing some gradual improvements, I decided to test my abilities and on a rainy night. I opened the window big enough that I could jump down to the roof. I jumped to the nearest building; I was amazed how my body was automatically adapting to the Naruto world without any effort. There, I moved from roof to another by hopping huge distance at high speed. I was like Spiderman enjoying his powers of jumping from roof to another. The raindrops fell strongly soaking my clothes within seconds, I was enjoying every moment of my life here. I don't know where I was running; the fog was hovering over the houses rendering it impossible to see where I was heading. Once I slipped and fell down, but actually didn't hurt myself only received a couple of bumps. At some point the houses ended and until I saw green fields. As I landed firmly on the ground, actually even barefoot I noticed a black grave stone. Was that the grave stone of the Great shinobi war? I trotted over and read through some of the names. I spotted one and smiled.

"You know you resemble Naruto awfully, although you were an Uchiha, Obito." I muttered sentimentally and then I went to a nearby tree and decided to do some training. I raised my index and middle finger to concentrate my chakara into my feet. I stepped backwards and ran up the tree, first time I managed to run up half way and after the second time I was intelligent enough to understand the working and managed to walk to the top. Then I searched for a lake and found an enormous one, again I preformed the same technique and concentrated my chakara into my feet. I walked on the surface of the water and jumped around in excitement at my success in less than a day. I felt a sudden surge in my body, affecting my surroundings. The water seemed to be whispering me to me, enchanting me so that I went in the middle of the lake. As I stretched out my palm, the water was attracted to my hand like a magnet. I took a scoop of water in my hand and watched in wonder at the water floating above my palm forming into a ball. If my mind thought about a square it made one, I could actually manipulate water. Next I formed a force field made of water all around me; shaped like a dome. One could say I was like Gaara of the Sand except that my name was Sara of the Waters. I crossed my arms over my chest and thought that the water should transport me to the shore and it worked, I rode on a wave and it brought me to shore. Afterwards I ran as quickly as possible back to the hospital, without being detected and this grew a habit when I was imprisoned in the Konoha hospital. Fortunately the fog begun to rise and I finally could trace my way back to the hospital. Suddenly a shiver ran down my spine and landed on a nearby roof and turned back to glance with high awareness around my surroundings. I had the feeling that somebody was following me, strange enough in the Naruto world; my body became a radar that could detect some things. I think that was how the shinobis could sense if somebody was nearby. I could sense some low amount of chakara coming from behind me. I instantly turned to the source and decided to head towards it, I jumped from roof to other and landed on one of them, where this tingling sensation in me was saying "Somebody's here." I remained still and listened intensively, only the sound of raindrops plopping, tapping on the roof and the stormy wind whirring through the area was heard. The dark clouds rumbled above my head, roaring with thunder and sending flashes of lightning down to earth. My body became numb towards the soaking feeling on my skin; I actually lost my sense of feeling. My once honey blond hair, turned dark and fell like a mop down my face. Whoever was following me, I bet it was one of Tsunade's appointed supervisors. I didn't expect they would welcome me with open arms anyway. I sighed deeply and turned away from that so-called chakara source.

"Whoever you are, I hope you are enjoying yourself spying on me." I declared loudly with an aggravated tone. It was dead silent; either that individual who was following me hid itself or didn't want to blow cover, or wanted to make me think I was hallucinating.

"I'm not an idiot you know, I can sense you, but I'm just too kind to go and find out who's stalking me actually." I uttered indifferently with my arms crossed over my chest.

"Now you can write a fat report to Tsunade sama, on my so-called "evil doing" of simply taking a stroll at night time." I added with sarcasm.

Finally I heard some movement from behind me and a light tapping sound was heard. I turned around and found the drenched copy nin. His silver hair hung sloppily down, looking like a sponge. His dark ninja clothing, stuck to his body and his green vest with the pouches had changed to a dirty olive green.

"I knew it was you." I said indifferently with my arms still crossed over my chest and eyeing him. Kakashi wore his lazy look, but there was a hint of seriousness in his face.

"Your appearance is deceitful." He began with his calm voice and came a bit closer to me, confronting me.

"Is that so?"

"You know much more than you think, especially your familiarity with Konoha and knowing names of people."

"You mean like, Asuma, Kurenai and Gai san?" Suddenly I slapped my hand over my mouth, realizing what I just said and cursed myself. "Shit!" The following action was very sudden and I couldn't even follow it, the last thing I registered was an arm firmly wrapped over my chest and a kunai hovering below my chin. I felt Kakashi's body pressed against my back, as he tried to get a hold of me. I was too stunned to react and was very sensitive at his body contact against my skin. My heart began to race and a tinge of blush crept over my cheeks and my stomach fluttered. His head was above my left shoulder.

"Spill everything you know, otherwise I'll slit your throat." Kakashi threatened me in a grave tone.

His voice rumbled in my ear and I pulled my head away, but Kakashi held the kunai firmly against my throat to prevent me from moving. It was the first time I saw Kakashi this hostile with strangers. Normally he would be absent of emotions and keep an indifferent tone, but this time he was dead serious. His body contact was suffocating; I still wasn't completely healed from my trauma with the robber. Panic grew inside of me as his arm grip tightened around my chest and the cool sharp blade brushed against my throat. The pressure was building and building, through his drenched clothes I could feel the heat of his body radiating through mine. Tears started to trickle down my cheeks.

"Please stop it." I squeaked with a plea; I heard a confused "huh" coming from his side and the kunai drop to the ground with a "clang".

"Don't touch me!" I shouted and instantly shrunk away from him, shivering and staring at him horror struck. I clasped my arms over my trembling frame. Kakashi stared at me wide-eyed; it seems like he wasn't expecting that sort of reaction from me. No matter if it rained, my hot tears streamed down my face, mingling with the raindrops.

"So I wasn't hallucinating, it was you who screamed earlier." He realized and at that statement I stopped sobbing and raised my head to meet his eyes. This was the confirmation of his statement.

"I heard your scream for help, actually scream for my name." He said slowly, expressing concern. "It was so full of agony." I was disbelieved, how did he hear my scream? Wasn't I in my world? Was there some crack during this gap of dimension? This question remained unanswered.

"I thought I was going insane, I heard you screaming several times, as if you were undergoing some torture." He said with difficulty, rubbing the back of his head and averting his gaze showing some uneasiness. I would be also reacting like Kakashi, listening to somebody's pleas and screams during torture is traumatizing and sickening.

"How do you know my name? We never met." He questioned with curiosity, but I could tell he was awaiting an answer.

"I'm sorry I can't tell you," I apologized quietly. "You wouldn't understand."

"I would never betray Konoha, because it's my only home." I added with sincerity and looked at Kakashi meaningfully. Kakashi had returned to his emotionless self, so I wasn't sure if I convinced him or not.

"I'm relieved that you are fine now, because I seriously was worried about you," he admitted with the same discomfort and I looked at him with surprise and disbelief.

He seemed to have noticed I was moved by his statement, so he suddenly cleared his throat as if to reiterate his statement.

"I know it's strange for me to say that, normally I wouldn't say such things, well you know, because I don't know you. I also wanted the screaming to stop, because it was unbearable." He tried to explain, as if trying to find an excuse and correct his previous statement and he sighed as he noticed it failed.

"Thank you very much." I replied affectionately with a smile and lowered my eyes.

I certainly was dreaming, Kakashi wouldn't show such care, but anyway it could be a simple student and teacher relationship. Well, I don't want it to be like that! No reply came from Kakashi; I only could feel that he was staring at me. The rain still towered down upon us, but the storm was gone.

"I think I should go back." I suggested, but soon as I made a move, dizziness struck me and a horrible headache overcame me, I staggered and was about to tilt over when Kakashi caught me in his arms instantly. A blush crept over my cheeks, as he looked down on me.

"Sorry, I think I must be sick, because I feel very drowsy." I said apologetically with a weak chuckle. Kakashi shook his head and rolled his eyes in annoyance and placed his hand on my forehead and pulled it away.

"Well, you shouldn't be running around in the rain like this, lightly dressed." He scolded me. "You are such a pain."

I couldn't tell him about my sudden new abilities, although it was great news, but somehow I think I'll end up in jail if I'd tell him.

"I'll carry you on my back." He stated calmly.

He helped me up, still holding my hand and helped me on his back. This sensation of his hand touching mine sent flutters into my stomach and made my heart skip a beat. I wish this moment could be prolonged. Now that I was straddled on his back, it increased those sensations inside of me. I nuzzled my head against his broad and strong back, a soft "huh" escaped from his mouth. I ignored his surprised remark and simply enjoyed this wonderful moment. I discretely inhaled his scent, although he was soaking wet, his scent was comforting. I don't know how to describe that scent but I just knew it smelled very manly. I couldn't believe that Kakashi was so real, that I could even feel him. The nice moment ended far too soon and he brought me back into my room, the window was ajar and by sliding it open, it was wide enough to fit several people through. As Kakashi stepped in the room, he let me get off his back and I softly landed on my feet. I shuddered at the absence of his body heat. My God; I bet with that body of his he could keep a whole house warm! He headed to the window and stood on the ledge with his knees bent. Luckily the room was dark and outside too, so that my red face wasn't visible.

"I'll see you soon." He mentioned cheerfully with his eyes crinkling, his mask creased revealing a smile.

"Thank you, again." I thanked him with a smile. He raised his palm sideways, pulling down his thumb and the ring finger and his little finger and vanished in a puff of smoke. I stared dreamily at the place he was a second ago, my God he's so hot! HE looked especially hot, when his clothes stuck to him, picturing him like that made me drool. I closed my eyes and still felt the places where my body touched his; a shiver went down my spine. However, somehow, deep inside me I knew that admiring him, or even loving him was hopeless. In all Naruto episodes I've seen, he doesn't show a bit of affection, I mean in a sense of going into deep relationships. I think the reason why he avoids getting too attached to someone, is because he doesn't want to be hurt again. After all, all the people he had been close to died, it's as if he had a curse on him and that anybody who came close to him would instantly and inevitably die. I don't believe in curses, but in the Naruto story you have to start believing in it, it becomes damn obvious that soon as you put yourself in danger there is a risk that you may die and break somebody's heart. This was apparent, when Asuma died and Kurenai was bearing his baby. Damn! This bit I cried like a baby! How unfair! I knew that there was something going on between them since the beginning! Uhm, well actually if you study Asuma, he's actually hot and well Kurenai is pretty. Though she's weak, compared to the other Jounins and not so daring as Gai, Asuma and Kakashi, nevertheless she's clever. However there is one thing I hate the most about Naruto, are the girls! They behave like a bunch of sissies and are so damn shy, Sakura is a great example for that, uh yeah, and she's telling herself that she's weak and useless! Well, shut up you dork! Why do all girls in Naruto think that they are weak, for God's sake! Never heard of gender equality, HUH!! I'm defending the women, you know by showing your strength, showing that you are strong, determined you get respect, people won't judge you for weak. Suddenly the clouds cracked a thunder, which brought me back from my contemplation. How did I divert myself from the topic of "Kakashi" to gender equality?! Seriously, I can be very strange; I get all emotional and babble about irrelevant nonsense! I closed the window and pulled the curtains shut. I switched the light on and decided to take a hot shower, I was freezing. If only Kakashi could keep me warm the whole night… WHAT THE HELL AM I THINKING ABOUT!! GETTING DIRTY THOUGHTS ALREADY!! Anyway I barely know him and he barely knows me, so I must preferably hide my feelings and avoid getting toooooo close to him. I know that my chances of conquering Kakashi, is zero, or minus a hundred! I rummaged through the cupboard to find a pair of clothes; I found some simple trainers and headed to the showers. After standing in the showers for what seems hours until my skin became red, right after I went to bed and fell asleep.

I woke up the next morning to the sound of birds chirping and the faint noise of passing wheels squeaking and screeching in front of my room. Not so far away there was laughter and chattering, though it did not come from my room. I could hear Konoha was in movement, there was some hammering in the distant from a construction sight. The sun beams were flooding through the curtains, gosh what are curtains for? Aren't they supposed to fend off light and not be transparent! I gloomily yawned like a hippopotamus bored of its cage and fed up of its visitors. My room was deserted, not a soul was here. Now it has been a week since I was in the Naruto world and believe me I didn't like being locked up. Although I had a bright moment yesterday, still it brought my mood down to the ground. I've been undergoing experiments and felt like being treated as a lab rat and now I can easily sympathise with those creatures. I think when I get home, the first thing I'll be doing is setting the lab rats free. Another thought came to me, I was many times put asleep as well, and I wonder what kind of tests they were doing on me? I sighed deeply; I can stand this cage any longer. I closed my eyes briefly and opened them seconds later; a smirk crept over my face. I jumped out of bed and went over to the cupboard to find something suitable to wear. I rummaged through my whole room and strange enough, one cupboard that supposedly should be locked was unlocked. In there I found tons of nurse uniforms. With a wide grin I grabbed the uniform. I was quite shocked how I looked like, the uniform was composed of a white knee lengthen dress, with some strange pouches around the chest and strange enough there wasn't any tag. Apparently they are tag less nurses working here, which is advantageous for me. Another thing what I didn't like was that the uniform was kind of tight around my chest (since when did I have large boobs?!) and kind of a low cut, no matter how many times I tried to button it, it always unbuttoned itself. I groaned with frustration, I don't want to look like a prostitute!! Then I spotted another thing, how fortunate can you get, there was a hairbrush and hair things, even some make up!! I grabbed a hold of that stuff and stormed to the bathroom, let the disguising begin! Within minutes, I transformed my beautiful face to a gorgeous one, I couldn't recognize myself! Well, no wonder, after all it wasn't my real body. I put a lot of foundation, some blush, mascara, eye shadow and lip stick, of course I didn't look like a prom queen, but a 25 year old lady, sexy lady!! I tied my hair to a bun and put that nurse hat on, wow, damn I look pretty! I did some quick arrangements, such as stuffing the bed with some pillows and putting a broom underneath the covers, which had the similar colour of my hair. I know that it was a brainless and so un-shinobi like, but hey I don't know how to do the clone jutsu yet. I grabbed a bag, stuffed my freshly washed trainers I mean my pyjama from home, the black trainers with a black tank top and put my Konoha pendant on and hid it. Then slowly I opened the sliding door from my room and slipped out. I walked casually passed some nurses and doctors, who greeted me politely and friendly. Gosh, I was a talent, it worked my disguise. I walked towards the end of the corridor to take the stairs down, but as I descended the stairs a medic Nin noticed me and walked towards me, oh shit! He had messed up brown hair and almond eyes; his allure was friendly and casual, maybe even very sincere. He smiled at me.

"Hi, I never saw you here, are you new?" he asked me curiously and I nodded with a smile.

"Yes, I am actually." I replied calmly.

"What's your name?" he asked me, it took me a second to think of a name.

"Suzuki Kaori." I replied sweetly, what kind of dumb name was that, can you believe my family name is a brand of a motorcycle for Pete's sake!

"Suzuki?" he repeated thoughtfully. "It doesn't sound like from Konoha." I chuckled nervously.

"Well, it's a long story you know, my parents moved to Konoha when I was 5. I did lot of travelling and studied medicine, basically I rarely stayed in Konoha." I told him calmly. Man oh man, Sarah, how can you come up with such crap?

"Oh, interesting." He replied calmly. I was relieved that guy, didn't sense anything suspicious.

"Uhm, I hate to say this, but you know it's my first day here and a friend of mine works here and she told me to meet her at the locker room, can you tell me where it is?" I began to ask him in a very sweet matter, basically sweet talking him.

The guy, who somehow had difficulty resisting a glance at my boobs, finally gave in with a friendly smile.

"Just go down the stairs, till the ground floor, then walk passed the reception and descend another stairs and there you will find the locker room." He explained to me.

"Thank you so much." I said delightfully with a smile, I felt that he melted at my act, ha! I descended the stairs.

"Kaori san." His voice called down the stairs and I stopped dead in my tracks, please don't tell me that he found out or something. I turned around with a smile.

"When can I meet you again?" he asked me somewhat eagerly, this guy seriously liked me, oh my God!

I didn't know I could flirt that well!! Though I must say I gained a lot of experience by watching animes, all girls behave girlishly and I simply imitated them. In a girlish manner I rested one finger over my lips and closed one eye, with a girlish smile and bent forward slightly.

"I dunno, another time I guess." I replied innocently, I brought him to a complete melt down and giggled and ran down the stairs. My God, what a pussy act! If men seriously like such girls, then I might as well become a man! I swiftly descended the stairs and was walking along the ground floor hallway, I remember that a couple of meters away was the entrance hall and reception, which might be risky to cross if anybody would recognise me. I took a deep breath and walked determinedly, the entrance hall was approaching fast. I glanced around I had to take something in my arms, some brochure or whatsoever to make me look like I was working. I noticed a nurse dropped some things on the floor and set, a note pad aside, as I passed by I grabbed it and held against my chest. Now I looked like an active nurse. As I stepped in the entrance hall I took a brief glance, if anybody familiar was there, but luckily only strangers walked around. I pretended to be skimming through the notes as I passed by the reception, I kept my head lowered and my eyes fixed on the notes, avoiding making any eye contact with any of the doctors. I walked painfully casual to create no suspicion and finally I reached the stairs and descended them quickly. I entered a room with a tag inscribed "personal only" and found the locker room. The room was equipped with long benches between each aisle of lockers and further in the back was the bathroom and showers. Fortunately nobody was there, so I quickly changed myself into my clothes and threw the nurse uniform in the nearby bin. That is the last time I wear that in my life! I adjusted some changes on my clothing, like all shinobis I bind the bandages underneath my rolled up trainers down to my ankles. I helped myself from the clothing on the hooks and grabbed a pair of black shinobi sandals and other small things. Also I bind some bandages along my forearms. Sorry whoever, but I need to borrow your stuff, I needed to get out of this place. I looked for a mirror and ended having a grin on my face. I looked like a shinobi from a foreign country, practically dressed in black with white bandages and black sandals. However only my blond hair and blue eyes stuck out like a sore thumb, which gave some colour to my appearance. I removed the hair bun and tied it to a pony tail. I took a deep breath, let's pray that nobody notice or even recognize me! I put my hand on my chest to feel the cool metal pendant against my skin. It gave me strength. I ascended the stairs quickly and without hesitating I disappeared into a crowd that was leaving the hospital. I walked with them, keeping my face lowered and soon as they dispersed, instantly I turned into the nearby street. It was strange to walk on a paved street along numerous restaurants, hotels, shops, tea houses and billion other stuffs. I was amazed how people were so bright and welcoming. Even though I never was in Japan, everything was kept in its traditional value; the design of the houses remained in its medieval style and constantly was renovated to its best state. Many rich perfumes of fried pork and fish lingered in the air and other herbs. My mouth was watering from the temptation of Japanese food! Since I've been focusing on the shops and all, I didn't realize how much attention I was attracting. As I passed by some men neither of them could resist but to stare at me and some women as well. Either my foreign appearance was attracting their attention, or maybe my beauty! However after some point, this staring parade was freaking me out, so I turned into a nearby corner and jumped on the containers to reach the roof. Now I knew where I was… Much too close to the Hokage's building!! The carved heads of the 4 Hokages were above Tsunade's building. I sighed. Why did I wander here, when I know I could get caught here?! I changed direction and hopped from one roof to another taking a LARGE detour around the Hokage's building. I quickened my pace; after all I want to enjoy my freedom before I get locked up again for good. Today was an exceptional warm day, I think it was summer, well I guess in the Naruto world, there is always summer. The sun stood in the middle of the sky which indicated the hottest time of the day. I continued my way, hopping from one roof to another, watching my surroundings as I passed by quickly and cautiously. This village was beautiful! How life must be peaceful and calm here. I sighed to myself. I continued passing each roof, with a single jump and then I spotted a familiar building and descended the roofs to land on the rough and stony ground. With one knee resting on the ground, I stood in front of a large campus and meters away were the entrance to the building. Above the entrance hung a sign "Ninja academy". Fortunately enough, although everything was written in Japanese I could actually read it, it's as if the kanji's dissolved and transformed into English words. As I stood up and glanced around me, I spotted an area bathing underneath the shadow of the tree a swing attached to a bough. I walked towards the swing and sunk in it. This was the place, where the lonely Naruto would sit in his solitude and observe the indifferent world. I know how he feels, because I understand solitude. Still I'm amazed how he can be optimistic and motivated, regardless of his lonely life. I admire Naruto's positive thinking; I only wish I could have also his strength.

"Onee san, onee san." Called a shy voice and I raised my head and met a pair of olive green eyes. It was a girl of six years of age with blackish blue hair. She was tiny, but very cute, especially with her sparkling innocent eyes, her shy behaviour and also her adorable hair tied in two ponytails. Now that she realized she had caught my attention, she rubbed her fingers nervously against each other, clearly afraid to offend me in the manner she spoke.

"May I use the swing?" she asked me with a squeak.

A sweet smile crept over my face, this girl was so adorable. I nodded.

"Yea, take it. I only wanted to rest a bit." I said cheerfully and got up and she instantly took place on the swing. I moved out of her way and leaned with my back against the tree. Out of my eye corner I glanced down at the tiny legs jerkin around trying to find a way to make the swing sway. I heard her whimper. I turned myself to her.

"I can teach you to swing, if you like?" I suggested with a smile and her sparkling olive orbs looked at me with delight.

The way she looked at me, told me that she wasn't used to hearing this from anybody and neither from a total stranger. I kneeled down beside her and she became uncomfortably rigid.

"Don't be afraid, trust me, I'll teach you." I reassured her with a soothing smile.

The little girl hesitated for a split second, but an enthusiastic smile cracked from her face.

"Okay." She replied more openly now. I nodded. I went behind her.

"Lesson number one, first take couple of steps back till you can't anymore and then let yourself swing." I instructed her and moved aside and she complied. She swayed for several times and giggled and laughed excitedly. However it melted away, as soon as she begun to slow down.

"It's not working; it always stops swinging after a moment." She pouted disappointedly, but I kept my warm smile.

"I'm not done with teaching, have patience, there is lesson two." I told her with a wink. I kneeled down beside her again.

"Now lesson number 2. While you are swinging use your legs to increase your speed." I instructed her and she listened attentively with eyes filled with determination. I demonstrated with her legs what to do, extending them and pulling them in.

"Let's give another try, this time I'll push you and give you the orders when to extend your legs and when to pull them in." I told her and went behind her and pulled the swing backwards, not too high and let go. As she sways forward I called.

"Extend your legs and keep them like that when you fall back." Now she swung forward and was coming back and ordered. "Pull your legs back in, till you swing forward again and extend them again." She complied.

She was brilliant, normally it would take an average kid a long time to learn this, but she was an exception. She was overwhelmed with joy, as she finally realized how to swing. She giggled and laughed again with excitement. She stopped with the soles of her sandals scrapping the ground. She jumped out and hopped around excitedly.

"Thank you Onee san." She chanted and danced with triumph. I grinned at her and kneeled and rested my hand on her head.

"You are brilliant, a very clever girl. Keep up the good work and you'll become a great shinobi." I complimented her, which she responded with delighted grin.

"Yuriko, Yuriko." Emerged a voice from behind the girl and she responded by spinning around.

"Oto san, Oka san." She called happily and ran to the young couple. As she ran, she turned around and waved at me.

"Thank you Onee san." She thanked me excitedly and was welcomed in the arms of her father accompanied by her mother. The young couple happily greeted their daughter, it was a beautiful sight, and I could only sense affection in the air. Man, I hope that one day I can experience that, having kids and having a husband, who…Will never leave me. The little girl then pointed to me; apparently she spoke about me teaching her to swing. The parents looked over at me with a friendly smile and I bowed my head and returned a smile. The parents smiled back at me gratefully and turned away to leave the School campus. I sighed with content; this brought back some memories of my little sisters. It hit me like a huge boulder on my shoulders I had forgotten about them! I wonder what they are doing, if they are thinking about me or simply enjoying themselves. I sighed miserably; I do miss them, even though they are so damn annoying. I stuffed my hands into my pockets and decided to walk around the School campus. It was amazing how large the campus was, it was composed of rough, stony grounds, some patches of grass, a playing ground, but mostly filled with tools to practice the shinobi art. The recreation ground was deserted, apparently I arrived when School was finished and that would explain the girl's presence. I wandered around, trying to imagine the life of Naruto and other shinobis. I noticed the wooden poles lined in a row with markings painted on each of them. All of them bared scratches and the target sign was wearing off. In one of the Naruto episodes, when Sasuke was small I remember seeing him training to throw his shurikens. That boy… I do feel sympathy for him – despite that I don't have any particular liking for him - his life is full of misery, hatred and the thirst to avenge his clan's death. Why must they live like this? At least I know one person, who gave up on avenging his friend's death, Kakashi. That very thought struck me and briskly I turned to the academy, if I'm not mistaken there could be somebody who could report on Tsunade about me. I quickly marched away from the grounds. I knew it was foolish, it would attract a lot of attention and not to mention it was brainless to come here, there are many idiots who could report about my presence in the academy. I cursed myself, Sarah you are a problem-prone, all because you let your emotions take over you, ts, typical! Now I broke into a run and jumped into the tree and continued my interrupted journey on the roofs. I didn't know the time; I had no watch, none of my things, absolutely nothing in this world! Everything was home! Why couldn't there be an announcement before hand than at least I would have been better prepared!? I realized where I was headed now; I was going towards the training grounds, where I went last night. I landed on the last roof and descended to land on a soft lush green field. I wandered with my hands in my pockets, gazing at the nature and soon entered a forest. Only too soon, I heard objects flying, blades scraping against another and other loud movements just up ahead. Oh great! I better get out of here, otherwise I'll be sent back into that so-called "hospital prison". However, some curiosity pulled me like a magnet to that source. Swiftly and discretely I sneaked to the source and to my horror, I found Team 7. Team Kakashi. Oh, damn! I better get out of here! Nevertheless - although I was berating myself to leave - I remained rooted to the ground, hidden in the bushes. I hate to say this, but I HAD to spy on Kakashi. With him, was Sasuke, the typical avenger dude with dark hair, piercing black eyes and a cold fish look. Naruto, the bundle of energy with blond hair and blue eyes. Sakura, the pink haired girl with jade eyes and her all so annoying "Sasuke kun" girly thing. Actually what I realized, I didn't land in a specific time period in the Naruto world. The only information I collected was that Tsunade was the Hokage, Sasuke was still here and Sakura's hair is short. I watched what was going on. Naruto and Sasuke were obviously sparing and Kakashi was next to them, being the referee or so.

"Remember boys, it's only a spar, not a life and death fight." Reminded Kakashi to the both boys, who were both glaring at each other with their blades of their kunais crossing each other.

"Sasuke started it!" argued Naruto pressing himself against his kunai, hoping to shove Sasuke out of balance.

"You mean YOU started it!" corrected Sasuke with a reinforced tone.

"Oh, YEAH!?"

"Yeah!" Both boys pressed as hard as they could against each others kunai's to break through the blockade and Kakashi watched them and shook his head with a sigh.

"Guys, cut it out now. I brought you here so we can train and you are behaving like kids!" Said Kakashi with a more serious tone, the boys stopped their sparing and looked at Kakashi.

"I brought you here to test your stamina. The goal of this exercise is to increase your endurance." He announced with his hands in his pockets, but spoke to them seriously.

"I'll fight you three and you must hold out till the end, you are allowed to defend yourselves and attack me." He instructed.

"But it's impossible!" protested Naruto hopelessly.

"Why isn't it?"

"Well, remember the last time with the bells?"

"Yea, what's with that?"

"You beat US!

"And? All of you became stronger since then, so - shouldn't be a problem."

"Then don't you dare take your book out!"

"Who said I would? Unfortunately I left it home."

"What? You left it home?!"

"That is strange." Sakura's voice joined into the conversation. "You never leave it at home; you always carry it in your waist pouch."

"Does that bother you so much that I for once didn't take my favourite book with me?"

"It's awkward." Joined Sasuke coolly in the conversation. Kakashi groaned.

"So you want that I get that book to fight you?"

"NO!" shouted all three together.

"Then why you three make such a big fuss out of it, if I want to take the training seriously today?"

None of them said more; apparently all three were stunned by Kakashi's statement.

"Okay, are you ready?" he asked the three, all of them went into their fighting pose and nodded.

"Bring it on." Encouraged Naruto enthusiastically and Kakashi sighed ridiculously.

"Before we start a word of advice. Beat me faster, the sooner it ends." Said Kakashi cheerfully pulled his headgear up to reveal his Sharingan eye and the fighting begun.

I watched in awe. It was the first time I witnessed a live shinobi fight. Man, how vigilant and light footed they are, they jump and dodge so fast and lightly. This time, now that nobody was watching me or even Kakashi, I had the opportunity to study Kakashi. His style of movement was rough sometimes, but this jumps and dodges were graceful. It was impossible to even touch him; he would use genjutsu or ninjutsu to dodge the attacks. Though Sasuke was the only one to approach closely to Kakashi, he used his Sharingan to fight Kakashi off. Both are quite similar, only that Kakashi isn't as cold as Sasuke. Aaah, beautiful! I stared in admiration at Kakashi, sweat broke from his face and his silver hair glinted in the sun light. I studied his body sculpture, nice, oh very nice, firm, strong, muscular. Oh, I wonder how he is when he's ... WHAT THE HECK AM I THINKING ABOUT!! I'M WORST THAN A MAN! Already thinking of something so smutty, I must be out of my mind! I felt my face heat up; I must admit I would like to see him without a shirt. The fighting has been going on for another hour I guess, the Genins were out of breath, Sakura was on her knees at her limit. The boys were still standing both out of breath; Kakashi was still fit however there were some signs of exhaustion on his face. If he pushes his Sharingan too hard, he'll collapse any time. Somehow I got bored and decided to leave, however as I crawled back I accidentally squashed a pine cone, which painfully cracked underneath my weight. I froze and immediately something shot and planting itself against the tree trunk next to my head. I looked at the object, it was a kunai. My cheek felt wet, I thought it was my sweat, but as I drove my hand over and looked into my palm, it was my blood. I observed it with my face paling and my body feeling nauseous. I stood up and stormed over to the shinobis. My glare was fixed on a particular person, I ignored the Genins.

"Have you lost your mind?! Throwing that sharp thingy in my face! Look, what you did! You cut my face!" I shouted furiously and poked my threatening index finger on his chest, pushing him backwards.

He was quite surprised to see me and basically didn't know how to react. He held his hands in front of him, as if I was poking a gun at him.

"If that is the way you treat people, especially those watching you, I might as well make a pact with a demon and KILL YOU, for that!"

"Watching me?" he repeated with interest and I saw a smirk build underneath his mask. I felt myself blush.

"I mean, I came here spontaneously, okay! So don't get any ideas, otherwise I'll personally get them out of your head!" I snapped back with a red face. Kakashi chuckled.

"Already angry at me? You can be at least grateful that I helped you." he reminded me calmly.

"Grateful?!" I repeated with a roar "You must be joking! Should I be grateful now that you nearly killed me with a kunai?!" Kakashi sighed with irritation and looked down on me with his typical lazy look.

"Do you always overreact like this?"

"Overreact?!" I repeated outrageously. "So you call that "overreacting" Well for your information copy ninja dork, you nearly killed me, a non-shinobi, for God's sake! So of course I react like this!" Kakashi was stunned of my insults, apparently around here nobody ever dared insulting him and he sighed helplessly.

"I never planned on killing you." He added simply

"HA! My ass!" I snorted. "Then what's with the throwing?"

"I had to check if an enemy was spying on us." He gave another simple answer and I briskly grabbed him by his vest collar to pull him down to my eye level.

"Apparently you missed your target. Do me a favour, next time and aim better, then you'll definitely get rid of me." I hissed sarcastically.

Then somebody loudly cleared his throat, I turned my head over to find the three Genins staring at me and Kakashi. Naruto stared at me extremely stunned, Sasuke was absent of emotions but was surprised of my casual behaviour towards Kakashi and Sakura, she was extremely surprised. All faces of the Genin's reflected the same expression, who the heck is that woman?! I looked back at Kakashi, whose face was centimetres away from mine and briskly let go of him. With a blushed face and a nervous grin and chuckle, I turned to the Genins.

"Kakashi sensei, who is that?" was Naruto's first thing to say after watching our quarrel. Kakashi stuffed his hands into his pockets.

"A prisoner actually." He replied casually, I gave him a venomous glare. That jerk! He did enjoy blabbering out information, which doesn't concern them.

"She doesn't look like one." Mentioned Sakura thoughtfully and her jade orbs studied my appearance. I smiled at Sakura gratefully.

"No matter how innocent a person's appearance may be – their intentions can deceive you." Supplied Sasuke coolly and gave me that cold like.

"Better shut up Uchiha boy, you know nothing!" I snapped back at him and heard a faint horrified gasp coming from Sakura.

"How do you know his name?" Squeaked Sakura disbelieved and shocked of my rude behaviour. Sasuke gave me a glare.

"Nobody ever dared to insult me…"

"Well I think that's what you need, Mister I'm-oh-so-cool-with-my-Sharingan, who cannot digest the fact that somebody is stronger then you!" I interrupted him sharply. Successfully I poured oil on the fire, but realized that the reality of getting beaten up to a bloody pulp was soon becoming true. His body language became rigid and his fist clenched and I felt his angry aura streaming out of him. He gritted his teeth; his cold eyes became sharp with the desire to beat me up and soon after his Sharingan appeared. I seriously have to shut my mouth next time and control my temper, because this dude can be damn strong when he's angry! Then a hand rested on Sasuke's shoulder, he eyed his sensei.

"If I were you, I wouldn't waste your time with her; she may have a loose trap, but she hasn't got the brains or the capacity to fight." Suggested Kakashi, Sasuke calmed down and gave a snort and crossed his arms over his chest. I flashed a glare at Kakashi.

"I do have the brains, but the fighting I'm still working on it!" I retorted bitterly with my arms crossed over my chest and sticking the tongue out.

"Already one Naruto is enough." Muttered Kakashi disdainfully.

"What?" was the sharp response of Naruto; Kakashi chuckled nervously and laughed in his lazy manner.

"Now if you don't mind, I'll leave." I added curtly and turned away from Kakashi's team.

As I walked several meters away from them, suddenly when I was looking away I bumped with my head into something soft yet hard, but warm. I looked up to find Kakashi's face. I leaped back with a yelp and heated face. This guy actually had appeared just like that in front of me, despite that I saw him a second ago behind me!

"Don't do that ever again Kakashi!"

A chuckle came from his part and he begun to pace forward and I would pace back.

"Sara, you can't go anywhere - after all - you are a prisoner."

Then I felt three sharp things poke against my back. I found to my great irritation the Genin's poking their kunais against my back, showing their readiness to prevent my flight.

"Shit." I muttered with irritation.

I was trapped how wonderful! I need to get out of this situation and fast - I don't want to go back to that damn hospital!

"I wonder, does Konoha have the reputation of treating foreigners like lab rats?" I questioned Kakashi irritably. I felt one of the kunai's poking soften up, and I knew that it was from Naruto.

"Or that they lock them up for weeks, let them rot in a damn hospital room and senselessly interrogate them although every shred of proof tells that the foreigner is innocent!"

"Konoha isn't like that, it's only out of security measures that they..." Naruto corrected me sharply, but I scoffed at his statement.

"Security measures? Do I look like a threat? I am like an ant that is likely to get squashed, only because I have a different appearance!"

I sighed and rubbed my exhausted eyes with the tip of my fingers.

"I admire Konoha, I've been hearing only the best things about it, but now I realized how cold hearted and unwelcoming they are. You bunch of pretentious shinobis will never understand my kind! What is the problem with you people, when a simple civilian wants to become a shinobi? Instantly you accuse them for being a spy, or one of Orochimaru's followers. At least my home doesn't make me pass tests, as if I was a disease. You have absolutely no right to lock me up, only because I know Konoha." I declared firmly.

I couldn't feel the sharp blades against my back anymore; it was quiet all around me. Kakashi was very pensive about my statement, it was very unusual for me to see him like this, and it was a new side of Kakashi that I've never seen before. Then I instantly sensed some chakara approaching with a sound of some rustling of leaves, then in a puff of white clouds appeared several masked Anbus.

"Ah, sempai you caught her." Mentioned the main Anbu, who was the only one not wearing his cloak. "Hokage sama sends us to get her."

"Well, you found me, so take me." I stated indifferently and walked over to them, they were confused of my sudden surrender, and obviously they were expecting some resistance. I had my back turned to the Team Kakashi and ignored their stares. I outstretched my arms in front of me with my wrist on top of the other.

"Go on, take me." I encouraged them and they did so and tied my wrists behind my back.

They grabbed a hold of my shoulder and we vanished in a puff of white smoke. Within minutes I was back into my hospital room, but this time was gravely welcomed by Gai, Asuma, Kurenai and the all so annoying Tsunade. The Anbu disappeared as they untied my wrists. Another puff of smoke appeared and there was the silver haired nin, remaining as casual as usual. Tsunade walked over to me in powerful steps.

"The hospital reported back to me about your disappearance, they say you disguised yourself as one of my nurses." She stated strongly. "That you even managed to slip past my medic Nins without being noticed impresses me."

"I think I have talent with disguising myself." I replied curtly.

"Don't joke around with me!" she barked, her eyes narrowing. "Your actions were foolish; if you had made a wrong move, believe me you would have been dead!"

It all made sense now! The absence of Kakashi's perverted book and throwing that bloody kunai at me was actually all planed! I flashed a glare at Kakashi, who remained unresponsive. Tsunade glared at me.

"If you do anything foolish, whatsoever, you'll be killed straight away and if you leave Konoha you'll be killed as well." She threatened me and I remained calm.

"That sounds fair, now if you don't mind, I need some rest." I uttered with a yawn, but was instantly grabbed by my collar. Tsunade pulled me to her face.

"How dare you speak to me like this? I want to know what you were up?" she demanded.

"She was with me." Answered Kakashi calmly without looking at me, her grip loosened around my collar.

"Kakashi, was she really with you?"

"Affirmatively Tsunade sama. She was simply walking around Konoha, dropping by at the academy and then she joined my Team." Informed Kakashi calmly.

So that jerk was actually spying on me the whole time?! This is mad! Tsunade looked at Kakashi, checking that he wasn't lying and she gave up with a sigh.

"I can say you are lucky that Kakashi had an eye on you." Hissed Tsunade. Everybody left the room including Kakashi. Finally peace at last! I changed myself back into my trainers from the hospital and lay down on my bed. I was extremely exhausted, although I didn't do much physically; I think this chakara thing is making me exhausted. My eye lids became heavier and within minutes, at 6 PM I fell into a peaceful slumber.


	5. Chapter 4

ENJOY!! GO SEXY KAKASHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!

* * *

**CHAPTER FOUR**

**- Everything was settled until another challenge appears -**

I woke up the next morning at the sound of birds chirping and the blazing sun rays. I glanced at the watch mounted on the wall, 6 AM. With a yawn I stretched myself and got out of bed to do some stretching. After 12 hours of sleep I felt like newly born, so with great enthusiasm I grabbed my so-called invented shinobi clothes and headed to the shower. I came out ten minutes later humming a tune and combing my wet hair straight. I opened the sliding window to enjoy the morning air; it was still chilly with the scent of fresh dew lingering in the air. The sun was peeking over the hill giving an orangey horizon. The village still bathed in the morning mist. Konoha was not fully awake yet, but as the first sun rays poured down into the village, illuminating every corner, Konoha came to life. Already some noises were created, the sound of battering of objects on a construction site and the movement of people. I bent over the ledge to rest my arms on it to stare in the distance. Konoha was simply beautiful in the morning. I don't know how long I've been standing there admiring the view. Now whole Konoha was busy and noisy. The door behind me instantly slid open and I turned around to be encountered by two Anbu guards.

"Hokage sama wants to speak to you in her office." Informed the Anbu briefly.

"We'll accompany you." Supplied the other and I simply nodded.

I walked over to them and exited the room with the two Anbus following me closely. What can I do? If I would refuse, something bad will happen, but if I go I may solve this issue. As we reached a spacious area in the hospital building, both Anbu guards each grabbed my shoulders and we disappeared in a puff of smoke. In a split second I landed behind the door of Tsunade's office.

"Come in." her voice barked and I entered her office.

To my astonishment I found Kakashi nearby, leaning lazily against the ledge of the open window behind Tsunade's desk. His serious gaze was fixed on her, looks like they spoke about something before. Tsunade exchanged a last look with Kakashi obviously verifying that he understood her and then her eyes met mine. Her sharp finger nail from her index finger pointed to the chair in front of her desk.

"Sit." She ordered me and I complied. Tsunade folded her hands, cleared her throat and looked at me.

"I had a discussion with Kakashi yesterday about you."

"…" I didn't respond, neither did I feel it was necessary to do so and her irritable mood, forced me to keep my mouth shut.

"Yes, we discussed about what you said some days ago, when we interrogated you. Do you still have any interest in becoming a shinobi?"

"Yes, of course!" I spoke out, flooded with hope.

"Good. We drew a conclusion; you are released from our custody."

I observed her with disbelief and slowly grew conscious that it was good news.

"However on one condition, never leave Konoha."

EHHHH?! What-what is she talking about?!

"If you dare set foot outside without anybody accompanying you, you'll go without a trial to prison."

Her severe attitude didn't surprise but all this seemed suspicious to me. How would I react if suddenly a total stranger pops up in my village and asks to be a shinobi? My reaction would be no different.

"I accept it." I agree to Tsunade's offer; however a thought began to preoccupy me.

"Tsunade sama, I don't have a place to stay, where can I find one?"

"Yes, now that we are coming to this point. First of all you'll need a teacher and evidently a place to stay. Do you have any specific person in mind?"

"Well, no."

KAKASHI, OF COURSE!! Tsunade looked at me while contemplating over something and then she readjusted herself on her chair.

"That settles it." She said relaxed and then looked at Kakashi. "You'll do it."

"Whaat?! With him/her?!" mingled our protestation, then we exchanged a glare as we heard each other's reaction.

I crossed my arms over my chest and turned away with a contemptuous "hum!" He remained calm, but I could he was just as irritated as me.

"You say, Kakashi?! Does he even have the capacity NOT to throw kunais "at random" and pick fights "at random" too!?" I snapped.

"Hey, let me remind you that you started the fight in the hospital." corrected Kakashi with a lazy tone, though I could hear a hint of his infuriation.

"Okay, Kakashi, maybe I did, but what about the kunai thing?"

"I didn't know you were there."

"HA! Very funny, you did it on purpose because you knew I was hiding in the bushes! You stalker!"

"Just for your information I wasn't stalking, it's spying. It's comforting to know that behind that loose trap of yours is a brain."

"QUIET!!" Bellowed Tsunade with such intensity that both Kakashi and I were blown away and pressed against the wall, we stared fearfully at her.

Her nails dug into the wooden desk of hers, scratching the surface of it and she glared at both of us.

"Stop the constant quarrelling!" she snapped "Both of you behave like kids!" She abruptly rose from her chair and grabbed Kakashi's arm and mine and dragged us out of the room, to throw us out of her office into the corridor. With her hands now on her hips, she glowered down on us.

"I'm proud of my choice at least it'll save me some trouble." Her eyes rested on Kakashi.

"By the way Kakashi - have fun."

She slammed the door shut in front of our faces. Both of us stood there staring at the door, unable to believe what actually just happened. A long and hopeless sigh escaped from Kakashi's clothed face.

"You are something." He muttered and turned away and walked.

I stood there and clenched my fists with guilt, since when was I that rebellious? I never in my life reacted to such extent neither at home, in public or at School. Either my character has changed in this manga or simply I just don't care anymore of people's responses.

"Are you coming?" Called Kakashi's voice which interrupted my thoughts.

I looked over at him, the reality that he wasn't happy to have me around, was kind of painful despite that he's so annoying. I joined him and we walked along the corridor. I followed him quietly. None of us spoke. As we stepped out of the building, I had the strongest urge to tell him something, but I kept my mouth shut afraid that I would end up in an argument. Kakashi walked casually along the crowded street of Konoha, he seemed at ease with himself and somehow appeared to be ignoring me.

"From this day on, I'm your teacher and you're my student." He finally said.

"As a student you'll have to obey to my orders. You'll have to work hard. The crash course to a shinobi will be hard on both of us. The requirements are, mental, spiritual and physically stability and endurance, without it you won't achieve to be a shinobi. This is going to be hell."

However he stopped in his tracks turned back to me and looked down in my eyes.

"Are you sure you want to follow this crash course?"

I looked at Kakashi; I never really gave a thought about what I might be expecting. Killing and dying might be one of the factors which I probably would like to avoid, but I don't have a choice, haven't I? I'm sure there is a reason for my purpose in the Naruto World.

"Why do you doubt me? Isn't my presence in Konoha a proof? That my decision is absolute?"

I couldn't detect whether he was satisfied or not of my reply. His response was to turn his back on me and walk.

"If you want a smooth cooperation then listen to this. If you respect me, I'll respect you, but if you don't I won't either." He instructed, ignoring my response to his previous question.

"Kakashi, uhm, I mean, Kakashi sensei."

"Yes."

"Are you only going to be my teacher?"

No response came.

"Your discussion with Tsunade was about getting me somebody that not only can teach, right? But to also keep an eye on me. I suppose you'd have to report to Tsunade every time about me." While he walked in the middle of the busy street of Konoha, he turned his head aside.

"You know, why don't you drop your pretences of being ignorant of Konoha?"

My heart stopped. I bit my lip, holding back a swear word. This guy was just too perceptive, but I have to slither out of this without raising any suspicion.

"What are you talking about? I'm not pretending! If you are still under the belief that I am a spy, than you might as well tell me, why I would risk my ASS to get an actual training from one of the top shinobis, who is so damn unpredictable and life threatening?! I'm educated but not brain damaged to recognise those procedures." I protested to Kakashi, who acknowledged my statement with mixed expressions.

"So I guess you are still a student?"

"Where do you get that assumption?"

"You sound like one."

I looked at him with a scowl, was that supposed to be an insult or a compliment?

"So what if I am."

"How old are you?"

"What's this personal interrogation?!" I demanded and he eyed me, clearly expecting the answer and I growled.

"Eighteen."

Kakashi's eyes nearly popped out of his skull.

"You're eighteen?" he repeated with surprise and observed me intently, not convinced of my response.

I blushed at his examining gaze and retorted.

"And?! What have you been expecting? An' old granny?!"

Kakashi showed some amusement and waved off my last statement.

"No not at all, I expected you to be older, you know, since your body can be mistaken for a mature woman."

This guy is clueless about his manner of speech, he unconsciously insults people.

"If you haven't noticed women's bodies mature faster than men's, Baka." I muttered with contempt.

Finally I noticed the complaints from the bye passers; we were actually standing in the middle of the busy street of Konoha.

"It's a common fact; it's just that your character does not suit your appearance."

The anger that I held back exploded like a volcano eruption.

"Will you stop insulting me! You've got no idea what kind of shit is coming out of your mouth!" I roared and caused all the people nearby to gasp with horror and stare at me.

I didn't give a damn about what the villagers thought about me, but this guy must hear for himself what kind of insults he's letting out. Kakashi showed some surprise to my statement and not to mention at my vulgar tone. He also didn't care about the people around us; his gaze was fixed on me.

"Didn't know you could react so strong to my words-

-Duh! I can if people continuously insult me!"

Kakashi appeared to be finally satisfied and turned his back on me and walked on.

"Come along, otherwise you'll get lost." He added and with a muffled growl I stomped along behind him.

I followed him around with a sullen mood. This guy was driving me crazy! What's the point of picking on me, does he enjoy making people so angry? After walking through some streets and turning into some other streets, he slowed down his pace and headed to shabby apartment building. We ascended the stairs and walked through a dirty narrow corridor with doors along it. We stopped in front of one of them; he rummaged through his pockets to pull out his keys and stuck them into the lock. He turned them unlocking it and stepped into the flat. I entered a small flat, mostly made of wooden floors and white walls. Right on my right was the doorway to the small kitchen and opposing it was the living room. An olive green carpet stretched out beneath the two dark couches grouped in the middle of the room around a glass table and facing a television. He didn't bother getting more furnitures, it was quite empty his place, very spacious and even lacking vitality. At the end of the hallway was his room, because he entered it and next to it, was the bathroom. Now that I studied his place, it felt very depressing and dull; his flat was composed of dark furnitures and nothing colourful, his flat was crying for more colours. In some areas, the cement wall had cracks, which stood out against the white walls. What actually amazed me was that his place was very clean, for an average man. I don't know if it's maybe the Japanese culture that influenced the people to be neat or is it just a perfectionist habit. I stepped into the kitchen, it was tiny, but useful for a single person. Again everything was based of dark furnitures, seriously is Kakashi an addict to dark colours? I would feel depressed with such dark colours. Actually I never saw his apartment, in the episodes they only reveal his bed room, which is usually stacked up with all his stuff and even some furnitures. Then I stepped into the living room and sunk into the nearby chair, I leaned my back and closed my eyes for a moment. I still cannot believe that Kakashi is real that even the Naruto world is real and that I am living it. The whole place smelled like Kakashi, which made my heart skip a beat. I heard his footsteps and snapped out of my reverie to meet his appearance; he had taken off his olive green vest and wore a black tank shirt matching his clothed face and pants. I swallowed uncomfortably at the sight of his strong arms; on one side tattooed in his skin was the Anbu insignia. SO HOT!!

"What is it?"

I was embarrassed enough that I started to blush, so I merely glanced at him briefly.

"N-n-nothing. I was just looking at that tattoo of yours; I suppose you were an Anbu, right?" I stammered with a nervous chuckle.

He raised his eye brow in confusion, clearly thinking that I was bizarre.

"Yea, I was part of it, for some time." His reply didn't seem that proud.

Then he sat down on the single couch next to me with his legs parted and rested his elbows on his laps and observed me with that typical lazy look.

"This morning I checked for a place for you, however since you have no money and aren't originally from here – you don't have the legal right to own an apartment." He told me in a matter-of-factly tone.

Integrating into this village will be hell and I'm already feeling it now.

"However, as you noticed that my mission is to supervise you, I can't put you somewhere out of my sight. So to simplify it, you'll have to stay here - with me." He concluded with simplicity.

My mouth dropped open and I jumped up, unable to utter a word. Yeah, "stay here with me" he casually says, he seriously has no idea what he's getting himself into! HELL. I can predict that this will end with a nose bleed, killed or being kicked out of this flat.

"Sara, is there a problem?" This time I looked at him with a red face and appearing more horrified than I had planned.

"No, of course, not at all! Like I wouldn't be disturbed about the fact that, I'll live be SHARING an apartment with a MAN!" I retorted with a thick layer of sarcasm.

"Oh, right, I forgot about that."

"What, you forgot?! That is THE most obvious thing in the world!"

"He he. Sorry, about that, it's been years since I've been around a woman."

"Oh, go away. Don't tell me you've been living with men or what?"

"Yea, I have."

I turned away, slapping my hands over my cheeks. OH NO, KAKASHI'S GAY!!

Kakashi noticed my discomfort and tilted his head in confusion.

"Are you gay?" I asked him timidly. Kakashi face begun to brighten up and there cracked a typical hilarious laugh from his mouth. He slapped his knees in laughter, that guy was going berserk, it's like it was the best joke he heard in years. Also it was the first time I saw him laugh openly. I think I was about to laugh my ass off too, but when I realized that he was laughing at my question, I felt insulted. The anger bubbled inside me and now it burst.

"Are you, yes or no!" I demanded with my arms crossed over my chest. Kakashi calmed himself down. Suddenly he surprised me with a penetrative and provocative look which made my heart skip several beats, a look that guarantees all girls to melt down.

"No." was his reply.

He should stop doing that, otherwise I'll faint. I kept my composure. I looked at him indifferently.

"Good."

"Why, "Good"?"

"Uhm…Just like that!"

That guy still gave me that playboy look, which made it more difficult to hide my blush.

"Now will you stop, staring at me with that look of yours?" I snapped and Kakashi's eyes went wide.

"You are blushing."

This wasn't helping.

"Is my look that irresistible?"

"It's not!"

"Oh, man you actually like my look."

"Shut up! I don't!"

"It's written all over your face."

"Be quiet! I'll show you what I can write on your face!" I waver my fists in front of me.

"You have the physical qualities to make all the girls blush and it just caught my off guard, okay!" Then only seconds later when Kakashi replied with an amused "Thank you." I realized what kind of nonsense I babbled.

"Man! Why do you get everything wrong?" I shouted and crossed my arms over my chest and sulked.

"It's you who got it wrong."

- Anyway let's forget about the whole thing shall we?" He quickly added as he saw my face swelling with rage and I nodded at his sensible request with a sharp look. Kakashi sighed deeply and got up from the couch.

"You are such a pain." He sighed and stuffed his hands in his pockets and exited the living room casually.

"If you need me, I'll be in my room - feel yourself at home." Kakashi disappeared from my view and the creaking and closing of the door followed. I loosened my arms and fell back on the couch and a long deep sigh escaped my mouth. I make blunders after blunders, why can't I be a bit more careful? I barely recognize myself, what the heck happened to me, or actually who am I in the Naruto world? What is my purpose here? I clenched my fist furiously to only smack them hard on the leather couch. Why was I being such an asshole!! I groaned and got up to head to Kakashi's door. As I stood in front of the wooden door, I hesitated, should I go in and tell him what I have been planning to tell him in the past hour or just go sulk in a corner? Somehow I bet that Kakashi will either kick me out or bicker some more and finally we will get ourselves involved in a deathly fight.

"Are you planning on standing there forever, contemplating whether you should come in or not?" Called Kakashi's casual voice from behind his door. I shrunk back startled of his sudden remark.

Seriously I shouldn't be startled about this, what can you expect from a top Nin, he heard or sensed me coming. I guess nothing can surprise him, which is such a pity. I took a deep breath and grabbed the door handle and opened the door. I found a wood covered room, floor, ceiling and walls, everything made of wood, including the furnitures. I felt like stepping into an attic, where dusty furnitures were nicely arranged and where the sun beams filtered through the smeared window to illuminate the entire room. I could see dust particles floating in the air. Maybe Kakashi was tidy; maybe even a perfectionist, except for the care of his room. The room was squared and spacious enough for one simple person like Kakashi. His room had a desk, a closet and a dresser, nothing else; his night table was the ledge of the window. Below the ledge was his bed, which guaranteed blazing sun beams every morning when he woke up. An olive green blanket with the repetitive shuriken patterns stretched all over the blanket and his bed was cushioned with a nice fluffy white pillow. On the ledge there were two picture frames and an alarm clock, one picture was his old team picture with Yondaime as his sensei and next to it was his Team, team 7 with Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura.

"Have you finished inspecting my room?" Mentioned Kakashi and I looked at him and found him staring at me lazily with that orange book in his hand.

His gaze then sunk back into his book and I glowered down on it, it seemed he has forgotten my presence by now, how typical. What is so fun about that perverted book anyway!

"That would explain why you don't have a woman." I mumbled with contempt.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"If you came her to criticise me, then get out." I was slightly taken aback, when he pronounced his last sentence sharply and fell into a vulnerable state of mind. My gaze lowered to the floor and I bit my lip, to prevent myself from getting too emotional.

"I'm sorry. Sorry for all the things I said since the beginning." I mumbled and turned away to exit the room and soundlessly closed the door shut after me. I felt my eyes stinging; quickly I need to distract myself before I cry out. I spotted the kitchen, there were dirty and clean dishes lying around and pots and all sort of things. Horrified by the dirtiness I started washing dishes and putting them away in the cupboards. It dawned to me that this won't be an easy time for me, for some strange reasons I'm rebellious with Kakashi and when he's not around I'm not. It must be something related to my feelings that make me like this. However now I don't want to think, nor talk or even look at him - I want to be alone - like always. A tear trickled down my face and I forcefully wiped it away, but no matter how hard I tried to wipe them away they kept on flowing down my cheeks. Why do these damn things exist! Tears! They are only an embarrassment and humiliation! I put away the last dish and pot. I leaned against the counters and took a deep breath and exhaled shuddering breath. I must calm myself down. No time to cry over itsy bitsy stuff like that! I wiped my face clean, but still felt that my eyes were stinging and threatening to shed more tears. I peeked out of the kitchen; no sign of Kakashi, the whole flat was quiet. I tiptoed to the entrance, put my sandals back on and noiselessly exited the apartment. I ran down the hallway and descended the stairs; I need a quiet place, a place where I won't be disturbed. I reached the bottom in front of the apartment building and hopped on several things to reach the roof. It was in the late afternoon, the sun nearly finished his whole journey through the sky and the sky begun to change from a blue to purple and pink. However a loud thunder emitted from the black clouds, running like a stamped over the sky to cover up everything and the wind gave speed to those clouds. I swallowed hard not to cry out here, so I quickened my pace and landed with each foot step on different roofs. The journey was very short, because I reached the lake earlier then I expected. I landed roughly on the ground, staggering to the shore panting strongly and collapsing on my knees. Tears flowed freely down my cheeks and the misery overcame me. I panted with exhaustion at my angry burst, the thunder clapped over my head and a droplet of rain splattered on the back of my hand. Within minutes it was raining. Then I slammed my fists furiously on the wet moss. I'm pathetically weak! Why when I want to change myself I end up in a miserable state like this! Why is my life like this? Full of complication, frustration, anger, misery and depression, why is this? This pain will never cease and I thought and prayed by coming here it would change, apparently I was wrong. I want to go home now! Please I want to go, I've learned my lesson, please take me home! I want to see my family again! I don't want to be alone no more! Then a strong hand rested on my shoulder and abruptly I pulled away out of startle and fell with my behind in the shallow water. I stared at the familiar figure in front of me and instantly diverted my gaze to the shallow bottom of the lake, avoiding eye contact. I pulled my legs up and crossed them and bent my back forwards, not wanting to look at him. I wiped my face clean with the back of my forearm. There was a moment of silence. What did he want now? To scold me for running away or to kill me instead?

"Are you crazy to go out here? You know you're out of Konoha's boundaries, you could've been killed by now." His voice grew to a serious scold, who reflected his teacher mode again, it irritated me so much.

"Better getting killed than suffering like this." I mumbled

"What!"

I looked up at him, giving him a glare and took a deep angered breath.

"I prefer getting killed than enduring such treatment!" I reiterated with a strong voice. I bit my lip to prevent myself from spilling any tears, however it didn't work and it came down with a flow.

"You have no idea what I went through in my life! I'm holding a grudge to the world only, because I never fit in and am never accepted. I'm sick and tiered of it! Why do people judge me before knowing me? Why does everybody hate me that much?" Kakashi was very quiet, either he didn't know how to react in those delicate moments, or either he's looking down on me pitifully. I only kept my eyes fixed to the shallow waters in front of me, avoiding his eye contact. He must be thinking that I'm weak and an embarrassment to the shinobi nations. I stood up and turned my back on him.

"I know how you feel." He muttered. "My life hasn't been any better and there are many of us who lived like this. The best what we could do is hold on another and comfort each other."

Why did his comfort irritate me? My mind was just yelling, telling him to shut up! I clenched my fists and abruptly turned back to him.

"Shut up already, I don't want to hear things from a liar like you!" I shouted at him and he looked at me confused.

"Tell me how many times you have repeated this? "I know how you feel and there are many of us" Or maybe have you learned this by heart, like recital without emotions behind it? This is only a thing that a teacher would say if he or she doesn't know what to say!"

It looks like I caught Kakashi off guard with my statement and seriously I was the one winning here! His hand remained in his pockets and he stared at me unable to utter a word, despite that he kept his emotionless and lazy face.

"And like you know my life? I certainly don't know yours and I bet you cannot compare them! That's what you people do always compare: compare thoughts; lives; techniques; styles and everything! To understand another person's life, you have to live theirs!"

I panted at my outburst, Kakashi still remained stiff and absent of emotions. My clenched fists trembled at the look of Kakashi's appearance. Why can't he show his emotions, why doesn't he react, why is he so cold? I took a deep breath closing my eyes and opening them again.

"Kakashi; I can tell by a blink of the eye that you suffered tremendously. I'm gifted in this department, so better not give me any lecturers about YOU knowing all of this "touchy, softy, feelings" Which you consider as inhumane!"

Kakashi's eyes widened, but then returned back to his indifferent and lazy look, as if he didn't give a damn about what I just said. I stormed up to him and tried to punch Kakashi, but like expected he caught my wrists with a firm grip; looking down on me with that impassive face of his. I struggled to pull my wrists free from his grip- but no success- he was too strong. I was angry at him, at myself and at this world. Never once in my life can I avoid pain, I have always been confronting it everywhere, and it is as if I'm cursed with it. I gave in and let my arms dangle from Kakashi's grip. I lowered my gaze.

"Why are you so cold? Why don't you respond?" I mumbled. The crashing of the rain filled the emotional silence. Finally a sigh came from him.

"I don't know how to react in those situations any more, although I'm familiar with them. I've been raised like this. Life as a shinobi is different then what you heard and it can be called a "black chapter" in a human's life. We are taught to restrain our emotions and feelings, believing that it becomes a weakness to us in fights and to our opponents; we become tools or killing machines forgetting are humanness." I looked at Kakashi, in his one eye there was a hint of melancholy.

Why was I thinking that he doesn't feel a thing? He does apparently, just he's forbidden to show it, I'm such a jackass. His grip around my wrists loosened and became softer, as if he was proving to me that he could be gentle and caring if he wanted to.

"I envy you. You are very human. You are caring and sensitive, which is a gift for us shinobis that lost this ability to feel."

I was somewhat amazed and speechless by his statement, did he seriously mean that? Because I have the feeling that another Kakashi emerged in front of me, a warm and caring person, which to some extent freaked me out but at the same time entranced me. I felt like I was going off the story since some time now, I'm experiencing new sides of the characters and it was extremely unpredictable and startling. Now I felt like I landed in a drama and that Kakashi was another man, a stranger speaking to me in a warm matter under the pouring rain. I still could not cope with this and just bluntly stared at him. Then finally he let go of my hands.

"I'm so sorry- I didn't mean to- I mean." I spluttered desperately, trying to apologize which failed extremely.

"Don't apologize. I think I might have reacted the same way."

Hot tears sprouted from my eyes, how can he be so nice to me? Even though I argued bitterly with him and annoyed him so much, why, I don't understand?

"I'm sorry – I'm sorry - I." I sobbed heavily.

A short chuckle came from Kakashi, his eye crinkled and a smile was visible underneath his mask, revealing his cheerful face. Then he rested his hand on my head, lowered his face till we were on the same eye level, like a typical brotherly comfort.

"Just take it easy for now. Anyway I'll be keeping you company till you become a shinobi." He said with his usual joyful tone.

I nodded and wiped my face clean with the back of my palm and smiled at him gratefully. He stood up straight and pulled his hand back. The rain was stopping and the dark clouds were moving away, revealing the early starlight sky. I don't know what overcame me but I suddenly threw my arms around Kakashi and hugged him tightly.

"Thank you so much." I thanked him with all my heart.

Only then I realized when I nuzzled his chest that he was reacting very uncomfortably stiff. His arms fell loosely on his sides and his breath slightly hitched at our body contact. Don't tell me he was uncomfortable or disgusted. With a reddening face I drew myself back - undoing my arms around him and stepping back- what my eyes met seriously startled me. His uncovered eye was wide, shocked as if he was unfamiliar with that friendly gesture of mine, or basically that he never knew that gesture before. It was the first time I saw him like this, extremely out of place, disturbed, thoughtful and speechless. Has he never experienced a friendly hug or an affectionate hug – well uhm- anyway I'm confused myself of what I did just now. The icy embarrassing moment frustrated me enormously, so I rested my hands on my hips and looked at him with a scowl.

"Oh, get a grip of yourself!" I snapped with discontent, "it's not like you've hugged a skunk or something!" Finally Kakashi's lazy expression kicked back.

"You caught me off guard, there." He said with a chuckle and scratched the back of his head. My eyes went wide with disbelief as I found the solution.

"You never been hugged before?" I spluttered with utter disbelief and he looked at me, as if that was the most retarded statement in the world.

"Don't jump to conclusions, I have my fair shares with women, so I do know what a "hug" is." he stated flatly.

"Fair shares with women? Why is that you haven't got any?" I repeated with amusement.

He looked at me again with that lazy look of his; however there was this unusual glint in his eyes which predicted mischief.

"Are you so anxious to know about my love life?"

I looked at him for a moment and turned brick red at the realization of the true topic and shook my head violently.

"N-n-no thank, I pr-prefer not to know." I rejected frantically his forward statement and backed away from him.

Kakashi chuckled at my nervous state, and then he regressed back to his serious self.

"Don't misinterpret what happened before, but what happened back there caught me off guard, and I'm not used to that stuff, for the moment." He explained concisely.

I can't imagine living without love- I would be dead by now! I can say that the Mangaka had great ideas regarding the shinobi techniques, fighting style and so, but this world is lacking of love, like I thought about mine. How can you live in a world without love? How can Kakashi endure this pain, which I cannot imagine? The Mangaka clearly did no think about this; he created the characters and forced them to live with sufferance. I feel like embracing this world to give this warmth when I'm with my family. A moment of silence followed as I fell in deep contemplation.

"I think we should go we're both drenched." suggested Kakashi and I followed him to the nearby tree branch and hopped from one to another. As we travelled through the thick and dark forest under complete silence I decided to ask him something.

"Did you have a girlfriend or do you have one?" I asked him and as he jumped from branch to the other, he looked at me with his eye brow arched in surprise. What? Did I say something wrong again?

"Didn't you say that you didn't want to know about my love life?" He inquired with interest and my reply was to look away with a red face.

"What about you?"

"I don't believe you want to have an insight into my love life either, so I'll spare you."

"Okay Sara, but tell me, where is this question leading to? It's not like it is of any importance?" Out of anxiety I misplaced my foot on the bough, which nearly brought me to trip but I managed to keep my balance. Shit, it was deep in the shit and I knew that! I just hope I don't blush. Then his eye widened followed with a loud "AHA!" and he stared at me.

"I knew it! You are showing some interest in me!" I slapped my hand against my forehead with a loud infuriating groan.

"It's incredible, how you men, misunderstand situations like this, only because somebody asks you if you have a girlfriend or had one, you conclude that the person likes you."

Then a sly grin displayed on my face and I eyed him, I proudly hopped from one bough to another.

"By the way, didn't you equally ask me that question? So it equally means that you have some interest in me."

The reaction that followed clearly knocked me down and drastically changed my opinion on him.

"Sorry too ugly for me."

"WHAAT?!" I roared at him. "You little piece of shit! Who's ugly?! Certainly you!"

"Whoa, such a bad mouth for a woman of your age and also insulting your teacher! My, where are your manners? I'm your sensei, so please speak appropriately."

"Hey! Don't order me around; I can speak however I want!"

"Sheesh! That type of women I don't like."

"What did you say?"

"I mean that very masculine type of women freak me out!"

"Well I'm certainly not masculine!"

"Oh yes you are!"

"Hell not!"

"Only men swear like you! Obviously you come from a different culture, but around here, if you swear a lot, you'll be considered as woman who lost its feminine side." I listened to his idiotic statement to the point that I exploded.

"Well for your information, the women in Konoha are whimps! All of them are bunch of pussies who are constantly obsessed by their image to impress men, instead of training! Why can't women have the right to be rude and rebellious, whereas men are always allowed to everything! This is totally sexist!" Kakashi stared at me, somewhat offended that I insulted the Konoha women and somewhat surprised maybe even impressed by my outburst. Then I neared him and eyed him gravely.

"Remember this; I'm NOT like those women whose focus is only on their image. If I have a goal I'm hard working and determined to reach it and will overcome any obstacle." I pronounced each syllable sternly and clearly that I basically made Kakashi lean away from me.

Then I took my distance between both of us and looked straight in front of me. I didn't know that Kakashi would be so damn annoying and it took me only a week to find it out! My mouth just opened thundering critical remarks.

"Let's bet you like women who are appealing, right? Or more submissive I would say. Those who have nice curves, big boobs, a big ass, who are sensual by all means and can easily, sate your lust!"

Again I made Kakashi horrified - well sorry he's got to live with this – though it seems I made him steadily angry, but I could tell that I did hit the spot. Before letting Kakashi speak I added some oil to the fire.

"Why do you try to defend yourself, when you are reading that perverted book from Jiraya that reflects those erotic things?" I heard an aggravating growl from Kakashi.

"You are the most complicated woman I've ever met in my entire life! You are critical over every single thing; you are disrespectful, arrogant, and judgemental and get on everybody's nerves!" I listened to his angry statement and grew angry as well, but before I could intervene he added strongly and bitterly another sentence.

"With that behaviour of yours, no wonder that you never had a boyfriend!"

Like a mirror shattering into bitts, I bit my trembling under lip, preventing myself from shedding any more tears and watched with shock at the sliver figure taking the lead in front of me. I began to hate that guy. Okay, if he wants war, I'll give him one! I won't be nice, but will nail my beak shut to prevent myself from saying anything stupid anymore and believe me he'll be begging for me to change! I clenched my fists tightly and we continued our travel through the woods.


	6. Chapter 5

ENJOY, ENJOY, ENJOY!! YAAAAAAAYY!!

* * *

**CHAPTER FIVE**

- The wrong time to live with an idiot-

Twenty minutes later, we arrived on the roof of Kakashi's apartment and we descended to his balcony and entered his flat through the unlocked window. He switched on the light and we were in the living room. I took off my sandals and set them at the entrance. I really wasn't pleased about the fact that I would be sharing the apartment with my arch enemy that I would like to strangle!

"I can sleep in the living room." I suggested with a calm voice to Kakashi from the entrance. No sound came, but then he appeared in the hallway looking at me and I tried as much as I can to avoid direct eye contact with him.

"No you'll sleep in my bed. Anyway I prefer the couch." He told me and I didn't reply showing that I agreed.

"I would like to take a shower if that is possible?" I asked him again with a calm voice and keeping my face serious.

"The towels you'll find in the cupboards and in a white plastic bag there are some things for you."

"Thank you." I muttered and walked passed him to the bathroom. When I reached the door:

"Sara." Called Kakashi and I turned around catching a blackish blue shirt, which I instantly recognized that it was part of the Jounin outfit. It was especially recognisable through its orangey red patches of swirls on the arms of the sleeves. I looked at Kakashi, somewhat confused.

"This can be your pyjamas for tonight, and then tomorrow we can get you some clothes and other things." He explained to me and I nodded quietly this time without even looking at him.

I retreated into the bathroom, locked it up and leaned against the door. I sighed deeply, I just want to go to bed and sleep till I die. I examined the bathroom, it was relatively crammed, but enough for one person to live here. The white cement walls had cracks in some areas especially in the corners; also a grey shade covered mostly the damp areas around the sink, the shower and the toilet, very bad insulation indeed. This flat had only a shower, but still I was grateful that Kakashi kept most of it clean. I stripped off my wet clothes, grabbed a towel set it aside and slid into the shower and turned the hot water to full speed. As it cascaded down on my body, the bottled up emotions sprouted into uncontrollable sobs under the steaming shower.

In twenty minutes of time I was out of the shower and moisturising my face with cream, which came from the plastic bag. I wonder how he knew what to buy. My eyes were slightly red and puffy, but I really didn't care anyway. I hung up my wet clothes on a hanger to dry. I grabbed the brush that Kakashi got me and combed my blond hair thoroughly. I realised that I had really soft and nice hair in comparison to my real life, which would get so oily quickly. I slipped into the shirt. It fell sloppily down my shoulders, revealing that Kakashi's shoulders are really broad and that mine are narrower and the sleeves were wide and too long. However the good part was that it covered up most of my thighs. Then I heard a faint knock at the door followed with Kakashi's calm voice.

"Hey, are you alright in there?"

I rolled my eyes with infuriation. Does he have to keep on checking on me? What else is he going to do? Ask me what I am doing on the toilet?! I really didn't need any of this now. I grabbed my bundle of things underneath my arms and unlocked the door. I pulled it wide open to find Kakashi staring at my appearance from head to toe. Maybe if I hadn't been so exhausted and angry, I would blush from embarrassment and slam the door in his face, but this time I remained calm. With a groan I pushed myself passed him to enter his room, which was prepared for me and shut the door in front of his face as he tried to enter. I dropped my things in a corner of his room and slipped into the green shuriken patterned covers in the nice comfy bed of Kakashi. I let my eyes wander in the room and found a book shelf filled with those perverted orange books of his, I sighed, yep an old pervert. I couldn't find my sleep, I was still very angry at Kakashi and the worse part was that the covers and pillow smelled like him. This manly fragrance, which sent billions of butterflies in the pit of my stomach, I felt myself blushing. I snuggled against the pillow and covers inhaling the tinniest fragrance. Everything seemed so real, the softness of the covers against my skin and the intoxicating fragrance of Kakashi. I shuddered at the contact of his shirt against my skin. It was amazing how those tiny details could affect me so much. It felt like Kakashi was sleeping beside me or that he was simply every where in this room. I incoherently mumbled his name and smiled to myself and fell into the land of slumber.

Next morning I was awoken by some loud and steady knocking, I opened my eye lids and was instantly blinded by the sun beams and with a groan I pulled the covers over my head.

"Go away!" I growled.

"Sara, time to get up." Called the casual voice of Kakashi from behind the door and I replied with a harsh tone:

"I said go away!" I snapped back at him.

From underneath the covers I heard, the door creaking open and the floor boards creaking.

"C'mon Sara, today we're going to train, so get up."

"No, five more minutes." I mumbled sleepily with a yawn.

Instantly all the images from yesterday flooded into my mind and all the stuff he said replayed in my ears like a broken record.

"Go away!" I growled finally, realizing why I was so angry this morning.

I could tell from the awkward silence that Kakashi was very confused and maybe frowning at my behaviour. Finally I felt his hand resting on the covers on my arms, which were covering my face underneath the covers. He heaved a long sigh.

"You know you are so troublesome."

Brusquely I pushed the covers away and bolted up, but then I shrieked when his face and mine were close and shoved him away. Kakashi stumbled and hit his back flat against the wooden wall and heaved a frustrated grunt.

"You don't have to be THAT close!" I roared with a hint of blush on my face and Kakashi stared at me with his usual impassive look, but I could tell that he was surprised and even angry at my reaction.

"That hurt you know." He grunted and rubbed his sore back and head.

"Well that happens to those who hover over my bed and insult me in the morning!"

"Well, I didn't mean to -

-Ha! Like I would buy that after all the stuff you said to me last night!"

It took a moment for Kakashi to realize the reasons of my grumpy mood, when he suddenly exclaimed out of realisation "Aha!"

"That would explain everything - I mean - your behaviour of yesterday."

I sat on the bed with my arms crossed over my chest and turned my head away.

"Bingo! Mister oblivious and insensitive finally hit the jack pot!" I added with a thick layer of sarcasm and giving him a sharp look.

I threw my covers aside, ignoring his surprised reaction at the sight of my bare legs, hopped out of bed, grabbed my stuff and headed to the bathroom. That guy can kiss my ass! Does he really think he can insult me as much as he pleases? Well, sorry I will defend myself no matter what! As I locked the door I found my clothes nicely folded on top of the washing machine, I went over and took a whiff of it, they were actually washed. I gave a poisonous glare to the door, this surely won't change my mind, jackass! Since when has Kakashi been such an asshole, really, I mean is he that insensitive and stupid? Well I'll definitely make better friends with Iruka or Naruto; at least both of them are sensible. I slipped out of the shirt of Kakashi, folded up neatly on the washing machine and slipped into my black trainers and tank shirt. The bandaging work was harder than I expected! After all I wanted it to look perfect, though I must admit I was too idealistic. I spend several other minutes for washing my face and adjusting my hair. Since when did my hair become so thick and heavy? I would definitely need to trim it a bit, for my opinion it had too much volumes, which I never really liked. With damp hair from the showering I cleaned up my things and exited the bathroom.

"You took relatively long."

"Well you don't know anything about women!" Was my curt reply, but then I stopped in my steps and turned around resting one finger on my lips, expressing a thoughtful face.

"Well, like you expressed yesterday, I'm basically behaving like a man." I said in a matter-of-fact tone and adding again some sarcasm to it.

Then I spun around and entered the kitchen to find some grub. After rummaging through the cupboards and fridge, I found nothing really edible only some eggs and milk.

"Kakashi, what the heck do you eat? I mean look at your fridge! You have only milk and eggs! When do you actually do grocery shopping, once every twenty years?!"

"I never have the time." Was his straight reply making me turn back promptly to him. He was casually leaning against the doorway of the kitchen, reading in that perverted book of his.

"Don't sneak on me like that!" I barked and he responded with a lazy but simple reply.

"Get used to it."

I heaved a frustrated groan at his answer and rummaged through the fridge to grab several eggs and a litre of milk and placed them on the counter near to the stove. I searched for a pan and found it and placed it one the stove.

"What are you doing?"

"Making breakfast, what else!"

"Well, I don't want to eat." Was Kakashi's final reply, which annoyed me greatly, so I turned around and walked over to him, pinching his cheek, which he disliked by all means and proved it with an annoyed "Au.".

"Look how pale and thin you are! If your mama would see this, she would definitely slap you straight across your face and bind you to the chair and stuff you with food."

"I don't think my mother would do that, I think you would do that." He corrected me after I released his cheek and I gave him a frown.

"Anyway, shinobi or not it's essential to eat in the morning; it's the most important meal in the day!" I told him and turned back to the stove and started cooking.

"You can actually cook?"

"Of course, Kakashi! I've done babysitting, did the housework, changed diapers, cooked and baked. Ha! I'm the best housewife!" Kakashi raised his eyebrows in surprise.

"Oh, so you are already married?"

Why does he ask such random questions? I gave myself a ridiculous grimace, but decided to tag along – pay back time!

"Yes of course. I have a kid at home, his name is Steve, and he's two years old, got him while I was sixteen. Oh, such a cute boy, blue eyes and curly hair and staggers about with his tiny chummy legs." I marvelled excitedly and could see Kakashi was extremely surprised yet shocked as well.

"So, who's the Father?"

"It's Jack. Oh my, he's simply so handsome, black hair and blue eyes and Oh what a great body, strong, tall and athletic! Just the perfect man!" I awed dreamily clutching my cheeks with excitement.

I noticed that the more I went into the topic, the more uncomfortable and sullen Kakashi became. His face was so delicious and I decided to add some more sour sauce on the whole conversation.

"Actually now I'm pregnant with the second one, in the first month." I said with a thoughtful face and than rested tenderly my hand on my still not existing belly. This clearly knocked Kakashi out of his senses; he had put away his book and was staring with disbelief at my belly. My God the face he made, it was like he was ditched by his girlfriend!

"I don't understand why Tsunade Sama never mentioned something about it, Uhm, about you being pregnant."

"I told her not to say anything and she agreed."

"Then that means…We can't train then, I mean, if you are pregnant you can't over exert yourself, because of the baby."

Kakashi displayed some real concern in his body language and facial expression, which rendered me speechless. I was so moved by his fatherly concern, it made me think he was my husband somehow - that would be fun if it would be the case.

"Uhm, Kakashi." His full attention came back to me; it looked like he was willing to listen to any of my orders given. Man, I cannot resist that face he was making!

"It was a joke." I told him straightforwardly.

His whole figure froze, his eye stared at me blankly and I could see from the outline of his mask that his mouth was agape. There was an awkward moment of silence.

"You actually believed everything I said?" I spluttered with disbelief and chuckled

"I must be a good actress!" I bragged. Then I eyed him with a sly smile.

"Don't have to be disappointed Kakashi, I'm single you know and we have all the time in the world to do that." I over pronounced the last bit with a flirtatious behaviour.

His response was actually as expected, he remained impassive and his hands were deep in his pockets and he scoffed.

"You know, you'll get to feel the consequences in the training." He added calmly, reopening his booklet and disappearing in his room.

With a groan I turned back to my cooking. I couldn't help but grin at my acting skills, that high ranked shinobi fell for that? Anyway I think it should've knocked anybody out of their senses. However Kakashi's reaction was as expected, I doubt that old geezer would feel a thing for me. Most importantly I'm not raising my hopes that he would. In the Naruto books he doesn't go out with girls or looks at them properly. I bet he's as dirty as the whole content of THAT orange book of his!

I made a simple breakfast, some scrambled eggs with lots of spices in it. It was amazing how I could read all the labels on the spice containers despite that it was in Japanese. It felt like my brain was accustomed to all spices. I scrapped the bits of eggs into separate plates, grabbed two pair of chop sticks and carried the plates. I turned into the living room and found Kakashi reading his book; I set the plate in front of him on the wooden table. He looked at it and back to me.

"I'm on a diet. Can't eat."

"A diet? How many times did you use that lame excuse in your life? Don't tell me you are planning to become a top model or something? Keeping up like that you'll be killed in battle and I will hunt you down if that happens!" I barked.

"Stop acting like you are my mother."

"I'm not trying to! Eat healthily instead of stinking ramen all the time!"

Kakashi shook his head, like a kid unwilling to eat his veggies. I stood there glowering at him, while he was reading in his book.

"If it's related to that mask of yours, I'll eat somewhere else - its fine for me."

Kakashi then looked at me.

"Now, EAT-IT!" I hissed and disappeared into the kitchen, there I ate in silence. It was amazing to know that I mastered eating with the chopsticks, as if I was born with them. I didn't care if he ate his breakfast or not, but I preferred staying in the kitchen rather than facing his cold fish behaviour. I turned to the sink and begun washing my dishes.

"It was good, thanks." I instantly froze, as his breath tickled my right ear. Only now I could actually sense his body warmth radiating through mine despite that our bodies weren't touching. My face flamed up. That idiot, why does he have to be so close to me?! My normal senses kicked back in and I spun around.

"I said cut that out will ya! If you do this ever again, maybe one day by accident you'll find a large butcher knife stuck in your chest!"

A prestigious chuckle emitted from him.

"You'd have to try harder because that won't happen. I never leave my guard down, in comparison to you."

"So you are saying that I should assault anybody that approaches me from behind!"

"Yea, you could say it like that."

"Jackass."

"…"

With a groan I stormed out of the kitchen and I sunk into the couch in the living room. That guy should give me a break and a large one, before I really will kill him!

"I don't get it why you lose your temper that easily."

I groaned again with all the frustration possible that guy was behind the couch, his head hovering over mine. I moved over to the single couch, away from him.

"Stop stalking me you pervert." I growled.

"I'm not -

-Oh, what next, are you going to stalk me in the showers, Sheesh!"

"…"

This wasn't helping. He remained as indifferent as usual. I rolled my eyes with irritation and grumbled.

"Let's train."

"Ok." Was his brief reply.


	7. Chapter 6

**Heya readers!! I've been getting a lot of demands from my readers to update my story and well I'm glad to do so I thank y'all for the compliments, it's an enormous pleasure!! Y'all just made my day!! Like all stories, the beginning might be boring, but as the story goes on it gets better!! So if you guys love romance, it's gonna kick in soon - well not the actual big thing - anyway I won't spoil your fun reading the chapies so please enjoy and have patience... Reading stories is fun when you take your time, ne? + or - reviews always welcome If any of you got questions or need some clarifications, please inform me, okay**

* * *

**CHAPTER SIX**

- The worst training ever with the worst memories-

We went to the entrance, slipped our sandals on and exited his apartment through the window. We hopped from roof to another in complete silence and I was glad that it remained so. In a short time we landed at the foot of the dense forest on a green spacious plain.

"We will train here." He announced in his sensei mode, which I replied by rolling my eyes.

He took several steps away from me and turned to face me, leaving a gap between us.

"Okay, today, I will teach you the basics, first of all the uses of Weapons."

"Yippee." I muttered sarcastically. Kakashi ignored my remark and continued.

"First I will teach you how to hold those weapons, how to throw them and use them and to conclude the exercise I'll set up targets for you to." He explained.

We instantly began with the training. It was much harder than I had anticipated; although I was progressing greatly in a short amount of time with Kakashi's suspicious eyes following me around. Yea, well everybody was told that I had absolutely no experience in shinobi stuff whatsoever. And now since I'm improving so quickly, I risk blowing my cover, I sure am an idiot in what regards being discrete. Finally he began to set up the targets. I was equipped with all sorts of weapons to test my capacities with them. Then Kakashi walked over to me and instructed me to use all weapons in a short amount of time to hit each target. I swallowed uncomfortably. If I fail in this, Kakashi won't ever train me again, but at the same time I must keep a low profile. Wearing now Kakashi's weapon holster on my right leg and another on my hip, I was ready to rock! Kakashi gave me the sign and I broke into a run heading into the deep forest. At ten meters I spotted the first target painted on the foot of the tree, I threw the kunai and instantly it struck the centre of the circle. Another target was in sight and I threw another, then another and another, till I arrived in an open space with only a large trunk standing in the centre. All of a sudden I noticed targets encircled me which was attached to the trees, covering 360° of my view. How in the HELL am I supposed to hit all of them at once?! Running in a circle is pathetic. An idea struck me and I took out all shurikens I possessed. There were about ten targets. So I put each shuriken between each finger and I closed my eyes for a minute to concentrate. I wasn't sure it was going to work, but it was worth trying. I opened my eyes and ran at full speed towards the trunk, running up the trunk and jumping very high above it. Now in the air upside down with my head over the ground, I spun and threw all shurikens like a tornado that shot shurikens. Without the use of my brain or knowledge, my body itself knew the exact timing for throwing the shurikens and I simply let it happen. Reflexively I landed on the top of the trunk. My body had acted on its own and unbelievably I copied Itachi's technique with the kunais and shurikens, in this one episode where Itachi demonstrated the maybe 5 year old Sasuke his super duper turning thingy in the air and hitting all targets in the bull's eye. Something snapped me out of my logical contemplating, a continuous yet threatening sizzling sound. Abruptly as I peered down the edge I noticed some sparks emitting from the body of the trunk and instantly yelped in horror.

"Oh Shit!"

I leaped from the tree with a double back flip, but was hurled away by the impact of the explosion, landing flat on my back with my arms defensively covering my face. I coughed with a wheeze, the dust had penetrated my mouth and my back was aching from the abrupt impact. I gritted my teeth and remained lying on the ground.

"Kakashiiiiii! What the hell was this! Are you planning to kill me?!"

I heard the leaves rustling and Kakashi jumped down from the bough and walked towards me with his orange book in his hands.

"I clearly told you that there would be a surprise, so I am not to blame."

"Grrr! You never said THAT kind of surprise! Thank God that I noticed it in time!"

I covered my face with irritation and still remained lying on the ground.

"You still need to work on your vigilance; you were nearly blown to bits."

"Well thank you for the information!"

"Normally I would have to fail you because of the "incident"- however - I make an exception because you achieved a, satisfactory result." Kakashi indicated with his arms the targets around us and I gaped at it in disbelief.

"Why do you mean by "satisfactory result"?! Look! I've hit all the targets!"

Every single target had a kunai stuck in its centre; I didn't miss a single one!

"It's satisfactory, because you merely showed off instead of focusing on the actual test."

"I did NOT show off!" I snapped and sat up and glared at him.

"Then explain me why you haven't noticed the explosive tag!"

I got up to my feet and protested.

"Why do you have to be so hard on me? How am I supposed to know that an explosive tag was there?! If you haven't noticed my senses aren't as developed as yours, so stop treating me like the average shinobis!"

Kakashi concealed the fact that he saw a point in my protest by keeping his usual composure.

"Anyway, I drew a conclusion from this exercise." He informed, "Your result is sufficient enough to pass. It forces me to re-evaluate our training and to arrange some changes regarding the training methods, in other words you're promoted to a higher level of training."

I was glad to hear that news, but I couldn't understand why he was so strict to me. I did my best, I exceeded my expectations and abilities, but what more does he want, what want more should I give? Hell! Can't he notice my performance?! And he calls all of this just showing off?! After a brief pause he cleared his throat.

"I must admit that I underestimated your capacity, despite that you hit all targets with precision and preformed outstandingly for a beginner."

I looked at him, hesitating whether to show pleasure or the exact opposite, the indifference in his voice forced me to observe this as a neutral response. There was again a moment of silence. I had lowered my gaze, trying to avoid his piercing eyes.

"You have to explain me this, because you exceeded the beginner's level by years." He said now expecting an answer from me and when I looked up at him - his insisting was obvious in his face.

"I don't know either, okay! I don't know the half of what I was doing!" I replied sharply and crossed my arms over my chest and looked away. I took a shuddering angered breath.

"Take that as an advantage, I'll be out of your life in no time!"

What did I expect that he'll welcome me with open arms?! Gosh Sara, wake up! Reality is supposed to be like this! If you are appointed to literally baby-sit a person that is twice annoying as Naruto, than of course you would rather get this done quickly and without complication. Why wouldn't I be surprised? I am only a mission that's all!

"Come on Kakashi; teach me? The more time you waste, the longer you have me on your neck and I don't believe you want that?"

Kakashi did display any sentiments of conscience, but merely gave me a stern look.

"Next exercise will be testing your speed. Before hand I'll give you a theory lesson about chakara, also how to use it properly and how to execute jutsus with hand seals." He instructed and we started with our next exercise.

He taught me how to run very fast without hindrance. He explained to me that by extended my arms behind me would increase my speed. I had to race against him several times and he became more and more stern and strict with me, which seriously pissed me off. I found myself being critically corrected at every detail by Kakashi; he would take a hold of my shoulders and roughly adjust them right including my hips. I despised every single contact with him - his serious and extremely stern voice reverberated in my ear banishing any nice thoughts from my head. After an hour of racing and sprinting, he started explaining me the whole chakara thing. It was easy to understand since I watched the anime and read the manga so many times already. At the same time I noticed Kakashi was closely observing. I took this fact in with irritation! Again he's suspicious. Sheesh! You can barely trust a person here, everybody suspects everybody!

Kakashi taught me the basic shadow cloning jutsu, then the transformation jutsu and substitution jutsu. It was enormous work. I didn't get the half of it right! I was simply confused of how to use the hand seals and execute jutsus – I mean no matter how hard I concentrated no results came – for that as a consequence I received a shower of disapproval from Kakashi. He grew more and more irritable at my consecutive failures. Before the volcano eruption, I had been standing on the plain concentrating, when I all of a sudden heard a strongly disapproving groan.

"Stop!" he snapped bitterly and I turned around meeting him rubbing his eyes.

"You aren't applying your chakara correctly. You ignored my teaching since the beginning! That's why you are failing to execute any jutsus. This isn't difficult!"

I was a bit shaken by his scold that I had no more energy nor will to fight back. I just took it all in. Kakashi sighed.

"Let's drop this for now."

Kakashi promptly sat on the ground and crossed his legs. I stood there observing him with confusion, what was going on?

"Just sit down."

I sat down grumpily across of him and crossed my legs.

"Close your eyes and relax yourself."

I looked at him even more bewildered than before. It was his turn to roll his eyes.

"Just do what I say." His tone was strong and I followed his instructions, closed my eyes and loosened myself up.

"Keep your mind clear, don't think of anything, but follow my instructions."

I did as he said; I emptied my mind from all thoughts and just listened attentively. The sounds which we barely hear were intensified, all I could hear the symphony that nature conducted. The symphony conducted the sounds of chirping of birds flying above our heads or sitting on trees - the whirring of the wind rustling the leaves of the trees - the distant crashing of water in a remote river and our calm rhythmic breathing. All the resentment that was boiling in my stomach like a burning fireball gradually began to extinguish. It relieved the tension from my muscles and relaxed my system. After a minute or two of pause, Kakashi spoke again, this time sounding very calm.

"I would like you to look deep inside of you and try to find this fire or burning energy."

"What if I don't find it?"

"Than try harder."

With a defeated sigh I concentrated myself, remembering the stuff he said. I shut out all sounds, all disturbances and felt like I was meditating in some sort of sound proof room. It felt dull, pitch black and to some extent discomforting. I thought I was lost in the deep Abyss, sinking deeper and deeper, until I felt a cold sensation, a dead like feeling. Wherever I was, it felt lifeless and motionless. I found myself standing in this eternal black space and wandering aimlessly around. Suddenly, a blazing light blasted me off of my feet knocking me out of balance. It was powerful and smothering power. Whatever it was, it scared me. Immense quantity of energy was seeping out of a bright source, shaking the ground with it. I stared at it blankly. The bright source took a shape of a wild fire expanding and growing powerfully, a blazing blue fire that was hovering over the ground and devouring anything in its path. How could such a fire spread out? Did it have a will of its own? It appeared to me that it was anticipating for this moment for such a long time, its form lashed its flames freely. For strange reasons I felt strongly attracted to that towering fire. I didn't feel any fear anymore, but there was something reassuring about this. With insecurity I approached that thing with my hesitant arm stretched out and I came in contact with that fire. I expected to cry out in pain, but was surprised that actually it felt pleasant so pleasant to the point that I sighed with delight. It felt like I was embraced by a serene feeling. I never felt such at ease. Its flames were teasing me, causing me to giggle. It stroked my cheek in a warm parental way. I could feel this friendly fire was wanting to tell me something and it begun by pulling me towards its body, somewhat begging me to follow. I sensed no threat, so I let it pull me into the wall of fire. Briskly, the fire penetrated into my body, I was like a sponge absorbing the water in a bucket. It was torturing me; all thoughts that this fire was friendly vanished. My body was bubbling with searing heat; everywhere hurt even my arteries and veins. It felt like hot liquid metal flowing through my veins scorching the walls and burning my insides. This must be the sensation of falling inside a volcano or living Hell! I was screaming to my complete insanity, smouldering in a puddle of excruciating heat. This must stop! I can't take it anymore! Just let me die instead of bearing this excruciating pain! LEAVE ME ALONE!

Briskly I snapped my eyes open. It took me a moment to realise my surrounding, all I knew was that I was bathing in sweat and panting profusely. Finally I noticed Kakashi sitting across of me, staring at me and my face turned brick red that was embarrassing! I remember again that I was training, and I was actually looking for my chakara. I don't know what got into me, but I got back up on my wobbly legs and ran off before Kakashi could say a word. I lost track of where I was heading, but for some reason my chakara which pulsed through my veins underneath my skin – pointed me to a direction. I ran faster and faster, repelling the trees with my mere speed. I was burning up and it was unbearable. The forest began to widen more and I noticed the lake, which I visited several times. With one gigantic bound I dived into the water. The water rushed into my face and body cooling it off, like extinguishing a fire. I wasn't sure if it was my chakara or something else, because I doubted it was so painful or was my body simply not adjusted to this world yet? I admit that I received a boost of energy and that overall I'm stronger than before, which accompanied a certain self confidence that I never felt before. Now what was only left was to work on controlling, building and applying my chakara, because I feel exhausted and worn out. I ran like 200 or 300 km/h knocking over trees! Won't that definitely awaken some suspicion?!

I realised that I was short on oxygen so I swam back to the surface. When I hit the surface I took a deep gulf of air. I enjoyed the cooling sensation of the water against my skin. I swam to shore and sat embracing my knees closer to my body to keep myself warm. I stared aimlessly in the distance. I begun to question my purpose here whether or not there was a reason for me to be here. I was tiered so I let myself drop back against the ground and crouched sideways into a ball with my heavy eye lids closing. Instantly I sunk deeper and deeper into a black pit.

A mixture of dread, anger and hatred haunted me. His malicious face baring a smirk flashed in my mind and his hands brushing skilfully along my body. His breaths scalding my lips and neck. Panic increasing, heart beats increasing, dread increasing. His body over powering mine, pinning me to the carpet, I was loosing. His dirty chuckles reverberated, as he watches me desperately struggling against him, resisting him. Suddenly the boiling heat smothers me completely; this man turns to a fire, devouring my body. I screamed for help, I screamed for a saviour, but none came. The person I thought would save me, turned away from me and vanished, so did my family.

"Sara!" called a voice and this man appeared again, this robber. I shouted and shoved him away, but he clung to me so strongly. He shook me several times, calling my name with concern. Then I bellowed with all my might.

"DON'T TOUCH ME! DON'T HURT ME, PLEASE!"

The voice that had been calling me sounded familiar and grew stronger and more insisting.

"Sara! It's me Kakashi! Wake up!"

I painfully opened my eyes and saw the outline of a dark figure which had pinned me down to the bed. The room was so dark and my eyes were so sore that my vision was blurry. I was trembling uncontrollably, panting shallowly and bathing in sweat and tears. The trauma was so extreme that despite my aching eyes I spilled hot tears and sobbed uncontrollably. I could identify with my blurred sight Kakashi's face hovering ten cm above mine. Finally I felt a certain weight against my wrists and body. I scanned this weight; Kakashi seemed to have crawled on all fours over my body. His legs managed to contain mine and with his hands he held my wrists down above my head. I was too distraught to respond. I wanted to hide my face with my hands, but his position remained immobile and so were my hands. I had no energy to move them, nothing. I couldn't see clearly what sort of face he was making; it was dark and dimly lit. He removed his hands from my wrists and removed himself from the bed to sit on the edge. He never took his gaze off of me, but held my hand comfortingly in his.

"It was just a nightmare."

His voice soothed me yet it felt distant; like he was inexperienced in those situations. "It was real. I had a nightmare of this man who..."

"…" No reply came from Kakashi.

"Sara, better get some sleep otherwise you won't be fit for tomorrow's training." Kakashi said with indifference and raised himself from the bed, releasing my hand. It was useless to believe that he could comfort somebody, so why do I keep my hopes high? However I wanted his closeness so I instinctively grabbed his arm and he froze in his movements, eyeing me from the corner of his eye.

"Please, stay here till I sleep." I pleaded with a soft voice.

There was a long moment of silence. Then Kakashi brushed of my hand, grabbed a nearby chair and placed it next to the bed, where he sank in it. He kept his cool gaze on my face with his hand resting on his lap. I outstretched my hand, pulling his hand away from his lap on my bed and closing it firmly with my hand around his. I noticed his surprised expression. Kakashi didn't reply, but I could tell through his impassive behaviour that he was astonished. My fingers intertwined with his and with a content sigh, I closed my eye lids and drifted away into a peaceful slumber.


	8. Chapter 7

THX so much for your reviews and putting these Alert thingis!! It makes me so happy and simply motivates me to update!! Love y'all very much and thank you again!!

* * *

**CHAPTER SEVEN**

- Happy moments last shorter -

I awoke the next morning in a good mood and it took me some moments for my sleepy brain to actually understand why. It struck me like an ice cold shower in the early morning. Oh Hell! Now I definitely won't be able to look at him straight in the face, especially if he saw my vulnerable side last night. I sunk my face with an annoyed groan in my palms, I am such a loser! I think he'll throw me out for being such a cry baby and that would be the end of the world if it happens!! The worst part is I have no clue how to get home! I fell into my usual crisis attack. I took a deep breath and did a few breathing exercises to regain myself. Anyway Kakashi will pick on me definitely, so I must be prepared for anything. Expect the unexpected. I jumped out of bed, hastily grabbed my things and dashed into the bathroom. After a hot and then cold refreshing shower, I trotted gleefully humming a tune back into the bedroom and made my bed. Thereafter with a deep breath, I left the bedroom to the kitchen. At the same time I noticed this odd silence and wandered around the flat to find Kakashi, but no sign of him. Finally I spotted at the entrance the absence of his sandals and with a shrug I went back into the kitchen to prepare myself a nice and filling Brunch. I hate to say this, but I never in my entire stay enjoyed eating by myself, especially without that annoying Kakashi and his complexes regarding his mask. I sighed contently and leaned back against the chair, I'm so full! Then my thoughts drifted to my family, I wonder how they are doing, if they are enjoying themselves? It's been now two weeks since I left home and didn't see anything positive about it, only that I've become some sort of lab rat that must be supervised for 24/7. After letting myself digest, I got up and washed the dishes and cleaned up the whole kitchen. Afterwards I sat down in the living room zapping through the TV channels. I don't know how many hours I sat in front of the TV, but only knew that it was dark outside. I switched off the TV and finally looked at the clock. It was 10 PM, where the hell is that old man! Shouldn't he be back by now? And what about the training? Didn't he insist so much on it? I groaned and got up from the couch, ran to the entrance and put my sandals on and disappeared from the apartment. The only way to find that perv is to look for him, so I walked along the lit streets of Konoha, passed the food stores, restaurants and stumbled across a bar. Of course I bet there are a lot of bars, but this seemed to be the only nice and big one, also there were these blazing neon lights blinding any by passers. Although I despise bars, I felt drawn into it so I stepped in. A thick cloud of smoke hovered in the whole bar; many shinobis sat together chatting and laughing amongst themselves while sipping their beers. Many young girls tried to flirt their way through with their male neighbours sitting on the bar stool beside them. I rolled my eyes; they don't seem to realize that the bar is the last place on Earth to find a guy. Many single men sat on the bar stools glooming themselves to death with jugs of alcohol, how miserable. I confidently walked in, I caught everybody's attention and it discomforted me greatly, but I kept my head high and sat on the bar stool.

"Can I get you something?" Spoke the bartender, while drying his jugs.

It was a short and rounded guy with a beard. A typical example of a man, who drinks billions of litres of alcohol a day. I smiled.

"Yes, I would like a beer without alcohol."

"We have several kinds…"

"Give me the cheapest one." I interrupted him before he started naming them.

"Okay." He replied and turned away to get a mug and the beer.

I watched him attentively; we never know what a bartender can put in your drinks. The bartender turned around and placed the beer in front of me.

"Here you go."

"Thanks."

I grabbed it and took a big sip of it and at the same time scanned the room. I was hoping to find Kakashi, but as I finished scanning the room, I realized that he wasn't there, which was a relief. Because if he had been here he would have dragged me out of the bar a long time ago and maybe even killed me straight away.

"Are you looking for someone?" asked a man's voice and I turned my head to the right.

I couldn't believe who was actually standing beside me. He had a friendly smile; he clearly wasn't under the influence of alcohol. He had long chocolate brown hair tied up into a pony tail and wore the Konoha Head gear. A remarkable scar stretched across his face over the back of his nose. His face showed reassurance and kindness, which all men in this bar lacked. Unfortunately I knew him too damn well.

"Is it free?" he indicated on the empty barstool next to mine and I nodded. He sat down and said to the bartender.

"Same order as her." The bartender nodded without a response.

"You now I ordered beer without alcohol." I told him and took a sip of my drink.

"It's fine for me, I don't drink."

I muffled a chuckle.

"No, seriously, I don't drink."

I sighed and replied to his statement.

"I heard that so many times, but you can tell me frankly that your purpose here is to check me out." I took another swig from my drink and eyed him with confidence, as I saw him smiling nervously at my remark.

"You are not from here, right?"

"Yea, I'm not. How could you tell?"

"You've got a different tone that most Konoha women, moreover your style and direct approach is not from here. Secondly the way you dress, it's not typical Konoha and lastly and most obviously is that you are drinking beer and not Japanese alcohol like Sake and so." I watched him with surprise as he listed all the points, which made me in the Konoha society; stick out like a sore thumb, thank you for the compliment dumbass!

"I'm impressed by your skills, but you should know that this was a fatal move, because you just lost the girl you were checking out." I told him with some irritation and looked away from, turning the jug around in my hands so that the fluid flowed in circles.

"Sorry I didn't mean to be rude – I…" he apologized frantically and I eyed him with amusement.

He was actually very cute when he gets embarrassed.

"No need to apologize. I'm just really pissed now." I added sourly and finished my beer with a gulp.

There was a moment of pause; this guy seemed so desperate that he didn't want to get me off of his hook. It recognised his attempt as pathetic and hopeless, but venting my anger on him wouldn't make me happy either.

"Anyway my names Hanshin Sara and yours?" I introduced myself and looked at him with my full attention and outstretched my hand.

Iruka seemed instantly revived with hope and he beamed.

"I'm – I'm Umino Iruka." He replied and shook my hand with a nervous smile.

After we released our hands, Iruka felt more comfortable and began to make his fist approach.

"So what brings you here?"

"Mission." Was my straight reply, after all I couldn't say "I am a captive" and on the other hand I gradually began to enjoy his company, so I wanted to keep the conversation going.

"Ah, okay." He replied and did respect my brief reply without questioning further.

"So, uhm, do you work?" I asked him.

"Yea, as a teacher at the shinobi academy."

"Wow, that's awesome. So you are a Chuunin?"

"Yes, precisely. So you are a regular shinobi, a Chuunin or Jounin?"

"I'm a Jounin." I replied straightforwardly, boldly lying about my reputation, I felt like instead of lying I was more so bragging. I could tell he was eager to know more.

"Iruka, I hope you can understand the fact of my briefness about my job as shinobi."

"Oh, sure I do understand and I'm sorry if I seem so eager and insisting to know more about you." He said with a friendly tone and grinned.

Man, if all shinobis were as gentleman as him then I would go out with each of them!

"So did your friends hook you up with me or something?" A nervous chuckle came from him and he scratched the back of his head.

"Actually, yes." He gave in with slight embarrassment and he turned his head back to grin at his companions.

I followed his movement and found some guys sitting comfortably at a table and waving. I raised my jug and smiled that I actually appreciated what they did. Just thank God that I didn't know any of them. He turned his attention back to me.

"Are you single?" he asked me with some discomfort in his tone and I thought it was really cute.

"Yes I am and I don't know why in God's name I came in here." I chuckled at my brainless action. I could see the fire of hope extinguishing from his eyes.

"I came here because I was looking for a friend and apparently that idiot is not here." I said and glanced around the room once more. I glanced at the clock and sighed.

"Sorry to cut you off like this, but duty calls and, uhh could you do me a favour?"

"Anything."

"I feel very guilty about it but, could you pay my beer?"

Iruka stared at me for a moment than reconsidered his answer.

"It's no problem; at least you ask me and didn't run off." He told me with a chuckle and I grinned at him gratefully.

He pulled out the money and placed it on the bar table. We got up from our barstools and he accompanied me out of the bar in front of the entrance.

"I enjoyed our conversation; I think I really needed a person like you to talk to." I told him feeling refreshed as we stood face to face. He smiled gratefully.

"It was nice talking to you too, I also enjoyed it."

"I apologize to leave you so sudden, but I really have to look for my companion, who knows maybe he's drinking himself to death or is lying unconscious somewhere." I added with some dry humour, which he replied with a chuckle.

An awkward silent moment passed and he stared at me in a penetrative and attractive way. It wasn't that typical playboy look, but a look of somebody pure and sensitive, an affectionate look. His look clearly got me off guard.

"Uhm, I really gotta go thank you so much for everything. See you someday." I said and bade him good bye. As I turned away and walked some meters, his calls urged me to turn around and he ran to me.

"Will we see each other again?"

"Definitely." I smiled to him in a friendly matter, but was astound, when he did a VERY unexpected action.

He had grabbed my arms and was about to kiss my cheek, but suddenly the memories of the robber flooded my mind and energetically with a shout I pushed him away. I panted and covered my face with my hands.

"Sara, I'm so sorry, I didn't..."

"Ah, Uhm, sorry - thank you again, good night." I spluttered and ran off.

What the hell did I do! I shouldn't have set foot into that bar, now I'll have flocks of men running after me! Shit! I mean how can I be so stupid, I just gave him enough hope to make a move on me! I'm such an idiot that was totally reckless of me! I seriously believe this will end in pain! Suddenly booming laughter's' erupted from a nearby restaurant and it grabbed my immediate attention. The whole restaurant was wide open for people to enter wherever they wanted, no windows nor doors. Seats surrounded each circular table which were separated with walls to create some privacy. The smell of grilled pork lingered in the air driving my empty stomach nuts. I realized that I haven't eaten any dinner and my stomach was growling with hunger. As a neared it, I heard a familiar laugh, a bizarre laugh which all the time brought me to laugh. It was Kakashi's laugh. I walked closer until I entered the restaurant, I followed the laughter until I stopped and heard their voices just across the wall at the other table. I sat on the opposing seats with the back of my head facing the thin walls. I recognized Gai, Kurenai and Asuma's voices and Kakashi's voice came from where I was leaning my head against.

"Now Kakashi, how is it going with that girl?" asked Asuma

"It's okay, she's got a lot of potential and it seems she's trying to hide it."

"What do you mean?" questioned Kurenai with an eager tone, which made her unrecognisable.

"She appears to have no knowledge whatsoever about weapons or jutsus, but I've recognized in her moves the similarity to Naruto's and Sasuke's style – it's like she had learned them by heart. She's a mystery to solve. She denies any familiarity to Konoha despite that she recognises the area and the name of the people. Remember when she called out your names in the hospital without you giving them to her? Frankly speaking I think it's very suspicious. How can a simple girl of her age, who never grew up in Konoha or had any knowledge of our culture or any connections, know so much about us and our society?" Explained Kakashi with precision in his usual serious tone.

I had to muffle a gasp and my heart just froze out of fear. He was too observant, despite that I had to admit he's a top shinobi, but it made me realize to take some drastic measures, meaning shutting my yap. I had no clue that I was imitating Naruto or Sasuke's style? I never noticed it. He was simply way too skilled and I was typically again too dense to realize that I was creating suspicion.

"As expected from our observant Colleague, I admit that I share the same opinion as you. However I don't believe she's a threat to Konoha, I mean you have to look at her." Said Gai positively, but was sharply interrupted by Kurenai.

"Don't speak any nonsense Gai! You may never know how appearances can deceive people!"

Again I gasped quietly; those guys really don't trust anybody.

"Anyway I was just saying." Added Gai to calm Kurenai down and she sighed.

"Like Gai said, I don't believe she's a threat, I mean you should look at her. I don't think an enemy would dare to enter Konoha under the pretence of drowning and following an apprenticeship. Then how the heck is she supposed to know that Kakashi was there at the same time?" Pointed out Asuma concisely.

I was glad to know that there were actually some people siding with me.

"Anyway it's affirmative, she's a spy." Kakashi concluded firmly.

His statement had such a strong impact on me that I felt like my heart was rammed through with a kunai.

"Kakashi, don't be rash with your judgment. If you deliver a false accusation this will severally damage your reputation." warned Asuma wisely.

There was a moment of silence, it seemed that Asuma, Kurenai and Gai were waiting for a response from Kakashi, but none came.

"So, what kind of girl is she?" asked Kurenai, who finally spoke up, breaking the icy silence. A long sigh escaped from Kakashi.

"She has a difficult character. She's rebellious, loves to pick fights with anybody she comes across with, she's over sensitive and gets all emotional for the tiniest things, she's stubborn as a donkey and annoying as hell." He stated with indifference and laziness, which I digested with my lip curling out of anger.

"Kakashi, you know you only stated her negative sides." Noticed Gai and a growl escaped from Kakashi and Gai flinched fearfully.

"It's the first time you actually pay attention to a person, especially towards a girl – Kakashi are you developing some interests for her?" asked Asuma with curiosity.

My heart skipped a beat as he said that.

"Like I would! Already sharing my flat with her is such a pain in the ass." He commented, then a round of "Oooo" came from Asuma, Kurenai and Gai and they laughed. I scrunched my face to a glare that guy was so mean!

"Sharing your flat?" repeated Gai with amusement.

"Kakashi, this looks very serious, I mean only couples share flats." Added Kurenai enthusiastically, as if it was the most interesting topic she ever heard in her life. I actually never thought about that.

"Is our lonesome Kakashi developing some lovey-dovey feelings?" Said Gai with an exaggerated tone and I gulped with discomfort and raging heart beats.

"She's beautiful and all, her character combines well with Kakashi's, don't you think? He definitely needs a woman." Supplied Asuma with amusement and he chuckled.

I was blushing wildly at those remarks from the Jounin's. I covered my mouth trying to restrain a shriek and to jump. All three laughed except for Kakashi, which I bet was glaring at them and by any minute was going to detonate. Instantly something hard was slammed against the table, rattling the glasses and dishes which silenced the Jounins instantly.

"Stop behaving like this, all of you! I respect the code and will not allow myself to taint my reputation! I was simply appointed to train her and to supervise her for 24/7 - this means there is absolutely nothing going between us. I treat her with equal care as to all the missions I have conducted so far." He informed them with a stern tone, which shook me and he took a deep breath to calm down.

"This mission is one of the most nerve wrecking mission that I have dealt with in my life! The girl's unbearable; she's disrespectful, undisciplined and immature. Do you seriously think that I would fall for that sort of person? She's the last person in the world that I would ever fall for! Am I making myself clear? So rub out that bullshit from your mind and don't you ever bring up that topic again, you hear me!" Scolded Kakashi sharply.

This clearly silenced the Jounins and everybody else in the restaurant. I let his statement smother me with every syllable. Until the tears welled up in my eyes and I dashed out of the restaurant. I never had been so disappointed or so humiliated in my entire life! The person that I admired and thought I could trust turned out to be a backstabber. Everywhere I was treated like this, people would pretend to be nice to me and behind my back they would criticise me. I thought I could find refuge from this evil in the Naruto world, but I was wrong. It shouldn't have shocked me, I know Kakashi regarded me as a mission but there was this hope that there could be more. He doesn't care a bit about me and everything, every single thing he said or did for me was a complete lie. Such backstabbing bastard! I hope you are proud of yourself, because tomorrow you won't recognize me anymore!

As I entered Kakashi's flat, I leaned against the door and broke out crying with agonizing sobs. I ran into the room, stripped my clothes off and put my pyjamas on –Kakashi's shirt - and jumped to bed. With frustration I slammed my fists on the bed and kicked as well.

"I HATE that bastard, he should go to HELL! He should rot there! Ibito shouldn't have saved Kakashi! His father should have killed him too! He should die millions of DEATHS that cold hearted selfish ruthless self-centred Bastard!" I shouted but gasped at the horrible things I said.

I sunk my head into the pillow and cried miserably. His words haunted my mind and only three hours later, I managed to fall asleep.

I woke up the next morning just before dawn. The room still bathed with semi-darkness. I got up and prepared myself for a new day. In ten minutes I was washed up and dressed. I walked passed the living room, but was instantly drawn back to the living room with a start. My jaw went slack and my eye balls nearly popped out of my skull.

"Oh my, Heavenly God!" I muttered through my hands that were clasped around my mouth.

Kakashi was lying on the couch with his covers pushed down to his feet. The only piece of clothing was his baggy navy blue pyjamas pants. I had to cover my mouth to prevent myself from making an excited tantrum. I would normally run away in such a situation but I remained rooted to the spot. The sight of Kakashi's naked torso gently rising and sinking nearly made have a nosebleed. His torso appeared well trained and lean like an athletic. His arms were strong and firm, adding with his well defined shoulders and collar bones, made him robust. He seemed to be so different without his shirt, another person really. I felt so drawn to him that I had a vision of his body holding mine and abruptly I bit my lip and shook my red head with disgust and shame. What kind of perverted thoughts do I have?! That is just so disgusting! Despite that his body was so tempting and attractive, there was something that just overruled my adoration for his body…I was actually seeing his REAL face!! Can you believe it! Sooo hooooooot!! A streak of his silvery hair fell down on one side of his face as he tilted his head. His eyes were shut and he seemed to be deeply sleeping. His creamy toned face was decorated with a fine yet sharp nose and a pair of delicate lips, which made him even sexier than he usually is. Oh my God! WHAT THE HELL AM I TALKING ABOUT?! HE AND SEXY, NO WAY!! Yet I was praising every single second for witnessing him in this state. Thank you so much for giving me this opportunity to see him like this, oh thank you, thank you! My heart beats increased as I studied his whole body with the blush growing hotter and darker over my cheeks. Suddenly he moved and I dropped to the ground. He moaned sleepily, reaching for his covers to cover himself and turned his back on me, sleeping on his side. I remained on the floor for a moment. I sighed in relief, and then crawled out of the living room into the kitchen to prepare some breakfast.


	9. Chapter 8

**Gomen neee!! I've been writing on a story, nothing related to fanfictions though, but a story that I've been working on two years now - huff - It so kills my brain cells, but I am so close to ending it!! That damn thing is 440 pages and still not finished!! Gosh I am SO gonna celebrate when i get this damn thing over (i meant my story, not fanfic, oki?) Anyway enjoy, enjoy, enjoy!!**

* * *

**CHAPTER EIGHT**

-Whatever he may say or do I'll still remain angry-

After that enticing, exciting and "heart melting" experience, I still went back on my words - I'll change so much that even he won't recognize me. So what happened this morning I interpreted as something natural, like spotting my brothers sleeping in their boxer shorts and somehow it did work, yet it haunted my memories and filled me with smutty thoughts. While I was preparing breakfast, I realized that Kakashi actually did some shopping. He bought fresh vegetables and some proteins!! Certainly he did a big shopping; I mean to feed nearly a whole family of seven kids! It was crazy, or maybe he was too drunk to have noticed how much he shopped. I was pretty grateful to have some time alone before facing that Kakashi and I enjoyed focusing on the cooking. Fortunately I finished cooking before Kakashi was up. Instead of going to him and shaking him awake - mostly because I was too lazy and didn't want to face him – I called him from the kitchen. Also my other reason was he would be seriously offended if I saw him without mask.

"Oi, Kakashi sensei! Get up! Breakfast is ready!"

"Would you mind keeping it down." Appeared his voice, sounding drowsy and somewhat in pain. I turned around, meeting him leaning with his sides against the doorway, massaging his temples. He had his mask on again and had some black rings beneath his eyes and to my discomfort he was still shirtless. On the other hand his hair fell slightly down his face, as if the headgear was some sort of support for his hair to keep them from falling in his face. My face instantly flamed up with blush and brusquely I turned my back on him and busied myself with cleaning some of the dishes.

"That's what you get if you stay up so late, or better said for having a hang over." I stated with indifference.

"…" Clearly Kakashi was too in pain to answer a thing.

I grabbed the two plates that were filled with food and turned back to him. Frustrated I shoved one plate into his hands with the chop sticks included and gave him a glare then walked off to the living room.

"What did I do now?" called Kakashi lazily.

I sat at the table in the living room and too soon Kakashi joined me, sitting across of me. During breakfast I kept my eyes on the food and on my chop sticks and nowhere else. Despite that I was trying my best to ignore him, I constantly had this feeling that he was regularly looking at me. Finally I took my eyes off of my food and caught Kakashi's gaze resting on me.

"What?" I asked him with disinterest.

Kakashi kept a thoughtful attitude while staring at me.

"Is, something bothering you?" he questioned me calmly.

I slammed my fists on the table, knocking over our mugs filled with tea and spilling some food.

""Is there something bothering you?" What's this, now? Being all sensitive so suddenly, where the last time, you just remained cold? Why the sudden change?" I snapped with fury at him, he was surprised at my outburst and seemed to be clueless about the reasons.

"I just noticed you were avoiding me so I thought you were angry and anyway I am not as you call it "cold"" He corrected with his usual calm tone.

"Shut up! You wanna know why I am angry? Because you left me to rot in this apartment yesterday, while you had fun getting yourself drunk with Asuma, Gai and Kurenai!" I spat, but realized that I said too much and Kakashi was looking at me with a surprised gaze and slowly growing seriousness.

"You left the apartment?" he questioned me straightforwardly and I didn't reply nor looked at him, which he understood it as a "yes". He groaned with irritation.

"You know you could have gotten killed and believe me I wouldn't have come to your rescue anyway!" he scolded me with controlled anger.

"Well why you bother telling me this if you preferred seeing me dead!"

"That's not part of my job to get you killed."

I bit my lip to hold my anger back and took a deep breath.

"But still, Kaka – Sensei, if you are so irritated about this mission, then pass this job to somebody else." I told him quietly and diverted my gaze to the table.

There was a moment of silence, but then a long helpless sigh came from Kakashi.

"So that's the point. Listen up kid. It's my job to teach and to fight in battle. I go there because I'm paid and through that I gain experiences. I do my job even if I hate it and I don't run away from it. Jobs aren't always meant to be fun; it varies from fun to boring and annoying. However it's important to focus only on your improvements rather than the emotions and feelings of the teacher's." He explained to me in a matter-of-fact tone and for once he was right.

It's true. One should only focus on one's potential and achievements rather than the teacher emotions. The teacher's impression about you is meaningless and has no value. If one relies on the teacher's impression in no time one is bound to get disappointed. This blinding admiration for him caused to me to put high expectations for him. Despite this, he hurt me by talking behind my back, so how can I forgive him?

"Can you stop talking to me like I was one of your 12 or 13 year old students? For your information I'm legally an adult!" I growled and Kakashi scratched the back of his head, expressing his indifference.

"You are one still until you reach my age." I rolled my eyes with irritation and retorted,

"Treat me as an adult, dammit! That's the least I am asking you for!"

I glared at him in the eyes, running away or sulking will not help, I must face him and tell him.

"I've been treating you with respect all this time, trying not to impose on you, making your meals, trying to become literally invisible in order to prevent you from getting irritated and keeping my mouth shut at your harsh teachings or humiliations and what do I get? NOTHING, absolutely nothing! All I've been wanting from you is to receive the same respect. Dammit it's not my fault that you have to deal with of me!" I expressed with bitterness without breaking eye contact.

Kakashi simply looked at me, the indifference still reflected in his behaviour.

"I'm serious, just believe me!" I reiterated with a stronger voice and bowed my head to express my sincerity.

I was clueless of Kakashi's momentary reaction because my head was lowered with my eyes desperately focused on my clenched fists in my laps. Another moment of silence roamed between us. I was praying that he was going to understand me and his next reaction was unexpected. He rested his hand on my head and told me.

"Let's go train."

Then he removed his hand, took his dishes and left me alone in the living room. Still startled of his action, I stared in front of me. Then I placed my hand on my head, disbelieved that his hand was there a moment ago. Was that a sign that he understood me? I was confused of its true meaning behind his action.

Within an hour we were back on the training field and Kakashi began giving his speech, summarizing what we did so far and then he explained a bit about chakara.

"It's very important to release a good amount of chakara to perform well with jutsus. Since chakara and stamina are combined, you will lose all your energy if you exert the amount of chakara. If you use too little you won't get hurt or killed, but your jutsus will be weak and ineffective." He explained briefly.

"But how can I notice if I'm using too much or too little?"

"You'll naturally find out when you get used to applying your chakara and anyway I'm here to help you out."

"It's important to use a moderate amount of chakara to perform a jutsu or to perform well in combat." He described and then with a wave of his hand he hinted me to follow him to a tree.

"One of the basic trainings of controlling chakara is to walk up a tree or walk on water and walls. Let me demonstrate." He raised his hand to his face to reveal only his index finger and middle finger raised.

"First of all, concentrate. Let a reasonable amount of chakara flow to the soles of your feet and while you are at it, release little of it, this will glue you to the tree." He explained while performing the whole thing.

Within seconds he was dangling down from the bough of the tree. I copied his movements and found myself already standing firmly against the tree.

"Hmn, not bad." He admitted.

I was stunned and I walked comfortably up along the main body of the tree. Kakashi observed with some surprise.

"Is that normal that you progress so fast?"

I shrugged at his questioned and continued walking up to the peak. Then from on top, I took a good look at the surroundings, it was simply beautiful. I've never seen an endless forest before, filled with healthy lush green trees. The cloudless blue sky beautified the surroundings. With a content sigh, I walked back down the trunk with my arms behind my back, as if I had gone for a stroll. Kakashi stood in the middle of the way with his hands in his pockets and eyeing me with a serious gaze.

"It looks like the meditating helped a lot to find my chakara and to get control of it." I said with a proud smile.

Kakashi stood firmly, eyeing me suspiciously and I ignored his behaviour by turning away from him and taking another way down from the tree.

"Don't go down yet, I would like to see how long you can hold out." Ordered Kakashi and I stood still. I made a turn and walked back up.

"How long?"

"Until you drop from the tree."

"Ok." I replied without worry.

Something was reassuring me that I would make it. So we remained glued to the tree for 2 hours straight. I didn't show any sign of exhaustion and often I went to the peak of the tree to marvel the sight. Kakashi didn't once leave me out of his sight, he watched me analytically and pensively. It didn't bother me as much as it did before.

"Come let's go back down." He finally announced and I followed him.

We set our feet back on firm ground.

"Next we'll go to the lake and try out walking on the water." He directed and again I followed him without saying a word.

After couple of minutes of running through thick forest we arrived at the lake - which became my favourite spot – and he instantly continued.

"It's the same basics, I'll let you begin." He explained and gave me the access to the lake.

I repeated the same actions and stepped without difficulty on the surface of the water. I walked around and Kakashi joined me. His sharp eyes never left my presence, but I ignored them all the way through. Out of pure excitement of my progress today, I ran across the lake and headed to the cliff and ran up the steep wall of jagged rocks. The cliff was tough to climb and Kakashi was already standing at the foot of the cliff with his hands in his pockets and looking lazily upwards.

"Sara, don't do anything reckless, because I won't carry you to the hospital if you break a bone." He called up to me and I gave a loud "ok" to reassure him.

I marched further up, until I turned around to look back down at the distance I made. I think I was ten meters above the water surface and Kakashi still was looking at me, clearly he was prepared for the worst if it ever came. I had an idea and I couldn't hold back a smirk. I peered down the cliff to check if there weren't any rocks, then I pushed my feet against the jagged wall and bounced off. I fell down and stretched myself out, preparing myself to dive in. I could see Kakashi became highly alarmed in a serious manner at my jump. With a discrete splash I was under water. A chill spread throughout my body at the instant contact of the water against my skin. I never thought I could do that! Especially diving head first from 10 meters! I think my gift with water, softened my impact and spared me from smacking any parts of my body in the water. I swam with a feeling of serenity; the water embraced me with affection. Only with a couple of strokes I was unusually fast and my moves were graceful. I should swim more often. Strange enough I didn't have the urge to get more oxygen, it was as if I was locked inside an invisible bubble. My eye sight was crystal clear; maybe it's due to the anime style that I could see so well. The bottom of the lake was very dark, but the sun managed to illuminate many areas under water. The Sea weed danced at the current of the lake and many colourful fishes swam in groups. They weren't afraid of me and some curious ones swam towards me and stared at me. It was really strange but amazing at the same time. I never could get so close to nature and feel this serenity that I've never ever experienced in my life. I would prefer to stay down here. It heard this awkward tapping noise and when I looked upwards I saw the soles of Kakashi's sandals. He seemed to be pacing about with impatience. An idea popped in my head and I grinned. I swam carefully behind a boulder and looked at his paces slow down. Should I let him be tortured by worry or just swim back to the surface? Somehow I wanted to make him suffer, so I waited a bit longer. His paces stopped and this was the moment. I swam quickly and carefully, keeping my eyes on the soles of his sandals. As I was only a hand reach away from his feet. I could clearly see what Kakashi was doing; he was busy scanning the surrounding. I grabbed both of his feet and pulled him down in the water. It went quickly without difficulty, which I found really peculiar. Under water he instantly turned around to face me and I gave him a grin. He was slightly surprised as he had a raised brow, but then he gave a reproving scowl and as a response I stuck my tongue out teasingly and gave him a hand sign that we should go to the surface. We swam up to the surface. We took a gasp of oxygen. I looked over and had to muffle my laughter; the sight was absolutely funny. Kakashi was still eyeing me with disapproval. He looked like an angry wet dog. His silver hair dropped down in heavy strands rendering his hair like wet dog fur. I coughed to control myself. Kakashi was already getting back on his feet and I only put my elbows out of the water, like there was an invisible board beneath my arms.

"That wasn't fun. I nearly thought I had to fish out your corpse or something." Said Kakashi with an impassive voice, but I could clearly detect that he was angry.

For a second I thought I saw some concern in his eyes, but I kicked out that idea.

"Sorry." I apologized quietly, diverting my gaze. Then I put my arm back in the water and splashed Kakashi straight in the face.

He took that as an offence clearly, because his face became tenser with anger. I laughed and still could not see my method being fruitful as he angry and stiff.

"Hey! Relax! Don't you understand the meaning of fun?" I told him with enthusiasm. His facial muscles relaxed a bit, but not too much that he could actually enjoy the meaning of "fun".

"You know it doesn't hurt if you have some fun. You cannot remain serious all the time, otherwise you'll get wrinkles." I said casually and no reply.

"Anyway how old are you?" I asked him and he finally uttered something, but in a rather grave tone.

"That's none of your business."

"26."

"…"

"You are old." I stated flatly and his eye widened.

"Old?"

"Yea, old man." I could feel that my teasing was a success, because the word "old" seemed to be one of his weak spots.

I dropped back into the water and swam two meters away and turned back to him.

"Catch me if you can, old man." I called with a grin and that blew the fuse. He was already running towards me. I dove in quickly and swam far down as fast as I could. I hid myself behind a bolder and watched where Kakashi was, I spotted the soles of his sandals still on the surface remaining motionless. However he dropped into the water and dove down, straight towards me. I swam away and Kakashi was hot on my tail. He swam fast as he could, but never managed to catch me and many times he had to get some oxygen, but I wasn't pressed about getting some. It was funny to see Kakashi so serious and determined to catch me; I don't think anybody would like to be treated as "old man" or "old". After playing cat and mouse, Kakashi gave up and swam back to the surface. I remained under water for a moment, it's not normal that Kakashi gives up, especially if his pride is at stake. I stopped in my strokes and slowly swam back to the surface. I hit the surface taking in a lot of oxygen. I noticed Kakashi already standing on the water, bending over and using his hands as support against his knees. He was still panting. I pulled myself out of the water and now standing on the surface.

"You're good..." He panted and he took a deep breath to regain his energy and to stand at his full height, he wore again a grave face.

"However, I hate when people call me "old", especially if I am not." Stated Kakashi with a slightly irritated tone and before I could act or say a word.

I was instantly caught by something from behind, which wrapped its arms tightly around me like a pincer and pulled me closely to its body. I gasped at the contact of the heat emitting from it.

"Didn't expect that, did you?" breathed Kakashi from behind me, the heat of his voice burning a hole in my ear.

I shuddered uncomfortably. What was this sensation? Why was my body going crazy at the contact of his warm body? Why did it excite me to feel his heartbeats? I was praying that he couldn't hear my heart beats, which I doubt. The Kakashi in front of me disappeared in the water; obviously it was a water clone.

"While I was chasing you, I preformed two water clones and exchanged places with one of them, I hid myself under water, while one of the clones was chasing you and the other was waiting on the surface. Soon as my clone that was chasing you swam up to the surface; it disappeared leaving you with the clone I left on the surface a long time before. While my clone spoke to you, I took advantage of this moment and caught you." He explained to me in a logic manner.

I ignored his babbling for sometime, my body was so focused on the sensations he provoked to my body, which I had difficult fighting it. In the end my mind gave in and my body was squealing in delight at our closeness. However when his hot breathe scaled my ears twice, it brought back the memories which I never wished to relive again. Brusquely I pulled my head away from him, my frame began to weaken and shake and my heart stopped a beat.

"Huh?" Slipped out of Kakashi's mouth, sounding very astonished.

"Let go of me, before I tear you to shreds!" I barked with a trembling and uncontrollable tone and Kakashi instantly released me.

I stumbled across, my eyes shocking wide with the colour vanishing from my face. I clutched my body tightly, as if under pain and collapsed on my knees. It was like he was still here, I could hear, feel and smell him.

"So afraid, so afraid… I still see his face, hear his voice, his breathing and feel his touches and hot breath on my skin. I was so afraid that if I would resist him he would kill me. He tried so hard to hurt me." I muttered quietly with trauma and then I dug my nails into my arms.

"If I meet that bastard robber again, I'll kill him and send him to hell!" I exclaimed with frustration and suddenly became quiet when I felt Kakashi's reassuring hand on my shoulder.

He didn't say a word and I felt frustrated about it, what's the point of putting his hand on my shoulder without comforting me? Yet his hand had an amazing calming affect on me, which encouraged me to freely cry. Anyway I was already crying, crying silently.

"You'll get over it one day." He said but I retorted,

"Get over it?" I repeated reproachfully jumped back to my feet and faced him.

"You have no idea, how it feels?! I mean how should you know, you're only a man! - This is a scar dammit!" I croaked at the last bit

"Kakashi, I don't have any intentions of dying as an old maid. That experience is restricting me from getting close to men - I want to have a family later." My emotions took over me and everything just poured out.

He expressed some surprise at discovering this side of mine and certainly it seemed very unfamiliar to him. Kakashi sunk his hands into his pockets and lowered his gaze.

"You mustn't let this become your weakness." Said Kakashi with indifference and I scoffed.

"Are you trying to say that I am weak?" I repeated with protest.

Kakashi observed me with sharp eyes.

"You are weak if you are going to let this dominate your life." told Kakashi sternly and then turned his back on me.

"Despite how traumatic your experiences were, never let it become a weakness to you. If you know that this experience will hinder your happiness than fight it!" advised Kakashi sternly said and gazed in the sky.

He must be referring to one of his painful experiences. It could either be his best friend's death or his father's death. All this pain in this world is anyway fictional, how could those Anime characters understand a human's feelings? Even Kakashi isn't real, all this isn't real, and I might just wake up from it any moment.

"Can we just go back? I need some rest, please." I stated weakly and massaged my temples. I walked to Kakashi, who still was staring at the sky. Then he looked back at me, while I stared right through him.

The training was called for a day and we headed back to the flat without saying a word. I was the first one to take a shower and to retreat into the bedroom without dinner. What happened simply was too much to bear. His words from before and from the restaurant were gradually weighing heavier and heavier. Yea, ignore the teacher and focus on your achievements or on the training, easier said than done! I'm stuck in the same flat with him for 24/7, including eating, cleaning, sitting and training! No elbow room! Only when I go to the bathroom and sleep! In the beginning I was admiring every single moment and now I hate every single moment alone with him! I bet that any Kakashi fans in this world would exchange places with me and do anything to see Kakashi butt naked! I got sick and tiered of getting to know anymore about him. No! Cross the last bit out, I don't know him at all! He doesn't want to open up and actually why should I care, then I'll close myself up and refuse him. I immediately sensed a presence of chakara and groaned.

"Can you never knock? You just waltz in and don't care if I might be changing!" I snapped sharply, eyeing him angrily.

I found him sitting flexibly on his desk chair with one leg over the other, reading that damn orange book. He didn't look at me and his body was facing towards me.

"I only knock when I feel like it and besides this is my room. I trust my instincts and I know when I should enter it or not. Anyway I brought you some dinner, eat it, or I'll strap you to a chair and shove it down your throat." Said Kakashi with a bored tone as if everything I said was predictable.

I didn't argue back otherwise there would've been a dispute. He got up to leave the room. Before he exited it, he turned his head back to me.

"It was nice watching you contemplating, good night." He said with a tinge of interest and closed the door behind him. I growled and grabbed my pillow and threw it at the door when he just shut it.

"Stupid jerk!" I hissed.

Who does he think he is? Talking to me after the cold stuff he said! Watching me like I was some sort of animal in a zoo! I went to the table ate the ramen, grabbed my pillow threw it back on my bed, turned off the lights and went to bed. Within an hour I was deeply sleeping; dreaming of home; my bed; my siblings; my parents and my comfy room.


	10. Chapter 9

**Heya!! OMG I FINALLY FINISHED THE STORY I'VE BEEN WORKING ON FOR TWO DAMN YEARS!! I AM SO HAPPY!! (not fanfic) Anyway I decided to post maybe several chapies at the time - sorry if it's a crime against fanfiction net posting one chapie at the time - However I really think it's better like that. There are a HELL A LOT of chapters, not gonna tell you how many and sorry if the chapters itself are long, please bear with me. I gotta personally thank my readers who gave some reviews, "HK**" **was it? Thanks so much for your solid and big review!! You really made my day, gosh i was in such of a bad mood and when i read your thing it put the smile back on my face!! Anyway to all readers who review thank you very much. So now I will serve you the three main dishes chapter 9+10+11!! Enjoy!! REviews as always are appreciated!!**

* * *

**CHAPTER NINE**

-Extreme but unexpected changes-

From the fourth day on, a week and than a month dragged by painfully. "Painful" was the right word to summarise the whole month. I lived Hell on earth! It was pure torture and God knows how many bruises and scratches I've got. For a whole month my body was racking with muscle pain! Oh, God! The worst muscle pain ever! Every single muscle in my entire body was hurting even the joints, neck, chest, back, arms, hands, fingers, legs and even my ass! One morning was so extreme that I barely could get out of bed; I was paralyzed from head to toe. That day Kakashi – fortunately- abandoned the training and instead fed me the whole day like I was some sort of baby! That was so embarrassing! In the meantime my relationship to Kakashi didn't improve, it actually deteriorated. Instead of getting closer; we drifted apart, turning to a tacit relationship. Many times and in vain Kakashi tried to lighten up the atmosphere by starting a playful conversation, but I was the first one to give him an ice cold shower, by simply glaring at him or turning away from him. I think that could be the reason why I became "anti social". I felt Kakashi and I were separated with thick iron walls. Also several times I caught him staring at me, with his calculating look, it seemed like he was registering every single movement I made. Additionally another annoying habit of Kakashi appeared, he liked showing off. I know that doesn't sound like him, or maybe he wasn't showing off, but he likes expressing his natural self by walking around shirtless. So it made it all the time very difficult to look away. Only a few times I caught Kakashi actually what seemed like "smirking proudly" underneath his mask, when he saw me staring at him. Lately the trick doesn't work on me anymore. I'm immune to his "physical openness". Regarding the training, I must say I improved beyond my expectation and Kakashi grew steadily amazed by my hidden abilities. I think that the body I received had some hidden potential already in it and it developed as the story went on. I can use any basic jutsus and I am secretly trying to master "Kage Bushin no Jutsu" Shadow clone jutsu. It isn't such a success yet, but I'm practising. What I also took note of, was that my abilities to control water became stronger to the point that I could perform any water jutsus. Kakashi isn't aware of this and I believe it's best to keep it secret. I would say my strength doesn't lie in Gen jutsus that's for sure, but in Tai jutsu and Nin jutsus. I would favour to perform water jutsus, but never dared asking Kakashi, fearing it might create some suspicion. I think up till now Kakashi doesn't know what type of chakara I have and he still bothers me about it, by asking me some questions like. How do you feel when you do this and this and that? How does your chakara feel like? Also he wouldn't stop blabbering about the famous leave that feeds on chakara and can tell what type you are. Soon as he comes up with that stuff, I avoid replying or I bluntly start another conversation about the training. However one point is scaring me, mostly about my new body, it feels like it's bursting with energy and wanting to do more and more jutsus until I use up all of my chakara. I'm seriously worried about it and I didn't tell Kakashi as well. I forgot to mention the greatest part about the training; I've got the fittest body ever! I have muscles and god looking abdos! Above all things I've said one major and vital event happened. Sasuke left Konoha once and for all. As being part of the story I was quite shocked, but expressed no concern or no surprise at Sasuke's escape. Everybody was extremely down and I actually didn't meet Naruto and Sakura personally to witness their misery. I was only informed by Kakashi - who many times shared the latest news in Konoha - expressed his concern as a Team leader and a teacher. It did shock him, it was very evident, but I could tell that he also predicted this moment and just didn't want to believe it. Anyway I basically saw the whole anime and I'm not surprised at all. I never liked Sasuke, although I must admit that later he looks hot!

While this dreadful event happened, on the last week of the month, I was alone in the flat and had as a replacement an Anbu keeping watch on me. Kakashi had a serious S- Rank mission from Tsunade and of course he left me behind. Before he left he told me that soon as he arrived he would expect a fight against me, to check how much I've improved and he added "You could see that as an examination for getting the shinobi diplomat". I took that opportunity to train like crazy and mastered in secret the Kage Bushin no jutsu in no time. While having that dull Anbu patrolling me perched up a tree, I decided to try out my shadow clone on him. I was training on the water and suddenly dove under water. Minutes later my clone was swimming about and myself I was swimming under water to the far end of the shore. I was constantly on the watch making sure that I was far away from his eye vision and undetectable. Far away from him, I decided training myself properly and planning my moves against Kakashi. I tried front flips, back flips, ways of dodging an attack and remembering Kakashi's teachings word by word. I trained myself against a sturdy tree, punching and kicking until my fists and legs became numb. I was determined to improve independently without Kakashi's help and also to prove him wrong about me. This grew to a habit and throughout the week, I tricked the Anbu in numerous occasions. At the daily training, he wasn't the brightest guy, he was bored to death, I tricked him while I would go out in the night time to train some more by using Henge jutsu to transform into an old man and while my clone was still in the flat watching TV or doing some chores. In the nighttimes I would continue with the training and went back to the place where I punched and kicked against the tree. I could feel that I became stronger and stronger and I was nearly going insane for more! I was becoming greedy and lusty for more power.

I returned to the tree - the last night before Kakashi returned - to train some more. I heard the bushes rustling and I stopped dead in my movements. My heart was fearfully pounding against my ribs. All of a sudden two figures appeared. I was fortunate that the full moon was revealing the appearance of those strangers. One was two meters tall, very well built and muscular, wearing some traditional standard peasant clothes which was made of awful patch work and cuts and he had very sharp eyes and an ugly smirk. The other guy wore the same style of clothes; he was shorter and seemed more ferocious than the other. He was unhealthily skinny and bony; he had large black rings beneath his eyes but had a horrible toothless smirk. They carried some potato sacks - which were filled with some things. My first impression about them was that they looked like merciless robbers. They snickered at my presence.

"Oh look, Aniki (older brother). A girl is outside all by herself, what should we do?" asked the giant very slowly.

"Yea, I noticed, well let's take her with us, then, she could be an exciting entertainment." Sneered the thin guy and both walked in calm steps towards me.

I smirked silently to myself. Both of them grabbed each of my shoulder and as they tried to drag me with them, I grabbed them by their forearms and catapulted them instinctively backwards. Making them soar towards the lake that was at least ten meters behind me. I followed their cries and found them sprawled on their backs at the shore of the lake. The lake water reflected the pitch blackness of the forest and reflected at the same time the moon light on the calm motionless surface. The lake had a sombre and threatening appearance, a very uninviting one. The two brothers got up and tried again to attack me, but in vain. I held their fists firmly in my hands and I threw them in the water. I walked on the surface towards them. They pulled one of their most fearful faces and the giant one began whimpering.

"I wonder how many you've hurt so far. Judging by your appearance you are merciless thieves and maybe even rappers, am I right?" I told them with an analytical voice. Those guys were shrinking back from me.

"Aniki, this woman has the strength of a demon." Exclaimed the giant fearfully. I gave them a triumphing smirk.

"Thanks for the compliment; I'm hungry for some flesh." I said with a sinister voice and gave them a sadistic smirk, which made them whimper.

"Let's swim away quickly!" urged the thin guy and they swam towards the shore. I simply outstretched my arms pointing to the thieves.

"You aren't going anywhere!" I roared and suddenly the water grabbed both of the robbers and brought them to me. It was like two hands grabbed each robber and they formed to two separate towers of water containing the robbers. I snickered scanning my arms, discovering my abilities. As those towers stood in front of me, I eyed the thieves.

"Have mercy!" yelped both the giant and than the thin rat.

"Mercy?" I scoffed at their pathetic statement.

"Did you have mercy towards your victims? I seriously doubt that, which means DEATH!"

"Noooooo…" shouted both of the robbers, as I brought the towers together to form one.

Then with one hand I formed the tower to a floating ball and locked the robbers in a gigantic ball of water. Under panic they banged against the walls, but never managed to get out and then I suddenly squeezed my hand to a fist. Blubbering screams erupted from the ball and I heard a lot of cracking and shattering sounds. I watched as they scream the life out of themselves and I was actually laughing cruelly. They suddenly stopped screaming and floated motionlessly in the round container of water filled with blood. I snapped back to reality, releasing them and letting them fall in the water. Panting heavily I wanted to check if they were okay, so I walked over to them and I screamed with horror at the sight. Horribly, bloody and disfigured corpses with wide open eyes stared at my face. I realized that all their bones must be shattered; their fingers were bent back or broken in half, their legs as well. They were squashed from all sides. I shook violently and broke into a run back to the flat. I cried on the way, absolutely terrified of my behaviour. This wasn't me! Soon as I had stepped on the lake, I turned to a monster, I couldn't control myself anymore! I dashed as fast as I could back to the village, I was panicking and hyperventilating. I quickly transformed myself to an old man and went back to my flat. I entered the dark apartment and removed the clone. I turned the lights on and went to the fridge and drank a load of milk. Then I took a shower. Those images haunted my mind; I was shocked even traumatised about it. Right after the shower I got sick over the toilet. Those images of the corpses were engraved in my mind. I wish Kakashi would be back! I want him now! I want at least to see his face or hear his voice! Out of desperation I ran to Kakashi's room, switched on the lights and rummaged through his things and pulled out his Jounin shirt. I took off the remainder of my clothes and slipped into his shirt. I grabbed the covers of the bedroom and left the room to lie down on the couch. I covered myself well and consoled myself by inhaling Kakashi's scent and telling myself that I was defending myself. I cried myself to sleep and finally at dusk I could find peace.

Some low whispering woke me up, it was inaudible and not coherent so I had no idea who it was. I was too tiered to get up and check so I pulled the covers over my head and slept more. Then the sound of closing door was heard and the footsteps approached the living room and to me.

"Sara. Time to get up, its 6 PM." Said that familiar calm voice that I've longing for, who depending on his days can be lazy or cheerful.

I smiled to myself. Finally he's back! All of a sudden it made click.

"WHAAT?! It's 6 PM!" I realized and sat bolt up, pushing down the covers and I heard that typical ridiculously laugh from Kakashi.

I noticed he was kneeling beside me in front of the couch. He appeared quite worn out he had some black rings beneath his eyes and his hair was wilder than usual, but he was ACTUALLY cheerful enough to see me. He also studied my appearance.

"Why are you wearing my Jounin shirt and sleeping on my couch? Don't tell me you were lovesick." He sounded pretty hopeful and I gave him a stern gaze.

"Only in your dreams." I retorted sounding still a bit surprised of his direct humour.

"Then what is this all about?" he questioned further and pointed on the couch and his Jounin shirt. I took a deep breath.

"I had a horrible nightmare last night and well, uhm, I thought by wearing your shirt and sleeping in your couch, it could comfort me." I said shyly without looking at him with the colour rising up to my cheeks.

Kakashi looked at me, for a second I thought he showed a remarkable smile underneath his mask, but shook off that idea.

"Would you mind to get me something to drink and a cold wet cloth? Because I've got headache and my eyes are sore as hell." I asked him and he complied. While he was getting the stuff, he started speaking loudly.

"I heard you were training very hard."

"Was that your dull stalking Anbu friend, who told you that?" I asked.

Kakashi chuckled and he brought the cloth and drink to me. I gulped the stuff down quickly and lay myself back on the couch with the cloth covering my forehead and my eyes.

"He's dull, but a good fighter." Stated Kakashi with honesty and I chuckled to tell my opinion about him.

"Not the brightest though."

"Maybe." Replied Kakashi as if he wasn't sure.

"I tricked him several times, without him noticing it." I said with amusement and boasting myself.

"Aha, like what?" inquired Kakashi with curiosity, as I had my eyes covered I had no idea how he was responding to that.

"Actually how was your mission? Did it go well?" I asked him suddenly, digressing from the topic.

"It was successful, just had to remove a lot of obstacles." He answered very simply. There was a brief moment of silence, when Kakashi yawned.

"I think I'll hit the sack," He yawned.

"However I have to remove the obstacle from my couch." He added calmly.

All of a sudden Kakashi lifted me up in a bridal style and I let out a yelp.

"Ahh! What are you doing?" I yapped and I felt Kakashi's low rumbling laughter against his chest. I removed the cloth to see what was going on. I stared blankly at Kakashi; he was actually carrying me… in the bridal style? What the hell happened to him?

"You didn't have to carry me you know, I could have walked." I told him and he gave me that logical face.

"If I had asked you, I don't think you would have moved." He stated as a matter-of-factly.

"Well you know me better than myself." I chuckled.

Kakashi's eyes crinkled cheerfully and went back to the living room to get the covers and gave them to me.

"I'll get my stuff if you don't mind, for taking a shower." He mentioned and I showed no objections.

I covered myself and watched each of his movements. Why was he abnormally so friendly? Did he get drugged? Kakashi finished getting his stuff and exited the room, before closing the door he peeked in.

"Because of your hard you can sleep as long as you want, but tomorrow we will fight, right?" said Kakashi sounding a bit excited. I nodded.

"Good night." He bade me and when the door was about to get closed, I called his name.

"Kakashi."

"Yeah."

"Are you sure you are okay?"

"Yea, why?"

"You are just very happy; did you take drugs?"

"I'm just happy to be back and have a good sleep."

"Aha, ok, good night, then."

"Good night." Was his last word and he closed the door completely.

I closed my eyes and I was already in slumber land.

I woke up the next morning very early. My eyes were still sore and like a thunder striking a nearby tree, the images flashed in front of my eyes. I gasped to myself and shut tightly my eyelids, muttering desperately "It was only a nightmare!" All of a sudden there was some pounding at the main entrance.

"Yea, yea, I'm coming." Followed Kakashi's lazy voice and I jumped out of bed with pounding heart beats and trembling legs and a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. Did they discover the bodies? I dashed out of the room and joined the astonished Kakashi looking back at me, then back to the door. Like always he was shirtless and I was only wearing his Jounin shirt. He stood in front while I was in the back. Kakashi opened it, a shinobi with a scarred face appeared. If I'm not mistaken it was the one, who was the guard of Sarutobi before he died and of course I didn't know his name. He carried some thick steel rings on his index finger and the other on the ring finger. He was out of breath and was anxious about something. He exchanged looks with Kakashi and I, scanning our appearance briefly and with a hint of embarrassment, he looked back at our faces. I hid myself more behind Kakashi, only peeking from behind his back.

"I…Hope, uhm, I didn't disturb you in something, Sempai?" Began the shinobi with a tinge of embarrassment in his voice and looking at us indirectly.

Kakashi and I exchanged confused looks with each other and suddenly it dawned to us both, what he exactly meant as we briefly realized his odd behaviour and our momentary appearance. Oh….Shit! I could clearly see a glint of amusement in his one eye and I turned away from him, hiding myself behind his back, covering my red face.

"You didn't." replied Kakashi with simplicity.

"Spit it out, what happened?" said Kakashi suddenly in a grave tone.

"Two corpses were found at the lake." He stated.

"What?" Both I and Kakashi blurted out with horror at the same time, we glanced at each other and looked back to the shinobi.

Finally I gained the courage to step aside from Kakashi's back and stand beside him. The information was shocking and my predictions and fears were right, this was bad.

"Hokage sama demands for your immediate presence." Told the shinobi sternly and Kakashi nodded in response.

"I'll join you in a minute; inform Hokage Sama that I'm on my way." The shinobi nodded and vanished in a puff of smoke.

Kakashi closed the door and then faced me. A ridiculous chuckle escaped from him.

"Where the hell did he get that idea?" wondered Kakashi casually and my cheeks turned pink. Oh, man! Anything but that! I turned my head away, stepped away from him with my back facing his direction.

"I'm sharing the apartment with you and it long doesn't mean that we did, "that"!" I said bitterly, trying to cover up my embarrassed self.

"That could be a good point, but judging by our appearances," he pointed to my pyjamas, which covered my upper body to my thighs, his naked chest and his pyjama pants. Additionally he pointed to his hair and mine and our tiered faces.

"That gave him some idea that we did "it". Lastly but not least, judging by your extremely shy and embarrassed behaviour and you hiding behind my back. Yes, that gave him the last evidence that we did have sex."

All this he explained with extreme casualness, as if it was some daily thing for him. I digested everything with discomfort and I bet all the blood shot to my face. I watched him completely speechless. Now my mind began to display this and I shook my head with disgust, to kick out those disgusting images.

"Beurk!"

"What "Beurk"? I guarantee you I am good at it!"

"Now that I didn't have to know!" I sighed with annoyance and Kakashi marched towards me.

"Seriously, I am!" he insisted calmly, but then he started coming closer to me and I backed up against the wall, pressing myself far away from him and lowering my face to the floor. I wasn't expecting any of this. Next he grabbed my chin with his thumb and index finger and raised it to meet his eyes. He brought his face so close to mine, that I could feel his hot breath against my face. My heart was pounding against my ribs, my stomach did a summersault and I felt my legs turning to jelly. What the hell is happening? He never is like this… Or should I say, maybe he did take some drugs or was drunk or something - because didn't he use to be so cold towards me?

"Let me demonstrate." He breathed and his thumb left my chin and slithered up to my mouth; at the contact of his thumb against my lips my breath hitched. His mask revealed a crinkle; he was smirking and taking advantage of my helplessness. He skilfully drove his thumb over my lips, keeping his eyes locked with mine. He could easily tell that I was paralyzed from head to toe and that each of his touches affected me strongly. He clearly felt it while I was breathing heavily against his thumb. There was something wrong with his eyes, they were expressing something that was very unknown to me, but I recall seeing it in Animes or Mangas. Those eyes filled with longing or desire, even Passion…. Passion? Wait, a minute! This isn't right! That's not him! What the hell is he doing with me? Does he love taking advantage of people's weakness? Although my body was screaming for more, I couldn't do this, not now where I don't know him at all. Maybe he's the type of guy that ditches the girl after one night. My sane self told me to shove him away or something. I noticed Kakashi's other hand, which rested beside my head, it rose to his face and pinched the mask and slowly tried to pull it down. I chuckled against his thumb and he looked at me with confusion, stopping in his actions.

"I saw your face already. Actually I saw it on the day you had your hang over. I saw nothing special about it, just a normal face that you would expect from any guy. I bet all women in Konoha would pay millions to see your face uncovered, not to mention your students as well." I said against his thumb and regain control over my body and senses.

"I realized you like taking advantage of people's weakness, mostly of women who are tempted by your appearance. You tease them and fake all those emotions filled with passion and desire, making them believe that you actually feel something for them. I find that cold and disgusting!" I spoke at first overconfidently, but the last sentence I strengthen my tone and showed I disliked his approaches.

"I'm impressed by your manner of filtration and seduction, but they don't work on me. I'm not naïve; I'm not stupid to let myself into all this. You are playing around, trying to see where is the limit of your victim and you ask yourself whether you should go beyond or not." He hasn't spoken a thing since.

He was frozen, I felt like I was able to read his mind and foretell his actions.

"Kakashi, remember your position, if the Hokage knew this, you'd be giving back your shinobi licence. Remember we still have to fight." I added with superiority. Kakashi was coming back to his senses.

"What do you prefer Kakashi; Torment me or investigate the two corpses at the lake?" I questioned him and I waited for a reply. Kakashi slowly came back to himself and he pulled his hand away from my face and drew himself back entirely. He chuckled in a proud manner and eyed me in his arrogant way.

"I must admit, you surprise me more and more and you become very interesting as it goes on. I'm looking forward to our battle, this afternoon." He left me leaning against the wall to collect his clothes and put them on. Before he left, I called for him.

"I warn you already, don't toy around with me like this ever again, you hear me! I won't let you trample on me like this and treat me like trash! I tell you, you will get to feel this at our battle!" I scolded him bitterly and he gave a conceit chuckle.

"I won't hold back either." He supplied and left the apartment for good.

I leaned heavily against the wall and slid down until my butt made contact to the floor. That bastard! Who the hell he thinks he is! Trying to assault me with his sensual behaviour? Has he lost his mind! He scared me! I never knew he was like this, taking advantage of the weak, so full of himself and cold! I got up stomped to the bathroom, stripped down all my clothes and went into the shower. As the hot water cascaded down my back, this moment was relived a billion of times. My body was under the same influence as before; I still could feel his thumb brushing over my lips and his eyes looking at me. He was seducing me, no toying around with me! It was painful to know his intentions behind this, I began to hate him and it cost me many tears to think like that. I didn't want to see another face of Kakashi that was unknown to me; I should have never come here and never admired him since the beginning. Why am I so weak towards men? Why? Why is he such a bastard? Why does he cause me to hate his presence and voice? I was so naïve to have ever imagined that an insensitive cold bastard like him would ever get close to me! I'm human and he doesn't exist! None of this is real! Maybe the next morning I'll wake up and find it to be all just a stupid dream. I got out of the shower, dressed myself up and headed to the kitchen to prepare myself some breakfast.


	11. Chapter 10

**CHAPTER TEN**

-The battle which will change everything-

Within two hours, Kakashi came back. He was in deep contemplation and seemed very preoccupied about something. I just bet he was thinking about, who did it and why? I was constantly afraid that he might suddenly accuse me and lock me away in a cell. Also the shocking "event" that happened this morning, seemed forgotten for good. Additionally what made the atmosphere ten times tenser was that he ignored me the whole morning and I lost my courage to look at him straight in the face. He sat in the living room in front of the table with a glass of milk beside his notes and pondered deeply. From time to time, he scribbled some things down and contemplated some more. Wow! That guy is very intellectual; he takes it very seriously and if his students would see this, their mouths would be on the floor. I got bored of observing him so I retreated back into the kitchen, to prepare lunch. Not a sound and nor his presence appeared in the kitchen, not once. This thing must be eating him up like mad. On the other hand I didn't feel any better, I was filled with regret and guilt and this burden became heavier and heavier. I wonder how long I would be able to keep this for myself. I'm scared. There are strange changes happening to my body and it freaks me out, like another thing was living inside my body. The thought of it send a chill down my spine. I brought Kakashi's meal to the living room and placed it next to his notes and took the empty glass with me. Not once did he look at me; it was like I was some sort of ghost floating around in his flat without him taking any notice of it. With the glass in my hand, I turned my back on him and began walking out of the living room.

"Sara." Kakashi called in a serious tone and I stopped in my steps.

My heart pounded with fear, did he find out? I turned around slowly and he eyed me out of the corner of his eye.

"We will have this fight later this evening, get prepared, I won't go easy on you."

I nodded nervously and quickly diverted my eyes to the floor, because his gaze was very strong and penetrative. I turned away and left the room entirely to eat my meal in the kitchen.

Hours passed by and I grew more and more anxious, every single thing tortured me. Kakashi left the apartment to give his newly written report about the case to Tsunade and then he came back with another pile of folders and went through them. I found myself in those tormenting hours in the bedroom, trying to read something or draw. Although doing all of this, still didn't cool me down, I was stressed as never before. I felt like I was going to face my death sentence any moment. All of a sudden Kakashi just barged into the room, out of startle I fell backwards and hit the back of my head on the floor.

"Ouch!" I grunted and pulled my legs to the floor and sat.

Kakashi looked at me confused.

"What was that suppose to be?"

"Can you not for ONCE, knock on that SHITTY DOOR? Ouch! Shit! Now I've got a hell of a bump, because of YOU!" I snapped furiously and his response was an arrogant chuckle.

"Then why were you sitting with your back at the edge of the bed?"

"Duh! You scared me and I fell back!"

Kakashi calmed himself down and gave me a serious look.

"Let's get this thing behind us, shall we?"

My response was a nod and we shortly after left the apartment. We arrived at our usual training ground and this time, he made sure we weren't even close to water! Each of us gave a huge distance between another and I went into my fighting pose with my fists raised near my face. Kakashi stood with his hands in his pocket, not getting the slightest prepared.

"There are no rules, so you can use weapons and any sorts of techniques you want. The battle will finish if only one of us stands or one of us gives up." Declared Kakashi and he kept his Sharingan eye covered.

"You are not going to use it?" I realized and pointed to my left eye.

He shook his head and revealed a serious face, but I could tell that he was confident enough that he will win.

"I don't think I'll need it, after all - it's only you."

"Don't underestimate your opponent sensei a golden rule in the shinobi teaching, right?" I scoffed.

"After all a week worth of training has great value and I know I will beat you."

I could tell by the crinkle on his mask that he was smirking at my statement and he made a hand movement, that I should attack him. I pulled a kunai from my hip pouch and with determination I charged towards him. Kakashi had still his hands in his pockets and while I was about to strike he pulled out in a split second a kunai and blocked my attack.

"Oh, who's underestimating the opponent, now?" Scoffed Kakashi pressing himself against his kunai and I struggled against mine too with difficulty.

I quickly gave him a kick with my leg, but he caught it with no difficulty.

"Ts ts." He clicked with his tongue.

"Like this won't do." He said over confidently and suddenly grabbed my leg and turned me in circles and let go of me.

I shot through the sky and crashed back first on the ground, taking down a tree. I lay there, making all possible painful grimaces. My poor back!! Tomorrow it'll hurt like hell. I crossed my arms over my chest. Well he's all serious about it; I bet he was waiting for that the whole time.

"Are you going to lie there the whole day, thinking about how bad you are doing?" Kakashi leaned with his sides against a tree beside me, since when was he there? He walked over to me and kneeled down next to me, resting his hands on either side of my head. Okay…. What's with the hands? Kakashi's head hovered an arm length over face and clearly some triumph was visible in his eye.

"Are you giving up?" wondered Kakashi hopefully and all of a sudden an idea dawned to me. It was definitely going to be a success.

"No, but I am resting my back, hope you got no problem about it." I replied comfortably and Kakashi gave a confident chortle.

"Resting your back? Are you giving up already?" Said Kakashi sounding more hopeful and overconfident.

Jerk! By now I would be rolling my eyes, but I had a plan, so I must stay focused. With a grunt I supported my weight with my elbows and came centimetres close to Kakashi's face. I raised my gaze to meet his eyes and then raised my hand to rest on his face. He raised his brow in confusion and surprise.

"What are you doing?"

"Taking advantage of our position now and continuing what you began this morning." I uttered and wetting my lips in a seductive manner.

His blank eye stared at me with disbelief and slowly he was distracted by my behaviour. I had to play along for a little more. With the tip of my fingers I traced a slow line from his cheek along his jaw line. I skilfully caressed his face and I could tell he shuddered at the contact of my fingers. Myself I was ecstatic about doing this and triumphed at my near success. I took my time caressing his other cheek and finally I was beneath his chin. He stared at me the whole time with that blank eye; also he seemed to be repressing his feelings. Now with my thumb I drove over his clothed lips. I could feel his hot shuddering breaths. Oh la! I didn't know I could overpower him that easily! I think I must be hallucinating! I smirked internally. This was it and suddenly I pulled up my legs and with my feet I shoved him powerfully forward. He soared through the air and by bouncing myself against the trunk of the tree, I caught up with him. I punched him right and left and then in the stomach, he was too stunned to respond and crashed back first against the trees, tearing them down with him. I landed lightly on my feet, content of my success. I chuckled with triumph. I heard no more movements, I focused myself on searching his chakara, and his presence still was lying over there. Finally I heard some movements coming from over there and there was Kakashi coming back on his feet. He leaned forward on all fours, letting his arms support him. He panted and with one breath intake, he was back to his full height and walked away from the destroyed landscape with his hands in his pockets.

"That was very naughty of you. I think I should put one rule up. No seducing teachers." He declared with a calm tone, but he surely was annoyed by my tactic, I hurt his pride.

"You said there are no rules, I simply used any method possible to win." I defended myself proudly with a smirk. He chortled at my statement.

"You are very interesting indeed." He mentioned and I smirked proudly as a response. He rubbed his cheek, where I punched him.

"Good punch, didn't expect that from you," He admitted.

"But you are no better!" Then he vanished into thin air.

I glanced in the air, in front of me and then on the ground. I rolled up my sleeves and concentrated all chakara in my fist and punched with all my strength on the ground. Cracks spread out and fragments of earth shot into the sky and the ground shook violently. A figure bounced out of the whole thing and landed meters away from it. Kakashi rested a knee on the ground and looked at me.

"Where the hell do you get all this strength from?" he interrogated me, while he stood on his full height and I shrugged.

"Are we gonna talk or fight?" I questioned him, but his respond was to charge towards me with full force.

He gave an upper cut and I dodged it and a lower cut and I dodged it as well by performing a back flip. He continued but I kept dodging it, it was like I could predict all his moves. All of a sudden I caught one of his fists and the other and with that I did a shoulder throw and he fell on his back. I must say that it was easy. Suddenly it struck me and I took a kunai from my hip pouch and rammed it into Kakashi's chest. A grunt emitted from him and all of a sudden he disappeared in a puff of smoke. A clone? I sighed.

"Kakashi, stop analyzing my movements from far, why not analyze them from here." I called out. I glanced attentively around me at each tree, I closed my eyes to feel his chakara and I snapped my eyes back open and I threw a shuriken behind me. I made a back flip backwards to take some distance. The leaves rustled and Kakashi jumped down from the tree.

"After you crashed over there, you quickly preformed a cloning Jutsu and let him do the talking and fighting, while you analyzed each of my movements. Can expect less from a Jounin of high class; however your tricks are getting old." I explained to him and he was slightly impressed by my manner of thinking.

"Kakashi, you are holding back, be serious. I'm getting bored."

"Bored? It only has begun, Sara."

All of a sudden, I was encircled by a tornado of flowers and I felt somewhat drowsy. My senses were clouded by something that I couldn't identify, but I knew that I felt sleepy and I sunk to the ground. I awoke in a midst of a black dimension. Not a sound was heard nor a smell could be scented. It was a cursed place. Out of the blue the whole thing transformed into the living room of my home. The fear shot up in my guts and I was already paralyzed. I knew the jutsu that should remove the Genjutsu, but I was too frozen to move a muscle. Then the young robbers appearance emerged from behind the sofa and like a tiger that pounced on his prey, he nailed me to the floor. He snickered with triumph.

"How cute, a girl is protecting the house. This is going to be interesting." I shook my head fearfully, oh my God, no! Not this again! Please not!

"Stop it, you sick twisted thief!" I roared and abruptly he took possession of my lips.

I could feel the pressure of his hot body on mine and he took advantage of it to let his tongue glide into my mouth and explore the insides. I felt the dread burning in my system bringing me on the verge of getting sick in his mouth. His sickening heart beats pounded through my ribs nearly choking me and his hands began to explore my body. I felt like being chained up against something and that he had the power to do anything to me. I struggled as much as I could against him, but he laughed evilly at each of my attempts. This isn't real! It's only a Gen Jutsu, Kakashi wants to trick me! It was no use, no matter how many times I said this, it felt realer than usual. All that pain racking my body, the dread of he hurting me was there. He groped at my chest and I screamed and slapped him, but he continued. His hands finished with my upper body and already made its way to my lower body. I was beside myself and going insane. Then he made contact at one area and it made "click" I screamed with all my guts and shoved him away. His figure flew across the room. I tremblingly got up on my feet and walked to the thief, who whimpered. I grabbed his face and squeezed my hand together. Blood shot all over my face and I did a hand sign calling "Kai". I awoke instantly and found myself still trembling violently, I reached to my face, and I was covered in sweat and tears. I suddenly gasped with terror, getting up and running behind the tree to get sick all over the ground. I leaned myself against it, to gain back my senses and wiped with the back of my shirt my mouth clean. I eyed from the corner of my eye Kakashi. I turned to him and by God; I didn't carry a happy look. Kakashi stood at the same spot and looked at me, somewhat looking regretful and guilty. I was angry, angry as ever and Kakashi should feel it! I charged towards him with high speed. I attacked him straight, bombarding him with punches and kicks, which he managed to dodge with difficulty. He was more surprised at the look I carried then at my moves. I wanted to make him suffer. I turned to a bitter living fighting machine. Kakashi received several punches and kicks, but still could stand his ground.

Slowly the night broke, we fought for several hours and I was still running like I was on fire. Kakashi was getting tiered. Finally after doing a reckless move, Kakashi had his opportunity and punched me strongly across the face and in the stomach. I found myself in a pile of torn off trees and I got up, Kakashi watched my every movement. I spat the blood on the ground and wiped my injured lip. An unforgivable pain racked my body, I sunk to my knees and clutched my frame with shuddering painful gasps. It was night now, the sky was starless but the gloomy moon poured its gleam over us. Kakashi advanced towards me, but with my strong will I got up, going violently against my injured body. I attacked Kakashi with my last strength and pushed him down to the ground; I fell on top of him and punched left and right across his face. I could tell my strength was leaving me. Kakashi grabbed my wrists flipped me over so that he was on top of me, but I flipped him again over so that I was above him. Then lastly he forcefully turned me over and pressed my wrists against the ground. I struggled against him in a frantic matter, I tried hitting my forehead against his, but he was an arm length away from me. My helplessness against him was very evident. Kakashi remained grave.

"Get off of me, bastard! I'll kill you! I'll kill you!" I spat angrily at him and suddenly Kakashi punched me across the face. I stopped dead with my head turned aside.

"What's the big idea? Are you planning to kill me?" Scolded Kakashi tightening his grip on my wrists.

"This was only a fight to see your improvements, not "killing each other" session!"

I couldn't find my voice; it was drained by my emotions. The tears came down in streams down my face and I began to sob quietly. I turned my head to face his, his eyes widened at the sight of my drenched face.

"You cruel cold hearted man! You've got absolutely no idea, what you did to me! What you transformed me into!" I cried with a knot of emotions in my throat.

"I'm not a shinobi! How could you ever understand how I feel?"

Kakashi instantly released my hands and pulled away from me and sat on the ground with his back facing me. I crouched on the ground and pulled my hands to my face to cover it and cried. Why did he do this to me? Does it entertain him to see me in this vulnerable position? Watching me suffer like this? Does he enjoy this?

"You saw everything. I hate you, I hate you for this! I won't forgive you ever again!" Kakashi's back twitched at my words, showing some signs that my words had some impact on him. I got on my feet. My whole form was trembling, not only from the chilly night breeze, but from the things I've experienced in this battle.

"Go find yourself somebody else to torture, because I'm not doing this anymore!" I broke into a run and headed back into the village of Konoha.

I hopped along the roofs and entered Kakashi's apartment. That jerk! I dashed to the bathroom, stripped myself naked and went into the shower. My breath hitched painful, when the hot water cascaded down on my bruises, scratched and cuts. My quiet cry turned into loud sniffs and sobs filled with frustration and pain.

"I can't take this anymore! I want to go back home! Mom, Dad and the other guys, please save me! Take me away from this wretched Hell! I'm being tortured, pushed around and humiliated!" I mumbled under my heavy sobs.

The hot water beating and splashing on my skin couldn't be felt anymore and instead turned into needles stinging me, reviving every memory of my time in Konoha. Anger, frustration, disappointment, sadness, humiliation and minor moments of happiness, all my misery covered any happy moments. What is my purpose of being here or what is my purpose of living?

The next morning I awoke at the sound of movements in my room, I saw through my blurred vision, a tall figure with silver hair, rummaging through some things. I knew who it was and as a result I fell back asleep. I slept the whole day, my body was still in pain from the fighting and also mentally I wasn't prepared to face Kakashi yet or ever. He had to exaggerate his whole Gen jutsu, picking out a weakness that only he knew! How cruel of him! My opponents, who I don't know, wouldn't know that I was nearly raped! Because I don't think I would be open enough to tell them, unless I'm drunk and gone completely berserk! What was the big idea anyway? Wasn't it supposed to be a fight, testing out my abilities? Then why exactly did he have to revive that nightmare again and control it, making it billion times worse? What the hell was he thinking? If he thought by doing thing this it could make me stronger, he was wrong, instead it turned me to a monster. In the Gen jutsu I killed the guy with my bare hands! I only could fight the Gen jutsu only when it reached the damaging point and HE…. Just watched, like it was some sort of TV show! Kakashi used that same Illusion on Sakura, he made Sakura believe that Sasuke was dying. You'd find Sasuke with a twisted leg and stabbed by tons of kunais maybe stabbed by Senbons, I'm not so sure...Anyway what he did was unforgivable! I mean I should have expected all of this, why am I surprised or hurt by it? Isn't it normal around here to pick on each other's weaknesses? I pulled the covers down from my face and body, sat up and turned around to stare out of the window. I clutched the collar of my pyjama shirt, which was still Kakashi's Jounin shirt and lowered my head. Then why does it hurt? Why does my heart hurt? Why do I feel betrayed? I don't understand any of this! My tears came flowing down again, this time I was sure it won't stop. I felt lonelier than usual. I had nobody to talk to, nobody to listen to me and nobody to understand me. Those feelings grew and grew and slowly I began to reject everything around me. Food I wouldn't touch, I wouldn't leave the room nor talk to anybody.

It went on for two whole days like this and on the third day, Kakashi couldn't take it anymore. He barged into the room, facing my back, while I remained immobile staring out of the window.

"This is ridiculous, Sara! You seriously think that by not eating, barely drinking and not talking you can solve everything? What has gone into you?" Scolded Kakashi with a strong voice, but I remained motionless and my gaze didn't once waver from its spot.

How can I expect to respond to him? All of a sudden I was wrenched around by my shoulders to face Kakashi's angered face. It knocked all breath out of me. Briskly I was overcome by an attack of dread, causing me to shove him away, leap out of bed and crouching against the wall with my hands defensively covering my face.

"Don't hurt me, don't hurt me!" I whimpered in the most fearful voice I've ever heard in my life.

My breath shuddered and my body trembled. What was happening to me? Why am I afraid of him? My horror stricken eyes stared at him. For some strange reason, I felt like I was going to be hit by him. His facial expression I could never forget, he was frozen still and he stared at me with wide eyes, clearly overwhelmed and bewildered at what just happened. I whimpered fearfully and started crying without seizing. What drove into me to react like this? Since when did I fear him so much? I buried my face, hiding my tears and fear behind my hands. I was frustrated with myself. I think Kakashi stood there for a while, digesting what just happened and then he clenched his fists to grasp the situation. With a frustrated groan he left the room. That was the last time I saw him today.

On the fourth day the feelings exacerbated, I began to hate everything that was around me, including myself. I was angry and depressed, an awful combination. I felt like beating the hell out of Kakashi and on the other hand felt like sulking in a corner till I die. I was desperate! I was craving for attention! I was craving to talk to somebody, but there wasn't anybody, nobody! The feeling of homesick overcame me, causing more instability in my mind. I was going insane! The nightmare followed me everywhere, even while I was awake. I was berating myself over and over again, accusing myself for being such a sadist. I heard voices in my head, disputing with one another about my mistakes and weakness. They were putting me down and down. I wasn't being accepted for what I am, not wanted nor…Loved. What am I doing here? I was overwhelmed by all sorts of strenuous and complicated thoughts that it made me get up and throw things around. No matter how much I broke or threw things, my frustration never left nor through shouting, I couldn't get rid of it. I clutched my head. Those thoughts… Leave me alone! Go away! I abruptly jumped to my feet, left the room to proceed into the kitchen. I've got to find something that will stop this madness! I rummaged through the cupboards, pushing things down as I go, letting them fall or shatter on the floor. I didn't find anything! Because of my frantic steps I slipped on something and fell on my back. The breath was knocked out of me and I gasped for breath. While I tried to sit up, I gasped when I felt a glass splinter penetrate my skin. I turned my head to my right hand a pool of blood formed underneath my hand. I scanned the rest of my body and realized that I've received many cuts from the splinters and blood was splattered in many areas on the tiled floor. My body went numb against the pain and I raised my right hand and inspected it. Blood. The burden on me didn't go away and I found a way to get rid of it once and for all. I took one shard of glass brushed over my wrist. I smiled the last time. I slit my wrist. Blood seeped out of my wrist, my vision became blurry and the kitchen began to spin. I let go of the shard and lay myself back down on the cold tiled floor. Tears trickled my face - despite that a hellish pain racked from my wrists and the blood leaked out of my wrist – I kept a smile. I stared at the ceiling with my sight failing gradually. It's better to leave this place; maybe I might end up coming back home and seeing my family again, their smiles, laughs and welcoming embraces. My energy drained out of me very quickly then expected, I turned over and before loosing my eye sight I caught faintly a blurred figure approaching me and no sooner I plunged into darkness leaving all that I've got behind me.


	12. Chapter 11

**CHAPTER ELEVEN**

-Back to him-

Hovering in the darkness without end, my life flashed by in front of my eyes. My Birth, Childhood, Teenage hood and the Naruto World. I didn't accomplish anything, only for short moments I felt rejoice over my life, but the rest I felt depressed. Something told me that what I did was careless and that I could have accomplished more if I held on longer to life. A blazing light shone at the end, attracting my attention and automatically I headed there. A long tunnel with a bright exit, I felt there was something there, way beyond beautiful. A place that I definitely will feel accepted and loved. It was like the warmth of the sun radiating through me, warming up my cold heart and embracing me. All of a sudden voices echoed and I turned back believing those voices were behind me, but I saw nobody. Strange sounds of thudding, peeping, swooching noises mixed up with the voices.

"We're loosing her again."

"Hey, hold on! You are too young to die"

I recognize the last strong voice, but it vanished away soon after. My attention was directed back to the light at end of the tunnel. Unexpectedly a large pound knocked me down to my knees; it was strong, as if somebody slammed a hammer against my chest. I could barely breathe, what's that pain?

"Sara! Sara, can you hear me? It's me Kakashi, come back to us!" Called that voice strongly and my eyes widened.

I got up and broke into a run in the opposite direction, out of the tunnel. I fell down as if sucked by the gravity and landed firmly on something. The last thing I took note was my thundering heart beats and the rest faded.

I was bedded on something soft and the air smelled like disinfectant and other chemicals. Voices spoke and faded. I felt vibrations, movements and touches by somebody. I couldn't move a muscle, my body seemed to be paralyzed, all I know that from time to time I felt pain. Not mental pain, but physical pain. Finally all of the moving seized and I could sleep again.

Every now and then, I heard whispers in the background and somebody talking to me, was it a man? My body could feel and hear anything, but I simply wouldn't wake up. In those moments I felt somebody holding my hand, it was a strong firm hand yet it was slender and smooth in some areas. It gave me reassurance and wiped away any worries. I was amazed how much at ease I felt, I was actually happy to be back, to be still alive. I realized how much I still wanted to do before I die, like having a family. I listened attentively to the voices whispering and found out in what situation I was.

"She's in coma due to the blood loss. She should be out of the coma in a week at least." Informed the voice of a male doctor to another person who didn't seem to respond.

"For the moment, the best thing to do is to keep her company. At this rate she might come out of her coma earlier than expected. She's responding to her physical senses, but she needs time to get control over her entire body. Maybe by now she's listening." Added the doctor with delight and paused either to look at me or the person sitting beside me.

"Thank you, doctor." Thanked the second voice finally in a grave tone.

If I could smile, I would be smiling now. Even if I would be blind I could recognize that baritone voice. Living a month in the same apartment was worth a lot. Kakashi…I wonder how long you have been sitting beside me? Are you actually concerned about me?

"Hey, Sara, get quickly better ok, because I'm seriously bad at this." He admitted in a low tone, trying to cover his discomfort. I laughed internally. I noticed that Kakashi, but you must know that your presence is very comforting.

"By the way, you trashed my room and the kitchen really badly, so because of you I actually had to do some REAL housework. I hope you are proud of yourself." Added Kakashi in his usual lazy tone and I laughed again internally.

That's a thing he would say to hide his embarrassment.

"I mean the cleaning was pretty nasty, all the glass shards splattered with blood. I wonder what got into your head to do such a thing? Did you ever think how annoying it is for those who have to clean it up, Baka?"

I sighed internally. I can tell that he didn't like cleaning all this up, especially at the tone of his voice, which he tried to cover up always - there was some remorse in his voice.

"When you are back young lady, you'll get to hear me fully and clearly, but now I don't have guts to do it, especially at the state you are in now." He said at first in his teacher mode, but softened up his voice at the last bit of his sentence.

Could he really be that concerned? A long pause followed and then a long hopeless sigh.

"I don't say this to anybody or actually I never ever said this to anybody before, but, without you around is very boring. Although you are sometimes such a pain in the ass, I didn't realize that you are fun to be around with. So get better!" he spoke quickly and clearly with difficulty, and then hearing the sound of his chair nearly falling backwards he had left the room.

By now I was smiling internally. Kakashi does feel, he's not cold and it's a great relief to know.

The other days, I heard many more voices, but not from Kakashi. Either he found it difficult to come here or generally hated hospitals. I heard an energetic voice, accompanied by a girlish one who's inherited the bossiness of Tsunade. Those voices approached me and spoke to me.

"Hello, Handshin san, I'm Haruno Sakura and this is Uzumaki Naruto." Introduced the girl and she kept on talking.

"We are the students of Kakashi sensei, he spoke a lot about you recently and both of us became really excited to meet you." I was stunned that Sakura could keep on talking forever like she knew me, but I didn't hear Naruto's voice once.

Suddenly I felt some smaller, rough firm hands holding mine. He held it with such care like it was delicate to the point that it might shatter any moment.

"Onee san, get better, whatever you do, don't give up. Many of us are waiting for your return, especially Kakashi sensei. Truthfully I've never seen anybody that worried as him." Said Naruto in a calm and affectionate tone that would have moved me normally to tears.

This boy is amazing! He's got that gift to make friends with anybody he wants, as long as he sets his mind to it.

"Return soon as possible, please. Sensei is really worried about you." Pleaded Sakura in a rather anxious tone.

Was I making him worry too much? I had a mind set; I was going to wake up soon to stop Kakashi from worrying too much about me.

Two days passed since then and I still was holding strong, it must be my fourth or fifth day in coma. I had to recollect myself and try with my will power to wake up. Finally my eyes opened and the sun light blinded me shortly, I covered my face with my right hand. I spotted the bandage around my wrist and pulled a miserable smile. I can't believe that I nearly committed suicide and was revived. I was such a jerk! I was in a single room again just this time with no Jounins patrolling the place. I heard the door open and I shut my eyes and pretended I was in the coma still. Somebody came in with short strides and settled itself on my right, right beside the window. There was a pause. I couldn't peek and I still had no idea who it was. A smaller hand held mine gently and I instantly recognize it.

"Hey, it's me again Onee Chan. I hope you are okay today." He spoke calmly with some bitterness in his voice.

He turned my right hand around to see my bandaged wrist better. There was a pause.

"I wonder how you can throw away your life, when you are still very young. I don't know what your reasons were, but, you should know it might've made your family very sad and I believe Kakashi sensei as well. He cares about you a lot more than you think,"

"He can be lazy, strange and cold sometimes, but he's a good teacher. One can see that he went through a lot himself and he's a lot more compassionate then expected -

-I know." I interrupted him gently and holding his hand in mine.

Naruto's eyes nearly popped out of his head, his sad face faded away and replaced with a broad smile. With one eye closed and my raised index finger resting against my lips, I indicated to not alert everybody.

"When did you wake up?" he asked me, still disbelieved that I was awake.

"Just before you came in."

"Ah, so you heard -

- everything." I finished his sentence and he became a bit discomforted, but my hand grip gave him some reassurance.

"Thank you Naruto, for your words. It helped a lot to fight out of this coma." I thanked him sincerely and he grinned with pleasure.

"It was no problem." Then his eyes rested on my bandaged wrist and his face turned melancholic.

"Onee san, why did you try to kill yourself?" asked Naruto with concern and looking at me straight in the eye.

His sparkling aqua marine eyes expressed deep concern, which touched me once again deeply. I looked away from him and stared at the ceiling. I smiled.

"I guess I let my worries, fears and anger direct me into this." I answered sincerely and smiled at Naruto.

"Anyway I realize that my action was reckless, because I've got still a long life in front of me and still have a lot to accomplish." I told him with enthusiasm and withdrew my hand from his and rested on his head.

He made a surprised face.

"You are an amazing boy, Naruto. I'm jealous of your optimism, strength and empathy. I'm definitely sure with those elements you'll reach anything you want." I praised him with delight and slowly from being surprised he pulled one of his famous grins. All of a sudden somebody pulled the curtains back and there appeared Kakashi, bewildered. Naruto exchanged looks between Kakashi and I, we were staring at each other.

"Uhm, I'll go, see you soon, Nee san." He said and left the place in a rush. He knew it was an important moment for Kakashi and I. Thank you Naruto.

"You've got nice students, Kakashi. Naruto is the cutest and most caring person I ever met! I don't think he got that from you, or?" I spoke with delight and Kakashi still stood there, still bewildered and disbelieved that I was back.

I sat up and turned around to rearrange the pillows and I leaned back with a pleasant sigh.

"Stop staring at me like I'm some kind of ghost. Now sit." I ordered and finally he moved, but instead of sitting on my left he sat on my right, beside the window.

He instantly shot up from his chair to look out of the window burying his hands in his pockets. I watched him slightly amused. He seemed to be nervous. He sighed deeply and finally looked at me with a grave face.

"What gave you the idea to do this?" it burst out of him with impatience, which seemed to have burdened him, the last couple of days.

It was my turn to return a sigh, but he didn't let me give an answer.

"Don't you realize that it was something very selfish and foolish? You are only 18 and you think by putting an end to your life you can solve all your problems? How despicable! I feel like punching you!" Here we go again with his lecturing, but this time I listened and watched him attentively and cherished his words.

"How can you do this to your family and to your friends? Did you ever think how they might've reacted?"

"Simply put, Kakashi, you were worried about me." I stated straightforwardly and he stopped in his mid-sentence like he swallowed something unpleasant.

He turned his back on me to look outside.

"Baka, I wasn't worried, I was angry, that's all." He corrected me defensively.

He took his left hand out of his pocket and I took it as a great opportunity to grab it. Kakashi turned his head and eyed my hand sceptically. I held his hand firmly.

"It's okay to be worried, it makes you human." I reassured him with a bright smile and he looked at me. A soft sigh escaped from him.

"You are such a nuisance." He brushed off my hand and turned away for good and was about to leave the room. I grabbed the back of his Jounin jacket and gasped painfully, as the pain shot from my wrist.

"Thank you for staying beside me all this time and I'm…Very sorry." I told him sincerely and he didn't move a muscle.

"You shouldn't apologize, I should. I'm simply unfamiliar with all f this…"

His back hunched slightly expressing his remorse and I had the urge to hug him, but as I wasn't fit physically I couldn't budge.

Again he brushed off my hand without looking at me and departed.

"Kakashi, it was your voice that brought me back to life." I called one last time and I heard him stopping in his steps and resume seconds later, disappearing from the room. I smiled secretively and went back asleep. This was going to be a very interesting beginning.

In the recent days I've stayed in the hospital, I received many visitors varying from Naruto, Sakura and some of the Jounins, however rarely from Kakashi. Either he was ashamed to show up, or couldn't bare the sight of me bedded in the hospital. Anyway I doubt it was any of those options, but believing in it, lightened my mood and filled me with happiness.

In a short amount of time, I was released from the hospital and when I was outside of the building, there was no sign of Kakashi waiting for me. I wasn't the slightest angry or surprised by his absence, I was more or less expecting that. I sighed hopelessly and smiled secretly. How can I be angry at him? After all he brought me back to life and had been sitting beside me probably the whole time while I was in a coma. I cannot be at all angry at him, he might have a cold attitude from time to time, but deep inside he's very caring. Instantly I shook my head and gave an incredulous chuckle, I doubt he's like that, feeling guilty? Since when? I mean shouldn't shinobis have not a single bit of remorse over no matter what? I resumed my walking and contently made my way through the lively streets of Konoha.

Arriving at the foot of the apartment building, I ascended the stairs and walked along the hallway and stopped in front of the door to Kakashi's apartment. I took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

"Yea, yea, coming." Came a rather bored voice from behind the door, it unlocked itself and the door opened, revealing an untidy Kakashi in his Jounin attires except without his vest and his headgear. Instantly encountering my presence, he went from an astonished face to his usual lazy expression.

"Oh, they released you already?"

"Yea…"

For some odd reason I felt ashamed of talking to him or even looking him straight in the eyes, because he was staring at me in a piercing way. He didn't seem to notice my discomfort as he seemed rather preoccupied by something else and I felt that his gaze stared right through me. There was a moment of silence. I noticed his unusual silent and troubled behaviour so that I to broke the icy silence.

"Kakashi, are you all right?"

Kakashi looked at me, suddenly awakening from his contemplation and let me inside his apartment. He appeared untidier and absent minded and quite exhausted then before. What the hell was he doing in the past weeks that made him look so worn out? It dawned to me and I called for Kakashi, he only stopped in his steps and didn't bother to turn around. Only his back seem to express regret and sadness, the idea of seeing Kakashi like this, urged me to comfort him. So I embraced him from behind and buried my face in his warm and broad back. His muscles became tense and it seems he lost his breath. I smiled secretly to myself at how good it felt to feel his warmth.

"You know all the time when you appear troubled or sad, I feel like hugging you." I whispered in a gentle voice.

"I'm sorry for everything, Kakashi. Sorry for causing you so much trouble and worry, so please share your sadness and worries with me and I'll try my best to comfort you."

Kakashi seemed to have frozen to an ice block, he couldn't respond to any of my statements, this was all new for him and I knew that. I just hope I wasn't scaring or confusing him with this. All of a sudden he removed my arms, turned around and embraced me firmly. I was all too surprised to react, my arms hung down on each side. Kakashi was actually hugging me? A long sigh escaped from him.

"Why do your embraces feel so comforting?" He questioned in a whisper with a gentle voice, which made my heart jump and my stomach make a summersault.

I must be dreaming, how could Kakashi possibly hug me and why is he telling me that my hugs are so comforting? I was getting more and more confused.

"I should apologize I'm the one who drove you into doing this. If it hadn't been for my cold behaviour and that Gen jutsu, none of this would have happened."

His remorseful voice soothed me greatly and touched me so deeply that tears came down my face.

I leaned my forehead against his chest. Kakashi you've got no idea, how comforting you are, how you make me feel wanted and needed in this world.

"Your hug is also very soothing. Thank you so much." I mumbled and rested my head against his chest.

Hesitantly my arms made their way up his back and I wrapped them tightly around him to return the hug. We stood there silently in each other's arms, enjoying each other's comfort. Nevertheless I was still stunned of Kakashi's behaviour, it's not him, and he would never do that…Was it…really because of me…that he was like this? How could I possibly cause him to worry? I thought I was of no importance to him that I was only a mission. Then I must've misjudged Kakashi. It seems that this could've gone on forever, but Kakashi was the first one to pull back and release me and so did I. Finally he noticed my tear stained face and he raised my chin with his finger to gaze into my eyes.

"Why are you crying?"

I couldn't control my tears they just came down in flows and feeling uncomfortable of showing my tears I covered my eyes with the back of my palm.

"I'm not crying, I'm just so happy…I finally feel that I belong somewhere." I sobbed with a smile and Kakashi released my chin.

Then he rested a hand on my head, I stopped sobbing and looked at him. His eyes crinkled cheerfully and he patted my head in a brotherly way.

"Anybody would worry about you. Promise me not to do anything stupid again, okay? You can talk to me if you have problems." He reassured me in a very brotherly way, which made my tears come down like a waterfall.

Kakashi, you might not know, but you are my hero you saved me from death and pulled me out of the swamp of misery. You may not know, but you became the most important person in this world to me. I realized that my presence is important to you, your gentle voice, your hand holding mine I know it's true. I know you wouldn't dare express it, because it's unlike you and you prefer being discrete about it, but I don't mind. Your presence is already enough for me. I enjoy watching you smile and laugh; it fills my heart with happiness and erases all my worries and doubts about you. I cannot stop repeating to myself how grateful I am that I met you. I prefer our relationship to remain like this, so that I can watch you in secret.


	13. Chapter 12

**Heya everybody!! Sorry for not updating last week, I went on vacation with my family in France, actually in Cannes!! It was very beautiful!! I regarded this one week as taking a break from sitting in front of my laptop, so I didn't take anything with me and what prevented me to do otherwise was NO internet connection whatsoever!! So now I am refreshed and even more motivated to update y story. Thanks to those who reviewed, you guys have no idea how much it makes me happy. If my story can put smiles on your cute faces, there is nothing else in the world that could make me more happy. Keep reading and I'll assure you it will get better, that is, if you can bear with me, he he! + or - reviews always welcomed!! Here you've got chapter 12, ENJOY!!**

* * *

**CHAPTER TWELVE**

- Complication and realisation -

A week passed by since I returned from the hospital. It has been a very relaxing and cheerful week. Kakashi took good care of me and didn't interrogate me on my motives why I nearly committed suicide. We went shopping…Yea, I know, Kakashi and shopping?? I know he isn't the type, well at least he carried the bags and I actually got to spend his money!! All this was out of guilt, because I don't think he'd ever do that freely. As we walked along the crowded streets of Konoha, a dynamic and all too familiar voice called for Kakashi. Both of us turned around to find Naruto and Sakura grinning at us. They joined us.

"Hey Kakashi sensei, hey Nee chan!" called Naruto gleefully and Sakura greeted us as well with delight.

"Hi Kakashi Sensei, hi Sara san!"

"Hey!" Kakashi and I greeted in unison and we exchanged amused looks.

Sakura caught us exchanging looks and gave a suspicious look, but it didn't bother me further and Naruto was oblivious as usual.

"How are you Nee chan?" asked Naruto keenly and I gave him a grin with a thumb up.

"I'm great! I went shopping with Kakashi!"

Naruto's eyes widened with curiosity and confusion.

"Why?"

"Well I need to get some shinobi clothes and new stuff, as I will be living in Konoha."

"In the same apartment as Kakashi." Cut Sakura sharply across with one of her brows arched in suspicion, enough to render me a bit nervous.

With a nervous smile, I replied calmly.

"Yea, for the meantime, until I find an apartment."

If that ever would happen, because frankly speaking I doubt that would happen and actually I wanted to stay close to him. Kakashi kept his usual cheerful mask; he was conversing with his pupils. I glanced discretely at Kakashi. I wish that for an instant I could be invisible and stare at him. To my eyes he was handsome and perfect and suddenly reality came crashing down on me like a heavy boulder on my shoulders. Abruptly I diverted my gaze away from him, letting reality and the shame overcome me. What was I thinking? I didn't come here to fall in love with a guy; well I don't know why I came here anyway. He's an anime character, for God's sake! I'm a human! He doesn't exist! It'll only break my heart if this happens, how would I be able to adapt myself back to the real world after becoming a couple with him? How would my heart be able to bear this? How would I be able to forget him and love a real man? No such man as Kakashi exists. I must come back to earth and discipline myself! Just regard him as friend, even if you must suffer the worst! Suddenly a hand rested on my shoulder, startling me abruptly and I shrunk away from his touch. The three looked at me with confusion and a mixture of concern.

"Sara, are you okay?" interrogated Kakashi with concern

I nodded rather briefly; avoiding Kakashi's gaze and spoke rather quickly.

"Err, uhm - I'm not feeling so well - I'll, I'll go back already - see you."

I grabbed the shopping bags and dashed, heading back to Kakashi's apartment.

Panting and leaning heavily against the door, I stared on the floor with my eye brows furrowed with anger and desperation.

"Shit! I must pull myself together!!" I cursed and smacked my palm against my forehead while throwing the shopping bags inside my bedroom.

I sunk, back first, into my bed and covered my face with my forearms and released a groan. Then I clutched hand full of my hair, groaning with frustration. Why was I all of a sudden so mad? Was it the thought of getting hurt, angering me? Was it the thought of getting too dependent on Kakashi? What was it? This suffocating anger, pulsing through my veins, scared me. Promptly I marched to the kitchen and drank out of the faucet, believing it would cool down, but it didn't. My heart was pounding harder and harder against my ribs I thought it would jump out of my chest any moment now. My hands trembled and my legs grew weaker. What was going on here?! Then a suffocating and sharp pound brought me out of balance and I clutched my chest, gasping, groaning with unbelievable pain. My heart was beating so powerfully that it blocked from time to time my air pipes, causing me to gasp and wheeze. Something fiery grew in the pit of my stomach and seemed to climb up my systems. Suddenly a horrible malicious laugh echoed throughout the apartment.

"_You cannot escape your fate by suppressing this urge to kill, can you feel it? This lust for blood, this lust to kill."_ growled cruelly this fearsome voice which made my head feel like it was going to burst open.

"_You cannot deny me! I'm a part of you! Don't you remember the night you killed those pitiful beings? Oh, how you enjoyed this power, enjoyed to hear their cries and see them dying. Mouhahahahrr!" _

"_Yes, Sara! Don't you want to avenge on those who don't accept you? Want to hear them cry for mercy?"_

I shook my head, clutching my head and muttering underneath my breath in a panicked voice.

"No! No! Leave me alone!"

Rather briskly I felt hands resting on either side of my shoulder and shaking me. I snapped my eyes open to find Kakashi, staring at me earnestly.

"Sara, are you all right?" he demanded.

I stared at him still shocked of his presence, his piercing eye searching in the depth of my eyes hoping to find what caused this. For a split second, I had the urge to take my kunai and run it through him. Appalled by those thoughts, abruptly and harshly I shoved him away, taking distance from him, fearing that I might really kill him. I covered my mouth with my hand in absolute shock; Kakashi who knelt in front of me seconds ago was leaning against the wall. He grunted painfully and rubbed the back of his head, I had been too harsh with him. Now I had another reason to stay away from him, I wasn't allowed to develop feelings for him nor get too close to him. The tears came down in flows and shamefully I looked away from him and cried. I heard Kakashi's movements approaching towards me and I quickly shouted with dread.

"Don't come near me! I might kill you!"

Kakashi stopped in his movements, although I couldn't see his face, I could tell he was startled of my outburst.

"That's nonsense."

"Kakashi I'm not joking, please, just stay away from me!"

Kakashi groaned and suddenly I was engulfed in his embrace. I struggled against him.

"Kakashi! Quickly let go of me –before, before I hurt you!"

"Even if you try, I can defend myself!" he counter argued in a sharp tone.

Still I struggled against him, so afraid that I would hurt him, but he kept holding me tightly.

"I can't hold him back any longer he's too strong, he wants to kill, he wants to see blood!" I panicked with wide stricken eyes.

Kakashi instantly pulled back to look at me in the eyes with such serious intensity.

"Who?"

Overcome by dread I shook my head violently. Angry by my refusal he gripped my shoulders firmly and raised his voice.

"Dammit Sara! Stop being so stubborn and TELL ME!"

I stared at him, with my tears still rolling down my cheeks. Kakashi was angry, very angry, his brow furrowed with seriousness. With all the tension building inside of me I couldn't handle it anymore and shouted out of my system.

"I AM A MONSTER!"

"You are what?!"

"A monster Kakashi! I've got a monster living inside me, it wants to kill!"

Kakashi promptly let go of me and stood up, looking down on me, with disbelief and confusion in his eyes. Then tremblingly I got up to my feet, using the kitchen counters as a support.

"I've got a demon inside my body, Kakashi! And I'm terribly afraid of it!"

It seemed Kakashi was struck deeply by this truth, his blank eyes stared right through me and something dawned to him and he glared at me.

"So that's why you went crazy during our fight and that would explain why you learned so fast Nin jutsu."

I did not reply, the answer was written in my face and Kakashi gave a scoff, followed by a snort.

"Now I get it. You are actually a spy!"

I shook my head and moved away from the counter to stagger to him.

"Kakashi, I swear I am not!" I defended myself while he cornered me towards the entrance of the living room.

"You little…! You used me, to get stronger and unleash that demon of yours on Konoha!"

"No Kakashi! I had no idea that I had a demon inside of me, I swear! I never had one not until I entered Konoha!"

Too sudden I was slammed against the wall, blackness clouded my eyes shortly, and his hand gripped my throat tightly lifting me off the ground.

"Enough!" he shouted

"Stop telling any more lies, you spy! You acted well your part I must admit, I fell for your helpless personality, however you underestimated me greatly! You've used me and everybody in Konoha to get stronger and you deserve to die!"

The air couldn't circulate properly in my system and it was difficult to stay conscious but I had to tell him that I wasn't a spy.

"Kakashi…I mean it! I'm not a spy!"

"Shut up!" he shot with anger

Weakly I raised both my hands to desperately try to remove his hands from my throat. Panic grew and grew and death seemed to be floating over my head. Tears heavily rolled down my cheeks, I tried to smile at him.

"Kakashi if I would be a spy, then tell me why I nearly committed suicide, instead of destroying the city?"

Kakashi looked at me, coming back to his senses, realizing that he judged me too fast.

"It's because, I was ashamed and afraid! I killed the two men in the woods! I was so afraid I could harm everybody around me, especially you Kakashi!"

"Because I like you a lot Kakashi!"

Kakashi released me immediately, letting me fall to the floor. Coughing and croaking for air, rubbing my neck, I tried to breathe deeply getting some oxygen back in my system. I raised my head to look at Kakashi, who backed with a disbelieved and shocked face. I got slowly back to my feet, still trembling, I had to tell him my reasons for my near suicide, and it was the prefect moment since he lost his voice. I took a deep breath, to make my voice steady and I looked at him.

"I've been neglected and forgotten for too long, to the point where everybody rejected me. In my family, at School, I was treated as an outsider. The near-rape added more weight on my shoulder, however discovering a demon inside of me smothered me and drove me to slit my wrist."

"KAKASHI! I did that in order to protect YOU from getting hurt from that demon! I want to protect this village as much as you would!"

Kakashi stopped dead and he was just staring at me blankly. Noticing that it did affect him incredibly, I decided to add more to make it clear to him that I wasn't a spy.

"If I had been a spy, I would've killed you long ago; I might've destroyed the village by now. Do you really think I planned that you would find me in the river, half-way dead?"

"Would I really betray somebody I lo-" awareness caused me to slap my hand over my mouth.

With the blush rising into my cheeks, I ran out of the living room and shut myself in the bathroom. Grasping my heart and panting, I thought about what I nearly spilled out. I covered my mouth with horror. I was so caught up with my emotions that I nearly said, the three forbidden words. I stripped my clothes off and stepped into the shower. I have to wash those feelings off, before they cause chaos. I couldn't contain my tears and neither the weight that pressed on my shoulders and collapsed on my knees. The water mingled with the tears of desperation and infuriation. The problem was it was hard to admit that I was unbearably, helplessly and immortally in love with Kakashi and that nothing in the world could stop it.

I finished my shower and draped a soft towel around my naked form. I just realized I haven't brought a clean pair of clothes. I took notice of the strangling marks on my neck. It started to turn blue and purplish in some areas, where Kakashi's finger tips were. My body registered the pressure of his finger tips. I felt a bit angry about it and just unlocked the bathroom door grimly and marched into my room. When I closed the door behind me and turned around, I received a hell of a scare.

"What the hell are you doing in MY room?" I yelped and wrapped my arms over my chest defensively, despite that I wore a towel.

Kakashi took his eyes off of his book and looked at me with indifference.

"For your information it's still my room."

Finally he took notice of my appearance and seemed drawn into it. Annoyed by his presence and ignoring the effect that I seemed to provoke, I marched out of the room and brought back the remainder of the shopping bags back into my room and threw them on the bed. I let myself sink onto the bed with my back facing him.

"It's careless to run around, half-naked." He supplied in a bored tone.

The last bit that Kakashi pronounced gave me the chills. Did he have to exaggerate the bit that I was half-naked? I grabbed my towel and was about to take it off, but abruptly realized that I forgotten Kakashi was even in this room and the sound of the pages turning alarmed me of his presence. I didn't know how that happen, that was close!

"Next time better not run around like this anymore."

"And why not?" I retorted bitterly over my shoulder.

"Because I don't know if I could hold myself back." He whispered in my ear and I leaped, reflexively grabbing his shirt and pulling him down as I fell off of the bed.

I landed on the wooden floor, crushed by Kakashi's weight. I opened my eyes and was too startled to see what actually happened. I froze stiff, my heart screamed out of excitement and my stomach squirmed. A dark shade of colour rose to my cheeks and I lost my voice. Kakashi's head lay next to mine and his body covered mine entirely. I turned my head aside with my mind in complete disorder and didn't know what to do as my body was paralyzed from head to toe. However I had to admit and I was disgusted by those thoughts, that it felt good… I could tell that Kakashi was also a bit stiff and his quick breathing told me so, he pulled his face up. We looked at each other for what seems like hours, his black eye was piercing and filled by something that made my heart skip a beat. I had the urge to kiss him, but turned my head aside with more colour rising up to my cheeks.

"That's what I meant; it's for both of us disadvantageous, however mostly for…me." He suddenly spoke out gently with shuddering breaths.

The tone of his voice struck me so that with curiosity I turned my head back to him. His gaze captivated mine with ease.

"I'm sorry that I strangled you before. I don't know if you ever will forgive me, but truthfully I like you a lot as well."

Even more colour shot to my face and the words that I was prepared to say just washed away. My only response was to gape at him. He diverted his gaze and closed his eyes, seeming to struggle with something. With a sigh he pulled himself completely away and before he left the room entirely, he gave me an order.

"Get dressed, before you get a cold."

He exited the room and firmly closed the door behind him. I still lay on the floor, red in the face, breathing quickly and staring at the ceiling. My heart was still racing madly; I placed my hand on my chest and realized that the towel was partly pulled lower revealing half of my chest. With a shameful groan I pulled it higher up and stood up. I've learned my lesson; I never will run around like this again in my entire life! Tonight I'll definitely sleep badly.


	14. Chapter 13

**Here it is the next chapie!! Hope you enjoy it and of course thanks to all reviews!!**

* * *

**CHAPTER THIRTEEN**

- I hate you, you are the worst! But don't leave me! -

I was right; I couldn't get an eye closed. This awkward and embarrassing moment flashed in my mind, taunting me the whole night with the most disturbing dreams - if you know what I mean - and to my surprise Kakashi appeared equally as worn out as I was. We actually barely spoke to each other; we couldn't face each other either. However finally he was the first one to break the ice and we sat together in the living room, watching TV. He turned the TV off with the remote and looked across to me with his serious face.

"Let's forget about the whole thing, it was only an accident and I don't understand why we must treat each other with indifference."

With my nerves blowing up, I jumped up and spat at him.

"Yea, consider it to be an accident, okay! Now what else consider THIS to be an accident as well?" I pointed to my neck at the bruises of his hand marks.

Kakashi looked at it then diverted his gaze, clearly he felt guilty about it.

"Now what next, oh, sorry that I stabbed you "it was an accident"!"

Kakashi jumped up from his chair and gave me a scowl, while arguing back with fury.

"How would you react, if somebody you spent months with finally turns out to be a spy?!"

"I AM NOT A SPY!" I marched up to him, huffing angrily in his face.

Why didn't he understand? I wasn't one of them; if I had been then I would be dead by now! I thought we had it all settled yesterday, but apparently I was wrong.

"Prove it to me that I am a spy Kakashi! Since you aren't convinced of what I told you yesterday!"

All too suddenly I found myself pressed against the wall with a kunai brushing my throat and the gaze he gave me could have killed billions. Angry by his behaviour and fed up of keeping all this anger bottled up in me, I just spilled it out everything.

"Okay, Kakashi, go ahead, slit my throat, I don't care anymore! Better get killed than standing in front of a person who cannot recognize me as an ally!"

My words did affect Kakashi, but he remained firm and cold as usual and didn't budge his kunai from my throat. We stood there glaring at each other and my heart was pounding with such dread against my ribs, I thought it would break out of my chest soon. I could see a smirk form underneath his mask and skilfully he pulled his kunai away and put it back into his kunai pouch. However he remained in this position, close to my face and as I felt very uneasy at his closeness he noticed it and suddenly leaned his head forward next to my ears.

"If threatening you with kunai doesn't work, I have no choice but to use drastic measures." He breathed in a threatening tone, which made my heart jump to my throat in fear.

Suddenly he began to breathe along my neck, causing me to gasp fearfully and shrink away from him, but in vain he held me firmly against the wall. I pulled my head away with a whimper.

"Stop it Kakashi! Let me go! Kakashi!"

He did not reply, but exacerbated the whole situation by pressing his whole body against mine. I could feel his thundering heart beats against my chest and his hot body radiating through mine, bringing back parts of the flashback from the robber. With wide stricken eyes, I could hear his snigger and see his smug like smirk. I dug my nails in Kakashi's shoulders, trembling and whimpering against him. I was on the verge of loosing my sanity, then his hands began to explore my body and I screamed with all my might. All of a sudden to silence me down, he pressed energetically his lips against mine. It felt like the whole world crumbled away and I was falling in the dark bottomless abyss. I froze, unable to scream or move. His lips scorching mine in a fierce kiss, which burned my insides with revulsion and dread. Is it going to end like this? Is he really that type of person? The tears wouldn't come, no matter how much my eyes burned, I felt hollow inside and horribly betrayed. Kakashi pulled away to look at me, my horrified and dreaded gaze sunken to the ground and lost.

"Now I understand who you really are." I spoke, shocked of how my voice sounded so hollow and cold.

"I regarded you as a close friend, I trusted you whole heartedly and you took advantage of my trauma to squeeze out every penny of information. That is so low and so foul of you. Even if you hadn't used all of this, if you only came to ask for the truth, I would answer with the truth. But now you lost your chance and lost my trust."

Promptly I looked at him in the face with the coldest glare I ever had given to anybody in this world. Kakashi seemed to be out of breath and his eyes were clouded with something that I couldn't identify, but he showed he was startled of my glare.

"You did well Kakashi, you played your role very well. I fell for it and I really thought you were a good person, how naïve of me. I've heard so much good stuff about you and I truthfully admired you deeply."

As Kakashi heard this he was coming back to himself, the truth was smothering him more and more until I could tell he was shocked of what he did. The ball of anger in my stomach erupted like a volcano.

"What could I expect? A shinobi nation, welcoming a total stranger with open arms, how ridiculous! I should've stayed home with my family who at least are human enough to trust and accept me for who I am! Dammit! I came here to become stronger to protect myself from what YOU JUST DID TO ME! Is that a sin?! Kakashi tell me is that a sin?!"

It kept on coming; I was like the lava sweeping down the mountain burning everything in its path.

"No wonder you have no close friends! Because they are afraid you might back stab them! No wonder you've got nobody that loves you, because you don't give them the chance to get close to you or even let them understand you and why is that?! It's because…"

"YOU'RE A MAN WITHOUT FEELINGS WHO DOESN'T TRUST ANYBODY EXCEPT FOR HIMSELF! YOU ARE THE MOST MISERABLE, PITIFUL, SELF-CENTERED BASTARD I EVER MET! CONTINUE LIKE THIS AND I CAN ASSURE YOU THE WHOLE VILLAGE WILL BE AGAINST YOU IN NO TIME!"

I gave anger filled shuddering breaths to calm myself down and Kakashi only stared at me unable to say a word. It angered me so much his impassiveness that I slapped him across the face.

"You are the worst, I hate you Kakashi! Fine then rot in your own damn apartment, I won't let you take advantage of me again! At least I'm grateful that you taught me to trust NOBODY! THANK YOU FOR TEACHING ME TO BE COLD AS WELL!"

Before storming out of the apartment, I gave a deep sigh and glanced the last time to Kakashi.

"I was ready to be your friend, ready to listen to your troubles and to support you, but you not only disappointed me but hurt my feelings deeply. I liked you a lot. I wanted to give up anything in the world to be beside you."

Kakashi looked at me with disbelief at my statement and only seconds later I realized what I said, so I ran out of the living room and out of the apartment entirely.

Making the whole situation worse, the sky had turned grey and the rain dropped like ice, drenching me as I hopped and sprinted from roof to another. This place was cursed! Everything was jinxed, every time I was angry the sky was dark, lighting and pouring down raining! What the hell is wrong? It's like the weather was influenced by the human's emotions that is so abnormal! Useless to curse everything around me, I was trapped in an Anime for God's sake! Everything is fictional! As the sky darkened and as the street lamps lit, the people withdrew in their houses enjoying the warmth of their family or their lovers. In there everything seemed perfect and well protected, whereas I, I was drenched, miserable, angry and depressed and running away from that cold hearted jerk! A guy whom I fell in love with without reason. What drew me to love him anyway? Was it his seriousness? His natural behaviour? Or his lazy doggish appearance? Or was it his physical appearance? If it was the last option than I might as well throw myself off a cliff! Memo to myself, behind good looks is a shit character! Then something grabbed my attention and I landed on the roof and observed it. My blond hair draping down in locks, covering part of my face and with a serious gaze. Several roofs away, I found a figure training on the roof with such intensity that he didn't take the slightest notice of the rain. It seemed to have noticed my presence and it turned around to me, a thin scar stretched across the spin of his nose. His black orbs staring at me piercingly with his brows arched down and his tied up chocolate hair drenched and flattened by the rain. It was the first time I ever witnessed him training so fiercely. Having nothing to do and no intentions of going back to that jerk, I just continued staring at him. Iruka turned his drenched form towards me, trying to identify the stranger staring at him under the pouring rain. Then as I drove a hand through my hair, he caught a good glimpse of me and suddenly vanished in a puff of smoke. Seconds later he reappeared in front of me with a smile.

"Good evening Hanshin san, what brings you here in this dreary evening?" he greeted me politely and with a radiating smile, which seemed to be the only thing that emitted such warmth.

Unable to contain all this misery and anger, I just ran into his arms and began crying in his chest. He was too startled to react the slightest, I know it was for him awkward that a girl would run into his arms like this, but I needed somebody to lean on, somebody which I felt comfortable expressing my misery. Underneath my heavy and uncontrollable sobs, I managed to plea to him.

"Can I…stay at…your place…for tonight?"

I took some time for Iruka to respond and finally he wrapped his arms around me and replied in a gentle and comforting voice.

"Of course you can."

He pulled away and with his gentle hands, he wiped some of my tears away and smiled affectionately. He guided me to the roof he trained on with his hand holding mine firmly. He led me to the escape stairs and descended down to the thin hallway lined with old shabby doors leading to apartments. A shinobi's life was a true misery, living in a flat with 1 ½ or 2 rooms is depressing but affordable for a shinobi's salary. With his large, rough yet gentle hands he led me into his apartment and let go of my hand to run into the bathroom. He appeared with two fluffy towels, he draped one over my shoulders and the other over his.

"Sorry if the room seems a bit messy." He apologized

I just waved off his apology and gave a watery smile.

"At least a shelter." I mumbled and sunk my miserable gaze to the ground before more heavy tears cascaded down my face.

I trembled uncontrollably once more. I didn't want to leave him, I did not want to hate him, but it was difficult to think like this. Kakashi drove me to the pit of imaginable misery, taking advantage of my weakness and forcing me to submit to the worst torture. And why was that? Only because he's was suspecting my allegiance? I've repeatedly told him, I wasn't a spy and I stated all possible evidence that contradict a spy's intentions. Why is he so stubborn and cold to understand this? What should I do? Should I jump off a cliff to show him that I'm not a spy? Quite suddenly Iruka hugged me tightly and comforted me with his voice and caressing my head.

"Calm down Sara, its okay, I'm here. I give you my shoulder."

I could tell he was very concerned and it touched me deeply. At least one person had no difficulty with expressing himself. I let out all my agony on his shoulder, held him firmly and clutched his shirt with frustration that my hands shook. I was grateful that I had a friend who supported me, but deep within my heart I was hoping it could be Kakashi. Holding me, whispering to me comforting words and I felt ashamed that I thought like this. It wasn't Kakashi, it was Iruka! Get a grip of yourself, Kakashi doesn't care about you, you are - like he always says – a mere tool to his mission. Why couldn't it be more? Why can I not love him?

The next morning I woke up, in a foreign bed. A tiny crammed room, which in most part was made of wood. No wonder all shinobi's left their flat over the day, it's so damn depressing. I pulled the covers down and noticed I was only wearing an oversized Jounin outfit. It stabbed me in the heart because it reminded me so badly about Kakashi. Then all the emotions and my memory came back, filling me up with frustration once more and the desire to cry, but my eyes were too sore and maybe even swollen to spill tears. Then I heard the sound of a lock being unlocked and on my left stepped out an Iruka with a naked torso out of the bathroom, with his chocolate brown hair dangling its full length down his shoulder and with towel leisurely thrown around his neck. He spotted me staring at him agape and greeted me with a cheerful grin.

"Good morning. Did you sleep well?"

Dumbly I nodded at him, scanning his appearance with astonishment. He seemed to notice why I was like this and right away apologized.

"I'm so sorry to startle you with this appearance."

Quickly he put his shirt on, somewhat feeling embarrassed of his inappropriate appearance.

"No-no! You didn't, I'm used to it…"

Realizing what I just said, quickly I diverted my gaze to hide the colour rising in my cheeks. Kakashi's naked torso taunted my memory. I was sure Iruka noticed my nervous behaviour and then he cleared his throat.

"Anyway, I was wondering…Where you got those strangling marks from?" he questioned me with concern.

I spun my head to him, covering my neck with anxiety. Flashes of Kakashi's doings passed through my eyes, like an ice cold shower. Gosh! Why can I not conceal the tinniest thing?

"I assume that you received that in a fight, since you were crying and whimpering in your sleep."

An icy silence roamed over us, it's impossible to lie since he heard me crying in my sleep and how the hell can I explain about the strangling marks?

"…" I didn't give a reply and he took that as a "yes".

"Isn't it from your partner?"

I looked at him, slightly confused of his meaning, but I remember the time we met at the bar that I mentioned Kakashi as my so-called partner for my mission. Softly I nodded without looking at him. Noticing the anxious tension in the atmosphere and Iruka's sharp breath intake I could tell he was furious.

"Who is it?" he insisted

I looked at him, highly alarmed.

"Such cruelty must be reported to the Hokage!"

I briskly jumped out of bed and stood in front of him.

"NO!"

Noticing that I shouted at him, I quickly calmed myself down and told him with a calmer but pleading tone.

"It's my fault that he got mad! It's sincerely my fault! I deserved it! Please, don't report it!"

Iruka was astonished of my defensive behaviour, but was unwilling to believe any of this and showed that he was appalled.

"Amazing that you still can defend him, after he nearly strangled you to death?! Why defend such a brute? It's not like you love him?"

His last sentence took away my breath and the colour came back to my cheeks and I avoided his gaze. Iruka stared at me, unable to believe that it was true.

"Can I take a shower?" I asked, clearly digressing from the whole subject and since he didn't show any sign of disapproval I just left him standing there.

The rest of day, we didn't talk about this topic, since Iruka was sensitive enough to know that it was a painful topic. However despite the awkwardness we had a nice chat and a nice time together.


	15. Chapter 14

**Hiya again!! Sorry been busy writting a story, I'm working on two actually and God -frown-** **I hope I will manage!! I am a person bursting with billions of ideas for all sorts of stories and believe me it's difficult to keep a straight head and prevent myself from beginning other stories -huff-. Anyway here's a new Chapter, hope you enjoy and I thank all the readers for the review****s. **

**By the way I had to laugh when one of you mentioned Kakashi was getting annoying and believe me when i wrote these parts i felt like strangling him, you know i put so much effort into this and made Kakashi pretty much real and i can't get away from him that easily-sigh- **(_I seriously can't! Even my room is covered with Kakashi posters! I even drew a picture of him! I confess I am a Kakashi addict, it would take me several years at the detox thingy to get him out of my life, really!)_** Anyway I am happy that all of you could percieve** **this that Kakashi isn't perfect no matter how HOT or sexy he is -blushes wildly and releases steam- !! **

**Okay, I know Sara and Kakashi are on bad terms and their constant bickering is getting on your nerves, but hey it would be no fun if they followed the motto of _"_**_kiss, make-out and go for it_**_"_. I wanted to keep it realistic as possible, I mean relationships take time, it's not like right after you kiss your boyfriend that you were dating for a couple of days you jump to bed with him right away **(_okay, I'm not to judge here, if you do that, whatever, but its my opinion...well if it would be Kakashi I don't know... -grins-.)_** Okay now I am really getting off the subject and sorry that my -Can't-get-kakashi-out-of-my-head- attack strikes at the wrong moment. Anyway thanks a bunch for all your reviews and enjoy as much as you can this story. Also bear with me, there is still a long way to go. **

* * *

**CHAPTER FOURTEEN**

- Did the truth reveal itself? -

I stayed for one week at Iruka's tiny apartment. It was one of the most carefree and wonderful week I ever had in Konoha! I got over some of my trouble with Kakashi, but Iruka attempted and failed at each go to find out the criminal who did the strangling marks. For his and Kakashi's sake, I didn't want it to become a brawl, but for once I was rarely thinking about Kakashi and it did well to my nerves. However there was a brief moment everyday for the passed 7 days, where my heart skipped a beat. I caught Iruka's eyes lingering on me and some of them times he smiled secretly. I was beginning to fear something, but I preferred ignoring this than to get my mind all worked up. Then on the final day, Iruka came back from work, slightly out of breath and he greeted me with a smile.

"Let's go out tonight."

"Yea, why not!" I replied with excitement.

Briefly some concern flashed in his face and his brows furrowed. Reading his expression, I gave an answer to what he intended to say with an optimistic attitude and patted his shoulder.

"Don't worry! Let's just focus on having a nice evening, okay?"

It took a moment for Iruka to lighten up and he finally nodded with a smile. He was very cute when he was so caring and embarrassed, but truthfully my eyes weren't on him. I only volunteered to go out, because I felt bad because he was pampering and taking care of me the whole week. Also I needed some fresh air from this dusty and depressing apartment. As the night fell, we got ready and left his apartment and walked along the crowded and romantic street of Konoha. Many couples walked around, going into shops or restaurants and chatting and laughing with each other. I just watched them with a hint of remorse. Then Iruka's hand gripped caught my hand and intertwined with mine. Somewhat uncomfortable and startled, I glanced up at him, but his grave gaze remained firmly in front of him. My heart raced against my ribs, why was I feeling like this? Why towards him? Afraid to hurt his feelings I didn't pull my hand away and just kept on walking beside him in silence. What were the people thinking about us? Feeling self-conscious I didn't take notice of the people looking, but I was afraid that Kakashi would spot us holding hands. However all too suddenly he dragged me into a dark alley, next to a restaurant. He pulled me into the far shadow of the corner. Pulling me so that I stood in front of him, he looked at me with such intensity.

"Sara…" he began, breathing quickly and behaving a bit nervous and insecure about what he was going to say.

"I love you."

My heart made a summersault and my eyes widened; it was what I had feared.

"Forget him! I wouldn't dare hurt you and I wouldn't make you cry, please accept me!"

I was too speechless to reply. It was the first time in my life a person confessed to me in such an ardently way, though shamefully deep down I wished it wasn't him. Slowly his face approached mine, I was too rapt by my own reaction that only when he kissed me I came back to my senses. With wide stricken eyes, Iruka's facial expression was mixed with longing and urgency, but he had amazingly strong self-control over his feelings. He seemed to suppress his strong desires fearing to scare me and I was touched by it, but I didn't want his lips to kiss mine. Then for a split second, Kakashi's cheerful face flashed in front of me and with it strong emotions surged into my system reviving the scenes where he nearly kissed me, where he fell on top of me and the look he gave me, where he brutally kissed me to retrieve some information. I wanted him! I was craving for him! Abruptly I shoved Iruka away from me, he was startled and his eyes were clouded with desire. I shook my head, tears trickling down my cheeks and looking at him.

"I cannot accept your feelings, not when I love him so much!" I confessed miserably that I broke into a run, leaving him standing in the shadow of the alley.

Unable to cope with what just happened, I just sprinted through the streets knocking over people as I go, who cursed me and with one bounce I landed on the roof. I crossed the roofs still sobbing, until I reached the forest near to the training ground and not too far away from the lake.

I ran to the lake and sunk to my knees at the shore. I have no friends anymore again I'm alone, abandoned. Why does it happen to me? I bellowed with all my might, causing the birds nestled on the trees to flutter away and cawing panic-stricken in the darkness of the sky. It helped me to calm down, but it was difficult to contain my silent sobs and hiccoughs.

"I never heard such an agonizing cry." Called a voice behind me and startled I jumped back into the water, backing into the depths.

"After enjoying Iruka's company, you won't accept his feelings? I think you ruined a perfect chance in becoming happy."

The outline became clearer as it stepped out of the shadow of the forest revealing its silvery hair and covered face and his all too familiar lazy allure. My heart skipped a beat and I diverted my gaze to the side, unable to look at him in the face.

"Y-y-you saw us?" I stammered.

"Yup."

"Heard us?"

"Yup."

This made everything far worse, how could I get out of this without revealing my feelings for him?

"So who's the lucky one?"

"Huh?"

"You quoted "I cannot accept your feelings, not when I love him so much" and who is he? Iruka is crossed out of the list, right?"

I couldn't believe what I heard, is he really that oblivious?! If I had been him, I would have discovered it a century ago! Right away alarmed by his nearing presence, I dove into the water to cool down my heart beat and boiling face. The water sent a shrill down my system, it was damn cold! Though it felt good against my face and swollen eyes and it did in fact calm my system. I had to risk my sanity to stay away from Kakashi, before I loose my nerves. I swam deeper and further away from him, but kept on feeling like I was a gold fish trapped in a bowl. I bet that jerk was enjoying it and it annoyed me! As the need of oxygen grew desperately and I was too exhausted, I had no choice but to swim up to the surface. As I broke to the surface, I took a gasp for air and shrieked as I met Kakashi's ridiculously cheerful face. He was kneeling at shore and looking down on me and chuckled with that idiotic laugh of his.

"Ha! I know you're tactics too well. Don't forget I am your teacher." He bragged

"Piss off!" I hissed

He gave me that bored look and sighed.

"Still holding a grudge against me? How depressing." He shook his head and suddenly a wrinkle formed underneath his mask, it was a mischievous smirk.

I was too slow to react - he grabbed my forearms and pulled me to shore like a big carp. I slammed my fists against his chest to let me go, but he was easily resisting them, since they were like hits of an angry kid.

"I don't remember teaching you to hit your teacher."

"Get your perverted paws off of me, you bastard!"

"I didn't teach you to bad mouth me either."

"And?! Got a problem with that! I won't let you take advantage of me again, even if you've got to rape me!" I snapped at him viciously and he rolled his eye with a hopeless sigh.

"Why are women so stubborn and slow?" he mumbled and suddenly caught my arms flipped me over to the ground, I continued slamming my fists against his chest with such frustration that I was unaware of his next action.

He pulled his mask down with such speed and captured my lips with his. The slamming of my fists against his chest slowed down and weakened the longer his lips rested against mine. I couldn't believe it; I stared wide eyed to the dark skies, believing it was a dream. However the feel of his lips, his warmth pinched my senses, squealing with glee. Butterflies fluttered in the pit of my stomach and the warmth spread out in my system, like somebody poured some warm water over my body. The feeling was pleasing and imaginably exciting. Succumbing to his kiss, my eyes met his, they were partially closed. There was this glint in his eyes; this longing that I am sure was in my eyes as well. Enjoying it, I closed my eyes and answered his kiss hesitantly and than with more confidence. Kakashi seemed to be surprised, because he briefly paused and started anew. By itself my arms wrapped around his neck and that is where he stopped, although I continued following my feelings blindly and kissing him.

"Sa...ra…Wha…are…yu…doin…" he spoke in-between my kisses sounding astonished.

Confused of his question, I stopped dead in my actions and opened my eyes. I found him staring at me with that look as if I was caught doing something really bad or embarrassing. Taking a couple of seconds to realize what just happen, with a scorching red face, I briskly withdrew my arms and looked away. Damn! I wish the ground could engulf me NOW!! Kakashi clicked his tongue and shook his head.

"You surely became disrespectful and undisciplined towards your teacher. You even bad mouth me, hit me and then kiss me. What's next, are going to sleep with me?"

"Shut up!" I snapped feverishly underneath my hands, which covered my red face.

He was making everything worse for me, humiliating me by every means and I bet it was some sort of act of revenge. I bet he was bathing in glory now, enjoying the triumph over my humiliation.

"Let me tell you this, we stepped into a forbidden realm. More precisely we violated several codes regarding the teacher-student relationship and normally I would've lost my job and you would've been kicked out of Konoha." He breathed in my left ear and I became straight away rigid.

For crying out loud! Doesn't he have any idea, how dangerous this is for my heart?! I was quite annoyed of his flirtatious behaviour that I suddenly turned my head to face him. His closeness once again, made me nervous and with a deep breath, I snapped at him.

"For your information, you started it!"

-And you continued it!" he spoke with confidence and approached my face, hovering only millimetres away from my face.

Feeling uneasy of his closeness I sunk deeper into the ground, only to be away from him. A peculiar smirk formed over his face.

"Admit it that you liked it." He coaxed

If my head and heart could explode from over heat, it probably did already!

"I…

-Don't deny it, Sara. Then why did you close your eyes and kiss me back with such passion?"

I groaned at his annoying think-he's-the-best attitude and retorted with hostility.

"Then why did you start with it then? And why didn't pull away after a moment? You were the one enjoying it!"

I seemed to have caught Kakashi red handed, but he quickly recapitulated with his usual arrogant attitude.

"It was the only way to shut you up." He stated flatly with a cheery tone and chuckled in his ridiculous way.

I turned my head to the side with a sweat drop, frowning with humiliation. That jerk, double crossed brainless, playboy and mischievous bastard! I spilled the beans, because he kissed meeeeeeeee!! WAAAAAAAAHHHHH!! I'M GONNA KILLLLLLLL HIMMMM!! My legs twitched with irritation so that I pulled them up and kicked him hard in the chest, catapulting him like a big sack of potatoes into the lake, where he plunged in. He came up, spitting water like a sprinkler to the side and he exclaimed.

"Hey! You didn't have to go too far as to kicking me into the water! That hurt!"

I got up and resting a hand on either side of my hips and laughing triumphantly down on him.

"That my friend is a woman's wrath."

"Where, where? I don't see any woman." He eagerly glanced around.

I raised my trembling, clenched fist. Anger bubbled inside of me, Kakashi has gone too far now.

"Again, discriminating my gender. I'll make sure you suffer the consequences…KAKASHIIIIII!" I cracked my knuckles and with a roar I jumped into the lake and chased after him like a hungry predator.

It was a relief to me; Kakashi didn't notice my feelings, since I was chasing him like a mad woman back and forth through the lake. He was panicking like a chicken running away from the mad butcher! HA! That's what you call a "woman's wrath".

The next day I felt so bad. Obviously I got a bad cold and was stuck in bed for good. I had a high fever. To my great pleasure Kakashi was bringing me the daily meals and I could tell as he sighed with irritation and gave his lazy look that he really hated that. It made me more and more grin at myself to see him being my maid. I could reach him with a single loud call and it was fun to see him obey like a dog. Then as he served me the last meal for the evening, he sat in front of the desk, deeply reading his perverted orange book. Suddenly he sneezed.

"Damn! It's your fault that I have a cold now!" he accused me, as he wiped his nose.

"If you had given up early, none of us would be having a cold." I stated in as-a-matter-of-fact tone, enjoying the nice ramen as I slurped.

"If you hadn't been chasing me, you wouldn't be lying in bed with a high fever and I wouldn't have to serve you 24 hours and get your cold!"

He really hated getting sick, but I just ignored his remark by setting my tray aside and looking out of the window.

"Does it ever snow here?"

"No."

"Really I thought you had all four seasons?"

"Nope, we've got only spring and summer."

"That's annoying."

"Why?" He finally raised his head from his book to look at me, but I still kept my gaze locked to the starry sky.

"At home I have all four seasons, now its summer as well, but frankly speaking I hate summer."

"Why is that?" asked Kakashi, who seemed to be more engaged by my conversation all too suddenly.

"You know sitting in the warmth, wrapped up in thick blankets and holding a cup of hot coco and staring at the snow flakes falling from the sky or sitting all cuddled up in front of a fire in the chimney." I marvelled with my eyes shut and smiling to myself, easily picturing every single bit of it.

"How boring." Supplied Kakashi in a lazy tone and the bed shifted as I felt him sitting behind me. I opened my eyes and turned around to find him lying across on his sides, holding that book in his hand and reading out of it.

"You aren't romantic, you know."

"Yea, I know and I'm not bothered by it."

I crossed my arms over my chest, sighing hopelessly at Kakashi. What a bother! Curiosity struck me and I lay my eyes on him, observing as his only black eye scanned the lines in his book.

"What are you staring at?"

"N-n-nothing." I stammered with a nervous voice.

Shit, I must be more careful. Then with one hand movement he snapped his book shut and briskly gave me a piercing gaze. My heart made a summersault and I looked away.

"You know I noticed lately, you get really nervous around my presence, why is that?"

Did he have to ask such embarrassing questions? Why in the hell did he have to torment me? It was like asking, why is the grass green? Sunken in my own thoughts only later I noticed his approaching face. Then he grabbed a hold of my chin and raised it, to examine my face.

"You know with that blue eyes and blond hair of yours, anybody could mistake you for a shinobi from Yukigakure."

"True, it's a snow country. The people stay inside most of the time, because of the temperature."

Briefly Kakashi gave me a suspicious eye, but concluded not to interrogate me further.

"For a foreigner you sure pretend not to know anything."

"What? It's a fact, in my place the northern countries are snow countries that is why they have light skin, blue eyes and blond hair."

"What about you?"

"Well, everybody gets my nationality mixed with those northern countries, but I'm a combination of nationalities."

Alarmed about the topic that was leading to my true identity and whereabouts, I quickly ruffled Kakashi's hair with a grin.

"I bet with that hair of yours it would be easy to blend in Yukigakure."

"Of course, however I'll be chased out of that country if I set a single foot in it."

"Really, why is that?" I asked with curiosity, although I did know the reasons and not asking him would be suspicious, right?

I watched the first movie of Naruto and I'm so proud of myself that I did! Kakashi was so cuuuute!! He was small maybe my age or older, he looked so hot in his Anbu outfit.

"No reasons really." He answered simply and it didn't bother me that he was brief. Though my curiosity pricked me, I couldn't resist but to say something to him.

"It was a mission, right?"

"Yep."

Feeling a bit tiered; I lay down across and watched him reading that book. There was a question burning me and I wanted to know the answer.

"Kakashi."

"Hmm" His attention was focused on me.

"Is it worthwhile, all those missions?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean is it meaningful to you, all those killing."

Kakashi gave a chuckle.

"You know you sound like a kid."

"Is it?" I insisted in a serious tone, ignoring his previous statement.

He noticed my seriousness and he sighed then replied calmly.

"Not always, but it's not like I have a choice. I do that as a living, all shinobis do that."

"Don't you regret it?"

Kakashi looked at me, astonished of my question; as if nobody ever asked him that sort of question before and he gave a thought about it.

"Maybe I do, maybe I don't. It depends on the situations. But I've been born and raised into a shinobi nation, I've been trained to become emotionless and it's my duty to protect my country as long as I live - regret or generally feelings are foreign to most of us."

I gave a chuckle and Kakashi looked at me confused.

"What's so funny?"

"It's impossible not to feel anything. We aren't machines, we were created to feel and no matter how much those suppress it the more they are miserable." My eye lids felt heavy, they closed and I yawned.

"Truthfully when I killed those robbers, although it was out of self defence, I felt traumatized, repulsed at myself. First time I killed somebody…I did not expect it to be so traumatising."

"Living with their blood on my hands, disgusts and frightens me. I hope to hide this from my family; otherwise I'll be kicked out of the family."

Then I felt his finger rest against my lips and I opened my tiered eyes to look at him. He gave a sympathizing look.

"You worry too much."

"Yea I do, because I don't want to be rejected."

I looked at him straight in the eyes and sat up, however drowsiness attacked me and I lost my balance and fell forward. Due to the fever I couldn't fully realize what happened only that I fell on top of Kakashi and that his knees were on either of my sides. Too exhausted to move a muscle, I apologized weakly.

"I'm sorry."

"Hey, Sara, don't you dare fall asleep on me!"

"Hey!"

"Hey!"

His calling remained unanswered as I drifted to a deep sleep and was already in the realms of dream.

We ran in a field of floors hand in hand, running and laughing. Than we took a break and let ourselves fall into the soft grass. I stared at the blue sky filled with white fluffy clouds. Kakashi titled his head over to me and his head than blocked my sight to the blue sky. Only looking at him, he than climbed on me on his fours and we stared into each other's eyes. It seemed time stopped as we stared at each other, exploring the depths of our eyes. My heart was beating so fast and I felt his affectionate eyes emit indescribable warmth that it flooded my entire system. Then his face began to approach mine slowly and our lips met. It was like kissing a cloud and tasting the delicious sweetness of a fruit. My hands intertwined in his silver hair, getting to feel its softness. He kissed me so tenderly that I couldn't let go of him….

Briskly I snapped my eyes open to meet Kakashi's lazy grinning face. I noticed I was flushed and sweaty so I brusquely turned away. Again mischief was in his eyes which warned me of some merciless teasing. His face drew nearer to mine and he whispered.

"I heard you moaning for my name…Don't tell me you were dreaming something inappropriate about me?"

I chocked on myself, blushing profusely and jumped out of bed to retort at him sheepishly.

"I certainly AM NOT! I wasn't moaning, maybe muttering! What the hell are you talking about?! You are the one with the perverted thoughts!"

"Was I good at it?"

"Huh?"

Kakashi approach me, lowering his head to my eye level, this all too familiar glint in his eyes. I was backing away from him, heart beating fast and feeling awfully nervous.

"Was I good in making love to you?"

I groaned with frustration, that guy was the worst! His head seems to be filled only with that stuff! And what made everything worse was, when he was backing me against the desk. Then he rested a hand on either side of me, to trap me and his face came closer to mine. His breath was scorching my face, sending a shrill to my heart.

"Shall we check out for ourselves? If I'm compatible enough for you?" he spoke with such skill, as if he was a professional in that domain.

His words provoked smutty thoughts in my mind so that I was boiling like a steaming kettle. It disgusted me greatly the way he spoke and especially how casual he sounded. I pushed him distancing him from me.

"Over my dead body, you paedophile!" I spat at him and grabbed my clothes and stormed to the bathroom and slammed the door shut.

I cursed underneath my breath and leaned against the door and buried my face in my hands, letting a frustrated groan. This guy was really disgusting! Why does he have to toy around with me like this, is it fun for him to torment me like this, only because I'm a girl? I slid down the door, sitting on the cool ceramic floors and pulling my legs up and embracing them. Then I felt a soft knock on the door and I just ignored it, knowing anyway who it was.

"Hey, Sara, I was just joking, okay?"

"…"

"Oh come on, Sara! I was only teasing."

"…" Still I did not respond.

It's disrespectful to toy around with me. I cannot take all of this as a joke. It's something serious! It's regarding my own feelings towards him. As stupid as he may be, he did not find out my feelings and it's a relief, however I hate it when he gets so close to me, to the point that my feelings will just spill out of me. Frustrated by the whole thing, I heaved another groan than jumped to my feet and wrenched the door open. Finding him with his hand leaning against the door way and staring at me perplexed. I raised my finger threateningly and gave him a scowl.

"Stop taking advantage of me, only because I'm a girl!"

"Whoa, calm down. I was only teasing you."

I groaned through gritted teeth.

"That isn't the point! How am I supposed to react after a 26 year old guy who is actually my teacher, stole my FIRST KISS?!" I slammed the door in front of his face and locked it.

I leaned against the door, covering my reddening face and stripped myself from my pyjamas and slipped into the shower. What the hell was that all about?! He thinks he can get me that easily, than he's so wrong! Sweet talking and flirting to me is the worst thing he can do and if he does that again. He'll find himself with billions of kunais run through him like a freaking voodoo doll! Nevertheless my finger brushed over my lips, even it was before yesterday I still could feel the pressure of his lips against mine. Why was that? How could my body so easily register this? Why a playboy like him, could so easily affect me like this? However deep down and I was ashamed to admit it - but I liked the fact that he teased me. It proved to me that he was acknowledging my existence and even showing to me that he liked me. Anyway I could say I wasn't any better than him; I was taking advantage of his flirtatious behaviour to feed my feelings. And the problem was my feelings grew more and more and that would explain the dream and my growing nervousness in his presence. In all silence and pleasure I continued my shower with a secretive smile.

Feeling refreshed and reborn, I came out of the bathroom with my blond hair still damp. I dropped my stuff in my bedroom and with the towel draped around my neck, I walked to the kitchen. As I encountered Kakashi and as he spotted me, I made a turn and marched away from him. His hand caught my wrist, stopping me and I turn around, showing my annoyed face. He looked a bit flushed for some reasons and there were some dark rings beneath his eyes, he looked unwell. My attention intensified that my scowl vanished. He then looked aside, scratching the back of his head, clearly showing his uneasiness.

"I'm sorry for ever doubting you. I was too thick headed to understand your innocence. I didn't mean to strangle nor mol-

I stopped him with my finger on his clothed lips.

Perplexed he eyed my finger than looked at me, than I pulled my finger away.

"I rather not talk about it, it's in the past." I told him calmly with a smile.

It was obvious that he wanted to discuss about it, but he abruptly dropped to his knees. Alarmed and concerned about this, I quickly draped his arm around my shoulder and helped him up. His knees felt wobbly and he kept his head lowered, his face was red and sweating. I placed my hand on his forehead and withdrew it promptly, while exclaiming with concern.

"Gosh! You got a fever!"

He chuckled weakly.

"I suppose I got that when you slept on top of me."

The red rose in my cheeks and I looked away. Why the hell do I do such embarrassing things? This cursed place! Since Kakashi wasn't teasing me about this matter it only meant that he really wasn't well and so I brought him to the living room. I placed him on the sofa and he plumped back with a sigh.

"Maybe take off your Jounin west." I suggested and he complied without a word.

I expected him to come up with his stupid remark, but he was actually too sick to think properly. Poor guy! I got up and went to my room, to grab some blankets and covered his shaking form and while I tucked him in, he observed me.

"You do that often?"

I looked at him with confusion.

"What?"

"I mean, you know, taking care of the sick."

I responded to his statement with a grin.

"I come from a big family of nine people and I am used to tuck in my younger siblings..."

I realized my answer was really brief, but it indicated to Kakashi that I wasn't so keen on talking about them.

"Aha." He replied quietly.

I went to him to remove his head gear, but he already began untying the knot and gave me the head gear. I held it in my head, feeling the warmth of the dark material and the coolness of the metal plate with the Konoha emblem.

"It's so cool." I muttered and placed it on the table nearby.

Kakashi just watched me quietly, with his calculating eyes. Afterwards my hand pinched the mask that covered the rest of his face and gently pulled it down, but he caught my hand suddenly like a reflex action. Startled of that action I looked at him; his dark eyes looked at me with its usual piercing way.

"Leave it."

"It won't kill you, you are at home anyway and I saw your face already twice."

His grip did not relax and I noticed he still wore his hand guard. I chuckled.

"Relax! I'm not going to kill you in your sleep."

"That's what I am afraid of."

I rolled my eyes and snorted with ridicule. This guy was too vigilant and I bet that he can't even be at rest when a maid's doing the housework. I placed my hand over his hand that gripped mine and I looked at him with a reassuring smile. He encountered my smile with his usual lazy look, except that it was weaker.

"Let me take care of everything, Kakashi, just relax, you need it seriously."

It was funny to see Kakashi only stare at me without saying a word, but finally he relaxed his grip and I could take off his hand guard and pull his mask down. Then I got up and went to the kitchen and brought back with me a bowl filled with water and a cloth. Again fully alert he watched me; I dipped the cloth in the water and squeezed it. With the cloth in my hand, I placed in on his forehead.

"Can you close your eyes?"

He looked at me as if I asked him something strange.

"I'll just wipe your face, not more!"

"How can I be sure of that?"

I pinched a strand of his silver hair and yanked it a bit.

"Even when you are sick you still are so annoying. I thought you would be very docile."

Before he could comment on that, quickly I wipe his mouth region. Again with a stronger tone, I reassured him that I wasn't doing more.

"Can you not shut your eyes for a moment? Geez!"

Finally after staring at me, he closed his eyes and I began gently wiping his flushed and sweaty face. With my flat hand I brushed the cloth from his forehead, down his nose, his cheeks than his lips. The contact with his skin, although it was indirect as the cloth was separating my finger tips from his skin, it caused some exciting sparks. Trying to repress my feelings, I dumped the cloth back into the bowl and squeezed it. Then I turned back and saw Kakashi still had his eyes shut, his facial muscles were relaxed now. I decided to wipe around his chin, then descended down his neck and he heaved a sigh. His lips smiled.

"I should do that more often, it's so relaxing."

"Told ya."

Deeply focused on my chore, I felt Kakashi observing me once again.

"Wha, so serious."

I gave a pleased chuckle, but kept my eyes on the cloth. A thought came to my spirit and it made me a bit sad. I just realized in what miserable state Kakashi was. Actually when he's sick, does he receive such tending? Or does he do it by himself?

"What's wrong?" he asked me, interrupting me in my thoughts and I look at him.

"You look troubled."

"Oh, really? Sorry." I added and grinned at him.

"It's just… Don't you get lonely in this apartment?"

"Maybe."

Unable to digest that answer, I kept on wiping his face and throat, to focus on something else. This answer did not suffice me, but to get all depressed about it cannot solve the situation, can't it? Instinctively Kakashi grabbed my hand, to catch my attention.

"Funny. You get all down because of that?" he said, slightly amused.

I looked at him and eyed his hand gripping mine. Why was he holding my hand like this or even looking at me like this? A thought struck me, like an ice cold shower, fear scattered within my system and I felt ashamed of myself. He wasn't real, none of this was real, even my feelings weren't real. I'm only in love with an anime character, nothing substantial, although I'm living in it. Wouldn't it be wiser to suppress those feelings when I return to my own world? The more I let those feelings develop the more difficult it will be for me to part from him.

"You can be such a nuisance sometimes, but I can read in your face that you are troubled."

I was brought back to my awareness. I glanced at my hand covered by his and withdrew it quickly.

"No, I just remembered something."

Clearly not convinced by my briefness and avoiding gaze, I quickly continued the conversation by sitting with my back against the sofa without looking at him.

"Back to my question, what I meant is don't you feel you are leading a lonely life? I mean I cannot stand solitude…

- Isn't it why you attempted suicide." He cut me across and it stabbed me in the back.

"Partially." I mumbled with my head lowered.

Why did he have to bring this up? However sulking won't help so I lightened up and restarted with a cheery mood.

"You know, I just feel a bit sad that you have nobody that takes care of you when you're sick. I enjoy the company of people and leading a lonely life is out of the question!"

"Am I that depressing?"

I nodded straightforwardly without looking at him.

"Well I cannot blame you. You were born and raised as a shinobi. I can understand this fear of getting too attached to something or someone. Indeed, the damage is big…"

I felt it was a delicate topic, but I wanted to talk, lighten the burden around my heart.

"However what about those who love somebody so deeply and are treated with indifference? What becomes of them? Are they forced to give up those feelings for good and live a life of solitude and regret?" I sighed hopelessly.

"Bullshit! Love can complicate ones life, right Kaka…"

As I turned around, I silenced down when I found him soundly and deeply sleeping. Frustrated that I talked to a sleeping figure for the passed ten minutes maybe, I got up and took the bowl with me. I dumped its contents into the sink and watched as it swirled down into the drain. Were my feelings going to end up like this? Like the water going down the drain? Helplessly I slammed my fist on the counter. My eyes begun to burn and no later the tears rolled down my cheeks. Was it going to end up like with Steve? Where I cannot reveal my feelings in time? The mere thought of it, drowned me into misery that I found myself on the kitchen floor, sobbing quietly.

The remainder of the day, I was silent and gloomy as the grave. I tended Kakashi from time to time, but retreated to my room and sulked even more. I thought I had forgotten everything about Steve, every feeling, all misery and depression. Amazing that a single emotion could trigger a complete chaos. As Kakashi was sleeping throughout the day and only got up to go to the bathroom, it was very boring and more depressing. He was too sick to speak and I wasn't blaming him for my gloomy mood, but I was angry with myself that I thought about the past. To get rid of those thoughts I decided to do some housework. Until sunset I was mopping, scrubbing, washing, rinsing and wiping everything clean. I felt rather relaxed afterwards and very proud about how productive I was. From time to time I noticed Kakashi stirring in his sleep and muttering something, but I knew it was the fever causing that. To take a break, I opened the window of the living room and climbed out onto the roof. I sat there; leaning back with my arms outstretched backward supporting me and gazed into the starry sky. The air was cool and the wind whirred through the cosy village of Konoha. It was quiet, not unusually quiet, but peacefully quiet. The lights blinked and flashed and distantly you could hear the chattering of individuals. The air carried the fragrance of grass and leaves, mingled with fried food and ramen. I closed my eyes, taken in the fragrance and opened my eyes as I exhaled it serenely. My mind was emptied from all worries and trouble in the world. It's rare to find a place, in which one feels such at ease. I plumped back against the tiled and uneven roof. I stared to the sky, absorbed by its beauty.


	16. Chapter 15

**Heya again. I'll keep it short for you guys. I'll publish two chapters for you!! Hope you enjoy it!! Wish y'all a great new School Year, a new beginning at work and so on. I'd be as usual grateful for any reviews. ENJOY!!**

* * *

**CHAPTER FIFTEEN**

- An A-rank mission?! -

The next day, Kakashi was lively as usual. Which I means he was back with his teasing attitude; except that this time he restrained himself from crossing the line. This morning I caught him glancing at me with a melancholic face, but he quickly looked away as if nothing happened. As I was going to ask him about this, he quickly changed the subject by starting another topic. Then when I was on the verge of getting the information out of him, somebody pounded at the door and we headed to the door. Kakashi opened it and there stood the assistant of Tsunade, Hagane Kotetsu. He had blackish purple hair with a thin bandage overlapping across of his face and over his ridge. His chin had a triangular shaped cloth covering it. His eyes were sharp as usual and he looked at Kakashi and me.

"Hokage sama wants to see you both." He declared and Kakashi and I exchanged astonished looks.

Kotetsu guided us to the empty Ninja academy grounds and there stood Tsunade, deep in conversation with some of the Jounins and Chuunins. Amongst them I found that typical frowning and complaining face, Nara Shikamaru. Lots of brain, but it takes him time to get engaged into the whole game. Otherwise he's the first one to drop out with, "What a drag." I would always laugh when he said that stuff. I glanced around; looking at the windows where teachers spoke to students who listened eagerly. At least in the shinobi academy you learned something useful and it never was boring.

"Does the academy interest you?" asked Kakashi who noticed me staring at the School.

"Yep. I wish I had studied in such a School, at least you learn cool stuff."

Kakashi chuckled, finding it amusing my answer. I did sound like a kid, but I didn't care. Tsunade took notice of us and stopped talking to the shinobis who turned their attention to Kakashi and I. Shikamaru seemed to be showing some interest finally.

"Kakashi, Sara, I have an important matter to discuss with you."

Kotetsu let us walk over to the group of shinobis, who still stared at me. Then as we stood beside Tsunade, she turned over to us.

"Kakashi, I need you to go on an A-rank mission." She promptly stated.

"All Jounins except for you are on missions."

"Ah."

Kakashi looked at me and back at Tsunade, did she only called us here for this? Noticing that I wasn't the only person who thought it was strange, he questioned her coolly.

"Isn't there a reason that you called us both here?"

Her attention finally caught me and then she looked at Kakashi.

"Do you think she could handle such a mission with you as supervision?"

All shinobis that were gathered around Tsunade gave an appalling gasp and I could not blame them for that. A-Rank missions were only reserved to Jounins or higher and not ideal for a low ranking shinobi such as myself who possessed no ranking at all! A-Rank mission are below S ranking missions, which meant a lot of mortal peril and maybe sever injuries! I gaped at Tsunade, has she gone out of her mind completely? Already I heard loud complaints.

"Tsunade sama, this is outrageous! She isn't legally a shinobi!"

"How can we trust a foreigner, who's got absolutely no knowledge of being a shinobi?"

"How can we be sure that she can be trusted?"

The more complaints I heard the more self conscious and miserable I became. I too was shocked of Tsunade's sudden decision, but I never imagined devaluating my fighting abilities, I was strong and I knew that, but I was uncertain if I was compatible enough for an A-Rank mission.

"Kakashi, didn't you tell me she was an outstanding fighter?" confirmed Tsunade and looked at him.

Wow! I never thought Kakashi, considered me as an outstanding fighter.

"Yea, I did."

"Good, can she demonstrate it here? Okay, you are her opponent." She ordered with her firm tone, to one Chuunin and as he came out of the crowd.

We both pointed at each other, staring at each other agape. Oh…my…God! There stood Iruka, staring also bewildered as me. Kakashi gave an amused and interested "Oh," which I replied with a glare.

"Can I switch opponent?" I squeaked.

"Why?" insisted Tsunade impatiently.

"Because…" I looked in the circle, hell I definitely wasn't going to tell anybody why.

"Sara, it's fine." Said Iruka calmly and I shook my head.

I could feel everybody staring at us curiously, wondering what's our relation to each other, but it was out of the question to beat him! Not a guy who just confessed to me?! "It isn't fine for me, Iruka! Please, get me another opponent!" I insisted impatiently and looked at Tsunade, who gave me a glare.

"You sure are wasting my time! Kakashi! You are her opponent!" snapped Tsunade.

It wasn't any better! I preferred Iruka over Kakashi, but asking to switch again would make Tsunade furious. With a nervous swallow I looked at Kakashi, with a flick of his head we walked further away from the group. As we walked along each other, Kakashi whispered in an amused tone.

"A good choice don't you think? Instead of sticking with lover boy?"

"Shut it will you!" I hissed back in a low tone, cautiously glancing back at the crowd hoping they haven't heard a thing.

"Don't hold back, give your best shot."

"I can't!" I shushed, but Kakashi didn't reply as he positioned himself in one place.

I positioned myself across of him, separated by a spacious gap. He gave me a reassuring look, which did not help me either. For God's sake! I was going to beat up the guy I love! Why does misfortune plague me so? I didn't do anything bad! I stood stiffly, looking at him.

"You are ready to start!" called Tsunade.

Kakashi and I didn't move and stared at each other. I had to prepare myself mentally, but somehow the excitement bubbled in me, giving me the opportunity to strike back and that was a chance of a lifetime! He harmed me a lot anyways, so some butt kicking should be fair enough. Sweet revenge. A smirk crossed my lips and I vanished into thin air underneath the very crowd. I darted from one place to another, zigzagging as I stormed towards him in high speed. However he vanished as well, surprising me from the left with a soaring fist in which I dodged in the right timing. Then another fist came and I deflected it with my arm. The leaves and loose dirt repelled outwards at our movements. We kept our gaze fixed to another, but I was getting too distracted by his eyes that I received a powerful punch in the jaw which made me flip backwards and land several meters away on my feet. Blood trickled down from my lips; I wiped it with the back of my palm with my gaze locked to Kakashi's. It was evident that I shouldn't use seducing tactics because it would be too embarrassing! I stood there thinking what I should do. It dawned to me right away I had to demonstrate my fighting skills, don't I? It's anyway damn obvious that Kakashi was stronger and experienced than I and if I won against him it would raise some suspicion! To my displeasure I would actually have to hold back. I stood sideways and parted my legs and looked up. Filled with confidence, with my index finger I indicated in a wave motion to Kakashi that he's welcomed to attack me first. He gave a nod and stormed towards me. I will show you, all of you, who Hanshin Sara really is! I could tell he was preparing his fist to strike and I waited till he was close enough. Now! His fist soared passed my face and I punched him in the stomach, lifting him off the ground. I jumped up, joining him, but he was already ready to receive me and passed me a shower of fists and kicks. We came close to the ground, so we flipped backwards and as I made contact with one foot to the ground, I bounced off. Soaring straight to him and missing him by millimetres, I caused an immense crater on the ground. Not worn out by the slightest use of my chakara and receiving several gasp of horror and stupefy by the crowd. I raised myself with my clenched fist and turned over to Kakashi, keeping a calm and expressionless composure and attacked Kakashi. I fought faster, unpredictably and with roughness. Now Kakashi used his weapons as to keep me off, he threw a kunai which grazed my cheek and I threw him one, which he of course dodged without difficulty. I took my kunai and stormed to him, he as well and we found each other blocking each other's kunai against another. Struggling with equal strength against each other, my blade slipped and cut his hand a bit, causing the blood to squirt over my blade. Shock and nausea overcame me, as his blood dripped from my blade. Easily distracted, I was too late to dodge his attack. I flipped backwards several meters, gripping my right arm which dangled motionlessly paralyzed with pain and I gasped painfully and dropped on one knee. Blood dripped from my finger tips to the ground. Kakashi managed to cut my forearm and I exhaled through gritted teeth to soothe the pain and look at him. I never was cut by somebody and the pain was imaginable. Kakashi stared at me, a bit horrified. Judging by his tense face, he was expecting me to dodge that attack. Something overcame me and no sooner I found myself, punching Kakashi off of his feet that he soared scraping the ground along with him.

"That's enough for now!" called Tsunade promptly.

I turned my head to the crowd. I found them all gaping at me, with bewilderment and disbelief. The pain in my arm seared and I tried my best to ignore it. Kakashi was back on his feet with a bruise on his cheek, but he was okay. Since she was expecting us to come to her we walked back to the crowd. With my gaze sunk to the ground and ignoring Kakashi and everybody else, I walked back to them.

"Kakashi, you did a splendid job! You trained this girl only within a month and look how strong she has become!" praised Tsunade proudly.

I did not see the point of celebrating about it. The memory stabbed my heart of Kakashi's blood flowing down my blade. I felt nauseas, drained and repulsed. Again I heard the shinobis exchanging baffled statements.

"How could a mere stranger with no knowledge of a shinobi, become so strong within a month?"

"Judging by her fighting style she seemed to have known since the beginning the shinobi fighting style."

"Her chakara amount is impressive! She never seemed to have over exerted herself!"

Those statements did not bring my morale up, I felt like I murdered somebody and I wanted to disappear from this place immediately.

"I'll let you two get yourself fixed up, but tonight I want to see you Kakashi to discuss the details about the mission."

Finally we were able to leave the crowd and I cast a last glance on the distorted area. An icy silence roamed over us, as we jumped from roof to another. I did not dare look at Kakashi nor speak at him and I could sense that Kakashi was aware of my unusual silent behaviour. As we stepped into the apartment, Kakashi spoke up.

"Sara, are you okay?" he asked me as he stood behind me.

"…" I did not reply, barely paid the slightest attention to him.

A wall has formed around me, which blocked the feelings I should feel and the noise. I staggered about through the hallway, my knees feeling wobbly and my hands trembling to support me. I slapped my hand over my mouth and walked into the bathroom and sunk in front of the toilet. The images flashed in front of my eyes and I got sick over the toilet. Coughing and retching with tears streaming and at a blink of an eye the memory repeated; his blood dripped in my hand. I was so afraid that I was going to kill him! I was afraid that demon was going to kill him! Why was I so weak? I looked at my white trembling hands and suddenly groped my injury and was shocked to find that it was healed. I groped my face and I realized also my cut was gone. I got up and clutched my head. I was turning to a monster! Then Kakashi's hand rested on my shoulder, but I jumped out of his reach and ran out of the bathroom.

"Hey, what's going on, Sara?" he sounded very concerned and followed me.

He got a hold of my right arm and seemed to have realized something strange, as he rolled up my sleeve and paused.

"Your injury is already healed?!"

"I know!" I sobbed frightfully, hiccoughing and still not looking at him.

"Why are you behaving like this?"

I only gave heavy sobs as a response. Than rather abruptly he wrenched me around, showing his growing impatience and concern.

"Tell me, what's going on!"

I tried to pull my hand out of his grip, but instead he pulled me into his arms and embraced me. I struggled against him violently.

"Let me go!" I panicked.

It was too much, all those emotions piling up. Anguish dominated my mind. I had to stay away from him before I harm him any further. Then he shoved me against the wall, pinning my wrists against the wall and his face look hard on me.

"Calm down, Sara! Please tell me what's wrong!"

As it helped me to come back to my senses, I lowered my head and sobbed miserably and fearfully.

"I'm so afraid - so afraid!"

"Afraid of what?" he asked me now, cupping my cheeks so that I looked at him in the eyes.

"I was afraid that I killed you!"

Unexpectedly Kakashi embraced me so tightly like his life depended on it, while caressing my head.

"It's okay; I'm here, its okay." He whispered gently with comforting words and kept on holding me.

We stood there for what seems like ages, he was cradling me in his arms and whispering to me gently. It was the first that he showed some care in such a way. It seemed all too strange and abnormal for his character. It was like another element was suddenly included to his character, making him foreign to me. However his tender voice and warmth soothed me like a lullaby and no sooner I found myself sleeping in his arms.

I woke up the next day in my bed. The light flooded through the curtains above my head, blinding my sight and I rolled on my sides into the shade. I lay there, blinking until my eye sight was clearer and not showing some purple patches. It took me some time to wake up and get out of bed. For some odd reason I was very exhausted, I grabbed my things and motioned out of the room into the bathroom. The whole flat was quiet. Was Kakashi still sleeping? Or did he go out?

With damped hair, I swung the towel around my neck and went to the kitchen. As I passed the living room I found the sofa empty and the blankets curled up at the end. He must've gone out. In the kitchen I attacked some of the left-overs and ate quietly. It sure was silent, not even the slightest noise of the neighbours or nature was heard. What the hell was wrong? As I nibbled on the sushi, it struck me like an ice cold shower, horrified I dropped my food.

"Oh no… Isn't it supposed to be the day where Kakashi and I must go on a mission?"

I began to panic and looked at the watch. 10 AM?! I jumped up and was about to dash to the bedroom, where I heard the entrance door click open and there stepped Kakashi with his hands filled with grocery bags. When he noticed me his eyes crinkle into a cheerful face.

"'Morning, finally awake?"

I just nodded dumbly and suddenly all what happened yesterday flushed through my system causing me to feel queasy and embarrassed. I must admit I did overreact yesterday, who in their right minds – especially in the shinobi world – would start to cry for only hurting… a close friend in a duel? Kakashi noticed my evasive behaviour and suddenly handed me some of the grocery bags.

"Those are our provisions for the mission. So if you don't mind, I would need a hand."

Again I just nodded and went to the kitchen followed by Kakashi. We placed the grocery on the kitchen table and unpacked everything. Only the sound of plastic ruffling against another filled the room with noise, otherwise we remained silent, sunken deeply in our own thoughts. I glanced at Kakashi, his uncovered eye was fixed on the objects and food that he was unpacking and turned away to place the food into the fridge or else where. I bit my lip. Sara! This is the worst solution! Keeping yourself quiet and feeling embarrassed will not solve the problem, won't it? So go for it! Say something at least!

"I'm sorry for overreacting yesterday." I apologized abruptly.

"For what?"

"Uhm, you know, uh, for…Anyway forget it."

"Ah! You mean for loosing your nerves? Ah well it happens to the best." He turned to me with a cheerful attitude.

I just stared at him agape. It was the most embarrassing, actually the second most embarrassing – thing that happened to me and he acknowledges it as if it was something tiny. It was partially a relief but on the other hand it took me off guard. Since when did Kakashi show such consideration towards me? Did he know I would feel uncomfortable if he would bring up that topic? Then he smacked my head and I clutched my head, looking at him with a scorn.

"Hey, sleepy head! Let me remind you that in 2 hours we have to depart for our mission."

"What in 2 hours?!" I spluttered aghast, checking the watch as time ticked by.

"But-but, what do I need to take with me?"

"Your basic necessities."

"Like what?"

Kakashi rolled his eye in annoyance.

"Did you ever travel in your life?"

I nodded excitedly and started listing down with my fingers where I went.

"I went to America, Korea, Germany, France, and Austria-

-Whatever! ... Sounds like a bunch of diseases to me anyway…Do you get what I mean?"

I nodded slowly but then shook my head, he wasn't clear. After all missions and vacations are entirely different, on missions you have a guarantee that your stuff might get ripped or lost and on vacations you just relax. Kakashi gave a hopeless sigh. Then he walked away, grabbing my wrist and dragging me along with him to the bedroom. He pulled out two rucksacks and threw them on the bed.

"Where are your stuff?"

I pointed to one corner, where my things were, inside a plastic bag. He marched over there and just simply grabbed some of my clothes and went over to one rucksack and put them inside. I was somewhat appalled that he so carelessly took my things without second thought, clearly disrespecting my privacy.

"It's okay, I get it. Now will you please take your paws off of my stuff?" I insisted with impatience and walked over to him, but he abruptly turned around with a hand full of my underwear.

My jaw dropped and might've been dislocated by now!

"What in God's name are you doing with my underwear?" I exclaimed with embarrassment, wrenching my underwear out of his hands with a red face and throwing it into my rucksack.

"You forgot something." He supplied

I turned around and my face grew another shade darker. From his index finger dangled my black bra and his face displayed a mischief face. I stormed over to grab it, but he pulled it away in time.

"Kakashi! Give it back to me!" I snapped, trying to fetch it, but he managed to pull it away.

It was like a game of cat and mouse, I was the cat and Kakashi was the mouse who was teasing me. Once again he was fooling around with me. The more he pulled away, the more frustrated and embarrassed I got and the worst was Kakashi was enjoying my helplessness.

"Kakashi, give it back! It's no funny!"

"Well I think it is, especially seeing your cute red face." He added with a chuckle.

From the distance it looked absolutely ridiculous! I looked like a kid who was desperately trying to get its toy back from the big bully. I was getting more and more humiliated until I whined.

"Give it back."

"Not until you do a striptease for me."

My eyes popped out of my head and my jaw went slack.

"Ehhhh?! Whaat?!"

My face flamed up once again. This guy was disgusting! Kakashi started to laugh and I took advantage of this moment to grab my bra and to throw him out of the room and slam the door shut in his face. With a huff I turned back to my packing.

The packing was easier said than done, I've spent a decade putting all my necessities in and hesitated which outfit I should take and finally Kakashi came in and simply threw a pair in the bag. Already his teasing tour was forgotten and he was his old self again, being cheerful or in his teacher-mode. Finally we were completely prepared and left his apartment for the eastern Gates of Konoha. As we weren't in a hurry, we walked casually through the busy streets of Konoha, encountering many fellow Genins and Jounins. Lastly we signed out at the desk beside the Eastern Gate which was guarded by Kotetsu and Izumo. Then we stepped out of the gates and out of Konoha.

"Oh man I'm so excited! We are going on a mission, we are going on a mission!" I squealed gleefully and pranced around like an overexcited child, which finally was allowed to do something it was striving for.

"Hey, don't go jumping around like an idiot. Be vigilant and sharp, there might be enemies hiding up ahead."

I turned around and just waved it off with a ridiculous scoff.

"Impossible! Not nearby Konoha, only when we are miles away, maybe yea."

A sigh came from Kakashi.

"You still have to learn."

Ignoring his remark, I turn to him and walk beside him.

"Anyway where are we going?"

"To the country of water."

"You mean Kirigakure?"

"Yep, except we are going to another village nearby."

"What we gotta do?"

Kakashi stopped in his tracks and looked at me, as if I had gone stupid.

"Enough with the questioning, Sara! An A-rank mission is something that must be taken seriously and I will not tolerate carelessness and stupidity!" he told me with a grave but sharp tone, resulting me to lose my grin and happy mood.

"This is not a game! You may lose your life in this mission, if you slack off! I'll be the supervisor and your teacher, so I expect from now on that you execute any of my orders without a word, are we clear?"

I nodded without a word and he turned away to lead the way. I stood there for a moment staring at his distancing figure, why did he scold me? I was only asking what our mission was and he makes a big thing out of it, Sheesh! What did he eat this morning? I caught up with Kakashi, following him behind and he lead the way through the dense forest of the fire country.


	17. Chapter 16

**Here's another chapie!! Thanks for all reviews until now, it has given me so much motivation and strength. Don't worry I'll still update the story!! ENJOY!! **

* * *

**CHAPTER SIXTEEN**

- The sweet and bitterness of Hell -

We travelled through the trees, skipping from one bough to another, cutting quickly through the forest. As Kakashi was in the front and I in the back, it was difficult to keep up with his pace. I mean, who in his rights mind – and I mean in my world- would jump like some sort of retarded monkey from one tree to another? That's why we have legs and means of transport, to stick on the ground! And the worst is it gets boring after a moment, because the same bloody boughs keep appearing coincidently at each leg reach. I bet if I would bind my eyes, I still would be stepping on the next bough! What added more oil to the fire, was Kakashi silent-as-the-grave behaviour. I was frustrated of his sudden change of behaviour. I can understand that he takes the mission seriously, but is it a sin to actually be cheerful, or to socialize with him? Within the 3 hours we travelled, not once did he look back nor said a word. Therefore my patience burned through.

"You know, it wouldn't hurt if you could say something."

"…"

"Okay, fine! Continue to ignore me!"

There was a moment of silence, we hopped through the trees and then I sighed.

"I can understand that you take this mission seriously, but it doesn't mean that I have no right to speak or to be enthusiastic?"

"We'll take a break in an hour, so don't stray behind." He said, ignoring that I actually spoke to him.

I groaned with frustration and sided with him, jumping beside him and glaring at him.

"Tell me Kakashi, what is your problem, huh! Is it the fact that you cannot stand my presence? Than if it is the case, then why in God's name did you take me along with you?!"

I was anticipating a reply; however he didn't show the slightest reaction to me. I was like a ghost flying along with him, nothing more.

"Jerk!" I grumbled and decided to fall back to let him lead the way.

The hour drifted by fortunately quickly enough and no sooner we jumped down the boughs to land on solid forest ground, which my legs and feet cried with relief. The sun was slowly setting and the sky was turning pinkish blue, rendering the forest darker and thicker. In some areas the sun shone through leaves, beaming its greenish rays of light down onto the forest ground. It was like an enchanted forest, so serene, so harmonious and untouched. We had stopped at one place and I was marvelling the sight of the forest, when his strict voice interrupted the peace within me.

"Hey Sara, stop spacing around and eat something. Our destination is still several miles away and I intend to get over with it by night fall."

I dropped my bag to the ground and dropped myself to soft forest ground and rummaged through my bag to get my food. Not in the mood to neither see him nor hear him I turned my back on him and was relaxingly eating and enjoying my late lunch. With content I listened and watched the nature around me. The leaves rustle as the squirrels scampered from one branch to another and exchanging noises with their partners. The wind whirred gently and peacefully through the forest, carrying with it the fragrance of moist moss and other unknown fragrances. At least every animal or element had its purpose in nature and never were left out for x-reasons, everything was created to cooperate and be balanced, how wonderful. I realized I was once again day dreaming and quickly ate my lunch and packed my things up again, before hearing Kakashi's cool and serious voice.

"Are you ready?"

I simply nodded without looking at him.

"Good. If we speed up our pace, we might get to our destination within 2 hours-

-Whatever! Just lead the way!" I interrupted him sharply and began to walk back to the place where we strayed from.

It took Kakashi a moment to catch up, but finally he was leading the way, quietly and pensively. We jumped back to the bough and there our interrupted journey continued through the boring path in the trees.

The two hours flew by quickly because of our increased pace. I was exhausted, my legs were trembling and aching and my eye lids were feeling very heavy. I yawned loudly, before I complained to Kakashi.

"Are we there yet?"

"…"

"Kakashi?"

"…"

"Kakashi."

"…"

"Kakashi!!"

After not getting a reply for 3 times, my patience burned through with me so that I exclaimed with impatience.

"ARE-WE-THERE-YET-?"

"Calm down! You are so noisy you know!" he retorted sharply and since I was appalled of his reaction I argued back fiercely.

"Calm down, you say? How can I calm down if I am so damn tiered, you insensitive jerk?!"

Kakashi abruptly stopped on one bough, so that I bumped face first into his broad back, stumbling backwards and wobbling over the edge of the bough. Kakashi was quick enough to lace one arm around my back and grab my wrist and pull me back on the bough. My face turned slightly pink at his closeness and his touches, but luckily the dimness of the night concealed my blush and I diverted my gaze. His arm still was laced around my lower back and his hand griped my wrist.

"First of all I forbid you to talk to me in this tone! If you don't have the guts to pull through, then why haven't you stayed in Konoha?"

No matter how strict he sounded or behaved, it did not affect me the slightest. I was preoccupied staring at him in his uncovered and dark eye. A moment of silence roamed between us, where I just stared at him. Kakashi stared back at me getting as the seconds passed more and more confused of my "staring parade". My legs gave in and Kakashi was still able to hold me with his arm around my back.

"You really have poor stamina."

"And who is to blame? Who's the one who kept pushing me?"

Kakashi did not reply, or maybe showed that he didn't care, but the next thing he did surely caught me off guard.

"I'll carry you, then."

"You, whaat?!"

"I'll carry you on my back."

"Ehm, uhm, well, uhm." I stuttered nervously with the colour rising in my cheeks.

He turned his back on me and kneeled down.

"Come on." He indicated, showing his readiness to carry me.

After a couple of moments of hesitation, I climbed on his back and he stood up, hoisting me well against his back. I wrapped my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist and held firmly. I was stressed about my hammering heart and was praying that he wouldn't feel them. Also resting my head against his shoulder and generally feeling his body warmth gave my heart another summersault. I don't know how long my heart would hold out without bursting.

"Are you ready?" he asked

"Yea." I croaked, realizing how strangled my voice sounded.

Luckily Kakashi did not pay attention and started jumping from bough to another.

For the first couple of minutes was hell, but after a moment I got used to this bumpy ride. Not only I began to feel more at ease, but also I felt comfortable enough to rest my head against his shoulder and that was where he noticed it.

"What are you doing?"

"Resting." I yawned tiredly.

"Sara, stay awake! I'm not intending to put you to bed."

"Okay." I yawned exhaustedly and watched over his shoulder in front.

I was amazed that he managed to keep his balance while holding me and jumping from one bough to another.

"You are so strong and skilled. You can keep your balance while carrying a person, that's cool." I complimented him slowly and quietly, once again resting my head against his shoulder.

His insides rumbled with a suave chuckle.

"You babble weird stuff when you are sleepy, is that normal?"

I gave a short chuckle.

"But I mean it…you are so strong, loyal and cool…maybe that is why I admire you so much…" I mumbled sleepily, dozing off to a light sleep.

"Hey, Sara, Sara, wake up!" called Kakashi, but his voice gradually faded away and for sure I was asleep.

I woke up the next morning, blinded by the blazing beams of the rising sun, the twittering of the birds nearby and the distant sound of running water. The wind whirred peacefully, carrying the lasting fragrance of the morning dew and burned wood. I sat up and rubbed the sleep out of my eyes. I gazed around me, taking in the surroundings. I was sleeping in a sleeping bag on the soft forest floor and across of the remainders of the extinguished fire was Kakashi sleeping. The embers glowed faintly and judging by the misty and dampness of the air, it was dawn. Now I could hear the water running nearby, it was surely a river. I checked my clothes and realized I was still wearing my things, except that I had an extra sweater on. Then my memories came back, flushing my happiness out of my system and replacing it with embarrassment and red cheeks. Gosh! He must be seriously thinking I am mental! I looked over to his sleeping figure his back was facing my direction and he seemed to be resting serenely. I got out of my sleeping bag quietly and cautiously, grabbed my bag to follow the sound of rushing water. Close by was a wide and shallow river. I never seen such pure and clean water in my life, usually it was devastated by all sorts of garbage. I dropped my bag near to shore and kneeled down to throw some water against my face. I grinned to myself with pleasure; the water was cold but felt great and refreshing. I had the desire to go for a swim, so I moved to a well covered area, near the rocks and stripped myself naked and slid into the water. A shrill went down my spine, it was damn cold, but woke me up like ten cups of coffee! I bathed in a covered area, near the rocks and enjoyed sitting calmly with a blank mind.

I returned to our camping site with a towel thrown over my shoulder and my damp blond locks falling gracefully down my shoulders. Kakashi was up and met me with a cheerful face.

"Had a nice swim?"

I stared at him agape with horror and somewhat defensively covering myself.

"How did you know?"

Kakashi noticed my stressed attitude and walked over to me with an overconfident look.

"If you think I went to sneak a peek to your pleasure, well I must disappoint you, I didn't. If you would meet my expectations, then yes I would have joined you."

My face turned bright red, quickly to hide my embarrassed and horrified face I crossed my arms and snorted with contempt. He sure did know how to tease people and bring them to blush, but he wasn't going to get me that easily. I eyed him sternly and spoke firmly to him.

"Let me reassure you that if you had joined me, I would have scratched your eye balls out!"

I could tell Kakashi was smirking to his advantage and it only meant it won't be easy to defend myself this time. He leaned forward, coming to my eye level, his gaze as piercing as usual.

"I can warn you already, if I had joined you…you'd be moaning my name by now."

This time Kakashi went over the line! My jaw went slack and my face burned red and nothing in the World hid it. This guy was anything, but strong, loyal and cool, he was a damn pervert! Far worse than Jiraya - no, actually ranking the same level as him! Some revulsion came up and I backed away from him and I shouted with disgust.

"You are so disgusting, you pervert!"

Rather swiftly and unpredictably I punched him across his face and he staggered backwards, clutching his cheek.

"That's what you get, you paedophile!" I retorted and began packing up my things.

"Sara, I was only kidding."

"Kidding?!" I scoffed, I stop packing and I stormed to him, poking him with my index finger against his chest, making him back up.

"Well it sounded real enough, that I lost my sense of security around you. I don't know, maybe you'll ambush me in my sleep or whatever! But I must leave!" I turned away from him with my bag in my hand, ready to walk away from him.

Kakashi dropped his hand from his cheek and trotted after me.

"Sara, seriously I was only joking, I didn't mean to scare-

-Scare me? What could possibly scare me? That my so-called "sensei" turns out to be a sex maniac, running after younger girls?!"

"I certainly am not what you think I am! You got it all wrong! I just like to tease you, that's all!"

"What you did before wasn't teasing! Teasing has some limit you know, any sensible person would feel where to stop. The problem was "that" sounded too real."

Kakashi just groaned and rolled his eye.

"You donkey, you should have admitted that I was scaring you than I would have stopped."

"I wasn't afraid!"

"Yes, you were!"

"No, I wasn't!"

"Yes, you were! That would explain why you are running away."

Not a word could come out of my mouth; it was like my argument vanished in a puff of smoke. It was impossible to contradict him, but I couldn't admit I was afraid, not in this world or else where. I dropped my bag on the ground and lowered my gaze to the side. Kakashi's hand was about to place itself on my shoulder, but I slapped it away.

"Just stay away from me, for now." I walked away from him and headed back to the river.

I dropped to the shore and threw miserably some stones into the river. What a jerk! Actually, I am the jerk! Hitting him, then calling him a pervert and paedophile, was really brainless! In fact I don't know why I got mad at him! Was it maybe because I felt uneasy about his teasing or was I really scared? However I gave a thought about what he said and end up jumping to my feet shaking my red face with embarrassment. For Goodness sake! He's 26 and I am 18! Eight years difference! He's practically like my teacher and I'm his student or worse a brother or an uncle?! A chill of disgust went down my spine at the mere thought of it and I pulled a grimace. After a moment of struggling with all those thoughts I finally gave in with a groan.

"What's the point of overreacting about this? Men are meant to be annoying and mischievous! So for the next time I must be well prepared for his next attack!" I grumbled and took a determined pose.

To let some of the steam out I marched along the shore, kicking the stones as I walked and thinking of a tactic to face Kakashi without getting embarrassed or humiliated. Finally I gathered enough courage to turn back to the camp site. Kakashi was friendly enough to have cleaned my sleeping place up and put it into my bag nicely. Whatever, if he was trying to change my mind, then I'm sorry, he still has got a long way to go. Then I heard some rustling in the bushes and I instinctively pulled out my kunai, vigilantly staring at the source of the noise. Kakashi came forth and with an annoyed sigh I put my kunai away and readjusted the contents of my bag.

"Well at least you were alarmed by my presence, that's good." Mentioned Kakashi and I didn't look nor gave him a sign that I was paying attention to him.

Kakashi stood still, looking down to me when I was busy rearranging my rucksack.

"I'm really sorry, Sara, I-

-Don't you have enough already!" I interrupted him, jumping to my feet and giving him a scowl, "Let's get going! I believe we got still some miles to travel to the water country."

Kakashi then nodded, he wanted to say something but decided to abandon that idea. We packed our things up, cleaned the area, hiding the embers and erasing our traces. It was a lot of work, especially if we didn't want to be followed by any shinobi. However as we set off through the forest, I had this strange sensation on my back that something or somebody was following us. So many times I looked over my shoulders back into the forest. I looked attentively at each single thing, but I saw nothing, no shadow or human figure. Then Kakashi's presence along side me, startled me and he questioned me with a serious tone.

"What is it?"

I looked back at him, uncertain how to answer him or even afraid to tell some nonsense, I decided to lie.

"It's nothing, I was just thinking if I have forgotten something."

"Really…"

By the tone of his voice and his look I could tell he wasn't convinced of my answer, but I prefer telling something that is accurate than a blunder. Noticing that I was speaking to him again and that he were next to me - I kept some distance from him by falling back. Was that a strategy to get me talking to him again? Sheesh! That guy is more annoying than I thought!

"Why are you falling back?"

"Just like that." I replied curtly and no sooner he was again next to me, hopping from tree branch to another.

"I think it's more convenient like that."

"Yea, maybe for you but not for me."

"Now, what's with the pessimistic attitude?"

I rolled my eyes and scowled at him.

"Let me remind you that you started the whole thing!"

"You are still angry about that!" His eyes wide with confusion.

"Of course! Now would you mind to stay away from me and stop talking to me?" I snapped at him and fixed my gaze straight in front of me.

Kakashi gave up talking to me and we continued our journey in utter silence.

It's been going like this for the past three days, nothing but old stinking forest came our way! Throughout the day we travelled non-stop, our breaks were rationed to 15 minutes and our paces quickened. As a result I felt lousy and extremely annoyed during the three days and Kakashi and I became literally strangers. We barely spoke or looked at each other, well I certainly was ignoring him, but I wasn't sure if he was ignoring me. I did feel he was observing me, but it grew to habit so I did not pay attention anymore to it. I really did not imagine that a shinobi life would be so strenuous and harsh! For some time I thought Kakashi was taking revenge on me, but after I realized it was just that we had a certain deadline to reach our final destination and already Kirigakure is so damn far away from Konoha! Not to imagine the distance I did in a day, I'm sure if I put all my walking records that I did in my lifetime, it would not make up with the miles of running and jumping I've done in the passed days! Plus I had to carry a rucksack with me, adding several more kilos to give me more muscle pain! Also what annoyed me even more, the temperature during the night came to zero, causing me to freeze halfway to death over the night! The problem was we still were sleeping on the cold floor without a bloody shelter!! Kakashi slept soundlessly and peacefully without the worry of the world that maybe his companion might freeze to death! No matter if there was a camp fire, no matter if I put billions of layers on, I still was shaking and freezing and that would explain my irritable behaviour throughout the day. It was also a sign that we were nearing the realm of Kiri. The day time was still tolerable, but it did increasingly become colder and also did the night. My stamina deteriorated and so as my awareness. I just followed Kakashi like a blind dog that's using its nose and ears to find its way. I don't know if Kakashi was paying attention to me, he seemed to be absorbed to the mission, whereas I was engulfed by my torture.

By the end of the third day in the late night, we diverted from our journey to set up a camp. This time it was in the dense forest, filled with pine trees and other trees from the winter season. Then all of a sudden Kakashi dropped his bag on the ground with a thud and appointed this area as our encampment.

"We well camp here for tonight."

I didn't give a sound and also dropped my bag to the ground, already leaving to do my usual chore, to collect some fire wood. I walked with a flash light in my hand, snapping and ripping off branches from trees or collecting them from the ground. The forest was too dark and creepy for me and it did begin to pick on my nerves. Once again I believed somebody was watching or following me. Always when I turned back and pointed my flashlight in one area there was nothing. I felt too sure that something was lurking in the shadow either waiting for me to get distracted and attack me. I quickly grabbed the wood I found and marched quickly back to the camp. For some reason, panic and fear overtook me and I found myself running to the encampment. When I burst out in front of the encampment, I found Kakashi working on a tent which he managed to build up in less then five minutes of my absence. He looked at me then got up to his feet and walked over to me.

"What's wrong Sara, why are you out of breath and pale?" he questioned me and scanned my appearance closely.

I was beginning to get nervous and so I walked passed him to avoid his constant interrogation, to set up a camp fire nearby the tent. Desperately trying to focus on getting it set up with my trembling hands and ignoring Kakashi's presence, I heard him advancing behind me.

"You are behaving very strange in the passed days. You become very secretive and abnormally quiet for some strange reason. I doubt it's got to do with me, doesn't it?"

I did not answer and tried to focus on preparing the fire, although it was failing dramatically since my hands were trembling and weak.

"Let me do it." He said and came down next to me and in a swift motion, he made a fire.

Then he turned his head to look at me, but I quickly diverted my gaze and promptly got up to get our food. Tonight we had some ramen, very simple as this and I did not complain about it, at least some food. However I wasn't looking forward to going to sleep, since I'm sure it was going to be the same difficulty as usual. Kakashi's eyes lingered on me sometime, but he looked away soon as I looked up to him. I felt like he wanted to say something but did not find the courage to do so.

"You sure don't look well tonight; I think you should get some rest."

"What about my watch?"

"I'll do it first."

"Ah, okay."

The sound of his concerned voice warmed my heart up so that my opinion about him began to change.

"You can sleep in the tent." he suggested and I looked at him with confusion and somehow disbelief.

"And what about you?"

"I'll find somewhere to sleep, don't worry, just go and rest."

I accepted his nice offer and slipped into the narrow tent. It was small, but cosy enough for one person. I was worried about Kakashi, where would he sleep? I hope not outside in this cold? I was so overtaken by exhaustion and drowsiness that I interrupted my thoughts about Kakashi and swiftly prepared my bed and instantly slept.

The night was restless. The wind howled and rattled the tent at each gust. Once again I was halfway sleeping and freezing, my teeth chattered and my body trembled. I cursed myself for my sensitivity towards cold temperature and I felt lousy and was struck by headache. I was on the verge of losing my mind! Sleepless nights were the absolute torture in the world! I don't know how long I was going to survive like this, before I collapse. Suddenly I felt a person's presence behind me and no sooner it pulled me closer to itself by lacing its arm around my stomach, so that my back touched a wall of warm muscles. All my muscles became tense and my heart jumped to my throat and I was completely awake.

"You are trembling like a deer."

The words were stuck in my throat, at the sound of Kakashi's voice behind my head. I wanted to move away from him, but my body refused to move, it was enjoying Kakashi's warm back and his arm.

"Ka-ka-ka-Kakashi, wha-what are you doing?" I stammered, reacting nervously and freezing with my teeth chattering.

"I thought about your behaviour of the passed days and realized I wasn't taking proper care of you. You know you should have told me you were freezing and feeling unwell at night; then I wouldn't have pushed you so much."

Listening to this, made the tears well up in my eyes. He did care. It was my paranoia that was telling me Kakashi wasn't caring about me. Then he pulled me even closer so that I felt his head against the back of my head. Oh, how warm he was, a living radiator! His warmth, although he was in his sleeping bag and I in mine, penetrated easily through the layers and spread through my system, sending an exciting tingling sensation. The areas he touched grew hot; it struck me so suddenly how much I longed for his touches and his closeness. I felt his calming breaths against my hair. My body was going a bit crazy of Kakashi's closeness and I was afraid that my feelings would pour out of me, so I grabbed his arm and tried to push it off of me.

"Kakashi, we shouldn't do this - it's not right."

"We aren't doing anything wrong. I'm just keeping you warm and you are keeping me warm, so it's a fair deal."

"But you don't understand...I-

-I'm afraid of your closeness, right? I can give you my full assurance that I won't touch you at all, I'll remain like this." He finished for me, which is actually not what I intended to say, but it was better then nothing.

Kakashi! That isn't the problem! I know you wouldn't touch me, but what about me?! I don't know if I could hold my feelings or myself back any longer.

"Just relax up a bit and try to sleep. We've got a long day tomorrow." He yawned and no later by the calm breath intakes and calm heartbeats he was sleeping.

I stayed awake for some time, but finally was so exhausted that I fell asleep.

The next morning I awoke peacefully and instantly my face encountered the clothed chest of Kakashi. For some odd reason I had changed position, instead of sleeping with my back against his chest I was sleeping with my face against his chest and his arm held me closely to him. As I looked up, I met his covered sleepy face, which looked so innocent and serene that I was tempted to touch it. I raised my hand and pinched a part of his mask and pulled it down gently. His pale face enchanted me so much, I was staring at his uncovered face, observing his facial features and wondered how a person could have such a perfect face. I raised my hand and drove my fingers slowly over his forehead, his temples, his cheeks, his nose, his chin and stopped still underneath his lips. He had such soft skin. Kakashi was soundlessly and deeply sleeping. Then I drove my fingers over his thin lips, feeling the softness and the roughness and his warm breath against my finger. It thrilled me, I wanted to touch him more, but held back since it would be unfair of me to take advantage of him while he's sleeping. After all I wasn't sure if he felt anything for me. Then when I looked back to his face, I was startled to find him staring at me quietly; my fingers still lingered on his lips. He looked at them and back to me, his eye shone with something which made my heart skip a beat and his gaze was very penetrative. Embarrassed of encountering him in such a state, I sunk my gaze and tried to pull my hand away, but he gripped it and pressed his lips against my fingers, while keeping his strong look on me. I was startled of his promptness, even surprised to see him kissing my fingers, feeling uneasy about it I looked away. Not once did he speak, his eyes seemed to be the only thing that was communicating to me, however I couldn't understand it, but he managed to lock my gaze to his. His lips touched my fingers; it burned them, sending a surge of adrenaline in my system. I couldn't believe that such a small thing could drive my heart crazy and stiffen me up. I was craving for his closeness! Then he released my hand and his hand began to caress my face, it was absolutely intoxicating. His fingers felt rough, he managed to caress my forehead, cheeks, nose and chin with such skill that it became more difficult to hold back my feelings. He repeated the same movements as I did and stopped below my lips. His eyes met mine and then he followed his fingers and brushed them over my lips, my breath hitched at the contact, my breath shuddered and became shallow. Kakashi stopped in his movements and looked at me in the eyes. Since I was drunk with desire he took that as a queue; to roll on top of me and capture my lips. I couldn't believe any of it, Kakashi was kissing me, Kakashi was kissing me?! How could that be?! How, why? Overwhelmed by his kissing I laced my arms around his neck, holding him and gradually answering his kissing. All the time in the world stopped, my whole body tingled with excitement and pleasure. It was the first time I ever felt like this, so serene and so happy of life, so happy that he loved me. His kissing became more passionate and intense and he pulled back to get some air. For once I could understand what his eyes meant, it was clouded with desire, passion and longing. A look that only lovers would exchange, a sacred, intimate, breathtaking and addicting look. I was still staring at him with stupefy, unable to believe that it was actually happening, my voice was stuck in my throat and I couldn't breath straight. A tender smile crossed his lips, it was the first time I ever saw him with such affection. Rather abruptly I embraced him, holding him closely to me and all of a sudden I felt he became rigid.

"Sara, what are you doing?" sounded the voice all too cool and surprised than expected.

"Sara, let go off me before you break my bones."

I raised a confused eyebrow; he wouldn't say that in such tender moments, would he? Then somebody shook me. My eyes opened, my sight was blurry, but gradually cleared when I suddenly met the clothed chest of Kakashi. Promptly I was wide awake, my cheek was pressed against his chest and only later I realized I was hugging him tightly. My face turned instantly red. A chuckle rumbled within Kakashi.

"Well whatever you were dreaming, judging by the way you were holding me, it regarded me, right? Would you mind to satisfy my curiosity?"

Losing my voice and hoping the ground could engulf me to cover up this embarrassing moment; I retrieved my arms and did not once look up at Kakashi. Unconsciously my fingers lingered on my lips, how could a dream feel so real that I really felt his lips? How could his touches feel so real, this sensation he created within me be all so real? How could it possibly be only a dream?

"If you aren't going to tell me, maybe lets check it out for ourselves." He said in a mischievous tone and my eyes darted up to him.

His face was inching my face and I was pressing my head to the ground, avoiding his nearing face. I couldn't let him do this to me, not now, not ever, so I took a deep breath and gave him a cold look.

"Whatever you are thinking to achieve, I can tell you already it won't work."

"Oh, yeah, why not?" his face stopped nearing mine, hovering over mine, carrying a surprised yet interested face.

The thought that maybe Kakashi took advantage of me while I was sleeping, disgusted me enormously and another feeling combined into my system like guilt, which resulted me to shove Kakashi aside and dash out of the tent.

A familiar tender and smiling face flashed in front of my eyes, a long forgotten love that has tormented me throughout those years, haunted me to sting my heart with billions of sharp needles. An unbearably strong love that suddenly opened, like an old wound. I felt repulsion and shame of my new feelings. How long has it been four, five years? Has he reappeared to curse me? Is it because I began to love somebody else that those long forgotten feelings are rejecting my new feelings towards another? Why are those reminiscing feelings always intervening with my life? It ruined my life in the passed five years, restricting me from any relationships with men. Kakashi is only an anime character made of pencil strokes and colours, in which I had the liberty to express my suppressed feelings, he was merely a puppet. However it was unexpected that I would land in the Naruto world, be near him and create true and substantial feelings towards him. Were those old feelings warning me that I shouldn't become too dependant of this world, since I might leave it anytime? Was I going to be forced to suppress my feelings once again, keeping myself silent until it was too late? The reality of the situation caused me to weep. My mind was in disorder, I was deeply in trouble, I was going to risk my sanity and break my heart again for an unrequited love. My leftover feelings couldn't be washed away, forgotten or stored away, it resurfaced to plague me and destroy my new feelings towards other men. The first man I utmost and dearest loved wasn't Kakashi, but Steve, who disappeared from my sight and forever out of my life before I could tell him how I felt about him…


	18. Chapter 17

**Heya, again!! I guess all of you are busy with the beginning of School, me I'll start soon -frown-. Anyway wish all of you a nice School week and hope that my fanfiction can brighten your day. Here goes another chapie!! Thanks for the reviews and support!!**

* * *

**CHAPTER SEVENTEEN**

- Assaults at night but with a terrible price -

We continued to our final destination. We entered the Kiri realm and were surprised with load of fog and drizzle. Once again we travelled in utter silence, what happened this morning seemed long forgotten. I could sense in the atmosphere the uneasiness with Kakashi; he must be debating with himself over my strange behaviour this morning. Some times he turned his head, to eye me, since I was behind him and I would divert my gaze, feeling uneasy maybe even guilty about what happened earlier. Suddenly a frosty chill went down my spine and I halted to turn around, alarmingly looking at the source that attracted my attention. I pulled out swiftly my kunai, but it was already too late, a foreign shaped shuriken grazed my side, bringing me to the ground and clutching my bleeding and searing wound. I yelped loudly, attracting the attention of Kakashi who brusquely stopped in his movements and turned to me. Another yelp erupted from me, when another shuriken grazed my shoulder. Kakashi ran back to me and stood in front of me to protect me. I uttered with a restrained and pained voice.

"So I wasn't hallucinating after all."

"What do you mean!" demanded Kakashi sharply, who stood ready with a kunai in his hand watching his surroundings with vigilance.

I chuckled pathetically.

"For a while, I felt somebody following us."

"And you just tell me that NOW!!" he retorted furiously, I knew what mistake I made, I should have warned him.

"Why the hell haven't you said a thing? That would explain your behaviour!"

All of a sudden I spotted something and instinctively threw a kunai just over Kakashi's shoulder, which planted itself against a tree. Kakashi was about to scold me about that when we saw a figure gradually coming into view where the kunai was planted against. The kunai caught him at his neck, which bled profusely. Judging by his dark shinobi attire and appearance, he clearly came from the realm of Kiri. His face pulled an aggressive and pained expression with the blood trickling down his mouth.

"It's a camouflage jutsu." Muttered Kakashi, without breaking eye contact to the shinobi on the tree.

The Kiri Nin's eyes darkened and he fell to ground with a thud, not moving anymore. We stared at the Nin, prepared if he'd attack us; Kakashi walked over carefully and checked on the Nin.

"He's dead."

Then he looked at me with a sharp and suspicious eye.

"How were you able to get him like that? It's impossible for a human eye to perceive a camouflage jutsu."

He got up and walked over to me.

"I don't know, I think it was my instincts."

Kakashi once again gave me that cold calculative look, but then kneeled down to me to check on me.

"Are you okay?"

I nodded, clenching my teeth at the pain. His hand gripped my hand and removed it from my wounded side. Then he grabbed my shirt and was about to pull it up, when I promptly grabbed his hand.

"What the hell are you doing?" I exclaimed

I was met by his lazy and unconcerned look.

"I'm checking on your injuries."

"I can do that myself."

"You have no idea how to treat them and if they aren't tended by somebody who's got experience you'll die." He pronounced "die" so convincingly that I swallowed uncomfortably.

"Take off your shirt."

"Are you nuts?!"

"No, I can only have a better look at your injuries if you have your shirt off."

"But it's damn cold! Could we go to an inn or something?"

Kakashi was about to comment back, but gave a thought over it.

"There should be an inn nearby, maybe an hour away."

I nodded with relief that was better than taking off my shirt out here. He helped me up and placed his back at my disposal. I climbed on it and he carried me in quick paces through the dense and foggy forest. While being rattled around on his back, I felt sleepy and light headed and so I rested my forehead against his shoulder.

"Don't fall asleep, Sara!" urged Kakashi sharply.

"I know, but I feel so light headed." I spoke weakly

"Talk to me about something, it'll help to keep you awake."

It took me a moment to speak, because I didn't know about what we could talk about and also I felt a bit dizzy.

"My healing abilities don't seem to function."

"Must be because you are very exhausted and eating little."

"Well the food is gross! Eating ramen practically three times a day is disgusting!"

"You sure are picky."

"Am not! I just cannot digest eating ramen, three times a day. Doesn't Naruto do that?"

"Yep, although I've countless times tried to encourage him to eat other healthier things such as fruits, he wouldn't eat it."

"Doesn't he drink milk always?"

"By the way, I haven't mentioned once Naruto loving ramen and milk."

Realizing what I just said, I quickly mentioned with a stammered voice, to cover up my mistake.

"Naruto told me."

"Ah, okay."

He paused for a moment, to overcome some boulders and cross a running river.

"Some times I really doubt you are a foreigner, the way you behave in Konoha and how you treat the people, is like you knew them for so long and I felt it strongly when we met the first time."

I turned away my head, hiding a nervous face, this is bad! Of course I know Konoha and the shinobi world, because I watch Naruto! I bit my lip, remaining quiet will create suspicion I must come up with a lie.

"Well, you know, I'm very open to strangers and have great interest in shinobis…"

I paused there, wondering if I should continue, I should otherwise it would be suspicious and telling the half-truth wouldn't hurt. I leaned forward, resting my chin on his shoulder.

"Do you wanna know why I was reacting very familiar towards you?"

Kakashi didn't show any objection, so I continued.

"Because I admire you."

My face turned red and anxiety overcame me, oh my God, it was nearly a confession!? I quickly recapitulated, since Kakashi he was equally startled.

"Uhm, what I meant, in my country you are very popular and well respected, everybody dreams about meeting you personally and I am the fortunate one." I gave a satisfied and proud chuckle.

"How come do you admire me? What did I do great?" he questioned me suddenly in a bitter tone, showing me otherwise.

It was the first time I heard him speak with bitterness, although I couldn't see his face, but I knew he would be looking remorseful or guilty.

"You are a patriot to your village and dutiful and saved many lives."

An ironic chuckle came from him.

"How would you know?"

"Aren't you scars the proof of it?"

There was an abrupt pause. I decided to change the topic quickly, since it was affecting Kakashi and causing tension.

"Kakashi…"

"Hmm?"

"If you had a mission, for example to kill a dangerous shinobi who broke out of prison and suddenly in a delicate and complex situation one of your team mates was severally injured, what would you do? Help him out or abandon him to finish the mission?"

"I would abandon my team mate to finish off the prisoner."

"Ah, I see…"

"I know it sounds cold, but if you were born a shinobi and were an Anbu you would understand what I mean."

"I would risk my shinobi career or life to save my team mates and I won't let them die." I declared in a firm and determined tone, which made Kakashi surprised that he eyed me.

Kakashi then adjusted his eyes back in front of him and sighed.

"I knew a man, who said the same thing. He was a man of courage and humility, but a fearsome opponent. As a kid I admired him. Then all of a sudden, when he returned from a mission, the people of Konoha began considering him as trash, because he rescued his team mates instead of accomplishing the mission. As a result, couple of days later he committed suicide."

I was not surprised to hear that, despite that it was shocking and surprising that he came up with this, since I did know the story, his story.

"Wasn't it your father?"

His pace suddenly slowed down and I bit my lip, to hold myself back from swearing. Shit, I shouldn't have said it, I shouldn't have, shouldn't have said it!

"Why is that when I tell you something about me, you seem to know everything?"

"I do not know anything about you! How could I, when you don't reveal anything to me? I am sensitive to detect things and I'm sorry to say the way you described that man with some signs of admiration, it damn sounded like you were talking about your dad!"

Again Kakashi did not fight back and slowly I was suspecting something.

"Anyway I'm curious, tell me about your home, your country?" he briskly asked me calmly, picking up his pace.

I bit my lip, what should I say? The truth? NEVER!

"First of all you have to know that I don't come from any shinobi related country and I live on a separate continent, where practically everybody ignores the existence of shinobis."

"Really, is that so?"

"Yea. Children are born and raised to be educated in order to get stable jobs later on and in turn to be part of the society."

"Same thing with Konoha. Do you have a leader that leads your country?"

"No we don't, we have several."

"Several?"

"Yea, since my country is made up of various districts, it needs leaders responsible for each region and by the end they have an assembly to create rules or improve the well fare of the country and its people. You call that social equality."

"Sounds pretty complicated to me, I think its better one leader to govern a country."

"Well of course Konoha is tiny in comparison to my country! Anyway I hate talking about politics, but we do have one leader of the country, but he cannot execute any of his power without the regional leaders."

"Oh, sure is complicated but interesting at the same time. Anyway tell me about your home?"

Warmth overcame me, the sound of home and a smile appeared on my face.

"I live in a town surrounded by nature; it's a beautiful place which I consider home. The people are sometimes very annoying, but other times they come to bring you fresh fruits from their cultivation and have a coffee with you. They start talking about the gossips or great news or their troubles."

"What about your friends?"

I chuckled ironically and my smile was replaced by bitterness.

"Friends? Don't have any."

"That's sad to hear." Mentioned Kakashi calmly.

"Why?"

"You know, friends are more precious than you can ever imagine."

"Ha! It's strange to hear that from you Kakashi, you are practically the opposite."

"I know, but I experienced it. I felt accepted and cared about, I knew they were behind me and supporting me, you could say finally I received some warmth."

It made me sad to hear this, his regretful and melancholic voice, which touched me to tears. Why did I ever think Kakashi was cold hearted? He suffered so much and yet he keeps on going without turning back. He's so strong and kind-hearted.

"That's why my family are like my friends." I said after a moment of pause, "I consider them most precious. At least I have a guarantee that they are behind me, cheering me on, supporting me, caring for me and loving me. My siblings are my best friends; we go out with each other, talk about gossips and have fun."

"Your life doesn't seem that sad, as I thought it would be. If you spoke so affectionately about your family, than why were you desperate to kill yourself?"

There was moment of silence. He was right, why did I plan to kill myself if I had my family caring for me?

"I was foolish and selfish at that time. I've got so much to do still! What's sure I want to be a great grandma to my grandchildren, ha ha."

Kakashi chuckled with me.

"Anyway what's with you and having kids? I mean you are only 18, 19 years of age?"

I chuckled.

"It's natural for women to behave like this, taking care of a baby created by the love of the couple, is beautiful." I marvelled.

"I think you are the only woman in your age group in Konoha to think like that - babbling this mushy stuff."

"It's not mushy, it's normal! It's the most exciting part of life."

"In other words, you can't wait to have sex."

I groaned and rolled my eyes with irritation, what an idiot!

"You know you are such a lecher, you are just obsessed by that."

"Like every healthy man."

I made a disgusted face, he sure is crazy about that stuff and it's discomforting and bizarre.

"You know, you are very filthy minded for a teacher - did you maybe use your lechery against your students perhaps?"

"How did you know?"

My jaw went slack, horror and disgust crawled up my skin. Eww! I turned aside, clutching my cheeks; he's anything but kind hearted! Now the thought that he's carrying me, made me rigid.

"I was kidding I did not, however out of the pupils I had, you are the only one that kissed me."

My face turned brick red.

"Let me remind you that you kissed me at that time, okay!"

He chuckled, I could tell he wanted to tease me more on this topic, but didn't bother doing so, which was a relief.

"One thing what I don't get is why you react so nervous at the word "sex"?"

"Well, duh! It's a topic that I don't like talking about in the open!"

"Or is that because you never did it?" His uncovered eye eyeing me with a glint of mischief.

My face took an extremely dark shade and I looked away and huffed.

"That means you are a v-mm!" I slapped my hand over his mouth.

"Shut up you! Judging by your behaviour, you did it billions of times!" I retorted and pulled away my hand.

"Are you jealous?"

"Of what?"

"That you weren't one of my preys?"

"No. Since I would be traumatized for a life time and such men disgust me."

"Ouch, that was cold," He muttered.

"No wonder, with that attitude of yours, you never had a boyfriend." He added and an angry face formed on my face.

"You've got no idea why, so you better stop judging me falsely! Agh!" I clutched my side and rested my head against his shoulder.

"Sara, are you okay?"

"It hurts, are we there soon?" I mumbled painfully.

"In 15 minutes we should be there, just hold on a bit longer."

"Easier said than done." I grunted, once again I felt queasy and dizzy.

My grip around his neck began to loosen up, I felt so weak and drained of energy.

"Sara! Hold on, whatever you do, don't fall asleep!"

"I'm trying, just hurry up!"

Finally Kakashi's paces slowed down and he jogged somewhere and since I was in a daze I couldn't catch what was happening, only when Kakashi unloaded me to the floor I realized we were in a room. It was an old worn out, traditional room, equipped with a built in cupboard behind a papered sliding door. There were those papered sliding doors supported with wooden frames. The floor was soft and smooth, which felt nice. Kakashi closed the sliding door and pulled on a string, which illuminated the room. It was a small room, enough for two people to sleep and there was a window, which was closed up and a table in the middle of the room. He set his bag down and pulled out the first aid kit.

"Start taking off your shirt."

I only took off the jacket I wore over it, but hesitated to take off my shirt. What discouraged me greatly was Kakashi looking at me, expecting me to take it off soon. I covered myself defensively and shook my head.

"I cannot, I cannot! Not in front of a man!" Or more precisely not in front of him!

"Sara, if you continue like this, your stubbornness will be the cause of your death - so do not make me take it off for you!"

I shook my head defensively and backed away from him. Kakashi sighed and shook his head and with one movement, he grabbed a hold of my shirt and I was pressing his hand down to stop him from pulling it off.

"No, no, no, no! Kakashi, stop it!"

"YOU, stop it, Sara! If you don't want to die of an infection, you've got to take off your shirt, now!"

"That is not the problem; it's you who's the problem! Do you seriously think I would take off my shirt in front of you! A man?!" I exclaimed and he still was trying to pull it off.

"Sara, you've got to trust me on this! The shurikens could contain some poison which is hindering your wounds to heal and your healing ability to function and if you continue being stubborn, it might be too late to save you!" he instructed me sharply but then I collapsed on my knees, clutching my sides.

He came down to me and rested his hand on my head.

"I told you. I promise I won't look, I will only tend to your injuries." His reassurance, comforted me, but still I was hesitating.

After some thinking I turned my back on him and pulled off my shirt, I felt his gaze burning holes through my back.

"You can use your shirt to cover up your chest." He suggested, which I of course automatically did and turned to him with a red face and keeping my eyes away from his eyes.

"I'll start with the injury on your side." He mentioned and moved to my left.

"Lay down on your right side."

I complied and lay down, so that my left side was exposed to him and I kept the shirt pressed defensively against my chest, covering myself well, feeling rigid and strained. Then Kakashi's hand rested on my side near to the injury, which made my heart skip a few beats.

"Relax, Sara, how am I supposed to treat your injury if you behave like an animal that's going to be butchered? You have my word that I will only concentrate on your wounds." He reassured me with some amusement in his tone.

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes to calm myself down, but soon as his hands touched my bare skin, my system went mad! I had to bit my lips, to contain myself. Then he touched my injury and I gave a sharp gasp.

"Sorry."

I heard him dipping a cloth in a bowl and he placed it on my injury and pain-stricken I sat up briskly, yelping in pain.

"Dammit! It hurts!"

"Sorry, but before I disinfect or bandage the whole, I'll clean out the wound first."

Realizing that I was looking at him, I quickly diverted my gaze and lay down again. Kakashi restarted cleaning my wound, over my painful yelps. I clutched my shirt tightly and bit my lip, to stop me from yelping, but it was impossible. It hurt so much that I had tears rolling down my cheeks. I think it was my first serious wound ever. Despite that it was painful, Kakashi made great effort to be gentle and careful while he was dabbing my wound. My mind was filling itself with smutty thoughts when his hands touched my skin. From time to time I had this surge of feelings urging me to kiss him, but I was lucky enough that the pain of my wound was killing off those thoughts. Finally he stopped his actions.

"Sara, I need you to stand up straight, so I can put the bandages on."

I complied and stood up straight. I felt a bit relaxed now, but when he suddenly began wrapping the roll of bandage around my abdomen in a half embrace, I lost my breath. His chest brushed against my hands which covered my chest with the shirt. My face was surely blazing red and my heart was pounding against my ribs. The bandaging went very slowly, or was my mind playing tricks on me? His hands grazed my skin, tormenting my self-control and what worsened everything was Kakashi's calm breath against my shoulder. Curiosity overtook me and for the first time I looked up, Kakashi was staring over my shoulders, focused on bandaging me and from time to time he looked to my injury to check if it was properly covered. My eyes stuck to his face, this urge to kiss him grew and grew stronger. No later he finished bandaging me he encountered my stare, which he met with some confusion, but the confusion vanished soon as he stared back into my eyes. We exchanged some magical moment between each other. Then he rested his hand on my head and patted it.

"You did not do too bad, next is your shoulder." He said, interrupting too suddenly the silence and he made me sit.

He sat in front of me with the first aid kit and dabbed with the hot cloth on my wounded shoulder, which I replied with painful gasps. My gaze non-stop wandered back to Kakashi's face, but when he glanced at me I looked away with a blushing face.

"I'll push that strap aside, if you don't mind." He supplied and brushed gently with his fingers my bra strap down my shoulder.

My breath hitched and I shut my eyes, my heart was going to burst out of my chest any minute now if he continues touching me. All of a sudden, Steve's face flashed in front of my eyes, causing me to shake off Kakashi's hand.

"What's wrong?"

"Why are you touching me like this? Is it part of your play?"

"Sara, what are you talking about?"

"Don't play dumb with me Kakashi! Lately you've been only very touchy around me and no one else, why is that?"

There was a brief moment of silence, where he just stared at me blankly, but then he recapitulated with a cheerful attitude.

"You must be tiered, if you're talking like this, don't worry I'll finish this up quickly."

He got up and walked around me to treat my shoulder from behind. This time there was an icy silence between us, where none dared to speak. It's true; Kakashi has only being touchy around me and nobody else, what did this mean? Did he maybe feel something for me? Or was it a simple act of friendship? Anyway if he felt something for me, he would have ambushed me already some time ago when he was putting the bandage on me or other times. So it was impossible that he did feel something.

In no time he was finished bandaging my shoulder, he abruptly gathered his shower necessities and for some reason acted a bit distracted and nervous.

"I'll go take a shower and be back in ten minutes, so you've got time to change." He said briefly and left hurriedly out of the room. I just watch him disappear with my head titled in confusion.

Actually it turned out that he was gone for an hour. In the meantime I changed into my pyjamas and prepared our beds and sat on mine, staring at the door, wondering when he was going to return. Finally the sliding door opened, revealing Kakashi wearing a plain olive coloured kinagashi (male kimono) with his pale chest showing through the low cut. I lost my breath. Kakashi looked absolutely sexy in that! Oh my God! The combination of his damp and hanging silver hair plus his chest showing through the low cut - made him look like a playboy from those Shojo Mangas.

"What are you staring at? I know you think I look hot, but I would prefer a compliment than a staring parade."

I crossed my arms over my chest and huffed to hide my blush and my embarrassment.

"I only stared at you, because it was the first time I saw you in, that. And don't get your hopes high because I've seen hotter guys."

"Aha." He dropped himself on his tatami nearby; our beds were separated from each other by the table.

"You know you could have pushed the table in the back and put our beds closer."

"And why is that? We have been sleeping far away from each other throughout the mission."

Then he lay back and tossed to my direction revealing a puppy face with sparkling eyes, his hand brushed over his bed.

"Because I feel so lonely." He muttered with pouting lips.

I rolled my eyes and turned my back on him, covering myself with my blanket. What an idiot! Like I would sleep next to that pervert! I cuddled into my blankets with pleasure. Kakashi turned off the light and I assume he went back to his bed. I was into a bad surprise, when I was suddenly pushed against the wall and feeling his whole figure joining me underneath the blankets! I turned around and protested to the grinning idiot.

"Kakashi, get out of my bed! I'm exhausted and I want to get a good night sleep!"

"You can and I won't disturb you." He said innocently with a grin, ignoring the previous thing I said.

I used my legs to push him out of my bed, but he kept crawling back in and now I noticed he was still wearing that kimono of his.

"I hope you are wearing something underneath that, because if you aren't I'm going to kill you!"

"I'm wearing my boxers."

"…Get out of my bed, before I use real violence against you!!"

Kakashi raised his eye brow.

"Oh, really? Go ahead, make me!" He encouraged me provocatively.

I had to do something - anything to get him off guard. Since he was just in front of me smiling stupidly, believing he was going to win for sure. A smirk flashed over my face, when an idea struck me. I moved closer to him and placed my hand on his chest and he looked at me with surprise backed up by distrust. I moved my hand on the low cut, driving my hand skilfully over his warm and bare chest. I pressed my body against his, he stared at me wide eyed, clearly confused about my strange behaviour. I raised my face to his ear, to whisper in his ear in a seductive tone.

"You are very sexy Kakashi and you make me hot."

I pulled back to meet the bewildered face of Kakashi, who stared at me with his wide eyes. Although it was dark, I could tell there was a dark shade spreading over Kakashi's face. I had to swallow a laugh, but I kept my seductive behaviour and approached my face to his. All of a sudden, I found myself underneath Kakashi who pressed my wrists against the tatami.

"I should warn you before you do this again, it's very bad if you try to seduce me, because how can you guarantee that I'll stop?"

My heart skipped several beats, at the piercing gaze and strong statement he made. My feelings flooded my entire system so that I lost control of myself; I broke free from his grip and boldly rolled him over so that he was underneath me. Daringly I captured his lips and kissed him passionately. Kakashi's lips remained immobile, he was too startled to react and when I pulled back to get some air, I looked at him breathlessly. His startled face showed me the reality and I felt the guilt and shame swept over me. I pulled away completely and sat with my gaze diverted. Kakashi slowly sat up and before I could apologize he captured my lips so feverishly. It was my turn to be startled, he dragged me back down on top of him and he flipped me over so that I was underneath him. He pulled away to stare at me without saying a word, he was breathless and his heart was also pounding so hard as mine. It seemed like Kakashi was struggling with something, since I felt he was staring right through me. I raised my head to meet his lips and kiss him gently, but he seemed wanting to pull away any moment since he was trying to turn his head away. Then I quickly wrapped my arms behind his neck and pulled him down to me, to kiss him further.

"Sara…We…Must…Stop…We cannot…"

I pulled away and told him clearly.

"I don't care! I only want you!"

Kakashi's eyes widened and everything else stopped as well. However after digesting this he immediately captured my lips and kissed me with intoxicating passion that my hands began gripping his silver hair. We kissed under heated passion until the late night.

The next morning I woke up and sat up rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, I looked around me still in a daze. Kakashi's bed was already folded up and the sun shone through the filthy window, illuminating the room displaying its murkiness, dusty and untidiness. I couldn't remember anything what happened yesterday, only that I was attacked, brought here and that Kakashi was fixing up my wounds. After that was unclear. My wounds started twitching painfully and I pushed my sleeve down to check on my shoulder. I undid the bandage and saw the wound regenerating quickly and I yelped in startle at how inhuman it looked like. I jumped up and undid the bandage wrapped around my stomach, as the roll of bandages fell to the floor soundlessly I watched with horror at my wound, disappearing like it was simply wiped off with a cloth. How could such a deep wound regenerate in such a short amount of time? Even the healing process doubled.

"So they're already fully healed?" assumed Kakashi and I looked at Kakashi, who just came in with a cheerful face.

His hair was damp again and he was dressed up in his Jounin attire.

"I suggest you take a dip into the hot bath, it's really refreshing." He proposed and for some reasons he was looking at me in an unusual way, it felt more intimate.

I looked back at him with confusion and then shrugged to myself and grabbed my things and left the room.

Kakashi was right; relaxing in the hot bath was so refreshing! The water was milky coloured and it felt so awesome against my skin. I stayed in there for 30 minutes and then got out, to put on a Yukata, which the inn placed at the guests' disposal. I put one on, but was then helped by an elderly woman who noticed that I was unfamiliar with Yukata's. With my hair cascading down on one side of my shoulder, I headed back to my room. I found Kakashi sitting at the table, picking with his chopsticks some of the fish on the plate. He stopped in his movements, to stare at me.

"You look nice." He complimented me, sounding a bit nervous himself.

I raised a suspicious eye brow.

"Kakashi, you know lately you have been acting equally nervous around me, tell me what's up?"

Kakashi stuffed the remainder of his food in his mouth and took a big gulp of sake, before standing up, merely grinning at me and patting my head in a brotherly way.

"Go and eat something, you'll need a lot of energy for today."

He walked to the sliding door and before leaving the room entirely, he added in his usual cool tone

"In the meantime I'll go out a bit and when I return I'll discuss in detail about our mission."

Without looking back at me or sounding cheerful, he left quietly. I stared at the sliding door with my head tilted to the side, what was wrong with him? Why was he so warm, yet so distant at the same time? He didn't sound mean or anything, but I felt he was repressing something and judging by his absence of eye contact and evasive behaviour, it was something big. I sat down at the table. I contemplated over my food, which Kakashi and had laid out nicely for me. Indeed Kakashi did show - after the tent incident - some stiff and evasive behaviour, but why all so suddenly? When we already encountered many such moments? Maybe from his perspective he didn't realize his behaviour. Did I maybe disturb him? Creating something which he's foreign to? Then a realization, popped up in my head and I abruptly jumped up.

"Bull shit! Impossible that he'd develop any feelings towards me! Only an idiot with no brains would fall for me! Plus, he's 27 years old! He's my teacher, a friend and a brother…" I mumbled with the last words sounding bitter.

I sat back down at the table and began eating the breakfast. Why the hell was I getting all depressed? It would be anyway bad for him and me to be lovers, not only bad but weird and disturbing. I mean, dating a guy whose nearly ten years your senior, Sheesh, only an idiot would do that! You'll now by the end that he'll leave you for another girl, anyway so why bother dating a guy that's so old? With a sigh, I dropped my head on the table. Even if I thought like that, it didn't make me feel any better. My life in Konoha was going to be miserable and painful and nothing was proving me the opposite. Then…What is my purpose here? To fall in love with Kakashi and get my heart broken by disappointment or to get stronger? This question surely never will be answered, not until I leave Konoha, once and for all. That idea stung my heart, leaving Konoha behind and forgetting about it. Living a new life with a man that I won't love as much as Kakashi and what keeps adding to the load is that my feelings are growing stronger. I don't know, but somehow I felt that we came much closer to each other in the passed few days of the mission, not that the tent incident was the last kick to bring us closer, but generally we are inevitably getting closer.

"Woa, amazing. I'm only gone for 30 minutes and you barely touched your food." Erupted Kakashi's voice, briskly startling me which brought me to knock over my entire food all over the floor.


	19. Chapter 18

**Heya guys!! Sorry for the long wait!! I started School and had lot of BS in my mind regarding School!!** **I hope this story can please you all the way!!And thanks to all reviews, they are always so encouraging!!**

* * *

**CHAPTER EIGHTEEN**

- The truth about the mission and the rejection -

After cleaning up the mess, which was a hell of a job – we gathered our things and we sat across of each other at the small table. From time to time, Kakashi eyed the sliding door vigilantly and his eyes met back with mine, but his eye contact with me was very brief. Questioning straight away about his behaviour, might result to an unwanted argument, which I preferred to avoid by all means necessary. There was a gentle knock and the door slid open, revealing a middle aged woman with a tray filled with food and drinks. She politely bowed and apologized the interruption and placed the tray on the table and took the other tray with the dirty dishes, which I handed to her and she retreated with a smile. As her footsteps became fainter, Kakashi waited and then started taking a bowl for himself and serving himself on the food. I did the same and there he began to speak.

"I have to apologize if I seemed very cold to you on the way here. It's because I've experienced several times that vital mission information was leaked to the enemy, when it was carelessly spoken about it, outside. We have been taught not to trust anybody, even one's team mates and especially in an insecure area, like the forest for instance. As you witnessed the Kiri Nin was following us for some time. Even around here I don't feel safe enough to discuss about our mission, but I don't have any choice…"

He leaned over the table, so that he could talk to me more quietly.

"You see, since you fainted the last time back in Konoha, I had no opportunity to inform you about the mission. The truth is, this mission is hazardous and I'm hesitating whether or not you should participate in this."

"What do you mean?" I retorted, annoyed that he doubted my fighting skills.

Kakashi sighed at me and looked at me straight in the eye.

"We have to disclaim a sacred scroll that was stolen from Konoha, during the war."

"Ah, you mean the shinobi war, between all the villages?"

Kakashi stopped short, to eye me sharply, but then softened his expressions and merely nodded.

"Yea, during that time, a clan from Kiri managed to steal a scared scroll from Konoha, which contained imaginable power to destroy if wanted, an entire village."

I gaped at him in horror.

"But if that's the case, then why haven't they destroyed any village yet?"

"As far as I was informed, they haven't managed to open the scroll entirely in order to unleash its true power. And what makes the situation more problematic for us, is that a certain clan is affected by this. You have to be aware that one of the Hokages sealed an imaginable power within it in, in order to protect our village…"

-Is it a demon?" I spluttered, interrupting him brashly.

Kakashi's grey eye brow, raised in astonishment.

"That's a rather bold assumption and you might be not in the wrong, however unfortunately its content is unknown to us, even to Tsunade Sama. Nevertheless there are rumours about its contents and its rather negative than positive. In other words if it lands in the wrong hands, it could cause another war. Nonetheless you have to understand from the perspective of Kiri that entering a war may in fact improve the morals of their people and through winning land, they could improve their economy. As Kiri has talented shinobis and easily can create alliances with other shinobi nations which dislikes us, we would inevitably stumble into a war and I believe it's the last thing that every shinobi wants; a repetition of history."

"So if we fail in our mission we'll endanger the peace?"

Kakashi nodded gravely and I leaned back heavily and raised my head to stare at the ceiling and take a deep breath.

"I hate this, that's much to ask for, having whole Konoha rely on us to secure peace. Now I can understand what pressure super heroes are undergoing. My God I'm getting a head ache at the thought of it."

I know Kakashi was giving me a confused look, of course he doesn't know what super heroes are, so why bother telling him anyway?

"So our mission is to steal that scroll?" I wondered

"No and…That is why I thought you shouldn't be part of this mission."

"And why is that?" I protested and Kakashi just sighed.

"I don't how you'll bear this and you have proven yourself at our fight to be, well, unsuitable."

I jumped up and retorted with frustration.

"Get to the point Kakashi! Simple as that - I'm weak - that's all!"

Before Kakashi could answer, I argued on,

"And why would I be "unsuitable"? You know damn well that I am strong!"

"I don't doubt your physical strength, but more so your emotional strength."

I groaned.

"Look, Kakashi why not first tell me who the hell those idiots are! A little background information, please! Then you can tell me what our mission is!"

Kakashi instinctively and promptly dragged me down to the table and giving me a stern look.

"Would you mind to keep your voice down? Do you seriously want to give off our location and get us killed before we accomplish our mission?" he hushed sharply, still gripping my arm tensely.

"You have to learn to be patient. If you are desperate to finish off that mission, then we must do it with finesse."

"Can you get to the point, please?"

Kakashi sighed once more at my impatience and restarted in a grave tone.

"The clan which stole this scroll is called the Fuhei clan. It has been for generations the top shinobi clan of Kiri. From Konoha's point of view they were irrelevant and meaningless due to their lack of power and popularity; however given that they have this scroll in possession since the shinobi war, their powers doubled or even tripled! Most importantly they are ignorant how hazardous it is to come in contact with that power, only a stronger bearer may contain this power and prevent its destructive power and side effects."

"What kind of side effects?"

Kakashi looked at me straight in the eye.

"Death."

"What?!" I spluttered with horror

"Yea, death, especially to those who are weak, who cannot bear the power."

"How do they get this power? I mean I know it originally comes from the scroll, but how do they absorb it?"

"Since the scroll's seal is cracked, the power leaks out and by a touch, it goes into the system and it grows on feeding from the chakara of the person. It gets stronger and stronger, until either the power is out of control and kills the body or the bearer's body is fully able to contain and control it. In one way or another it would explain why the clan has decreased in members, since the victims are mostly newly born babies."

"This is horrendous! Transferring this monstrous power to innocent babies!"

"Also in the past decade in order to keep the Fuhei bloodline clean, they intermarried and so…They are a bit backward, I mean some of them."

"Ewww!? They kill their babies and then commit incest?! How gross can it get?"

"I don't know why you overreact like this, but it's normal for clans to intermarry their distant cousins in order to preserve their bloodline from impurity."

"Still, it's disgusting! I would rather kill myself than marrying one of my brothers or cousins! No wonder, many clans have retarded people and many incurable diseases! They are as lecherous as animals!"

Kakashi started laughing; it was the first time I saw him seriously laugh. Otherwise it would be that annoying and ridiculous chuckle of his. After getting a grip of himself, he said with amusement.

"Sometimes I'm really curious about where you get this mentality from."

"Well, duh, I studied about the human body, genetics and it's also a common fact. You cannot have a relationship with a relative of yours who has a copy of your DNA; the kids will get all messed up. The very thought of it makes me wanna puke!"

When I met Kakashi's interested face, my heart leaped. Did he have to look at me like this? So I looked away. I was sure he was going to tease me about my behaviour or this topic. However I was wrong, he simply continued in his serious tone.

"Coming to the essential point. The predecessor, who found the scroll and killed half of the family through this contamination, has an heir, called Ronen. He was the only one who successfully absorbed part of the power and is by so far the strongest in whole Kiri."

Kakashi then leaned over the table and lowered his voice.

"Although Konoha's relations to Kiri are not always on the good terms – the cry for help personally came from the Mizukage."

"No way! So Kiri is asking from Konoha to do the dirty job. Sheesh, can't she not do it by herself?"

"I don't know the reasons either, but most likely is because we are skilful."

I looked at him unconvinced and grumbled.

"Clearly there is something fishy behind this."

"It's not for you to judge! We are the tools to accomplish this mission, nothing more! Doubts, hesitations or emotions are a hindrance." He corrected me firmly and I was forced to agree with him at a nod.

Showing some rebellious attitude will worsen everything, anyway, so better keep my mouth shut.

"So how old is the heir?" I asked calmly

"19 or 20."

"So our mission is to steal the scroll and bring it back to Konoha?" I asked with uncertainty and Kakashi just nodded sternly.

"When is the dead line?"

"In a month."

"A month?! Why that long? Stealing a scroll can be done in a day or two!"

"It'll take longer than expected, you'll see."

"What do you mean by this, Kakashi?" I asked him, giving him a sharp insisting eye.

Kakashi merely answered back with simplicity, keeping his impassive composure.

"Stealing such an important scroll may take longer than expected, especially if it's heavily guarded."

I looked at him, titling my head from side to side, trying to decipher his answer. Odd enough I felt that he was hiding something from me, regarding this mission. I crossed my arms over my chest and looked at him straight in the face.

"What are you hiding Kakashi?"

"What?"

"What are you hiding from me? I can tell you aren't telling me everything."

Kakashi gave me a confused look and answered simply.

"What are you talking about? I've told you everything about the mission, what more do you want?"

I must've pricked a weak nerve, because Kakashi was getting a bit annoyed about my questions.

"Why are you getting all tense about?"

"I am not."

Then he got up rather brusquely and was about to leave, not until I grabbed him by his wrist. His response was stunning. He was about to comment back, but his voice died away and he just looked at my hand gripping his wrist and back to me. Once again I saw this glint in his eyes, like what I saw this morning only now he looked at me with mixed feelings.

"What's wrong Kakashi?" I asked him gently, looking at him with concern.

For some reason my behaviour surprised him so much, that after a moment of staring at me, he brushed off my hand from his wrist and turned away from me heaving a sigh. Although I was looking at his back, he looked so delicate, like he was carrying a burden. Sympathy overcame me and the last thing I ever wanted to see, is Kakashi suffering. I got up and hoped by resting my hand on his shoulder it would comfort, however as I mad the slightest contact to his shoulder he shook it off abruptly and turned to me.

"Will you please stop touching me!" he snapped and I looked at him utterly bewildered and obviously Kakashi could read it in my face.

It was the first time to see him react so differently and so defensively. As a consequence it only kept on pecking on my concern.

"Kakashi, what's going on? Are you feeling unwell?" I questioned further with my concern increasing at every word and getting a hold of his forearms.

All too suddenly he pinned my wrists roughly against the wall and he appeared desperate.

"Will you cut it out being all, like this? It's annoying! You've got no idea, how difficult -" he swallowed the last bit in his desperate outburst and diverted his face from me, to reveal an infuriated face.

"Will you quit distracting me, already?"

He released me and stormed out of the room. With my heart beating fast and panting, I stared at the door in great confusion. What was he trying to say?

I don't know how it wound up like this in the first place, but we didn't speak to each other for 4 whole days! Even Kakashi, decided to sleep somewhere else. The worst thing was I didn't understand why he was giving me the silent treatment. As far as I remember I didn't hurt him, he only got really mad when I was showing some concern four days ago. For some reason I felt he was indirectly blaming me for the cause of his trouble. The more I tried to find out the reason for his cold behaviour, the more frustrated I got and finally on the fifth day, he came into my room, fully packed and prepared to leave.

"Get ready, we need to leave."

"Why? What happened?"

"Just do as you're told! Questions come later!"

He left the room, sliding the door forcefully shut. I was forced to comply without arguing. This guy, why was he such in a rotten mood? What have I done? Nothing of course! I packed up my stuff quickly and left the room. I walked along the corridor of occupied rooms and descended the stairs and met Kakashi leaning against the doorway of the inn, busy reading his orange book. As my presence approached his, he snapped his book shut and led the way out of the inn. I realized the inn was on the outskirts of the capital of this country. As we distanced ourselves from the inn and we walked on a rough pebbled path, along the rice fields. Kakashi cleared his voice, breaking the icy silence that roamed during the four days.

"As you may have noticed we haven't reached the actual village of Kiri. So in order to get in unnoticed, we must disguise ourselves and remove any evidence that appears to be foreign to them."

"I thought the Mizukage has granted us free entry."

"Not quite, you see, we have to get this mission done without getting noticed, which I doubt… Anyway I've sent a message to the Mizukage, warning him of our arrival. So it shouldn't be a problem to infiltrate."

After that reply we walked in silence, only the scrunching and scrapping of our sandals over the pebbled path was filling the silence.

"Have you thought about a plan?"

"For what?"

"For our mission."

"Indeed I have, but I prefer not talking about it in an unsecured area. Ah. This place is suitable to transform ourselves."

I followed him to the woods and nearby was a cave. We went in and already with his palms joined, he transformed himself. I was confronted with a stranger, not resembling Kakashi the slightest. He had pitch black hair, dark orbs with a cold piercing gaze and had basically similar body structure. It erased his typical lousy and lazy allure off of him. It was scary he looked tidier than usual, even his hair was shorter and Kakashi was barely recognisable. He resembled Sai somehow, except he was much more handsome than any shinobi I've seen so far in this anime! Also his attires were matching the Kiri style, it was more sombre and casual, not typically a shinobi attire. I just stared at him agape at his full transformation. He was damn handsome! Even his scar and Sharingan eye was gone. It looked so freaky even his face was uncovered. His face showed his cool and mysteriously handsome features. He looked at me, expecting me to do the same. I shrugged.

"I don't know how the women look like!"

Kakashi rolled his eyes with annoyance.

"Remember this woman at the reception?"

"Yea and what's with her?"

"Transform into her and add some changes."

I joined my palms and in a puff of smoke, a woman with silky and curly jet black hair appeared. She appeared physically much mature than I, her shapes and graceful allure turned her to a goddess of beauty. She wore a plain black kimono, tied in a careful fashion, toning with her beauty. Her wave of curly hair fell down her back. Her hands were slender and her nails beautifully made. It was hard to believe that this woman has become me. Even my lips were cherry red. Kakashi whistled through his teeth in interest.

"Not bad, I don't know where you got this source of inspiration from, but all my compliments."

He circled around me, scanning my appearance with interest.

"I feel weird."

"It's normal, since you are using your chakara to keep your transformation." He said calmly and then he grabbed my hand and pulled me back unto the pebbled road. I stare at his hand with astonishment holding mine, dragging me along.

"Wh-wh-what's going on?" I stammered nervously with my cheeks reddening.

He stopped in his tracks and raised his hand to his eye level, which intertwined with mine. He looked at me with confidence.

"In order to get in, I propose that we pretend to be a couple."

I pulled my hand away and retorted.

"What's this now? First you give me the silent treatment for four days and now suddenly you are interacting with me?"

"It has of no importance, if we cannot get in, we'll fail in our mission. I only ask for your cooperation."

I looked at him momentarily unconvinced and unwilling to obey. How could I be nice to him if he treated me in the past four days like a ghost? Kakashi groaned and simply grabbed my wrist and pulled me along. I followed him along like an undisciplined and grumpy kid. At this very moment all my nerves were focused around my wrist. It was comforting to feel his warm and strong hand, holding my wrist again. All the frustration I felt was wiped away, even my stubbornness was gone. We walked quietly, his grip of his hand loosening around my wrist. My wrist which he held, I gently brushed it down so that I could intertwine my hands with his. I knew he looked at me with astonishment, but I kept my gaze fixed to the pebbled road and couldn't hold back a smile. The feeling that grew as our hands touched was thrilling and so comforting. I was longing for this moment so dearly, but some guilt began creeping up my spine.

"Is it uncomfortable for you…For us to be, like this?" he questioned me and looked over at me; I met his gaze and quickly turned my head away to hide my blush and chuckled at the nonsense he said.

"No, not at all. I mean, isn't acting part of the mission? So why get embarrassed or uncomfortable for such a tiny thing?"

"I'm sorry."

I stopped in my steps, stopping Kakashi with me.

"What?"

"Sorry for the past four days, I just had some tiny issues." He apologized calmly, looking at me in the eyes, meaning every single word he pronounced.

I smiled at him with intense delight. How could I stay angry towards him, when he's so cute when he apologizes? I pulled him along with me and giggled.

"Let's go before they lock us out for the night." We walked along each other in perfect content.

About 500 meters in front of us were the gates of the hidden village of Kiri. Once again it was very foggy, chilly and drizzling. I regretted that I ever transformed myself into a woman with such little clothing. I found myself leaning closer to Kakashi.

"Are you cold?"

I nodded and quite unexpectedly he wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me closer. My heart skipped a beat and my face surely was red.

"Is it better like this?" questioned Kakashi in an unusually gentle tone and without looking at him and shyly I nodded. Finally we arrived at the gate and we were stopped by two shinobis guarding the gates.

"What business do you seek in Kirigakure?" he questioned sternly and Kakashi replied calmly with a relaxed manner.

"We want to visit some of my wife's relatives."

While he pronounced wife, he looked at me with a smile in which I shyly returned a smile.

"If you don't show any pass, you cannot enter." Stated the guard firmly and Kakashi was quick to protest.

"We need to find a place to rest. We walked several miles today."

"Even so, without a pass you cannot enter."

I know Kakashi was calm, but he was quick and clever enough to improvise. His hand which was on my waist glided down on my lower stomach, I twitched nervously at his touch.

"For God's sake let us pass! My wife is unwell and extremely exhausted!" he expressed with desperation, sounding so damn convincing.

"Still we cannot let you pass!"

Kakashi groaned and shouted.

"She's pregnant in the third month! Cut us some slack, please!"

Both guards unexpectedly had gone softer and looked at me and exchanged looks with another. One guard gave a head movement to us, to make us come to the table set inside of Kiri, for registration.

"What is your family name?"

"Fukasa."

The one guard drove his finger down the list and suddenly stopped under one line.

"Sempai, they're on the list!" Confirmed the guard to his companion and the senior glanced on the list and immediately took an apologetic stance.

"Tsukasa san, we were expecting you. We apologize for our rudeness; please proceed to the nearby inn."

I gave the guards a grateful smile, as thanks for their politeness. One of the guard suddenly praised Kakashi with a grin.

"You sure are lucky to have found such a beautiful woman. Not to mention the child will inherit her beauty as well."

Kakashi and I like a couple exchanged tender smiles to another and smiled at the guards.

"Could you indicate us to the next inn?" I asked them kindly with one of my radiant smiles.

One of the guards came to us and gave us some clear directions. We walked off keeping our delighted smiles. Then Kakashi and I walked hand in hand to the inn. At the reception an elderly lady welcomed us.

"A room for two I assume?"

Before I could object to that offer, Kakashi bluntly agreed to it.

"Yes, please."

I flashed Kakashi a protesting glare, but he simply ignored it and carried on with his cheerful attitude. The lady gave the keys and we left the reception for our room. As we stepped into the room, I broke away from Kakashi and protested.

"What's the point, Kakashi? I wanted a separate room, you know!"

"Why? Don't you like my company?" he cornered me to the wall, resting his forearm beside my head and speaking in suave manner.

"It's not that."

"Then what is it? Do you feel uncomfortable around me?" he spoke, his face inching closely to mine.

Then he grabbed a strand of my black hair and brought it up to his nose, not once did his eyes leave mine. My heart leaped.

"You look gorgeous, it matches to my taste."

"Well, I cannot deny that you are very handsome as well." I admitted somewhat irritated with my eyes looking aside, but then I raised my eye brow with realisation and looked at him.

"Are you actually seducing me, Kakashi?"

Kakashi chuckled.

"With your current appearance, only a fool wouldn't attempt to do so."

"Let me remind you that we aren't couple material here, only teacher and student."

"Maybe, but that is more interesting, isn't it? A forbidden love between teacher and student, I can imagine such a scandal."

"Yea, maybe in your dreams." I muttered with disinterest and slapped my palms against another and dissolved the jutsu.

My old appearance was back and then with my fingers poking him, I said with reassurance.

"That's a relief, since you don't feel seduced by my usual appearance; I won't feel threatened around you."

Then I walked with my rucksack into the room. It was similar to the previous inn, except it was better kept and had more light. I set my bag on the floor.

"You know, I seriously fell for your acting. I nearly thought I was your wife and pregnant as well."

"Maybe you are." His voice appearing so close behind me and as a response I rolled my eyes and turned to him. Such tricks won't get me that easily, believe me Kakashi! With my arms crossed over my chest and chin raised, I replied confidently.

"Don't get too cocky, okay? I was only complementing your acting skills and if something like THAT had happened, believe me, you'd be long dead."

Kakashi chuckled and raised his eye brow in interest.

"You don't get embarrassed anymore, when I say such stuff, you have improved."

I responded with a confident chuckle.

"After sharing an apartment for several months and going on a mission, I know your strategy pretty well and your moves."

"Don't underestimate me Sara, I am unpredictable."

"Yea, whatever." I scoffed and started unpacking some of my stuff and Kakashi gave a sigh.

"You have become more boring, I preferred those days where you'd become speechless and turn red, when I teased you."

I stopped in my movements and pulled an absurd grimace at his statement.

"If you're planning to vent your lechery on me, than I can tell you're wasting your time, I'm sure other women wouldn't mind."

"Ouch, Sara, such a cold reaction, I think you seriously hurt me."

"Get used to it." I promptly replied, turning my back on him and unpacked my things.

There was a moment of silence, but I could feel Kakashi's gaze on my back. Either Kakashi couldn't find a good comment or he was considering that I may be angry. Well I was sort of annoyed of his teasing and I mean he didn't show any real interest in me. I felt he was like a teacher picking on his student out of utter pleasure. I doubt there were any feelings behind all of his teasing, so why keep on hoping there might be any? Better shutting out my feelings towards him, than letting them grow uncontrollably. I should instead find him a woman, or better he should find one… But why is my heart aching at that thought and why am I unwilling to do such an action?

"Kakashi," I began

"We should focus more on the mission than our pleasures. I don't quite understand why we are disregarding and remaining passive about this, while many innocent people are dying because of this ferocious power, devouring their bodies?"

"Sara, an A-rank mission needs planning and enormous preparation-

-Still! I haven't seen any activity, Kakashi! I want to save those people, no matter how much it costs me or even my life!" I exclaimed at him, facing him with desperation.

Realizing I just got angry, about such a small thing, I placed my hand against my head and sighed, lowering my gaze. Why was I so anxious?

"Kakashi, what am I to you?"

"What?" he repeated with surprise.

His astonishment frustrated me even more, so that I reinforced my tone and demanded for an answer.

"What am I to you, Kakashi?"

I had to know the answer; anything would suffice me and calm my strained nerves. I looked at him firmly, expecting with impatience his answer. For a moment he stared at me blankly, unable to speak, like the air was knocked out of him. Gradually his facial expression softened and he seemed to be hesitating to give me a straight answer, but when he rested his hand on my head, he gave an answer in the most unusually calm and warm voice.

"I regard you as my precious pupil and a good friend."

I felt like a stake has been driven through my heart. Why is it such a big blow to me? Wasn't I expecting this? How could he possibly regard me as more than his pupil? Anyway his story and mine are totally different, our backgrounds are different and not to mention our lives are different. He's not real and I am. Why is it such a big shock, to hear this? Shouldn't I be happy that he considers me as his precious student and friend? Then why is my heart weeping and why have I been raising false hopes although it was predictable and inevitable that rejection was evident? So that's how rejection feels… I had been pathetic and naïve to have ever hoped of some miracle to happen.

"Sara?"

I immediately reacted to his voice and grinned at him cheerfully, although my face muscles felt tense and screamed with protest.

"Yea, well, thanks. I equally regard you as a precious friend and a respectable teacher…Sorry for before - I'll go out for a bit - see ya."

I dashed passed him to the door, transformed into my disguised person and left the room entirely, spilling some tears as I disappeared in the hallway.


	20. Chapter 19

**Heya my dear readers!! OMG my laptop had a virus and i needed to put the recovery disk in and i lost all my things!! Thank God though that i saved my stories on a usb disk -huff-!! However i lost all my music -sniff- Here's a new chapie for you guys, hope you enjoy it and PLEASE give me some /- reviews!!**

* * *

**CHAPTER NINTEEN**

- The awakening and the real truth has been spilt -

I walked along the crowded, beautifully lit and romantic road of the evening night. Many lanterns hung outside, attracting attention of the by-passers to the restaurants and shops. My mind played tricks on me, I thought seeing Kakashi everywhere, because many men had silvery grey hair, but looked ugly all together. Also once again I saw many couples holding their hands and it kept on stinging my heart. Considerably I received a lot of attention, since I was disguised in a dark beauty, but I didn't pay once attention to any of the viewers. My mind was in turmoil, although Kakashi's answer wasn't a declaration of love, I felt it was some sort of indirect rejection, telling me it's impossible between us… And truthfully I felt the same. Most importantly my heart wouldn't cope with the pain, after all, one day I'll leave this world and go back to my own. Life would be back to normal again and I would live my life "Kakashiless" until my death. I must admit that I'm behaving like a child, naively believing such a guy could possibly have feelings for me and that it actually might work between us, however I've ignored the consequences. The consequences that maybe I won't be able to love somebody as much as Kakashi and even open myself up to somebody else. Sigh…

I walked down the street and my attention was immediately caught by a large medieval and traditional residence. Thick bleached walls surrounded the main perimeter and heavy oak gates guarded the entrance, it marked the grandeur and prestige of the residence within. The street crossing in front of the residence was deserted and barely used like no human ever walked on it before. It was freaky. Also as I stood, looking from the market street into that street my senses gave me chill down my spine. It was like I could feel something scary, abnormal and even evil emitting from that residence. Curiosity overtook me and I found myself wandering into that street and towards the residence. However before I could reach it, I was suddenly roughly yanked inside a building. The place was dark. I groped for my weapon holster, but realized I didn't have it with me and plus fear paralyzed my body. The door was sharply shut and I heard some movements coming towards me. For once I felt helpless and afraid. Then I heard something scratch against something rough and a flame erupted from the tip of a match, illuminating the face behind the flame. I gasped in horror at the presence in front of me; it was a man whose entire face was bandaged except for his black piercing eyes and his spiky crimson hair. He seemed anything but friendly. Also it was very unusual to see a person with such hair in the village of Kiri.

"Interesting, you are using Henge jutsu to conceal your identity." He noticed with a calm but amused voice.

Before I could answer he took a firm grip of my arm and dragged me further into the room, until we entered another room and shut the door behind him. There he let go of me and switched the light on, illuminating his appearance and the room we were in. My eyes immediately fell upon him, he wore a typical Kiri villager clothes and had a slender and athletic appearance. For some reason there was something strange about him, he emitted a mysterious and even scary aura. His striking black eyes and striking crimson hair, made him look like some sort of demon, although he had possibly very human features. Finally I took notice of my surroundings, we were in some sort of living room which was largely decorated by antics such as furnitures and other artefacts 

and behind the guy I saw some stairs winding up to another floor. I immediately guessed he was maybe the owner of an antic shop. All too suddenly I felt something sharp brushing against my throat and the man that stood a second ago in front of me, was standing behind me with his kunai underneath my throat.

"What's your business with the Fuhei Clan?" He spoke with his voice calmly threatening me.

The fear vanished from my body, because I had an idea. A smirk grazed my lips.

I instantly grabbed the kunai, ignoring the fact that it sliced into my palm and yanked it out of his grip. Briskly I turned around and splattered my blood over his bandaged face that it went into his eyes. Since he closed his eyes and tried wiping it out of his eyes, I punched him in the stomach so that he slammed his back against the nearby wall. Speedily I grabbed his throat and raised him up. I secretly marvelled at my strength.

"That's not how you treat a woman. You should know a woman's wrath is always fearsome." I sneered with pleasure.

The guy's hands gripped for my hands, trying to remove them from his neck. Knowing that I don't kill people I removed my hands, letting him drop to his knees and I walked away from him, heading back to the door. However before I could reach it, one kunai grazed my shoulder and my lower leg, causing me to sink to my knees. I gasped painfully, clutching my wounds. I heard the guy moving and no sooner I found him looking down on me.

"You sure are strong for a woman."

"You've got no idea." I answered confidently and instantly kicked him down and he landed on his back.

I got up and wiped the dust from my black kimono.

"Stop wasting my time, I've got more important stuff to do than kick your ass."

"You mean to destroy that sacred scroll inside the Fuhei residence?"

"Why would I reveal to a total stranger what I'm doing, especially one who kills his opponents before he questions them?"

The guy chuckles and gets back to his feet.

"It's my job to test those who have interest in the Fuhei clan, to check if they can undermine the clan, because you aren't the only person who tried to destroy the scroll."

"Oh, so Mister Freako believes that I'm going to get that thingy NOW in the middle of the evening?! Have you ever heard of the word "curiosity"?"

"Aren't you a shinobi?"

"If that would be the case, do you think I would tell you?!"

Then I groaned, clutching my wounded shoulder and I sunk to my knees once more. He came over to help me up, but I pushed him away from me. I pulled my kimono a bit down revealing my bare shoulder with the cut, the wound regenerated underneath his eyes and the surprise reflected in his eyes. The wound on my palm regenerated and the one on my leg as well. I gave a smirk and walked to him.

"If you don't let me out, I'll make sure there will be nothing left of you." I threatened him and had the kunai pointing towards his throat.

"You're pretty good."

"Oh, you just noticed, I have a good teacher."

"Isn't it the guy with the pitch black hair that accompanied you to the inn?" I stepped away from him, this guy was scaring me, and how come did he know so much? I thought we were very discrete while entering the village.

"So you both are the elite shinobis from Konoha, then?"

I did not answer him but kept the kunai firmly in my grip, ready at any moment if he would attack me.

"Who the hell are you?" I demanded with hostility and the man chuckled.

"I never thought you would ask, I'm Akai and am a member of the Fuhei clan."

Instinctively, battle prepared I positioned my kunai. He raised his palms and said quickly.

"Don't worry; I'm banished from the clan."

Still full of distrust I glared at him.

"I know it all sounds suspicious to you, but I was banished from the clan because I opposed to the use of this sacred scroll's power."

Gradually I lowered the kunai but kept it still my hand, if I might be assaulted.

"However as punishment I received a full dose of this monstrous power and since I was suffering from the side effects and my conditions were worsening by the days, they decided to throw me out of the residence and let me rot on the street. Nonetheless lying somewhere in the corner for some days, I managed to get control over this power but at a terrible price."

He grabbed a part of the bandage and pulled it down, so that the bandage fell down to the ground. I stared with wide eyes at his face. His face was stretched outwards, revealing some light canine and an aggressive demoniac facial expression and only now did his black eyes match to his entire face.

"That happens if you get an overdose of such power and the problem is, as the days and months pass by you gradually lose more and more control over yourself. One day you might turn into a demon himself. It would turn out like the attack on Konoha with the kyuubi."

I couldn't believe any of this, this scroll contains such monstrous powers that it transforms them into full fledged demons?! It gave me a stronger urge to destroy this scroll.

"Isn't your family aware of your survival?"

He gave a scoff.

"My family? They died long since this cursed scroll arrived in my clan. I just want that this cursed scroll is destroyed and my family included."

"But I thought many of them are innocent and have been forced this destiny upon them?"

Once again he scoffed.

"You've heard the wrong information, but my whole clan is corrupted since the arrival of this scroll. Can you actually believe that my father forced me to absorb this power? He was the one who threw me out like some trash! All of them deserve death!"

As a reaction I slapped him.

"Nobody deserves death, even the biggest criminal in the world! It's sinful to take somebody's life. You are only blind by the hatred against you clan, I'm sure many of them are afraid to openly oppose the clan since they are oppressed by terror!" I scolded him firmly.

The guy rested his hand against his smacked cheek and then chuckled.

"Amazing you are the second person to slap me."

"Well guys of your kind need slapping to bring them back to their reasons."

Then I took notice of his hair.

"Actually your hair is it part of the transformation?"

Akai nodded.

"I had brown hair before, but now I look like a half demon."

"I think you look okay, maybe just normal people won't be able to handle this."

I told him frankly and he smiled at me.

"Judging by your healing abilities and inhuman reflexes, I presume you are victim of the same fate." He assumed.

I lowered my gaze

"My demon only stirs in me when I'm incredibly angry, otherwise he's dormant."

"Do you carry any seals?"

I shook my head.

"You must be physically very strong to contain your demon, normally the seals help to contain the demon, but it's amazing that you don't have any."

"I don't see anything amazing about that, having seals are more comforting than having none."

I realized how this topic strained me so I quickly changed the topic.

"Since you are an outcast from the Fuhei clan, are you willing to help us?"

Akai didn't show any signs of hesitation, he seemed even determined to help me.

"I'll help you infiltrating the residence if you want and pass some information, however I won't set foot into my residence."

"It's a deal then?" I outstretched my hand and he shook it determinedly.

"Okay the first information, I must give you, is that it's impossible to infiltrate the residence."

"What?" I repeated with disbelief and he nodded.

"You shouldn't underestimate my clan. Their power and unpredictability render them to the most fearsome opponents in whole Kiri. We shouldn't forget that half of them have absorbed various amounts of this power and are variably strong. Except for one Fuhei who alone survived the power since he was a baby…"

"You mean the next heir of the clan?"

Akai nodded.

"His name is Ronen and is the strongest in whole Kiri together."

The very thought of it scared me, how could we get the scroll without getting confronted by those half demons?

"A direct attack and infiltration, has until now failed ceaselessly."

"Than how are we supposed to get this scroll, if it's impossible to get close to them?"

"Only if you manage to destroy them from the inside, will it be possible to get the scroll."

Immediately an idea popped into my head and I questioned him.

"How many are there altogether."

"A hundred."

"Oh, okay."

"Did they announce anything special lately?"

Akai contemplated for a moment, then his eyes widened, showing that he realized something.

"In fact, they are on the look out for a bride for Ronen. He's 20 now."

A smirk crept over my face and I headed to the door.

"Thanks for the info, Akai, I'm forever in your debt and by the way my name is Sara, and see ya another time."

I left the first room and when I was about to leave the building entirely, I bumped into a wall of warm flesh which blocked my passage to the door. The grip against my shoulder indicated tension.

"What you are planning to do is beyond risky."

"I know that, but that's for the better cause."

"You'll die."

"Of course not, Akai! There you underestimate me completely, my healing abilities prevent me from death, this demon inside me is also keeping me alive and my will keeps me going as well."

"Aren't you risking more than your life, you'll pretend to love Ronen and steal the scroll and bring it back to Konoha?"

"I don't care if I have to sacrifice myself, but I don't want to see more people suffering of this horrible fate." I declared firmly and moved him aside and before I left the building I added calmly.

"If you wanna visit me, come to the inn, okay?"

I walked with quick paces back to the inn; it was already very late at night. Judging by darkness of the sky and the fog and the crowds of people dissipating revealed that it was late. Damn! Also my shoulder and leg was hurting! Does Akai always greet people like this by throwing kunais on them and nearly killing them?! Finally I reached the inn and simply rushed up the stairs and along the hallway, until with a knock I entered the room. The room was plunged into darkness. I closed the door behind me and stood still, staring into the darkness of the room. I loved the darkness, but tonight there was something strangely out of place about and I couldn't put my finger on it. I was quite sure it was Kakashi's doing, so I boldly stepped into the dark room. Everything went so quickly within seconds I found myself pinned down against the floor by firm hands. All of a sudden a pair of lips crushed mine, anxiously, demandingly and desperately kissing me. I was too shocked to respond and my mind was rather focused on the effect it created against my body rather than knowing the stranger. Then his grip softened against my wrists and his hands suddenly intertwined with my own. Such lean and firm hands! Whoever he was, certainly he was a good kisser and the worst part was my body refused to move a muscle. I was drunk for more. His body brushed against mine and instantly I could feel that he wasn't wearing a shirt. I gasped in his kiss. Why was this person so anxious? Why so desperate? While his kissing became more passionate, I realized I still haven't dissolved the Henge jutsu so I still was in my beautiful disguise and in a light kimono. For some strange reason I felt relaxed around that stranger and why was that? Why and who was he? Why in the hell was my body going mad for such a man, who was a complete stranger to me? His hands left mine and travelled over to my curves. Such a thrill went down to the tip of my toes! Time stopped around us, like heaven descended upon us. He quickly pulled apart to catch his breath. His breath scalded my face, what was he waiting for? Caught up by this longing I captured his lips right after he paused. He was surprised of my final response to his kissing and no sooner he joined in, kissing me feverishly and longingly back. I wonder how my heart could cope with all this excitement without exploding once. How could his lips be so soft and so addictive to me? SARA! Get a grip of yourself! For God's sake you are kissing a total stranger!! What do you think Kakashi would feel if he'd see you like this?!...On the other hand forget about him, this guy he's a damn good kisser and knows how to please a woman. Then he pulled away and he showered my neck with light kisses causing me to dig my nails into his shoulders out of excitement. With one hand he pushed part of my kimono down so that he could shower kisses on my shoulder. I was going crazy! I wanted to scream and shout in ecstasy, but I bit my lip back to stop myself from making any noise. Once again he captured my lips, kissing me passionately and more relaxed than he was before. While we kissed his hand skilfully slithered from my neck down to my collar bone and then it slid down between my chest, out of shock I bit his lip and he instantly pulled back. Unexpectedly somebody knocked and the person got up and walked over to the source. I heard some incoherent and low whispering, something was shut and some storming footsteps headed 

back to me. Quite brusquely the light flooded the entire room, blinding me sharply. After rubbing my eyes and blinking, the blurred figure gradually became clearer. My heart stopped dead at the sight. Dressed only in his pants stood the real silver haired Kakashi! His body was shining in sweat and his uncovered face had a bloody lip. He stared at me, like he was caught doing something really bad and gradually his face was revealing some blush. We stared at each other blankly and both our faces turned red out of embarrassment. None of us could find the words, or even the excuses. Then I noticed he was scanning my whole appearance and since I was still quite dazed about what happened and still quite drunk of desire, it took me longer to realize why he was looking at me like this. With not even a single tone, I finally realized why he was looking at me with such eyes. My kimono was very loose, it revealed largely my left shoulder but luckily did not show my chest entirely and the kimono itself showed my thighs very well. Overall I looked extremely provocative and I could tell I was tempting Kakashi strongly. I slapped my palms against each other to dissolve the jutsu and my old self was back, dressed in my shinobi attire. I broke eye contact with him; I wished the ground could engulf me now! Kakashi cleared his throat nervously.

"I'm sorry – I didn't mean to – I-" he stammered with a clogged voice and with a groan he slapped his hand against his forehead.

Once again there was a moment of silence. I never heard or seen him this nervous in my life, he panted and twitched.

"I'm sorry I got you mixed up with somebody else…I-I'll go take a shower." He blurted out, hastily grabbed parts of his clothes, rummaged through his bag and dashed out of the room.

I fell back on the floor. His warmth, touches, breath and taste was recorded on my body and always when I closed my eyes the scene replayed in front of me. The places his body touched left burns on my body like a reminder. I rolled over pulling my knees up to my chin. I brushed my fingers over my lips and instantly remembered him kissing me. My entire body registered his warmth and tenderness. My face turned even redder at a realization, if whoever hadn't knocked at the door we might've done it… I buried my face in my hands. GOD that was close! A bright and tender smile crossed my lips and I rolled over the floor back and forth in excitement and giggles. However tears began to form in my eyes and no sooner it cascaded down my cheeks. I found myself sobbing on the floor, confused about my reaction and confused whether I should be happy or sad. All I know that my mind was in such turmoil and that I was extremely exhausted.

The next morning I woke up, staring at the murky ceiling. My eyes were sore of exhaustion and I felt irritable. I couldn't get one eye shut without going back to scene of last night! Gosh, my body was craving for his closeness and it scared the hell out of me! I couldn't look to my side fearing Kakashi might be there so I rolled over, my face bathing in total embarrassment and blush. My fingers came across my lips…His kisses were so hot and deep which expressed his deepest feelings, but to whom was this kiss reserved to? I doubt it was for me. I mean his reaction from last night, proved to me that it was all an accident and who wouldn't blush and get embarrassed in such a situation? However I cannot get this thought out of my head, if nobody had knocked, we might've…Done it. I hate to say this, but it was a relief that we hadn't gone far! How would we have reacted to each other, if we found it was us…? I threw the covers over my head, my face was boiling. GOD! I MUST STOP THIS! DAMN IT! IT WAS ONLY AN ACCIDENT!! NOTHING MORE! HE JUST PROVED TO ME THAT HE HAD INTEREST IN OTHER WOMEN… Than why does my heart sting at the thought that he prefers other women to me? My eyes were prickling; I had spilled all tears possible from my body. It was strange, one 

part of me was gleeful of this mishap, but another part was cursing me for ever giving into such a thing. My mind was muddled up of this whole event, I was confused and hesitating whether to regard this mishap as something great or bad… It was out of the question that I should avoid this issue after all it was only an accident…Well a big and embarrassing accident. I pulled my cover down and slowly turned over. The space that was intend for Kakashi to sleep on was empty, no sign of a soul slept there, not even the tatami was laid out. I sighed with melancholy. He hasn't slept here; he must've been greatly embarrassed about this mishap. Not to mention, how could he cope that his feelings were accidentally poured out on me rather than on the person he loved? Who does he love? Is it maybe Rin, his old team mate? Or some unknown woman? I sat up rubbing the sleep out of my eyes and got up, to get dressed. As I was fully dressed, I grabbed some of my toilet treats to take a shower.

I walked along the hallway, feeling refreshed from the shower and I stood in front of the door. With my hand raised to knock on the door, I stopped dead in my movements. My heart hammered against my chest, I heard some movements inside and I was afraid to enter. One side feared that Kakashi was in the arms of another woman and another was the fear to face him. I took a deep breath, I knocked and paused, and then I entered the room. There was Kakashi, folding up my tatami and putting it back into the cupboard. Finally he took notice of me and greeted me.

"'Morning."

I gave a quiet "morning" to him and immediately diverted my eyes, finding it difficult to control the blush rising to my cheeks and my hammering heart beats. I went to my bag to put away my things, but I did it very slowly. The silence was unbearable and very awkward. To clear this silence Kakashi cleared his throat.

"I brought the breakfast up."

"Thanks." I squeaked.

I bit my lip at my strangled response. I cleaned up my stuff around my rucksack and then joined Kakashi at the table. My nervousness was evident, avoiding his gaze and holding my trembling chop sticks. Gosh! Why was it so difficult to control myself?! And what added up to the whole thing was that I lost my appetite! This guy was sitting across of me, how the HELL was I supposed to keep cool in front of his presence? The way Kakashi placed his bowl back on the table and his gaze following me, he was well aware of my nervousness.

"Sara, let me help you out with your food." He offered and without me giving a response, he took my bowl and filled it up with the foods that were in the small bowls.

He placed it in front of me and I uttered a quiet "thanks" without once looking at him. I wish that incident never took place, because I felt extremely embarrassed to even face him. Damn! I should get a grip of myself.

"Sara…I know how you feel and…I'm really sorry for last night."

Kakashi you don't know how I feel! How should you? My feelings are overpowering me and tempting me to assault you any moment now!

"Looks like my statement about regarding you as a precious pupil, seems invalid now." He supplied with some dry humour, which failed miserably since I wasn't responding at the slightest.

"Sara, you have to know, I feel as much embarrassed as you, maybe even more than you…Since I was the one who started with the whole-

-And you say you mixed me up with another woman?" I uttered with indifference.

"I did! I was in part drunk and I have ordered a woman to-

-I get it already!" I shouted at him, standing on my feet with desperation and fury bubbling in my system.

"That's why I told you to get us two separate rooms, dammit! So I don't get involved into your private life!"

"Sara, you have countless times encountered my private life. And if you were so anxious to stop then why haven't stopped me last night?"

The oxygen was cut from my system and I stared at him blankly. His calm but piercing gaze was steadily fixed on me. I cannot tell him! It'll hurt me more than him.

"I don't know! I'm confused, my mind's in complete turmoil!" I shouted in desperation, clutching my head and I ran to the door, but was briskly dragged back in by Kakashi's firm hand.

"Let's solve this like grown ups, so no running away!" he declared in his strict teacher mode.

My eyes fell on his hand, which gripped my wrist and the flash backs flooded my mind. Abruptly I pulled my hand from his grip and looked away with red in my face.

"You are unfair, Kakashi. You ask those questions so casually without considering the feelings of the other person. How am I supposed to answer you in my momentary state? How am I supposed to act normally in front of you after what happened last night?"

"I don't understand how you can consider this an "accident"? It's a relief for my heart and my mind that the woman - who was supposed to be in my place - stopped us from going any further!"

My voice dropped to a mutter.

"But I don't know what's worse, to have experienced this or see it from the spectator's view…"

A moment of silence fell between us. Indirectly I revealed my feelings to him and now it was up to him to realise it. Then I recapitulated quickly, changing the topic entirely.

"I've got a plan for our mission."

Kakashi groaned.

"Sara! Leave this by side, now! I want to settle this first!"

I turned my head to him and reproached.

"Well I DON'T! This has of little importance! What has gotten into you, Kakashi? Haven't you been taught to disregard any personal issues during the missions? Or have you become softer?"

Kakashi's patience exploded with him.

"I haven't! It's you who has softened me up! You and your pathetic speeches of becoming more human and more sensitive perturbed my mind and my performance!"

What happened next was highly unexpected from my part, but I was caught up in intense emotions and confusion that I just let my body react how it naturally would. With a crack the table collapsed underneath the weight of Kakashi's impact. The food was scattered all over the floor and Kakashi stared at me, shocked of my reaction. I hate to say this, but this enticed a new pleasurable feeling inside of me, I actually enjoyed punching him. I closed my eyes, twitching involuntarily and baring a sadistic smirk. For once I didn't pay any attention to my conscience but bathed in this enticing and glorious feeling of power. I opened my eyes and looked down on Kakashi with such a cold look, which he replied with a shocked face. I sniggered to myself and I observed my hand.

"How pathetic is that girl? Believing she could contain me by sheer will force? This scroll will help me to unleash my true wrath upon you mere humans! With my power I can destroy all of you! Mouhahahah!" I spoke with growing conceit and malice.

Oh! How much I craved for power!

"Demon! Where have you put Sara?"

I looked at Kakashi, cracking my neck and looking at him bloodthirstily.

"I've got a name you know, its Fujin. Where she is, she has given up and let me take control."

"What?" repeated Kakashi with disbelief and I sniggered sinisterly.

"You naïve and dense human. It's clear she isn't meant for this world, this poor thing thinks by escaping her world she can live here in peace?"

"What are you talking about?"

I sniggered maliciously and superiorly.

"Truthfully we aren't from this world. We come from another dimension, where none of this exists or more importantly our world is real and yours not."

Kakashi was bewildered of my statement and couldn't cope with this reality, so that he demanded for a clearer answer.

"What do you mean by this?"

I chuckled maliciously.

"Kakashi, Kakashi. We know everything possible of this world, what happened in the past and what will happen in the future. After all - all of this - is only a fictional story drawn by a man who worships shinobis and Sara read nearly all those books. This is the answer of your doubts about her, how she knows Konoha, its people and the shinobi world. And I was created by her hatred towards the society."

Kakashi stared at me, so horrified and bewildered as I never had witnessed in my stay in this world.

"If you said you were created by her hatred, than she didn't have you before?"

I sneered

"No I was always present in her – however by landing into this world I became substantial and evolved into a demon. I grow stronger and stronger the more she feeds me with her hatred. It's thanks to you and your pathetic companions, she grew stronger physically, perfectly able to adapt my power in her body."

"How did you come to this world, since you said you came from another dimension?" Kakashi's impatience and anxiety was evident.

I gave him a direct piercing look and smirked devilishly.

"I should ask you Kakashi, isn't your new technique the Mangekyou Sharingan able to send things through dimensions?"

Kakashi was startled of my knowledge over his secret technique that he has been working on. He immediately defended himself.

"I cannot send people through dimensions if I don't have them standing in front of me."

"You are wrong Kakashi, because this technique can only be mastered by lots of training or by a true Uchiha, you made a blunder and sucked in Sara into your dimension. Of course I'm eternally grateful to you for invoking Sara's body into this world, without you I wouldn't have achieved my full strength."

"That's why she knew so much and that is why she was evasive and traumatized towards violence and she could predict so many moves. But why hide all of this from me?" said Kakashi, overwhelmed by the impact of the truth.

"Ha! Kakashi, don't pretend to be stupid! This girl is afraid to be rejected and the thought of having people she treasures to hate her, resulted her to lie, most importantly towards you."

Kakashi looked at me in confusion and I sniggered.

"Why do you pretend to be so ignorant, Kakashi? It's written all over her face and her behaviour, she's only filled with you and if I am not wrong…Aren't you same towards her?"

Kakashi shrunk back so suddenly, like he was caught red handed with a secretive intention. He recapitulated quickly in a defensive tone.

"Of course not!"

"Don't play coy with me Kakashi. How many times have you used an excuse to be close to her, to feel her?"

Kakashi was baffled and horrified of how much he was exposed towards his enemy. I added with a conceit tone.

"You are severally weakened because of your "soft spot" for Sara, I'm sure she's endangering your shinobi career and your performances."

Then I outstretched my arm invitingly.

"Join me and I'll reward you with unimaginable power."

"Unimaginable power, you say?" sounded Kakashi very interested.

"Oh, yes, we'll share the power from this sacred scroll and rule the shinobi world."

Kakashi walked towards me under a totally different shine; first time in my life I saw his face showing malice. He approached me and briskly punched me in the guts and wrapped an arm around my back to hold me. The air was knocked out of me and speechlessly I stared at him with disbelief. His face grazed my cheek and his voice whispered firmly in my ear.

"As long as I live, I won't let a demon take possession of somebody I care."

Then his voice became gentler and his arms laced around me, held me firmly against him.

"As long as you, Sara, stay by my side…I could never want more."

Something happened to me… What's this, tears? I felt that liquid rolling down my cheeks, the anger that was present slowly faded away and so as the world around me. This warmth that emitted from Kakashi's embrace warmed my cold heart and melted this ball of hatred in me. This serene and beautiful feeling spread through my system, washing away all this meaningless resentment, I felt like weeping and the tears just kept on pouring like it had no tomorrow. Before I could utter a word, my senses numbed and the dizziness struck me and finally engulfed me into total blackness.


	21. Chapter 2o

**Heya!! Thanks for all reviews!! I'm so happy btw thanks for the correction, I do have problems with PARAGRAPHS as you put it blunlty. My mother's tongue is English, but I only started studying in English 4 yrs ago. Anyway thanks for pointing it out, though, but don't be too hopeful that I'll be correcting everything single thing oki? I've finished this fic since maybe 5 months ago, so sorry to ALL you guys that its a bit shaky here and there... -huff- Anyway... I LOVE THIS STORY and am happy that it makes you happy**!! **So, enjoy and pls always review**!!

* * *

**CHAPTER TWENTY**

- A shocking confession that strengthens our determination -

There was this unfamiliar warmth lingering against my body, embracing me so tenderly, what was it? It granted me comfort and safety. However since I was exhausted I dozed off. As time flew by and I was slowly waking, the warmth and reassurance that surrounded me had vanished, leaving me bare. I sat up and was immediately struck by a sharp pain in my stomach; I heaved a groan and clutched my stomach. The door opened and Kakashi stepped in with a tray. He instantly noticed me and met me with a cheerful face.

"Morning' I brought you some tea."

He placed the tray on the table and brought me the cup of steaming tea. I gratefully took it and sipped from it. The tea had an immediate effect against my pain and also relaxed me and the taste was wonderful, rendering me cheerful.

"Has your stomach being hurting this morning?"

I nodded quietly and glancing at him from time to time. He was kneeling beside me and once again silence had become accustomed around us.

"What happened? Why am I in bed? Why don't I remember anything and what's with the pain?" I exploded with anxiety bombarding him with urgent questions.

He chuckled at my keenness and he cleared his throat.

"You wouldn't believe even if I told you."

"Just tell me." I put the cup to my lips, blowing its contents and finally looking at Kakashi.

He looked at me seeming to hesitate, but he gave in by taking a deep breath.

"Fujin, your demon fellow, took possession of your body and I had to take drastic measures to knock you out."

I froze dead and stared at him with all the colours draining from my face. Kakashi was quick enough to grab my cup before my grip loosened around it. He placed the cup back on the tray and looked at me with such a serious attitude that it discomforted me.

"It seems that Fujin only takes possession of you when you're under extreme emotions, such as rage and desperation."

My mouth opened and closed, no sound came out. I was struck by anxiety and fear. My nightmare became true.

"I managed to control you by punching you in the guts and reasoning with your unconscious side."

I lowered my head.

"So that's why right after I punched you in the face, I had a black out." I realized with my voice sounding strangled by fear.

The cup hovered in front of my face, Kakashi's hand held it. He gave me a reassuring gaze, with my shaking hands I took it and sipped from it. This tea managed to calm me down, but the stress and the fear was evident in my behaviour.

"Your demon is very ambitious." Mentioned Kakashi calmly, now sitting comfortably cross-legged in front of me.

I looked at him with confusion.

"He wouldn't stop blabbering about how he would take over the world with his power unified with the scroll's power. However before he could begin that ideal, he utterly miscalculated the fact that I could knock you out in swift movement."

I stared at Kakashi, horrified of what I just heard. He instantly realized my frozen behaviour and he comfortingly patted my shoulder.

"Don't worry, I found a way to control that demon and believe me, he doesn't stand a chance against your will."

It did comfort me to some extent, but the fear was still there, what if I lost complete control and kill Kakashi? I would never forgive myself if that ever happened. Suddenly anxiety struck me and immediately I questioned Kakashi with incertitude.

"Uhm, Kakashi?"

"Hmm?"

"Did, uhh, my demon say other stuff, since I was unconscious?"

Kakashi observed me, before replying calmly.

"No, he didn't say more, since I took immediate actions. Actually I must thank you that you told me you possessed a demon, if you hadn't, I'd certainly be dead with whole Kiri included."

I gaped in horror at what he said, was my demon so strong as into destroying a whole village. I lowered my face.

"It's the same as the cursed Kyuubi who nearly destroyed Konoha." I mumbled and the silence once again fell on us.

After a pause Kakashi cleared his throat.

"Sara, I suppose you weren't born with this demon in your body, am I right?"

My head immediately jerked up.

"I doubt anybody transferred that demon inside you."

I did not answer, but only my heart who was beating with dread, warned me he was close to getting the truth. All of a sudden Kakashi looked at me with such a serious face that it revealed to me that he knew something and it shocked me.

"Your demon told me he was born from your resentment towards your society… Why is that?"

I was sure all the blood drained from my face. My mouth opened and closed, my trembling hands gripped the covers and I looked at them, dread paralyzed my entire body. One could say Kakashi answered one of my questions and instead of relieving me, it just burdened me. All of a sudden I was on my feet and I looked down to him, having regain self-control over my fear and I retorted coldly.

"None of your business!"

Kakashi didn't expect my sudden reaction and only stared at me. I pointed at him threateningly with my index finger.

"And you, huh! Do you even bother telling me your "problems", no of course not! Because it doesn't concern me, so why would you care!"

"I DO care!" he exclaimed back at me, steady on his feet and out of breath.

I froze. I stared at him blankly…What? ... The time seemed to have stopped due to the words he spoke out so desperately. Instead of feeling happy, horror struck me at its full might. Kakashi was quick to recapitulate.

"I meant, by I…do care about the state of my pupil. If my pupil is burdened than I am willing to listen quietly."

I gave a contemptuous chuckle.

"What has gotten into you Kakashi? Concern has never been your quality and all so suddenly you are actually showing some emotions? What is this? Some kind of game to you?"

Before Kakashi could protest, I interjected quickly with a firm tone to make him swallow his words.

"I'm going to leave you and work solo."

I walked over to my bag, which was fortunately completely packed and no sooner I stood ready to leave in front of the door. Kakashi instantly grabbed my wrist and I looked at him, somewhat surprised. In his eye glinted desperation and another element unknown to me, only that it made his eye beautiful.

"Sara..." He murmured, it nearly sounded like a plead.

I was perplexed of his reaction. However a remarkable smile grazed my lips and promptly I pulled him close to me to embrace him. His startle was obvious in his rigid body language and his slow reaction. I stood on the tip of my toes to whisper in his ear gently.

"Thank you."

With a thud, Kakashi lost consciousness. My clone disappeared in a puff of smoke behind Kakashi. I dragged him further into the room to lay him down onto my messed up bed. I covered his unconscious figure with the blankets and observed him. He looked so peaceful for a man who bore so much hardship. I stretched my hand over to his head gear and undid it and set it aside. I repeated the same action with his hand guards. Once again my eyes fell on his face. Hesitantly I leaned over him and reached for his mask to pull it down carefully. His face was exposed to me and I lowered my face down to his, my lips hovering inches above his. His facial features were gorgeous. My heart hammered against my ribs and my face was burning, however I managed to get my resolve and I placed my lips on his. I gave what seemed like my ever last kiss to him. I pulled back and was back on my feet. I walked to the door and swung my bag over my shoulders. I cast a last glance on Kakashi's unconscious figure and left the room without a word.

I walked along the same road I had taken the day the so-called incident happened… My heart jerked against my chest thinking of what I just did a moment ago. I covered my mouth region with my palm. Why did I kiss him? Why in God's name have I done this? Is it meaningful for me to do this, although I'm not from this world? Is it even worthwhile? How long do I have to hold those feelings inside of me, for days, months, years or…Forever? And what's pulling a strain on my heart is that he regards me as his student, not as a lover. The hope is dead, but why…Do I keep on believing otherwise? Believing that actually he could love me? My attention was immediately drawn to the old dusty antic shop. I walked over and knocked on the door.

"We're closed." Erupted the irritated voice from within the shop.

I leaned against the door and called in.

"It's me, Sara, open up please." I pleaded.

The door instantly swung open and I was dragged in and the door slammed behind me.

"What the hell are you doing at this hour of day at my door!" he hissed through clenched teeth and watchfully looked out of his wooden stores.

He gripped my arm firmly and yanked me to the next room and slammed the door behind him.

"Are you nuts to come by my place, do you want to blow my cover?"

"I'm sorry – I didn't mean to come here in broad day time, but I need your help."

He paced around his room impatiently and groaned.

"I told you, I won't involve myself in any of this!"

"Akai, please!"

"No! Not in my right mind, will I step into that deranged place!"

"I'm not asking you to do that!" I shouted at him furiously and immediately he swallowed his words.

"God! What's wrong with all men lately? Now I get scolded by my companion and now by YOU! I'll leave then!" I barked at him and I stormed out of the door and was about to grab the handle of the other door, where I was roughly yanked back.

As I wanted to protest my mouth was covered by Akai's bandaged hand.

"Psht! be quiet!" he hushed me warningly and looked out of his stores.

I immediately understood his cautious behaviour, because outside stood a bunch of men dressed in kinagashis with hakamas' (Medieval samurai kimono with a pair of baggy pants over them) they all appeared from my modern point of view like Yakuzas except in medieval version. They were armed with sabres attached on their sides and walked in proud strides along a central figure, which immediately caught my attention. This young man was the handsomest among his followers; he had silky raven hair tied in a long pony tail. His body structure was slender and attractive. His allure was graceful and dignified and he emitted a mysterious aura, which pricked on my curiosity. I must admit he was unimaginably handsome. As the group of men were far away enough, I uttered.

"That is definitely Ronen."

"It's easy to guess and worst of all he's my step brother."

He released me and headed back to the other room and I followed him agape of his statement.

"What he's your step brother?"

Akai closed the door and nodded without looking at me. I could tell he was discomforted about his topic, but not to talk about it would be unwise.

"So he's 20." I suggested and he nodded.

He sat down on an ancient plush comfortable chair and ignored my presence.

"So you would be certainly in your thirties."

"No, I'm thirty. He witnessed my banishment from the clan and originally I should have become the predecessor."

I gaped at this information, okay, this guy pretends to be a total stranger to his clan and suddenly he shows some nostalgia towards his clan? There was a moment of silence, where he just stared in front of him and I softened up to him.

"You never hated your clan, right?"

His head jerked up and looked at me, horrified that I could read his behaviour. I sat down across of him on a chair and said with a smile.

"It's normal, no matter how much injustice you received; still it's your home."

He looked at me; the words were stuck in his throat.

"I confess I hate my home as well. My family treats me like I was some sort of ignorant, spoiled and selfish kid. Life is difficult in a family, who have a certain expectation over each other and soon as you don't meet their expectations they pick on you like a bunch of vultures over a dead prey." I stated with bitter humour, but I reconsidered my words and spoke with nostalgia.

"However I do love them and who knows maybe my mind is playing tricks on me about my judgment over them. Nevertheless, I've learned something at my stay here, the love towards my family and this unbearable longing to be close to them, drives me nuts."

"Those aren't words of a shinobi." Stated Akai directly and I met his eyes with confusion.

"You are actually much too emotional for a shinobi from Konoha."

"Say as much as you want about me, I don't care about people's opinions." I stated sternly and glared at him.

Akai gave a short chuckle and he got up, his emotional state was stable again.

"Anyway, what is your business here?"

"I would need some shelter and a second brain to plot my plan."

Underneath the wrinkle of his bandage in the mouth region, he smirked at the idea and without rejection he accepted my requirements.

"Follow me."

I followed him up the spiral steps and stepped into his real home, it was a flat. It was one large room nicely arranged in the traditional style, composing of dark oak furnitures, circle of comfy cushions around a small table, a kitchen in the corner, a bed in the other corner, a bookshelf filled with parchments and literature and another door that leads to the bathroom. Simply put a comfortable and enjoyable flat.

"Don't stare at me like that; did you seriously believe I would live in a hole?"

I was surprised yet embarrassed at how he noticed my behaviour and didn't say a word.

"You know even if I lost part of my human characteristic, I know how to decorate my flat to be a home-loving place."

I was a bit ashamed, to have expected that he was a man shrivelled with resentment about his fate.

"Sorry." I muttered and he quickly replied calmly over his back.

"It's no big deal, who wouldn't react like this."

He went to the kitchen and prepared something, whilst I made a tour of his flat. I noticed the semi-curtained windows and I asked him with curiosity.

"So you chose this place in order to be close to your clan?"

He walked to the small table with the tray in his hands and placed it on the table.

"Yea."

"So these windows, look over your clan's residence?" I was on the verge of pulling the curtains open, where he suddenly grabbed my hand to prevent my actions.

"Don't ever open them." He pronounced every word with a stern tone and looked at me seriously, which warned me to comply to his orders.

He pulled his hand away and walked back to the table.

"Why?" I inquired.

He sat down and poured some tea into two cups, he spoke while his attention was focused on the tea cups.

"I dislike if my neighbours spy into my flat."

"You mean you are afraid that they might discover you."

The tea dripped loudly into the tea cups and he didn't answer my statement directly. After he set the tea kettle down he spoke again.

"It could be that. However those curtains are fabricated in a way that contains my demoniac power from detection."

I stared at him with amazement, how could such a thing be possible, well duh, you are in the Naruto world Sara!

"You are safer here, than where you were before."

I looked at him with confusion.

"You know, my senses are highly developed, I sensed your arrival into this village and it would explain my harsh behaviour as I dragged you into my place."

"And if I'm not wrong, you sensed my clan's power from far as well."

I looked at him, kind of uncomfortable and yet relieved. With a flick of his head, he encouraged me to sit down and drink some tea and I complied. I took a sip of it and immediately praised its taste.

"Gosh it's wonderful, what is it?"

"A home-made traditional Fuhei tea, it beats all teas in Kiri."

As it tasted so good and had the similar calming affect like the tea Kakashi gave, I finished its entire content in several gulps and helped myself to more. Akai was simply observing me, seeming to study my behaviour, but I didn't care much only that I savoured in the taste of the tea.

"You know, you don't have to waste you chakara to keep your Henge jutsu." He mentioned calmly and I looked at him, not surprised of his statement since he revealed at our first meeting that I disguised myself. I raised my palm and in a puff of smoke, the jutsu dissolved. He met my true appearance with surprise and interest.

"Woa, I understand now why you underwent the Henge jutsu; you'd be immediately considered as a spy from the snow country."

"That's what they say in Konoha about me, but I don't care and anyway I feel much more comfortable like this than as my disguised self."

"Well, this look suits you better than the other one." He admitted and I gave him an appreciated smile.

My eyes wandered around the room and one thing caught my immediate attention.

"I've got a question."

Since Akai didn't show any objections, I proceeded.

"Do you ever open the curtains or let some fresh air into your flat?"

Akai chuckled at my question, like it was some ridiculous question.

"Of course I do. I don't like living in dust and I have no desire to asphyxiate in my flat."

"But when do you open them, then?"

"At night, it's safer. After ten PM my clan is asleep, they are harmless and hate to say this, but peaceful."

There was a moment of silence; I stared at the hot swirling contents of my tea. My mind drifted to Kakashi. He must be awake by now, unless I severely knocked him out, or that I accidentally killed him. The idea gave a shiver down my spine; I could never forgive myself if that happened.

"Akai." I muttered, warming my unusually cold hands against the hot tea cup and staring at it.

"Hmm?"

"If you held a secret and you knew it would break your friendship if you revealed it, would you keep it a secret or tell it?"

I looked at him, hoping to get an answer. He gave a thought about it.

"Well it depends what secret I am hiding and it depends if the person is a true friend to me or not. Either way, friendship should always be based on trust and truth and that is why it's important to choose your friends wisely, those who can bear your secrets without hesitation." He explained calmly.

The truth stung my heart, the truth is such a hard word, why the hell must I live in lies! Live in fear that my secret may be discovered or the fear about the consequences that will haunt me? Will I ever get the courage to confess my love to Kakashi or to reveal the truth about myself to Kakashi?

"Akai, can a person be called a coward for hiding something that exposes their true side? Can't the person you cherish understand that you are doing this for their sake and not out of selfishness? Can't the others not understand that they shouldn't question about it because it burdens them more? Can't the others understand that he/she cannot reveal this secret even if he/she loses their sanity? Than why in God's name, is there this constant pressure, stressing you to spill it out and ignore the consequences! You know that you cannot say anything, because you'll get too attached and get hurt when reality smacks you in the face. What is the best to remain cold and distant to not get hurt once again?"

The desperation in my voice was evident and actually regretted that I ever spilled this out this in front of Akai, but his reaction surprised me enormously.

"Love can be sweet at times and bitter at the next."

I jerked my head up and looked at him after all the time I kept my eyes down, I was ready to be defensive, but he was quick to take over.

"Once again, I am human like you; although my demoniac appearance is contradicting it…I can understand the pain of a one-sided love."

Since it was useless to argue otherwise I gave in with a sigh. Akai removed the bandages from his face and sipped from his tea.

"So it's the silver-haired shinobi that you like?"

"W-w-what are you talking a-about!" I stammered defensively with a heated face.

I could tell he smiled against the tea cup. He set the cup back down and his gaze was fixed to the table.

"It's a unique feeling, isn't it? To be close to the person that you like, studying their speeches, looks and body features. The tempting sensation to be very close to that person that fires your system up with want and excitement. The passion to kiss that person, hold them and make love to them - is special. This gave me a sense to life." He spoke with genteel and compassion, which erased his demoniac features and I was moved about how he beautifully and caringly he spoke of this.

"I met the woman of my life outside the walls of my clan's residence. Since I was a boy I became bored inside my residence and tended to escape it and disguised myself as a villager to have fun. And one day when I was 18, I met her the first time when I saved her from some muggers. I gave my hand to help her up and soon as our hands touched it struck us both that we were actually destined for another. So each day I visited her, we talked, teased each other and played the most childish games. She was a simple but beautiful woman, who gave me courage and the feeling of being important and wanted. One could say she gave me a meaning to life. We knew that we wanted to be closer to each other and our first kiss was magical and breathe taking. Secretly we got married. We poured out our feelings over each other until we finally made love to each other. Afterwards she became pregnant and this unique feeling overwhelmed me the fact that I was going to be father! I assisted the birth of my son and no words could describe the happiness I shared with my wife! I only knew I was the most fortunate man alive to receive a son created by our love. I was moved to tears…" he told me his story with such care and detail, that the tears came to my eyes.

He described it with such compassion that it proved to me the power of love. All of a sudden his affectionate face darkens.

"However our happiness ended when my father found out about my marriage with my wife and the birth of my son. One day while I was out on family business, he captured her and my son and used them as experiments to test the power of the scroll." Akai told this with bitterness.

"I witnessed the horrifying power killing them slowly and painfully, their cries, screams and faces filled with agony haunt my every night. Out of desperation to save them, I accidentally came in contact with the scroll and was the only one who survived its destructive power. I was in the lowest pit of sadness and hatred, no human being could ever imagine. From that moment on I hated the entire clan. They killed my wife and son! What more could they take away from me! The demoniac power was weakening my conditions and since I refused to eat or drink or speak, my father decided to throw me out in the trash and renounce my very existence as his son."

"I lay there for days. Hatred, misery and depression seethed in my system, nurturing my demoniac powers and bringing me back on my feet. It resulted me to lose part of my human features and transform into this monster… This cursed monster that killed my wife and son!"

He panted heavily and rested his forehead against his hand to cover his miserable and desperate face. The tears came down in streams down my cheeks. And I thought my life was more difficult to his? My difficulty is nothing to compare with his and already my near suicide feels ridiculous to his life. How could a guy like this still live, although he suffered so much? He lost two precious people.

"My will to destroy this devil's scroll kept me going and I finally met a person willing to help me and it's you, Sara." He said sounding more hopeful, his face looking at me. I grabbed a hold of his hand and held it firmly.

"I promise I will help you, no matter what happens!" I declared with strong determination, which Akai responded with wide eyes.

After digesting my bold determination he closed his hand on mine and nodded with determination.

"Let's do it!"

"YEA!"

* * *


	22. Chapter 21

**Here's another chapter to save the day, yay!! -dancing around like a kid- I haven't been getting a lot of reviews lately from you guys, I guess y'all are busy with life, well I am kinda wishing my life would be busier and not to mention more...Interesting, he he -grins-. Anyway I'm writing another fanfic now, well technically I started it yesterday evening Sunday 5th October at 13 PM according to European time, it's a Detective Conan/Case Closed one with Shiratori as main character... Don't look at me like that okay, I don't what possessed me (probably my fascination for the voice actor which is KAKASHI'S VOICE!!) -cough- Anyhow I used some vocabulary which maybe some of you guys don't know. The suffix "dono" means like lord or your highness and I apologize in advance for my lack of knowledge in the traditional Japanese customs about kimono's and not to mention festive dishes which I believe many of you will notice. I kind of avoid putting too much detail in description of rooms, food and so on, for I hope the readers will use their imagination to create the perfect image of things. If any of you believe its too little detail please tell me, oki? /- reviews are always welcome.**

* * *

**CHAPTER TWENTY ONE**

- A cleverly dangerous plan -

Three whole days I stayed at Akai's place, we discussed and plotted a plan and he gave me some "manners" re-education. Like how women should behave in the medieval era with grace and dignity to express their beauty, how to speak politely and use flattery, how to walk with a kimono, how to put them one on and how to eat and finally all necessary manners needed to represent nobility and royalty…It was hell… Sleepless nights and low blood sugar level tortured me. Akai was proven to be such a strict teacher, Kakashi's teaching was nothing to compare and the worst was it was intensive lessons, meaning barely any breaks or time to breath! The trouble was that I got distracted during my lessons, my thoughts would automatically be with Kakashi. The same concerned questions, floated in my mind, where is he? What is he doing? Is he fine? Is he looking for me? Also guilt kept on hitting me, especially because I left him so suddenly and knocked him out to get him out of my way.

Finally the fourth day dawned, Akai made the last preparations for me and plus entrusted me with important information about the location of the scroll. From my point of view he was actually very enthusiastic of this plan and most importantly he was proud that he was finally taking some actions, doing something useful. It was amazing how much effort he put into his teaching and getting all necessary equipments for my mission, he even had to use some of the antics from his shop to decorate me to seem noble. The final preparation stretched out over the day and by nightfall I stood fully dressed in the most expensive and royal kimono I've ever seen in my life. I was covered in so many layers that I felt it made me look fat. The kimono was made of blue silk matching the blue of my eyes and harmonizing greatly with my blond hair which was tied in a mass and my pale skin. Beautiful flowery patterns stretched throughout the kimono, stitched in gold and silver. I stared with fascination at my transformed appearance, from a shinobi to a Japanese royalty. Akai was very proud of his master piece. All the necessary preparation was done and before the commencement of the real mission, Akai called me to the table and we sat down.

"You've got everything you need?"

"Yes, I do."

"Good."

He had poured some of his famous tea in our cups and we took a sip of it. Tension roamed in the room. A big challenge was at our door step and it demanded for cunningness, vigilance and improvising. As Akai put his cup back on the table, he looked at me, tension and anxiety was in his eyes and I was certain that my eyes reflected the same.

"Tonight is the big night…You must be aware that you may expect the worst. Like I told you, my clan is unpredictable; you have to be quick, cunning and clever as them…"

Then he gave me a warm smile.

"All the effort, perseverance that you have invested into this preparation makes me proud of you and I'm convinced that you'll be successful without a doubt."

I looked at him surprised yet moved at his words, it was the first time anybody ever said this to me. He showed no doubt or hesitation, he fully relied on me and it strengthened my will to succeed in this and free him from this curse. So this is how a true master-pupil relationship was, or no a father-daughter relationship. This moment became a treasured memory stored in my mind to encourage me to go on. I bowed down respectfully to him.

"Thank you; you have been a great master."

His hand leaned across the table and raised my chin.

"No need to be like this, it's I who must thank you. I've never met such a determined, strong minded and good willed person like you, Sara. I wish all people could be like you, have a sense of justice and heart to help those in need."

He pulled his hand away and just smiled at me. I wish I could hear more people expressing such reliance on me, was that what I was lacking? Feeling appreciated and noticed for my efforts? The tears brimmed in my eyes and I lowered my face, the tears rolled down my cheeks and splattered over the table.

"Akai, I must thank you for believing in me, for perceiving my efforts and accepting me for who I am. You are the only person so far who managed to understand my true self without questioning, without getting suspicious and without persecuting me. You have become my first and closest friend since I arrived in the shinobi world. Please, accept my gratitude."

His hand once more raised my chin and he scooted over.

"Sara, don't cry, it's the wrong time and the wrong moment and most of all you're making your face look ugly." He brothered me around and wiped my face dry with his sleeve.

I was not used to getting babied, but it felt greatly reassuring and it soothed me. He brought the cup to my face to encourage me to drink out of it and I complied.

"Be strong Sara, you'll need it to resist and endure things. After all you'll become a bride."

The word "bride" squeezed my heart and Akai got up to collect the tray and the cups and brought it to the kitchen. I slowly got up and clenched my trembling fists. What will happen to me, if I go on pretending to love a man that I don't? Will those feelings for Kakashi extinguish like those from Steve's? What happens if I'm forced to make love to this stranger?

"What's wrong, Sara…Are you hesitating?" he asked me calmly, though with compassion.

My fists trembled, the pain was unbearable and I spun to him.

"I'm not hesitating!" I croaked, my voice swallowed by emotions and I was shocked of how I sounded.

"How could I pretend to love a man that I don't! Won't it extinguish my feelings for the one I love? What happens to me if I have to make love to him?"

Akai instinctively got a firm grip of my shoulders and spoke with a strong voice.

"Sara, don't throw away all this determination or effort! That's the risk you must take, haven't you thought about it?"

"Of course I did! But my feelings are growing so strong and are longing for him! I just know it'll ruin this mission! I cannot lock out those feelings, my heart won't let me!"

"You don't have to! Treasure them! Keep them, don't you ever give up on them! As long as you love him, those feelings will prevail and overcome any obstacles!" he stated sternly giving a mild shake to my body.

"I know you love him, but for your sanity, you must conceal it in your heart, it's evident that you may come in such a situation. Keeping a cool and emotionless attitude may help you in some circumstances, but sometimes you have to be submissive."

The things he said to me, was like a shower of needles against my heart, but I had no choice, there was no turning back or hesitation. I must endure hardship in order to free the clan from this curse. I must be strong, I must!

"Do you want me to get your companion to accompany you?"

I jumped out of his grip and exclaimed defensively.

"No! He'll be a distraction and an obstacle; most importantly I won't have the courage to look at him in the face. Please Akai; promise me you won't tell him anything of this plan."

Akai stood there, looking at me and then he nodded with reassurance.

"I promise that I won't say a word."

I looked at him, verifying if he really was going to hold his word. Then I took a deep breath.

"I'm ready, let's go."

Akai nodded and I followed him through another door, which lead to us to a tight hallway. We winded up in front of a door, directed to the street, which was at the corner before turning into Fuhei's street. Akai opened the door a split and peered to check if anybody was there. He let me out, the village was submerged in fog and the clouds rumbled over our heads. Not a soul was on the streets; even the lights were unusually dim. Akai handed me an ancient umbrella from the medieval and when I wanted to take it, his hand remained firmly gripped against it.

"Be careful, Sara. If you are in trouble, I'll always cover your back."

Words did not express it, but I looked at him, communicating with my eyes the gratitude and the determination to get this done. He released his hand from the umbrella and I opened it. The rain began to drizzle down strongly and Akai gave me one last glance and closed the door. I walked slowly along the corner and turned in to the street passing in front of the bleached walls of the Fuhei residence. My heart was beating fast out of anxiety and my steps echoed against the emptiness, it felt like my last march to death. As I stood in front of the oak doors, I raised my hand and banged my fist rhythmically against it. The knocks echoed within and after a brief pause, the gates began to creak open and I stepped in.

Two guards accompanied me to the entrance of the main house; it looked like an imperial palace, only that it was reduced in size and width. The courtyard was adorned with healthy greens and magnificent cherry blossom trees, which obviously would show its beauty on a warm and beautiful day. As we reached the wooden steps to stand on the porch, the guards pulled the sliding door open and I stepped in. I took off my shoes and walked on the shiniest floors in my life, only nobility possessed such grandeur. The hallway was long and wide, fit for a stampede of animals to run through and the ceilings were high. Everything was tidy and decorated with the best hand carved furnitures any nobility could possess. The building remained warm and enjoyable; except that my heart felt like it could give out any minute. The guard in front of me led me to a door; he slid the door open and let me step in. The guards stayed outside, I took a deep breath and grabbed all my resolves and went deeper into the room.

I looked inside the room, an empty and wide lane stretched out in front of me and along that wide lane sat elderly men and younger ones on cushions and all of them had their attention directed to a central figure. A fat man bearing a scornful, pretentious and arrogant face. He looked like a typical man that was greedy for power. He sat on the best cushions available and on an elevated podium, marking his superiority to all his followers. Clearly he was the infamous leader of the clan. There was a general discussion between the front rows but by a loud cough, all talking ceased and the attention of the entire room was directed to me. It was my cue and I walked in calmly, keeping my cool in front of the staring gazes. When I was close enough, I bowed down completely, like I was paying my respects to a God. I came back to my full height.

"Fuhei dono, my name is Haburashi Yuki, I come from Yukigakure and I seek your approval to become your son's bride." I introduced myself with such formality and respect that I seemingly stunned everybody with awe.

The whole room itself was disbelieved of my statement. The fat guy's brow arched high in interest but he resolved to laugh with conceit.

"Ha ha! How interesting, a mere girl from Yukigakure dressed up in royalty comes ask for my son's hand, how strange is that."

The room joined in laughter with him. It pricked my nerves, but thank God I had a good teacher who taught me not to lose my temper against those idiots. I waited patiently the room to calm down.

"Do you expect with such an introduction to become my son's bride? You haven't presented yourself in - high and appropriate standards-"

"Yes, Fuhei dono, as respectable and noble as you are, I'm aware that you meet a higher expectation and gifts from me."

"This woman is interesting and certainly knows how to use flattery, but let me warn you that flattery does not convince me otherwise." He spoke with arrogance.

"I know that my words will not convince you, but can I ask you to accept this letter?" I spoke with formality and pulled out a letter, which bore a seal out of wax and presented to him in a bow.

His advisor took the letter opened it and passed it to his master. The fat guy began to read it. There was a moment of silence. Tension seems to reign in the room, as all attention was focused on the fat guy. I observed his eyes skimming the letter, from being passive he gradually took some interest in it and as he finished it, his voice echoed.

"Everybody is dismissed."

Everybody complied at his orders, the room emptied quickly and silently. As everybody was gone until only his advisor and I were left, he spoke up.

"You say you come from Yukigakure."

"Yes, Fuhei dono."

"So you've escaped a massacre of your clan and are following the will of your father to marry my son?"

"Yes."

"What is his reason?"

"Fuhei dono, my father was a great man such as you, who enjoyed wealth and power. We were the strongest clan in the Snow village, however other clans began to compete with us and it resulted to a blood bath. I, the only survivor of the famous Haburashi clan, desire to follow my father's will and produce powerful offspring's to make your clan victorious and powerful."

I bowed to show my sincerity and respect.

"I will fully devote myself to this clan."

"Why is that I haven't heard of this famous clan of yours?"

I gave a smile to him and replied charmingly.

"We were a proud clan that took care of our identity and contained our popularity within our country. We possess a gift that was passed down from generations to generations."

The fat guy sat up, instantly interested by my so-called gift.

"What kind of gift is this?" he questioned with interest and I walked up to him and whispered in his ear.

"A demon."

I pulled back and went back to my position. His eyes were wide with disbelief.

"Is this true?" he questioned me doubtfully.

I nodded.

"Where is the proof?" he then demanded and I gave a smile and chuckled, like it was a joke.

"Oh Fuhei dono, you are amusing. If I would bring forth the demon, all of you would be dead."

The advisor, who shuddered at my statement, alarmingly went over to whisper at his master. However the fat guy, looked at me, interest marked in his attitude and he wasn't paying attention to his advisor.

"Be still!" he shouted to his advisor, who shrunk back fearfully.

The fat guy looked at me, his chin resting on his hand and looking at me with interest.

I came up to him and once again whispered in his ear.

"Imagine, when I produce some offspring's not only will they look beautiful but they will inherit my power and merge with your son's power. Now imagine how powerful and invincible they will become."

"Your clan will be renowned for its power and no sooner you may take the place as Mizukage."

I pulled back and gave him some distance. The man was falling for my act and I received the confirmation when he announced.

"I like her, a beautiful but fiery young woman will surely interest my son."

I bowed down lowly to him, showing my respect and gratitude.

"I pledge from here forth I will serve your house and bear you many powerful children, devoted to this clan." I pledged with seriousness and stood at my full height.

The man caught the bait and he announced with delight.

"Call for the servants to bring her to her room and as you are the bride-to-be of my son, I will invite you for the best dinner prepared by the best cooks of our clan."

I bowed down humbly.

"Thank you for your hospitality, Fuhei dono and it's my greatest pleasure to assist you at such an occasion."

The fat guy got up and clapped his hands enthusiastically.

"My son will arrive tomorrow; we will arrange a formal meeting, so please enjoy your stay."

He left the room and from behind me came a group of servants. I followed them all along until we stopped at one door, they pulled it open and I gaped in wonder. It was a room fit for a princess! It was spacious, filled with beautiful furniture's and comfortable chairs. Everything seemed to have been arranged for the bride. The words cannot describe the room's grandeur and beauty, only that I felt really exaggeratingly pampered. The gloss of the furniture's, the wide bed, the warmth and the royalty was amazing, above my wildest dreams! Of course, I'm not exaggerating the things here, if I'm blown over by the beauty and the high standards of this room, than you better take me serious! I walked in, observing with rapture the beauty of the room.

"Mistress, do you need anything?" asked one female servant humbly and I waved my hand off, expressing that I didn't need anything.

"No it's fine. You may retreat, I need to settle down." I added calmly and the servant bowed.

"Does mistress desire that we call you for dinner?"

"Yes, please."

With another bow the servant left and the others as well. I took a tour of the room and dropped my things near to my bed. I continued my inspection, where I suddenly noticed a group of sliding doors at the far end of the room; curiously I opened one of them and discovered a balcony. As I looked over the heavy wooden railings, I noticed that I was on the third floor and also that I had a clear view over the walls and more precisely to the antic shop of Akai. With concentration I searched for Akai's appearance, but his place as usual looked lifeless. I wanted to give a sign of my successful infiltration. All of a sudden I saw the curtains flicker at one of Akai's windows. I watched his place hopeful for a sign, then I saw something, a flicker of candle light behind the curtains and it was making some movements, grabbing my attention. Even though it was so dim for the human eye especially at this weather, I could see it. The light that shone through the curtain was a sign of Akai. Then the light disappeared and the curtain was partially pulled open, I couldn't see his face nor a presence it was too dark for my eyes, I narrowed my eyes and all of a sudden I saw in black and white! I stepped back startled of my night vision. It took me a moment to regain my composure and I concentrated hardly to his window that was partially exposed. I could actually see him! He noticed I was looking at him and seemed quite surprised. He gave me a worried face and I responded with a discrete thumb up and a determined smirk. He sighed in relief and then raised his fist, to show determination and to be strong. I replied to him with the same movement and nodded. One last time I glanced around me, checking if anybody saw me, everything was quiet, only the tapping of the rain against the roof was the only sound. I turned away and left the balcony and closed the sliding door behind me. I decided to take a further tour of my room, since I haven't finished inspecting it.

A room for a queen would be the right term for this room. I had everything I needed! My own bathroom, which looked like a spa, a dressing room, an enormous cupboard filled with kimonos and other things, a living room which was sorta built in with my bedroom. I could spend here for days to discover more things. I sat down in front of a dresser which had a mirror built and checked on the make up and other accessories they've laid out for me. Gosh! I could spend here trying out different styles the whole day! Light knocks against the door, brought me out of my state of reverie and fascination. I called out clearly.

"Yes, come in."

The door opened a bit and a servant came in, she bowed.

"My master is expecting you at the dinning room."

"Thank you."

I got up and walked over to the servant and she guided me to the dinning room.

After going down several stairs and passing through many grand and long hallways, we turned into one wide open room. It was filled with a banquet and the people were seated on cushions on the floor. The table was adorned with various plates of sushi's', sea fruits, rice, meat, vegetables and anything you could imagine that could make your mouth water! The lobster displayed on the plate was the centre of attention. Many elders and some in their middle age were grouped along the table and watched me pass bye to be directed to my seat, which was next to the head of the table, Fuhei dono. As I sat down and was welcomed by a pleased facial expression from my so-called Father in law, he cleared his throat loudly to silence the room and stood up.

"As you may have noticed, I have invited you all for a special dinner tonight to announce you great news." He declared with enthusiasm.

Everybody looked at the leader with anticipation.

"This woman," he indicated and gave his hand to me which I took and stood up next to him.

"Haburashi san will become my son's wife."

A crowd of applause and cheers erupted, it seems like none disagreed about his decision and I most certainly believe that his power made everybody submit to any of his statements. All of a sudden as I looked in the crowd, I did not spot any women. It shocked to some extent, how could the women be absent at such an important event? Then reality gave me a horrible cold chill down my spine, the cursed scroll! It must've killed them off entirely; the only female in this place was me and the maids. Anyway I must focus here, smile be charming! Then we sat down and the true feast began.

The feast went on until the early morning, around 1 AM and finally the people started retreating for the night. I never ate such delicious and luxurious food in my life, not to mention the taste was sublime! Since it was so delicious, I've over fed myself and I felt like puking everything back out, so I humbly ask permission from my "father-in-law" to retire for the night.

"Have you liked the feast?"

"Yes, it was splendid. Fuhei's cooking surpasses all cooking."

"Of course, I've got the best of the best."

I chuckled and got up and bowed once again to show my gratitude.

"Fuhei dono, I better retire for the night, my trip to Kiri was strenuous and I feel very exhausted and light headed."

"Yes, please go and rest as much as you want. The maid will wake you up for breakfast. Have a good rest and good night."

I bowed once more and bade him a good sleep and left the room accompanied by a servant. I recalled some members had stayed back and I was sure it was about their disagreement against me becoming Ronen's bride. Still I was disbelieved that I actually managed to infiltrate, without suspicion. There was this reassuring confidence growing in me, I knew that the fat guy would reject his followers disapprovals. Gosh my head is killing me! Finally I reached my room. The maid quickly showed my bed attires and no sooner left the room as I ordered her to do. I undressed myself from this hundred-laired kimono to put a thin Yukata on made of silk that was nicely folded on my gigantic bed. Wow, how nice the silk felt against my skin! I skipped to the bathroom to find everything prepared for a bath or a shower; anyway I just wanted to wash my face and brush my teeth and jump to bed. I walked into the grand marbled bathroom and washed my face with the most expensive products which made my face soft as a baby's butt! I brushed my teeth and no sooner landed on the softest bed on earth! In an instant I fell asleep. For once I found peace,ot worry neither fear or regret nor longing or sorrow, I was sleeping with a blank mind, and Kakashi's face was stored away.

My first day, was pleasant. I was woken up nicely when the maids opened the balcony windows to let the sun pour into my room. I was served breakfast in bed on a tray filled with a large breakfast at my choice and then the main maid, who was responsible for me came up to me.

"Mistress, its noon. I've received orders from my master that we must prepare you for younger master's arrival in the late afternoon."

I looked up to the maid

"After you finished, we will begin with your bath."

"My bath?!"

"Oh yes mistress, you must look your best when young master comes back. After all you are his bride-to-be." Her last sentence sounded so enthusiastic that myself I felt discomforted by it.

After finishing my breakfast I was submitted to the most humiliating task ever! Strip down in front of the maids, let them scrub practically every part of my body and receive the most embarrassing, disturbing compliments about my body. Examples are… Not worth giving! However one compliment remained stuck in my mind, while I sat rotting in the bathtub and the younger maids busily scrubbing my legs and back and giggling excitedly like some sort of tea party around the bathtub "With that body of yours I'm sure you'll please young master easily." Okay, what else, don't tell me the size of my ass would knock him off of his feet!

Until the afternoon I was forced to endure all sorts of nonsense! From getting my skin scrubbed off raw, to getting dressed up into the most rigid and uncomfortable kimono in my entire life and sitting for several to get some bloody make up and hair done! I wanted to complain, whine, stamp, shout and break everything and scream at the people to leave me alone! Already in one day I was growing to hate my decision. For God's sake leave me alone! The minutes and hours flew by like a whole year! And what kept on pricking my nerves was that I had to act as if it was some "daily" thing to me, which obviously wasn't! While those tormenting hours dragged by, I was finally left in peace and could sit quietly somewhere in my room, assured to remain undisturbed and motionless.

However the peaceful time was interrupted and already the maid came to fetch me. I was obliged to follow her down to another room; we stood in front of the sliding doors leading to this room. A lyrical and unique music emitted from the room, it was beautiful, it sounded like the harp only that it was accompanied by other calm instruments. When the maid opened the sliding door I found out, that three people played three different oriental instruments. One played the harp, another strange looking instrument that produced metallic sounds similar to a Koto and another one a wooden flute. They played in unison and such harmony that I felt enchanted and hypnotised by the sound of its beauty. A table was placed in the centre of the room and not so far from the band sat the leader with his eyes shut, enjoying the music.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" questioned the leader all of a sudden.

I met him looking at me with a proud face, I nodded and went over to the table and sat down across of him. For a moment he scanned my appearance and then gladly added.

"My servants did a marvellous job on you, I'm quite sure my son will like you."

"Thank you very much, Fuhei dono, I do hope that I meet your sons expectation."

"Certainly! Who would have ever thought that such a beautiful blossom would come to my residence and ask my son's hand in marriage?" he stated with confidence and seemed quite pepped up with enthusiasm and excitement.

Myself I felt a bit nervous, because if I fail to satisfy Ronen it'll be a problem to get closer to the scroll and accomplish my mission. The music kept on playing and there was a brief pause between us, then he quickly added.

"My son should be arriving soon, why don't you dance for me?"

My lungs squeezed unpleasantly.

"I beg your pardon?" I repeated with incredulity.

"Please, dance for me."

I quickly recapitulated and tried to make him change his mind.

"Oh, Fuhei dono, I'm really not talented with dancing."

"Oh, nonsense, all women are good at it."

"Well, not me."

"Still I insist." He ordered firmly and since he remained quite stubborn at his decision, I gave in and stood up.

I knew how to dance, Akai had prepared me well for this, but I thought the traditional dance was a bit, how to say, lame and boring… Also the music was depressing. Since I had taken ballet for several years, I thought maybe I could combine some of the moves with that. I distanced myself from the table and the leader and stood there ready to perform. When the leader raised his hand, the instruments stopped playing.

"I want you to play that song for her so that she could dance to it." He ordered and the instrument players complied and looked at me, waiting for my signal.

"Can I listen to this song before I dance?" I asked the fat guy.

He didn't show any objection and let the instrument players play. I took a deep breath, and meditated with my eyes shut, trying to listen to the music and picture some movements in my head. Still with my eyes shut, my body began to feel the rhythm and let it bathe into the beauty of this music. I found myself dancing with passion and grace that I brought the leader to gape at my performance. By twirling in circles, hands flowing in the rhythm accompanied with little and light steps, I could conquer the whole attention of the room. Since I realized the impact of my performance, it boosted my confidence which then encouraged me to dance in the entire room. I never felt so engulfed by music in my life before, I could freely dance to it, normally it would take me some long mental preparation for that but this time I let the rhythm move my body. The music was so moving and yet melancholic, a typical song composed by a person who knows pain over the loss of somebody dearest to them. I danced on and on, gracefully and gently, expressing the nostalgia in the music. As I twirled I noticed some people had assembled around the entrance of them room, also staring at me agape in wonder. Amongst them there was a striking young man who stared at me, as if it was the first time he saw such a thing, he was easily distinguished from the crowd through his slender and dignified appearance, which he seemingly did not inherit from his father. Our eyes met, I felt my heart thump and twirled around to look away from him, shocked that I reacted this way. His gaze was penetrative. I turned around dancing in front of him and glancing at him from time to time.


	23. Chapter 22

**Heya!! My fellow readers!! I noticed many of you put me down as favourtie author or alert story or author and I'm kinda hoping that some of you will give me some proper review, "please update" is a bit poor, u know what I'm saying? Even a sentence makes me very happy, a paragraph makes me happier and a whole page or an essay will make me burst with happiness and joy!! Of course i am still grateful to all you guys who review, I am not complaining. Now I present you the next chapter, as usual, hope you enjoy and make you smile!! /- reviews always welcome and if you are confused and you need some clarification, please just ask, oki? Tadaaaaaaaaaaaaa, here's the next chapie!!**

* * *

**CHAPTER TWENTY TWO**

- Ronen the prince charming -

For some reason, as our gazes met I felt a magical moment was exchanged between us. Like a certain invisible bond was created only by a gaze into each other's eyes. It was a memorable and unique moment. The young man with the distinguished elegance, handsome and romantic features, would be considered by all girls point of view as the medieval Japanese prince charming. His silk raven hair, tied in a pony tail cascaded down his chest. Myself I was enchanted by his beauty too. His appearance did emit a mysterious aura, which teased my curiosity mercilessly. The music began to slow down and it gradually came to an end, so as my dance. There was a moment of silence filled with staring eyes filled with fascination and wonder. The leader was the first to break the silence by clapping whole heartedly; I turned to him, somehow stunned of his reaction and unsure how to react. For once that greasy old guy, showed a more fatherly side instead of displaying that greedy and arrogant nature of his. Gradually all joined the clapping and cheering, even the instrument players, only Ronen remained perplexed of my performance. I bathed in my glory and expressed my gratitude through many bows and smiles. The clapping and cheering died away and finally the fat guy noticed his son and called him in.

"Ah, Ronen, come in. I want to announce the great news."

Ronen seemed to have regained himself and walked into the room. Before even saying a word to his father he turned to me and expressed his admiration for my dancing.

"All my compliments you danced beautifully, it's a vision of perfection."

I was extremely flattered about his compliments which I responded with a humble bow.

"Thank you, Fuhei sama."

As I came back to my full height, my heart made a start when his eyes looked so intensively in mine. I diverted my gaze quite promptly, feeling on one hand guilty and on the other embarrassed. His attention was back on his father and he sat beside his father. I sat down across of them.

"How have you been father?"

"Quite well." He answered curtly.

The way they conversed was in a very formal way, sons showing respect to the father and usually not the opposite, very typical in royal families. I could tell the lack of intimacy and suppression of emotions. Only both men exchanged grave facial expressions. After a brief pause, the leader cleared his throat.

"Ronen, this is Haburashi Yuki and Haburashi san this is my son Ronen."

I inclined my head to show the delight of meeting him.

"As you may have noticed, she is a true beauty and her dance has confirmed us this fact."

Ronen listened while looking at me, keeping a cool face.

"She will become your bride."

After a shocking pause, Ronen instantly jumped up, nearly knocking over the table and expressed his discontent.

"Why do you arrange things without consulting me? You cannot impose this woman on me, only because "she is a true beauty"! I want to marry out of love!"

"Ronen, watch your tongue!" snapped his father back at him and he looked over to me giving a nervous apologetic face.

"Don't listen to him Haburashi san. He feels unwell-

-I do feel well! But I simply disagree with this arrangement!" He interrupted his father sharply.

I was stunned of Ronen's feisty nature which contradicted his soft nature, especially towards strangers, but it seems that this topic has been for some time a sensitive area. The worst thing was I could feel empathy towards his outburst, who wouldn't marry out of love. While they glared at each other, I smiled to myself and gently stood up. The leader was instantly aware of it and quickly added.

"Haburashi, please list-"

I raised my hand to show him to stop speaking. I smiled at them both.

"Fuhei dono, as a father you must consider your sons feelings, isn't he you're only son and don't you wish his happiness?"

The leader was appalled of my statement, but seemed to reconsider after he heard the last words. I didn't pay any attention to Ronen, since my focus was on the father.

"I share the same wish as your son's; please give him sometime to think over, I can wait. It was nice meeting you, Ronen Sama and thank you for the music Fuhei dono." After I said this I bowed and left the room quietly.

I walked back to my room with the paces quickening. I burst into the room and closed the door shut and stripped myself from my kimono to put some comfortable and stretchy attire. I sunk into my bed and sighed to the ceiling. This was going to get more complicated than expected, what should I do, wait or seduce him? I fell back on my bed and groaned while rubbing the exhaustion out of my eyes; I didn't want to do any of it! My patience was short and neither did I have the want to seduce a guy that I didn't love. DAMN! Can't I just get the scroll and finish the job!

I jumped out of my bed, slipped a Yukata on and walked out of the room. Whining and complaining in my room was the least thing to do! I wanted to first have a tour of my new residence; after all, it was a bright sunny day. I walked along the hallways, down the stairs and through the main hall way and out of the house. Since there was some kind of hallway exteriorly of the house, surrounding the house like a porch, I decided to walk around the house. As I came behind the house, rows of cherry blossom trees surrounded the perimeter like a pink fence, it seemed like spring.

The Cherry blossoms were in full bloom and the soil underneath them was strewn with pink petals and other blossoms. The greens in this residence were well kept. No withering or dying plants were seen. I took a deep breath from the warm breeze which tickled and teased my face and hair. I went back to the entrance to take my slippers, slipped them on and went over to one of the oldest and grand cherry blossom trees. I kneeled and picked some of the cherry blossoms that were still intact and with my hands I formed a bowl. I looked down into my collection with marvel. I smiled to myself, gosh how beautiful they are, not to mention the colour pink and its indescribable beauty! In Europe you don't find such beauty, maybe you find the white cherry blossoms, except that these in my hands were magnificent.

"What are you doing?"

My head jerked up and I met Ronen standing on the porch, looking at me with confusion and a raised brow. Why is he so damn handsome, in whatever pose he makes?! I turned away from him and looked up to the branches full of blooming blossoms.

"I'm admiring the blossoms." I replied with content as I gazed to the blossoms, my heart was thumping quickly in my chest, what in God's name was wrong with me?!

I heard him move away and I exhaled in relief, gosh I'm behaving the way I'm not supposed to! Dammit, I should be a spoiled brat, descending from a prestigious clan and ignorant of nature's beauty, I should be a damn snob!

"Whatever, I don't see anything interesting about those blossoms." Erupted his voice behind me, giving me a start and causing me to spill all the blossoms on the ground.

Reflexively he kneeled down and begun picking up the blossoms, I joined with him.

"Pardon me if I sound rude, but you don't appear to descend from such a prestigious clan in Yukigakure."

"What do you mean?" I asked him with interest and he seemed quite uncomfortable or even afraid to offend me.

"I know it's the first time we met, but your behaviour from before and now, aren't those of a princess."

I was quite surprised of his observation, was there maybe some hope after all? I presume that only if you are interested in someone you pay extra attention to their behaviour; on the other hand it made me nervous that he was able to perceive this.

"You mean my behaviour doesn't resemble a spoiled brat?"

Ronen paused in his action and glanced at me nervously, gosh he looked so cute! Like a little boy afraid to commit a mistake and offend the person. I burst out in laughter and he looked at me more bewildered than ever and somewhat insulted.

"It's so adorable the face you made, ha ha ha! You look like a kid."

"I'm not a kid!" he protested "I'm 20."

Even that response made me grin, he was physically very mature however he had some childish traits, which he desperately hid behind that all too serious face of his. I pinched his cheeks and stretched them.

"Don't be too serious, you'll get some wrinkles, laugh a bit it feels good." I encouraged him cheerfully.

He gripped my hands, removed them from his cheeks with disapproval and put them down.

"I don't need to listen to you; I know what's good for me-

- To suppress your true feelings?"

He looked at me appalled of my response, but then his solemn face metled into a smile of interest.

"You sure love picking fights."

"Yep, I do, especially with people with "that" kind of face." I imitated his face, in a maybe exaggerating way, because Ronen's face was turning red barely containing his laughter for any longer.

Finally his laughter slipped out of his mouth, it felt like he hadn't laughed in a long time. After his laugh had settled down, he looked at me cheerfully.

"I think you are the first person in 12 years that brought me to laugh like that."

"Good, I'm proud of my success as an entertainer."

We exchanged chuckles and we stood up and sat on the porch. While we sat there staring in front of us, I talked to him.

"Regarding your statement, it's true I'm not so spoiled and snobbish as I appear…"

I began to tell a story of lies to him and it pained me to do so, but if I wanted to get this scroll I must lie and cheat in order to attain it. I have to appear melancholic.

"After I fled the massacre of my clan, I travelled through various countries to reach Kiri. I think this agony and solitude that I bore throughout the journey was worthwhile, because it gave me time to contemplate over my life and my purpose. One could say a light of hope has directed me to Kiri."

There was a moment of silence, where only the wind whirred through the trees, rustling it through and blowing the loose blossoms into the wind.

"Were there any survivors?" he asked with precaution and I shook my head without looking at him.

"Not a single and the worst of all, I sat there helplessly watching them all get slaughtered in front of my eyes."

"I'm sorry." He apologized feeling empathetic about it and I pushed myself off the porch and stood on the ground.

"Don't feel sorry for me, they died, I can't bring them back to life, but I carry them as memory in my heart, so I'm not too sad." I said cheerfully.

Ronen looked at me, somewhat unconvinced about my statement; melancholy was visible in his body language and his eyes.

"How can you still smile, if you lost all your relatives and close friends?" he questioned me suddenly in a grave tone.

My heart thumped against my chest in anxiety, I have to be careful not to act so casual about the death of my so-called clan. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

"I understand what you mean, but it would cause me tremendous pain if I would continue to mourn over their deaths. Of course I long for them and miss them, but I don't want to become an old withered woman filled with sorrow and resentment, I will live on with my life, keeping those memories close to my heart. Anyway I've got no tears left to shed for them anymore."

I think I would have cried at this part, wow Sara, you're such a dramatist! Even I was amazed how I could act this out without experiencing it once. Ronen kept an empathetic face, the things I said affected him deeply and I patted his shoulder.

"Ah, don't feel sad for me that's the least I want, making people cry over my loss."

I looked at Ronen, tilting my head from side to another and calling to Ronen in a comforting tone.

"Ronen, Ronen, don't be sad. Smile, come on, smile." I cheered him up and a smile crept over his face.

"Sorry if I reacted like this, I'm just moved of how you can see your life with optimism and hope after such a loss."

More stings of guilt pierced my heart, my conscience was yelling to me to stop being so dishonest, but I had to go on, I had to conquer his heart and made him lead me to the scroll.

"Believe me after such a journey, many good things and bad things happen that strengthened me and motivated me." Which is in part true, the journey in the Naruto gave me confidence and self-esteem, even hope that life isn't that bad, especially if love is the boost.

"Since we're talking of deep stuff, why don't you say something about yourself?" I asked him

"I think I would prefer to know about you first."

I frowned and took a deep breath and began to tell another lie about my life.

"I was born in the Haburashi clan in Yukigakure, my mother died at my birth and my father was the leader and I was going to be the predecessor since all my relatives were unqualified to do so. I was pressured and taught by the best and didn't have a carefree childhood as I hoped I would have. So as a result, I disguised myself and sneaked out of my home and played with the kids in neighbourhood. Until I was a teenager I did this and finally my Father caught me red-handed, got me several guards to keep me in the residence, I was lucky though that some of them were nice enough to play with me, so it wasn't too boring. Also by nature I was quite boyish, I escaped all the boring girl duties such as sewing, cooking and all that dumb stuff."

"So you actually cross-dressed?" he asked me with disbelief and immensely interested, which made me look at him.

"Yea, I did." I defended my action with pride.

"However as a girl becomes a woman she can't hide anything anymore…Ah, those were the days." I sighed reminiscing of the old times.

"That sounds like a relative of mine, he was crazy enough to disguise himself and leave all the family business behind."

"Really?" I inquired with interest.

"Actually I admired him quite a lot and I took his example to marry out of love."

"Oh, really, tell me about him."

I had some presentiment of whom he was talking about, but still I was curious what he thought about him.

"Ever since he was a teenager he used to disguise and sneak out of the clan to have some fun. I noticed he went several times, I was fifteen at that time and he was 25. It was discovered that he was seeing a village girl and actually made her pregnant. I was quite amazed how he could fall in love with a woman from a different social class. I only begun to understand him when his wife and son died, I finally understood how much he loved them and it moved me so much. The loss of his wife and child caused his death. I long for the same love that he experienced."

I was amazed myself about his admiration for Akai, but he clearly left out so many details and I feel that Akai did so too, because who leaked the information out about the pregnancy of his wife? For the moment I did not want to inquire, since this guy in front of me was saying deep things which I doubt that he ever shared to anybody. I sat back on the porch.

"Woa, such a courageous and loving man, I can understand your admiration for him, his wife must've been the luckiest woman alive."

"Yea, I can imagine that and he must've been the luckiest man on earth."

A moment of silence roamed between us and we gazed to the blue sky.

I began to chuckle with ridicule and he looked over at me.

"What's so funny?"

"We are speaking about the lamest things such as Death and Love, it makes me always depressed."

"I can't agree more with you." Answered Ronen with amusement.

"Let's walk, maybe you can show me around this place." I suggested and he stood up on the porch and nodded.

"Okay, I'll show you around then." He agreed with delight.

I smiled at him and ran to the steps and took off my slippers and walked over to him. We walked along another, while he gave me a tour of the place and talked about the various things about the houses. Also we spoke about other things. Finally after making the tour around the house, I noticed the porch leading to another smaller building, carrying the Fuhei insignia at the entrance. I was sure it was a dojo and for some reason I sensed some odd aura around that building. As I had stopped in the middle, Ronen came to me and asked.

"What's wrong, are you unwell?"

I shook my head without looking at him; my gaze remained transfixed to the dojo. Ronen followed my gaze and he noticed it with amusement.

"This is the Dojo, in there we train, do you want to have a look at it?"

I looked at him my eyes wide with curiosity and he led me to the Dojo. He opened the wooden handle, locking the door and pushed the thin creaking door open. An empty and spacious room stretched out in front of us, the floor was made of polished wood and the walls were made of worn wood, marking its ancientness. I walked in and twirled in a circle to look at the entire room. It was so cool! In each corner candles were lit to illuminate the room and it gave certain warmth to this room.

"Wow, so cool!" I praised and Ronen chuckled.

"Stop acting like you never saw a Dojo, I'm sure you had one too."

"Of course I did! Only that this one is prettier." I defended myself rather quickly with my arms crossed over my chest, which I'm sure he was suspicious about and turned away from him with a huff.

"Actually do you know how to fight?" he asked me and I froze in my actions.

Shit! I never thought about that! If I show I can fight that'll be a problem! I have to pretend to be a helpless damsel in distress - which I obviously hate – this would erase any suspicion. I turned around and shook my head, as if he asked me an appalling question.

"No way! I don't, violence doesn't solve things it makes them worse."

"What about if you want to defend yourself?"

"A good bite and kick in the groin will suffice." I said while imitating the moves.

Ronen had to laugh at my response, gosh if Kakashi would be here he'd make fun of me the whole day! I sound so lame and childish, but hey I have to risk all my reputation to improvise, even if it resorts to lies.

""A good bite and a kick in the groin" won't always suffice, what about if your attacker approaches you with a sword or a knife?"

"Well then, Uhm, I, Uhm…Will scream." I stammered and concluded as a matter-factly, which made Ronen laugh even more.

Now I sound like a retarded person, please somebody shoot me!

"You sure take life naively, anything can happen, you know."

"I'm not naïve! I'm idealistic and optimistic of life, not naïve!" I defended and crossed my arms over my chest and pouted like an offended child.

Ronen chuckled with amusement, I was so happy that I could bring him to laugh, but most importantly he looked so cute and ten times more handsome when he smiled.

"Maybe one day I'll teach you how to defend yourself, I guess for a woman its important to know this, especially if their attacker is a man." He said and diverted his gaze, seeming to be embarrassed how much concern he feels towards me.

I was glad to hear this and this gave me some hope that the mission will be a success.

"Should we start with the first lesson?" he questioned me and alarmingly I waved my hands in front of him.

"No, no, no! Not today maybe, another time would be suitable."

Ronen pulled an amused smile, but he seemed like he was hoping that we were going to train. I turned away from him and all of a sudden, something attracted my immediate attention. In the far left hand corner of the room, on a small table which carried a special stand held an ancient scroll covered in mildew. It emitted some strange aura. My response was to walk over there, but before I could get any closer, I was roughly pulled back by a pincer grip in my arm. I was met with Ronen's scowl.

"Don't ever get close to this!" he warned me firmly and the grip of his hand on my arm expressed that it mustn't question him about it.

So that is the scroll, its setup in the Dojo, how interesting. His iron grip still held me and dragged me out of the Dojo. It was hurting seriously. When we were outside of the Dojo and he sealed it shut, he turned to me and warned me one more time with a strict face.

"Promise me that you don't ever get close to this scroll again!"

I looked at him, baffled of his sudden change of mood. His threatening face and piercing eyes scared me.

"Ronen, you are hurting me." I yelped and he looked down on his hand and he abruptly released it.

"I-I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you. Is your arm okay?" he apologized with anxiety and looked at my arm and was ready to have a closer look at it, not before I placed my hand on it.

"No, it's okay. Thank you for the tour of the place, but I think I'll retreat to my room for now, have a good after noon." I said very quickly and evasively.

I bowed to him and left him standing there. I don't know why I reacted like this, I only knew that I was confused and for a split second I thought I saw Kakashi in Ronen. Also the lies I told kept on burdening me, showering me with guilt, I wonder if I ever could look myself in the face again. So much lies, I just hope it's for the good cause. I finally reached my room and stayed the remainder of the day inside. Since I had nobody in my room, I used that opportunity to train. I made exercises to become more flexible, some exercise to build up some muscles and some exercise for my chakara. Nightfall dragged by and while I was soaking in my bathtub, I heard some knocking at the door of my room.

"Yes, come in." I called.

I dunk myself underneath the water. As I was back on the surface, I heard some knocking once more.

"Yes, who is it?"

No response came, quite confused and curious I got out of the bathtub, dried my hair and self and put a bathrobe on. Precautiously I walked to the door and instantly pulled it open, to find Ronen standing there staring at my appearance. We stared at each other unable to find the words, and then Ronen was the first one to turn his back on me and clear his throat.

"I-I didn't mean to intrude, I just wanted to apologize for earlier, I didn't mean to scare you. I hope I didn't hurt your arm."

I looked at his back, his nervous behaviour was obvious and I thought it just looked so adorable on him.

"Well, you gave me a hell of a scare and a bruise, but I'm okay."

He turned around to me, but turned away once again. My appearance was too much for him.

"Stupid, go and sit over there while I get dressed up, in the bathroom."

Ronen complied and I retreated back into the bathroom to get properly washed up and dressed.

20 minutes later I came out fully dressed and with hair damp. Ronen instantly got up and I waved to him that he should sit.

"Sorry if I took long, long hair is such a pain to wash and dry."

"It's okay, I'm a patient man."

Silence fell upon us, it was an embarrassing moment when he saw me in a bathrobe, but remaining silent about it, wouldn't help.

"You are quite bold even courageous to enter a girl's room - I must admire that you kept you're cool. I think if I had entered a guy's room and met him with only a towel wrapped around his waist, I might've fainted." I said with humour and chuckled.

Ronen was tempted by my statement and showed some interest through his confident smile.

"Why faint?"

I raised my eye brow.

"I could faint maybe because my heart exploded at the sight of a God or maybe because he was so ugly?"

We both had a laugh; I think that was Ronen's first flirt with me and also mine. I was curious of his question and so I made an inquiry out of it.

"Why were you so interested anyway, I think any girl would react like that?"

Ronen looked at me in his eye there was a provocative glint, which Kakashi usually had.

"I was just curious how you would respond to such a question."

"Why? You thought I was going to blush and begin to stutter? That's a very typical assumption."

"No I wasn't assuming anything; I was just curious how you'd react to my flirt."

My heart leaped, wow that guy was direct and the colour rose to my cheeks. Then he pointed out with his finger to my face.

"Ha. I made you blush."

I cast him a dark look and looked away from him.

"Humph! If you answer so directly, yes it makes people blush!"

Ronen observed me with more interest and then he chuckled.

"I was kidding, Yuki-

-address me as "Sara" than I'll talk to you."

"Okay, Sara, I was just joking and anyway the main reason why I came was to call you for dinner."

I jumped up in horror.

"For Dinner?! You dummy why haven't you told me before? Than I wouldn't have taken ages to get all done!"

"Ah, don't worry, we can even eat at midnight if you want." He waved off casually and he added one more thing to make my heart leap once more.

"Anyway I have organised a dinner for us."

I raised an eye brow with suspicion and interest.

"Is that a dinner-date?"

"Maybe."

"What you mean by "maybe"? It has to be a yes or no."

"Yeaaano."

I looked at him with a frown, wonderful another retard at my neck, can't it get any better. He got up.

"Shall we go?"

I looked at him with arms crossed over my chest, tapping one foot against the wooden floor while eyeing him with suspicion. This guy was up to something. He came next to me and placed his arm on my back to push me to the door.

"Hey, hey what do you think you are doing?" I protested, looking at him like he was doing something inappropriate.

He looked at me and grinned.

"I'm moving your body to the door, since you are very slow."

"What else were you expecting?" he questioned me with suspicion and a grin.

I turned my head away from him.

"Nothing else! I can walk, thank you." I pushed his arm away and walked to the door myself and opened it.

Ronen closed it after him and we walked along the hallway in semi-silence heading to the dinning room. I felt his gaze resting on me and it sent a flutter in the pit of my stomach. I smiled secretly to myself, this was going to be a nicer time than I expected.


	24. Chapter 23

**PLEASE READ!!**

**Ouch! That was harsh, readers! I felt like I was stabbed in the heart twice! I've got two reviews that sounded so frustrated... Look if you can't keep up with the story, then fine, just drop reading it really. I know it's all about reviewing my story and I am seriously grateful to all of you that did so far, but there is a difference between venting your frustration on me then giving me a solid review, ok? Now if you don't understand the reason of this "new plot" that "annoys" and "bugs" you, I PUT IT IN THERE WITH THE INTENTION OF GIVING MYSELF AND THE CHARACTER A BREAK! Geez, I mean put yourself in the situation of Sara, would you keep up with all the tension throughout the story (I admire Sara, seriously, I would have given in and jumped Kakashi for all I care!)! So Chapter 22, can be regarded as a break for the characters to reflect. I'm sure you guys studied plays and such, the tension cannot be withheld during the entire play, it needs a break, the audience needs a break. It was my intention to leave Kakashi out in chapter 22 okay! It wasn't a mistake...Sigh... **

**I hope this chapter will give you clarity, so long...**

* * *

**CHAPTER TWENTY THREE**

- What the…! -

From one wonderful day, a week and half passed by. I never had such a peaceful week in my life, without a single worry or dispute and arguments of any sorts. I could finally experience a part of life that can be lived without disputes. I practically became a family member to this clan, despite that suspicion is still quite high among some of the elders. Also I could for once reveal half-truths, but I couldn't behave like my usual self, the real Sara, waiting to burst out of these pretences. It was strange, I felt a year passed by and my bond to Ronen grew closer and deeper. Each day we spoke, laughed, joked, discussed and only sometimes we didn't say anything and contemplated in our own thoughts or we looked at nature. I became quite close to him, like a close friend in whom I could confide everything to. Of course I didn't tell my true purpose in dwelling in his residence, nor who I was and my mission and even where I do really come from. He was very sweet and caring towards me. Behind that serious face of his was a man of reflection and maybe even need of attention and love. He is a softy. I realized I grew some attachment to him, some invisible bond that kept us together, I wasn't sure what it was, but I only knew I'm always anxious to see him and it relieves me to talk to him. What I thought was really adorable of him, sometimes when I left my room, I'd find on the floor in front of the door, cherry blossoms scattered over the floor. I always brought a smile to my face. Such a sweet guy. Also lately I noticed his lingering gazes on me, his winks and smiles; at each of these things it gave my heart a start. All of this made me forget about my true purpose in his clan, I've forgotten my mission; it was like I landed in a world where eternal peace prevailed. Konoha and all people faded away. Only Ronen and my well being was what counted. However all this utopia period vanished on a pain staking memorable day, which brought me back to earth instantly and straightened my mind right.

It was on a usual day, where suddenly some anxious knocking brought me up to my feet.

"Yes, come in."

There came my personal maid and she bowed.

"Mistress, my master is waiting for you in the meeting room, he says it's urgent."

The way the maid spoke told me that it was something urgent and I began to grasp the reality of the situation, what if they found out? I dashed out of the room and bumped into Ronen.

"What's wrong Sara?"

I just moved aside and walked on, talking to him was least important now; I had to find out what was the problem. As I was coming closer and closer to the meeting room my steps became heavier and my paces faster. My heart thundered against my chest, I think I was going to get a heart attack any minute now! I stopped dead in my steps in front of the sliding door; I stared in front of me. Whatever it was going to be I must face it with courage, I'm strong and tough! I gripped the handle and slid the door open and stepped in. It was the back door of the grand meeting room in which I first time introduced myself to the Fuhei clan. This back door was reserved for top people such as me and the father of Ronen. I found him sitting on his cushion on this elevated podium; he looked quite serious at whoever was in front of him. I took a deep breath and went in and kneeled down and bowed to him.

"You called me, Fuhei dono."

"Yes, I did and I'm glad you came so soon, because I have here a persistent young man who claims to be your Bodyguard!" he commented impatiently and I acknowledged his anger and let my gaze glide to the person.

By God! I think my jaw would have touched the ground by now and my eyes would have popped out! I couldn't believe my eyes, unmistakably kneeled Kakashi half way disguised in some dark unfamiliar shinobi attire. His hair remained silver and he had a patch on his eye and his face was covered in a black cloth as usual. His Konoha things were absent, head gear and hand guards. My heart gave a summersault when our eyes met. He got up.

"Princess don't you remember me? I'm Karashi your guard, the one that brought you safely out of the castle." He expressed with loyalty and hope.

I stood up, narrowed my eyes and suddenly gasped like it was a realisation.

"Oh, my God's it's you Karachi!" I exclaimed with disbelief and ran down to him to hug him.

Shit! I think I've over exaggerated. I instantly pulled back and looked at him with hope and imaginable happiness, which I really did feel.

"I thought they killed you."

"They haven't as you can see, princess. I lost my eye in this battle, but I'm relieved to see you safe."

"So am I, Karachi. Aren't their any survivors?"

I was amazed of Kakashi's acting, because he responded with a true melancholic face, which made my heart move.

"No, I'm afraid there aren't any."

A moment of sadness roamed between us.

"Anyway, I'm glad you survived, at least there's a person from my clan."

Then I turned away from Kakashi and presented to my father in law and surprisingly Ronen, who took an air of cold discontent.

"Fuhei dono and Ronen let me introduce to you my most loyal guard Karashi. It is thanks to him that I am here and became Ronen's fiancée."

"Really? He saved you?"

I nodded excitedly with a grin. The leader looked at me than reconsidered.

"If that is the case, than we must reward him with food and a room for tonight." Declared the leader with enthusiasm, but Kakashi instantly declined one of his offer.

"Fuhei dono I appreciate your hospitality, but I prefer to rest, the long travel from the Yukigakure to Kirigakure was strenuous."

"Yes, of course I believe so, but aren't you hungry?"

Kakashi's cheerful eyes told him already the answer.

"No, I'm not, but I thank you for the offer."

Than the leader looked at me.

"Yuki san, maybe you can guide your guard to the room across of yours, you remember the one I've showed you?"

I nodded with appreciation.

"Yes, of course. It will be my pleasure."

As we were about to leave, Kakashi called for the leader's name.

"Fuhei dono."

"Yes."

"Can I have your permission to speak with Yuki Sama in private?"

He looked at Kakashi and me and didn't see anything wrong about that and he agreed.

"Yes, I'm sure both of you have a lot to tell each other." He said and both of us bowed in gratitude and left the room.

"Ronen, stay here I need to discuss something with you." Stated the father firmly and Ronen who was behind me, stopped in his tracks.

I could tell he was annoyed about this, he gave a last smile to me and I smiled back at him, then Kakashi and I left the room entirely. Kakashi and I walked in silence along the hallway, he was looking around himself in such a casual way and I remained the only well behaved person. As we reached the landing of my floor, instead of turning left where my room was we turned right into the unused room. I switched on the lights let him in and locked the door. Kakashi gazed at the decoration of the room and all suddenly I pushed him further into the room into the sitting area and forced him to sit.

"What in God's name are you doing here?" I hissed and Kakashi looked at me in his casual behaviour.

"I'm playing part of your act to get the scroll."

"I didn't tell you to come; I thought by knocking you unconscious that you got the message."

"Well I certainly did get the message, but that's not how two-person missions are meant to be."

"Shut up! I don't want to hear that stuff! I'll get the scroll before you do in MY way and you won't interfere!"

"Who said I would."

"Than what the hell are you doing here?"

"I'm your back up, idiot!" he hissed back at me and was on his feet.

I couldn't comment on that and I dropped the whole argument.

"Have you forgotten that it is a mission for two, not solo? What the hell am I supposed to do outside, away from the action and everything?"

"Don't you realize that you're going to jeopardize everything that I've worked hard for, for two weeks?" I hissed back at him, taking threatening stances.

"What did you do anyway, seduce that guy and get pampered?"

I tried to slap him but he held my hand firmly in his and he brought my body close to his and held my chin so that I shared eye contact with him.

"Actually with that looks you can get whatever you want."

My heart raced against my chest and my cheeks burned. My god, I've forgotten how warm his body was… No I cannot; I pulled back quite suddenly, shoving him away from me. I sunk into the couch and sighed miserably burying my head into my hands.

"Oh, why did you come, Kakashi? Do you always look for fights? I'm fed up to my head of your arguments! Please, just leave me alone."

"I've missed you." He declared calmly and my head jerked up in disbelief.

"What?"

"You heard me I missed you and more importantly I want to get this mission done together. What about team work?"

"Mission and missions are the only things you live for Kakashi, but it isn't mine. I seriously begin to question myself if it's necessary to do this, I mean look they aren't as bad as they look."

"Don't you mean, Ronen to be more precise?"

I looked at him horrified, is he assuming that I have something for Ronen. I stood up and protested.

"What are you talking about?"

Kakashi chuckled and eyed me.

"Don't have to hide, Sara, you like him."

His words gave a cold shower down my spine; reality smacked me in the face. Actually what was I doing? I was being so selfish, ignoring everything important except for my happiness. I should be ashamed of myself.

"Akai would be sad to find out that you are backing down from your words."

I looked at Kakashi with disbelief, how did he know?

"It's because of him that I am here, he judged the fact that you are losing track of time and focus of your mission. I was sent here, to accelerate the things."

"Kakashi, things are more complex than you believe! Only if I get engaged and get close to this clan, will I succeed to get this mission done, I wasn't losing my focus."

"You were, Akai and I observed you for the past days, you have forgotten about us, only Ronen matters to you."

"Not true!" I shouted and realized that I was too loud; I calmed myself down and whispered through clenched teeth.

"This all part of the acting."

"I kind of doubt it's acting, the way you act in front of him, is like you are in love with him."

My face paled and the oxygen squeezed out of my lungs. Was it true, was I developing some feelings for Ronen?

"Your plan has a flaw, you haven't thought about steering your emotions. This plan is not well thought through and risky, but most importantly you're risking your sanity, your feelings. You are a woman, how could you possibly steer your emotions in a presence of a man, who charms you? You have acted on behalf of yourself, don't need to lie, I'm sure you have noticed it. Akai couldn't trust you to do your mission so that is why he sent me here, to make sure everything is going according to plan. And the worst thing is this plan will have a bad ending, there is no turning back, and are you ready for this? Even if it resorts to killing people?"

I looked at him appalled, combined with my pale face.

"Our true mission, Sara, is to destroy the scroll and the entire clan."

I stepped back, horrified about this truth.

"You hid this from me?" I croaked.

"Of course! Would you have accepted this mission if I told you?"

"I would have understood it better if you had told me the truth!"

"How am I supposed to trust you if you act on behalf of yourself? You just remain passive of everything! Everything must please you; otherwise you sulk and become furious! That is why you must regard me as your teacher and pay attention to what I say! You are my pupil and nothing more! Your duty is to serve your teacher and Konoha! Your emotions and hesitations are not important!"

"You truly have disappointed me Sara, I thought you were more reliable and dutiful, but obviously I was wrong." Kakashi said, quite defeated of his words and he turned his back on me.

I never had such a fight with him, never one where he was completely right. I realized how selfish I was and I felt extremely ashamed of myself. I stood there staring at his back.

"I'm so sorry." I whispered miserably and turned away and dashed out of the room completely.

I woke up the next morning very early without the help of the maid. Dammit it my eyes were so sore! I must've cried the whole night. I climbed out of my bed and directly went to the bathroom. I got washed up and fully dressed, and then I stood in front of the mirror contemplating over my figure and face. I hate to say this, although I adore this body, my real body in the real world is what I'm missing and my family as well. Sometimes I just wish there was a portal in which I could travel back and forth, like in the Anime of Inuyasha. I sighed to myself miserably. I lived in the seven heavens and suddenly crashed down to the ground because of Kakashi. For the love of God, can I not once in my life enjoy myself? Relax a bit and not be pressured around by my so-called teacher! Already at School it's like this, soon as you don't follow their instructions they attack you like a pack of lions on a prey. I took a deep breath and then slapped my cheeks.

"Don't let this get you, Sara! Be strong, fulfil your mission, Kakashi only gave you a reminder nothing more! Be bold and get a move on! We got to end this misery!" I mumbled with firm determination and raised my clenched fist to prove it.

I turned around and walked out of the room. I walked tiptoed and furtively along the dark corridors of the building, everybody must be sleeping. Suddenly I felt a hand rest on my shoulder and I shrieked and leaped at of whoever's reach. I found Ronen grinning at me with amusement.

"Already up? Are you playing some game of hide and seek or what?" he said with amusement.

I stood at my full height, fidgeting nervously with my fingers behind my back.

"Yea, I couldn't sleep and I wasn't sneaking!"

"Than what were you doing?" he inquired with interest.

"I didn't want to wake anybody up."

"Ah ha." Ronen raised his brow with amusement at my response.

"Shall we have breakfast before the others?" he suggested.

I thought about facing Kakashi at breakfast, which I didn't want to so I instantly nodded at his offer.

"Yea, I'm too famished to wait for the others." I bluntly agreed and Ronen gratefully acknowledged my reply and we both walked to the kitchen.

We sat down at the empty table and in a short time our breakfast was served and over the breakfast we chatted and laughed. Ronen had become a close friend of mine and it took me some time to realize that I would have to shatter this bond, in order to get the scroll. This very idea just brought my mood down. Come on! Sara, smile and laugh otherwise they'll suspect things. While I was in deep thoughts, I noticed Ronen staring at me with interest. My face turned red and I diverted my gaze.

"Why are you staring at me like that?"

Ronen smiled.

"You look very interesting when you think."

My heart jumped at his statement, but I responded with a chuckle and waved off his compliment.

"Ah, nonsense. Instead of staring at me, eat your breakfast it looks more interesting than I."

"I doubt that." His response was calm yet direct; enough to make me stare at him and make my heart skip a beat.

His penetrative gaze was locked with mine. Everything that surrounded us didn't matter to us anymore, only our eyes seemed to speak to another, however I was more so confused of his behaviour and confused of this indescribable and powerful glint in his eyes. I only knew that it was something breathtaking and heart-quenching. This moment exchanged between us seemed eternal, our eyes never left from each other, but Ronen was the first to look away and he slowly got up to his feet.

"I've got some small business that must be taken care of. Can we meet each other later?"

"Yea, sure, when?"

"Maybe in an hour and I'm sorry to leave you so suddenly."

"Ah, it's no problem, just go." I told him frankly.

I could tell that he didn't want to leave, but whatever it was it sure pressured him that he left me behind with a smile. I looked down on my food, my face still burned and my heart throbbed. Gosh! How could a guy whom I never met or seen in my life, cause me to react like this? This is so abnormal!?

"Ooh, isn't the atmosphere all lovey-dovey?" erupted the voice from behind me and I instantly spun around to the source of that voice.

Kakashi leaned against the doorway and he closed the sliding door and walked over to me. I turned away.

"Go away!" I snarled, but he ignored my response and simply took MY chopsticks and MY bowl to eat MY breakfast.

"Hey! Hey! Why are you eating from my bowl? Give it back to me! I haven't finished it!" I protested and tried getting my bowl back, but by halting me with his palm against my forehead, he ate casually out of it and ignored my tantrum and forgotten that he was holding me back.

"I prefer using the dishes from a person I know than using this guy's."

Still this wasn't an excuse for eating away my breakfast!

"Now give it back to me!" I snapped and illogically threw myself on him, knocking the bowl out of his hand and knocking him down on his back. After I opened my eyes from the falling, instantly I stared in front of me blankly with my breath caught in my throat. I lay on top of Kakashi, whose face was millimetres close to mine because he landed on his elbows. I felt his warm breath penetrate through his black mask and scorch my skin. Time, heartbeats, sound and movements were forgotten, a new dimension developed between Kakashi and I. Our stares crossed each other, he seemed equally surprised as I, but he did not really pay attention to our position rather his entire attention was focused on my eyes. For an instant I thought I could see the same glint as Ronen reflected in Kakashi's eyes, but told myself that I was hallucinating. Abruptly he rolled me on my back and pinned my wrists to the floor. The intensity in his eyes were so strong even desperate. The next action gave me a heart attack. His face began to near mine and with a whimper I turned my head aside, not wanting any of this. Kakashi stopped still and his grip loosened, I took advantage of this second and with my legs kicked him away from me. Without a word or a glance I dashed out of the room.

I ran back into my room and burst out in tears on the pillow of my bed. My head was in turmoil. I had no idea why I was crying, nor why I was feeling miserable and so confused and angry. First Kakashi scolds me, criticises me and then this! He takes advantage of me and thinks it's funny to play around with me! This guy is so heartless! This is it! I won't talk to him ever again!

"Never again! He should leave me alone!" I sobbed quietly in my pillow and slammed my fists with frustration against the bed.

I wanted to beat Kakashi up to a bloody pulp yet I longed to feel the warmth of his body and his blistering hot breath. My body remembered from the previous incident all the areas Kakashi touched and it plagued me, making me more miserable. Why is love so painful? Why are there only disappointment and only a moment of bliss? Shouldn't it be the opposite? I had become so exhausted from my out burst that I curled up into a ball and dozed off holding a fistful of the covers in my hands.

I've got no idea how long I slept, but I was quite sure that it was several hours, since it felt cooler and darker than before and my body shivered at the air current. I think I have forgotten to close the window. I let my hands fumble around for the covers and I came across something warm that was behind me. I tossed over and moved towards the pleasant warmth, when I was about to reach for it, it vanished and so did the weight. In my sleep I stirred and mumbled.

"So cold. I'm so cold."

I shivered and then I felt a cover was draped over my body. Very delighted I snuggled into the warm covers and exhaled with appreciation. Why did this cover feel so warm? Gently I felt somebody stroking my face and my hair. Who was that? I felt some weight shifting. I rolled flat on my back, I was very sleepy, and whatever was happening I couldn't recognize anything. Something brushed against my lips and it pleased me. Whatever was stroking me it pulled away and it paused for a moment. I was disappointed of this brief stroke, but slowly and gently a pair of soft wet lips placed on mine. They kissed me very gently and even carefully. I was too slow to react since I was half-way sleeping. Those lips were intoxicating. I wanted to taste more of them, however that desire couldn't be satisfied since those lips pulled away and retreated entirely from my presence. I lay there, half way sleeping and wondering what just happened. All noise ceased around me. It took some time for my mind to understand what happened and finally I woke up with a start, gasping out loud and clutching my mouth. My face was burning and my heart jumped to my throat. Who the hell kissed me? Suddenly there was a knock at the door and Ronen poured in accompanied by Kakashi. Both of them noticed me on the bed.

"Ah, you slept, Sara?"

"Only the two of you were nearby?"

"Yes, why do you ask?" questioned Ronen curiously and my face instantly turned red.

I looked at both men. If those two were nearby, that means that one … of them kissed me?! As a result of that realization, I diverted my gaze to the bed with a red face and thundering heart beats. This was too much for me, seriously!

"Are you okay, Sara?" asked Ronen with concern who walked over to my bed.

I was too embarrassed to look at Ronen and the least at Kakashi. I could feel his gaze burning a hole right through me. Why does Kakashi make me feel so uncomfortable around his presence? Can't all of them just go!

"We came here to remind you that dinner is awaiting you." Stated Kakashi calmly.

His voice gave a shrill down my system. What the hell was going on with me?!

"Guys can you wait outside, please. You startled me with your sudden presence in my room." I told them and Ronen who was sensitive enough to notice that they invaded my privacy and expressed his understanding.

"I'm so sorry, yes, of course! We'll meet you in the dinning room then."

"Thanks."

The men headed to the door and exited the room. Not once have I looked at them. What can you expect? First you get scared to death by your teacher, than kissed by some stranger and then surprised by two guys who are responsible for kissing me! My God! Please just shoot me! I dropped my face on the bed and groaned. Why is everything so complicated! After getting dressed to some formal attire and my hair combed back in place, I left the room. Outside waited Kakashi and Ronen patiently. Ronen greeted me with a smile, whereas Kakashi leisurely leaned against the wall with his hands sunk in his pockets and his gaze seared my eyes. Promptly I diverted my gaze and focused my attention on Ronen. All three of us walked along the long corridors and after many descents we arrived at the main dinning room. Once again the table was grand and over exaggeratingly decorated with plates with various foods. This only signified that the leader was going to give a special announcement and I had a presentiment in my bones what it could be. We walked in, the leader noticed us and quite enthusiastically pointed out our places, once again I sat next to the head of the table and so did Ronen across of me. Fortunately sat Kakashi beside Ronen right across of me. It was a disadvantage on the other hand, but as long as I focus on Ronen it should be okay. While we waited till the other Fuhei members sat at their places, the leader had been observing me. I looked at him and smiled.

"Why are you observing me?"

The leader responded with a fatherly face.

"I'm just so happy for my son."

"Why is that?" I asked him with curiosity and in a low voice, since this conversation was only between us.

"You'll see in a moment." He said, barely able to contain his anticipation.

Finally everybody found their places and seated themselves at the table. The chattering instantly ceased and all attention was on the leader.

"Once again, I've invited you all for a special occasion. This announcement is certainly worth to celebrate."

I could tell everybody couldn't contain their anticipation and I noticed Ronen was slightly nervous about something; his gaze remained transfixed on the table. He seemed to mentally prepare himself for what was going to come next. Also the Father couldn't help himself but spread this anticipation throughout the room, even the servants were struck by this atmosphere. After what seemed like an hour of silence, the leader clapped his palms together and rubbed it against each other.

"Actually my son, has to announce this important moment." The father indicated to his son and Ronen got up to his feet, his gaze remained lowered.

His body language was rigid; it was marked in his nervous attitude. He took a deep calm breath and walked over to me. Every eye in the room followed him, I could tell that he hated to be the centre of attention; I nearly thought he was going to trip if the stretch had been any longer. Then he stood in front of me, his dark orbs looking at me with sincerity and I got up.

"Haburashi Yuki…" he began but it was clear that whatever he was going to say was extremely difficult and to reveal this in front of the entire clan. Who wouldn't be nervous?

He took another breath to calm himself down and he raised his striking eyes and finally gave a declaration.

"I love you. Will you accept to be my bride?"

My heart froze, my breath was cut short and my mouth mechanically opened and closed. I couldn't believe what I heard. He actually confessed his love in front of me and the whole of his clan…Wow such courage… He said the words that I so dearly wanted to hear but not from his mouth. A thick atmosphere descended upon us, nobody dared to speak or breathe. It was an awkward situation, it was the first time I had such a confession and even a marriage proposal as a bonus! I glanced over at Kakashi, he was also startled of this confession and he even appeared quite unusually pale. I focused my attention back on Ronen, who stood looking at me with mixed feelings and hope in his eyes. It was so difficult to reject a man looking so desperate and so cute at the same time. The truth stung my heart; I had to tag along and at the end take advantage of his love towards me to get the scroll. A part of me wanted me to cry and confess my true intentions, but the other side berated that I must proceed with what I started. All this work should not be in vain! I took a deep breath to regain myself and as a response to his proposal, I energetically even boldly jumped into his arms and cried with pleasure.

"Of course I will!!"

Cheers and claps broke out. Ronen who was stupefied of my bold response took some time to melt and wrap his arms around me to hug me back. The father was so happy, finally the happiness he wished for stood in his son's arms. I ignored the stings of pain in my heart, ignored that Kakashi was in the crowd looking at us. I'm sorry. Truthfully I felt happy to be in Ronen's arms there was a part of me that liked Ronen, but it felt reassuring to know that this man loved me. Only deep within my heart I wished it was Kakashi who said those words, but I knew it was impossible. I don't belong in his life or in his story. After all in the manga it never shows once that Kakashi has somebody he loves or is it maybe Rin? It must be her… And I believe its better so. Maybe I should steer my feelings towards Ronen or NO! I should become immune to any feelings; it will ease the issues of getting the scroll. Ronen pulled back and he held my hands and brought them up to his lips and kissed them. I was just so moved of his affection that I just smiled back tenderly at him. How can anybody resist such affection defined in a man's face? He let go of my hands and went back to his seat. The father gave a proud pat on his son's back and he gave me also a gentle pat on my shoulder, to show his pride over such beauty.

"Their wedding will take place in two weeks and I will be most considerate if all of you would participate. Now let's celebrate!" he declared and raised his tiny bowl of sake.

Everybody cheered with happiness and excitement and I just grinned at everybody. Ronen raised his bowl of sake towards me to toast me on our engagement. The look he gave me made my heart jump and I acknowledged it by raising my bowl high and smiling at him. We drank as a toast to our engagement. The night only begun and the celebration were definitely going to last until the very late morning.

Many of the Fuhei members had left, only Kakashi, Ronen, I and the leader were left. Kakashi was the only sober person in the room. The servants had already taken a hold of the leader and were leading him out of the room. So Kakashi decided to help Ronen and me and he helped Ronen up, swung his arm around his waist to support him. Then he came over to me and did the same. He walked us out, holding us on either his arms until two maids came and took Ronen off his arms. As the other maid came suggesting some help, Kakashi waved off.

"I don't mind to bring her to her room."

I was aware of what was going on, only that I was too drunk to react. I let everything happen and Kakashi guided me along the corridors.

"You just had to over do it, typical you!" he grumbled and dragged me all along, while I only hiccupped.

"Why didddn't you sselbraaate with uusss?" I uttered incoherently.

Kakashi pulled his head away in disgust, as my breath smelled badly.

"I don't see any reason to celebrate and become totally drunk."

"Yuu arrre suaach a barty booper."

"Better that then making a fool of myself!" he hissed quietly to me and finally we reached the door of my room.

Kakashi held me firmly with his arm around my waist and pushed the door open and closed it behind him with a kick. I pushed myself away from him.

"Lemme walk, I'm noo kid anymooore." I insisted and staggered but was then caught by Kakashi who caught me by my waist.

"You see how drunk you are, I tell you you'll have an extreme hangover."

"Yeaaa! Whatevvaa! Now lemme go! I want to go to bed!" I ordered him but he simply guided me over to my bed and directed my body to sit down.

"Kakashi, just goo, I can do it, I'm no kid noo moore."

"Be quiet, Sara! You are too drunk to do anything, so just let me help you at least!" His voice was sharp and stern, very unlike his usual calm tone.

I complied but grumbled in protest.

"Gosh, what is eating you?"

Kakashi ignored my response but it was true, he was angry about something. His rough behaviour of taking off my shoes and undoing my hair confirmed it. He grabbed the clothes that was on my bed and thrust it into my hands.

"Now undress yourself in the bathroom."

"Yes, mister negative, sir!" I babbled drunkenly, got up promptly and zigzagged to the bathroom.

In there I clumsily took off my clothes and threw that night Yukata over myself, which was my pyjama and tied it clumsily tight. I barged out of the bathroom with my other clothes and threw them towards the couch which missed it by centimetres. Kakashi picked them up and neatly folded them over the lean of the leather couch. Kakashi then scanned my appearance and shook his head.

"This not how it's done." He said and walked over to me.

His hand gripped the ribbon attached around my waist and tied it better and closed it better by overlapping the openings. Then he straightened the collar.

"Kakashi, it's enof, I don't waana be pampered more."

"I'm not pampering you, I'm just taking care of you and making sure you won't break a bone while reaching your bed."

"It's neva going to happ'n."

"How do you know? It's impossible to leave you alone for a second without getting yourself hurt!"

"Will you stop being such a grouch! I didn't do anything to you!" I snapped, but Kakashi retorted back.

"Yes, you did! You just make everything more complicated for me and you!"

"What do you mean?" I questioned him with my temper rising and he stopped dead in his actions and pulled away and looked at me with a scorn.

"Your feelings are the obstacle for succeeding in our mission."

I advanced on him, repeating with distinction.

"What do you mean about my feelings?"

Kakashi groaned.

"I can see when you smile or look at him, you are filled with affection towards him. You are beginning to love him."

I was taken aback of that assumption and retorted.

"Of course not! It's only improvising!"

Kakashi looked down on me with indifference.

"I doubt that, I can see it in your eyes and in your behaviour that you like him. Anyway what is that you like about him anyway? He's only an effeminate guy! There is nothing interesting about him, only that he stares at girls and gives them a wink and all of them fall to his feet!"

I listened to all his comments with growing anger.

"Where do you get such absurd ideas and plus overreact about it? It's not like you're jealous or something!"

Kakashi instantly froze in his words and his movements. I looked at him and it made "click", words remained stuck in my throat. This couldn't be, no, impossible, he, no way! It looks like Kakashi tried to force himself to act as usual but it was in vain. He only stared at me. It was the first time that I saw him like this. I approached him.

"Kakashi…Are you actually jealous of Ronen?"

Kakashi did not show any signs, but it was written all over his face.

"What makes you jealous of Ronen?" I asked him, he turned his face away and exposed some blush.

I looked at him; he seemed struggling with himself so violently that he clenched his fists tightly and closed his eye.

"Kakashi…Does it regard me?" I asked him, disbelieved that I was actually asking it directly.

Kakashi looked like he was slapped awake and quite abruptly I found myself forced against the wall. Kakashi pinned my wrists and his face hovered close to mine.

"You have disturbed my peace, caused a jumble with my mind! You have complicated everything in my life! I cannot think straight anymore nor be at ease without you plaguing my mind!"

I listened once again with my temper rising, this guy was once again insulting me, but I was curious and I let him continue. He was out of breath; he pulled his mask down with such urge as if he was suffocating. Kakashi's breath scalded my face, sending the tingling chills down my spine.

"We cannot be like this; I'm your teacher and a good friend… I've been fighting with myself for so long about my troubles and I cannot find my peace!"

"This urge to be close to you, to hug you, to kiss you and touch you, drives me insane! Let me be close to you!"

I lost my breath and I looked at him, staring wide-eyed. I couldn't believe any of this, I must be dreaming, this cannot be true! I shook my head in disbelief. This is all a dream. Then Kakashi's face grazed my cheek passed to my ear and he whispered with his blistering hot breath.

"Sara, admit that you feel the same."

He didn't give me a second to respond, but energetically pressed his lips against mine. His entire body pressed me against the wall, there was no escape. His kisses were so hot, passionate and desperate that it overwhelmed me. I've never felt such an emotional and passionate kiss before. How long did he hold this back? Days, months or years? I couldn't imagine having such strength to hold back such emotions. He then laced his arm around my waist to pull me even closer to his hot body and thundering heart beats. It startled me how strong his heart was beating. Since my eyes were wide open in shock, he opened his and looked at me with utmost affection. He closed his eyes and savoured my taste. His hand found itself on my leg and he started gliding his hand up my thigh pushing the Yukata aside. I slapped his hand and pushed it away. He then moved us away from the wall and pushed us on the bed. Kakashi lay on top of me, never once breaking the kissing. However he stopped for a moment to look at me, the face he made moved me so much. So much tender feelings shone in his meaningful eyes. Then he moved his head to my neck and kissed and nibbled it. Wow, this was going too fast and it felt too strange as well and worst of all I wasn't enjoying as I hoped. With my hands I tried pushing Kakashi away, but he was so caught in his desires that it was impossible to push him off.

"Kakashi, stop it!"

"Kakashi, I mean it! Stop it! I really don't feel go…"

My voice died away, everything began to spin and everything began to fade. The warmth of Kakashi gradually vanished and no sooner I fell into the dark abyss of slumber land.


	25. Chapter 24

**CHAPTER TWENTY FOUR**

- Sudden changes -

I woke up due to the blazing brightness of the sun shining on my face. I sat up, momentary blind with patches of colours in my eyes. Then the headache struck me so badly that I plumped back into my bed and groaned.

"Gosh! My head is killing me!"

"It's most likely the hangover." Sounded Ronen's voice actually just beside me.

With a yelp I pulled the covers up to my chin and spun my head towards him. He actually sat very nearby on a chair which leaned against the wall. He grinned at me with amusement.

"Please, Ronen! Cut that out will you! I don't want to wake up every morning with a start! It'll only make me in a bad mood."

Ronen got up and walked over to my bed and sat on the edge and looked at me.

"Well, I'm your fiancé and anyway soon we will be sharing a room."

I blushed at his bold response and diverted my gaze.

"Still, you shouldn't just barge in, even if we are engaged, okay? Just give me some time."

Ronen gave me that affectionate look of his. He was simply so adorable, who could resist such a man like this. I giggled at his appearance.

"What's so funny?" he questioned with curiosity.

"I don't know if I should tell." I replied with a raised eye brow, flashing him a mischief smile.

Ronen was hooked by this and tagged along.

"If you don't tell me, than I'll have to resort to drastic measures."

I eyed him with interest.

"And what will that be?"

In Ronen's eye flashed some mischief.

"I'll have to…Tickle you!" he pushed me down and began tickling my stomach.

I started laughing and giggling and struggling to push his hands off of me. I rolled around; laughing and the tears of laughter rolling down my cheeks. I didn't have enough oxygen anymore and I couldn't find anyway to escape his tickling so I grabbed his arms and yanked them towards me. However instead of remaining firm on the floor, he actually fell on top of me squashing me entirely. A grunt escaped my mouth at the heavy impact of his body against mine. This guy's body was really broad; it was like a blanket covering my entire body! His face was buried just above my shoulder in the bed. I moved my hands up to his waist.

"Hey, Ronen, I think you should move. You're squashing me."

Ronen did not respond nor did he even move. I stared over his shoulders to the ceiling. There was a moment of silence. Then I sighed.

"Ronen, I think you better should get off, because I don't want that the maids or Karachi to see us like this. I already don't want to know what they might be thinking."

I felt that Ronen was back in motion and he raised his body from mine, but remained on all his fours and I underneath him. The look he gave me made my heart skip a beat and squeeze at the same time. Only pure affection was in his eyes.

"I cannot express how much I long to be close to you." He spoke gently meaning every single word.

I was moved by his statement, but felt this unpleasant squirming in my stomach and it kept on growing. I had to suppress this feeling before it reveals my identity, so I decided to tease Ronen a bit.

"Quite a slick move to corner me like this."

Ronen, who had lost his voice after falling on top of me and scanning our momentary position, tried his best to find his voice and he spoke with a hoarse tone.

"I didn't-

- A, a ,a! Don't play coy with me Ronen. Judging by your body structure you are very strong, so my yanking shouldn't have made you fall. Unless you on purposely fell on me."

I think I was worsening Ronen's situation and hurting his self-esteem, since he seemed to turn redder the more I spoke about him. I was overwhelmed by his shyness and embarrassment that I rested my hand against his cheek, he simply was so adorable.

"Don't be shy, Ronen, after all consider yourself lucky that you don't have to demonstrate this in front of your clan."

Ronen broke out in laughter and I joined in, the very idea was too freaky and deranged.

"You sure like ruining beautiful moments." Ronen said with amusement and I just replied.

"Well you look so stiff and shy, so I thought maybe some use of humour will relax you."

Ronen chuckled, but then with pride he defended himself.

"I am not shy nor stiff, it is just an unfamiliar situation."

"You blushed, you know."

"I did not."

"Did too."

"Did not"

"Did too and you looked so cute like that."

Ronen who was ready to quarrel back to get his pride restored, swallowed his words and blushed even more. I pointed at his face, childishly and giggled. Ronen looked away, his pride was hurt, but I was sure he wasn't going to give up.

"Okay, it's my turn then to make you blush." He retaliated and suddenly pressed his lips against mine.

I was too surprised and shocked to react. Unpleasant squeezing and stinging in my heart and general uneasiness caused my mind to display the faces of Kakashi. His lazy face hovered in front of my eyes, his eyes crinkled cheerfully. I felt like getting sick and fortunately enough Ronen pulled back and smiled proudly.

"I take your speechless state as a compliment." He said proudly.

While I lay beneath I felt that all this was too familiar to me. Did I maybe have a déjà-vu? My body could remember some of it and I found myself blushing wildly. I found back to myself when Ronen looked at me with concern.

"Sara, are you alright?"

"Yea, of course! You only caught me off guard that's all." I lied.

The look Ronen gave me told me that he was unconvinced, so I decided to start a new topic to distract him and get him off of me.

"Don't you think your father might be angry to find you in my room, on my bed on top of me and dressed only in a light Yukata?"

The words "light Yukata" sent a wave of realization and embarrassment down his body and as a response he quickly pulled away from me. He was back on his feet, his gaze diverted by shame and his face shaded. I got up, straightened and flattened the wrinkles out of my Yukata.

"I'm sorry." He apologized with embarrassment.

I walked over to him and guided him to the door.

"Anyway, I've gotta get dressed and I'll meet you down in maybe, uhm, ten minutes."

Ronen who was directed to the door, merely nodded.

"Ah, okay." He stammered and walked out of the room.

Down beaten I leaned against the door. My fingers brushed over my lips, the pressure of his lips still remained and my heart was racing. What was going on?! Why was I blushing and getting heartbeats for Ronen? I must confess that this guy with his looks can overpower any girl, but I did not expect that it would begin to create some confusion within me. However what scared me the most was that I DID feel a tiny spark of longing for Ronen. It was only a miniscule thing that caused a mass confusion within me. All of a sudden I had this urge to shout for Akai to help me, to advice me what to do next or how to react to this. I couldn't rely on Kakashi, since it regarded my feelings towards him. It took me a moment to realize the reality, I was alone. I had nobody in the entire building to which I could confess things to, it drove me insane! I moved away from the door and decided to undress myself. After a couple of complication, which exceeded over ten minutes, I stormed out of my room and involuntarily bumped into someone.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't mean-" When I encountered the person I ran into, my voice died away.

Kakashi looked at me in his usual calm expression, but there was something that made him equally speechless. Our closeness was intoxicating. He held me by my forearms and finally spoke up.

"You are finally awake, do you feel better?" he asked with his cheerful attitude.

For some odd reason I was feeling very nervous around him, my eyes couldn't meet his nor did my face or voice wanted to stay normal. Also my heart was beating powerfully than ever before. Realizing that I was lost in words, I quickly recapitulated with a nervous and direct response.

"Yes. Of course…"

A moment of silence reigned between us. All of a sudden his face grazed my cheek and he whispered in my ear, causing me to shiver, my breath to hitch and my heart to scream.

"I can more or less guess what happened in there. He did his first move, right?"

Why did his voice send such a thrill and longing in my system? Why did it seduce me and enticed me so? Kakashi didn't expect any answer from me and continued.

"Just be aware of what you might expect next time and don't appear tormented otherwise he'll suspect something."

"I know what I must do, don't underestimate me." I warned him with a whisper and broke away from him, but he abruptly grabbed a hold of my wrist.

"Don't you remember anything?" he questioned me anew with more force to his voice, this time he seemed anxious.

I turned myself to him, looked at his hand with confusion, but when I met his face, my heart skipped a beat. He wore an appearance of a desperate man, desperate to find some answers to his torment. Staring at him with stupefy, I searched in my head for the answer he was looking for, but what came up in my head was: what was he talking about?

"Are you sure you don't remember anything?" he questioned me once more but firmly.

Still extremely confused I stared at him blankly. What does he mean by this?

"What do you mean?"

Kakashi lowered his gaze; his silver hair gave a shadow over his facial expression, concealing his expressions. There was once again a silent moment.

"Is that maybe the reason why you are avoiding me?" he spoke again but in low voice.

My heart skipped a beat, he was right that I avoided him, but what does he mean by this, is it associated to his previous question?

"I don't understand what you mean, what shall I remember?"

Kakashi's brief pause and tense behaviour, hinted me that it wasn't the answer he was seeking for and his next brief and cold response sounded like a shower of needles.

"Anyway, just forget it." He succumbed and released me and walked away.

I watched his presence gradually parting, his neck sunk in his shoulders, his back appearing gloomy. Overcome by the senses of comforting him I ran up behind him and tugged on the back of his shirt and rested my forehead against his warm, broad and inviting back. His body instantly became rigid by surprise.

"I am avoiding you intentionally, because I am worried that something may happen to you if I spend too much time with you. But please, even if a thick wall has emerged between us, please stay by my side..."

Kakashi remained silent, as if startled by my statement. I lowered my voice and had a secret smile on my face.

"Truthfully, I did miss you too."

Realizing what I just said, instinctively I pulled away from his back, surpassed him and trotted along the hallway, leaving Kakashi behind standing in the middle of the hallway.

I quickened my paces as I jogged along the corridors and down several levels. I was still quite flushed. I was quite embarrassed of what I said and I believe I've revealed a part of my feelings towards him. I mean, leaning against his back is like having an exam with the answers on your desk. I whined to myself and clutched my mouth. The blush was reaching its boiling point. The only thing that made me nervous was will he ever perceive my feelings behind my actions? I stopped dead in my tracks and shook my head. Impossible! He's too insensitive to notice anything, well, uhm, actually he's not entirely insensitive, he was able to detect my troubles quite easily…Just…What about feelings, love feelings? I shook my head once again to bring me back to my reasons. I slammed my fist against the wall.

"Impossible, he wouldn't, he couldn't, in any circumstances feel anything for me. This wouldn't make sense, I'm just a person that appeared in this story, impossible that such a thing could happen." I muttered with exasperation.

I swore out loud. It was too much for my head to cope with, too much for my body and too much for myself, the intensity of my feelings for Kakashi crushed me. Anxiety rose because of the confusion between my feelings for Kakashi and the development of Ronen's. I slapped my cheeks and firmly marched on towards the dinning room. My surroundings passed by in slow motion. I must remain strong and emotionless. I must not waver otherwise the mission will fail and as a consequence Kakashi and I might lose our lives. My duty as Sara and as shinobi was strong. Now I understand Kakashi better, I understand why feelings and emotions are obstacles in a mission, not only because they hinder you to fulfil the mission, but they also can severally damage you. By killing somebody with feelings of fear and regret will cause you to become insane and guilt will haunt you, however by shutting out all these emotions things can get easily done and you won't get hurt. So this how he lived I understand better and I curse myself for being so ignorant of this. From now on, I must change. I must become a better shinobi and put my feelings and emotions aside, duty comes first. Life is anyway bitter and harsh, the only way to cope with it is to keep your mouth shut and yourself moving. I hereby pledge that from today on I will extinguish my feelings towards Kakashi and I mean it.

I walked into the dinning room and found the leader and his son at the table deep in conversation. I cleared my throat to attract their attention, the conversation immediately ceased, as if it was a secret meeting.

"Haburashi san, how are you this morning, did you rest well?" questioned the leader delightfully and I smiled at him.

"I'm doing well, I just feel a little bit light headed from the drinking."

"It's understandable, please sit down and have some breakfast."

I bowed my head in gratitude and joined them at the table. The servants came and brought trays filled with salmon, sushi and rice. The atmosphere was relaxing and enjoyable; we talked about other things which weren't related to my engagement. We laughed and joked. It was strange, I felt like I was part of a family again. The leader actually didn't turn out to be the greedy, arrogant, macho man as rumoured. He was actually a kind-hearted and warm man who obviously did care for the well being of his son. It seems like due to my arrival Ronen's relationship to his father has improved and I was quite proud of it. From time to time, Ronen stole some glances towards me and it always seems to surprise me and make my heart jump. Indeed he was handsome; he was the man of any girls' dreams. Why shouldn't I be satisfied to be near him? Our lively chatter calmed down when the leader paused. Then he proceeded in a more serious attitude.

"Haburashi san,"

"Yes."

"Pardon me for being so rude, but how old are you?"

I chuckled at the leader's formality.

"No, you aren't being rude Fuhei dono, I'm actually 18."

The leader's and Ronen's eyes nearly popped out of their skulls.

"Really?" repeated both of them with disbelief.

I was amused of their disbelief that I giggled.

"You believed I was older?"

Both men exchanged a look and nodded.

"You appear physically older than expected."

"I know, but I take that as a compliment."

The leader smiled, but then he cleared his throat and folded his hands and took an air of seriousness.

"Haburashi san, the reason why I asked you and my son to have breakfast with me, was because I have to clarify some issues with you."

My hand that lay on my lap clenched involuntarily.

"It regards your body guard, Karachi."

My nails pierced through the kimono fabric and sliced into my lap, I ignored the pain. Behind my back, I felt some foot steps and a voice announced.

"You have called me, Fuhei dono?" asked Kakashi politely.

I didn't have the courage or the will to turn around to meet his gaze, he caused already enough trouble.

"Ah, Karachi, yes we have been waiting for you, please sit." Instructed the leader and Kakashi sat on the other end of the table on an empty cushion.

"We just started talking about you."

"Really?"

"Yes, it's regarding your position as body guard."

I spun my head to the leader, was he planning to, I hope he wasn't…

"I've noticed that you are intimate with Haburashi san, am I correct?"

"Yes, it's correct."

"As far as I understood, you have been guarding her from young."

"Yes. I started being her body guard when she turned 10."

"This makes you how old?"

"I was 18 at that time."

"So you are 26 now."

"That's correct."

The leader paused, observed Kakashi strictly while sipping from his tea.

"So you do now Haburashi san very well, I suppose."

"Yes, I do."

"Have you been only guarding your mistress?" questioned the leader intently.

I observed Kakashi, he was the cool himself. I wonder how he could be so calm at such an interrogation.

"I've been appointed various roles for my mistress, I am her bodyguard who pledged his loyalty to protect her, and I'm her mentor and her servant."

"How come a person like you with no nobility, can be entrusted with all these tasks?"

Wow, that was pretty harsh and I'm curious how Kakashi would respond.

"I'm aware of the differences in social classes, but I was appointed by her father himself to protect her. I swore my loyalty to him."

"But why appoint you, he could have taken anybody."

"He appointed me this position because I was the strongest in the region."

It was funny I felt that I landed in a completely different story, Kakashi's acting skills were outstanding and I just wondered how he could keep his head on his shoulders.

The leader observed Kakashi critically. I stole a glance at Ronen; he on the other hand seemed quite entertained by this interrogation. Was he maybe behind all of this?

"Haburashi san, has your body guard ever exploited his position?"

"What do you mean, I don't understand?"

The leader sighed and eyed me firmly.

"Has he ever taken advantage of his position, to be close to you?"

My heart skipped a beat and abruptly I stood up.

"Of course not! He's my protector and not lover, if it's that what you mean!"

"If that is so, why do you act so intimate with him?"

"Because he's my friend!" I shouted now and covered my mouth self-consciously, embarrassed of my out burst.

"If that is the case, than tell me why Karachi brought you to your room and left an hour later!?" the leader demanded and slammed his fist on the table.

I was startled of the leader's fury and I exchanged a blank glance with Kakashi with my heart pounding against my chest. Our gazes met, but he ignored me and calmly recapitulated

"I brought her to her room because I sworn to look after my mistress, I feel responsible for her. She's like my daughter. I only brought her to her bed, covered her up and sat beside her bed, making sure she hasn't fallen into an alcohol coma."

The leader huffed furiously, he couldn't detect any points that he could attack and accuse Kakashi for. There was an icy silence, where the leader glared at Kakashi and Kakashi kept his indifferent face. I felt nervous and was afraid that we may be discovered, so I gathered my courage and stood up.

"He's telling the truth! He brought me to my room and helped me to go to bed. I asked him to stay until I fall asleep; there is nothing wrong about that! There is nothing going on between us! He's accustomed to this, right Karachi?"

"Yes, I am."

The leader studied our conversation and kept a sharp eye on Kakashi.

"I hope it is what you are telling me, because if it isn't, Karachi will be executed."

I looked at him protest, but he ignored me and continued.

"Still some of us realized that Karachi is distracting Haburashi san, so I will dismiss you from your position as her body guard."

"Are you going to kick him out?" I blurted in protest and the leader looked over at me.

"Haburashi san, please understand this is for your own good-

-No it isn't! It is only for the good of the person who's extremely jealous! Whoever that is, he is a coward for not telling me straight in the face!"

I clenched my fists, panting at my out burst. I was embarrassed about my reaction, but furious that such a story could be created out of thin air, whoever that was he'll so dearly pay! I felt all eyes fixed on me, I sighed defeated.

"If he has to leave, I'll leave too."

All men stared at me with horror and disbelief. I had no idea what face Kakashi was making, since I lowered my gaze. Ronen was so shocked of my statement that he immediately took some initiatives.

"Father, there is surely another way to solve this."

The leader looked at his son and sighed with defeat.

"You. You caused some scandal after what happened last night and the other times. With such a low social class you cannot permit yourself to enter rooms without permission and since you are her bodyguard, you are forbidden to enter her room without her call. You can keep your role, however you must keep some distance and reduce your socialising, am I clear?" Ordered the leader strictly and Kakashi, who became more serious, obeyed without a word.

"Whatever you wish, Fuhei dono." Kakashi bowed his head, showing that he was obeying to the leader's orders.

The leader observed Kakashi intently and waited until Kakashi raised his head to speak further.

"Since I'm a careful man, Haburashi san will move into Ronen's room until the wedding."

"What?!" I repeated with disbelief and the leader ignored my reaction and added more oil to the fire.

"The wedding will be moved to next week, in seven days."

My jaw became slack and I spluttered.

"But Fuhei dono-

-No, complaints! When I make decisions you must follow them, as the bride-to-be of my son!"

The leader got up and left the room in thundering strides. I watched him leave with disbelief and horror. This can't be happening, this can't be true! I would prefer to sleep in the same room with Kakashi than with Ronen, who knows what might happen…I turned violently red at the possibilities. Then Kakashi gets up and bows to me.

"If mistress seeks help, you can find me in my room or outside." He left without looking at me and disappeared out of the room.

Pain struck my heart. I didn't want any of this! It will complicate everything! How the hell was I supposed to know without talking to Kakashi, when to get the scroll and at which moment? Then a hand rested on my shoulder and it instantly brought me back to the room.

"Sara, I'm the coward behind all of this."

There was a brief pause, of course it was him, my assumptions were right.

"I noticed it, thank you for telling me this at the END of the interrogation and accusation!" I snarled and brushed his hand off of my shoulder.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean it to end up like this, I swear."

I turned around and retorted.

"Swear as much as you want! What you did was selfish and irrational!"

Ronen was shocked of my accusation, this idiot must deal with this otherwise I'll be really angry.

"Damn! He's the only friend I've got left from my clan and you wanted to kick him out only because he knows me better than you? This is such a childish behaviour! What else are you going to do? Lock me up in your room with chains?!"

"No, of course not, I-

-I'm aware of your feelings!" I shouted at him.

There was a moment of silence, where Ronen stared at me disbelieved that I shouted at him.

"I know what jealousy does, it makes you hallucinate things and by the end it makes everybody angry. Let me be clear I don't have any interest whatsoever in Karachi, okay! We know our positions and duties. We are just friends, nothing more!" I declared firmly and Ronen, who still stared at me, began to soften up and become melancholic.

He took a hold of my forearms and didn't look in my eyes.

"I'm sincerely sorry for the trouble I caused…"

His arms slowly wrapped around me and pulled me into a tight embrace. He didn't speak nor did I since I was speechless. He embraced me so intimately my body pressed against his, his one hand holding my head closely. My heart pounded against my chest. I closed my eyes and let myself bathe in this warmth. This warmth was so comforting, so inviting and calming. How wonderful it is to be in somebody's arms. He pulled away and looked into my eyes; so much affection sparkled in his eyes, so much tender feelings. How could I resist it? His face approached mine and gently he captured my lips, my arms that hung down raised themselves and wrapped themselves around Ronen's broad back. My eyes were closed and I savoured the taste of his lips. My body began to accept Ronen, even my heart screamed with delight. Ronen then pulled away and leaned his forehead against mine and smiled.

"You are slowly accepting me, it relieves me."

I smiled back at him.

"But it long doesn't mean that I'm going to share the room with you." I told him sternly and Ronen seemed to have felt a boulder fall on his head.

"You sure are an expert in ruining romantic moments."

"Are you going to do something about it? Because I'm not ready for this."

Ronen sighed hopelessly, I know he was vexed of my response, but I was preoccupied of getting this settled first.

"Why don't we have a look at my room before deciding something?" he suggested and I met him with my eyes narrowed.

"Don't get your hopes raised, okay? Only a peek."

Ronen cheerfully broke away from me and grabbed my hand and guided me out of the room. We walked hand in hand throughout the house, letting everybody witness how close we were and I on the other hand felt a bit embarrassed. Each corner we turned or each way we took, I just hoped that Kakashi wasn't around to see this. Finally we reached our floor and instead of taking the first door to the right, we took the last door on the left. The room we just entered was far more spacious than mine! It looked like the size of a whole flat, bed room, sitting and studying room was included. The bathroom was in a separate room, but overall it was a cosy place. I took notice of some things standing near the door; I took a peek in it and sighed.

"They already brought my stuff, how annoying."

"It's not that bad as it seems."

I looked at with the facial expression of he-can't-be-serious-can-he. I narrowed my eyes and marched up to him.

"Maybe for you not, but for me yes!"

I slapped my hands over my cheeks in horror and preformed the dance of horror.

"If I stay here, it will be like throwing a chunk of meat to a pack of hungry lions! My innocence will surely be taken away in no time!"

Then Ronen rested his hand on my shoulder and I jumped out of his reach with a panicked yelp.

"Please, don't take away my innocence! I'm still too young and inexperienced and I don't wanna get pregnant yet!" I whimpered, but Ronen gently took my hand and raised it to his lips, his eyes never once leaving mine.

"Rest assured I won't do it if you don't want it." He reassured me and kissed my hand.

I blushed at his statement and my heart skipped a beat.

"I can guarantee you to that you will be safe until the wedding night."

"Which means no touching?"

"Yes."

"No assaults over night?"

"Yes."

"Will I have the guarantee that it won't be going over the limit of hugging and kissing?"

"Definitely."

"Good, everything's settled…But by God if you break your promise, you are dead meat!"

Ronen edged back at my cold statement and chuckled nervously. I knew I could trust Ronen; he was very reliable and respectful. So I felt no worry or whatsoever when settling into his room. However later in the night after dinner came the biggest problem. The bed. There was only one double bed wide enough to fit four adults. We stood there staring at it.

"That's it! I'm sleeping in my own bed." I declared and turned around heading towards the door, but Ronen grabbed my wrist and dragged me back towards the bed.

"You sleep on the bed, while I sleep on the floor."

Immediately guilt stricken, I argued back at him.

"No, you sleep on the bed and I'll sleep on the floor."

Ronen shook his head.

"It's settled we'll both sleep in the bed." He declared cheerfully, forgetting the last argument and went to the bathroom with a load of clothes in his hands.

My heart pounded nervously, what if he made a move? What if he takes advantage of me while I'm sleeping? What if? All sorts of stuff popped up in my head, causing me to blush and shake my head with embarrassment. I took advantage of this time to undress myself at the speed of lightening. Every second I glanced at the bathroom door, ready to turn away if I wasn't fully dressed. Finally when I tied my Yukata tightly closed, the door unlocked and there came Ronen. I instantly blushed and turned away. This guy was dressed in his light kinagashi (male kimono), revealing some portion of his well built and slender chest. Gosh! Why did he have to be so damn handsome!

"Wow, already dressed up." Noticed Ronen with amazement and I chuckled and turned around.

"You know after travelling by myself I grew accustomed to getting dressed faster."

"I see…Well I'm tiered, I'll go to bed."

He right away headed to the bed, pushed down the cover and stepped in than cover himself entirely. He lay near the edge of the bed. I felt quite sympathetic and guilty. I climbed to bed and our backs were facing another, although there was a good one meter and a half gap between us.

"You know there is no need to sleep for you to sleep at edge."

"Is that more preferable to you." His voice whispered just behind my head and his arms wrapped around my stomach and pulling me to his warm body.

I gasped in startle at his sudden closeness and stammered with protest.

"Please, Ronen I'm not ready for any of this."

"Than we must begin to get used to it." He breathed, his hot breath scalding my ear.

I shuddered at the feel of his voice and shut my eyes, trying to regain some control over my body.

"Please, Ronen let go of me, I'm tiered."

Ronen finally released me but did not intend to move.

"I promise that I won't touch you, but can't you let me be close to you?"

I didn't show any objections, because as long there was no touching it was okay. Ronen sighed with content. The bed was so warm and comfortable, I felt tiered after all this trouble and gradually became sleepy and no sooner I fell asleep.


	26. Chapter 25

**Heya again!!! Sorry I've been having some crisis which had happened at the time when you guys gave me "the" strong review!! However I've gotta let you know that I am very grateful that all of you have reviewed my story until now and followed all of it, I hope you can forgive my bickering tone of last time, I had no intention of scaring you all off or most likely pissing you off or killing the motivation to read my story....**

**I haven't been getting reviews lately and I immediately thought that the probable cause of it was due to of my out burst, ( I am really sorry and I mean it, sniff!) but now I am okay (if you want to know)... So, uhhh, this chapter has a lot of stuff and I realized I could have created two chapters out of it, but I thought the title of the chapter pretty much summerises the whole thing, or the events actually. **

**Ahhhhhh -eyes sparkling with admiration- I truely love my story!!! I've been re-reading many times and I am still totally engrossed. I felt Kakashi has somewhat become a part of me, well thank goodness I don't dream about him or other, but you know I've dived so deep inside both characters and felt I was standing there witnessing the whole events, feeling the quarals, the sexual tension, the suffering of unrequited love, the insecurity, the passion and many other struggles which we as women (men, if any are reading my fanfic) that we confront in our lives like the insecurity of the durance of a relationship. I think one comment I would give to myself about my story, is what a pity that I haven't narrateted from the perspective of Kakashi, still now (although we all can guess what he feels or thinks to some extent) I think I would have enjoyed myself to death, really, about discribing certain awkward situations and feelings Kakashi had!!! -grins- **

**Anyhow, I hope you enjoy this chapter as you did all other chapters +/- reviews are always welcomed (I'll try to be more tolerant and refrain myself from getting too angry, give it all your best shot, oki?)

* * *

  
**

**CHAPTER TWENTY FIVE**

- A hellish scare -

Only four days were left until the wedding. Three whole days I've spent sharing the room with Ronen, or more precisely sharing the same bed. I was quite satisfied and built enormous trust into Ronen, not once did he ambush me over night or touched me. Also within the three days he didn't hug me nor kiss me. Mentally it was a relief, but on the other hand it was torture. For three whole days I couldn't look or even speak to Kakashi, and Ronen and the entire clan made sure of that! Ronen acted quite possessive sometimes and it did irritate me greatly and resulted me to be gloomy. However I recalled the times Kakashi looked at me with a melancholic face before I would disappear into the room of Ronen. After contemplating over his reaction, I still couldn't find the answer of his depressed behaviour. I noticed he tried to speak to me, but in the middle of his attempt he retracted and walked away. Something was troubling Kakashi, it was obvious. For the first time since I was in the Naruto world, Kakashi did reveal openly - maybe discretely towards the others – that he was troubled and frustrated over something. His facial expression seem to worsen either when he saw me going in or leaving the room of Ronen or when Ronen and I were intimate with another. The bitterness was obvious in Kakashi's face, however these hints still couldn't tell me what was bothering him. Also what I began to realize was that my feelings towards Kakashi have cooled down and some tiny feelings towards Ronen were starting to develop. The more I was with Ronen the more enchanted I became towards him, I felt some odd attraction and it freaked me out. I just realized it now but it was unlike me, I felt the attraction was triggered by something insignificant. It was like a second individual in me had begun to have some serious interest in Ronen. Also the more he smiled and close he was, the more I was longing for him. It seriously scared me, so by avoiding him for three days, was the only solution to restrain myself. However I was soon losing my sanity after becoming a total recluse. My craving for social contact was incredible.

It is in the afternoon of the fourth day of my total reclusion I've reached my limit. Fortunately Ronen and his father were away on a family business trip and were going to return later tonight. Everything went according to plan. I decided to take a stroll out of my room and went outside in the garden. My intentions of course were to find Kakashi, not only to have some company but to discuss further about our mission… Maybe I needed to confirm if my feelings were intact towards Kakashi, I really desperately longed to be close to him, even if it was only looking, talking or standing beside him. Safely I grew more anxious of these changes within me and doubted that I could pull through the mission without going nuts. I needed some encouragement and motivation desperately!

I walked in the garden around the house; I stopped at the cherry blossom tree which attracted my attention. This is where it all began. Where Ronen for the first time socialised with me and I grew to like him. I took off one layer from my Kimono and laid it out on the grassy, warm and soft ground. I sat on it than plumped back. I smiled to myself in delight. It felt great to lay down in the grass, freedom and peace at last! I looked at the blue horizon passed the branches adorned with creamy pink cherry blossoms. Tiny white and puffy clouds floated by taking shapes of various things. I lay in the shade underneath the great tree, savouring with my eyes closed the wind gently caressing my face and rustling the blossoms so that some blossoms detached and sway back and forth until it touched the ground. My first thought was if only Kakashi would be beside me, sharing this serene moment with me. With my eyes closed I could picture him clear as glass in front of me, his ridiculously cheerful face chuckling at me. O how I wanted to be close to him! It drove me crazy. I opened my eyes and raised my left hand to the sky to observe my hand; there on my ring finger glimmered a thin silver ring adorned with diamonds. Obviously in Japan the engagement ring is worn on the left hand and not on the right one. It confused me some time, but the moment Ronen offered me that ring was special and memorable. His affectionate face while presenting me this ring floated in my mind and made me very happy.

However my smile vanished, how would Ronen react if he finds out it was all an act? I rolled over. I don't even want to think about it! I'm much too preoccupied with the fact that I may hurt Ronen so much. I gasped in horror. It just struck me how brainless this whole set up was. I'll hurt everybody but mostly Ronen; I don't even want to imagine what face he may make! I sat bolt up and got back on my feet, collected my layer of kimono and jogged back into the building. Inside the house I walked calmly making sure to appear normal and not suspicious. However when I landed on the floor in which my room was, I picked up my pace and stopped dead in front of one door. It was one door that I haven't entered once since my stay and it was given to my so-called body guard. I glanced watchfully in both directions of the corridor, checking if anybody was nearby. I closed my eyes and concentrated on my senses, I didn't feel any presence on our level only the chakara of Kakashi in his room. Since not a soul wandered anywhere nearby, quietly and discretely I opened the door and entered the room.

It resembled my room a lot except that it didn't possess luxury such as space and decoration. It was comfortable but it was insultingly of lower class, the luxury was removed and the room gave an air of simplicity. I felt like this room was a closet; however it did possess a lot of illumination, some space to work and sit. I felt quite insulted that Kakashi was rewarded with such a mediocre room, even though he played the role as a guard who saved my life. The room did not possess rich furnitures but simple ones, very similar to Kakashi's flat, in which he maybe felt comfortable with. I walked deeper inside the room; it was squared and was supplied with all necessary things that a simple person of lower class needed a bed, a desk, a table, couple of chairs, and a cupboard. Although I was horrified of the stiffness and poorness of this room, they actually made an effort to decorate it in a way which gave an air of comfort and warmth. The whiteness of the walls, bed sheets and curtains, combined with some caramel brown of the polished wooden floors and furnitures and with a hint of peach – gave the room some life and well being. When I stood in the centre of the room, I noticed a door which was locked and heard some movements. The door was situated just beside the bed; I guessed it was the bathroom. All of a sudden the door unlocked itself and out came the damp Kakashi dressed with only a white towel around his waist, his silvery hair shorter than usual and spiked up in a mess. I gaped at his presence and my face turned bright red. Finally he took notice of me and appearing equally surprised.

"Uhm, hi Sara." He greeted me calmly.

My gaze was frozen onto his appearance. His body was covered in part with scars, but that wasn't the thing that stunned me. It was how hot he looked! His appearance of coming freshly out of the shower gave my heart a start. His body steamed and glittered with pearls of water, which rolled down his slender and athletic body. I caught a glimpse of one who rolled down between his chest and over his abdomen and diverted my gaze out of embarrassment. His maskless face reminded me how hot he looked and seeing him like this, I realized that I completely forgotten how hot he actually was! I felt my face turn redder and redder by the seconds I stared at him. I had to repress this strong urge to touch him and as a result realizing how long I was staring him, I turned promptly away with my back against him.

"Gosh, I-I-I'm so sorry; I didn't mean to barge in like this!" I sputtered with embarrassment, wishing that I haven't entered his room at all.

"I'll immediately leave the room." I concluded abruptly after an embarrassing moment of silence and walked quickly towards the door.

However I couldn't reach the door, Kakashi had grabbed my wrist pulled me back so promptly that I tripped over my kimono and pushed him to fall. After landing roughly on the wooden floor cushioned by Kakashi's body, I opened my eyes and my heart screamed and if I hadn't been speechless I would have done the same thing. Inching below my face looked the astonished Kakashi. Both of us stared at each other, what happened surprised us so much that we couldn't utter a word. Nevertheless I blushed completely, my hand rested against his shoulder while the other was on the floor close to touching his silver hair which supported my weight and prevented me from closing the distance between our lips. For the first time I could smell his manly scent, which steamed off of him and it pulsed my feelings throughout my body. The warmth of Kakashi's body radiated through my own and his hand holding my waist caused my entire system to squeal with delight. It felt like time had stopped entirely. Our breaths mingled, my feelings rushed through me and I found myself lowering my face to his, but before I could ever reach his lips I was suddenly flipped over on my back and pinned down by his hands.

The pearls of water splashed down on my face and kimono, with Kakashi's face close to my ears.

"Do you know what happens to girls who enter a man's room after his shower?"

I didn't answer him at all; I only stared dumbly at the ceiling paralyzed from head to toe. I suck in some air when his lips grazed my ear.

"They won't escape untouched."

His blistering hot voice and his statement caused me to shy away from him. My face turned red and my heart jumped to my throat. He trailed his breath along my neck to torment me, causing me to quiver and whimper.

"Kakashi, stop it!"

"When I get started, nothing can stop me." He breathed.

My heart clenched at his words and I turned my head away. My face boiled and my heart beat insanely fast. What should I do what should I do?! He's too strong for me… When he was hovering millimetres over my neck, he burst out in laughter and raised his head to show his entertained face. I stared at him with bewilderment.

"You've got to see that face of yours, it looks ridiculous." He said with amusement, barely able to keep him on his hands anymore and he imitated my face.

I looked at him still confused of what just happened and when he grinned mischievously at me, it slowly dawned to me of his intentions.

"I was only playing around."

A vein burst in my head and successfully even though he still had my wrists forced down, I harshly pushed Kakashi off of me. He found himself on his butt, looking at me nervously. The fire burned in my eyes and I raised my trembling fist of fury.

"You said you were playing with me, huh!" I glowered at him, giving him a menacing glare, his figure shrunk at my wrath.

I cracked my knuckles menacingly as I walked towards Kakashi, staring daggers at him and bringing the storming black clouds with me.

"Let's see who's playing when I beat you up to a bloody pulp!"

Nervously Kakashi raised his palms as a sign for giving up and chuckled ridiculously.

"I was kidding, just calm down."

"Well that wasn't funny; you gave me a heart attack! So quit pulling dirty tricks on me, such as these!" I huffed with my face still burning red from the whole embarrassing moment.

I turned another shade redder when I realized all this time that Kakashi was one towel away of being completely naked. It was even amazing that his towel miraculously never fell down and I thank the Gods that!!! I spun around.

"For my sake, please get dressed!"

He got back on his feet and patted my head with amusement.

"What a shy thing, how cute." He teased me and I smacked his hand off of my head with contempt.

He walked over to his bed where he picked up his neatly folded clothes, but then he noticed me looking in his direction he eyed me mischievously.

"You can look if you want as long as I don't have to clean up your blood and drool."

I huffed away with my nose raised up in air and retorted with a red face.

"Don't think too highly of yourself, jerk!"

I walked over to the couch which had its back facing Kakashi's direction and sat in the far far corner away from him and his changing. Also he seemed unwilling and even too lazy to go to the bathroom to get dressed in there. I frowned to myself, what a macho! This jerk thinks it's funny to do play such dirty tricks on people, by God he'll get that all back! However a remarkable smile crept over my face and my heart fluttered. Inside me I squealed with delight and danced around singing "I saw Kakashi nearly naked, I saw Kakashi nearly naked, oh yeeeaaah!" Realizing how childish and perverted I thought I shook my head reasonably, what the heck am I thinking?! If you show to Kakashi that you enjoyed it he might ambush you again and definitely pick on you mercilessly.

"So who do I owe this pleasure that unpardonably infiltrated my privacy?" Kakashi spoke with such exaggerated and humorous formality when he walked over to me and sat down on the couch across of mine, fortunately fully dressed. He even had his mask back on and his eye cap.

"Shut up! I'm sorry already!" I twiddled with my fingers with my gaze fixed on them.

He leaned back casually and chuckled.

"I'm proud of myself. I managed to make you blush and recoil in embarrassment, you actually look very cute."

A shade stretched over my cheeks.

"Quit that will you! It's very mean what you did anyway!"

"I just had to confirm something."

"Confirm what?"

Kakashi looked at me quite provocatively and leaned forward.

"I had to check if you had sex with Ronen."

For a moment I stared at him blankly, what? Then abruptly I grabbed him by his collar and brought him to my eye level.

"You did THIS! To verify if I did IT with HIM!!!" I roared menacingly at him and shook him back and forth.

"I had to endure this embarrassment and humiliation, ONLY because you had to check if I had sex with him!? You know you could've asked instead of doing THAT!"

I huffed furiously than dropped him back on the couch and plumped back into my own, burying my face into my palm with a groan.

"You know you gave me a hell of a scare…"

There was a brief pause. Then Kakashi took over the conversation.

"You know I wouldn't go that far with you anyway, especially if you lack the physical appeal to tempt me..."

I raised my free clenched fist to warn him to stop talking before I beat him up and he immediately ceased talking. My face remained buried in my palm. Another pause followed. In a short time Kakashi talked again, but he sounded calmer.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to scare you. I simply missed teasing you."

"Whatever! Still it wasn't funny! If you can remember, I didn't laugh once."

I sighed hopelessly, even if you'd slap the guy he wouldn't understand a bit of it!

"It's like I would run around with only a towel and suddenly assault you, if you know what I mean!"

I raised my head to check what kind of face Kakashi was making. I should have kept my mouth shut. He looked at me in a provocative way; his eye glinted with the excitement of mischief once again.

"Well, it would surely make my day."

I frowned defeated by my correct assumption and got up, fed up of Kakashi's teasing parade and snapped back at him.

"As usual you are useless!"

I was ready to storm out of the room, but Kakashi reflexively caught my wrist and I spun my head to him and for the first time he wore an understanding face.

"I'm aware of your feelings."

EHHH? I stared at him blankly and my heart froze. My reaction wasn't what I expected, shouldn't I be happy, but what is this lead called "dread" weighing in my chest? I felt like arguing defending myself that he didn't know anything. His look was so penetrative that it made me divert my gaze. He gently pulled my wrist and directed me to the empty space beside him on the couch. I sat down beside him and looked nervously at him. He released my wrist and placed his elbows on his laps and rested his chin on his folded hands.

"For quite some time I've been aware of your feelings, many times you spoke in your sleep about it and I'm sorry if I eavesdropped on you, I never meant to hurt you."

The more he talked the more my hope rose, however soon as he mentioned the last sentence I became confused. What did he mean?

"I couldn't help but hear you calling his name several times in your sleep, especially in the tent."

I looked at him with confusion, what was he talking about or who was he talking about?

"Don't play dumb Sara, you know very well who I am talking about!" he said impatiently and looked at me sharply, but I shook my head with confusion.

"It's Steve!" he exclaimed uncontrollably and I recoiled in startle at his sudden outburst.

Kakashi, who looked at me with mixed feelings, sighed to get some self-control back.

"I've noticed that you treasured his name a lot, especially when you pretended that you had a child called Steve, isn't that so?"

I froze to a stone figure… I was aware that I had some left-over feelings for Steve, but it long did not mean that I only loved Steve! However my emotions stirred so strongly that I found myself on my feet and expressing the truth.

"Yes, Kakashi I love him! Yes I do love him; he's the first person I ever loved! And what's it got to do with anything?!"

Kakashi jumped to his feet and retorted.

"A lot! You've been hooking up with any guy possible because of your unrequited love for Steve!"

I was stunned of his unusual anger and confused of its meaning, but it was out of question that he was accusing me for things that I haven't done.

"What do you mean, Kakashi?" I demanded with my temper rising.

Kakashi huffed furiously and argued sharply back.

"Stop using me and Ronen as puppets to satisfy your unrequited love towards Steve!"

It finally came out, the truth poured out from Kakashi which burdened him so much and drove him to be so resentful. I stared blankly at Kakashi, overwhelmed by his statement. Was I… Really doing such a thing? Did I really use men as puppets because I haven't succeeded in getting closer to Steve or haven't succeeded to tell him anything? Was I really such a cold and ruthless person who used others to satisfy my needs?

"Have you got any idea how much you are hurting us, by acting all so tender and by the end it turns out to be all a scheme? Instead of giving us a hard time, go and be with him, instead of venting your feelings on us!"

I have become pale and I felt nauseous, all this was too much for me. There was such enormous confusion in me. I wanted to defend myself because it was wrong what he was saying, but all strength to defend myself had disappeared.

"Why haven't you told me if you felt like this?" I asked with my voice barely audible.

"Who cares if I haven't told you or of how I feel? I'm just telling you to stop manipulating people with all this hollow feelings, I'm seriously going to hurt you back!"

I was so appalled of his reaction, appalled that those were his true impressions about me. My shocked gaze sunk to the floor. Kakashi's angry outburst cost him some oxygen and he huffed furiously. All of a sudden he harshly grabbed my shoulders and poured his frustration all over me once more.

"Why did you do this? Do you think it's funny to create false hope in people and to exploit them! Answer me, SARA!" he gave me a brief but rough shake, insisting for an answer.

Overwhelmed with frustration, sadness and shock. Instantly with a slap, Kakashi's head remained turned aside revealing the colour of his red cheek creeping out of his mask. My hand was still raised in the air and it shook. I couldn't believe that I slapped him; it was the last thing I ever wanted to, resort to violence with Kakashi. As a result I lowered my red palm and the tears poured down my face.

"I may have become colder, but I would never exploit people's feelings. Since the very beginning my feelings were true, I treated you with the whole respect of a friend. I never vented my unrequited feelings on you, no; I kept them inside sealed from everybody else fearing that it may hurt people like you or Ronen." I expressed sorrowfully and truthfully.

"You jerk! You misinterpreted everything, all my actions were good willed and never evil, it's because you have become somebody precious to me in whom I wouldn't betray and hurt!"

Kakashi became speechless of my statement and his fury began to gradually disappear, but I didn't care I wanted to tell him what was weighing so heavily in my heart, I wanted to get rid of it!

"I never intended to vent my unrequited feelings on anybody, but I admit I was confused some times and maybe I unconsciously hurt people around me. If you felt I did than I'm truly and deeply sorry. I'm sorry if I did - I'm really sorry."

For a moment I couldn't talk my sobs were so incontrollable and strong that it hampered my speech. Kakashi remained quiet and overwhelmed with mixed feelings. Kakashi, if I had the courage I would tell you how much I love you! How much I wish to stay by your side and how much I wish that my true identity and background would be erased only to be beside you! However reality forces us apart, forces me to conceal everything from you and live here in lies! God! I wish I was born here, neglecting the consequences if I told him my love for him! Why must I be cursed by reality that robs my dream to live with him? Will the pain cease! Will the complication of my feelings, the fear and uncertainty cease to hurt me!

"Kakashi, I'm such a coward! I couldn't tell him even if I loved him unbearably. To pay the price, I was cursed with the pain of regret and needles in my heart! I've dreamed, wished and prayed to tell him to finally get rid of this unbearable burden, but I couldn't, it did not want to detach from me, it didn't want to be forgotten!"

My body trembled and was weakened by my sorrow, I don't know how long I would manage to stay on my feet and my head felt like it was going to split in two.

"But I want to forget him; there is no possibility to tell him anymore, because he's long ago dead!"

All of a sudden Kakashi pulled me into overwhelming embrace, but I struggled against him.

"No, Kakashi let go off me, we cannot be seen like this, nor is it right!"

Even if I told him that he clasped me firmly in his embrace, repressing any of my resisting attempts.

"I'm sorry, Sara, I had no idea! Please stop shedding any more tears!" he expressed desperately and remorseful.

His tight and overwhelming embrace, plus his desperate voice, melted down my resistance. My trembling frame was enveloped in such comforting warmth that it soothed it gradually.

"Kakashi, please comfort me! Please get rid of this horrible pain that hurts me so much!"

Kakashi couldn't say anything but he only held me firmly, hoping that his hug could sooth me. My arms crept up his back and I gripped his shirt with trembling hands and I buried my face in his chest. The agony spilled out of me through my sobs, frustrated self-accusations and Kakashi only held me silently listening to my cry. I was angry that he didn't say anything and I pulled forcefully back and cried.

"Say something! Tell me what to do! Do something to get rid of this pain!"

The only response I received was an empathetic face, which understood my pain, but I shook my head.

"I don't want pity! I want you to remove this pain!"

However Kakashi engulfed me in his hug once more and spoke still in his desperate voice.

"No matter what I say or do, it won't cure you from your pain. Let my arms be your comfort."

"Why can't you cure me? Why can't you help me? Then what's the point of holding me?" I sobbed with frustration and Kakashi's grip tensed.

Then he pulled back and looked at my tear stained face, his look was solemn.

"He's dead, Sara, he won't come back to life no matter how much you pray or cry for him, he's gone."

My legs collapsed and I landed on my knees on the wooden floor and I sobbed even harder.

"But I wanted to tell him, why did he have to die before I could tell him? He doesn't know how I feel!"

"No, he does!" contradicted Kakashi who kneeled down to me and I looked up at him shaking my head at the impossibility of his response.

Kakashi rested his hands on my shoulders.

"I'm sure he knows by now, only that his death restricted him to receive your love."

"How can you know?"

"Because if I had been in his position, I would have accepted your feelings no matter what."

I stopped sobbing and stared at him. The earnest in his eyes and in his statement moved me so much that I threw myself against his chest. He nearly lost balance and sat down, while holding my frail and trembling figure between his knees against his chest. His arms laced around my body and he held me again tightly against him. Kakashi caressed my head and back in comfort, while I sobbed agonizingly in his shirt and telling how much I loved Steve.

I don't know how long I sat there sobbing in Kakashi's chest, but it felt like an eternity, the pain was so enormous that the only way for it to come out was through my crying and tears. Finally I stopped crying. I was cuddled against his warm, heaving and dropping chest. I could hear his calming heart beats that soothed me and feel his strong arms that gave me comfort. He changed place to be more comfortable and he was leaning with his back against the couch cushioned on the soft carpet. I sat between his knees, leaning my shoulder against his chest with my head pillowed in the crook of his shoulder where his head rested against mine. It was such a comfortable and beautiful moment, a moment that I've yearned for so long. Kakashi and I were very silently, seeming to enjoy this infinite moment of comfort. Feeling ready to talk again, I started the conversation.

"I'm sorry for making your shirt all wet."

Kakashi chuckled amusingly at my sudden excuse.

"It's not a problem." He told me with reassurance, not bothered by the slightest.

Then his hand caressed my head.

"Do you feel better?" he asked calmly and I nodded.

"That's good to hear."

There was a brief pause. Then Kakashi continued speaking.

"I should have told you beforehand that I really suck at this stuff."

"No, you don't, even you did a great job." I spoke gently, expressing my gratitude.

He then chuckled with ridicule.

"No seriously I mean it!" I defended my statement and I pulled away by putting pressure against my palms that were on his chest to meet his eyes.

"Before I really sucked, come on, I could have done-"

Kakashi became instantly aware of our closeness, his voice died away and instantly I realized it when he stopped talking and stared at me. We exchanged a long uncertain and stunned stare, like both of us didn't know what to do next. Then Kakashi's face gradually yet hesitantly neared mine, his gaze glancing to my lips and my eyes with such intensity. With my eyes slowly closing and our faces inching, he approached my face, the closer he came the harder my heart pounded, and also Kakashi's heart was beating quickly. Only a centimetre left to close the distance between our lips.

Suddenly a strong knocking at the door caused me to leap out of his arms and look alarmingly at the door. Kakashi called out.

"Yes."

"Karachi, it's me Ronen, may I come in?"

My heart jumped to my throat out of fear and I looked at Kakashi anxiously, who was back on his feet and he wore a reassuring look. Ronen stepped in and when he came in entirely he seemed shocked to find me here with Kakashi, alone. I trotted over to Ronen and planted a kiss on his lips to greet him.

"Hi, Ronen how was your day?" I greeted him happily with a broad smile.

He looked at me for a moment, seeming to study my eyes and then he smiled at me.

"It was good; we managed a good business with another clan."

I nodded apprehensively, but then I stifled a yawn.

"I'll let you boys talk, while I go lie down a bit, okay?"

Ronen and Kakashi didn't show any objections and I left the room successfully. As I left I only hoped that Ronen wasn't going to imagine the wrong things about me and Kakashi being alone in one room. With such a jealous man anything could be possible! I just hoped Kakashi could talk us out of this; find some random but efficient excuse to convince Ronen. Anxiously I quickened my paces and vanished in my room. I burst into the bathroom and witnessed with horror at my tear stained and puffy eyed face. Only an idiot wouldn't suspect a thing! I washed my face with cold water and rubbed in some soap. After combing my hair and other smaller necessities I changed into something more comfortable, and then I sunk underneath the covers and lay down, snuggling into its soft and warmth. My eyes were sore and my throat too. Too much crying hurts a lot. Gosh also the head aches are a nightmare! When I lay in bed I realized how exhausted I was, this crying business always smothers you by the end. I managed to calm myself down and slowly my eyelids dropped and already I was fast asleep.

I woke up at the sound of the birds chirping in the early morning singing to its kind, to signal the dawn and the beauty of the fresh day. I got up carefully sitting on the edge of the bed with my bare soles touching the floor. I turned around and noticed Ronen sleeping close to me, his sleeping face looked so peaceful yet he looked so exhausted as well. Did he have trouble sleeping? I observed his face in contemplation. Determination grew in me, the earlier I finish this mission the less pain we will endure. I stood on my feet, straightened my Yukata and walked over to the window, pulling it open and stepping outside in the balcony. I leaned with my hands gripping the beam which served as railings for the balcony. I stood there viewing and inhaling the freshness and beauty of the crack of dawn. All of this was so breath taking, the birds chirped peacefully and lyrically as they flew by. The cherry blossom trees which were distinct by their colours and their funny patches of blossoms, gradually started changing their colour from a darker shade of pink to a lighter one, as the sun started to rise. The smell of dew lingered in the air and a chilly breeze, hushed through the area rustling the trees with him.

I was suddenly engulfed in an overwhelming embrace with my back pressed against a wall of muscles. I gasped in startle.

"Ronen!"

I knew it was him since he was the only individual in the room apart of me.

"I thought you left." He whispered, his breath scorning the inside of me ear and sending me a shrill down my spine.

Then his head lowered and began to plant kisses along my neck.

"I was afraid…you went…to see…him." He spoke between his kisses and I struggled with discomfort to resist his kisses by keeping a cool head.

"Who?"

"Karachi."

My heart made a start and he stopped kissing me so that he can speak clearly.

"I know he's your body guard and your friend, but how can I help myself if I see you two alone in one room." He whispered calmly with some bitterness in his tone.

My face flushed, remembering what incident happened in Kakashi's room and my heart skipped a beat at the thought that we nearly kissed. Ronen's arms tensed around my stomach, as if overcome by the bitterness of the reality of this situation.

"I was informed that you stayed two hours long in his room."

"Yes, maybe that's true, since I was unaware of the time that flown by."

There was a bitter pause in his speech, but then he proceed sounding bitter and bitter as he went on.

"Can you tell me what you did in there and why you appeared that you wept?"

My heart made another jump, I couldn't tell him anything that happened in there, but revealing to him part of the truth would clarify this issue. I sighed.

"I've told you before, Karachi acts also as my mentor and I simply discussed with him over deep things from the past."

"And why don't you talk to me about this?"

My heart jumped, it's true I could have, but what use would that be? Anyway I'm playing a role of a bride-to-be who ends up betraying the whole clan for stealing the scroll. Ronen it's for your own good…

"Don't you trust me?" he questioned me with even more bitterness after my brief uncertain pause and as a result he withdrew his arms and retreated into the room.

He left me standing there, letting the guilt of his words seep into me. As a response I spun around dashed into the room and blocked his passage. His disappointed and bitterness were so strongly reflected in his behaviour and eyes that I was overcome by guilt and urge to comfort him. His cold eyes looked at me.

"How can I be sure that nothing is going on between you and him, if you share deep things with him instead of me? I don't even know if you love or trust me? Your eyes have been lately only following Karachi and vice versa!"

I was struck of how observant he was, but it gave my heart a shock to hear that Kakashi has been observing me as well although I did realize that myself. However I gathered my reasons and shook out that ridiculous and unrealistic belief that Kakashi did feel something for me, despite of the incident from yesterday. I really hated this situation, now I have to lie mercilessly at Ronen. I grabbed his forearms and expressed with desperation.

"It's not true Ronen! None of this is true! I confessed deep things to him so that I don't have any left over remorse that can endanger our marriage! It is an act of cleansing myself for you, because of you I want to start anew with different feelings and forget my past."

"How can I be sure that behind your words are not lies?" he shouted with anguish.

I was stunned of his words, but I recapitulated firmly.

"Isn't my presence in your room, sharing your bed proof enough that I trust you? If I hadn't trusted you I would have slept in your room! Your reassuring words that you won't lay a finger on me until our wedding night caused me to trust you!"

Ronen's face softened, it seems that he found some reasons in my words and the final biggest lie slipped out of my mouth.

"If I trust you so much than it means that I love you!" My words bounced off of him and throughout the room.

It squeezed my heart so painfully that I had to use drastic measures to keep him blindly believing I was going to be his bride… However those words weren't destined for him, although I felt some liking towards Ronen, but the one I loved was Kakashi only. The fear that my words were too loud for Kakashi to hear scared me. Ronen looked at me blankly, unable to speak. However the silence was suddenly interrupted by the rush of Ronen's feelings. No sooner I was on the bed crushed by Ronen's weight and smothered by his demanding lips. I realized the more passion he poured onto me the more panic grew in the pit of my stomach. Yet some abnormally liking burst and my body steered on its own, clasping Ronen's body tightly on mine and kissing him back fiercely. It was like another individual dominated my entire body and pushed me aside. Helplessly I witnessed as my body satisfied Ronen's lust, kissing him ferociously like an animal plus stroking him. I was sick of my animalistic behaviour that with panic and dread surging in me I desperately tried getting control over my body. It was a mental confrontation, but when I found the source of it I was shocked.

I found myself in a white empty space, across of me several meters apart stood the demon represented in my appearance streaming with his white chakara and looking at me with his ice cold eyes. A smirk crept over his face.

"Let me take control over your body, I'll make sure you'll be satisfied." He sniggered sinisterly, his laugh echoed in the empty space.

"Of course not! Give the control back to me! You don't own this body!"

Suddenly my dark double appeared in front of me clenching my throat with his cold hands. My double leaned forward, whispering to my ear with a growl.

"I feel so much fear in you. You are pathetically weak. Let me tell you, I've always been present in your body."

I whimpered.

"Oh, yes, since the very beginning. I'm your hatred towards society, friends, lovers and family. Thanks to our journey here, I've become substantial and powerful. Unconsciously you kept on feeding this hatred until I was powerful enough to take control over your body. How pathetic you humans are creating bonds that so easily can be torn apart."

The grip of my double's hand tightened, preventing proper passage of oxygen. The demon growled with laughter.

"Feeling like giving up already? That is good so, then I'll have less problem to execute my plan."

"What kind of plan?"

The demon sniggered.

"I thought Kakashi told you already, I'm planning to dominate the world when I get the scroll, but since I've got the son who embodies the true power of the scroll, I'll tempt him to pour his seed into me."

I blushed at his words, but recoiled with fear. The demon was actually wanting that I unite with Ronen, but why…?

"Soon as his seed is present in me which carries his DNA, inevitably the power of the scroll and my power will merge and I'll be finally able to shut you away for good, ha ha!" he spoke with triumph and sniggered evilly.

Suddenly Kakashi's face flashed in front of my eyes, all his faces from lazy, cheerful to lazy and serious, then appeared my family all smiling. An electric shock went down my body and as a response, I rammed my hand through my double's stomach and he gasped with the air knocked out of him. His grip relaxed around my neck, new power flowed through my body, growing and growing against the diminishing power from the demon.

"Who's weak now!" I triumphed against my double's shocked stiff figure.

"Do you seriously think I'll let a demon take over me and let a man, whom I do not love, make love to me? I'll show who's boss around here!" I declared sharply and retrieved my hand.

My double fell numbly to the floor, staring wide eyed and then like an explosion his body scattered and evaporated. I looked at my hand, I expected blood but there was none and I smirked to myself. As long as I am determined and have people I treasure, not even a demon could stop me. I closed my eyes and briskly I was back to the world.

I was bathing in sweat and panting furiously. Ronen's hot and sweating figure still overpowered mine, his bare chest glittering with sweat brushed against my body and his thundering heart beats scared me. His hand glided up my legs from underneath my Yukata. My Yukata had opened itself through his activity, my shoulders were bare and my chest was soon exposed. Through digging my finger nails in his shoulders and struggling against him to push him off, I called with a strangled voice.

"Ronen, please stop!"

He stopped in his movements and raised his flushed desire-filled face.

"I cannot stop, not until I make you mine." He said with a hoarse voice and abruptly pulled my Yukata down revealing my bare chest. With a shriek I covered myself, but Ronen gripped both of my hands with one of his hands and forced them above of my head in the pillow. I whimpered fearfully and the tears streamed down my face. To repress the whimpering and resisting struggles, he crashed his lips on me. He engulfed my lips savagely, it wasn't him anymore and I suspected that the power within in him was also steering him to do such things or was it his own desires? His tongue lashed over my shut lips, giving me the desire to get sick. His bare chest rubbing against my own bare chest filled me with such dread and insanity to kill this guy. My strength began to slowly come back and I tried to kick him off, but his legs and body could hinder it successfully. While he savagely devoured my lips, his one hand crept up my body and brushed one area, which caused me to jerk and shriek in his mouth. I wanted him to stop even if it meant to kill him, I couldn't hold out any longer! Please, help me! Anybody help me, Kakashi HELP ME!!

All of a sudden Ronen collapsed on me and stopped moving. I quivered with my heart beating insanely and panting fearfully, my sight was blurred by the tears. What happened? I tried finding what did this, what caused Ronen to collapse like this. I was too weak to do this. Then Ronen's body was rolled off of me and I lay completely exposed to the ceiling. Beside the bed stood Kakashi, angry and horrified of my state. I briskly got up, not caring the slightest that my Yukata had slipped off entirely revealing my bare chest and I jumped to my feet and threw myself into Kakashi's arms. Without hesitating he enveloped me in his arms and I cried in his chest. His warm chest and strong arms gave me comfort and security. I didn't care of anything anymore! I just wanted Kakashi to hold me, to take me away from this insane place, away from that animal!

"Did this guy do this to you?" he asked me, angered by my state.

I nodded during my hiccoughing and stammering sobs, I was so traumatised. However when Kakashi decided to hug me even tighter, his hand came in contact with my shoulder, abruptly my mind flashed the scenes from the bed. I could still feel every single touch and heat from Ronen, hear his rasping breaths and see his lustful face. I was so scared, so frightened of everything even of Kakashi who held me tightly in arms. I wanted to stay away from everybody. I started struggling against Kakashi, I was panic stricken and I tried shoving him away.

"Let go of me! Stop it, don't touch me anymore!"

Kakashi was strong to resist my panicked attempt to push him away. I trembled so violently and all my strength was gone, it was impossible to escape and my entire body was once again paralyzed.

"Sara, calm down! It's over!"

Even if he said that it still did not calm me down. All men were like this, bunch of animals! I just wanted to run away, away from all this pain and misery. I whimpered and sobbed, helplessly trying to push Kakashi away. Then very harshly Kakashi embraced me and he shouted with such desperation and concern that his voice sounded strangled.

"Sara, it's me Kakashi! I would never hurt you! I would never make you cry like this, even never lay a finger on you, as long as I live!" his shaking arms and voice filled with desperation and concern, gradually took effect on me.

My struggling ceased so as my fear and my whimpering. I was beginning to see clearly, the trauma was still there but I was coming back to my senses so that I was able to distinguish where I was. My grip which clenched Kakashi's shirt relaxed and my breathing slowed so did my heart. My muscles relaxed and exhaustedly I leaned against Kakashi with my knees feeling like jelly. Nevertheless the tears still rolled down my cheeks, the reality was too horrible to bear.

"He nearly-he nearly…" I strangled, realizing the horror of what Ronen did.

"He touched me…every where. I still can feel his touches, his breath, his lips and how he forced me down." I told Kakashi with horror and a trembling voice.

Then I burst in tears.

"We weren't us anymore, something terribly wrong happened, I don't know what! I just know I was so sacred!..."

Kakashi held me even tighter and planted several kisses on my head to console me, his voice was so desperate, concerning and caring.

"Its okay, Sara, I'm here I'll protect you no matter what! I will make sure that nothing like that ever happens again, I promise you! I won't let anybody hurt you! This guy will pay for the pain he caused you!"

Some anger was evident in his statement. Behind my sorrowful mask, an affectionate smile cracked against Kakashi's chest. I was grateful to hear him say this, glad that he was consoling me in his arms. I was so happy to be in his arms, to be surrounded by his warmth and his soothing voice. Dear God, please make this moment last forever, give me the chance to be cradled in his arms, give me a moment to feel loved and cared for. Kakashi's arms relaxed, but he still held me as if his life depended on it. Finally the haze that clouded my mind was clearing and instantly I became sharply aware how my bare skin rubbed against Kakashi's semi rough clothed body. After all I bounced into his arms with only a slip on! My body felt so filthy from my sweat and Ronen's, combined with my tears and I realized how much I reeked. Overall I felt very nasty, not that I was saved in the last minute before getting raped, but the fact that my demon stimulated Ronen to push his feelings to the extreme. My crying had ceased a long time ago and Kakashi held me quietly and patiently, it seemed he was unwilling to let me go.

"Uhm, Kakashi." I muttered and he did not respond.

"I'm actually nearly naked."

"…"

Kakashi was motionless, I couldn't detect the slightest movement or sound coming from him. It was like he turned to a statue of rock, holding me so closely and dearly. My hands that were clasped behind his back, one of them climbed up his back up to his neck and placed itself against the back of his head. I patted, caressed his head, while keeping an affectionate smile against his chest. My heart fluttered with delight. Was his silence an act for showing that he was deeply worried about me? Or did he want to show some guilt? I don't know what took me, but I turned my head aside where his face hung low over my shoulders, his face was hidden in part by his mask and the shade of his silver hair. I planted gently a kiss on his right clothed cheek.

"Thank you for saving me again; I don't know how I can express my gratitude for your care." I expressed in a gentle and quiet voice.

Abruptly he released me and walked passed me to the bed. I stood rooted at the same spot, confused of his sudden coldness. Not once did he glance at me, he treated me like I was thin air. Realizing that my chest was openly exposed, I clasped my arms over my bare chest. In a movement, the feather light weight of my Yukata was draped over my shoulders.

"Put it on." He instructed me briefly, keeping a cool voice.

What got him suddenly, what's this sudden switch of mood? I put my Yukata properly on, concealing my body very well and I remained standing in the same place with my back towards the bed. A vague idea floated in my mind what probably caused his behaviour, though I was quite uncertain about it, but before I could rethink a way to say, I spoke out calmly yet gently.

"Kakashi, it doesn't hurt if you express concern, it only tells me you are human."

There was a pause, I felt like I was talking only to myself, since Kakashi didn't make a single sound or movement. Unexpectedly Kakashi embraced me from behind, pulling me against his chest and lowering his face, nearly touching my shoulder. I was rapt by his bold and unpredictable action that it rendered me speechless.

"Thank goodness you are okay, because you gave me the scare of my life." He whispered with emotional relief.

My heart jumped with a startle. Did I hear right? Did he just say that he was extremely concerned about me? I couldn't speak, disbelieved of the words that came out of him.

"I'm sorry I didn't come in time to prevent the worst, can you forgive?" this time his voice was gentle yet bitter with remorse.

For a split second I thought he was going to cry, but shook my head at that ridiculous thought. My hand raised itself and found itself on his cheek. I smiled with delight.

"At least you came to my rescue that's the most important. You don't have to ask for forgiveness."

His hand hesitantly placed upon my own which was on his cheek. The sensation that was stimulated by the contact of his hand on my own sent a fluttering sensation in the pit of my stomach and a peaceful ease that I've felt when Kakashi and I nearly kissed. His hand that held mine on his cheek, he brought it over to his clothed mouth and kissed it. I blushed profusely and my heart skipped a beat, what-what-what was he doing?!

"Forgive me." He breathed against my hand and before I could react, I felt a sudden but swift strike against the back of my neck.

I fell down crashing into the bottomless pit of darkness, which engulfed all my senses mercilessly.


	27. Chapter 26

**Hiya^^ It's been a while... I needed some rest due to some emotional crisis... You know I got such a bad flame that it actually made me question about my story (don't worry I am not pissed, I am actually pretty calm, although I admit I was pissed when I saw it, but I am okay now^^) So I hope you don't mind, but I'll try to clarify some issues about my story.**

**Now where do I start... ah yes, right: The thing about Mary Sue, look, it's been like more than a year since I had an account on Fanfictionnet and since it isn't the center of my world or my life, I know little about the expression people use, esp. the Mary sue thing. I heard a vague explanation about what it meant, but Sara, doesn't suffer of that syndrom okay. She's well educated, well raised, has got sufficent morals which our world lack, she may have lot of people liking her, she may have some times a cheezy way of thinking or saying things, she may be sway between liking guys because there is always a good SOLID reason for it, namely her demon. **

**Honestly speaking when I wrote this story I didn't consider or bloody hell thought about the "Mary Sue" thing. I created this character, Sara (she's a part of me) and Ronen from my imagination, my dreams, my desire. I mean all of you should know that, you write the unimaginable, you make your characters better or worse or sometimes so supernatural than yourself, its like a imagination "release", do you catch my drift? In the end you don't give a damn about the actual exsistence of "Mary Sue" and what's so wrong about her anyway? It's my style if some things sound cheezy or philosophic, but it hugely depends whether its a character's perspective and Sara, is complex, melodramatic at times.**

**Sigh. About Kakashi. Look... it's not easy to keep a character in character, especially Kakashi. I thought of him - he reads from his favourite orange books- that he's perverted and could be so unpredictable at times which litterally made my head spin. It was really hard, believe me. I am not Kishimoto, okay. Kakashi is a real enigma which would even make Sherlock Holmes run in circles. This story was kind of an experiment for me, you know. I inserted Sara, to discover through her, who Kakashi really is. I stumbled across so many impressions, emotions, feelings which led me to write all their scenes together, so it's inevitable that he changes because he discovers his serious liking for her. People change, they don't stay the same. But if you discovered some OOCness in Kakashi, then forgive me, remember though that i worked my ass off for this story. **

**Another thing... I heard some of you are probably confused about Sara's liking or love towards "Steve". I don't mind clarifying this. Myself I did notice my story doesn't highlight her relationship to Steve. In one way Steve is an another obstacle which prevents her from fully loving Kakashi and in the other way Steve's a simple old crush. I didn't want to emphasis too much, because I presented it like this purposely. If I'd make another lover, all of you guys would grow sick and tiered and drop my story completely (poor Ronen suffered that fate, sniff) Anyway it means their relationship, Steve and Sara, isn't that significant but Sara unconsciously uses "steve" as a shield to protect herself from unrequited love since he died (in a plane crash actually) before she could tell how much she loved him. Myself I made a rather cruel interpretation of Steve's role in my story, Steve needed to be sacrificed in order for Sara to meet Kakashi, a person she could fully, I mean really deeply and passionately, love.**

**Lastly but not least, the delight in writing. It's my first story which I published on fanfiction net and I have written many fanfics in my life, but my focus is writting novels and hopefully publishing them. Now, I am no professional, not perfect but one thing I know is when you take delight in your own writting it is bound to be reflected in the readers. I love this story, I TRULY AND DEEPLY LOVE THIS STORY AND I AM SO DAMN PROUD OF IT!!!!!!!!!!!! Somehow I write for myself as well, because I am a ticking bomb filled with painfully-eternal-causing-sleepless-nights inspiration and imagination. It's difficult to know what the readers like, they're billions of you guys out there, I can't know what all of you like, if i did know, then I would be God.**

**Anyhow, I am not angry and am sorry if any of this sounded bitter, I tried not to really. I am not trying to kill you with my story, I like to drag it a little further, to build the suspense and the climax is at the end, so bear with me.... Gosh sorry, that is the longest feedback I have given to you, but I really wanted to clarify things and I really don't like spoiling things by telling you what happens in the next chapters, it's more fun like this and I know they're are impatient people out there, so please bear with me, okay? And thanks for all reviews, they are motivating, so in the future bombard me with lots of them if you want me to update fast, oki?^^**

**Love you all and feel free to ask questions if you need clarifications. Here you go, ta daaaaaa!!!**

**

* * *

  
**

**CHAPTER TWENTY SIX**

- Unforeseen change followed by the final battle against the Fuhei clan-

I woke up from my bed with a start at the threatening sound of a jeering crowd. I realized that I was back in my former room and that the sound came from outside where the balcony window stood wide open. I jumped out of bed and dashed to the balcony. My eyes met a horrible sight; in the courtyard a group of jeering young men encircled one bloody and injured person. All of them were bullying that person mercilessly with strike of fists or feet, some took even a wooden branch to inflict more pain on that victim. The worst thing was, the victim's silvery hair gleamed with blotches of blood and seemed to refuse to fight. Only one individual with his torso bare and gleaming with sweat underneath the sun set, stood across of the victim. I recognized that it was Ronen and the victim was without a doubt Kakashi. Ronen advanced towards Kakashi and kicked him in the face. Shocked by this brutality, my muscles tensed with anger and I wanted to jump down my balcony to kick those guys' dead, but restrained myself to do that and instead dashed out of the room.

I traversed the long corridors, turned sharply over some corners nearly knocking over some maids and servants. With fiery determination I ran and ran. Finally I reached the ground floor and at the far end of the spacious corridor shone the main exit and entrance of the building. However when I was close to the main entrance a barricade of servants formed and instead of slowing down I broke through them, propelling them to the side with my impact. I stood on the porch and the men spun their heads to the source of the commotion.

"Stop it Ronen!" I shouted and ran out to them.

Ronen noticed me but drew his attention back to Kakashi. I ran around the circle to get a better look from the side. I've never witnessed Kakashi beaten up to this state, he was on his knees and his wrists were bound behind his back, he looked at me with a reassuring face. The men grabbed me from either side to hold me back.

"Ronen, don't do this, he didn't do anything!" I shouted and struggled myself free from their grips but it was in vain.

"He tried to kill me!" retorted Ronen coldly and looked down on Kakashi.

I gaped with horror at Kakashi and he looked over at me with a solemn face. So that means…Kakashi knocked me out in order to get angry at Ronen? I looked at Kakashi. I didn't need to ask only by the look of his gentle uncovered eye, revealed to me his intention. Nonetheless both of us knew this wasn't according to the plan that Kakashi would be nearly beaten to death or that I would be nearly raped. By looking at him with scowl I scolded him for acting foolishly, but he kept his gentle face as if it was his last. It was like he was indirectly saying "It couldn't be helped" and suddenly Kakashi's face was kicked to the side.

"Stop staring at my bride, you filth! I'm sure you did something to her that made her reject me this morning!" he snarled furiously at Kakashi and then his cold eyes met mine.

"And you just let this filth take advantage of you! I'm not stupid to guess what you both did alone in the room! But anyway this man is to blame for everything, if you never had appeared none of this would have happened!" From scolding me he drew his attention back to Kakashi, anger flowed through him and I could sense the demoniac chakara boiling in him.

He was preparing his fist, the chakara seeped out of his hand. Ronen was preparing for a fatal punch and Kakashi was back on his knees his face lowered. He gave me a last glance, knowing that death was near, affection reflected in his face. I gasped in disbelief. I looked over at Ren he walked over to Kakashi, keeping a small distance between them. Ronen's right hand glowed with a fiery red chakara with the similar appearance as the chidori of Kakashi and Sasuke's, only that it was hazardous and maybe deadly. I wanted to shout to Kakashi to tell him to fight, because hell he wasn't even bothering to put up a fight which was totally out-of-character?! Kakashi's gaze left me and he looked back at Ronen.

"Give your best shot, you piece of shit!"

Ronen growled and readied his fist by pulling his fist back to get a run-up. Ronen smirked coldly at Kakashi.

"You'll regret that you ever set foot in here! **YAAAA**!" his fist began to soar towards Kakashi and I screamed and vanished into thin air and reappeared in a split second in front of Kakashi with my arms outstretched, welcoming the attack.

Kakashi's shouts were inaudible to me; I was focused on the sizzling soaring demoniac fist, which Ronen tried to stop after he saw me. It hit me in the stomach with such a strong impact that I was propelled backwards at such a speed that I smashed against the bleached walls ten meters away from everybody. I burst through the wall and landed flat on my back on the street outside of the Fuhei residence. Cracks began to spread where I burst through and the wall collapsed revealing a 2 meter gap entrance for anybody. The air was knocked out of me entirely and I felt that all my bones were shattered in my body and by the blood oozing from my mouth I could tell that my organs were severely damaged. My sight which was fixed to the orangey, pinkish sky of the sunset began to become hazy - my world was beginning to fade away.

I smiled to myself; at least I could experience love although once again it was unrequited. When I thought all hope was lost and death was welcoming me, a sudden surge of power did something to my body. My body began to ache furiously, it felt like I dropped inside a pool of lava, the mending of bones the repairing of my organs, was hellish! My sight was coming back to me and a growling voice echoed.

**"_Do you think I'll hand you over to the dead, when I haven't succeeded dominating you?"_**

"Shut up, bastard! It's still my body!" I retorted and I got up on my feet.

My neck was broken and my head hung down my back like a hood. My body staggered on its feet, from far I was sure I looked like the headless rider. As my body staggered blindly forward to the ruins, my body bent back and catapulted my head back forward snapping my neck back in place. All of a sudden I was stopped by a hand. I turned around and found Akai on the street with a hand full of clothes and my shinobi apparels.

"I think you'll need that."

I looked at him and smirked. I took the clothes off of his hands and went to a corner to change myself. Later I reappeared dressed in my shinobi clothes, Akai was gone from the scene. I stood in front of the rubble then peered over it. Ronen was on his knees, his fists holding him up and looking devastated at his actions and Kakashi looked even more depressed than any of them, his shocked and devastated face stared at the rubble with so much pain. All of a sudden Kakashi ripped his ropes with such strength and charged with full power towards Ronen by kicking him in the face. Ronen propelled by rolling backwards until he reached the porch. His nose bled profusely and Kakashi panted angrily.

"What else are you going to take from me?!" he shouted with such rage that he bluntly attacked Ronen, but the Fuhei members jumped in to stop Kakashi. A fight broke out, ten against one.

I watched this with disbelief and shock, Kakashi never would lose his nerves in battle no matter what. I've never seen him driven by such anger. Apparantly he realized that he was losing so in a puff of smoke he vanished, leaving the fighting men looking around in bewilderment. I hid myself in the nearby dark corner. Attacking the Fuhei's still in day time was unwise, so I retreated in the corner, lurking there until the night broke.

The sky was starless and no moon was visible. The night was so silent and windless, nothing moved or lived. It emphasised again the death hanging over the Fuhei residence. Quietly I climbed up the nearby building and kept myself in the shadow, fortunately my shinobi outfit camouflaged very well with the darkness. In the shadow I watched over the Fuhei residence. It gave an air of hostility, I was sure that they were also getting prepared for a fight. Kakashi was no where to be seen nor could I sense him anywhere nearby. After experiencing a near death twice I've realized how much I wanted to accomplish still and one thing is sure to accomplish this mission meant getting rid of any obstacles that stood in my way. I need to kill. The very thought of it didn't shake any disgust or reasons; instead I remained cold, like I've changed into a new Sara that lost its emotions. Although it was still my real self controlling my body, still the experience in the Fuhei residence made me become cold. I had this bubbling hatred to hurt all of them, mostly Ronen who made me and Kakashi suffer and not to mention who killed me. The clan and Kakashi are unaware that I survived and it should remain this way.

I took forth the mask and slipped it over my head. It covered everything except for my eyes. I strapped two shinobi apparels around my waist and another around my right thigh. I sat there crouching in the shadow of the dark corner, observing like an owl its prey that lies motionlessly before him. I waited and waited until it became really dark. It was time. I descended the roof and landed silently on the ground and sneaked furtively to the entrance of the Fuhei residence. With my night vision, I found no one near the entrance outside and I found it suspicious. When I jumped on the rubble no guards were posted there and then I merged with the near greens of the residence. I watched from behind some bushes, but no sight of any guards or individuals. I crept through the forestage around the main building of the Fuhei. Finally I spotted some guards, they were guarding the dojo. On each surface guarded two to three guards and the main entrance stood a strong muscular guy. I couldn't enter this not without attracting their attention, I crept away from the dojo and went back to the starting point.

I couldn't see another way in, when suddenly I spotted the opening of my old room. The window stood wide open. For some reason I thought it was a trap, but it was worth a try. I looked for a tall tree and found one across the courtyard lining against the wall. I ran over the empty space, crouched and whizzing to the other side. I jumped to the main bough then jumped from branch to another until I reached the peak. I've arrived to the second roof and I had two more to go. Putting enormous pressuring down on my heels I jumped and landed on the second roof and then on the third one, gripping the roof with my hands. I swung myself to the balcony and landed softly with one knee touching the floor. I pulled out my kunai and closed my eyes to concentrate, a lot of chakara from individuals were present and the smell was also indicating it. They were well prepared but not well prepared for me.

With a smirk I pulled out three black balls and walked over to the slit of the sliding window. I rolled the balls through the split and it exploded. Coughs and alarmed voices broke out and I took that as my queue and pulled the door open and dashed in. In the fog of smoke I could with ease, kill off one by one by gutting them or slitting their throats. The fog, my speed and night vision were greatly underestimated, blood splashed all over the place not missing me once. Mercilessly and silently I killed them all. Within minutes all were dead, twenty of them I killed. I stood still looking over at the door, the killing of people did not shake me the slightest. I walked over to the door and slowly unlocked the door.

The hallway was swimming in thick darkness, but it didn't bother me since I had my night vision. At the far end were some presences. I concentrated the chakara in my feet and climbed up the high walls until I walked along the ceiling and stood above their heads. There were ten of them grouped kneeled down, ready to strike. I took out two kunais and let myself drop on them. I stabbed two men on their backs and retrieved my kunais to turn like a cyclone to cuts several throats of the men. Cries filled the hallway; aid was on the way for those who called for help. It sounded like a stampede. I conjured ten shadow clones to facilitate the task, soon as the stampede came rushing through the dark hallways. My clones without hesitating killed them like a lawn mover cutting down the grass. I've killed half of the clan.

Fifty of them were dead and worst of all of them were extremely weak. So it meant that it was a lie that everybody possessed some of the power of the scroll, it was a scheme to scare off the opponents, how pathetic! I dissolved my clones and walked along the corridor, as I turned into one corner I was badly surprised by shurikens. They grazed my legs and shoulders and one was embedded in my shoulder. Then a jet of Senbons flew to me, grazing my skin but also piercing through my skin. I gasped stumbling backwards. The lights were instantly turned on which momentarily blinded me. The source of the Senbons and shurikens came from other bunch men, clad in some odd shinobi attire. They sniggered and cheered with triumph.

However suddenly I ripped out the shuriken embedded in my shoulder and threw it towards one guy, who failed to dodge the shuriken and fell over with a gush of blood squirting from his injured but fatal wound. The blood gushed over his companions who all cried with horror. I pulled out the Senbons one by one while advancing the group, when I had ten bloody Senbons in my hands I threw them all with such ferocity that ¾ of the group fell over with a Senbons stuck in their head. I picked out some more of the Senbons that were planted in my body and threw them to the remainders who died instantly with a Senbons stuck to their throat. I walked over the pile of reeking and bleeding corpses without the faintest regard. All the killing went on until I reached the ground floor.

The ground floor was silent and the lights were still on. The light illuminated my figure splattered with blood across my face and my black attires. My emotions were out cold, I couldn't feel anything whatsoever, not the tiniest remorse or warmth. I just walked, killing off all obstacles. Barricading the exit of the main building that would lead to the Dojo, stood maids servants and the left-over loyal Fuhei followers.

One maid cried with a fry pan in her hand.

"We won't let you pass!"

"You'll be long dead before you exit this room."

I didn't utter a word; I just pulled out two kunais and charged towards them without remorse. Agonizing cries and shrieks filled the halls, bodies dropping to the ground with the blood gushing out of their wounds, their unrequited pleas for mercy ignored and savagely slaughtered. One maid bleeding from a fatal wound gripped my feet, but when I gave her my coldest look, she died away. I kicked her hand away with repulsion and loath. None of them lived. Now I stood on the porch that was connected to the entrance of the Dojo. Nobody guarded the entrance to the Dojo and I simply walked over the porch.

All of a sudden, I was ambushed from all directions, all guards thrust their weapons into my body. I gave an agonizing groan, the men held their weapons firmly against my body, preventing me to move any further. Then I sniggered as if all this tickled and abruptly pulled out one of the guard's weapons and swung it around, killing its former owner. The guards were shocked of me that some recoiled out of fear. I walked around with the weapons still thrust in my body. I pulled one katana out and jammed it through its former owner. I killed all of them one by one with their own weapons. All guards that guarded the Dojo were slain.

I took one fire lamp and threw it into the main house, the metal stand clanged and rolled spilling the oil all over the wooden floor until it reached some fabric and started burning viciously. The flames devoured the fabric within seconds catching fire to fragile wood. I took the other stand and threw it even deeper into the main house. The flames mounted the walls inside the main house, urging me to walk to the door of the dojo. When I got a hold of the door I brusquely tore them open. Revealing two startled persons, one was Ronen and the other the leader who looked at me more terrified than anybody else. Ronen turned around, self-confidence reflected in his face.

"You have finally come to steal our scroll, but I have to disappoint because you won't get through me that easily."

I did not respond but glared at him.

"Oh, you aren't so talkative, but don't worry words aren't necessary in a fight."

Too suddenly he stood in front of me and punched me in the guts send me soaring, blowing a part of the Dojo apart. I soared but landed then in the courtyard on my feet. Ronen, who watched me from the hole of the Dojo, then reappeared seconds later in the courtyard across of me. I could tell he was very strong but still not strong enough to defeat me. Smoke and fumes climbed up the sky. Ronen didn't pay the slightest attention to his burning residence, his main interest was me.

"I never thought you could eliminate my entire clan in such a short time, which means that you are really strong."

My mouth wouldn't open only my gaze was communicating to him and it told him how much I despised him. Ronen laughed with conceit.

"You're right talking is annoying, let's get started then."

He charged towards me with enthusiasm and growing self-confidence. He tried punching me kicking me and other attacks, but I dodge them easily. I could sense that he was physically strong, his kicks and punches were streaming with this demoniac chakara. One of his punch I lacked the time to dodge it so I blocked by catching it with my hand. A surge of electricity shocked my entire arm, burning it and I grunted with pain and withdrew my arm and flipped backwards to take some distance. I observed my hand and it was scalded. I looked at his arms and back at my hand.

"The demoniac power allows me to burn my opponents until they become roasted."

I merely stared at him with indifference; I had to get rid of him immediately. I charged towards him, attacking him with punches and kicks. My anger grew so strong that it stimulated my demon's chakara to pulse through my system. For the first time in my rational mind, or so I thought, I did need his help and I was determined to finish off Ronen for good. However my demon surged into my body, taking over my body and shoving me aside.

**"**_**Let me take care of this, it'll be a great pleasure."** Growled the voice now through my lips, feeling lustful for blood and the kill._

Ronen looked at me confused yet aware of something about my body. I was sure that he realized something different in my allure, since my demon took over.

"When I'm done with you, there will be nothing left of you." I purred sounding horrifyingly aroused of the thought that I could kill and bathe in his blood.

Claws grew from my nails, long and sharp ones and I stormed towards him. Ronen was bewildered and seemed not to know how to attack me. I crashed on him, assaulting him with powerful kicks and punches which none he missed. Then I concentrated my chakara into one fist while clutching him by his collar and punched him powerfully in his guts so that he propelled back to the house, tearing down walls with him as he smashed through them.

The whole house rattled and shook and it began to crumble down, even if it did that I still walked over to search for Ronen. I found him grunting in the corner, his head bleeding and the blood dripping from his mouth. I grabbed him by his collar and pulled him up until his feet hovered over the ground. In one flick he soared back unto the courtyard and crashed to the ground. I jumped out of the rattling and crumbling building and landed across of Ronen's lying figure. Ronen managed to utter.

"What are you?"

"Not any different to you, but only more powerful."

Ronen's eyes went wide.

"Pathetic humans, they think by absorbing a part of a demon's power that they can become one whole one?"

"So that means you are…"

"Yes, I am one; I am Fujin the water and thunder demon."

"Then who does this body belong to?"

I sniggered, my true side was telling the demon not to say a thing and he complied since it amused him to be so superior.

"I live in the body of a human in order to survive, this person decided to let me get control over her body so that I can finish you off without mercy."

Ronen sat up and leaned against the debris his face lowered revealing only a smile.

"You can kill me, I don't care anyway. My life is cursed by this demon power and I've got nothing to lose anyway." He spoke melancholic, which caused my demon to lose some of the control over my body.

"I've lost everything, friends, family and the ones I loved, only because of that cursed scroll!"

The control of my body was fading; the demon was getting weaker by the affection that came from Ronen's words. Then it burst out of my mouth and I crashed to my knees shouting:

"SHUT UP! SHUT UP WITH YOU AND YOUR HUMAN BONDS!!"

My demon desperately pulled out a kunai, I screamed at the demon to stop but with his last desperate strength the kunai moved towards Ronen. He just looked at it coming with a smile. I screamed at the demon to stop and as a response closed my eyes, the kunai jammed itself into flesh and the hot blood splattered all over my hands and face. When I opened my eyes I saw that the kunai did not hit Ronen in the chest instead it was embedded in somebody else's shoulder. It quivered with pain and I looked up gasping in horror at whom it belonged to. Akai's now unbandaged face showed a painful expression and behind me, a person's arms held me like a fork lifter. My hands fell off the kunai handle and I watched with horror at what I did.

"You should have waited for us, instead of stealing the whole show." Said the familiar voice behind me.

"Kakashi?" I croaked with disbelief.

"Yup, that's me."

I lowered my face than abruptly broke free from him and stepped away from the group. Akai removed the kunai from his shoulder and moved away from Ronen who stared at us with bewilderment. His gaze lingered mostly on Akai. Kakashi looked at me with earnest; I felt he was ready to stop me if my demon took possession.

"You killed the entire clan?" questioned Kakashi and I looked at him with indifference.

"Yes, all of them, except for the son and the leader."

Kakashi looked at me, actually horrified of my actions. He never expected in his wildest imagination that I was capable of such a thing.

"Did you set fire to the building too?" questioned Akai also gravely.

I nodded, and then Kakashi blurted out:

"Why kill the entire clan, they couldn't do anything about it!?"

I gave an ironic smirk.

"I had to, isn't the Mizukage asking for their elimination? So I did it, now comes the scroll…"

I turned over to the Dojo.

"You two came too late to stop me. Now let me finish my job."

Before Kakashi could say a word or stop me I vanished and reappeared at the entrance of the dojo. However I was forced up against the wall by Kakashi's grunt.

"Sara! Have you lost your mind?! What has gotten into you, killing everybody even the innocent servants and maids?" Kakashi demanded with fury and I remained unmoved.

"They were in my way."

Kakashi's voice died and he stared blankly at me, the horror and disbelief visible in his features. I knew for a fact that the usual Kakashi in an assissination mission or any mission wouldn't let his emotions or feelings intervene, however all emotions which he pent up all his life seemed to flood out of his system as he encountered me: a cold blooded assassin with barely any warmth left in himself. He was by all means, by all honesty disturbed of how all this turned out. It appeared to me that my sudden change roused the shocking impact of guilt, the fact that he taught me to become like this, to act like this.

"Still we weren't ordered to wipe out the entire clan!" shouted Kakashi defensively, his voice had become strangled from the surge of emotions.

"Like you've taught me, I should regard myself as a tool for mission and disregard emotions."

Kakashi re-froze in disbelief and horror. His words which had been hammered in my head have been thrown back at him, smothering him with the fact that his words, his actions, his teachings have affected me more than it should have. Most importantly he couldn't believe that the once warm hearted Sara, transformed into some killing machine. My cold eyes looked at him, unmoved by the slightest. Suddenly a cold kunai brushed along my throat held by Kakashi, who tried keeping me forced against the wall and prevent me to go.

"I'll kill you if you go." He threatened with his eyes glaring at me although his eyes gleaming with emotional instability.

"Go ahead. Slit my throat, shatter my bones, I'll always come back to life as long as my demon dwells in me."

Kakashi knew that, since I was still alive after that fatal attack from Ronen, he couldn't stop me; however he remained there still firmly forcing me against the wall with his shuddering furious breaths against my face.

"I want to put an end to all of this, now let me pass!" then I kicked him against his stomach so that he crashed into the forestage of the garden.

I walked over to one of the bodies and pulled the katana from its body. Its blood dripped along the floor as I walked to the wide open door. The leader stood shaking from head to toe in front of the stand where the scroll was placed, obviously trying to protect it. He had a katana in his shaking hand.

"I won't let you pass!" he declared strongly with his voice shaking.

With a swing I shook the blood off the sword and looked at the man coldly.

"Do you think I'll let you live after all the pain you inflicted upon your members, even upon your own son?! After ruining so many lives, exterminating innocent babies one after another and destroying relationships and punishing them by sacrificing them to that demoniac scroll?! Do you call yourself a leader, after committing such hideous and atrocious acts? You merit a slow but painful death and I'll make sure of that!" I declared with such rage that I charged towards him.

He was frozen to his spot and only whimpered and shouted insanely with dread. With my katana I rammed him through several times like a savage tormenting a boar by piercing it several times. Then I gave the final stroke and I landed on my feet just behind him. His bleeding body stood still for a moment, but then blood gushed from his neck and his head slipped off his shoulders and landed with a thud to the floor. His body followed collapsing on the wooden floor and wheezing with blood. It's over with the Fuhei clan, the last battle was fought and all were slain...By me.


	28. Chapter 27

**Heya again!!! Thanks for ALL your awesome reviews, you guys have no idea how happy this made me!! XD I hope you enjoy this chapie and +/- reviews and questions are always welcome^^ Oh! I nearly forgot to mention, man-oh-man, did y'all check the latest chapie of Naruto Shippuden?!? KAKASHI IS PROBABLY GOING TO DIEEEEEE!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! IF HE DOES DIE I WILL BE MOURNING FOR HIM, SNIFFF!! :'( Anyway, on with the show^^

* * *

**

**CHAPTER TWENTY SEVEN**

- The cursed scroll takes its true form, the battle begins -

The silence was enormous. Now in front of me stood the metal stand and the chained scroll. In a swing of the katana the blood brushed off and I stood there looking at the scroll. My mind was full of hatred. This thing was to blame for all the misery! I refused the thought to bring it back to Konoha, instead I preferred destroying it. I took forth my katana and hovered the blade over the streaming scroll. I raised it high skyward with my both hands gripping the handle of the katana firmly. I glared at the scroll.

"I'm going to destroy you for good, you damned scroll, even if I have to sacrifice my life!"

Then I slashed the scroll with such strength that it broke in two. Suddenly a blazing beam of light erupted exploding the ceiling over itself and the beam shot up to the sky. There was a moment of silence and darkness. However there was a distant but nearing buzzing and whizzing coming over my head and before I could dodge, the beam struck me like lightening, electrocuting me. I bellowed with such agony at the imaginable pain. The beam surrounded me like a large circle of fire. The dojo shook and rattled, like a powerful earth quake.

Instantly I landed back into the white space, cut off from the reality, away from the pain and vibration. Further ahead, stood two gigantic and ferocious animals facing each other ready to pounce. One was a great deal smaller than the other. The small one looked like a water tiger, it's appearance had the colour of the water a pale blue and white strips and its tail and paws literally took the shape of water. However its ears had a shape of some lighting bolts and like two antennas electricity zapped between them. The other animal, a great deal stronger, taller; positioned itself in a proud air, was a ferocious lion. Its mane and the tip of his bushy tail blazed wild flames. His body kept a red colour matching to the flames. It felt like I stepped into a "YU-GI-OH!" Monster duel.

The atmosphere was intense; both animals growled at each other and revealed their sharp threatening canines, they were ready to attack but something kept them back. I walked over to them and stopped two meters away from the centre of their boiling need to confront another. Both their blood thirsty eyes eyed me, then one spoke and who I recognized as my own demon.

"Well, well you have decided to be part of this."

"Yes I do, but can't you see this demon has also the same want as you to take over my body and rule the world."

My demon hissed reproachfully at me and the other demon merely eyed me. I smirked to myself.

"Both of you may be strong, but none of you will win."

Both demons roared at me and my demon stomp his paw on the ground sending some vibrations throughout the empty space and to make a point.

"Let me remind that I have saved you from death and made you invincible!"

"I'm aware of that and you can imagine how grateful I am, since…"

A remarkable smile crept over my face and I radiated at him.

"I've met the man of my life."

My demon recoiled and hissed aguishly like my affection was poisoning him.

"SHUT UP! I'll destroy those bonds even if it means that I should destroy you!" he roared and pounced on me, seizing me with his teeth half of my torso.

His teeth pierced through my flesh until I felt his upper and lower jaw meeting each other and rubbing against their teeth. The pain shot through my body, paralyzing it and the blood gushed out of my body. I spat blood and tried with my struggling hand to push him off. My demon growled savouring the taste of my blood and flesh and then like a filthy used toy or boring prey he threw me aside.

I rolled through the white floor, screeching like a tire over the smooth surface, leaving a smudged trail of blood. My eye sight became faint; I couldn't believe that I could get so severally hurt especially if it was inside of me. I reeked like blood and animal drool.

The left side of my body was paralyzed and slowly affected the right side of my body. With frustration and helplessness I clutched my fists, the tears came. Was I seriously going to die, leaving my body mercilessly in the hands of that demon who seeks revenge? I cried at my helplessness, at my fading strength and coldness enveloping me calling the death. But I cried mostly for the reason that I haven't told Kakashi that I loved him. Death lowered and lowered over me, my sight was fading and I was sure I couldn't escape it anymore. I felt the heavy footsteps of my demon, which lowered his head to look at me pitifully.

"You have been weak since the very beginning. Death has been impatiently waiting for you. You had since the very beginning no place in this world, you just smiled telling yourself everybody liked you, but can't you see? Your family abandoned you, Kakashi did as well, everybody has forgotten you."

His words made me heavier like lead, drawing death nearer and nearer at quick paces. In my mind I remembered all the evil in my life, all the disappointment, the betrayal the hatred.

"Steve left without giving you a chance to tell your feelings and Kakashi refuses whatsoever to acknowledge your feelings, aren't you angry at them? Don't you want to avenge on those who deliberately hurt you? …Than give me your body."

I was growing weaker, all the misery and anger urged death to arrive. My eyes shut themselves and I fell in the black abyss, which echoed the triumphing laugh of the demon. When darkness was about to engulf me entirely, a dazzling light shone, blazing an area in the darkness. It felt warm and so pleasing. I turned towards it, since it was the only comfortable and attractive thing in the whole darkness. The closer I came, the more familiar it was. Then like a bomb, pleasant memories rushed through my mind.

All the happy moments, from childhood until I reached Konoha. His words echoed through my mind, his warm, sometimes serious lazy and cheerful voice. Then his face flashed by the cheerful, serious and sometimes his ridiculous face. My mind seemed to pick the moments that I treasured the most, the times where Kakashi and I were close, the scene in the tent and other beautiful moments where we nearly kissed and when he hugged me from behind. I could hear the sound of his relieved voice saying that he was relieved to see me okay or telling me he was scared about what happened to me and also that he was asking for forgiveness. The tears poured from my eyes, I could feel this enormous longing stimulated by the love for Kakashi that it gave me strength to go back. Life could be colourful. I ran over to that blazing area, shouting.

"I want to go back; I want to go back to him!"

When I embraced that area, it merged with my body and illuminated the black abyss. I found myself soaring like a rocket out of the abyss. I woke up in the white space; my demon was blown away from the impact of my flaring power. The wounds sizzled like it was burning, mending themselves. I was back on my feet. I felt the demon's power being absorbed by my own and converted to this warm, affectionate power. The demon growled and pounced on me, but like a bug against the window, he bounced off from my invisible force field. He came back on his feet and I walked towards him, but stepped backwards aware of his fading power.

Then I stopped in my paces looked at the growling demon baring his sharp teeth, which also stopped moving. I looked at him with firmness, there was something telling me to defeat him, but there was something else urging me to forgive that demon. I contemplated while we stared at each other, then I choose without thinking and embraced the animal around his neck. It instantly ceased growling and froze.

"I'm sorry." I whispered gently, caressing its fur.

"I'm sorry to give you so much pain; you must've been so lonely in the dark." My tears came, feeling compassionate to that demon that suffered much.

Then the demoniac features melted away and I found myself embracing my dark double. She was still frozen stiff, mostly likely shocked out of her wits and feeling foreign to this situation. I consoled my dark side.

"I never meant to hurt you nor hate you. You are a part of me and have always been. I've torn you away from my good side and created you, this hatred towards everything only because I was hurt. I thought hatred would give me strength, but I realized that there is something stronger and enduring than hatred."

My double didn't speak only she stared wide-eyed in front of her.

"It's love and forgiveness. This positive strength goes beyond limits and creates bonds of love that strengthens you to overcome any obstacle, even if it's hatred, disappointment, betrayal, injustice and death. Love always prevails; it's the light of hope, our guide through our life. It shines on the importance of love, loyalty and forgiveness. Also love gives and forgets it has given."

I held my double in my arms and cried with compassion.

"I cannot imagine a life without family, friends and lovers. I cannot imagine hovering in the darkness feeding on the daily misery and hatred. I prefer dying than feeling this horrible loneliness!"

I pulled back and looked at my double, which looked at me still bewildered and shocked. Her dark and cold eyes were gradually changing, from dense to becoming clearer.

"Please, forgive me that I've excluded you and mistreated, but all along you were seeking for comfort and love."

My double's eyes widened, something was happening to her, like her true intentions behind were pouring out of her and the colour of her face returned.

"I am loved, we are loved! You aren't alone anymore, so please come back to me and I'll free you from these chains!"

My double looked at me; finally the tears brimming in her eyes and a grateful smile crept over her face. Myself I was moved that my demon was actually smiling and crying. Without a word, our bodies merged. When my double united with me, all bad memories came with her and I relived some of them. I stood there smiling compassionately. I understood his pain so well and realized how reckless I was to create such hatred for no reason, only to make me suffer more. Our powers merged, but my demons power was converted to this bright and warm strength.

Now I turned around to the other demon that stood there immobile during the whole event, he began to growl sensing that I was going to attack him. I charged towards him and he charged towards me as well and when my fist made contact with his head, my power shot through his body, cleansing his body from evil. He stumbled over and collapsed, his painful anguished cry echoed through the emptiness of the white space. He rolled and tossed, struggling to regain power over himself. It went on for several minutes and gradually it ceased fighting back, slowing giving in. Then the demon stopped and it spoke still through its friendly growling.

"Thank you for delivering us."

I rested my hand on its soft furry head and smiled compassionately.

"Rest in peace."

The demon lion expressed through its sparkling eyes, the utmost gratitude. His appearance began to dissolve through glittering particles. Those glittering particles mounted horizontally and when it reached a certain height it disappeared utterly. I watched gently as it disappeared. I realized the troubled heart of a demon. Since the very beginning, although they conceal it, they seek for love and acceptance and since they were created by the hatred of man, they wander aimlessly looking for the purpose of their life. Naruto is an example, a person who no matter what misery he goes through, perseveres and looks at the bright side of life. Such an admirable person can easily make friends and that is how Gaara changed. I'm hoping to become like Naruto and pass on a message through my experience to other people, to help them and care for them. I looked at the never ending ceiling of the white space, I smiled to myself.

"I'm coming back Kakashi, just wait for me."

I closed my eyes and concentrated myself.


	29. Chapter 28

**HIYAAAAAAAAA EVERYBODY!!!!!!! DID Y'ALL READ THE NEWEST NARUTO SHIPPUDEN CHAPTER?!? I can't believe it - I will not believe it.... KAKASHI'S DEAD!!!!!! HE MEETS UP WITH HIS PAPY AT THE "OTHERSIDE" (he's ugly :P) **

**Everybody a moment of silence for our fallen friend/lover/boyfriend/idol (insert here: any term you like) Kakashi..... "sniff"  
**

**... Okay! On with the show, here's goes the new chapie^^

* * *

**

**CHAPTER TWENTY EIGHT**

- So close…Yet distant -

Gradually my senses were coming back. I could hear the rain drizzling, tapping against surfaces, the breeze of the wind blowing and the light rumbling of the clouds. Then I tasted the ugly metallic taste of blood in my mouth, combined with the taste of rain. Next I felt the light drops of rain splashing against my face and my wet body with the unpleasant feeling of my clothes sticking to my skin. I was horribly aware of the pain in my body; I seemed to be severely injured. My body felt frosty underneath the rain and suddenly although I was sure this feeling was there since the beginning - I felt some pressure around my head, stomach, back, legs and some pointy and annoying pressure on my shoulder. From the pressures spread this comfortable and soothing warmth that caused my body to ignore the cold and the pain of my injuries. It gave me the feeling of security and comfort. I felt this wet and tickling, dog-like hair covering part of my face. For some reason I wanted to stay like this without waking, because I feared this might end and my chance to tell Kakashi will be impossible. Finally I could smell the rain, the burned wood, the debris, the blood, but most importantly the scent of a human and its hair. I knew it was a man. Lastly my heavy eyes opened, my sight was blurry and my left eye was covered by something. As my sight began to clear up, the grey murky sky was visible and I had to blink for the drops of rain drizzled down my face. At last my sight was crystal clear and instantly I knew who was holding me.

I sat on his crossed legs, while he held me close to him like I was something fragile and precious. His face was buried in my left shoulder, where I had felt his chin poking me annoyingly. One arm was laced around my shoulder blades so that his hand had a good grip on my right shoulder and the other was laced over my stomach and around my waist. Judging by his position he seemed to have frozen to a statue, remaining immobile for maybe quite some time. I smiled to myself, how pleasant it felt and wished this moment could last forever. Nevertheless I knew it couldn't and I decided to speak.

"I'm not dead yet, you know." I croaked weakly, horrified how dry and weak I sounded.

Kakashi's figure twitched and he pulled promptly back, staring at me with disbelief as if he was hallucinating.

"Such a thing shouldn't kill me; I thought you knew that - I'm dead-proof." I said with dry humour and chuckled.

Kakashi couldn't respond but stare at me with wide-eyes; the discovery that I was still alive in his arms was too much for him. For a split second I thought some tears were building in his eyes and he pulled me back into a tight suffocating hug. He showered my head with clothed kisses as if his life depended on it. His hug was like of a pincer's. My hands which were holding his shoulders tensed and tried pushing him.

"Ka…Kashi, you are squashing me and if you forgot I'm - badly wounded." I uttered with difficulty, suffocating in his hug.

His grip relaxed but he didn't pull away or said a word. I could breathe again, but I didn't dare to say a word, since Kakashi wasn't in the mood to say anything.

We sat there in complete silence, the rain poured down on us thickly and only the sound of the rain tapping against the debris was heard. I was a bit confused of his behaviour and told him I was fine.

"Kakashi, I'm fine you can let me go."

Kakashi didn't budge nor said a word. I contemplated over his behaviour and after observing some droplets rolling down his silvery hair, I realized something and the colour rose to my cheeks and my heart fluttered.

"Are you…Crying?" I asked him with a lowered and uncertain voice.

Kakashi rapidly pulled his head back with his face lowered so that his dripping silvery hair covered his expression. I raised my hand underneath his chin and raised his head so that I could see it. When I met his face, I stared with utter disbelief. I couldn't believe this, was that even possible?! Could that even happen in the book…Could he possibly be…Crying?!

His eyes, even his Sharingan eye was brimming with tears. His watery gaze looked at me, the despair and relief reflected in his sparkling dark orbs. Kakashi couldn't stop his tears no matter how much self-control he used, the thick tears cascaded without control down his eyes and were instantly absorbed by his mask. His gaze sunk out of shame and unfamiliarity. I was frozen stiff with a disbelieved stare, how could he possibly cry for me? Who would anyway? All of a sudden Kakashi pulled me back in an overwhelming embrace and there I heard for the first time a complete foreign voice of his.

"Will you stop making me worry so much about you? I was sure that I would have gone insane if you were gone forever!" he croaked with a voice strangled by emotions.

My eyes widen and my heart made a start. I couldn't believe what I heard and for a moment I thought I was dreaming, because Kakashi would never shed a tear for such a thing and he would never appear so shaken. Why…?

"Why do I have to worry so much about you? And why am I overwhelmed with relief that I must shed tears in front of you? Why can't it stop?"

I listened to his shivering voice with a squeezing heart. How could a man who's been cold for 20 years of his life, cry all of a sudden for pitiful and worthless me? Am I that important to him? Overwhelmed by the urge to comfort Kakashi, I embraced him back very tightly and expressed with desperation.

"Please Kakashi, stop crying! I'm here, please don't be sad!"

While I caressed in comfort the back of his head, I felt Kakashi wiping away the tears with the back of his palm. I was moved by this moment and still couldn't believe that it ever happened. I wondered how I could make such a guy cry, although he was trained to suppress all these emotions. Then he pulled back, his eyes were clearer now, like the fog from his eyes evaporated and he looked down to me. His eyes were so intense with emotions that my heart leaped. His arms still held me firmly against him and the distance between our faces was relatively close. We looked at each for what seems like eternity.

While Kakashi looked at me so intensively, he seemed to think intently about something. Since I realized the closeness of our faces and the rush of my feelings, I approached his face very very slowly, somewhat hesitantly. I know it was quite bold and a crime against humanity that I acted first and not him – but my feelings were screaming and longing for him so strongly. I blushed, but gratefully it was dark and the cool rain cooled me down.

By drawing slowly closer to his face I kind of hoped he would kiss me first, but no, he only looked at me, frozen. I gradually closed my eyes as I drew nearer to his face. I was entirely convinced that I was going to kiss him, his short warm breaths brushing my lips. With my eyes closed, I could feel the presence of his face so close to mine. A voice in my head shouted "Go on kiss him! What are you waiting for?"

However before I could reach his lips, I was promptly interrupted by Kakashi's cough and his hand patting my head. I opened my eyes, shockingly aware of our closeness and since he looked at me with a warm facial expression, completely ignorant of my kissing attempt - I drew hastily back with my gaze averted in embarrassment.

"Good that you are back." He mentioned calmly, glad that indeed I was back.

While he spoke I didn't once look at him, my heart that was beating fast was now run through by a stake. Not only was I ashamed of my action, but shattered by the reality of the situation. It was what I feared… I was bluntly rejected. I felt like crying and getting angry at him, so as a response quite roughly I pushed myself out of his embrace. I staggered on my own wobbly legs and without looking at him, I stated with a curt tone:

"I'll go check on Akai and Ronen."

Judging by Kakashi's silence, I knew he was confused and surprised. I turned away from him and for the first time I witnessed the disaster and ruins of the Dojo. Obviously Kakashi dug me up from underneath some debris, since I was covered in filth and the whole area where I stood was covered with shattered wood, cement and other material. The whole Dojo was destroyed; it must be during this beam of electricity that struck me that the entire Dojo collapsed.

Then amongst the debris, I saw something sticking out, I moved over there with my legs heavy as lead. I still was badly wounded and if I wasn't mistaken my healing ability either did not work or vanished. I went over to the splintered wood and found the scroll. I kneeled down and observed it. The scroll gave off the scent of mildew; its once olive green cover was blotched with black burned stains, like it was burned at several places. The seals which were pasted over the opening were burned away. It looked absolutely harmless; I picked it up and stood up with my gaze fixed upon it. I unrolled and saw that in the centre in a shape of a circle were these inscriptions to show another seal. Since in the circle it was blank, the scroll was now empty and undeniably harmless. I rolled it back together and put it in my hip pouch.

"What are you doing with that thing?" asked Kakashi all of a sudden with an earnest, which was old typical Kakashi again.

"Won't Hokage sama be satisfied to see the proof that we have completed our mission?"

"But-

-I killed it by sacrificing my demon." I interrupted Kakashi sharply.

I realized how rough I sounded so I sighed hopelessly and turned around with my gaze sunk and hopped over the debris passed Kakashi. The raised platform, which held the Dojo, had collapsed to the ground and the main building was burned down. The embers still glowed and some wood burned underneath the rain. The smell of burned wood combined with other materials gave off a poignant and disgusting smell. Judging by the appearance of the main building - which was in ruins with the flames still dancing around - showed that I must've been knocked out for quite some time.

I decided to quicken my pace and with one bounce I landed in the courtyard, which was spared from the disaster. What I met there gave my heart a start. Not so far apart lay Ronen and Akai. I ran over to Akai, dropping to my knees and pulling him up.

"Akai, Akai!" I called and shook his body.

His body stirred and I felt his weak pulse, then he exhaled weakly.

"You made it…" he uttered weakly with a smile.

I looked at him, relief washed over me but anxiety remained, as I noticed his weak state.

I scanned his appearance, no wounds only on his shoulder, but nothing else.

"Akai, what happened, who did this to you?" I urged bubbling with extreme concern.

"Finally its destroyed…I'm forever grateful…Now I can rest in peace…"

"What?! What do you mean? Akai!!" I shook him and he smiled at me growing ever so weaker, though grateful at my success.

"I wanted you to destroy this scroll, because…It sacrificed so many people's lives and killed two people I dearly loved; now…I can finally join them…"

"No! Akai! What are you talking about? You can't die, not now!" I shouted anxiously shaking him, though I could feel he was slowly leaving.

I heard a movement behind me and spun around, Kakashi stood there looking gravely to me.

"Kakashi, he's dying! But there are no fatal wounds!"

Kakashi kneeled across of me, checking Akai. He checked the wound on his shoulder and his pulse and then he looked at me and shook his head. Horror caught me and shouted at Akai.

"Akai! Don't die! Don't give in!"

Akai raised his trembling hands and rested one my shoulder and the other on Kakashi's and he looked at us. A remarkable but weak smile crept over his face, but his eyes looked blindly at us.

"I'm sorry…I haven't told you…Actually, if you destroy the scroll than those who've absorbed its power…Will die with it..."

My heart stopped and I covered my mouth by shock and despair. Akai chuckled.

"If I had told you…You wouldn't have destroyed it and set us free…I'm forever grateful to…you and you."

"Akai! How could you? Then I wouldn't have…!" I exclaimed with frustration and my eyes began to throb.

"It's passed and it's done, nothing can be reversed…"

"But why! Why Akai…Why lie about it?"

Akai chuckled.

"Those cursed with this power, envy those who don't have the same destiny…Ronen and I are cursed with such a burden that no human would ever want to possess…the burden of being half a monster and eternally chained to its power…The Fuhei clan was bound to perish sooner or later, soon as it laid its hands on this scroll…"

I couldn't take this anymore; the tears sprang out of my eyes and cascaded down on Akai.

"You idiot! I am sure there would have been another way!...I've-I've, it's like I've driven a stake through your heart!" I exclaimed with frustration towards my actions.

I wanted to undo everything what was done to bring him back to life…After all if I hadn't destroyed the scroll, he wouldn't be dying! Akai rested his palm against my cheek and hushed me gently.

"You haven't, you simply delivered us from this pain, from this curse…Also you have delivered yourself from your demon, you have forgiven him and embraced him…You have done so much for us…I'm sure you have made Ronen the happiest man on earth…"

Even more tears streamed down my face.

"No, I've lied to him about everything…I've hurt him so much by pretending to be someone I wasn't, only to end up killing everybody!"

"…Sara…" another voice called weakly and my head spun to the source.

I saw Ronen's body stirring and I looked at Kakashi so that he could hold Akai for me.

I jumped up and ran over to Ronen, dropped on my knees and held him up. Blood flowed from his mouth, he coughed and smiled at me weakly and he placed his trembling hand against my cheek. He looked ever more handsome as before, his eyes sparkling with affection ignoring the fact that he was dying.

"Thank God, you are alive…I was so devastated when I believed that I killed you…I'm so relieved…" he uttered weakly, coughing up some blood and nearly choking on it.

I was so ashamed of myself, so angry at myself of what I did, I felt like ramming a kunai into me. I embraced Ronen tightly and cried strongly, overwhelmed by shame, anger and sorrow. I realized what monster I have become.

"I-I-I'm so sorry Ronen, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry!" I sobbed shakily against his shoulder.

Ronen's trembling and weak arms climbed up my back and he returned my embrace.

"Sara, you don't need to apologize…"

"Of course I do! I've-I've betrayed your trust, pretended to be you bride-to-be, even pretended to love you! I should apologize! I've caused you so much pain and I didn't-I didn't-"

My sobs interrupted my speech. I was so overwhelmed of my crime, lying to Ronen that I loved him and leading the entire clan to its death. I never felt so guilty, so filthy and ashamed of myself. I have become such a monster!

"Please…Sara, I know you did this to deliver us from this curse, I'm not angry at you…"

I pulled back and shouted at him.

"You are angry at me! For God's sake Ronen, I've wiped out the entire clan only to destroy the scroll, I am evil, I am a monster I deserve death!"

Ronen looked at me with sorrow and then it was his turn to raise his voice.

"I am not angry at you, if I would be than I wouldn't do this."

His hand that held my head pushed me closer so that he could capture my lips. I was too surprised to react and let it happen. He pulled back leaning his forehead against mine.

"How could I get angry at you a person that I so dearly love and cherish? …You aren't a monster, but an angel that illuminated my life and gave me a purpose to live … You accepted me as a normal person regardless of my demon powers, does that make you a monster?"

The tears just streamed down, this ball of emotion stuck in my throat, prevented me from speaking any more, only my overwhelming sobs expressed my sorrow and wish that none of this ever happened.

"To see you cry for me…Shows me that I did have some importance to you and it makes me happy…"

Finally, the ball that prevented me from speaking disappeared and a wave of strong emotions burst out of my mouth, I desperately wanted to ease his pain in regardless what way.

"I'm crying because you are important to me and …I did like you a lot!" I expressed with desperation and Ronen's eyes widened in disbelief.

Before he could say a word, with my eyes shut I crushed my lips on his with such urgency that it surprised him. I didn't care that Kakashi was watching I didn't care about anything anymore! I spoke the truth from my heart and tried urgently to ease his passing-over by all means. The taste of Ronen's blood sickened me but I wanted to comfort him the last time before he leaves. My tears mingled with the taste of his blood. He responded to my kiss by kissing me back with such urgency and intensity, expressing his ever last proof of his love towards me and I accepted it with the same longing.

"I…Love…You…Sara." He said desperately, speaking during our kissing.

He pulled back, panting heavily not only from the kiss but from his weakness in health. Tears were brimming in his eyes and he caressed my face.

"I'm sorry what I did to you, I understood your anger towards me when you fought me…I've been so selfish and cold…"

"No! You acted upon feelings...We're both to blame."

Ronen then hugged me so that he could whisper something to me.

"I wish I would have met you, not as Ronen or any Fuhei member, but as a normal person that could freely and eternally express love towards you…"

He pulled back, kissed my hand gently and held it against his cheek. He was weakening by the seconds, the strength in his hand to hold mine against his cheek was decreasing and the light in his eyes slowly fading.

"Promise me…You'll be happy with …."

Ronen's hand dropped to the ground with a heavy thud and the rest of him ceased moving ever again. I placed the body carefully on the ground. His wide eyes fixed to the murky grey clouds, now showering us with thunder and lightning. I drove my hand over his eyes and closed them; the last tear rolled down his cheek and was washed away by the rain. I draped his arms over his chest and placed a kiss on my fingers and drove it over his lips. I stood up and looked at the sorrowful clouds and closed my eyes. I hope that he was going to a place, where he will be well taken care of. I felt hollow and felt rest of the world had crumbled away underneath my feet, dropping me into the dark abyss. So much anguish lingered, squeezing my heart at the reality that I've lost two precious people. I opened my eyes and noticed Kakashi had placed Akai's body beside Ronen's. I was too absorbed by the misery and depression that I kept staring in the sky, letting the rain wash away my left over tears and misery and hoped that it could wash away the sins I've committed.

I don't know how long I stood there, how long I stared at the sky, how long I let the smothering reality sink in without shedding any more tears. I looked away from the sky, turned away and walked towards the gates of the ancient Fuhei clan.

"Where are you going?" asked Kakashi, his voice sounding solemn.

I stopped in my tracks and turned my head aside to utter behind me.

"I'm getting our things."

"Sara-

-No Kakashi! I'm sick and tiered of this place and this village! I want to leave!" I interrupted Kakashi harshly and coldly.

"But-

-Kakashi! Just report to the Mizukage that it's done and send a message to the Hokage that we'll be back in a week!" I shouted with frustration, now facing a solemn Kakashi.

All of a sudden he tried to embrace me, but I dodged his attempt like it was an attack from an enemy and retorted with teeming anger.

"Keep that shitty consoling for yourself, I'm sick and tiered of this bullshit!"

Kakashi froze out of shock of my words; his eyes stared widely at me. I huffed, furiously pushing my gold locks back and glaring at him.

"I won't keep up with this shit! How long are you planning to lie to me? HUH! The Mizukage wants the entire clan executed and oh-so-great Hokage says only steal the scroll? What a joke! BOTH wanted the death of the clan! My instincts tell me that all of this is only a set-up to check if I am loyal to Konoha or not and that is why you barely took part of the mission, RIGHT?!"

Kakashi's gaze averted, showing that I was right about the mission and that he lied to me about the purpose of the mission. I groaned angrily.

"I can't believe that I killed an entire clan to get the damn scroll! Kakashi I had to kill the innocent! And for whom did I do this? For the damn leaders of some damn shinobi village! You shinobis are full of lies and exploit any person that you come across with! I've changed my mind now over the whole shinobi thing. I WON'T BECOME ONE!"

I stormed towards him, driven by anger, humiliation and shame of this whole devastating situation. I pointed an accusing finger at him.

"It is thanks to your brainless, inhumane, bloodthirsty and greedy teachings and shinobi ideals that I've become a MONSTER! A killing machine that eliminates anything that cross its path! All of you live for the sole purpose to kill! Behind all this philosophy of "will of fire" and "win respect, dignity and pride" are only lies and means to recruit clueless people to transform them into living monsters."

I panted heavily through gritted teeth, keeping my eyes fixed on Kakashi. Then I outstretched my arms to make a point.

"Kakashi! Do I look like I've got the will of fire, won respect, dignity and pride…No! I've got nothing, I won nothing! I feel ashamed, humiliated, and filthy and lost my humanity! I've got blood on my hands! For what price?! I deserve to be in the depths of hell!" I shouted one last time, and then out of emotional shock and nausea I wobbled about before I keeled to the ground and Kakashi caught me.

The tears cascaded down my face relentlessly and I sobbed intensely against Kakashi's chest.

"I've k-k-k-killed innocent people and two of them were so precious to me. How am I supposed to forgive myself ever again?" I sobbed and hiccoughed.

Kakashi held me silently, his support against my wobbly legs was of great help but the comfort which I usually felt in his arms, did not take effect on me. Instead I felt like being embraced by ice and it made me shiver. I felt sick, filthy and depressed and wished this pain could end!

All of a sudden, my heart pound, cutting the oxygen passage and causing me to retch. I pushed myself away from Kakashi, staggering across to lean against something, while clutching my chest. I heard Kakashi's muffled voice, asking with alarm if I was okay, but I stared wide eyed in front of me. I gave a groan that was forced out of me like I was being beaten. The pain came from inside my body and it affected my heart so badly that at every beat it would constrict harshly, cutting off my supply of oxygen. It felt like somebody was trying to tear my heart from both sides. Another groan was forced out of me, causing me to keel over. The final strike send like an electro shock, paralyzing me and inflicting me excruciating pain, I yelled in such pain as I never felt before in my life. The voltage assembled itself in my stomach spinning like a ball of fire burning me inside. The pain was beyond imagination, beyond the limitation of excruciating pain and as a result I passed out.


	30. Chapter 29

**Here goes another chapie^^ Thankies to all reviews and favouring me as story and author^^ Y'all are a great support^^ .... This is getting really steamy -grins-  


* * *

**

**CHAPTER TWENTY NINE**

- The pain of the heart -

I felt like I was having a dreamless sleep. My mind was blank and not once did I wake up to the sounds and movements produced around me. It was strange; I seemed to be hovering between consciousness and sleep. The sounds didn't tell me much, some muffled and unrecognisable whispering; somebody's panting breaths and some muttering. Than to the movements was this annoying rhythmic vibrations, like some jumping and sudden impacts, which gave my body a scare and a shake. Whatever that was I wanted to kick it to make it stop. After some time all noise and movements ceased and I was bedded on something cosy and pleasant. I remember tossing and turning around. I could for a split second see somebody moving about and that I was lying on a tatami and then I slept deeply again.

The next time I heard some annoying movements again, I decided to wake up but before I could perform that action, I felt something which made me become perplexed. I felt some something soft, moist yet rough that was gently pressured against my lips. It took me a moment to realize what it actually was until I woke up with a start, covering my mouth with a red face. I scanned the room in which I was placed in and not a single person was around. I brushed my lips and blushed ever more, sinking my face into my knees. It seemed like I was kissed just a moment ago, the pressure was still there. Who could have kissed me? I raised my head pushed the covers down and realized I was wearing a Yukata. I observed my dull Yukata and then the memories flooded back to my mind. It was like receiving an ice cold shower and the disgust and nausea overcame me. I remember collapsing because of tremendous pain and when I sat up I twitched painfully.

My stomach was still throbbing with pain. Now I took in my appearance. I was covered in some bandages and beside my bed sat a tray with a cup of steaming tea. I took it carefully and blew its contents than sipped out of it. As I did that I observed the room I was staying in. The room gave a pale but roomy air. Everything seemed to be so bright. It resembled the room I've stayed in, in that inn when Kakashi and I were on the way to Kirigakure. The floor was made of some comfortable but soft material and I lay on a thick tatami. The cement walls were bleached white so were the built-in cupboards, which its doors consisted of this traditional white paper, resembling these sliding doors. The room was squared and further up front was the main door, where I recognized my shinobi sandals placed in this tiny space after the door. I noticed another door which obviously led to a bathroom. Then I heard the whirring of the wood, which rattled something and I turned around.

I stared agape at what I saw and got up brusquely, still disbelieved of what I saw. I bumped against the window and observed with disbelief at the white landscape and the swaying snow flakes. The sky was murky white. To make sure that it really was what I saw, I opened the window and stepped out onto the balcony. The contact of my feet against the cold snow, which pricked me with its coldness, told me it was snow. I looked up at the sky, watching this hoard of thick snow flakes looking like an insect invasion falling down to earth. I raised my hands catching the flakes which instantly melted as it made contact with my skin. I observed with gratefulness and warmth. I loved snow above everything and it always managed to comfort me in the worst moments. My mind flew back at home. I'm in the living room holding a cup of hot coco, wrapped up in covers and sitting in front of a blazing and dancing fire and observing from time to time as the snow flakes swayed to and fro, depositing itself on the snowy landscape. I took in a good breath of this cold air and was back on the balcony and realizing that my feet were screaming with pain from the piercing cold.

I jumped back into the room, closed the window and gasped at how painful my feet felt. I walked around my room to get my feet warm again, and then I went inside the bathroom and switched on the light. This bathroom was a bit crammed, it had a toilet and a sink but at the far end was this strange looking compartment. I walked in and grabbed the handle and slid it open and peered inside. Quite amazed and surprised, I saw a thin hallway and a bathtub along it. There were hooks built in so that the towels and clothes could be hung. I grinned to myself at seeing this perfection and realizing that I had the freedom to take a bath again. I turned the faucets on, checked for the appropriate temperature and poured in some rice and lotus essence. Then I went back out of the bathroom, rummaged through my bag to find some new set of clothes and underwear and deposit them in the bathroom. While the water was filling the bathtub, I closed the door of the bathroom, stripped bare and removed all bandages.

I realized that my healing abilities haven't been working as efficient as it used to. The cuts were halfway healed and the bruises were still visible making me look like I've endured a long torture. My face bore some bruises and cuts but not so bad in comparison to my body. However what attracted my immediate attention was this circular burn mark around my bellybutton. It was the size of a football, as if somebody had kicked the ball against my stomach. It was scalded and it looked horrible in comparison to my smooth pale skin. I rested my hand against my stomach and thought about it. This horribly sensation of burning when I collapsed, caused this bizarre injury. No thought came to me what it meant.

Getting sick from my injured appearance that reminded me of the past, I quickly stepped into the murky white bathtub that was richly perfumed with rice and lotus blossoms. I gasped painfully when the hot water made my wounds throb, especially around my stomach area. I lay back but realized how crammed it was, instead of lying back, I found myself halfway sitting and lying down. It was annoying. I put my head under water letting all the water wash the filth away, although I appeared clean and well taken care of. However to let yourself sit in hot water felt so pleasant. Feeling too tiered to be completely in water I turned around so that instead of lying down according to the rightful away, I decided to sit across letting the walls of the bathtub close on me. I sat there with my back turned to the entrance of the sliding compartment doors, crouched with my arms embracing my legs and my chin resting on my knees while staring at the wall, observing as the pearls of water rolled down.

How annoying this whole situation was…I just want to go home and forget that all of this ever happened, forget my feelings for Kakashi, forget the horror and forget everything about Konoha and being a shinobi… I am fed up of this world and can barely wait to go home, but the problem is how to get home? I don't have the slightest clue of how I came here and how to leave. I brushed my hand over my face and realized I was crying. The anxiety and longing for home was as great as never before, for once I felt home sick.

I was suddenly startled when I heard a movement in the bathroom and when the compartment door was wrenched open. I turned my head around to find Kakashi staring at me with concern and alertness, as if something bad had happened. Kakashi panted like he had run a marathon. His uncovered dark eye stared at me with concern. Then relief washed over him and he uttered.

"Good that you are okay, I thought…"

Right away I realized that I was in the bathtub naked and that Kakashi was looking at me. I turned my red head away abruptly and covered myself defensively. My heart leaped at the meaning of his sentence and the relief in his voice.

"Well you are stupid to think of such stuff, I've grazed death so many times and do you seriously think I would want to end my life after such experiences! Ts! You are too naïve." I commented disapprovingly.

Then the door compartment door slammed shut and I noticed Kakashi wasn't there. The fury against him was still present; I just wanted to be left alone. However before I could think about peace and enjoy the solitude, the compartment door was pulled open once more and in came Kakashi with a naked torso with his Prussian blue Jounin shirt in his hand and a cloth. I looked in horror and bewilderment that. More horror crept over me when he closed the compartment door behind him and stood just behind me.

"What the hell are you doing here?!" I demanded, with embarrassment evident in my behaviour and red cheeks.

I became shyly and horrifyingly aware how naked I was and having a man with a bare torso behind you, looming above me – did not comfort me the slightest instead it filled me with discomfort and wild ideas.

"I'll help you wash up."

"You'll WHAAT?!" I exclaimed with horror and stared at him.

"Yes, you heard me." He responded calmly.

"But-but-but-I am-you…" I flushed.

"I am aware of that, that's why I brought my shirt."

I looked at him with a raised brow as if he said something random.

"Oh, come on Sara, don't be so stubborn."

I blew a fuse and retorted.

"What do you mean by don't be stubborn? Of course I am stubborn in this particular situation! If you haven't noticed I am naked and you're not - I am a woman and you are a man!"

Kakashi sighed.

"Still I don't understand your complexity towards such a thing? I am simply proposing to help you wash up."

It felt like I was talking to a monkey. Why is that guy acting so casual about it like it was some daily thing and why is he pressuring me about it? Why is he so dense? Can't he see that it's too embarrassing for me or better said too intimate. I groaned with frustration.

"Can you stop acting like it would be something normal to do?! ... I mean, only couples do that…"

"Than pretend that it's so."

My heart gave a lurch! Ehhhh?! What did he just say?! I turned my head at him, giving a disbelieved stare. He looked at me solemnly, meaning what he said. This guy was actually serious. Realizing that my face was boiling, I turned away briskly.

"What are you talking about? Still I won't let you. How can I guarantee that you won't take advantage of me?"

"I won't!" he declared firmly.

My heart gave another lurch.

"I give you my word as a Jounin."

"But-

"Here take that, then you can cover yourself, I promise not to look."

He had thrown his shirt in the bathtub, which sunk to the bottom. I observed it, still I was hesitating.

"Regard this action as a compensation for all your hardship."

My heart hammered so strongly against my rib cage. Why was he trying so hard to do this for me? Why was he so desperate to make me feel better? Why risk doing such an action? I was confused about everything; I was hesitating about this. However there was a growing need to be comforted and a longing for Kakashi. Also the feeling of guilt pressured me to accept his offer, after all without Kakashi's teaching I wouldn't have survived this mission. I outstretched my arm and took Kakashi's floating shirt and plastered it over my chest.

"I won't forgive you if you take advantage of this situation."

"Rest assured, I won't touch places where you don't want."

Even if he sounded so calm and reassuring, I still was very nervous. He swayed his hand back and forth along the long part of the bathtub, indicating something.

"I want you to sit like you usually do in a bathtub."

I didn't move and looked at him with my eyes narrowed.

"Turn away."

Kakashi looked at me and frowned and complied. I turned the way he asked me to, then he turned around and kneeled down, he placed his hand underneath my head and put it up so that I sat. However as a reflex I covered my chest by embracing my legs.

"I'd have to ask you to kneel."

"What…?"

"I'm going to take care of your back first."

My heart was beating so fast at this ridiculously embarrassing situation.

"Kakashi, I can't! It's too embarrassing and awkward!" I exclaimed nervously and panic stricken.

Kakashi stopped dead in his actions.

"Sara, do you trust me?"

"Huh?!"

"Do you trust me?" he questioned me gravely, with a reinforced tone.

Since he stood behind me, I didn't have the courage to look back at him. I bit my lip, why did he have to ask such an unfair question. Doesn't he know that no matter how many times he disappoints me or hurts me, I still will love him?

"Yes…" I muttered.

"Can you trust me on this?"

I nodded.

"Rest assured the water is so murky, I won't be able to see anything."

It was true, I forgotten that the water had turned to an opaque milky colour. Some reassurance washed over me but still I was nervous.

"Can you kneel?"

I complied without a word and kneeled in the middle of the bathtub. I felt that he dipped the cloth into the water and wrung it, and then he rubbed in some soap so that it became foamy. I sat awaiting this treatment nervously. I clutched my shoulders, making sure that the wet shirt of Kakashi covered my chest well. Finally the cloth made contact with my back and I twitched involuntarily like I received a needle in my back.

"Relax, how can you enjoy it if you are tense." He said calmly although lightly amused of my rigidness.

I didn't answer back, simply because I was speechless and embarrassed. Kakashi started gently in circling motions to scrub my back. He started around my shoulders and neck than gently down to my shoulder blades than lower and lower down my back. I endured the whole thing by biting my lips with the muscles becoming tenser as he drove the cloth over my back. The problem was Kakashi worked so carefully and gently during this whole treatment that it felt more like a torment rather than a massage. Instead of relaxing I became rigid as a board. Kakashi stopped in his movement and said.

"You'll end up getting a cramp if you don't relax."

"Yea, easier said than done!" I retorted.

Then he hummed to think about a solution. All of a sudden he grabbed my waist and tickled me. I nearly leapt out of the bathtub and started laughing.

"Stop, Kakashi! Ha ha ha, that tickles!"

I was on the verge of dropping my cover and pulling Kakashi into the bathtub, where he stopped showing that he knew the limit.

"That's better." He stated with content and continued his scrubbing business.

It was true I felt more relaxed and more at ease to enjoy the free massage given by Kakashi. He wasn't so bad at all and I sighed with content.

"Enjoying it?"

"Yup."

He scrubbed my back for quite some time and we both stopped talking. Kakashi was putting a lot of effort in scrubbing my back well and making sure I was satisfied with it. Later he asked me for my arms.

"Can I scrub your arms?"

I didn't hesitate anymore and let him move further down beside me. Gently he took a hold of my arm from my wrist and begun scrubbing it with care. His eyes remained fixed on my arm and on his scrubbing. I watched him with interest. He treated me with such care and precision that I looked like a tool that is being manufactured by its maker. Is that possible to put such care into such an action? Was he used to doing such a thing? I flushed at the thought of it and Kakashi noticed it.

"Is my closeness disturbing you?"

"No, no, not at all! I'm just amazed how much care you put into this."

Kakashi gave a chuckle and continued scrubbing gently.

"I remember my mother used to scrub me like this, she wouldn't let me go not until she scrubbed every inch of my body."

I smiled warmly at the thought of it. The love exchanged between a mother and a child sure is beautiful. However something did trouble me.

"I hope you aren't going to use the same method as your mom did on you?"

Kakashi stopped in his movements and looked at me; this typical glint was in his eyes again.

"No…Unless you want me to."

I turned my head away with a huff, hiding my red face and calming my pounding heart beats.

"Dream on, hentai! Now continue scrubbing!" I barked.

Kakashi didn't chuckle but I could tell that he was grinning behind his mask. He continued scrubbing. His right hand held the cloth and scrubbed while the other held my arm by the wrist. It was pretty annoying when Kakashi came up with these perverted jokes and it would always have a bad effect on me. It was difficult to control my raging hearts beats and the worst thing was every single nerve was focus on my wrist where he held me. His grip was firm then it relaxed, gliding along my hands gently as if stroking it. I kept my head turned away, biting my lips and hoping that I wasn't going to die from a heart attack. Then he interrupted the awkward silence by telling me to pass him my other arm.

"I'll scrub your other arm, you have to turn around."

I hesitated for a moment, worried to show my red face to him, but then I turned around my whole body so that he could have my other arm. He met my red face with surprise.

"Boah, such a red face, wait I'll get you something."

He walked out to get something, I breathed in relief. I took advantage of this liberty to stretch myself and soon as he came back I was kneeling as usual. My face was less red now. He slapped an icy wet cloth on my head and I exclaimed.

"Gosh! Don't do that! It's cold!"

"I think if I hadn't noticed your discomfort and red face, you would have fainted in the bathtub."

The thought that I would faint in the bathtub and that Kakashi would be here, alone, made me blush even more.

"Don't worry I wouldn't take advantage of you if you faint." He teased and I glanced at him then averted my gaze, how could he read my thoughts?!

"Ohhh, Sara I never thought you would think of such smutty things." Added Kakashi slyly and I snapped back at him.

"With you anything is possible. Who wouldn't think about the worst when being unconscious with a person like you?!"

Kakashi chuckled and reminded me once again of his preference.

"Don't worry I don't take advantage of unconscious women, especially if she doesn't appeal me and anyway where is the fun when she unconscious?"

Once again he had to be direct, but why in the hell do I get heart beats for his predictable smutty comments? He dipped the cloth in the water, rubbed some soap into it and started scrubbing my arm again. However this time he was less focused on his job since he glanced from time to time onto something that caught his attention. I noticed his eyes looking at me and turned red. Why in the hell did he have to look at me? Didn't he promise that he wouldn't look at me?

"Hey, hey! What are you looking at? Didn't you promise that you wouldn't look!" I protested and gave him a scowl.

He looked at me giving a simple statement.

"I noticed you had several rashes on your neck."

"Several rashes?" I repeated with confusion.

He put the cloth aside and pointed at the spot, I know that it was somewhere on my neck, but his pointing did not help. Since he noticed my confused behaviour, he stretched his hand and touched with his thumb against the spot he was indicating to. He touched below my right earlobe than drove down indicating where he saw them.

"Isn't there a mirror or something?" I asked him.

"Yea, above the faucet." he replied calmly and paused.

He raised his eye brow with mischief and again there was this glint in his eyes.

I looked at him with my eyes narrowed and retorted.

"Do you seriously think I would waltz over there to check?! Sorry I won't give you that pleasure!"

Kakashi chuckled at my annoyed behaviour and continued his scrubbing job. Since I couldn't get a mirror and thought it surely came from the injury at the Fuhei residence, I wanted to ask him for his opinion about it.

"Kakashi?"

"Hmm?"

"From your point of view where do you think these rashes came from, since I've got no mirror in front of me to tell?"

Kakashi slowed down his scrubbing, but kept his eyes on the cloth and then put some doubt into my question.

"You want me to tell you?"

I nodded, looking at him hopeful.

"From my professional point of view it was mostly likely caused by someone." He judged without once looking at me and I showed my astonishment.

"Really?"

"Yup."

"Is it from the fight?"

Kakashi scrubbed quicker and slowly finished off his task on my arm.

"Most likely – can you move back to the same position you were before, I want to get your back better done." he switched the topic quickly and I thought it was quite strange.

I complied to his instructions and found myself again with my back facing him. He stood behind me and was again scrubbing my back.

"So?" I mentioned, trying to get him back on the conversation.

"What?"

"My question?"

"Ohh right, well surely not caused in battle but most likely caused in an unfortunate situation."

Eh? Why is he being so indirect like avoiding the topic? Isn't he the type of person, when he has something on his mind he spits it out regardless of the consequences? I shrugged at his awkward response and demanded for a better answer.

"Kakashi, you are avoiding my question, now what caused it?"

"You want me to show you?" he sounded a bit astonished and on the other hand awkward.

The question was anyway strange, but I insisted.

"Yea, maybe an example or something."

Instantly I was aware of what I said and realized how naïve and brainless it was, until the next action followed. Kakashi stopped scrubbing. The cloth plopped into the water and unexpectedly he embraced me from behind. His arms wrapped around my shoulders which covered my arms that covered my chest with his shirt. I froze instantly at the contact of his arms around my bare skin and his bare chest touching the back of my shoulders. My breath hitched.

"Kakashi!" I croaked feeling flushed and my voice sounding so small.

I felt Kakashi's face that was now bare as his chest, against my cheek. My heart hammered against my rib cage.

"The rashes are from the debris that fell on you." He mentioned calmly, though his voice was unfamiliarly gentle with a tint of bitterness.

I had to blush and turn my head away from him, biting my lips and shutting my eyes. Has he got any idea how he makes me feel? This electric surge coursing down my system and setting my body on fire. Is he aware that he's tormenting me, making it difficult to restrain my feelings and forgot them? Then his lips grazed my ear and he breathed.

"I can understand why Ronen couldn't resist you…"

His blistering breath in my ear, send a shiver down my body, squeezing my heart and restricting the oxygen passage so that I my breath hitched. His lips brushed over my neck, releasing his breath along it so that I shivered and sometimes flinched. He stopped and breathed:

"Sara…You are so cute…You make me want you."

My heart lurched once more and I couldn't believe what I heard. Was he serious? Unexpectedly he began kissing my neck. The breath was knocked out of my system and I froze, but he held me and continued.

"Kakashi, what are you doing? You promised!" I whispered with shuddering breaths, trying to resist the dazzling effect it did on my body.

He ignored my protest and continued kissing me so skilfully. His lips were so soft and pleasant. Although my body was screaming for more, I couldn't let this happen. My mind was in chaos with what happened. I felt burdened and pressured by his kisses that for the first time I couldn't enjoy it, the panic rose. When he his lips moved away from my neck to my shoulders, I protested even more:

"Please Kakashi, stop it! Not when I feel like this!"

Kakashi's lips froze in his movements and he spoke again, bitterness evident in his speech:

"Is it related to Steve?"

I shook my head and there was a brief pause. His voice sounded even bitter when he pronounced the next sentence:

"Is it related to Ronen?"

I nodded, but only nodded that it was connected to the mission as well, but of course he couldn't make that out and asked a direct question, which made my heart jump.

"Did you love him?"

I felt frustrated of his question and exclaimed with tears shooting to my eyes.

"Who cares if I maybe did? How dare you do this when I'm in such a state of confusion, anger and sorrow? Can't you see that I don't want any of this, can't you see how miserable I am? Do you think any of this will cheer me up, make me forget about everything? You aren't making me feel any better, but only worse! You are burdening me, putting so much pressure on me!"

Kakashi pulled entirely away and stood behind and I heard him repeat weakly, as if truly shaken by my words:

"Burdening you?"

Frustrated by everything, I exclaimed strongly.

"Yes! Now go! Leave me alone!" I broke down in incontrollable sobs.

This was too much for me. Why does everybody have to torment me? Can't I be left alone for one moment, to find myself again and get back my strength? I didn't hear any movements behind me. For once he didn't find the words of comfort for me and he retreated, walking heavily out of the bathroom and the door slammed shut. I cried even more, I've hurt him as well and was miserably aware of it. I removed the Jounin shirt and slammed it against my face to cry in it. I never was in such a misery, my head ached from all the confusion and my heart ached from all the intense emotions felt and my body trembled from my overwhelming sobs. I just wanted to go home and forget that everything ever happened.

I finished bathing and stood in front of the mirror observing one area on my body. On my neck apart from the rashes from my injuries, were tiny red marks of Kakashi's kisses and another one on my shoulder as well, but one remained visible and it was in part covered by my hair. I drove my fingers over it and for a split second I was witnessing the same thing again. Truthfully I longed being close to him, but not now, not after all the pain I went through, the loss of two friends, pretences and my savage killing instincts. Can't Kakashi understand this, is he really that insensitive?

I left the bathroom and expectedly he wasn't around, of course who wouldn't avoid me after I said such things? Feeling so worn out, I pulled out the folded tatami, which I believe Kakashi folded so neatly – and sunk into it and covered myself up. I just wanted to sleep even if it was the late afternoon, but after crying so much I just wanted to rest my mind and body. Successfully and in a short time, I peacefully and dreamlessly fell asleep.

* * *

**- Fountain of bleeding nose - That was my fav chapie, but there is always more to come -grins-**


	31. Chapter 30

**Heya, I got bored to DEATH and so I decided to post this chapter and by the way.... I LOVE THIS CHAPTER -big grins- :p  


* * *

**

**CHAPTER THIRTY**

- The problem before the journey -

I realized I had been knocked out for two whole days. The words came unfortunately not from Kakashi but from the owner of the inn. This middle aged woman greeted me one day when I came down to get something to eat and drink and she lively chatted with me.

"Oh! So you are better now? That's a relief."

Feeling quite awkward that she was asking for my health, I put some doubts into her inquiry.

"What do you mean?"

The owner looked at me, studying my confused attitude and she gave a cry of realisation.

"Hasn't he told you, your boyfriend?"

"My boyfriend?"

"You know the good-looking guy with the silver hair."

"Oh him, he's not my boyfriend and he didn't tell me anything."

"Oh, really?" The lady was surprised; apparently she got the impression about us and the thought that Kakashi was my boyfriend felt a bit awkward.

Then the lady rested her finger against her chin, as if remembering something.

"Four days ago when he came in with you in his arms while you were unconscious, holding you so close to him and asking for some medical attention and a room – I could have sworn he was your boyfriend. I mean the way he was concerned about you was that of a lover and seeing you share a room I couldn't think otherwise. Also for the passed two days I visited your room to take care of you, I always found him nearby sitting beside your bed and willing to help me take care of you."

I turned red and my heart hammered, what nonsense is that old lady talking about? Like Kakashi would ever invest so much care in me?! And feelings, ha! I just bluntly ignored her assumption and told her straight in the face.

"I'm his pupil and he's my teacher."

The lady looked at me, feeling bad of what she said and instantly apologized.

"Oh my! Let me apologize for my rudeness!"

I waved it off her apology with a smile.

"Its okay, many people assume we are anyway..."

I averted my gaze thinking about how Kakashi and I have treated each in the passed 2 days.

It was like a thick wall grown between us, separating us more and more. Although we shared the same room, he was mostly out and returned always very late while I'm sleeping.

"Don't give up." Told the lady all of a sudden in a warm manner.

"What?" I arched a brow in confusion.

The lady came closer to me.

"Isn't love beautiful?"

I shied back with my head completely red. The lady chuckled with delight.

"I've also experienced the beauty of love in my youth."

"But he's a teacher and I am a student!" I said quite appalled

"That makes it even more interesting! I can see it in front of me, a forbidden love between teacher and student, how scandalous and romantic!" marvelled the lady with her eyes sparkling with admiration.

Then she cupped her cheeks and blushed.

"Oh, how I wish to be in the same situation like you!"

She came back to me and whispered with determination.

"No matter how hard it is, or cold he is, never give up, persevere. Tell him your feelings before its too late, we don't know; maybe he's been waiting for them? Life is short deary; make the most out of it."

I stared at her blankly, what is she talking about? The lady could read my thoughts and said.

"I don't believe you want that it becomes an unrequited love. Choose the right moment to tell him, don't keep it for yourself because it'll hurt you and fill you with regret. You must forgive and forget and start anew."

Then the lady turned away and retreated into her office. She left me standing there. I stared at the place she disappeared to. I refused to listen to what she said although she was completely right. I knew all of this was never going to happen. I rather die of a heart attack than being heart broken twice. With a groan I stormed to the dinning room and ate my dinner by myself.

* * *

I returned to my room, got undressed into my Yukata and simply went to bed. I received a horrible head ache from all the confusion and frustration that I easily fell asleep and thought about nothing else. However I wasn't as deeply sleeping as expected.

Several hours later I heard the door being carelessly shut and somebody staggering clumsily through the room. I know it was Kakashi only that this time he seemed a bit drunk since he was staggering and stumbling over everything. I decided to ignore him for good and tossed over with my back facing his direction. There were no more movements heard, it's like my sudden movement shocked him. Then I heard him changing himself, it was like my hearing sense became extremely sharp, it listened to every of his movements and it pulsed through my system to be close to Kakashi again. His clothes rubbed softly against his body and dropped silently to the floor. I bit my lip and let the covers cover my ears. The noise ceased. It seemed like Kakashi disappeared entirely from the room.

However I felt something slip underneath my covers and became shockingly aware of Kakashi's presence in my bed. I wanted to shriek and jump out of bed and yet I was paralyzed and drawn by the idea that he was in my bed. Instantly I decided to pretend I was sleeping and shut my eyes, nonetheless every nerve in my entire body was sharply aware of Kakashi's nearness.

All of a sudden he pinched a streak of my hair and stroked it with his thumb. I bit my lip to contain myself from gasping or twitching. What the hell was that guy doing?! First of all who allowed him to sneak into my bed and secondly to touch my hair?! A shrill shook my nerves entirely when he moved a bit closer to me. I blushed profusely. I could feel his warmth and once more I had to bit my lip to contain myself. He fingered the streak of my hair gently and gave my heart another thorough shake when he sniffed my streak of hair. This guy was just so... impossible! What's this all about? Was that a sort of revenge from the stuff I said to him? Kakashi finally released my hair and I could feel more relaxed although my body was remained rigid from his close presence.

I waited and waited. I hoped that this guy would fall asleep and that I could finally get my share of sleep…

No movement was made, Kakashi remained motionless. Feeling reassured and relieved, I turned over pretending that I was still sleeping, I opened my eyes. The room was very dark, but I could tell Kakashi's outlines clearly and as my gaze climbed up the so-called sleeping Kakashi, I was unexpectedly met by his terribly piercing eyes. Before I could think of running away, I was surprised by Kakashi's sudden kiss which stunned me. He pulled back and looked at me, there was something wrong about him, his eyes were dense from something and he lacked his usual calm and focused attitude. Only when he spoke out six words I knew he was drunk.

"I can't get enough of you." He breathed with his face approaching mine.

My heart lurched and I repeated with disbelief:

"What?!"

Kakashi didn't respond and was more focused on getting close to me again. I moved back and back until my back touched the wall. Not once did Kakashi's eyes leave mine, he moved underneath the covers to get closer to me and when he was close enough he stopped. Now it was my chance to bring him back to his reasons.

"Kakashi quit it! You won already, now stop taking out your revenge on me, because I got angry at you." I told him firmly.

Instead of saying anything he caressed my neck, I shied back but he got a hold of me and his face hovered over my neck.

"You still have the hickey."

His hand drove over my skin and I shuddered. He smirked against my neck.

"You're equally anxious as I am."

My heart lurched once more, what was he saying? What disturbed me the most was that he said "equally", which means he also knew how I felt at his closeness… Before I could contradict Kakashi, he raised his lips to my ears and breathed.

"I'll make you mine tonight."

This was too much for my heart to take or for myself, I was ready to kick him away from me, but unfortunately he had taken over my lips once more but this time dominantly.

In no time I was under him, trapped between his body and arms. He overwhelmed me with such domineering kisses that I found it difficult to struggle or to resist against him… After all wasn't it what I wanted?

For a moment I gave in, but suddenly struggled against him after realizing the situation. Kakashi was drunk! The taste of alcohol was so poignant that it made me sick. I know that Kakashi would be shocked when he finds out the next morning what we did and either for my sake it wasn't good for me to get any closer to him! However then why is he even while drunk wanting to sleep with me? Why is he kissing me? Does he really feel for me? Does he maybe love me?

However a memory flashed by which showed Kakashi's rejection while I tried to kiss him and instantly I pulled away and told Kakashi:

"Stop it! Kakashi you are drunk, you don't know what you are saying or doing!"

"I do know what I am doing and I am not drunk!" he scolded me although his breath reeked like alcohol.

"Kakashi, stop it right now! Tomorrow you'll regret what you did!"

"No, I won't!" his voice now firm and I looked at him surprised that he was so serious about this.

The alcohol clouded his eyes and his face was flushed, his arms trembled having difficulty to support his body's weight any longer.

"I'm serious. I want you so badly, if you don't believe me than look at us!"

I looked at "us" but I still didn't want to grasp the truth of this. He was drunk for goodness sake! By tomorrow it'll be long forgotten and who knows maybe this guy is the type of person when drunk that sleeps with any women! The very thought made me sick.

"After being with you, observing you and being close to you, I cannot hold back any longer! I want you more than anything else! Please, let me make love to you!"

I blushed and my heart jumped out of my chest. This whole situation scared me, it was too much for me to bear and most importantly I felt like lies were thrown into my face especially because he was drunk.

"Don't you want it too?" he asked me his voice had become gentle and concerned and my heart made another lurch.

I turned my head away covering with the back of my palm my reddening face. Why was I hesitating? I know I relied more on Kakashi's sober state than drunken one, because I was convinced that Kakashi while drunk does the most reckless things in the world and doesn't remember about it the next morning. Then on the other hand my feelings were so impulsive that it made me difficult to decide. With my head turned away, I muttered:

"I prefer doing it with the sober Kakashi."

I could feel that Kakashi froze in disbelief at my statement, even my heart was giving me a hard time in this situation.

All of a sudden his entire body collapsed on top of mine causing me to give a shriek of fright. My whole body became rigid and I started nudging on Kakashi and ordering him to get off of me:

"Kakashi, what are you doing? Get off of me!"

Kakashi's body was motionless and when I heard his calm breaths, I realized he fell asleep on top of me. I was too startled to react immediately, his face touched the tatami passed my head and his body covered mine completely. I lay there equally motionless and staring at the dark ceiling. I could sharply feel his warm body against mine, everywhere it touched and I felt his calm heart beats against my chest. It gave my heart a skip and dispersed a tingling sensation along my body. I was boiling with so much feeling that it made me hungrier to be closer to him. With the blush creeping over my cheeks and my heart hammering I laced my arms around his back and held him firmly against me. I took in his manly scent that sent another shrill down my body and caressed his bare back.

His back was so smooth yet rough in some areas from the scars, it sent another thrill down my spine. O how much I longed to be close to him and how much I wish this distance could be closed forever! However reality showered me with the truth that this couldn't happen no matter what. Kakashi is an Anime and I was a human and I have a feeling that I'll be returning home very soon. The greater the distance is between me and him, the better I'll cope with when I part from this world and from Kakashi forever.

I pushed Kakashi off of me and he lay now on his back sunken in such a deep sleep that he appeared dead to the world. I sat up and straightened my Yukata and sighed hopelessly to the event that happened. Inevitably my eyes were back on the sleeping figure of Kakashi. My body was overreacting only by staring at that idiot, all the stuff that that idiot said disturbed me very much.

"Kakashi…Can you tell me why you make me feel like this? Like whenever I am close to you or see you my heart is ready to give out?" I muttered.

Gradually I slid down beside Kakashi still observing him and talking to him like he was there listening to me without a word.

"Why do you have to make me crazy for you? Why do I have such a powerful feeling towards you which I never ever experienced with anybody in my life? Why does this feeling squeeze my heart so mercilessly?" I whispered and my voice trembled with emotions and tears trickled down my cheeks.

"Why is that I feel that you have been the only man I ever truly loved in my life?"

"Why can't you see that your friendly presence torments me and can impossibly cut away my feelings for you? Stop being friendly to me, please hate me! Hate me so that I won't feel the pain when I leave you and Konoha! Damn, stop coming to me and being close to me, can't you see that it hurts me? Stay away from me it's for your own good!" I whispered tearfully and lay beside him, observing his sleeping face.

My feelings were rushing through me like a wild fire so ready to burst. I took a hold of his hand and kissed it gently, my hands trembled and I broke out in quiet sobs.

"Why do you have to tempt me against my will? It is me you should be careful of!"

I released his hand and cupped his face and pressed my lips against his. I kissed him so feverishly although he was deeply asleep, I had to release my smothering feelings towards him and even if it meant that he wakes up and finds out. I was so desperate! I placed countless kisses on his face and now I came to his neck. I stopped dead and remembered where he gave me my hickey. I boiled to do the same thing to him, I want to mark him, show him that he belongs to me. My hands run freely around his torso, exploring the softness and roughness and the scars. My body was on fire for him and with a brusque push I shoved myself away from him to draw a line to my actions and got out of bed.

I felt absolutely lousy the next morning. Even though I slept on Kakashi's tatami -which I had to lay out myself in the darkness of the night – I still couldn't sleep. The entire tatami smelled like him! His scent plagued me the whole night through reminding me every freaking second what he said and what I did to him! It frustrated me so much that I gave up the whole sleeping business and got up before dawn. A cold shower woke me up instantly and as I came out of the shower, fully dressed and ready for the day my eyes scanned Kakashi's sleeping figure and then the memory from last night gave me again an unpleasant shower and I turned away.

This whole thing was a terrible incident, okay Sara! He was drunk and what you did has of no importance! Just be oblivious and ignorant, act like normal and don't you dare show some discomfort or blush! I took a determined air, I glanced at Kakashi and then at the table nearby, an idea came to me. I dried my hair with the towel, hung it aside and left the room quietly. Minutes later I came in with a tray, filled with dishes of fish, vegetable, meat and rice and also a pot of tea. I placed it gently on the table and adjusted the food and dishes fit for Kakashi and me to eat. It smelled nice and my stomach made a hard time to hold back a growl. Staying up the whole night was torture! And who is to blame…HIM! I glared at Kakashi and there I saw his body stirring and a sleepy moan erupted from him.

"What's that nice smell?"

I didn't answer and instead crossed my arms over my chest and sat with my legs crossed, giving an indifferent impression. He tossed and turned and stretched himself. I had to stifle a laugh; this guy looked like a tiered dog stretching himself. Finally he sat up and his head turned to me, instantly he clutched his head and groaned.

"Au, my head!"

"That would be the hang over." I replied curtly and he turned his head to me and noticed with surprise the breakfast table.

"What hang over?" he asked, pushing the covers away and crawling to the table to sit in front of it.

This guy couldn't even remember that he got drunk, what an idiot! I took my chop sticks and picked the food I wanted and placed it into my plate and talked to him without looking at him.

"Last night you returned totally drunk and you made a hell of a racket, stumbling over yourself and over everything that came in your way."

"It sounds like somebody hasn't slept well."

I stopped in my movements and eyed Kakashi sharply and pointed at his face with my chop sticks.

"It's thanks to you that I couldn't sleep at night, Baka!"

Kakashi shrugged his brows in confusion and I noticed it and with contempt I told him the reason.

"Well if you haven't noticed you were sleeping in my bed."

Kakashi turned his head back to the place he slept and slipped out a "oh". I rolled my eyes in annoyance; this guy was so slow to realize things.

"I had to sleep in your bed which was uncomfortable and stinking like hell!"

"I don't smell bad."

"Well you don't know." I muttered with my arms crossed and my head turned away from him.

There was a pause between us and then Kakashi began taking some food for his rice.

"What actually happened? I'm not entirely convinced of your statement, it sounds more like an excuse."

My heart jumped. For a split second I thought he knew what happened, but I remembered how drunk he was and the taste of alcohol was still in my mouth. I was easily irritated from my lack of sleep and from this whole situation that I slammed my chopsticks on the table to give Kakashi a shake. I decided to tell him the half truth and let's see how he's going to bear this.

"Okay you wanna hear the full story! I'll give it to you!" I declared with a sharp voice and explained what happened. "Obviously while you were drunk you were too lazy and too tiered to get your own tatami out, so you decided to sneak into mine. The problem was I was wide awake because of the entire racket you made. All of a sudden you needed to check if I was sleeping by touching my hair! I lay there waiting till you fell asleep and then when I wanted to check if you actually were, you assaulted me! Either you got me mixed up with somebody else or you are simply one great pervert after you are drunk! Fortunately you didn't come any further since you collapsed out of exhaustion, finally I could escape you and that meant sleeping in your tatami! Can you understand now why I couldn't sleep the whole damn night?!"

I huffed with fury while glaring at him with contempt:

"Consider yourself lucky that I've got enormous patience, otherwise you would have been dead already!"

Kakashi stared at me with disbelief with the food hanging from his chop stick which hovered close to his mouth. Then he in a hasty manner he stuffed the food in his mouth and took a gulp from his tea. His gaze was lowered some tension and bitterness was obvious in his behaviour.

"What did I do to you…last night?" he asked with difficulty with his gaze still fixed on his tea cup.

My heart gave a squeeze and I retorted.

"I thought you would…" the words were stuck in my throat and I averted my gaze with my face boiling red.

How could I even talk to Kakashi about this, say that if he hadn't collapsed we would have gone further?

"You only were kissing me, if you hadn't collapsed than, well…"

I prefer telling him partially the truth than keeping this all for me. He's got to cope with this and after all I want to be able to sleep in security without feeling that he may assault me over night. He's got to be aware of how uncomfortable I felt.

"Did I…Say anything?" although his voice was unusually quiet and uneasy I could understand what he meant and I shook my head.

"No." I lied and with Kakashi's words echoing in my head _"I cannot hold back any longer! I want you more than anything else! Please, let me make love to you!"_

Those words that came out of the drunken Kakashi sounded so real and sincere like he was conscious. It gave me a chill down my spine at the thought that it could be real. I glanced at Kakashi he was very troubled about this incident and noticed me glancing at him. His eyes reflected his uneasiness.

"I'm sorry if I scared you like this, I promise that it will never happen again. Please, let's forget that this incident ever happened."

I averted my gaze and nodded. I doubt I could forget it; all the so-called "incidents" that happened between us were engraved in my heart. Then Kakashi gave a sigh and uttered with uneasiness.

"I'm sure you don't trust me anymore, after this happened."

My feelings screamed "Of course I do no matter what happens!", but instead I expressed in a neutral manner:

"Maybe."

After a brief pause, I gave a suggestion about our plans for the return to Konoha.

"We cannot linger here any longer, we may attract some unwanted attention and who knows maybe there are some agents from the Fuhei clan that are after us."

Kakashi was stuffing himself with food but was paying attention without looking at me.

"I believe you are right, after breakfast we can get ready and leave." He agreed and I nodded.

We ate in silence, each in our own thoughts and not daring to look at each other. I believe Kakashi was equally embarrassed and uneasy about what happened. It was a wise move to tell him of this, although it most likely will make the distance greater between one another. It should remain like this until we reach Konoha. The pain of separation will be less difficult to bear.

I stole a glance at Kakashi, he drove his hand through his silver hair and with horror I noticed something and dropped my tea on my lap.

"Ouch, damn! I'll c-c-clean it up!" I sputtered nervously, fumbling for the cup and for a cloth to dry me up.

Kakashi had come over and he held a cloth in his hand. He kneeled down in front of me and offered to clean up by dabbing the cloth over my soaked lap. I took a sharp breath intake and the blush crept over my face. Man! He's touching my laps, he's touching my laps! How else am I supposed to react?! My heart was pounding so hard and loudly that I was afraid he might hear it. My eyes fell on his neck and my face turned even redder and I averted my gaze. Damn! I gave him a hickey!? Why in the hell did I do that!? He'll right away know who gave it to him!

"Don't be nervous, I'm not going to do anything to you." He reassured me and I looked at him and he gave me a smile.

My eyes fell on his lips and I turned away, pushing his hand off of my laps and taking the cloth away from him.

"I can do it." I mumbled and rubbed my clothes dry.

"Are you sure that I didn't do more to you last night, since you are so nervous around me?" he verified.

If this guy continues I'll have to kiss him to death. His closeness is intoxicating!

"You kissed me and were on top of me okay! Now give me some space, before I get a heart attack!" I growled and jumped up, stormed to my bag took some clothes out and ran to the bathroom.

This guy was impossible! He just had to add more oil to the fire. Does he really think I'm going to describe every single detail and specifically how I felt? It's already too embarrassing what happened just before and what I said – can't he just leave me alone and give me some distance?


	32. Chapter 31

**Hiya^^ Another update and I love this chapie too - watch out, hot stuff is coming^^ Yipeeeeeeeeeee.**

**By the way, did ya guys check out the new naruto chapies? Kakashi is.... REALLY DEAD, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! That's why my story has "immortalized" him, sniff...

* * *

CHAPTER THIRTY ONE**

- The return journey only begins… -

By noon we left the inn and treaded through the deep snow down the hill. I realized that we were in high altitudes and apparently it was the winter season. Luckily I loved snow and had a good reputation to endure all sorts of miserable weather conditions.

A snow-covered pine tree forest ran down the hill and we treaded through the lifeless and tranquil forest. A gust of wind blew over the top of the trees, brushing off the snow and letting it fall gently down on us. I could smell the scent of sap and moist ground. The silence between Kakashi and I was evident and heavy. The so-called incident hovered over our heads like a nagging buzzing bee that never gets tiered of flying around our heads. As usual Kakashi led the way and I followed him without a word or a sound. Throughout our journey towards the Kiri country, the atmosphere has never been so tense and uneasy.

The mission changed our relationship drastically, in one way we drew closer but in the other way we were torn apart. Also my feelings have so strongly evolved that it became unbearable. Even now when I observe Kakashi's back, I feel easily attracted and tempted to unleash my feelings. I never realized how unstable I was and how he could manage to bring me to the boiling point. I could already predict that sooner or later my feelings will just pour out of me. Now I realized how perverted I've become and I slapped my cheeks to get rid of the nonsense I was thinking about.

"Are you okay behind there?" asked Kakashi all of a sudden, breaking the silence that separated us for two whole hours.

"Y-y-yea." I stammered and realized how ridiculously nervous I sounded.

Kakashi didn't seem to be bothered by my awkward response and paused in the conversation to contemplate over something. I decided to take over the conversation, since it felt ridiculous not to respond or at least talk to him.

"Did you…Did you actually carry me the whole way from the Kiri village up to here?"

"Yes I did."

"Was the distance big?"

"Several miles."

"Several miles?!" I repeated with disbelief.

"Yup, it was quite difficult to walk up the hill with all the snow, but I managed."

"How many days did it take you?"

"One day."

"One day?!"

"So you literally ran several miles in one day with an unconscious person on your back?!"

"Yea."

I couldn't help but gape at Kakashi. How could he do that? Was that even possible? … Did he do that out of concern towards me? My heart fluttered with pleasure at the thought.

"Thank you."

"It was not a big issue that was the least I could do after you destroyed the scroll-

-and the Fuhei clan." I finished the sentence with bitterness.

Silence fell upon us again and we treaded through more deep snow.

"When we reached the bottom of the hill we'll take a break."

I didn't show any objections and followed Kakashi. Kakashi took a deep breath and spoke again this time in a calm and bitter manner.

"Sara."

"…"

"I should apologize."

My eyes sharpened and I observed his back with surprise.

"I'm sorry that I haven't considered your feelings properly afterwards the mission. I'm sure you have noticed that I am very insensitive and ignorant towards your perspective of things and you have all the right to think like this. It's just I've lost the touch of sorrow, remorse and affection, so I apologize if from time to time I react coldly without reason."

I listened to him quietly with the surprise and disbelief growing in me. He was actually apologizing?!

"Now I understand what you meant by the fact that my actions burdened you." He said with understanding and with a touch of sensitivity towards this issue.

It appeared to me that Kakashi paid unnecessarily attention to my words I said about him. I never thought my words could affect him so much and already guilt gave me some unrest about it.

"As a teacher I failed to perceive your true impressions about various things. I've disregarded your background and ignorantly taught and treated you like an average shinobi in training. I should have paid closer attention and care towards your wellbeing rather than your improvement in your physical strength. I am sure that if I had a deeper understanding towards you, maybe the pain could have been avoided."

I stared at his back. I couldn't believe what he said. He felt bad because I was suffering? He was accusing himself for all my pain? But why? Why react so profound all of a sudden, where before he considered such a thing lightly? Why did he all of a sudden feel concerned about what I felt and about my well being? Am I that important to him? Kakashi confused me enormously, I couldn't find out what he was thinking. For one second I could perceive his thoughts and then a moment later it was unclear again, I simply did not know what to think about him anymore.

However the tone of his voice and his self-accusation urged me to console him and I had to restrain myself from hugging him. I walked a bit faster and walked beside him and grabbed his hand. Kakashi glanced with astonishment at me and at my hand. I kept my gaze fixed in front of me.

"What I said to you at that time was cold and untrue. What you did in the bathroom was out of good intentions and remorse. I don't regard you as a failure on the contrary; you successfully gained my trust and loyalty. I believe you are the only person in this world that came very close to me, or more precisely you are the only person I have accepted so far to get this close to me. So as a teacher you haven't failed, on the contrary you succeeded."

Now I looked at him and our eyes met, he was mostly stricken by my last sentence and I went on.

"Truthfully before I couldn't stand you. I regarded you as a person with terrible mood swings and a lazy attitude. However I grew to understand you better after staying with you. You are strict, serious and cold at times when it regards missions, difficult situation or an unfamiliar situation. This character strait - although it's annoying sometimes – shows your sense of duty and seriousness in critical and life and death situations. Your cheerful and amusing attitude expresses that you do feel warmth and see the bright side of life. It is after studying you better I grew to like you a lot." I expressed with sincerity.

Kakashi looked at me like I made a wedding proposal. What? I'm only being sincere here! I didn't say "I love you" stupid! Kakashi looked away a moment and sighed with relief.

"I thought you hated me after all the things I did to you since the very beginning. I'm aware that I haven't treated you well and it seemed right to me that you'd hate me more."

Then he cleared his throat, prepared to say something deep.

"I admit that I projected the same sentiments like you did for me in the very beginning. I thought of you as a rebellious, thick headed and disrespectful kid, ignorant of everything around her. You know, after living a selfish life it's a habit to disregard other people's opinion and treasure your own, but I grew to open myself to accept views, friends, which I was unfamiliar with. I could say by going through those sudden changes I grew to like you too."

He looked at me, his hand intertwined with my fingers holding mine firmly and smiled at me cheerfully. I replied with a smile at his cheerful face. We walked down the hill hand in hand through the forest.

This became a memorable moment inscribed deep within my heart. We went through so much and yet we managed to stay close. I realized that our relationship was something special and unique. It could also be that Kakashi did this in order to repent for his coldness and the whole mission, but I didn't care as long as I can bask in this beautiful moment, nothing else matters.

We reached the foot of the hill in the next hour and made a break. Although we couldn't sit to rest our legs because of the snow - we leaned against the trees ate and drank something. By that time we had let go of our hands. It was already embarrassing enough that I forget that we held hands, especially when he glanced at my face than at my hand. With my face burning up I released his hand and went to my own corner, I knew he was grinning ridiculously at me. It was like I was caught red-handed in an unpleasant matter.

We ate our lunch in silence and in our own corner although not far apart from each other. I leaned against one tree and he leaned against another, but we remained in our field of vision. As I ate there in my own corner I noticed Kakashi was observing me and wearing a remarkable expression on his face, as if observing with interest at a rare species. However soon as I would look at him, his eyes would be fixed on his food again or he would observe his surroundings. I eyed him with suspicion. This guy was seriously strange and confusing. What is he staring at? And why did he make such a face?

Feeling annoyed and awkward that he was secretly observing me, I walked around the tree and leaned against the tree with my back facing his direction. I sighed, can't he stop giving my heart such a shock? I know this game of observing people secretly, it's only fun when you don't get caught but if you do, then you get a heart attack! I rested my hand against my chest; gosh my heart was hammering like nuts! Shut up you excitable thing, give me a rest before you blow my cover! I leaned back with my head raised to the murky sky and closed my eyes, trying to calm myself down. There was this absolute silence followed by the tranquillity of the forest, the smooth chilly breeze and the distant sound of snow dropping from the tall trees. Everything felt so perfect when an annoying "thing" interrupted my meditation.

"I suggest that we get going before night fall."

That annoying voice was in front of me, I pushed myself away from the tree and ripped my eyes open, however my words of contempt instantly died away when I encountered him. Kakashi was suspended upside down from a bough with his head dangling above the snow covered earth and the worst of all we were face to face. I leaped back with a shriek and clung to the tree burying my red face against the tree.

"Stop sneaking upon me like this! Have you become too lazy to call me or walk over to me?!"

Kakashi chuckled with amusement.

"Not at all. I just wanted to demonstrate our efficient and quick method to travel through the Kiri forest."

What an idiot! Can't he use a normal method to announce things instead of always giving me a heart attack? I still clung to the tree believing that he was going to leave me alone, but instead he drew closer to me, walking towards me with his feet still glued underneath the bough.

"By the way," he mentioned with a teasing and provocative tone. "If you had bounced off harder against the tree, I'm sure our lips would have touched by now."

This guy really enjoys taking advantage of me when I'm embarrassed, what should I do?!?! Sara, don't let him get you, show him that you can fight, show him that you are immune to his teasing! I released the tree, grabbed my bag and swung it over my shoulder, which smacked Kakashi across his face which he retorted with an "au!" I walked a bit around the tree, to take some distance from Kakashi and to climb up the tree. Already I stood horizontally with my feet glued to the tree trunk. I put my rucksack on correctly and walked up the tree until I was on the same bough as Kakashi.

"Kakashi, I was aware of that you know. Even if our lips had met, I wouldn't have felt anything anyway because it would have been an accident."

Kakashi still hung down the bough and walked around it until he stood on top of it and in front of me. His face was a bit red from where my rucksack hit him. Then Kakashi in a proud air said:

"What do you mean "you wouldn't have felt anything"? I know for a fact that women react very sensitively to whomever they kiss and I am convinced that all of them that I've kissed so far were positive. I have a reputation for being a good kisser."

Here we go again a macho-playboy statement. I rolled my eyes, what an idiot!

"Hey, hey! I'm serious!" he reinforced his statement by pointing at me and showing his seriousness.

Then I gave a thought about it, scratching my chin.

"In other words, you're saying that I would have been satisfied from your kissing?"

Kakashi nodded proudly and this glint in his eye and that confident attitude underlined his seriousness of his statement. He approached me cornering me to the main trunk of the tree with either hand placed on my side to trap me. The crease forming in his mouth region proved that he was smirking.

"It's a killer; you won't be able to stand on your legs anymore."

It gave my heart a start and I shivered the way he looked at me, so intensively. His hand readily fingered his mask, prepared to pull it down any minute now. He looked so serious about all of this that one part of me was urging him on but the other part decided to be rebellious.

"Are you serious?" I doubted him and he still kept his attitude.

"Why do you doubt me? Doesn't my behaviour convince you?"

I observed what he meant, his confident attitude and not to mention in what position he was, WAY TOO CLOSE!! Stubbornly I shook my head.

"I think you're teasing me."

Kakashi gave a confident chortle.

"Obviously someone here has completely lost their respect towards their teacher. I'll restore that respect when I'm done with you."

Threateningly Kakashi's face approached mine and with difficulty I tried pushing him away with my hands and shrieked.

"Wait! Wait!"

Abruptly my wrists were banged against the trunk and he pressed firmly with his hands. His now uncovered face hovered before my face, which revealed his cunning smirk.

"You owe me a lot, respect, apologies, explanations and not to mention some money."

"What?" I croaked.

"Yep. Firstly respect: how should I say, you treat me as a mediocre person which I am not. I master more than 1000 techniques, participated in over 20 S-rank missions, have experience and am a great deal older, which makes me an expert above your level and standards. Secondly apologies: I cannot remember how many times you have insulted and disrespected me without once apologizing, which shows that you've got no manners."

I heard his listing with growing contempt, although he was right with some points. I tend to forget to apologize and I do admit that I am a bit rude, but still making me look like the bad person was the worst thing to do.

"Thirdly explanations: strange things have occurred to me since you arrived to Konoha and in my life, which I cannot explain. The culprit left some evidence on me or rather left an effect on me. Last time I could have sworn that somebody kissed me several times and strange enough it only occurred when your presence was near. I vaguely remember something yesterday, also the time you fled to Akai after you knocked me out and not to forget down at the lake when you kissed me back."

My heart made a start. What was he saying? He claims to remember that somebody kissed him and he suspects me? For an idiot he sure is very clever... Still that doesn't solve anything!! What should I do?! What if he finds out about my feelings now? If that happens what will be the consequences? Plus isn't he being too calm and confident for such a matter?

"Also…" he began and withdrew his hand from my wrist and pinched a part of his mask that covered his neck and pulled it down.

Then he pointed to one spot on his neck.

"Can you explain me this?"

My eyes followed his finger that indicated a point on his neck and my heart squeezed unpleasantly. Damn! He noticed the hickey! Anyway it was such a brainless and reckless thing to do, I was such an idiot!

"You know I did get drunk but I was alone and I don't know what happened last night although you told me some of it, I'm sure you are the only culprit that did, this."

He observed me intensively as if searching for the answer in my eyes, since I've lost the will to speak in the moment, I was sure my face was betraying me.

"And lastly, money: I don't believe you ever considered the word "money" when you started living in my place. Like all adults I have to pay my debts with my shinobi salary and since you use my place like your own, you haven't bothered thinking about giving me hand or bothered even noticing it - Overall you owe me a lot." He concluded his listing in a calculative way, which made him sound like an ego-centric mister-know-it-all playboy.

Witnessing that side of his, seriously changed my opinion about him.

"And?"

"And?! Well aren't you going to compensate?"

"How? Since I'm such a baaad person that lacks all qualities?" I retorted with sarcasm and Kakashi chuckled confidently.

"There is a way to compensate."

I didn't like the sound of that.

"As a punishment/compensation you have to endure my kiss without resistance."

His face came even closer, his lips so close to mine, but I turned my head away blushing profusely.

"Isn't there another way?" I whimpered.

Kakashi chuckled and breathed in my ear with skilful seduction.

"Yes, it's to continue from where we stopped last night."

I pulled away and struggled fiercely against him, clearly disagreeing with both options.

"I don't want ANY of it, Kakashi! I'll do anything you want except that!" I exclaimed with fright, but instead Kakashi gripped my chin and turned it to him.

"You'll have to accept one of them, there are no other options. It is the only way to compensate." He said with a serious attitude now, his gaze piercing as usual.

I stared blankly at him. Why was he so serious about this? I'm sure there would be other easier and not embarrassing ways to compensate for all of this? Why this method, this typical shoujo manga with compensation by kissing or other shit?! It made me so furious, only pervs would have such thoughts! After all that guy in front of me is one, so why the hell didn't I predict such a thing like that? Anyway I have no choice; I'll certainly NOT take the second option!

"The first option." I muttered without looking into Kakashi's eyes.

"Good. The less you resist the shorter it is."

"Only kissing, right?" I asked to make sure that I was right.

Kakashi nodded now trying to reach my lips but I interrupted the process by giving a last firm statement.

"Your tricks are dirty and unfair remember that! It's going against my will."

Kakashi smirked.

"Let's see if your will shall hold out after I've made you so hot." He whispered lustfully that my cursed heart jumped.

I was ready to resist after hearing such an abnormal seductive statement from him, however it was crushed by Kakashi's lips. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Kakashi was kissing me! Wasn't that one of my dreams of being kissed by a conscious Kakashi? I stood there staring blankly, frozen from head to toe, in front of Kakashi. His smooth lips brushing, sucking and caressing mine with such care and growing passion. For the first time I felt this growing heat in me and the dizziness overcoming me. My feelings were burning for him, craving for every single touch, breath, smell and words of his. How much I desired his lips to kiss me anywhere.

His kissing developed from gentle to growing and overwhelming passion. I found my hands clinging to his shoulder, since his lips devoured my own making me extremely dizzy. I was eager to respond to signal that I was enjoying it and I wanted him to feel the equal pleasure. I released his shoulders and laced my arms around his neck. However by doing that and plus kissing him back, he abruptly pulled back. He was out breath but still focused, his cold face scared me and he took a hold of my arms from his neck and slammed them sharply against the trunk, keeping them pinned. His face hovered in front of mine.

"For responding you are getting punished."

Before I could say another word, his lips crushed mine again. He devoured my lips so hungrily that my legs gave in, but he held me by wrapping his arms around my frame and pulling me closely to him which made me gasp in the kiss. Rapt by passion, he easily threw one leg of mine around his waist and held it so that I couldn't pull it away. Purposely he pressed his entire body against mine to send a shockingly excitable and enticing sensation down my body that made me want to moan. My body shivered and writhed as these strange sensations took control over my boiling body. A muffled triumphing chuckle came from Kakashi. All of a sudden his tongue lashed over my lower lip, creating a panicked sensation in the pit of my stomach.

Briskly his hands let go off everything that they held before and clasped around my head. His tongue plunged into my mouth and his mouth devoured my lips hungrily. The sudden presence of his tongue in my mouth shocked me so much that I showed some resistance but his arms wrapped firmly around my body could contain my pitiful resistance. The fierceness of his kissing and of his tongue shocked me so much that I thought he was going to rip off my mouth and suffocate me with his tongue. His tongue lashed about my mouth exploring everywhere and finally came in contact with my tongue.

My legs were wobbly and the heat was still present, pricking my body every time to go further. Horrifyingly I had the taste of Kakashi now in my mouth, his tongue lashing competitively against mine and his body holding my own. My resistance died away so quickly and my whole body felt like jelly. And when I thought I was going to pass out from the heat and the growing desire, Kakashi pulled his head away, a thread of saliva hung between the tips of our tongues and for a split second his eyes were glazed with heavy lust as he met my eyes. However pride overcame his features. He licked the salvia from his lips and tongue as if enjoying its taste. I observed him, my heart pounding, feeling fuzzy and hazy from what just happened.

"I warned you that it was going to be a killer. You are lucky that I stopped in time." He mentioned with teeming confidence.

Now I realized the chill of the breeze. My face was red and my body still was boiling with those powerful addictive feelings. It was already totally embarrassing and disgusting to feel such feelings for that guy, even though this was only an action to compensate. Kakashi released me and I stumbled backwards against the trunk, sliding down and sitting on the bough with my knees pulled up. I lowered my face and buried it in my palms. I never felt so humiliated and embarrassed in my life! My legs still shivered not from the cold but what happened. I released a heavy sigh, relieving the tension in my system and to regain some control over my body. Kakashi kneeled down in front of me and revealed with amusement.

"You are one horny girl."

"SHUT UP!" I roared hoarsely and tried kicking Kakashi in the face but he caught it easily.

"Don't have to overreact; it's not like we had sex."

Well you freaking jerk, thanks for making the whole damn situation worse by being so direct! Can't you see how angry I am because of that, because it nearly felt like it! You said only kissing and what the hell did you do, you did more than that, you, you….ARGH! It's too embarrassing to even think or remember it! I hate that jerk! I groaned and pulled my foot back with such anger and frustration that I fell off the tree and landed in the last second on my wobbling feet.

It's incredible how much such a tiny event can bring me down to my knees. I walked over to a tree to lean against it in order to get my breathing straight again and to cool down my body.

"Sara, are you okay?" asked Kakashi with concern who stood behind me.

"Well, duh! I feel like jelly, I might puke any minute now and die of a heart attack! YEA I feel terrific!" I snapped with sarcasm and held onto the tree for support.

There was a brief pause and then I mentioned something.

"I hope I compensated enough to make a complete fool of myself, go ahead laugh."

Kakashi paused again before continuing in a serious tone.

"Come on let's go, I'll carry you."

I spun around and couldn't believe my ears.

"Are you kidding? After such a thing do you seriously think I want to be carried on your back? No, that won't happen!" I strictly refused and walked over to another tree and leaned my back against it and hung my head.

"Just give me some time…" I mumbled

Hiding behind a tree gave me sometime to reconsider everything. Kakashi didn't bother checking on me, since my message was clear enough that I needed some time alone. My fingers brushed my lips and instantly I had the flashback of Kakashi kissing me. My body was marked by Kakashi's touches. On one hand it felt terrific this sensation but on the other I was furious over what happened. It felt more like an old man - well sorry a 26 year old guy - just wanted to take advantage of me either because he was missing this close contact to women or simply because he was a pervert. Either way I wasn't happy of this, this way how to compensate things! It was…ARGH!!! Anyway what can I do about it?! What can I do about the fact that this idiot is a lecher? Nothing much really, but luckily this guy understood where the limits were and by leaving me alone was the proof.

My whole body couldn't settle down, it was boiling and what disgusted me the most was that I wanted more… My body simply couldn't get enough of him; it was like an addiction… Why did I have to love him so much? Why couldn't those feelings just cease to annoy me and make my life easier? Sara, can't you see you are getting too attached to this place and to an Anime character that breaths absolutely no life in your world! Why waste so much energy for this guy? I whined miserably, my head is such turmoil that I preferred not to think about anything else for the moment! I am confused, first I like it than I don't and I usually conclude by getting depressed. I haven't imagined love to be so complex and painful, especially if it's one-sided. With a groan I slammed my fists against the tree, to release my frustration and to discipline my body.

Fortunately but gradually my body was calming down, although mentally I wasn't prepared to face that guy. It was horrifying how much he could affect me with only this; I just wanted to appear that I wasn't affected by this, thing. By grabbing handfuls of snow I cooled my senses and placed my cold hands against my hot cheeks. I shook my legs a bit and found myself back to normal again. Physically I was strong yet mentally I wasn't entirely recovered. I put my rucksack on and climbed up the tree by walking up to the bough. Kakashi sat a few trees away on the bough, sitting against the trunk. He appeared as usual calm and casual; there were absolutely no hints of what happened before. I was always amazed how he could react so casual about this or was it because he didn't care at all? I made my way to the bough he sat on and when I landed on his with my gaze averted, I suggested that we leave.

"I think we should go and speed up our paces, because I don't intend to sleep in the snow."

Judging by Kakashi's brief pause before responding, he seemed to be contemplating over my behaviour. Well duh, how am I supposed to act around him after that?! He got up and responded calmly.

"Let's go then, I'll lead the way as usual."

He hopped already to the next bough and I followed him. Our clashes were bound to bring to a moment of self-reflection and embarrassment, but I believe I was the only one that was affected by it… I wonder if Kakashi already realized my feelings?


	33. Chapter 32

**OMG!!! ALREADY ABOUT 120 REVIEWS!!! WOW!! YOU guys are so awesome!!! I love you all!! Here's a pre- x-mas present and I will post some chapter on christmas^^ So I expect some juicy reviews from you guys and don't disappoint me^^**

**

* * *

CHAPTER THIRTY TWO**

- The senseless battle on the ocean -

In amazing speedy and swift paces, we stepped out of the border of the Kiri realm at last. I was fed up of fog, rain and snow and unfortunately that weather matched terribly with my mood. I was tiered and fed up of everything; I guess we literally raced through the whole damn country in one night!

By the first light of dawn Kakashi came to a halt and we found ourselves at the shore of an ocean! I could identify patches of land in the distance but the main land was nowhere to be seen!

"Where the hell are we?" it slipped out of my mouth unintentionally.

"At the border of the realm of water, obviously we have to cross the ocean to reach mainland."

I gaped at the sight of this endless ocean and the tiny patches island up ahead.

"But, I haven't seen any ocean when we arrived to the water country." I mentioned still stupefied at the sight of this ocean.

"We took a great detour on land and this way will bring us in a day or two if the weather permits, back to the fire country."

"In other words this is the short cut."

"Yup."

"Then why the hell haven't we taken that short cut to arrive here?" I complained moodily feeling gloomy from the lack of sleep and the lack of energy.

Kakashi kept his face transfixed to the ocean and simply stated:

"If we had taken this way in the beginning we could have attracted a lot of unpleasant attention."

I followed his gaze, hoping to understand what he meant by "unpleasant attention".

"Are you trying to say that the short cut is dangerous?"

Kakashi now looked at me and nodded calmly.

"Since this route used to be the trading connection between Konoha and Kiri, it tends to get disrupted by brutes that steal the goods and make a living out of it."

"Do you mean sea bandits?"

"Something like that only that they are strong and sometimes fearsome opponents, you never know what they may pull out of their sleeves, but these are only rumours."

"So where do they attack or have their hide-outs?"

Kakashi raised his arm and pointed at the horizon.

"Do you see this space between the two islands? This is where the goods are usually shipped through to come to Kiri. It was said that during the war it used to be a border where the Kiri officials would check the ships for enemies, but after the war they abandoned that job and that is where the outcasts or outlaws would find refuge. Inevitably they grew to a bunch of sea bandits, roaming the oceans and robbing as much as they pleased." Kakashi told in his Anbu-mode, which I thought was quite interesting and pleasant to observe.

"However, the Kiri government decided to put an end to this trading route and steered the ships around this area bringing them closer to the main village of Kiri and erasing this trading link from the map. So for maybe ten years this link hasn't been used, so hopefully we won't meet any obstacles."

My attention was veered off by the blazing sunlight at the horizon and I expressed my admiration for the beauty of the sunrise.

"Woah! It's so beautiful, look at the colours." I pointed with marvel at dawn and grabbed his arm to turn his attention to the sunrise.

For a split second Kakashi acted stiffly, but gave in when I directed his attention to the sunrise and he did admit the beauty of the sunrise, only that he sounded pretty nostalgic about it.

"Countless times in my life I've encountered the sunrise and never could enjoy its beauty, not until…"

I looked at him when his sentence died away so fast and its there my heart made a jump, Kakashi's gaze was soft and he still looked to the sunrise.

"Not until you came along." His gaze was now on me, no teasing or toying glint was in his eye, he was actually showing some sincerity.

I averted my gaze and before I could move away he held my hand the same way we did in the forest.

"It is thanks to you that I can feel things again like the sunrise and other sensations that I thought I have forgotten." He thanked me, but instead of rejoicing it I felt even worse.

What sensations or feelings did he mean anyway?

"What sort of sensations?" I repeated quietly without looking at him.

"Treasuring important moments in life."

"What sort of moments?"

"Many, value of friendship, expressing appreciation towards things that should move you and the moment when you bathe in that happiness. I think it's thanks to your presence that I've begun to reflect over things that I haven't thought about-

-Cut it out!" I exclaimed bitterly and faced him with frustration.

"What are you talking about? What sensations, what moments do you mean and no matter how many times I ask the same damn question you answer them in riddles? Why is that? Why do you create such confusion in me? For one moment you are like this and right after you are like that. How am I supposed to understand you when you try so hard to conceal yourself?"

Kakashi stared at me, he didn't calculate with that reaction and in one sense it did trigger something. I pulled my hand back and paced through the dark sand with my back facing his direction.

"No matter how clear and concise you speak I feel you are constantly avoiding something. You lack depth and honesty that I require to understand you or to get an idea of your character. I'm confused about your actions towards me, on one hand I think you hate me and on the other you like me and sometimes it's neither. Can you stop running away from what you are afraid of and be more direct, please!"

There were no movements made - only the sound of the ocean washing over the shore and drawing back into the water - echoed through the emptiness of the beach.

"I cannot be direct in what regards emotions and feelings and Sara you know that. Some things are just meant to be kept secret and whether you can accept it or not that's how it is." He answered with melancholy and I spun around unsatisfied of his answer and stormed up to him.

"You see? Once again you are brief and off subject! Good grief! Quit that will you! I need to get some things set straight here before my hopes and beliefs are raised far too high for me to cope with. Now just answer the damn question and you won't be bothered about it anymore!"

Now I've got Kakashi's attention focused on me and now I must find out the truth no matter what the consequences may be! The distant waves slammed against the cliffs, sending some vibration throughout the ground, singing a tone deaf song. The sea gulls now began to cry over the ocean and circled the sky on the look out for food. The wind gusted through the ocean, washing more waves to shore. It was like nature was encouraging me to spit out, what I have been planning to tell him the whole time I was with him. However before that I needed to get some confirmation about things and if the time was right I will tell him. We stood there staring at each other and I took a deep breath and spoke.

"I've got to know what your interests in me are. I won't let you pass without giving me a clear answer."

Brutally the waves crashed against the battered cliff, deafening all other sounds around us. For the first time I could see that Kakashi was hesitating even struggling over my statement. His eyes were wide, the statement brought him to a state of startle and disbelief. Since he seemed to be searching for an answer, I reinforced my voice and stated another point

"I've been trying to perceive your actions, but like I said I end up confused. First you welcome me than reject me than again welcome me and then reject me again. Don't you think it's confusing and irritating to repeat those actions? Dammit it, you have only one choice, either acceptance or rejection and not both!"

"All the actions like the part where you kissed me in front of the lake, the time where you were suspicious and shoved me against the wall, the countless times you hugged me, your attempts to corner me, flirting and kissing me, the time in the tent, the incident where you so-called mistaken me for a prostitute, then in the Fuhei residence your attempts to kiss me and your gentle words about forgiveness and all that. Also the moment in the bathroom and you kissing my neck and finally your brutal and erotic kissing – these events don't they prove one thing? That you like me not as a friend or a student but more as a woman, answer me Kakashi!"

Kakashi was speechless and more disbelieved then ever before. I was sure he wasn't expecting me to list all these so-called "incidents" we shared. His eyes darkened and he lowered his gaze and then he turned his back on me. My heart hammered feverously against my chest and with anticipation I awaited his answer.

A silent moment of tension filled between us, he observed as the waves washed over the shore and brushed his sandals. It frustrated me so much that I couldn't even perceive what he was thinking about or how he was reacting to this. However after the sound of crashing waves, beating against the distant cliff he spoke again, but this time with resolve.

"Sara, have you forgotten your position?"

It gave me a shock when I heard his rather serious response and already I began to regret that I ever brought up the subject.

"But-

-Not a word! Let me remind you because obviously you have forgotten what position you are in and not to mention where I fit in!" he faced me now with a cold and serious face, "I'm your sensei and you are my pupil, if you haven't noticed I'm operating a three-timed mission. One is to return to Konoha to accomplish our current mission, secondly that we return back to Konoha safely without getting killed and thirdly I'm still appointed to supervise you. You are still considered as a prisoner and I must pay attention whether you are a fugitive or not."

"I am mostly aware of my position, but the question is, are YOU aware about it?" I talked back at him, standing my ground and giving him a scowl.

Kakashi for a split second seemed to want to attack me, but gave up the attempt to do so and I continued.

"And anyway isn't this an excuse, only because I'm your pupil and prisoner, it doesn't give you the right to behave like this around me, senselessly flirting around with me! It is you who forgotten your position, not me!"

All of a sudden I was shoved against the nearby tree, Kakashi's hands gripped my throat firmly and his gaze was piercing and cold.

"Don't you dare question my authority! I am forbidden to answer any of those questions! You know it better than I do and I am sure you are practising it as well as I am, since you come from another dimension-

-What?!" I sputtered with disbelief and the dread began to fill my body.

"Your demon revealed it to me. We are both desperate enough to get each other out of our lives, am I right? You want to go home and I want to go back to my life. Anyway when we return to Konoha, I'll be relieved from my duty and the Hokage will have full authority over you. I can warn you already that if you try to escape I have the Hokage's permission to kill you."

I stared in shock at Kakashi. This guy was serious about everything and the worst was I realized what a jerk he was, how unreliable and egocentric he was. Not only that, I realized how naïve I was to let this all happen to me. I began to fear that all of his was a set up to squeeze out information about me and report it to Tsunade. My first idea was to run away, run far away, away from Konoha and live in hiding and even rot in this damn place! I felt it was my time to leave and in a quiet voice and with my gaze sunk I confessed:

"Whether you believe it or not I treasured every moment that I've spent with you, even it were the worst moments, because you are the first person that I considered to be precious to me. I can understand if all this was premeditated, after all who would want to stick with me anyway? I wish we could have met under different circumstance than I'm sure we would have gotten along better."

Kakashi's grip was loose now; my words brought him to become speechless and somewhat disbelieved. I was sure he was observing me with mixed feelings. Now I took an air of over-confidence and smirked.

"I don't care if everybody regards me as a criminal, but like you correctly expressed - nobody wants to be stuck with somebody they can't stand - especially those who lie and back stab them."

I looked at Kakashi and smirked with conceit.

"It's been nice meeting you Hatake Kakashi." I shoved him away and ran to the shore and walked on the surface of the ocean.

With outstretched arms, I marked myself as a target.

"Now it's your chance Kakashi, give it a shot, and kill me if you are so desperate - because I am running away." I stated and snickered and turned my back on him and simply ran off across the ocean.

I realized that the water was very unstable and it was difficult to keep my concentration of chakara in my soles. Also why was I so damn afraid of the ocean, isn't water my element?! I heard something rushed passed my ears and noticed a glint from star shaped weapon. A shuriken? I turned my head and noticed Kakashi running after me with weapons in his hands. I focused my attention back in front where I was heading to. Kakashi you won't get me that easily, I need to release some steam and annoy you, that's my sweet little revenge! I took up my speed and went faster, however all of a sudden a water clone appeared in front of me, blocking my passage and I pulled out my kunais and stormed towards it. I slashed myself through it and kept on running. Pretty lame his techniques, hopefully he's got more.

There was a sudden crash of water and I found myself trapped by a serpent made of water, its grip tightened around me and down below stood Kakashi, his fingers formed into a jutsu sign. His face observed mine with his cold calculative gaze. I struggled against the grip of this serpent, but it was in vain and Kakashi showed some triumph.

"Don't get too cocky, I'm better than you. I'll give you a chance either you surrender calmly or die."

"Over my dead body, asshole!" I growled

"As you wish…" Kakashi uttered and without a movement or a word the snake plunged into the ocean dragging me deeper and deeper down.

I couldn't believe this; Kakashi was actually really serious about killing me. I think its time for me to show who's tougher. I closed my eyes and let myself get dragged down, I needed to remain calm. Finally I sensed this odd connection between me and the water and with a strong resolve the serpent dissolved and the water pushed me up towards the surface. I broke the surface with such an impact that I soared up skywards and landed on my feet on top of the surface again. I panted for air and became furious and stood at my full height, encountering the confident Kakashi.

"You made a grave mistake to bring me here, I have enormous advantage now, so long Kakashi." I snickered and jumped back into the water.

I had the ocean at my command now. I could swim with such ease and speed like I never did before, I practically became one with the water and my body just flow like the current.

The urge for oxygen became intense so that I swam back to the surface to take in some oxygen. Now I swam in between the tips of the two islands, where the so-called bandits would lurk. When I heaved myself back on the surface, I was brutally pulled up by my collar and my feet hung over the water. Kakashi looked at me with indifference and I grasped his firm hands that held my throat, trying to separate them.

"Let go of me you brute!" I snarled

"I don't think so, after an attempt of escape I have no choice but to kill you." The seriousness in his voice sent a shockwave down my body and his cold gaze sent a shrill down my spine.

He was dead serious about this and I stupidly believed he wouldn't harm me, how pathetic. Kakashi's grip tightened and slowly I stopped resisting and dropped my arms to my sides. If he kills me now, so be it, at least dying in his hands rather than somebody else's. However something struck me when I looked in Kakashi's eyes, I haven't told him yet and I surely won't let him kill me. I'll give him a good beating and we'll see if he's going to listen. I swung my legs around his waist and out of that brisk action he released my throat and I tightened my legs around his waist. He was even more surprised to find me clinging like this to him, his eyes were wide and the words were stuck in his mouth. I realized in what awkward positions we were, but I realized that Kakashi was affected by this a lot more than I was, how interesting. So my closeness does affect him after all.

Anyway hasn't it occurred several times that he simply lost his voice or reacted rather nervously at my close presence? I decided to use an unfair trick, I wanted to get his butt-kicked and I wanted to use any methods even it meant cheating. I let my hands slither skilfully up his chest, his muscles begun to tense up and I took that as a sign that I was succeeding. My hands travelled up his chest to his neck, where I laced one arm around his neck and my other free hand climbed up his neck, skilfully caressing him. I was quite surprised what a huge impact I had on him, how tense he became and how his breath shuddered, I wasn't the only person that was equally sensitive. I raised my head to be at the same level as his and I grazed my face over his cheek, so that my lips touched his ear.

"I'm not the only one who's sensitive here." I breathed with such seduction and briskly tightened my legs around his waist, giving Kakashi a little shake.

I pulled back and seductively caressed his face, my face inched close to his and I pretended to be full of desire. Kakashi was in my grasp now, he was falling for my bait, in his body language and his eyes he was full of desire. His arms laced around my back and not once did his craving eyes left mine. I fingered his mask and slowly pulled it down, just when his mask reached halfway down his ridge, I could feel his blistering and shuddering breath against my face. I couldn't help but smirk at him.

"Foolish men." I uttered than briskly fell back, catapulting Kakashi forcefully backwards and he crashed in the water.

I dived into the ocean after him. He had let himself sink and I swam to him and punched him in the stomach so that he shot out of the water. I swam after him and jumped out of the water, standing on the surface of the water again. Kakashi rested one knee on the surface with one arm laced around his stomach, he observed me with a confident face.

"Not bad, that was sneaky and unpredictable and I fell for it." He admitted with confidence, but he didn't show himself defeated.

"Anyway you still underestimate me as usual, because I know your fighting technique now and I know how to eliminate you."

I stood firmly, not moved by the slightest thing he said and I looked down on him with cold eyes and sniggered.

"You only know a part of it, go on eliminate me. Surprise me with your all-so-great techniques." I taunted him and stood prepared to attack.

Kakashi stood up, the confidence evident in his face and he eyed me. All of a sudden he vanished and I was propelled back by a powerful blow with such ferocity that I skipped ten meters over the surface of the water and crashed into the water. Too late I realized Kakashi was under water, he welcomed me with punches in the face and kicks in the stomach. The oxygen was squeezed out of my system from the impacts of the blows, I tried paddling up to the surface but Kakashi shot his arm around my neck and pointed a sharp weapon against my back. The panic for oxygen caused me to ram my back against the kunai, letting it pierce my flesh, the pain was horrible. A bubble escaped my mouth and the water appeared slightly red from my blood. Kakashi had released me and I kicked myself off and swam desperately to the surface.

I reached the surface and gasped for air. I breathed so shallowly and quickly like never before, trying to regain some oxygen into my system. I climbed up the surface and lay on the surface of the water. My sight was getting all fuzzy. With my shaking hand I groped my back until I came across the weapon stuck in my back. I felt the energy fading away caused by the injury. I immediately sensed Kakashi's presence and I moved my head and found him standing not so far away from my head. With a grunt I wrenched the kunai out of my back, the blood splattered over me and I clenched the kunai and weakly and tremblingly got up on my knees than on my staggering feet.

All of a sudden, something blocked my breathing passage and I retched up some blood in my palms. My lungs felt so heavy and I observed my bloody palm and then with resolve I clenched my bloody palm and eyed Kakashi.

"Okay, I've been waiting for a battle of life and death anyway. Come on, bring it on Kakashi, it's your only chance now to express your fury against me."

I turned away from him and walked towards the direction where I intended to go, which Kakashi blocked the way. The dizziness and fuzziness attacked me but I shook it out of my system by persevering. I held the bloody kunai in my hand and kept on walking. Abruptly I deflected Kakashi's attack on me with my kunai. We stood there pressing our kunais against one another; our hostile gazes crossed each other. I felt a ball of blood pressing to get out of my mouth and I retched so strongly that I could barely hold my balance anymore. An idea caught me and I met Kakashi's gaze with a cold glare, I gathered some blood in my mouth and spat across Kakashi's face. I took advantage of his distracted state and sliced him against his side. A grunt escaped him and I attacked him with a punch in his face and a kick against his fresh injury. Kakashi staggered backwards, grasping his wound on his side, he wore such a painful grimace that it squeezed my heart so painfully. Then Kakashi showed a confident face, although the pain was written all over his face.

"You sure can act well, deceiving all of us by acting innocent and weak…" panted Kakashi, making a fool of himself for being naïve.

"You pretend not to know anything about the shinobi world and sometimes quite boldly you leak out your association with the shinobi world, isn't that quite suspicious? You don't show surprise neither interest towards new things, it's like you spied on us before arriving in Konoha, absorbing important information so that you can easily adapt to this world. I don't understand why I didn't realize earlier that you came from another dimension, it makes clearly sense now, because you seem to predict every movement, speech and even expect what the reactions may be. Your knowledge on names of shinobis, shinobi techniques and other things has made you suspicious. Additionally you are concealing information regarding various things, especially when you observed Sasuke from time to time and react without surprise at his sudden leave of Konoha and also what regards me you know a great deal of my past without me mentioning." He told with seriousness and eyed me with suspicion.

"What are you? Who are you? Where are you from and what's your purpose here?"

My lips curled to a smirk, it pleased me to hear Kakashi sounding so anxious and alert about my knowledge of this world, and it gave me some energy back to scare him a bit and to be overconfident.

"Who cares where I come from or what I am? What's my purpose here I don't know my only memory is that I was sucked into a portal and brought here. Yes, I do know everything about shinobis, the events of past and what will happen in the future, however I cannot predict my future in the shinobi world, what my presence will have influence on or predict any fights that I encounter. I'm like a side character in a story that doesn't get close to the main plot of the story and that has no power or whatsoever to change the actual story and will one day disappear from the story forever. You could say my trip here was to get a taste of how it feels like to be a shinobi and unfortunately it's too repulsive." I told him calmly with conceit and continued.

"Anyway I don't understand what threat I pose onto Konoha or anywhere, but what's sure I am fed of those who judge without understanding or evidence. Anyway think what you want! Believe that I am a buddy of Orochimaru or Akatsuki or any great criminal from the Bingo book, go ahead kill me without proof of my allegiance to any of them!"

I stood with dignity and bravery in front of Kakashi, who now regained some energy.

"Let's make a deal. If you lose this fight you let me go without calling any back-up to capture me." I suggested

"What if I win?"

I gave a confident smirk.

"If you win, I'll surrender and become your captive and you can ship me off to the next prison."

Kakashi chortled with confidence.

"Placing such a risky bet will bound to backfire."

"Don't underestimate me Kakashi, like I said you haven't seen everything yet."

"And it counts the same thing for me."

We faced each other in our fighting position; the seriousness in our gazes sent a shock to our surroundings. The water became wild and a stampede of dark clouds, galloped over the sky, covering the sky with rumbles of thunder and light droplets. Even the water repelled away from our zone. I noticed Kakashi pushed up his headgear to reveal his Sharingan, this meant he was serious. I waited with anticipation and now we stormed against each other. The waves repelled away from our fighting zone with such ferocity that it caused tidal waves towards the shores. From far it looked like sparks of lightning clashing above the ocean level. The echoing sound of metal clanging and grazing each other like swords brushing against another, mingled with the rumbling dark clouds above our heads. Angry grunts and battle cries followed as new injuries were inflicted. It was a battle between the anger of nature and the anger between foolish humans. The blades of our kunais brandished and brushed and occasionally grazed each other's skins. Clashes of physical confrontation grew stronger without mercy. When our punches or kicks met, I regarded Kakashi as my enemy not anymore as the Kakashi I knew. So much anger was bottled in me; I wanted to kick his butt so badly, because I believed he needed it. The water beneath our feet went wild and I realized that it was acting according to my emotions. The anticipation to use water techniques against Kakashi burned so strongly, but I had to repress this urge because I knew this wasn't the right moment, yet.

All of a sudden I was sucked up in a hurricane conjured by one of Kakashi's 1000 techniques. I was spun, shaken and drowned in a spiral of towering and mounting water that climbed to the black clouds. The oxygen was suppressed from within the hurricane and when I reached the clouds, a sudden bolt of lightning struck me and I screamed insanely. Pure electricity charged into my body, burning me and bringing my body to shake frantically like an epilepsy attack. The hurricane was abruptly dissolved and I dropped hundred meters head first into the stormy ocean. I sunk deeper and deeper into the ocean until darkness engulfed me entirely.


	34. Chapter 33

**Wow, thx for THE AWESOME REVIEWS, YOU GUYS!!!! This chapter is maybe the second shortest one I have written, which means you will gobble it down within seconds or minutes^^ Now one thing I have to say about this chapter: DON'T KILL ME PLEASE!!!!!!!!!**

**Enjoy^^**

**

* * *

CHAPTER THIRTY THREE**

- The sea bandit's offer -

I woke up to the sounds of the waves washing pleasantly over the shore. I heard some whispering and somebody trying to shush them down. There I opened my eyes and encountered with a shriek four heads gathered around me.

"She's still alive?!" mentioned the first man with disbelief.

"How could that be?!" mentioned the second one equally disbelieved.

"Wasn't she struck by lightning?" mentioned the third one and the fourth one observed me with a critical face.

I gaped at the fourth guy.

"Ka-kashi?" I muttered with disbelief, as my wide eyes noticed the fourth guy for the first time.

The fourth guy looked at me with confusion and shook his head.

"I don't know any Kakashi."

"Maybe it's her companion." Suggested the guy next to him.

"Nah, not her companion! If that silver haired guy fought her than I doubt he's her companion!" confirmed another guy thoughtfully.

I couldn't believe this; this guy was the spitting image of Kakashi! Except that his face wasn't covered by a mask, neither did he have a scared left eye or a Sharingan. However his silver hair was longer and tied to a pony tail giving me the impression that it was the White fang, Kakashi's dad. Nevertheless his carefree yet mature eyes did not resemble Kakashi at all. Now I took in his clothing and everybody else's. They were dressed in dark tissue combined with leather, giving the impression of a bunch of rogues or bandits.

"Where…Am…I?" I asked softly and the four heads exchanged looks.

"Well you were washed onto our island, Shogo and we brought you here."

"Am I on of the two islands near Kiri?" I asked them and the fourth guy nodded solemnly.

I sat up, biting in the searing pain that caused my body to protest with contempt. The four men backed up a bit to give me some space to sit up and the fourth guy was the only one giving me a critical and suspicious stare.

"What's your name?" questioned the fourth guy directly and with a moment of reflection I answered nervously.

"Uhm, uhh, it's Mizuno."

I gotten into the habit of changing names and since I was surrounded by those guys entrusting them with my real name would either attract Kakashi or whole damn Konoha. At random I thought about water and this name came to my mind.

"Where are you from, judging by your clothes and such, aren't you from Konoha and more precisely a shinobi?" the fourth guy interrogated me severely, giving me no chance whatsoever to slip out of the conversation.

His piercing gaze forced me to avert my gaze and I contemplated over what answer I should give him.

"I'm not from Konoha, I-

-If you aren't from Konoha than what about this pendant here?" he interrupted me sharply and my pendant dangled from his hand.

I snatched the pendant from his hand and held it tightly in mine. The guy smirked.

"Don't take us for fools. We know your kind anyway-

-Shut up! I'm not from Konoha, you retard! If I would be than why was I fighting a guy from that village, HUH?"

The three other men were shocked of my tone and exchanged anxious looks with each other and observed the fourth guy who was calm. He still kept his smirk.

"Very feisty you are and not to mention you are the first person that ever insulted me, which normally means I have to kill you." His eyes narrowed to a threat and I gulped uncomfortably and shrunk back.

However his interesting smirk reappeared and he continued.

"Nevertheless I'm beginning to like you. If you are not from Konoha than I suppose you are a shinobi?"

I averted my gaze and gave a melancholic smile. What was I anyway a captive to Konoha or a shinobi?

"I don't know what I am. One moment I'm brought to Konoha, treated as a captive and a spy and than treated with respect than later mistreated because I'm different! My freedom and rights are suppressed, I'm being exploited and humiliated by that freaking' jerk that is my supervisor and that is why I rebelled against him and end up in a fight!" I spoke with such frustration that I realized that I've blabbered out too much information.

"So in other words you are a captive from Konoha?"

I nodded.

"I have observed your fighting and you do fight well, however that guy underestimated your resistance."

I became wide awake and spluttered with impatience.

"You saw the fight? Everything?!"

The guy nodded

"Until the very end."

"What about the guy? Is he- is he around?" I asked with anxiety and the guy shook his head.

"He left right after you were struck by lightning."

My muscles loosened up, yet internally I was disappointed. What else was I expecting anyway? I deliberately ran away and he did what he was ordered to. However I wonder, did Kakashi really think I was dead?

"It looks like to me that you regret being here." Assumed the guy with interest, but I protested with contempt.

"What are you talking about?"

"You see, your face tells everything. Were you that attached to that guy?"

"Of course not! That guy is such a selfish and ruthless bastard! Believe me I'm happy that he's gone back!"

The double of Kakashi chuckled with amusement and for once it didn't make my eyes roll. It was a manly yet suave chuckle that I liked a lot.

"I can tell he was unbearable."

"You have no idea, he literally held me at a leach."

The guy gave an amused smirk and stood up.

"Since you are without a home and purpose and suffered the same rejection as we did. I suggested that you join our group."

"What kind of group?"

The guy turned around, he tied a black scarf around his head and answer with a proud voice.

"The sea bandits, of course."

I observed the guy with wide eyes and uttered with fascination.

"Ooooo, you mean plundering and stealing stuff from ships or whatsoever and becoming filthy rich?"

The guy nodded with a smirk. I gave a thought about it. I was anyway quite sick and tiered of Kakashi and entire Konoha and also fed up of everything related to a shinobi life style. I thought about his proposal with a wide grin.

"Anyway I got no place to go or nothing to do – so - count me in."

The guy kneeled down and held out his hand.

"Welcome to the gang, I'm Gin."

I shook his hand firmly and gave him a determined smirk. I was blinded by my frustration that I didn't care about the consequences of my actions. The offer to join this gang was the only way for me to lighten up and do something else for a change. After all I wanted to get a taste of everything and also this was a sweet revenge towards Kakashi. I didn't mind letting that idiot believe I was dead, truthfully I had to take a real break and some distance from him. And anyway Gin's gang seemed quite interesting, especially Gin. However what I didn't realize is that I was going to underestimate the amount of time I would spend with the sea bandit.


	35. Chapter 34

**HIYAAAAAA!!! Thankies for all reviews and PHEW!! I thought you guys were going to kill me because of the new OC, poor Ronen suffered that (may he rest in peace) Anyway got good news... My story will soon end, so bear with me a little longer, ok? As usual R&R, give me big ones, baby!!! and ENJOY!!! Happy New Year, YAAAAAY!!!**

**

* * *

CHAPTER THIRTY FOUR**

- A full fledged sea bandit -

Believe it or not, I spend a whole month with the sea bandits and grew to become one myself. Four weeks of plundering, robbing off some ships and occasionally attacking random ships for fun, turned out to be the fun of my life. I've become colder, deceptive and quite a thief. I could steal the tinniest things from people without them realizing it. Not to mention I became quite popular, Gin was getting happier and happier as his treasures grew. Our secret location was in a cavern situated nearby some heavy jagged rocks and moss. The enemy had difficulty finding our location and this place was comfortable for the entire grew since it was equipped with furnitures stolen from ships. I had my own room, which was behind a tiny water fall inside another cavern. My room was well concealed and guaranteed some privacy. I had to admit it was difficult for the first couple of days to live there because I was the only woman among fifty men, however luckily Gin became sort of my guardian and scared off any unpleasant and disgusting behaving men.

As the days drew on gradually I adapted to the atmosphere, the people and the place so that I became somehow manly and a bandit. Then gradually the more ships we robbed the more the crew grew to accept me and respect me. Later on I was promoted to the executive leader, ranking below Gin who was the leader. Gin and I became good pals, we had foolish times making pranks to people and joking around. He was like an older brother to me, but at the same time painfully reminded me too much of Kakashi. However I began to like him more than Kakashi, he was open towards his emotions and feelings and without difficult he could express them. He could laugh and joke and never appear plain. Sometimes I wished that Kakashi could be like Gin.

However on one fateful day, my growing liking towards Gin changed drastically when he came into my room. I lay on my bed staring at the damp ceiling, when I noticed his presence in my room and sat up.

"Just stay there I'll come over." He said and I noticed he seemed a bit nervous and out of breath.

He sat on my bed beside me, his back facing me and his elbows placed on his lap and his face resting in his palms and heaving a frustrated breath. Feeling concerned I questioned him:

"Gin, what's wrong did something happen?"

Gin gave a chortle and his gaze was still fixed in front of him.

"We've got trouble."

"Really what kind of?" I felt anxious about his behaviour and hoped he would answer quickly, but he seemed to be in thoughts.

After a brief pause, he said with bitterness:

"I realized since you became part of the crew that changes were inevitable, I don't complain about all stolen goods and the new motivation of my crew, but it just…"

"It what?" I questioned with anticipation and now Gin looked at me, his piercing gaze gave a quiver down my spine.

"We attract far too much attention, we lost our notoriety and honestly we were careless and foolish for plundering the big ship that was supposed to bring some goods to Konoha. We've got the Kiri and Konoha village on our backs!"

I was shocked to hear this and realized myself that I was to blame for the whole problem, since I encouraged Gin and the crew to do more. There was a pause between us, the tension was evident.

"I didn't mean to let this happen. I had absolutely no intention to get all of us in trouble, I'm so sorry, I think I should leave before I attract another disaster." I apologized with the bitterness of my faults.

Then Gin placed his index finger underneath my chin and raised it, so that he looked at me in the eyes.

"Don't worry, it'll settle down after a moment, you'll see. Don't think about leaving, I've decided to take care of you as long as you stay in my crew and besides I don't think my men will protest if we decide to have a break from the plundering." He reassured me with a smile.

My heart melted at his face, his eyes were tender and his smile was to melt for. Unexpectedly his face approached mine and he kissed me. I sat there paralyzed from the surprise and he pulled back and he chuckled.

"I think anybody of the crew would love to be in my place."

I placed my fingers over my lips and I stared at Gin with surprise and confusion.

"Gin…"

He grinned at me.

"I thought by giving a kiss it would cheer you up, since you were so sad."

"Ah, okay." I nodded nervously and averted my gaze.

He was just cheering me up as a friend, although a kiss wasn't really appropriate in a friendship. There was a moment of silence and then Gin leaned back with a content sigh.

"Sorry that I surprised you, but lately I felt like kissing you." He mentioned calmly and cheerfully and as a response I spun my head to him, showing disbelief.

"There is something about you that attracts me a lot, I'm not so sure what exactly, but the least that I want to see is a sad Mizuno." He supplied with content.

I observed him, gradually revealing a grateful yet bitter smile. Gin sat back again and looked at me with a comforting face.

"Don't make such a face otherwise I'm obliged to kiss you again."

I didn't show any objection or whatsoever but simply looked at him. He cupped my cheeks and kissed me. He kissed me with such care and gentleness that my arms wrapped around his neck, giving him the reassurance that it was okay. I fell back into my pillow with him on top of me, kissing me still with that gentleness of his and growing into passion. Like a thunder bolt, Kakashi's face flashed in front of my eyes causing me to interrupt the kiss and turn my head away. Gin looked at me with confusion and dawning guilt of his actions.

"Gin, you are a friend and a handsome one at that, but I don't see us doing this."

"Then why haven't you rejected my kissing before?" he questioned me with earnest and with desperation I uttered.

"I don't know, I simply don't know! I'm confused!"

Gin pulled back and stood up in front of the bed, his back facing me.

"You have somebody you love, right?"

I didn't give him an answer, because he seems to know it anyway. Gin sighed and drove his fingers through his silver hair.

"What's sure I envy that person, he's go absolutely no idea what a special person you are."

"That's true; he has no idea since he doesn't love me." I corrected Gin with melancholy.

He eyed me.

"One sided-love, that's painful." He mumbled

"And the worst part is he toys around with me and ignores my feelings."

"Is he from Konoha?"

I nodded with a melancholic smile. With a sigh he said.

"Hopelessly in love. Anyway forget what just happened and I'll let you sleep."

When he was about to leave in such a haste, I grabbed a hold of his shirt and he eyed my hand than my face.

"Gin I have a favour to ask, can you…Can you hold me tonight?"

Gin was very surprised of my question that he took a moment to reflect. After some hesitation he climbed into my bed, wrapped an arm around me and pulled me closer to him. I covered ourselves with the blankets and snuggled against his chest.

"I'm sorry to cause so much trouble, I hope you don't mind."

"It's okay, just go to sleep." He reassured me with a calm voice that guaranteed me to go to sleep.

In a short time I fell into a deep and dreamless sleep.

The next morning I was abruptly awakened by the shouts that were calling me. One of the men stormed into my room and announced breathlessly and anxiously some news.

"Mizuno, we've captured a Konoha shinobi that was snooping around!"

Everything turned to stone. I met his gaze with disbelief and I began to imagine who it might be.

"I'll be down in a moment." I told the man and he inclined his head and left the room in a hurry.

I got fully dressed and put on a mask that covered my face but not my mouth region. The sea bandits treasured their identity and grew accustomed to wearing masks and well some didn't mind running around without one. It depended on what type of person you were the more open it was the stronger or bolder you were and mine was a combination because I wanted to keep my identity hidden from Konoha and other people that could recognize me. It was a simple plain white mask made of clay with two slits for the eyes. It had nothing special to it, but kept our identity secret and gave some protection. I tied my hair to a pony tail and with one deep breath I left the room.

The crew made such a racket. There was jeering, laughter and taunting and even some beating. I walked down the trail to the main and large part of the cavern. Down there I could see the crew encircling a person in which I couldn't identify. As I drew nearer to the group, the way was cleared for me to pass and to my horror I found Kakashi sitting on the floor with his hands bound behind his back and his face lowered hiding the bruises. Nearby stood Gin, observing with a mix of fascination and disbelief at Kakashi and yet behaving very proud. Encountering his double did give Gin a thorough shake and it also did to the crew. However it seemed that the men were amusing themselves by beating Kakashi a little and it ceased when they noticed my presence.

"What the hell is going on?" I demanded sternly and Gin spun around to me and came to me.

"This guy was snooping around on our island."

"Oh really?" I inquired with interest and smirked.

I went over to Kakashi kneeled down and took a firm hold of his chin with my hands. I turned his face around like studying his face.

"Well, well, who do we have here, the famous copy ninja Hatake Kakashi. What a surprise that you dropped into our place - I hope you enjoyed our hospitality?"

Everybody jeered and snickered. Kakashi was glaring at me with repugnance.

"He resembles you a lot Gin, is he maybe your relative?" I looked at Gin and he protested with disgust.

"Never! I hate the Konoha shinobis they killed most of my crew!"

"Let's see what you hide underneath that head gear of yours, shall we?" I fingered his head gear but he jumped ready to pounce me, but Gin kicked him in the stomach so that he sunk to his knees.

I gave a snicker at Kakashi's pathetic attempt to attack me.

"Those Konoha shinobis are so hot headed, no wonder they all get killed."

Kakashi raised his head revealing a glare and he snarled.

"You are the ones who will get killed if you don't let me go!"

The whole crew jeered with laughter.

"Oh, please Kakashi! Rumours say that you are cold, careful and deal ruthlessly with your opponents, well it seems those rumours were lies after all." I jeered at him and cleared my throat to change the atmosphere and I became very serious and I crossed my arms over my chest.

"Now tell me, why are you here? Did you come to steal our goods or on the behalf of Konoha?"

Kakashi gave a confident look.

"It's none of your business."

"Well it obviously is, since you were snooping around on our island, now ANSWER ME!" I raised my voice and Kakashi still kept his confident attitude.

"Do you seriously think I'll tell you, you bunch of trash? When I break free I'll make sure your gang's exterminated."

"Not until I KILLED YOU FIRST!" I roared and grabbed him by his collar.

I glanced at the crew and pointed out to three men.

"You three bring this trash to my quarter." I ordered to the three men and they came and brutishly took Kakashi with them.

The crew exchanged some anxious whispers but I didn't pay attention to that, instead when the three men reached my room and I still was down below, Gin came to me and guided me away from the crew.

"Mizuno, what are you doing? Isn't he the guy you fought with?" whispered Gin with a stern face.

I nodded.

"Who cares if he is?! I'll give you the information soon as I squeeze the information out of him." I whispered back with a smirk and left him.

In my room stood the three men, struggling to hold Kakashi any longer.

"Tie him there!" I ordered and the men forced Kakashi on the bed and tied his wrists onto a pole at the head of my bed.

Kakashi struggled fiercely and finally the muscular and rough man out of the three punched Kakashi in the guts so that he ceased struggling. He lay there hovering between consciousness and unconsciousness. The three men came to me.

"Do you wish anything else, Mizuno?"

"Yes, nobody should disturb us until I call."

The three men bowed and left the room. I watched as they left and smirked to myself I had Kakashi all for myself now. What should I do? Torture him or tell him it was me? The first option tempted me more and then I heard a groan.

"What do you want from me?" he spoke with drowsiness.

"Shouldn't I be asking you this? After all it's my crew that collected you in." I turned around and strode over to my bed, showing my wide smirk.

"I have nothing to say to you and you better release me before I kill you!"

I sniggered with amusement and sat down beside his lying figure.

"Kakashi, Kakashi. Don't underestimate us, only because we are outcasts or crooks, it long doesn't mean that we are weak, some of us are shinobis."

"Oh how great, the more fun the better!" he said with sarcasm and I sniggered.

I observed Kakashi's angry face and I wondered how he would react if he knew it was me. His face would surely be unique and not to mention he'll be strongly offended about what I was going to do to him. My sweet little revenge.

"How unfortunate that I've got to squeeze the information out of you, I was beginning to like you." I spoke with overconfidence and climbed on all fours over his body.

The discomfort was evident in Kakashi's face and he immediately reacted to it.

"What are you doing?" he demanded

My eyes met with his and I smirked.

"I'm going to take advantage of our time together, I hope you don't mind."

Kakashi looked even angrier and tried untying his wrists. I straddled his hips drawing his complete attention to me. I unzipped his jounin vest and opened it wide and with both of my hands I slid underneath his shirt coming in contact with his stomach. He hissed at me and angrily yanked his wrists and I sniggered at him.

"If you keep on being stubborn than you wouldn't have to put through with this."

Kakashi's grey eye brows arched down revealing a threatening glare, which didn't stop me from continuing. I drove my hands over his six packs and his chest, pushing his Prussian blue shirt up and at each time Kakashi struggled angrily, threatening with his glare and his snarls. It was strange yet amusing to see him like this, getting angry and anxious about me touching him. My hands caressed his body with such skill that it made him turn his head aside, shutting his eyes and biting his lips, judging from the creases of his face mask. His body was perfect to me, his slender and athletic torso felt so soft underneath my hands and it set on a blazing fire inside of me, raging on and urging me to continue. My heart hammered and I was short of breath.

"Are you going…to tell me, Kakashi? ...What are you here for?"

Kakashi shook his head and snarled once more. He was still holding strong like a bull.

"Okay, do as you want. I am anyway enjoying myself, it entices me to see you making that face." I breathed with seduction and descended, dropping my entire body on his naked torso.

His muscles became instantly rigid and I rested my head against his chest. His heart pounded so powerfully that it was amazing to me that his heart didn't burst out of his chest. My heart wasn't any better. I turned my head driving my lips over his chest and now he shuddered and had to contain an angry groan. I smirked against his chest.

"Men are so pathetically weak, you can easily break them." I breathed with overconfidence and cruelty against his chest.

His breaths were shorter and quicker and his body began to get hotter and sweatier. I was so fired on from this that passion enveloped me and I began showering Kakashi's torso with nibbles, kisses and licks. Kakashi's body quivered, arched and struggled to resist all of this, but he was slowly submitting to it. He kept on restraining groans and huffed loudly, fighting against his body. My face was sweating behind my mask, but under any circumstances I cannot remove this yet. My lips reached below his belly button and my hands began fingering the waist band of his pants and his legs began to jerk, interrupting me suddenly showing that it was enough.

I raised my head and found Kakashi, his face glistering with sweat and his face red, his exhausted eye looked at me, clearly pleading and giving up.

"Stop…I won't let you go any further…I won't let a person that I don't like touch me!" he protested weakly and panted.

I regained control over myself and observed him with a growing smirk. I crawled over his body so that were face to face.

"So you've got a sweet heart, how cute. What a pity I just marked you, that poor thing will be heart broken if she finds out - if you ever tell her that is." I taunted him with a snigger and he seemed prepared to bite me.

He showed still some resistance which revealed to me that he still wasn't going to say anything. I decided to put pressure on him. I grazed my cheeks against his and let my lips touch his ear.

"If you don't tell me your purpose here, I'll continue from where I stopped, if you know what I mean…" I breathed and rubbed my body against his.

His breath hitched and he spun his head away to contain himself.

"Okay! Okay! I'll tell you!" he gave in promptly with desperation.

I gave a triumphing snigger he was easier to break than expected. However the craving was still in my body and pressuring me to go on. I took a deep breath.

"Tell me, then." I ordered.

Kakashi was still panting and he tried pulling his mask down. I could imagine he was suffocating in that thing. I fingered his mask and pulled it down. His red face was entirely exposed now, giving my heart a start and my body a squirm. He looked over at me; his one eye looked at me in a hazy matter.

"I came to look for somebody and I thought she would be here…"

"There is more to it, tell me!"

"I've got my back covered, if, if I don't get back within 48 hours…a squad of Anbu will infiltrate your base and eliminate you."

I received a shock from this news and this was all going to happen if I still remain here and if Kakashi stays here too. Sooner or later I would have to reveal myself, but that should happen while we are far away. My attention was immediately drawn back to Kakashi, who tried again to struggle free and I answered to his first statement.

"I've seen the girl."

"Really? Is she alive, is she okay?" he spluttered with high awareness, concern and anxiety.

I kept a cool face, although inwardly I was moved that he was concerned about me, but I had to keep on acting a little longer.

"If you fought her than you should know that she's dead." I told him directly and Kakashi froze to a statue.

"Gin and I witnessed your fight. She was captured in a hurricane and on top of that struck by lightning. Give it up Kakashi, any individual dies when getting directly hit by lightning!"

"But her body…" he spoke absently and I reinforced my tone.

"She was roasted alive and fell into the ocean, either it's at the bottom of the ocean or burned up."

Kakashi lay there staring blankly and absently through me, he was overcome by shock and trauma and it nearly made me want to tell him my existence, but I had to restrain myself for a little longer. He was in such a pitiful state that I was on the verge to cry.

"But why…do I feel…that she's so close?" he mumbled absently.

I'm here damn it! You are looking at me, it's me! I bit my trembling lip on the verge to shout at him, but I felt the zapping of electricity between my fingers. Since I arrived at the sea bandits I discovered a new ability, I could manipulate electricity and it was thanks to that lightning that I've gained this ability. With fascination I observed it and it calmed me down again. A smirk crept over my face and I focused my attention on Kakashi.

"Anyway who cares if she's dead." I mentioned and my hand caressed his face.

His attention was back on me, I approached his face.

"You've got no idea how irresistible you are, I don't know if I'll be able to stop..." I whispered this time overcome by my true own feelings.

Before Kakashi could say another word, I crushed my lips on his. I missed Kakashi's lips so much; I even forgot their taste and the smoothness. I held his face gently and kissed him with such passion and desperation like my life depended on it. Kakashi was still unable to react; he seemed to be startled by my action. My feelings were simply running free, I had no will power to hold back, and now that I have him in my grasp I won't let him go. My tongue lashed over his lips and instantly I plunged my tongue in his mouth. The sudden presence of my tongue in his mouth caused him to flip out and he tried yanking his head away, but I held his head firmly in my palms. I never felt so hungry for him, so hungry to taste him and feel him quiver. My tongue explored the inside of his mouth, our saliva mingled and I could taste his and it sent an exciting shiver down my spine.

The warmth in my body grew and grew. I just realized how much I missed him and how much I truly loved him. I started becoming more urgent and our tongues competed with each other. I felt all exposed to Kakashi; my feelings were simply rushing and rushing, pressuring him with my tongue lashes and devouring his lips with an intoxicating passion. I didn't want any of this, but how could I contain such a strong feeling that screams for its release? Kakashi stopped resisting any longer and calmed down. I stopped kissing and pulled back, a thread of saliva hung between our tongues. With my tongue I licked my lips clean, savouring the taste. Kakashi looked so stunned by the whole thing; there was something about his eye that told me it was a bad sign. His tongue drove slowly over his lips like trying to recognize the taste, while he stared at me his eyes hazy with something piercing which gave my heart a squeeze.

All of a sudden Kakashi caught back his awareness and in seconds I was underneath him face to face, his hands placed on either side of my head.

"Sara…Is it really you?" he uttered with disbelief mixed with relief and excitement.

My heart gave a start. Oh no! Did he recognize me? This is bad! I cannot show myself to him yet! I was moved to see how desperate Kakashi turned out to be, it looked like he was to cry in relief. It seemed like a heavy burden was lifted from his shoulders and he simply couldn't believe that it was maybe me. His hands were free now and they were ready to take off my mask, not until I waved a threatening hand at him.

"If you touch my mask, you'll regret it." I threatened him and his eye fell on my hand where electricity zapped between my fingers.

He simply looked at it and didn't move, it was like he was disturbed by it and he appeared still absent. Defensively I charged my hands with electricity and zapped Kakashi. He gave out a yell and was thrown off of my bed. I sat up alarmingly and checked where he was. He was sprawled on his back, but with struggle he sat up again.

"I am not, Sara or whatever her name is! I'm Mizuno!" I barked and I had to swallow the stings in my heart.

I'm sorry Kakashi, but I need to lie. I don't have the courage to show myself after what just happened. I know from the very beginning that I can't be with you and it's the best way for us if you believe I am dead. I cannot live here, I am not from here! We are forbidden to love each other because I know that by the end we'll have to go our separate ways, you in the Naruto world and I in my world. Kakashi sat there with his head hanging low, his face was barely visible.

"Of course you are not her. She doesn't possess any ability with electricity nor is she cruel and sneaky… I must have lost my mind hallucinating for one second that you were her… She really is dead." he spoke with melancholy and he looked at his palms.

"And I killed her…" he added his voice sounding absent and traumatized, his palms trembled.

I couldn't believe what I was witnessing, tears were actually splashing into his palm and he put his mask back on to cover himself. He buried his face in his palms and was seriously sobbing. I stared with disbelief and confusion that I just observed him. He looked so vulnerable and delicate that it gave me the extreme urge to comfort him and tell him I was here. Under his heavy sobs, he uttered pieces of words:

"I killed her…I…her…I'm such a fool…why did I…"

My eyes began to prickle and angrily and abruptly I cried for Gin. After a moment he ran in with some of his men, ready to defend me but I pointed to Kakashi.

"Take that pathetic wimp away and lock him up in the darkest place of the cavern!" I ordered them and they obeyed without hesitation.

Gin walked over to Kakashi, forcefully pulled him up by his arms and took Kakashi's wrists and bound them behind his back again. Several men held Kakashi and shoved him out of my room. Gin followed them until they were out of the room. I stared at the vulnerable creature disappearing behind the rocks and being locked up. Kakashi was so shaken by his guilt of killing me, but why? Wasn't I just giving him a pain always? I don't understand I am confused. Gin spoke to me with his back directed to me.

"Well, whatever torture you used, you actually made him cry…Hey what's wrong?" Gin turned back to me and saw me, my frame shook and the tears were pressing in my eyes and I burst. The tears streamed down my face without ceasing and I sobbed so strongly that I hiccoughed. Gin instantly ran over and scooped me in his arms. I didn't care what he was doing but I desperately needed a shoulder to cry on. I was angry over myself that I had made him so depressed to the point that he even cried. To make a man cry is the biggest crime on earth that I have ever committed and especially if it was a lie. I was frustrated over everything, my actions before hand, why I deserted Kakashi and Konoha entirely and why in the hell I joined this gang?! Now I just realized what grave mistake I've committed and that means if Kakashi finds out he will never forgive me again. Why must I conceal my feelings? Why must I hurt him so much? He hasn't done me wrong! I can barely see the wrong he did to me, because I love him so much and automatically forgive him. Why, why? Why all this tearing pain in my heart gets worse the more I hurt him and the more distant I become? Why can't we be together, tell me why?


	36. Chapter 35

**Here goes anotha chapie^^ Hope you guys enjoy^^ Please R&R, thankies^^**

* * *

**CHAPTER THIRTY FIVE**

- Renunciation, betrayal and a sudden confession -

The next day, Kakashi's deadline was approaching with fatal steps. Over night I thought about some options and concluded with one. I need to leave the crew and take Kakashi with me.

I discussed with Gin about the things Kakashi told me and it was written all over his face that he wanted to avoid any confrontation whatsoever with any shinobi countries. It was the first time in four weeks that I've witnessed such an anxious face and it told me it was best for me to leave before I lead the entire crew to its grave. The decision was difficult; I grew very attached to this crew. I could for once act normally without fearing to be rejected or sent to prison. It was a month of bliss, although their negative influence was passed on to me and not to forget their habits as well. However I was grateful that they could teach me to perceive people's intentions and execute in the right second an action that could either overthrow the person or play along.

I slowly began to realize that my presence in the Naruto world was the sole purpose for my development, to become stronger and see the world in another light.

Anyway enough with the reminiscing or with the contemplation, I still had to finish up some business before leaving this world and first of all it was to leave the gang and bring Kakashi away from here. However things turn out to be worse than expected.

When I went to look for Kakashi in the place where he was supposed to be tied up, I found the shackles on the floor and Kakashi gone. I shouted on top of my lungs, demanding for the whereabouts of the prisoner. Nearly half of the crew ran down at my command.

"Where is the prisoner!" I demanded with impatience and growing anger.

The crew exchanged anxious looks, either fearing to answer or hoping that a miracle would happen that could spare them. I eyed them threateningly and I raised my hand revealing the electricity zapping in my hand.

"Tell me, or I'll roast you all." I glowered ferociously and the crew recoiled fearfully and pushed one guy forth to answer the question.

The guy looked at his companion with a face of I-thought-you-were-my-friends and looked back at me nervously.

"Mizuno Sama, don't get angry at us, but, Gin Sama, he uhm, well he took the prisoner."

"WHAT?!"

Scared by my outburst he continued with an anxious and alarmed voice.

"He made us swear not to tell you anything-

-For what?!" I demanded, interrupting him sharply and the guy who shivered at my ferociousness, continued.

"He took the prisoner outside to-to-to, Uhm, like he said to "play around with"."

I couldn't believe what I heard and I rushed passed them with a groan. I dashed up the path arriving to the main room of the cavern and turned sharply to the exit of the cave. I burst out into the blazing sun and on to the creaking jagged rocks that were mercilessly battered by the waves. I hopped onto each sharp boulder, climbing my way up to solid and smooth ground. When I arrived there into lush vegetation, I spotted a great distance away Gin and Kakashi on the calm ocean surface ready to confront each other, however Kakashi appeared still shaken and he had one knee resting on the surface. Gin appeared firm and ready to battle. I didn't know that Gin could float on water. I got up and marched boldly and furiously to the ocean. I was ready to shout, but contained it when I saw Gin talking and Kakashi not reacting to it.

All of a sudden I saw Gin executing a technique with his fingers and instantly I recognized it was a water technique. Kakashi stared down into the ocean, ignorant of what Gin was doing. Water started to collect in the air in front of Gin; it grew and grew shaping itself into a gigantic cube. I feared the outcome of the technique, because Gin required a lot of chakara and skill to shape it into a geometrical figure.

Furiously and desperately I vanished from my spot, praying for the water to help me. The enormous cube hovered higher and levitated over Kakashi, casting down a big squared shadow. Regardless of that Kakashi did not budge; he kneeled there waiting to be butchered.

The cube dropped and with a loud boom of an explosion, the cube clashed against something that sounded harder than steal. The cube gradually dissolved letting the water cascade like strong heavy rain on this unfamiliar and foreign thing. A force field made of water capsulated Kakashi, while I stood firmly with my hands raised above my head holding and controlling that force field. Kakashi reacted by spilling out a disbelieved "huh?"

"You are dishonouring your name! You have tainted your title as one of the strongest shinobis of Konoha! Do you think a proud Konoha shinobi would let himself get killed by someone who's weaker than him?!" I scolded Kakashi without paying attention to him and keeping the force field up.

"I don't care about anything anymore. I am a disgrace; death seems to be the only solution to redeem my mistake." He uttered melancholically and I scoffed with absurdity at his statement.

"What the hell are you babbling about? Do you think that girl would be happy to hear this? Do you think she would be happy to see you acting like a wimp and sacrificing yourself to your enemy?" I scolded him sharply, but he reacted back equally angry.

"You don't understand, because you don't know anything! I've killed an innocent and caring woman, who was the ONLY person that I cared about!"

My heart squeezed with a start, trapping my voice and the oxygen. It startled me so much what he said about me and I remained disbelieved. I wanted to jump into his arms, hug him and kiss him and tell him I was here. I bit my trembling lip to contain myself, I couldn't do this, and I must focus! I lowered my head, smiling melancholy to myself.

"I also lost someone…" I uttered and I could feel that Kakashi was calming himself down, "I can tell you, if I had taken my life only because of him, he would have cursed me in the life after that anyway…You have to go on with your life and die according to the law of nature or after a fulfil life."

Kakashi was silent but I could feel his stare on me, I just hoped he didn't find out it was me. Then I took a determined air and told him.

"I'll help you escape without risking us to resort into a battle."

I lowered my arms and the force field lowered itself at the same time. Gin met me with surprised and a disbelieved face. He knew I could manipulate electricity but not water.

"Mizuno what's going on and why can you-

-manipulate water?" I finished his sentence for him and let the water carry me over to Gin.

He watched me with disbelief that he could barely speak. I stopped when I was close enough to him.

"It's a skill that I kept secret from you because I was insecure how to use it. What were you doing with the prisoner?!" I told him with a serious tone.

"I wanted to get rid of him so that my crew is spared from the Anbu's." he declared and I shook my head with absurdity.

"Do you think by killing him, it will solve the problem? On the contrary it'll make it worse! Hatake Kakashi is renowned for being a top elite shinobi, if he gets killed HERE whole Konoha will be on our back and do you want that?"

Gin realized his mistake and expressed some frustration with a groan.

"What should we do then?" he exclaimed with desperation and infuriation.

I gave Gin a defeated smile.

"I'll take care of it. You just go back to our crew and stay hidden."

"What? What do you mean, Mi..!"

I abruptly hugged him and he instantly became silent and I whispered so that Kakashi couldn't hear.

"Gin, they are looking for me and if I leave I can draw their attention away from the crew and you."

"You are giving yourself to THEM?!" he protested with disaccord, but I silenced him once again by placing my fingers on his lips.

"Please, don't make it difficult for me. It's the best that I leave; anyway they are looking for me and not for you and your crew. Hide yourselves well and keep quiet for several days."

"I refuse to let you do this!" he protested and removed my hand and held it carefully.

"Please, Gin, it's the only way, you have to let me go." I pleaded in a whisper.

He searched in my eyes to check if I was lying or not being serious. He gave in with a hopeless sigh and removed my arms and turned his back on me.

"Go ahead, leave before I change my mind." He said in a firm voice.

"Gin…Thank you for every thing." I expressed my gratitude with sincerity and turned away from him and walked back to Kakashi, who was back on his feet again appearing less troubled than before.

"Stay close and don't move." I told Kakashi and turned my back.

The water began to tremble and become wild under our feet. I focused my chakara unto my soles, letting it spread and graft into the water. In a brusque lurch, a disk of water lifted from the ocean and floated higher and higher in the sky.

"Whatever you do, keep the chakara continuously circulating in your soles otherwise you'll drop through and well, I won't be able to save you." I warned Kakashi who was so surprised by the whole thing that he didn't utter a word.

The place that I scooped out the water filled itself with a crash and I hovered with a disk shaped piece of water underneath my feet. Gin had turned around observed this with fascination.

"Gin, take care of the crew and I swear on all your heads and on the sea bandit code that I won't betray you. If you don't believe me wait for several days and if you weren't attacked by than, that is the proof of my loyalty." I pledged with earnest to Gin and he gave me an amused smirk.

"And you take good care of yourself and do what you feel is right."

I nodded with determination and waved at him.

"Farewell Gin, thank you for everything." I said and gave a last grateful glance at him and flew away.

It was the last time that I ever was going to see him. This man will remain forever in my heart as one of my closest friends and great older brother.

"Where are you heading?" I asked Kakashi.

"To Konoha, this way, to the North." He pointed with his arm and I nodded.

"Good, now hold on to me, it's going to be a bumpy ride." I told him and he placed his hands on my waist and moved a bit closer behind me.

I felt he was ready and without further a due we soared through the sky, over the sparkling blue ocean. Kakashi was torn back by the sudden impact that he reflexively clung his arms around my waist. I had to smile to myself and I steered this thing like a floating surf board.

"You have to give me the directions where to go, okay?" I called over the loud and rushing sound back to Kakashi.

"Okay, I will." He shouted back.

We kept soaring and soaring higher until we crossed the ocean and were flying over the forest. The wind was on our side helping us to go further and further.

The trip took an hour long until I started feeling the side effects. We came to a sudden halt when I dropped to my knees, Kakashi instantly checked if I was alright.

"Are you okay?"

I panted heavily feeling worn out from using so much chakara.

"Damn it, it uses so much chakara!" I cursed through clenched teeth and I could see the water dripping from my disk and the layer was becoming thinner and thinner.

"You should drop me off somewhere…Ah over there!" he indicated and I spotted an open space.

I bit my lip and persevered, moving us over the trees and lowering us down into an open space in the middle of the forest. I brought us down gently depositing us on the forest ground. It was a grassy field which led to another dense forest. I recognized it instantly.

It was the typical Konoha forest; I didn't expect that we would already be here. I released a breath of relief after finding solid ground. Kakashi came over and rested his hand on my shoulder.

"You didn't have to do that, but thanks anyway." He thanked me kindly and I responded calmly.

"It was a pleasure."

I did some breathing exercise to regain my energy and Kakashi still had his hand resting on my shoulder and he kneeled down to me, showing concern.

"Are you sure you are okay?"

"Yea, yea, I just need to rest a bit; after all such a jutsu takes up so much chakara." I reassured him calmly.

"I guess this ability is hereditary, right?" supposed Kakashi and I nodded without responding.

There was a moment of silence and then I got up and walked some steps forward and stopped.

"I gotta go, need to visit an old friend of mine."

"In Konoha?"

I simply nodded at his assumption.

"If I don't show any signs that I survived, he surely will keep on grieving about me and I don't think my heart would be able to bear this any longer." I told Kakashi with regret and melancholy.

"I realized he gets angry over my carelessness and stubbornness, but I was just too stupid and blind to realize that he does care about me. And yet I manage to hurt him even more through lying and pretences, what a great person I am… Even though he taught me so much - he must think that I never grasped his words. If he knew how much I cherished his words, I'm sure we wouldn't be in such bad terms."

I raised my hand to my mask, grasped it and threw it on the ground so that it shattered into pieces.

"I hope he can still forgive me, for all my foolishness, indifference and ignorance that made his life so difficult. I never meant to hurt him, when… He's such an important person to me."

There was a brief pause, I didn't know how Kakashi was reacting to this or whether he was listening, but it was time to show myself to him. Even if he'll hate me, I have to confront the truth no matter how much it hurts.

I pulled out the elastic that tied my hair and I turned around and a gust of wind blew my blond locks in my face. With an affectionate smile, I encountered Kakashi.

"Long time no see, Kakashi." I greeted him with warmth and with my fingers pushing some hair behind my ears.

Kakashi stood there, staring wide-eyed with disbelief like he was seeing a ghost. The gust of wind that rustled the leaves deafened any other sound produced around us. He raised his trembling hands and treaded heavily towards me, he was in state of confusion, uncertain if I was a mere illusion. He stopped in front of me; he raised his trembling hands hesitatingly and cupped my cheeks.

His thumbs brushed over my cheeks, nose and lips to check if I was real. His uncovered eye sparkled, overcome by emotions and he engulfed me in an overwhelming embrace with his one hand driving through my hair and his emotional voice cracking:

"You are still alive, thank God, thank God!" he whispered with immense relief with an emotional tangled voice.

He held me so tightly, determined not to let me go ever again. I was so moved by his reaction that tears were brimming in my eyes. My arms crept over his broad back and I returned the hug, equally overwhelmed. I closed my eyes to bathe in this moment of bliss. It was like the time had stopped for us, nothing in the world could separate us now.

However he pulled brusquely away revealing an indifferent expression that gave my body an icy shiver and made my heart sink to my stomach. I sensed that something terrible was going to happen. He backed away from me and all of a sudden I was surrounded by an Anbu squad, which pointed their kunais menacingly at me. One Anbu appeared in front of Kakashi, who seemed to be the leader.

"Well done Kakashi sempai, she survived after all, Hokage Sama will be pleased."

I listened to this with horror.

"Huh?! Kakashi what does he mean?" I demanded, but my wrists were brutally forced against my back to shut me up and I gave out a painfully gasp.

Kakashi didn't pay attention to me anymore, instead he directed the leader of the Anbu further away from us to discuss about something. Dread flooded my entire system, what was going on, what's the meaning of this?! There was a brief discussion between Kakashi and the captain of the Anbu squad. I couldn't hear a word they said but finally they came back to us. The captain announced:

"This girl is a threat; we must bring her back to Konoha alive. Do you understand?"

"Yes, sir!" all shouted in unison and were in motion, but I shouted.

"Wait! Kakashi! What's the meaning of this?"

Regardless of my demands they motioned themselves into the direction in which they were heading to, but all of a sudden a shout came from Kakashi.

"Wait!"

The Anbus halted and Kakashi walked over in front of me, his hands were in his pockets and he looked at me with his cold eyes and indifferent attitude.

"I think I owe you an explanation, which I am willing to give anyway. From here on you are considered as an escaped captive and walking threat to the shinobi society."

"But why? I didn't do any harm? I just accomplished the mission as ordered!"

Kakashi huffed with ridicule.

"All of this, my personal training with you, was just an experiment to see whether or not you were a threat. Considering the fact of your possession of a demon and manipulation of water, electricity and your ability to heal and your flight to seek refuge in the sea bandit gang, you do pose a threat to Konoha, which means you need to be locked away."

"What? But since when was I-

-A captive? Well Sara, didn't you know that since the very beginning? My second mission underneath training you was to report to Tsunade anything suspicious about you and let me tell you I found a lot, enough to prove that you are a threat and even a spy."

"But damn it, I am not a spy! Didn't I prove to y'all that I wasn't! I wiped out the entire Fuhei clan and destroyed the demon, doesn't it prove my loyalty to Konoha?!"

Kakashi shook his head, still keeping his cold face.

"Like I told you, it was only an experiment to see whether or not you were a threat. Do you think Konoha is stupid enough to let in a foreigner that denies its identity and origin and lets that individual train and live freely in our village? Of course not! Konoha launches a full scale espionage against foreigners that's why we have limited foreigners in our village."

"Kakashi, that's unjustified! You have many proofs that contradict those beliefs, why don't you tell them!"

Kakashi took a deep breath and eyed me sharply.

"I only care about what I witness nothing else."

I couldn't believe any of this, it must be wrong, it must be a lie! Than what were all the nice moments... Pictures flashed in my mind where we laughed and talked, embraced, kissed and when were so close to each other. All of the memories cracked as if somebody kept on smashing against a thin surface.

"So, all of this...Was a lie?" I uttered hurtfully and stared at Kakashi.

"It's part of the job. In order to get some information, I needed to act."

I breathed quickly overwhelmed by this unbearable reality.

"It's not true! It's not true! YOU LIAR!! ALL THESE MOMENTS WERE REAL, I KNOW THEY WERE!" I bellowed with such anguish that the tears spilled down my cheeks and I struggled to break free from the Anbus.

Kakashi scoffed.

"Have you forgotten? We are shinobis, trained to deceive enemies and capture them. Haven't you learned that from your mission, Sara? When you acted as Ronen's bride- to-be?"

The memory of Ronen stabbed me in the heart; I bit my trembling lip remembering the pain and bitterness from the event.

"You are so naïve and weak minded in believing that Konoha would actually accept you and train you. How could they accept you, if you aren't a shinobi and more precisely a foreigner from a distant world?" He jeered and turned his back on me.

"Take her away." He ordered.

It was like being rammed by a knife. The cracks, shattered and showered over the floor, leaving me in the dark, feeling shamefully bare and dreadfully alone and horribly misused. The reality was too much to bear, everything was a lie and I was once again misused and abandoned in the darkness. Kakashi betrayed me…Kakashi betrayed me…Kakashi betrayed me…KAKASHI BETRAYED ME AND HANDED ME OVER TO THE KONOHA GOVERNMENT!

Overwhelmed by these emotions, the electricity zapped around my body and I released a strong voltage, propelling the Anbus away. I didn't care the slightest what I did, it was my last chance, and I must tell him before it's too late! I ran to him and clasped my arms around his stomach, embracing him tightly from behind. I sobbed in the back of his vest, gripping the front of his vest with trembling hands.

"I must tell you…My heart cannot bear it any longer! I've been trying to hide it and tried lying to myself that it wasn't true, but at every second of the day those feelings grow stronger that it hurts…"

I bit my lip to stop myself from sobbing so much, my feelings were pulsing through me and the words just burst out of my mouth.

"Hatake Kakashi! I love you! I loved you since the very beginning!" I confessed with such clarity and power that it echoed over the forest and stunned any noise that surrounded us.

I finally said it, after holding it secret and letting it grow and grow to becoming painful, it was finally out!

Kakashi was completely silent and was frozen stiff. I was too distraught to identify his mood only that his silent behaviour seemed to be giving me some hope. However I was deceived, when he responded abruptly:

"That's cute, but I feel the exact opposite for you, you were just a burden since the beginning!"

I froze stiff and my arms dropped down my sides, even more tears sprung from my eyes and I stared blankly with shock in front of me. His words rung in my ears, burdening me as the seconds passed and the tone of his voice stabbed my heart.

"You wasted enough time already, I'll end this." He mentioned and vanished in front of my eyes and reappeared behind me.

Too overwhelmed by my emotions, he struck me in the back of my neck and I fell back against him, losing my sense of balance and with my senses numbing and fading. I felt a last powerful gust of wind, blowing over us, created a moment between us two and Kakashi's voice whispered in my ear.

"Thank you, Sara." His voice was gentle and fading and before I could distinguish any further, I fell deeper and deeper into the cold and dark bottomless abyss of unconsciousness.


	37. Chapter 36

**HEYA!!!!!!^^ THANKIES FOR REVIEWS AND HERE YOU GET A CHAPTER^^ HOPE YOU ENJOY AND THANKS FOR R&R ALL THIS TIME AND I'D BE HAPPY IF YOU'ALL CONTINUED LIKE THAT^^

* * *

CHAPTER THIRTY SIX**

- The capture and futile means of interrogation -

I woke up, feeling drowsy and groggy from my uncomfortable sleep. My back was in such pain and my neck as well; I wanted to stretch myself but became instantly aware of my wrists being bound by a plastic cord. I tried to pull my hands out of it, but it was in vain. I rocked back and forth on the uncomfortable plastic chair I sat on, but as a result I crashed to the floor, smacking my shoulder and head against the solid floor.

Now I took in the room. It was plain, squared, crammed and ugly, which had one table and three chairs altogether. One beside the door, the one I sat on and the other across the table. I couldn't move a muscle, even my legs were bound to the legs of the chair. I tried using my electricity ability, however was shockingly aware that something was absorbing my chakara.

"It's no use." The door creaked open revealing a tall, cloaked and menacing looking shinobi.

He wore his head gear like a scarf tied around his head, covering his scalp and two long scars stretched diagonally down his face, looking like he was scratched by a bear. Oh no, not him, anything but him! I groaned to myself. Not Morino Ibiki! He noticed me on the floor and walked over to me, his piercing cold eyes scanning me analytically.

"The plastic cords are chakara absorbent, so any attacks you are planning to do will be futile."

Without difficult he set my chair back in place. He walked over to the chair across the table and sat down. A folder was on the table and he skimmed through it, then he stopped still on one paper reading it carefully.

"So you are Hanshin Sara, 18 years old and origins unknown." He read without looking at me and continued reciting:

"Shows incredible knowledge about Konoha and familiarity with shinobi lifestyle, fighting, weapons, locations, citizens and details from criminals from the Bingo book, even though not raised or born in Konoha or any shinobi related country." He finished and leaned back against his chair and observed me intently.

I lowered my gaze and focused on a scratch on the floor. He won't get any information out of me, although I know he's a professional interrogator. He released a breath and took off his coat so that this typical grey and dull looking examiner clothes were exposed.

"I'm Morino Ibiki, your interrogator and for today we'll take it easy. So, can I get you something to eat or drink?"

I didn't give an answer and kept my gaze fixed to the scratch on the floor. There was a brief pause.

"I believe that is a no." he assumed and the rustling of papers filled the silence of this cluster phobic room.

"I think we should start at the beginning, tell me something about yourself."

Which means in other words, "tell me about your origins" and "tell me of your oh-my-god-so-dangerous abilities" and "your knowledge of the Naruto World". Who do they think they are? I'm not that stupid to know what's going on, watching movies of crimes cases and all that does give you a deep insight of what methods the interrogators use. I scoffed.

"Step one get acquainted with the captive by either proposing beverages or food or winning their favours or spurring some interests, step two continue until you feel the captive feels at ease with you, step three ask personal questions, step four begin with disguised questions, step five appear strict and threatening so that the captive knows who's boss and finally step six begin with the interrogation."

"Well, Kakashi's description of your intelligence is correct, it's impossible to hide anything from you."

The name "Kakashi" rung in my ears and caused such revulsion in my stomach that I raised my head and gave him a firm face.

"I'm only going to tell you this once and you can report that to Tsunade. You are wasting precious time with me and not to mention interrogating the wrong person that has absolutely no connection whatsoever to Orochimaru and Akatsuki! If you don't believe me than question yourself why, if I had been part of any of them, why haven't I attacked Konoha or killed at least Kakashi? Hey and not to forget I did come back to Konoha, even if I knew I was going to be sentenced to jail for taking flight and living in a pirate gang, still, I came back! Do you think a servant from Orochimaru or a buddy from Akatsuki would be retarded enough to go back to Konoha?! And if you believe that I stole some valuable or top secret scrolls or whatsoever, turn Kakashi's flat upside down and go through my stuff I've got nothing to hide!" I declared with a strict voice and continued.

"That asshole that filled out this report is a liar and has no proof whatsoever to make me guilty! Fine, if you wanna now about my abilities, I'll tell you straight! I-don't-know-how-I-got-them! I don't know where the hell I got the demon from! All I can say is that my demon has become tremendously weak from my mission of destroying the scroll, weak that even a freaking baby could manipulate it! Yes, I admit that the demon was the source of my abnormal abilities, which I don't understand why you consider this as a threat even when your village has many freaks with similar issues!"

"Even if I may come from a far distant world, we respect individual rights and don't oppress them simply because they are from another nationality, country or race! We don't make such a theatre with exaggerating persecution and senseless interrogations! I am not a criminal damn it, I am innocent, I have an alibi! Is it so difficult for you shinobis to understand this or is it just a habit of shinobi nations to incarcerate and than question later!"

I panted from my outburst; I was so frustrated by everything. This interrogation was the biggest bullshit ever, it was meaningless and the worst part was I felt helpless and believed that all of my talking was ignored and disregarded. The tears began to prickle in my eyes and I lowered my face. The pain was too much and the tears sprung out of my eyes, I was desperate and frustrated.

"Words have no meaning here, what only matters are what you witnessed with your eyes. Reasons have no meaning…I wouldn't hurt or destroy a place or a person that I cherish…"

Then I broke out in sobs, while uttering with a clogged and trembling voice.

"I'm too weak to be a shinobi I'm haunted by the Fuhei people I've massacred, every time when I go to sleep or close my eyes I feel them looming over me prepared to kill me, I can hear them cursing, I can see their anguished and blood stained faces screaming and shrieking! Please, just let me go! I wanna go home, back to family and my normal life, why can't you understand this?"

I couldn't speak any further my sobs became so heavy, it was like all the feelings that were piling up, poured out like a storming rainy day. I was so absorbed by my grief that I lost track of my surroundings and anything. Only when I heard the door close in a creak, I knew I was left alone with my sorrow.

* * *

I don't know how long I sat there crying by myself or dozing on the chair, but I couldn't shake off this feeling of being watched. Whispers haunted me like a pack of taunting ghosts. I never felt so depressed and alone in my whole life. How pathetic I was to believe that I could be accepted in Konoha! No matter where I run off to, everybody will treat me as the pest. I can understand now how much Naruto endured, at least I was fortunate enough to have a family that cared about me…But is that really the case? What if they forgotten me? In the end I had no clue how long I was gone from the real world, was it only seconds, minutes or worse days, weeks or months? The very thought of it gave me a chill, it might be that even now they may be looking for me, maybe I'll be on the list of kidnapped victims!!

I was growing anxious as the seconds passed and ultimately I began to move my legs and wrists hopeful that it would loosen up. And unbelievably it did work! I recalled Ibiki saying that it absorbed chakara but not human strength. I never had been physically strong, however landing into the Naruto world my physical strength quadrupled! Yes, my wrists were free now followed by my legs, I undid the cord and finally I was off of the chair. My body ached from sitting so uncomfortably and was weakened by the lack of food and water. I turned back to my chair and summoned a shadow clone; I made it sit and bound those cords around its ankles and wrists. I gave the clone some clear instructions that under no circumstance should it react or speak; it should pretend to be traumatized and depressed. I transformed into the first person that came to my mind and opened the door and stepped out. Just beside the door sat a shinobi on a stool dozing off, I closed the door and he woke up abruptly, leaping from his stool and looking alarmed as he noticed me.

"Ah! Iruka? What are you doing here? I thought only Jounin's and Hokage Sama could see the captive?"

I looked at the guy, praying that I could act Iruka well.

"Hokage sama permitted me to interrogate the captive, since she knows I have close relations to her."

"Really? I thought Kakashi sempai was closer to her?"

"Well technically he is, but you know after getting tricked by Kakashi sempai it was a heavy blow on her and she doesn't talk to anybody anymore."

The shinobi was easily to deceive than I thought; I could feel he was already convinced.

"Did you get any thing out of her?" he asked with anticipation and I sighed while hopelessly shaking my head.

"She literally stopped talking or even reacting, have a look." I directed the guy and opened the door, revealing my clone sitting on the chair with its head lowered and resting immobile.

"What a pitiful sight, isn't it?" I supposed and closed the door.

The shinobi went back to his stool.

"Did Hokage sama plan to do something, about the detainee?"

The shinobi shook his head.

"I didn't hear anything, I'm only aware that tomorrow they'll judge whether or not the girl will go to prison."

It made me twitch, gosh those people were nuts! If they put me in jail only because I was special than I might as well run away now!

"Just out of curiosity, since I'm fresh to this entire thing, how long has she been held here?"

The shinobi gave a thought and scratched his unshaven chin.

"It's been I believe, 48 hours, yes 48 hours."

My God! No wonder I was dehydrated and famished! Those idiots kept me without feeding me! Will it be useful for them that I die of hunger or what?!

"Thanks again, I'll leave now, have to write a report to Hokage Sama, see you another time." I said while walking off with my hand raised to say bye bye.

The shinobi bade me good night and nothing more. Quietly, alarmingly and discretely I made my way through the dimly, dull and prolonging corridor. The moonlight shone through the windows, giving a creepy and threatening atmosphere. I felt like at each moment something would leap out of the shadow and attack me. The crimson carpet and the plain wall lost its vitality and beauty in the dark, giving off the impression of a ruined corridor. With pounding hearts beats and goose bumps creeping over my skin, I anxiously searched for the exit, but didn't see one. Finally a great deal of moonlight spilled over the carpet up ahead indicating a door way, freedom was up ahead!

However my hopes were extinguished, when a damn familiar voice behind me called for Iruka. A shrill went down my spine; I recognized that voice even if I would be blind!

"Yo Iruka." Called that person casually.

With a rigid body I turned my head and replied mechanically.

"Yes, what is it, Kakashi?"

The figure approached in calm strides with his hands in his pockets, his silver hair glinting in the moonlight his gaze fixed on me with his figure appearing in the gleam of the moonlight and disappearing in the shadow of the corridor the next. It was great misfortune to meet that guy, why the heck was I cursed with all misfortunes around this guy? He merely attracted bad luck! No matter how much I hate this guy, I need to use all my intelligence to get out of this and even resort to violence if it goes wrong. The problem was I got a new habit now, not to look in anybody's eyes or especially away from his eyes. On one hand I was terribly afraid and on the other extremely angry, how am I supposed to act like "Iruka" in front of that guy? What am I going to do?!

SARA!!! Get a grip of yourself, if you behave nervous and stiff around him, he'll suspect something! Just keep cool! Kakashi stood across of me.

"Iruka, what are you doing up so late, aren't you supposed to teach tomorrow?"

"Of course, but I had some business to take care of."

-Really? By having a little chat with the detainee?" he inquired promptly, giving me no chance to actually digress from the subject.

"Yes, well I did and what we discussed it none of your concern."

"In fact it is my concern, since I am responsible for the detainee." He said and stepped up to be under the full gleam of the moonlight.

If only I could get him off my hook, but how?

"Hokage Sama gave me the permission to keep this confidential; anyway by tomorrow afternoon I have to hand in the report, so if you excuse me I have to go home to do my work." I told him with impatience and ended my sentence by turning my back on him and slowly moving to the door way.

As I walked towards the door way I heard his chortle and just hoped he wasn't going to stop me, however I was terribly wrong.

Within seconds I was rammed against the wall, with his forearm pressed against my throat and his other hand pointing a sharp kunai menacingly at my face.

"Hey! hey! Kakashi? What's going on?!" I protested yet Kakashi kept a confident face and he chuckled.

"You repeat your mistakes and as usual you underestimate me."

"What are you talking about Kakashi? It's me Iruka!" I stressed him but he still kept his confidence.

Then he brushed the cold blade over my cheek so that I recoiled from its temperature and quivered. Kakashi's head hovered next to mine.

"I know it's you, Sara. I'm the only person in Konoha who knows your level of chakara and can predict your moves… It's no use to escape." He whispered calmly with indifference.

"So it was you, the guy who was guarding the door?" I realized and since Kakashi did not give a response, I assumed it was true.

"No wonder I had a strange feeling about the guy." I muttered and than Kakashi pulled back to look at me.

"If you want to avoid any pain I suggest that you freely give yourself in otherwise-

-Otherwise what?! You'll stab me, no, slice me into dices, no even better, blow me up to bits! I don't care what you are going to do to me, but I won't accept to be locked away, never! I swear I'll always break free no matter where you lock me up!"

Kakashi gave an amused chortle and shook his head.

"You never learn, do you? You know I was willing to shorten your sentence, because usually if you run away you're sentenced to jail."

I scoffed at his statement.

"You and willing to shorten my sentence? That's the best thing I heard so far! What do you suggest next? Oh, I can help you to break out of prison? Oh wait a moment! Actually I am already in jail!"

I shoved him away from me and I pointed my finger at him.

"Now you listen to me, punk! I've got some words for you! You are full of lies, your speeches, your behaviour everything is fake! You've got no reputation, no skill and it makes me laugh to hear that you are one of the top shinobis of Konoha, because you are not! You think it's funny to trample over people's feelings, you think it's funny to take advantage of them and throw them away, HUH?! And to believe I fell for your act, makes me sick! You are a man without feelings, a piece of trash that deserves to be ranking with Orochimaru and Akatsuki! I HATE YOU ABOVE ANYTHING I'VE HATED IN MY LIFE!" I declared with anger and panted at my outburst.

Kakashi observed me; throughout my speech he kept the same indifferent face.

"Finally it's out. I'm glad we understand each other better, but I don't care about what people think or say about me anyway, it doesn't move me the slightest. It's my job to deceive, but you were naïve from the start to trust me so blindly. What can I expect from a teenager anyway?"

His words made me grow angrier and angrier. I wanted to hurt him so much, made him pay for everything and I had already in mind what could hurt him. I lowered my head.

"Hasn't you selfishness, arrogance, pride and insensitivity caused deaths to many of your companions?" I began and raised my head to look at him sharply and then I pointed to his covered eye.

For the first time he showed some signs of reaction.

"Wasn't it Obito who gave you the Sharingan?"

Involuntarily he touched his covered eye and he showed the surprise in his face regarding my question.

"As a kid you were just like Sasuke, reserved, solitary, resentful and selfishly pitying yourself over your own loses and problems rather than creating bonds. Everything needed to go your way, no wonder you had a hard time with Obito. Because from your point of view he was a wuss for carrying the name of Uchiha, not to mention you on purposely picked the team of Sasuke because Naruto resembled Obito. Is it because you picked that team in order to redeem your sins? After all, it's you who let Obito get killed."

Kakashi's face became shocked when he heard about my knowledge about his past. I chuckled pathetically at him.

"Don't be shocked Kakashi, like you heard I am from another dimension and I know a great deal a lot about you. I am sure if you hadn't had any defaults than your friends would have been alive and you wouldn't have suffered so much, but anyway who cares about that anyway."

"I know that you killed Obito and I am sure that even Rin, never did forgive you. Simply because your dad was a legendary Sanin and that you own all that privilege, you believed you could boss people around? Only some spoiled and ignorant brat would do that! Your idiotic belief that missions are more important than friends, made you what you are now. A person without feelings, without friends and without purpose in life,"

"Do you think they would forgive you after the same way you treated them? It is because of your selfishness and arrogance that Obito is dead and Rin too-

The words died from my mouth, when I looked down to my stomach and finding the kunai which still was held by Kakashi plunged in my stomach. I couldn't see Kakashi's face because I was so shocked to find the kunai in my stomach and shocked that Kakashi actually stabbed me. Brusquely he slammed me against the wall, his hand clutching my throat. I saw his gaze and felt the instant surge of dread. His look was the scariest I have ever seen. It nearly resembled to a demon. His silver eye brows were arched down with intensity, his eyes were murderous and his expression was menacing and scared the hell out of me!

"You better not say another word! If you don't want me to burst your head!" he growled coldly and menacingly.

I instantly regretted that I ever talked about this, he still was hurt by this and pricking such delicate topic would always result to this. His grasp tightened around my neck, the blood was pulsing in my brain like I was about to burst. The oxygen was slipping out of my system. I was convinced that I was going to die and the tears sprung to my eyes, weakness overcame me and the blood trickled from my mouth. This time I wasn't going to avoid death.

However Kakashi's grip trembled and promptly he released me and I crashed to the ground. My sight was getting blurry and I was feeling nauseous. He pushed my body over with his foot so that I lay on my back, he removed the kunai from my stomach and threw it aside with such force that it clanged and clinked propelling loudly in the corridor. When I saw his blurred face hovering over me, my arms shot up and gesticulated wildly to hit him, but he successfully held them in his grip. His Sharingan eye was exposed and for the first time I saw the dots in his iris spin. I watched them spinning with enchantment and suddenly began to lose my strength. My energy was sucked out in an instant, letting the world fade and darken as the seconds passed by and ultimately I lost consciousness before realizing it.


	38. Chapter 37

**HERE ANOTHA CHAPIE, HOPE YOU GUYS LOVE IT^^**

**

* * *

CHAPTER THIRTY SEVEN**

- Incarceration, Leakage and impossible truth -

The smell of mildew, calk and moist rock lingered in my nose for some time. I heard voices whispering, shouting, arguing or simply discussing. The clinking and clanking, scraping and plus the plopping of drops against the stones were the only repetitive and annoying sounds that made me so frustrated. It was like listening to a broken record only that its volume varied and sometimes human voices mingled with it, making the sounds so insanely unbearable.

Finally I was regaining my consciousness and was shocked to discover where I landed. I was lying against the cool and moist cave walls and the only light that illuminated this room was the barred entrance. It took me a moment to realize it, but I actually was in a cell. I got up and heard the clinking and scraping of metal. I looked at my hands and feet and noticed that I was in shackles. I also noticed my clothing. I was wearing plain, dull and baggy jail clothing, a grey shirt and a grey pair of pants made of cotton. I shivered and clasped my arms over my body. It was cold and judging from the temperature and the moisture, I was deep underground. I walked over to the entrance, scarping my chains over the stone floor and when I was about to make a reach for the iron bars, the chains prevented me from going any further. I stood there trying forcefully to reach for the iron bars and get closer, but it was in vain and additionally the shackles bruised my wrists and ankles. My heart hammered fearfully against my ribs, feeling cluster phobic and helpless I dropped to the ground and stared with shock at the iron bars.

They actually put me in jail…only because I AM DIFFERENT! With anger I cursed loudly and tried freeing myself from these shackles, but my body was too weak. I realized I haven't eaten for several days and my body trembled and groaned for food. I looked around me for something edible but of course I found nothing. I turned around and studied my cell. In the left corner I found a pile of straw, which appeared to be my bed and on the right corner was a dirty old sink and an ugly toilet. Instead of feeling like a prison cell it felt more like a tomb where many prisoners died. Repulsion washed over me and when I felt some crawling over my hands, I jumped up with a shriek and brushed off anxiously the bugs.

Then I heard some heavy clanking, as if something was unlocking and a heavy creaking. I heard a troop of footsteps tapping against the stone floor and no sooner the hallway in front of my cell was filled by a crowd of Anbus. In the centre of the crowd stood one tall Anbu, who seemed to be the captain.

"So you're finally awake." He mentioned calmly.

"Yes, good for you! But I'm hungry." I retorted

The guy didn't react instead he made some movements towards the door of my cell. His companion unlocked the cell and the entire crowd poured into my cell. I looked at them alarmingly and the leader spoke again.

"We have orders to bring you, you have a visitor."

Abruptly the Anbus grabbed me by my wrist, getting rid of my shackles and holding my wrists against my back to prevent me from running away. I was directed out of my cell up the stairs and out of the so-called basement. We walked up further stairs until we reached a flat and wide spacious area. It looked like an underground base except that along the walls were many cells carved into the granite walls. It looked like an underground city, except that it was filled with prisoners and cells rather than houses. I could hear the noises now, men shouting, arguing, discussing and cackling in their cells or were led around by wardens. The atmosphere was heavy and I encountered many murderous looks and I began to question myself, was I any similar to them?

I was guided through a door and I stepped into a well lit hallway, which had shiny walls and shiny floors. We walked along the corridor until we turned at one door and the Anbus pushed me into the room and strapped me to a white chair. The room was blazing white and everything else in it too. A crammed and unpleasant atmosphere surrounded this room.

The Anbus disappeared and I sat there in utter silence. The clock was ticking on the wall and I noticed it was 2 PM. I must've slept for 12 hours or even more in my cell. It did not surprise me, after all getting stabbed by Kakashi, getting hypnotized and plus starving to death, no wonder I slept like a stone. Finally the door opened behind me and somebody stepped in. The person than walked around me and sat down at the chair across the table. The first thing that hit me were the cold and piercing eyes of an individual that I haven't seen in my entire life not even once in the Naruto World. The individual had raven black hair, cold brown eyes that were sharp, his skin was pale and his lips were fine. He wore some glasses and appeared to be very intelligent and calculative.

"I'm Kyo, your new interrogator for the time being since Ibiki is on mission."

I looked at him critically, there was something strange and out of place about this guy, I couldn't put my finger on it. He placed his block on the table and skimmed through the information.

"So you are Hanshin Sara, age 18, obviously female and origins unknown-

-Cut the crap already! Just tell me what you want!" I interrupted him sharply, fed up of going through the entire process once again.

The guy raised his piercing eyes and with one finger pushed his glasses in place. The interrogator placed his elbows on the table and rested his chin on the back of his hands and observed me with interest.

"Tsunade sama has been asking for quite some time now about your origins and would like to know your true purpose here. Some claim you come from another world, why don't you be precise?" he said while going through some of the notes.

I had a bad feeling about this man and the problem was why did he seem so familiar? I scoffed.

"Do you think I'll tell you where I am from? I'm only telling I landed here by accident-

-If so, how?"

I rolled my eyes and groaned.

"You won't get far with me I tell you that, everybody considers me crazy anyway-

-I am familiar with these issues, but don't you think that by being honest you're jail sentence will be shortened?"

"Anyway none of you can distinguish that my words are true or false-

-I can." Cut the interrogator across, his gaze ever so more piercing.

This guy was giving me the creeps! He took his pen and showed he was prepared to take notes.

"I know you hate this jail. I can help you to get out of jail and I am only asking for your cooperation."

His gaze softened up and for the first time, he showed actually a smile. It did relieve some tension yet I was still suspicious of him.

"How come is that I never met you before?"

"I am a special interrogator unit that serves directly under Hokage Sama."

Still I looked at him unconvinced, does he really think I would buy off that stuff he's saying. It's like walking into a bank, dressed up as a robber and claiming that he isn't going to steal anything. Than an interested smirk appeared on his face and he leaned over to me.

"Are you planning to rot in this cell of yours? Are you going to give in to their accusations that claim you are a spy, although you are innocent? Are you going to let them judge you for being a criminal only because you possess special gifts?" He told me in a low but serious voice.

He was right about everything, I was letting them accuse me for things I haven't done and most importantly they were treating me as a criminal. What did I do to them? NOTHING! Of course! I restrained myself from running loose and telling them my knowledge about Konoha, but still it doesn't give them a right to incarcerate me. Not to mention my abilities and my demon brought me here in the first place and also the twisted rumours or misinterpretations. I can only blame one person, Kakashi.

"You are talented. From a simple girl transforming into a full fledged shinobi in several months must be respected and not disregarded as a spy or a monster. I can understand that people mistreated you for your difference but to fall so low as to incarcerate a person? Is atrocious and a bad reputation for Konoha who usually shows good heart and will towards foreigners."

I began to agree more and more with him, he was right about everything. It looked he read my mind, yet I felt some insecurity towards him. The interrogator took his pen once more and looked at me hopeful.

"If you answer to my question, I can assure your quick release."

I gave a thought about it, a part of me urged to answer the questions whilst the other was highly suspicious of this guy. Its true there was something fishy about him and I had the awkward feeling that I knew him from somewhere.

"And you'll report this to Tsunade?"

The interrogator nodded.

"I'll make sure she reads it before any reports, because I believe you are innocent and that this whole case is nonsense."

I was instantly interested and motivated by his words. He gave me a determined air.

"Are you ready?"

I nodded and the interrogation began.

* * *

The interrogation took a whole hour, I spoke, and he questioned and scribbled notes on the pad. However this insecurity grew and grew and so did my suspicion. I talked to him about where I am from, how I arrived here, how I adapted, how I received the demon and how my strength spontaneously got better. I was only fortunate enough that he didn't ask any questions about my knowledge over Konoha, especially the fact that my knowledge over Konoha came from reading the Naruto books. With content he finished off his notes, closed the note pad and looked at me with a smile.

"You did good work today, I'll deliver the information to Tsunade Sama and maybe in the next day or two I'll visit you again."

I felt at ease to get some of the information off of my shoulder, however there was some regret that I actually told him all this. He cleaned up his things, put them away and got up. He knocked against the door and called

"You can take her away."

The door opened and before he left the room, his calculative gaze lingered on me and then he inclined his head and left the room entirely.

The Anbu were quick enough to untie me and direct me out of the room and all the way back down to my cell. Once again I was tied up and the food was brought to me, without a second to waste I devoured the entire food without leaving a single crumb.

* * *

Time flew by painfully slowly in my cell, I was completely disoriented. I didn't know the time, the day or which month it was. I was living in a hole where time never existed. I didn't know when to go to sleep or to get up only that my food was brought three times a day. I got used to sleeping in the straw, used that the bugs crawling all over my body and used to being dirty. I forgot the taste of oxygen. I forgot the warmth of the sun, or the warmth of a person. I had several times the impression that I was forgotten and as a result I became a recluse. I didn't know whether I missed being around people or not. I became like the fungus covering the stones that neither lived nor expressed any emotions. I was convinced that I was going to die in here and all the sorrow, all the trouble haunted me and made my living difficult in the cell. To make the time pass by, either I would scratch with the stones some drawings against the walls or would simply toss the stones around. I even invented and played games like a tiny child! However despite all the misery I felt, there was this one light that kept me going, hope. Hope that I was going to be set free, always I waited with anticipation for the arrival of this interrogator and one day, my wish became true.

* * *

A smaller group of three Anbus picked me up from my cell and brought me back to the interrogation room. I found that familiar figure sitting at the chair and I was directed to my seat, bound to it and the Anbus left. The interrogator waited until the Anbus closed the door and than spoke.

"Hi Sara, sorry that it took so long, but it's making progress."

"Really?" I sputtered my voice sounding hoarse from keeping my mouth shut for several days.

"How many days has it been since I was in jail?"

"Two weeks?"

"What? Than how long did you take?" I repeated with disbelief and surprise.

"It took me more than a week to make some progress and I am sorry to have made you wait. Things appeared more complicated than expected."

"What's the problem?"

The guy sighed and leaned forward.

"It seemed that some people are desperate to keep you in jail-

-Who?" I demanded bitterly.

"Obviously Tsunade and the rest of the shinobis."

I clenched my hands to fists and retorted.

"Damn it! I am not a criminal! I didn't do anything wrong, why can't they believe me?"

I bit my trembling lip, everything was so frustrating and I felt nothing has progressed from the very beginning.

"It's typical Konoha, they tend to judge before understanding the issue. That's why one shouldn't trust any Konoha shinobis because they always betray you."

I raised my head promptly to stare at him. What did he just say? The interrogator got up and walked behind me, he rested his hands on my shoulders making my muscles tense and he lowered his head next to my ear.

"Aren't you fed up of living in the hands of Konoha? Playing the role as a puppet that must execute orders? Don't you hate being precautious, suppressing your true self and abilities out of fear of getting incarcerated, mistreated and disrespected?" he whispered in my ear and I pulled away to retort.

"Who are you?"

The interrogator chuckled confidently and his hand caressed my cheek.

"I am a person that is willing to set you free, I cannot let such a talented shinobi rot in such a place."

I froze stiff, I forgot the human touch, I was afraid of this guy, and his words did not give me the slightest comfort. Although I did hold some grudges against Konoha, still it didn't make me hate them to the point that I could maybe kill them!

"Who are you really, who sent you?"

He moved around so that he stood in front of me, his piercing gaze observing me.

"We are willing to give you freedom and choice to be who you really are. We don't restrict you from releasing your hatred over those who hurt you, we don't imprison you for your differences, but we encourage and support you."

His face approached mine, his hand drove over my face pushing the bangs from my face and caressing my cheek.

"Who are you and what you want from me?" I questioned with a sever tone.

The man's face came even closer and his fingers drove over my lips, he seemed tempted to kiss me. I pulled my head away and repeated my question.

"Now who are you and what you want from me?" I demanded now with impatience and the man pulled back and looked at me with amusement.

"Who I am has of little importance, what I want is to ask you to join us."

My eyes widened with disbelief and I stared blankly at him. He then chuckled.

"Don't act so shocked Sara, we know you have talent and simply we want you to be part of us, I can tell you, you'll find lots of your kinds."

He lowered his face once again to my eye level and he smirked.

"I don't have to reveal my name, because you know who I am."

I observed him with confusion and than gradually thought and studied his face and body language. It struck me like lightning and I recoiled with horror. I backed my chair away from him so that I hit the wall.

"Oh my God! It's you, K-

-Yes, it's me." He covered my mouth with his hand and retrieved it to approach my face.

I couldn't believe that Kabuto was standing right there in front of me, asking me to be part of Orochimaru's gang!! The discovery made me speechless and so shocked that I didn't notice his closeness. He cupped my face and turned my face so that I looked at him.

"If you want to be part of us, than you must break out of jail and go North beyond the Konoha border. We'll see your escape from prison as a test to be accepted as a member of Orochimaru's followers."

Abruptly his lips crushed mine with such brutality that it shocked me and scared me.

"Nnng, nggn!" I protested, but his devouring lips engulfed every word of my protest.

His tongue lashed over my lips and pressed to enter my mouth. The tears sprung to my eyes and I clamped my mouth shut. Kabuto pulled back and smirked, his hand rested on each side of the arms of my chair.

"At least I can guarantee you that you will be well treated, especially if I am interested in you."

The tears rolled down my cheeks in fear and he raised his hand, when his hand touched my cheek, I twitched in fright.

"I don't think an interrogator should use such methods to force information out of a detainee." Called a familiar voice and Kabuto simply turned his head to the source.

The door stood ajar and Kakashi was looking in, keeping a sharp eye on the so-called interrogator. I averted my gaze and lowered my head, the tears kept on flowing. It was too painful to see or even hear him, but my fear and general physical exhaustion made me so vulnerable that I couldn't hold back my tears. Kabuto pulled back entirely, he gave one last look at me than looked at Kakashi. Kakashi was now in the room and he closed the door behind him.

"What did you do to her?"

"As an interrogator, if the detainee is being stubborn, drastic measures can be taken."

"Yea, by making a move on her? I don't think that interrogators are allowed to use such method and anyway who are you?" Kakashi was giving absolutely no chance to Kabuto to escape the topic or the interrogatory room and I could feel that Kakashi was suspicious too.

Despite of the sticky situation, Kabuto kept a calm and confident attitude, feeling not the slightest threatened of Kakashi's presence.

"I'm Kyo, part of an elite interrogatory squad."

Kabuto pulled forth a card and showed it to Kakashi. It was Kabuto's identity card as Kyo. Kakashi observed critically from the ID to Kyo.

"Anyway I'm done interrogating her; Tsunade Sama will receive another report from me." The interrogator indicated to his thick note pad.

Since Kakashi couldn't do much he handed the ID back to Kyo and the interrogator began to clean up his things. Kakashi's gaze not once left the interrogator, I could tell he found him as suspicious as I did in the beginning. The interrogator was ready and prepared to leave the room, Kakashi blocked his way eyed him sharply but Kabuto simply walked around him and reached the door. Last time he looked at me and expressed with a smile.

"I hope we'll meet each other another time." He mentioned and left the room entirely.

My body trembled with fear and Kakashi slammed the door shut, giving me a start.

His face was serious and sharp.

"What did he do to you?"

I bit my lip and looked away from him, why is he asking, should I even bother telling him? All of a sudden, he spun the chair around, slammed his hands on the arms of my chair and he insisted with uncontrollable anger:

"What did HE do to YOU?"

I kept my gaze lowered, how could I look at him, after how much he hurt me? How can he expect me to answer? He wouldn't believe me anyway.

"Why do you care what happens to me all of a sudden?" I muttered.

He gave my chair a shake to reinforce his point:

"Quit being stubborn, Sara! Or I'll have to use my own way to get some information out of you!"

I burst in tears and shouted back at his face.

"Go ahead; rape me if you like to get some information out of me, why should I care anymore! Only thing that matters for anybody here is to squeeze the living life out of people!"

Kakashi observed me with growing frustration and he retorted.

"It never has been my intention to do that to you, because I…!" he brusquely swallowed the last couple of words, as if he was forbidden to finish his sentence.

His dark eye looked at me with desperation and mixed feelings. I could tell he was tormented to spill out those words and he kept staring at me with such intensity and I merely looked at him in bewilderment.

"Kakashi quickly! One of Orochimaru's men is walking around in this very prison!" I interrupted him briskly and urgently.

Kakashi regained himself and looked at me with shock.

"What?"

"He's the interrogator, Kabuto is the interrogator, get him quickly!" I stressed him and abruptly he let go of my chair and dashed out of the room.

I watched him leave. Did he actually believe me? … My head was hurting; I was so confused about everything that happened!

* * *

It turned out to be that I was right. The entire prison was in uproar, because one of the wardens had encountered the interrogator and was instantly attacked and badly wounded. However it did not simplify my life in prison, instead I was fully and mercilessly interrogated and all possible Jounins plus Tsunade and Kakashi were part of it. They questioned about what Kabuto had asked me, in what stuff he showed some interest and so forth.

All of a sudden during the interrogation, a shinobi barged in, completely out of breath. All shinobis looked at him.

"We found…the real body…of the interrogator Kyo…outside the walls…in the forest." He panted and everybody showed a shocked expression.

"This is bad," began Tsunade deep in thoughts.

"We still don't know if THAT girl will join his forces-

-HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND! I'd rather die than join him!" I shouted at all of them with frustration.

Tsunade turned her attention to me.

"You better shut up girl, as a prisoner you've got nothing to say! You are the one attracting all problems! And how can I believe the things she's saying anyway!" hissed Tsunade and then amazingly Kakashi came forth.

His hands were in his pockets and he kept a cool attitude.

"Hokage Sama, don't forget she alerted us of his presence and secondly if she wished to join forces with Orochimaru she wouldn't have said a word."

Tsunade glowered at Kakashi.

"You also got nothing to say, Kakashi! You've been siding with her on several occasions and I know you've got a soft spot for her, which will only make everything worse." She snapped and slammed her fist on the table to make a declaration. "Hereby I declare you excluded from the entire case!"

Kakashi was about to protest for this unjustifiable act, but instead he turned away and walked towards the exit, however before exiting the room he stopped.

"I think this whole case is bullshit, including your overreaction towards such a tiny detail." He declared loudly and stormed out of the room.

Myself and many others were surprised to hear such a tone coming from Kakashi's mouth, especially towards his authority. I could see Asuma and Kurenai exchanging somewhat understanding looks, as if they knew the reason for Kakashi's reaction. But myself like many others watched dumbly at the door. Talks were exchanged between the shinobis saying "I never thought Kakashi could get so upset over that" or "It's no point to use such foul language towards Hokage sama" and even some quietly showed admiration "Wow, I wish I could have the guts to do that". I realized it myself that Kakashi's reaction contradicted his character. For the first time in the whole Naruto story, he actually got angry to Tsunade or showed some disapproval towards what's happening to me. Does he after all regret what he did? Or is there more behind it?

My thoughts were interrupted, when suddenly somebody cleared his throat and it was Gai.

"Tsunade Sama, in part I share the same perspective as Kakashi, I believe we spend unnecessary time on this and I do believe we overreact on this case."

"I do believe it too." Many shinobis voted on Gai's account and all were blown away by Tsunade's yell.

"SHUT UP ALL OF YOU!"

The room became instantly quiet and she shot her arm to one direction.

"Asuma, Kurenai! Both of you are doing the first watch, no complaints! And the rest of you, assemble at my office and pronto!" she declared firmly and stormed out of the room.

The room gradually emptied and finally only Asuma, Kurenai and I were left behind. Asuma sighed deeply.

"Hey guys can you bring the detainee back to the cell?" inquired Asuma to the Anbus that stood nearby and without a word they complied.

I was tied loose from the chair, than my wrists were tied behind my back and the Anbus led me back to my cell and Asuma and Kurenai followed. In no time I was back in my cell, where the Anbus attached my shackles back to my wrists and ankles and left my cell. Only Kurenai and Asuma were left and now sitting on stools in front of my cell.

"Seriously this woman has to make everything more difficult, what a drag." Complained Asuma and puffed on his cigarette.

"Asuma, I don't think you should say such stuff."

"Still, I agree what Kakashi says about this; sometimes Tsunade Sama does exaggerate with things. I mean look! It's depressing to see a kid in prison in shackles and in a prison uniform!"

I turned my head to him and soon turned it away. I didn't want any pity. Tiredly I dragged my heavy feet to my sleeping place and dropped on it. I curled up and gathered a bit of the straw around me to keep me warm and soon as I rested my head in the straw I already dropped into a light doze.

* * *

I don't know how long I was sleep, but I lost my interest in sleeping and slowly woke up. I had changed my sleeping position in my sleep somehow, my sight cleared and I found that my head was directed towards the iron bars. What I saw nearly made my eyes pop out of my eye sockets.

Kurenai wasn't sitting anymore on her stool instead she actually sat on Asuma's laps with her face facing his. Asuma's hand was either on her derriere or underneath her shirt crawling up her back. Obviously both were passionately making-out which made me turn away. My God! Those guys are so bold to actually do such a thing in public, not to mention in front of meeee!!!! I felt annoyed about it, especially how their lips smacked and all that!! How am I supposed to react in such situations, keep my mouth shut or shout? Their movements and noises seemed to get louder and seriously, it was embarrassing and gross, no matter how cute the couple is! I tossed around and called.

"Look, if you are so desperate to have sex than PLEASE not in front of me!" I growled with irritation.

Finally I heard them stop moving and briskly movements were made. Finally I turned around and found both of them seating innocently on their stool with red cheeks. I sat up and looked at them. I couldn't take it anymore and fell back in the pile of straw and whined.

"Why the hell did she have to put those two love birds as my guards, why do I have to suffer so much?"

I whimpered and whined with my face in the straw.

"Sorry, Sara, it's Asuma who started it –

-What do you mean that I started it? You're the one that came on my lap!"

"Well you started kissing me and encouraged me to sit in your lap."

"Well you-

-Oh stop it already! Why don't you just go and leave me alone." I whined miserably and my eyes prickled with tears.

The thought that Kakashi and I could have been like this, painfully stung my heart and I don't know why I was so hopeful that something like that would ever happen. But I'm in here, in a cell, accused for x-what crime and Kakashi hates me! I cannot understand any of this, he makes me so confused! I heard Kurenai's voice calling for me and this time she sounded compassionate.

"Sorry Sara, we sincerely didn't mean to make you feel like this."

I sat up with my back facing them and I clutched my arms. The tears rolled down my cheeks, I was in such pain, my heart was screaming with anguish. No matter how much pain Kakashi inflicted on me, I still could forgive him and my love for him grew even stronger. I had such a strong longing for him; I know it was ridiculous and most likely impossible to be actually together with him. I don't fit even in this story nor am I part of Kakashi's life, I'm just a side character that appears and disappears at the next chapter.

"You love him so much, don't you?" asked Kurenai gently and I stopped with a start.

I turned around to them and found Kurenai with her head between the bars. Asuma remained on the stool and observed me with sympathy. I walked over to them and sat down up to my limit. A meter separated me from the bars and Kurenai and Asuma. My tears were so heavy and I wished this pain could stop, it became so unbearable. Kurenai outstretched an inviting hand and I placed my trembling hand in hers. She held it comfortingly. Even more tears came, I felt so free to express my sorrow and my trouble. I needed somebody to just believe me and comfort me, no matter whom, even a friend. I was longing for this warmth. I missed it so terribly and I just realized how much home sick I was. I wanted my parents and my siblings to hug me and welcome me back. Is it a sin to ask for that?

"Sara, I just want to let you know, Asuma and I support the fact that you are innocent and I believe many think that."

Relief washed over me, giving me some energy and still I continued crying, I was moved and yet frustrated. Some people did believe in my innocence, not everybody was against me, but what about Kakashi?

"I can't believe that you love that guy, I don't see any qualities that are attractive about him." Mentioned Asuma and Kurenai eyed him with a scowl.

"You don't know because you're a man, all men have something attractive."

Asuma sighed and took a puff from his cigarette.

"Anyway that guy deserves some loving; he's such a lonely and depressing person."

"Are you being sympathetic or just telling that to get him off your shoulders?" retorted Kurenai with a sharp glare.

From Asuma's facial expression, he twitched unpleasantly and then sighed.

"Look, on one hand I'm being sympathetic, I do believe he needs some caring, he's such a hopeless case, but on the other hand he annoys me with his complaints of not finding "the perfect woman". What irritates me the most, he's never satisfied with all the women I showed him! He simply has a fling with them!"

I observed Asuma and smiled pathetically at myself, so he's that type of person, I should have known.

"But what's sure," continued Asuma abruptly and I looked at him. "He likes you a lot."

"What?!" I repeated with disbelief and jumped up to my feet.

Asuma nodded confidently and eyed me.

"Yes, Sara, he only has his eyes on you and no one else."

I backed away, shaking my head with distrust.

"That's not true; I refuse to believe any of this!"

Asuma got up, nipping on his cigarette and revealing a confident face.

"I never have been so sure in my life. I know Kakashi. He may have not realized it but he continuously speaks about you and sometimes I caught a glimpse of warmth in his usual cold eye while he spoke about you,"

"I don't believe you realized it, but he cares a lot about you more than you ever imagine. It's even amazing to see him constantly concerned about somebody else instead of himself. He changed so much at your absence. He became anti-social, irritable and depressive. You cannot imagine what kind of face he made, when he was allowed to visit the prison compound."

I listened to his words, with my heart hammering and with my head on the verge of bursting. Everything was extremely confusing, what should I believe?

"Right, you confessed your love to him?" asked Asuma with a stronger voice and neared the bars.

I stared blankly at him with my mouth agape. Asuma grinned.

"Your declaration became a heated rumour in entire Konoha. Kurenai and I asked Kakashi about it and believe it or not - he reacted with relief and delight."

His statement felt like a boulder on my shoulders, tension kept on building any minute I was going to burst.

"I'm certain he might feel the same way, as you feel towards him."

That's it! I cannot take it anymore!

"SHUT UUUP!" I bellowed with such fury that the shackles electrocuted me.

I dropped to my knees, the current zapped around my body, making my body twitch unpleasantly. The tears sprung to my eyes.

"Lies! Lies and lies after another! What am I supposed to believe now! After all the lies brought me to this cell-

-But-

-NO! I won't hear another word about this!" I interrupted Kurenai harshly and glared at them.

"None of you understand this, do you believe I can trust anybody's words now, after getting locked up here?! Let me remind that all of this was pre-arranged! Even all Kakashi's care and friendliness were pretences!"

I got back on my feet and kept a sharp eye on them.

"If you claim that he loved me, than explain me why he has gone through all of this to throw me into jail? Normally if he did love me, he would have prevented my incarceration, isn't that right, HUH!?"

Neither Asuma nor Kurenai could respond, it seemed to be the only point that they forgot to include in their reasoning.

"You cannot imagine how much I HATE that guy! He thinks it's obviously funny to play around with girls and drop them! He's a cold-hearted monster who disrespects women! … He- he makes me hurt so much!"

I dragged myself back to my pile of straw and dropped in it. Can't they leave me alone with my pain? Why does it pleasure them to poke on it? What's more to believe? I hate Kakashi and he hates me! All of you go away! Let me rot in here, if you like, I just want to die with my pain! So much frustration curdled in my system, making me feel so lousy and exhausted. After prolonged crying, I fell into a deep sleep.


	39. Chapter 38

**HIYA EVERYBODY!!!!!"THANKS FOR THE 200 REVIEWS!!!!! I AM SO HAPPY!!!! HOWEVER SORRY FOR THE DELAY... I'VE BEEN PREOCCUPIED WITH A EARNEST THING IN LIFE, SOMETHING SO PRECIOUS, SO BLISSFUL, SO WONDERFUL THAT I FEEL I AM IN THE SEVEN HEAVENS^^ OH YEAH! MY LIFE TOOK SUCH A COLORFUL TURN THAT BASICALLY EVERY DAY, I AM GRINNING LIKE A HOPELESS FOOL^^ So, here goes another chapie and i can proudly declare that its coming to an end and as usual HUGE THANK YOUS TO ALL READERS AND REVIEWERS and please continue to make my day the happiest ever^^**

**

* * *

  
**

**CHAPTER THIRTY EIGHT**

- The unbelievable escape with a price to pay -

According to the movements and the change of temperature, it was night. I believe I slept 12 hours straight. I felt miserable and defeated. My body ached with pain from my sleeping posture and the cold. I wonder why such a cell existed. All these detainees that suffered, I bet several thousands have died in here and ironically I will be one of them. However there was this fire of hope glowing in me and it grew stronger, scolding me for giving in so easily and whispering to me that I must take actions to get out of here. Memories of my family flashed in front of my eyes, giving me the surge of strength to wake up.

Once again I was curled up in a ball in my straw pile; the black granite ceiling loomed above me letting a drop of water splash on my cheek.

"Water…?" I muttered with surprise like I had forgotten that such an element existed.

Another drop fell on my cheek and gently rolled down my cheek. I could sense its pureness and freshness. I already could imagine myself under the rain or in my favourite lake, feeling the water caress me with care and embrace me. It was my element; it was a part of me. It seemed to be calling for me, encouraging me, cheering me and whispering to me gently. It spoke a secret enchanted language, which I cannot describe, but that gave me comfort and reassurance and hope. Somehow it was familiar to me; it reminded me of something in the past, maybe at my childhood. The memory was fuzzy, but the whispering grew louder. I could hear the water gurgling, drizzling, dripping, trickling and flowing above my head. It became louder and louder and I seem to be the only person able to hear it.

"_**Do you want to be free**?"_ echoed a foreign voice, which I believed came from the water.

"**_Aren't you fed up of being locked up? You are like a river, free to flow wherever you like, nothing can contain you."_**

"What?" I repeated with bewilderment.

"_**We are your element, you are us, and the water is your friend and is willing to help you**."_ The mystical voice echoed with absolutely no hostility or evil.

"How can you help me? I'm several kilometres underground."

"**_It is not a problem, you possess great strength in you that can make the impossible possible_**."

"What do you mean?" I pressed on and the water gurgled loudly.

"_**You are aware of your ability to manipulate water?**"_

I nodded, glancing at the ceiling, uncertain where to look.

**"_You can become one with us."_**

I stood there, confused about her statement and the element seemed to understand my confusion.

All of a sudden from the ceiling leaked some water, resembling to a shower of rain and gradually the water flowed towards me, forming itself to a human body, it was needless to guess who it was because it took the spitting image of myself. It was me only represented as a water figure, which was transparent. Its eyes had an empty and blank look, nothing resembling a human.

"You must disappear before the guards see you!" I warned it with anxiety and glanced at Asuma and Kurenai's sleeping figures.

**"_Don't worry, they can't see me nor hear us, we are communicating through telepathy and it was the same method you used with your demon_."**

A wave of relief swept over me.

"**_Time is short, we must proceed. Sara, do you want to leave this place?_**" My figure didn't move her lips but her calming face gave me some reassurance.

I nodded.

"Yes, I want to leave this jail and go home."

"_**Good. Time will come where you will return to your world**._"

"When and how?" I insisted with impatience.

"_**Time will reveal it**._"

"Please! Tell me more!"

The figure shook its head.

**"_The opportunity will come, especially if you aren't from this world. Now let's begin._"**

The figure approached me until we were face to face.

**"_Why are you hesitating? Don't you want to leave this cell once and for all_?**" questioned my double.

"What happens if I unite with you?"

"_**I will bestow you with all my power**._"

"But why? I didn't help you as far as I remember."

The creature chuckled.

"**_I am a part of you. I am only a friend who seeks to help you_.**"

Still I wasn't convinced, I felt for some reason insecure about the whole thing, but before I could say more my double stepped through me instantly merging with my body. I felt a surge of power and the flame of hope blazed with glory. There was hope that I could get out. I closed my eyes, letting the element circulate in my body and powering up my chakara.

"**_Let human and water become one, let its power circulate in your body and guide you out of this place and bring you to safety_**." Echoed the voice within me, which gave me reassurance.

I felt so strong that I could bend the bars and break free, however the voice calmed me down.

"_**We mustn't attract attention, water is discrete and innocent, and we don't destroy or kill**._"

I didn't feel like killing but my new strength made me powerful enough to lift up mountains.

"How are we going to escape the place?"

"_**Flow silently and discretely like the water**._"

Before I could question it further, metal dropped on the ground with a dull clang which rebounded against the walls. It startled me and woke up Asuma and Kurenai instantly. They jumped up from their seats and watched me with disbelief. I looked down and realized that the shackles were unlocked and sprawled on the ground.

"How did you…?" stuttered Asuma with his cigarette nearly slipping off his lips.

I flexed my hands and observed them. My new powers must have removed the shackles, but I wonder how? However this wasn't bothering me, I walked over to them and stopped in front of the bars.

"You need to release me." I declared firmly and Kurenai and Asuma exchanged anxious looks but finally concluded with an approved face.

"Believe us we would like to do that, but I doubt you can escape from the tight and nasty surveillance of this prison compound." Expressed Asuma with unease but I showed a confident and determined attitude.

"I'll take another way." I mentioned with my gaze wandering the area

"Flow silently and discretely like water" I muttered the sentence repeatedly until my eyes fell on the drain in the hallway.

Asuma and Kurenai followed my gaze and both exclaimed with disbelief.

"You are going to escape through there?!"

I nodded and looked at them.

"By turning into water."

Kurenai and Asuma stared at me with bewilderment, as if i had gone completely crazy.

"EHH?!"

"If you clearly remember I can manipulate water-

-but you didn't say anything about transforming into it!" interrupted Asuma sharply.

"I just discovered that ability now."

"But-

Asuma was interrupted by Kurenai's hand that was resting on his forearm. He didn't seem to tolerate the fact that I was going to escape, it would hurt his reputation as a shinobi or hurt his manly pride, however Kurenai's reassuring and firm face convinced him to let go. He sighed defeated.

"Asuma, Kurenai, please understand, I'm not meant to be here, not meant to be in your world. I must leave this place so that all chaos that I've caused can be restored and forgotten. Konoha must focus on eliminating Akatsuki and Orochimaru and bringing back Sasuke rather than focusing on an insignificant person such as myself." I told them with growing desperation.

"Sara, do what you feel is right. Asuma and I won't hold you back, instead we'll cover your back." Reassured Kurenai and with delight and relief I rested one hand on Kurenai's forearm and the other on Asuma's.

"I'll never forget this, thank you so much."

Asuma and Kurenai showed content but Asuma quickly switched to his serious mode.

"You should hurry up, before somebody else comes."

I withdrew my hands and nodded with seriousness. I stepped back and gave a last look at them.

"Fare well, Kurenai, Asuma, it was nice meeting you both."

Both did not respond, it seems that they doubted my ability, but I didn't care any more and simply closed my eyes.

"_Are you ready?_" asked the voice and since I didn't show any hesitation or objection, the voice proceeded.

"**_Maybe you aren't aware of this, but such a technique consumes a lot of energy. For an average person it could become fatal, but since you possess the demon's power and your shinobi strengths, you may overcome death._**"

"What do you mean?" I asked with growing anxiety.

**"_For performing such a technique you must pay a price_-**

-And you just tell me this now?!

"**_Don't be distressed, Sara, it is a condition that requires a balanced exchange_."**

"Like WHAT if I may ask?" I questioned impatiently.

"In exchange for bestowing you with my power, I would need you to sacrifice your demon and your shinobi strength."

"WHAAT?! But-but!?"

"**_Those are the conditions, unless you desire to remain here…_"**

I gave a thought about it. Of course I don't want to stay here, but sacrifice all of my power in order to get out of jail, isn't that a bit unfair?

"**_Sara, it's the only safest option, it is my duty to bring you unharmed out of this compound to the area you desire, but you must cooperate with me otherwise it will not work_."**

I didn't have any choice, rotting in this cell would be my last option. I took a deep breath.

"Please bring me to the lake, I believe that your power can bring me there and take my sacrifice as your reward for your hard work."

"**_As you wish, mistress._**" Obeyed the voice.

Instantly I was hit by nausea. I dropped to the ground, the water in my body began to curdle and suddenly dissipate. My body began to dissolve into water starting from my feet and rapidly went up my body so that it entirely dissolved into water. I became a stream of water, pouring through the bars and pushing to the drain. My sight was crystal clear; I saw Kurenai and Asuma watch with disbelief mixed with fascination as I slithered towards the drain. I poured down into the drain and with a sudden gust of pressure it pushed me through the pipes.

I went crashing through the pipes with such power and speed that it made the pipes vibrate and creak. It freaked me out to some extent, but the voice gave me some reassurance.

"**_The pipes contain a lot of air pressure so that we can flow faster at high speed through the pipes_.**"

The walls of the pipes, the sudden intersections and curves flashed in front of my eyes. I finally could tell that we landed in the main sewer; we rushed through the underground tunnels joining with the waste. It made me so sick to see all of this and I just hoped I won't smell like shit when I come out.

"**_Hold on, we are going through the purification sector._"**

Before I could say another word, we fell down an enormous waterfall and landed into a container which had a net at the bottom.

"Oh my God! Please get me out of this!" I panicked and the voice reassured me.

"**_Just rely on my power; we'll be out faster than you think_."**

It was like a rocket being shot to space, we zoomed through the water at a high speed. Some places on my body began to hurt and I couldn't identify where the source was. We shot through the whole purification facility and managed to shoot out of a big pipe before getting poisoned by chemicals. It led us into a river. The rushing river brought us at a quick pace down the hill, where the water disappeared underground. In the pitch darkness of underground tunnel, the water rushed, zigzagging, making loops of 360° and crashing unto rocks. I felt nauseous and ready to pass out, but the voice shook me awake.

**"_Hold on for a little, if you pass out you might die_!**" warned the voice strictly and I stayed widely awake.

I felt so bad, if I had a chance to puke I would now, but I cannot. All of the spinning, loops made me so dizzy and disoriented that I wasn't aware how fast or how near we were. However finally we shot out of the pipe, which was underwater and the water was slowly pushing up to the surface.

"**_We have reached our destination; it's time for me to part from you._**"

"Wait! How will I become human again?" I retorted.

"**_It's happening…NOW._**" it whispered mystically.

Pain struck me and another one. It felt like my body was being shaped back together, parts of my limps are being collected and glued back on my body. I grabbed my throat, when my lungs filled itself with water. Anxiously I swam back to the surface, I felt weaker and more helpless than before. I kicked harder and faster, the need of oxygen pressed in my lungs and the need to cough some water out of my lungs made it even more difficult. I felt the water helping me, it gave me a thorough push and finally I broke to the surface with a loud gasp, followed by strong coughing. I couldn't recognize the area, it was dark and no moon or stars were in the sky.

Mist hovered over the lake and in the distance I could distinguish a shore, I swam over there and dragged myself out of the water and retch the water from my lungs. Then I simply dropped to the soft shore. I felt so weak and nauseous. I lay there, doing some breathing exercises to regain some energy.


	40. Chapter 39

**Thankies to all reviews, you guys^^ Thanks for your support, encouragments until now, it really makes me so happy!!!!! I really love y'all!!!!!!!! Continue to R&R^^Here you go anotha chapie^^**

**

* * *

CHAPTER THIRTY NINE**

- I…Love you -

I opened my eyes and noticed something about my hair. I sat up. When the hair fell into my face; a horrified gasp escaped my lips. That neck length, wavy blond hair and… With anxiety and horror I began to grope my face and the rest of my body. Oh my God! Then I scrambled over to the bank and looked into the water. Another horrified gasp followed. I turned back to my human self! (Of course as a Anime version^^). My body was less voluptuous, my face less pretty and my hair shorter, even my eyes were darker! To some extent it did relieve to see my old self again and to realize that I didn't look so bad after all. However it gave me a scare about how Kakashi might react if he finds me like this.

All of a sudden I heard a movement on the waters and plus a voice calling.

"OI! Is somebody over there?"

I sprung to my feet and burst into a run through the forest. Taken by panic, I ignored identifying the voice and ran harder and harder, it was brainless to run in the darkness because I could be a prey to anybody now that I am back to my human self. I pushed myself to the limit, breathlessly I leaned against the tree, and my legs were wobbling and protesting from the pain. The forest mounted the hill and even under the denseness of the forest and the darkness of the night, I could identify an outline of a house. I ran up the hill, halfway crawling up by grabbing a hold of roots. Finally I caught the porch and heaved myself over it. I found myself in front of an old, maybe abandoned shelter made for travellers. I couldn't hear a sound or movement emitting from the building, everything was silent.

Boldly I grabbed the sliding door and tried pulling it open, without a sound it slid smoothly open. The inside was too dark to see and I hesitated to enter it. It gave me the creeps to simply step into some house without knowing if somebody was in it. However I felt the presence of my pursuer behind me that I went in. I moved over to the corner, by groping along the wall. The room was small, maybe the size of the interior of a shrine. There were windows that illuminated the room and it seemed like it was inhabited by someone already. I bit my lip, damn! Maybe it belonged to my pursuer! My heart hammered with dread, what should I do?

…NO! I must defend myself, no matter what; I can assault him than knock him down! Yes! I'll do that! I shrunk into the corner and came across a stable yet wide furniture. I climbed on it. It was set up at a perfect angle for me to attack the stranger. I leaned against the corner, crouching and waiting to pounce on my enemy. The only sound was the pounding of my heart beats. Finally I heard a light but distinct sound outside on the porch. With my fists clenched I was ready to welcome that person. The sliding door began to vibrate and smoothly it slid open. An individual stepped in and closed the door behind him, I couldn't identify the person but all I could tell that it was a tall man.

I waited until he stood at a perfect angle and when he stood at the spot, I made a jump for it, clung myself around his back. Wrapping one arm around his neck and clasping my legs around his torso. The individual reacted instantly by forcing his back against the wall, trying to squash me, but stubbornly I kept on holding him. My arm grew tighter around his neck, however that person with his elbow banged against my side and I grunted painfully and released him completely. He then grabbed my arm, shoved me across the room so that I tripped over furnitures and smashed them. This guy was pissing me off! However before I could actually think, that guy punched me across the face so that I fell on top of the debris of furnitures. I wiped my bloody lip with the back of my palm, feeling the actual stinging pain of the punch which I previously never felt, and got back on my feet and retorted.

"You seriously are pissing me off!" I charged towards the person and tried punching him, but he grabbed a hold of my fist and twisted it so that he forced it against my back.

"Let go off me you bastard!"

I became rigid and silent when I felt the coldness of a blade, brushing my throat.

"You still are too tactless and have a loose trap as usual." Uttered the voice with amusement, which sent me a horrifying chill down my spine.

I could instantly recognize the voice and deeply wished it was a nightmare. Kakashi withdrew his kunai and he released my wrist, but instead of giving me space he wrapped his arms around me to hold me.

"Kakashi, what are you doing?" I demanded with the impatience bubbling in me and the confusion making me angry.

"I'm holding you."

My heart made a start.

"Kakashi let go of me!" I ordered but he refused.

I was getting angrier and ultimately I exploded. I wrenched his hands away from me and backed away.

"How DARE you hug me?! Stay away from me you traitor!" I retorted with revulsion.

However before I could even think straight, he managed to capture my lips and kiss me. Overcome by shock, I let it happen, but when he pulled back I slapped him in the face.

"You jerk! Stay away from me, you hear! You lousy, ungrateful --! I HATE YOU!" I shouted at him and turned away from him and marched to the door.

When I was about to open it, he slammed his hand against the door, preventing me from opening it.

"You aren't going anywhere until we settled this!"

"Settle what? Everything is settled already! I-HATE-YOU! That's all I've got to say!"

Kakashi groaned and forcefully slammed his palm against the door, to silence me.

"I've got a lot to say! Just give me a chance to-

-To explain!? HA! Do you seriously think I would listen to you after you put me to jail?!" I interrupted him sharply and shoved him away from me, to grab a hold of the door but he grabbed a hold of my wrist and pulled me to him so that he had one arm wrapped around my back.

"Don't you remember any of the special moments we had?"

"Of course not! Why should I? After all they were all pretences and means to get information out of me!" I retorted defiantly.

Kakashi became silent and since it was pitch dark I couldn't see his face. All of a sudden he embraced me with such overwhelm that it stunned me. He hugged me like he never has done before.

"I thought you loved me…" he breathed, his voice sounding small and desperate.

I couldn't bear this and begun struggling against him and finally pushed myself free from his embrace. I stepped back.

"Do you seriously think that after I was in jail for two weeks, I could still love you? I've got every reason to hate you!" I declared firmly and turned around and marched to the sliding door.

I grabbed the door and pulled it open.

"Farewell, Kakashi."

I left the house and descended the hill. The further I walked the further the vast between Kakashi and I expanded. Each heavy step pierced my heard. I felt the misery crawling up and my eyes begun to prickle. I bit my lip to contain myself, but it was impossible, the tears came with heavy sobs. It's the best for the two of us to go our own ways and forget about each other. I need to return to my world. There is surely a better person for him and not to mention a better person for me. Our differences is simply too great and unbearable. Please, Kakashi don't chase me!

I reached the foot of the hill, where I heard his voice calling for me, but I continued my way in quicker paces. Abruptly he appeared in front of me, the sky began to clear up, revealing the gloom of the moon and the bright stars. Gradually the forest became brighter until we could see each other's faces. Kakashi was breathless and reacted with surprise at my face.

"This is my true appearance! The weak Sara, who isn't talented in anything!" I exclaimed and after a silent moment he began to approach me, but I backed away.

"Stay away Kakashi!"

"No I won't!" he declared firmly and walked up to me, but I kept on backing away from him.

"What do you want from me? What did I do to you? Why can't you just let me go? I don't want to hurt no more!" I cried and Kakashi kept on coming.

"I'll keep on pursuing you wherever you run off to, I'll only stop when you hear me out."

"I don't wanna hear anything from you! It's all a pack of lies! I'm confused about everything! I even believe that my feelings towards you were lies as well, what should I believe in?"

My back came against the tree and before I could avoid it, Kakashi slammed his palms on either side of my head.

"You listen to me! I took in all your insults and you gave me no chance to explain myself!"

"I don't want to hear any of it! I'm sick and tiered of you!" I retorted and all of a sudden Kakashi placed an iron grip on my shoulders.

We vanished in a puff of smoke and landed back into the house. With horror I realized it and sprang to the door once more, but he held me back and shoved me back into the centre of the room, where I tripped over the broken furniture.

"Kakashi let me go!" I pleaded, backing away from his approaching figure and when my back touched the wall, he kneeled down.

"How can I make you listen to me?" asked Kakashi reaching the limit of his desperation.

"Only when you let me go!" I retorted.

Kakashi stopped dead in his movements; the overwhelming emotions sparkling in his eyes made me feel sorry for him. Then he pulled away, the shadow of the room covered his facial expression and he turned his back on me. I got back on my feet and watched his depressed back moving to the door and there he stopped.

"I've cherished every single moment with you. Every single word, behaviour and movements were directed to you, to be close to you. The past month and two weeks, I missed you unbearably. Every time you kissed me, hugged me, I wanted you so badly. My longing grew so strong for you; I want to be even closer to you…"

I froze to statue; I couldn't believe any of this. How could he possibly feel something like this towards me? Why, when, how... Or was it once again a lie?

Kakashi grabbed for the door, but once again he stopped in his movements. It seemed that he remembered something and brusquely he turned around. The intense emotions made him breathe faster. He walked up to me and instinctively grabbed my shoulders.

"I know you love me! I know it for sure!"

I shook my head firmly and declared defiantly:

"No, I don't! You don't know anything about me! It's been part of your plan to get me wrapped around your fingers and hand me over to your authority! My so-called feelings were actually a figment of my imagination!"

"No they weren't… They weren't…" his grip trembled against my shoulders; his body was weakened like he had been beaten.

"In part I did act in order to gain you trust, but what happened between us, the intimacy, was sincere, I realized my mistake. I want to pay for the damage of my actions." He spoke, his voice sounding strangled with emotions.

My heart pierced with such pain, but I must be harsh with him and push him away. None of this can ever work.

"Is that all you got to say? Now step aside, I need to go home!" I told him with indifference, ignoring every single bit he said.

Kakashi was so hurt by my statement that he nearly started to cry. Yet something kept him going, he remained stubborn and simply blocked the way.

"I won't let you out of this house!" he declared his voice stronger and determined with new energy.

Why was he persisting so much? Can't he not be defeated by my words and let me leave? Why? Why did it matter to him so much that I should stay? I must leave, I must go, why can't he understand that I am doing this because of him?!

"You got it all wrong Kakashi! Because it's not you that I love!"

He got another blow that shocked him into a stone figure and made his arms drop to his sides.

"It's no other than Steve; he's the one I love!" I declared in a strong voice with my heart ripping apart.

"But…Before you said-

-I know what I said! What can you expect from me after undergoing so much pressure and realizing that I was betrayed and used? I was confused, damn it! Because you resembled him so much, I've mixed him up with you and that explains my dreams about him and those feelings!"

He sharply pulled his mask down.

"THAT'S A LIE!" he exclaimed uncontrollably with his voice instantly cracking and his head shaking wildly.

His hands painfully like pincers grabbed my shoulders.

"I'm certain that you only saw ME and not Steve! Not once did you resist me! Back in the inn, when I mixed you up for a Geisha, you didn't stop me, you just let it happen. And back in the bathtub, you didn't stop me either or any other times I hugged you! It's plainly evident that you are lying!"

Kakashi panted heavily, his pained eyes tearing my heart apart, I need to go before I collapse and pour everything out of my system! I raised my hands and placed them on his hands and took them in my own hands.

Kakashi stopped with surprise, while observing blankly at me and at my hands holding his. I took a deep breath and looked at him, Sara be strong it's for his own good that you are doing this.

"I am not…Kakashi. I regard you as a friendly and caring teacher and nothing more." I told him calmly with a sincere voice and face.

I am sure that after I manage to leave, I'll be crying the tears out of my body and the pain of regret will haunt me forever until my grave. I had to lower my gaze from his eyes filled with anguish. My doubts about his intentions melted away, soon as he told me how much he wanted to be close to me, how much he longed for me.

I released his hands and passed him to go to the entrance. I took one last glance behind me and grabbed for the door.

"Wait, Sara!" he called and brusquely turned around to face my back.

I froze in my movements, hoping that he wouldn't pull me back or argue with me again.

"Let me tell you one truth and I want you to hear it."

I didn't express any objections since my back faced his direction and I didn't move a muscle.

"I…loved you since the very beginning." He declared with a trembling and emotional voice.

The tears sprung to my eyes and I covered my mouth in horror. I couldn't believe this?! This cannot be?! How could he love me, an insignificant person like me? How is it possible? Didn't he hate me; didn't he toy around with me for fun? I couldn't grasp the truth; it smothered me so much that my determination to leave him instantly crumbled. I was flooded by my burning feelings for him and the remorse of my words against him. Why did he have to pronounce those forbidden words? Why did he? Isn't he aware of our differences and the impossibility of our relationship? For God's sake, I can't take him home with me or stay here! If we get close now, I don't think I'll be able to leave this place! But-but-those feelings…My heart it pains for him…I want him, I want him so badly!

I brusquely turned around and ran into his arms, knocking Kakashi on his back and me on top of him with my lips glued to his. Kakashi froze stiff. I loved him so much with such passion that I never wanted to be separated from him ever again! I expressed my urgent longing for him with tears, which flowed down to our lips. I wanted him so much! Please God, give me this chance to be with him and let me love him! I loved the smoothness and roughness of his lips and their taste. When his hand placed itself around my lower back, I abruptly pulled away, climbing off of him.

I shrunk away of him, clasping my mouth as if I committed a sin and stared at Kakashi in shock. He sat up, his face stared back at me blankly with disbelief and his fingers rested on his lips. We stared at each other in terrifying silence and then I broke out in heavy sobs.

"Kakashi, why are you so cruel! Why do you make everything so complicated? I can't love you because I'm a human and you are an Animation character who lives in a fantasy world! We can never love each other or be together, because our differences are too great!" I sobbed with the pain stabbing my heart at each word.

"But I cannot hold back those painful feelings anymore! If I do I might burst! I never loved a man with such intensity! I truly and unbearably love you!" I sobbed miserably; finally it was out, the heavy lead in my chest that kept on smothering me.

I lowered my head, sobbing in my hands.

"What should I do…What should I do?"

All of a sudden I was pushed down to the floor, Kakashi's weight crushing my body and I called out in desperation:

"Kakashi!?"

"I don't care about anything. All I want is you!" Kakashi expressed, his piercing and serious gaze, giving my heart a painful squeeze.

He showed how serious he was about me by removing his shinobi equipments one by one. He began to take off his head gear dropping it aside with a dull clang on the wooden floor, and then he unzipped his Jounin vest, pulled off his hand gears, unlatching his Hip Pouch and Kunai Holster and pulled off his sandals and threw them aside. All weapons and shinobi equipments were off of his body, now he loomed over me in his Prussian blue shirt and pants. Then he grabbed the bottom of his shirt and pulled it off of his body with such grace, exposing his athletic torso and throwing the shirt aside. Not once did his gaze left my eyes, the whole process of undressing himself in front of me was a torture for my heart, it was hammering so hard. He was simply perfect and beautiful to my eyes. I was simply breathless of his penetrative gaze and his torso. His figure than re-approached my own with his face nearing mine and I turned my head away, feeling insecure.

"No! Wait, Kakashi!"

"I'm tiered of waiting any longer! All this time I've been longing for you! I cannot hold it back and I know you feel the same!"

"Please, stop Kakashi; you make everything more difficult for me!"

"No, I don't! It's you that complicates everything! What are you afraid about?"

I bit my lip and looked away, heavy pearls of tears rolled down my cheeks.

"I'm afraid – afraid, so afraid that all of this will be forgotten when I leave – so afraid that my love will be unrequited – so afraid that I'll lose you!"

Kakashi's eyes widened, he was stunned of my statement and his sudden response was to crush his lips on mine.

I protested, slamming my fists against him and struggling to push him off. It was impossible. His warm body radiated through my jail uniform to my skin, sending sparks down my spine. The longer his lips kissed and caressed my own, the more my will to resist ceased. The reality that he longed for me so much caused me to give into his kissing and into my rushing feelings. He kissed me so gently and caringly that it made me feel dizzy. This embraced my heart with this fluttering warmth emitting from his body and his kiss.

Suddenly he tightened his kissing; overwhelming me with his passion and his hands began to slither away from my face, brushing down along my neck gently. However, as his hand drove over my chest, I torn my lips away from his kissing and gasped in panic, pushing his hands off of me. Kakashi instantly stopped and brusquely apologized:

"Sorry Sara, I-I didn't mean to scare you - I'm sorry – I-I…"

I clasped my arms over my chest; my cheeks were bright red with my head turned away from him. I didn't know why I reacted like this, was I still resisting or was it fear or reason? Kakashi moved off of me and lay beside me on his sides. The silence was stifling. I felt his gaze observing me intently. Instead of turning over to him, I rolled to my side with my back facing him and covering my mouth, shocked about what just happened. My heart was pounding so strongly, what was wrong with me? Shouldn't I be enjoying this, since without a doubt he loves me? Why resisting, why hesitating and why this fear? What's going on, why am I so stressed? Is it his closeness that makes me panic? Or is it simply the first time that a man got this close to me? The very idea sent a darker shade over my cheeks and I covered my entire face. It must be that!

Abruptly I felt his warmth behind me and my entire body became rigid. When his arm laced around my stomach, I twitched nervously and turned even redder with my system fluttering excitingly. I bit my lip sharply, to restrain a gasp when his bare chest made contact with my back and I felt his breath against the back of my head. My body was going to explode soon!

"Don't be afraid, I'm not going to force you…" he whispered soothingly, but I still remained stiff.

I loved him so much and I wanted to be close to him, but something in me was making me hesitate. Kakashi sighed and brought me closer to him.

"Is it because I hurt you so much that you aren't letting me get closer to you?"

I shook my head brusquely without opening my mouth. The words were stuck in my throat.

"Then what is troubling you?" he questioned me, while placing feather light kisses on the back of my head and trailing down to my ears.

My whole body tensed up and I bit my lip even harder.

"Am I your first?" he whispered gently in my ears and as a result I abruptly shoved his arm away and backed away from him.

It sounded too embarrassing to hear him say this. Anyway he had several occasions that proved to him that I literally chicken out in such situations. Kakashi once again sighed, but this time with disappointment.

"Like I said before, I won't force you if you don't want to get close, however…" he paused.

"I want you to know that I love you more than life itself. I would sacrifice my life for you." He announced this time more serious and confident.

I slowly turned around to him and looked at him, a gap separated us.

"Why do you love me? Why would you sacrifice your life for my sake? Why?"

Kakashi smiled at me tenderly, despite that my question was stupid and obvious.

"I love you for your considerate and caring nature. Boldly you stand up for your beliefs and fight injustice and overcome any obstacles. However your cuteness makes me want to kiss you, hug you and touch you. Because I love you I would risk anything, even my life, to be with you, be close to you and protect you." He told me calmly with a sincere smile.

"However I can understand if you don't want me to get close to you, after all I only caused so much pain to you and it's logical if you don't trust me for the moment. I think it's better if I let you sleep tonight, I believe you are exhausted..." he added with a calm and comprehensive voice and decided to pull away, not until I prevented him from standing on his feet.

I had shifted my head and locked my lips to his, while covering his hand that was on the wooden floor with my hand. I wanted him! I won't run away this time, I'll show him how much I love him! I grasped his wrists and wrenched him down with me to the floor; I cupped his face and kissed him with passion. His taste was just so intoxicating and addictive! Kakashi couldn't respond to my kissing, either because he was too surprised or confused. However he pulled his face away and I followed his head, trying to capture his lips again.

"Sar-mh,wha-mh, are you-mh doing?" he questioned me during my kisses.

I pulled away; my finger traced his lips longingly.

"I want you tonight."

Kakashi was so startled by my statement that he simply stared at me speechlessly.

"You have no idea how long I've been waiting for this." I whispered than took over his lips once more and laced my arms around his neck and pulled him back down.

Still he wasn't responding and promptly he tore his lips from my own and looked at me with an earnest face.

"Are you sure it is what you want Sara?"

I nodded and still unconvinced Kakashi continued, verifying if I wasn't kidding or feeling forced,

"You know there is no turning back."

"I'm aware of that." I reassured Kakashi and still he looked at me, hesitating.

Feeling annoyed, I clasped my legs around his waist and brought him even closer to me. It sent a shockwave through Kakashi and I and he stared at me.

"You want this as much as I want it."

Kakashi was somehow grasping the situation, yet he was so disbelieved of what was happening.

"Tell me that I am hallucinating." He muttered staring blankly at me.

I chuckled and smiled tenderly at him, my hand caressed his cheek in which he responded immediately by closing his eyes and enjoying the sensation.

"You aren't, Kakashi. It's really happening." I reassured him gently and he opened his eyes.

Absolute relief washed over him, his eyes sparkled with tears of happiness and he couldn't help himself from smiling broadly. Instantly he captured my lips and poured out his entire love and passion over me until dawn.


	41. Chapter 40

**Here is another chapter, hope you love it and I really really thank you for all your reviews. R&R love you all very much o(^0^)o

* * *

CHAPTER FOURTY**

- **The farewell and the family reunion **-

I woke up to the sound of the birds chirping and to the sun light blinding my face. The warmth that I felt the whole night was gone. I opened my eyes and saw that the space beside me was empty. I sat bolt up, glancing alarmingly around me. Kakashi's clothes and shinobi equipment were gone. I looked down on my body and with a shriek covered up my chest with the blanket that had been draped over me. Everything came back to my mind. I turned brick red. I covered my mouth, somewhat shocked.

"I-he-we-last night? …Oh my God!" I sputtered frantically, clutching my hair at the horrific truth.

"I DID IT WITH HIM!" I muttered with horror and dropped back to the so-called mattress made of several layers of blankets.

I covered my red face. No wonder I felt a bit fuzzy and in pain this morning. I buried my head even deeper under the covers, the memory from last night flashed in front of my eyes and I could feel its effects on my body. All his touches were registered on my body, of course pleasant yet extremely vivid ones. I remember all his facial expressions, the details of his body…STOP THINKING ABOUT IT!!!! I should have died of nosebleed by now! Kakashi was so damn SEXY!!!! And I simply cannot believe that I, that I, that I… KYYAAAAAAA!!! I rolled around like a hyper active kid, who's finally got the present that she has been waiting for her entire life! I giggled excitingly and rolled around underneath the blankets; however I stopped still and closed my eyes. I could remember everything, his smell, his taste and how his skin felt. He was the most handsome man I ever met.

Then I heard the sound of wood creaking and the sound of wood scraping against another. That surely was Kakashi. I pretended to sleep. The floorboards creaked under each of his footsteps and it drew nearer to the mattress until it ceased completely. I knew he was observing me and finally I felt him kneel down beside. I held my breath, my heart hammered like wild. His hand touched the blanket and he pulled it gently down, revealing my head and my bare shoulders. I had to contain myself and pretend to be deeply sleeping, otherwise…Well, uhm, anyway I am too embarrassed to face him after what happened last night…

All of a sudden, Kakashi gently pushed away my hair and began placing kisses along my neck, down to my shoulders. My heart jumped to my throat. This guy is taking advantage of me while sleeping; he's going to get in trouble!

"Go away…jerk." I muttered sleepily and yawned and grabbed the blanket and brought it up to my chin, pushing Kakashi away.

There was a moment of silence, I tried my best to contain my laugh, either he was going to laugh or was offended. Suddenly he withdrew and he made no sound, only there was some ruffling of clothes and placing of objects on the wooden floor. I pulled the blanket over my head. Can't he just disappear for a moment! I wanna get dressed!! I turned over underneath the blanket where the noise came from and took a calming deep breath.

However the calm didn't come, literally a storm raged when Kakashi snuck underneath the blanket and lay down on his sides, just in front of me. Gently he laced his arm around my back and pulled me closer to him. When I came into contact with his skin, I gritted my teeth. THAT IDIOT IS NAKED AS WELL!!!

"You know, I saw through your acting Sara." Mentioned Kakashi casually.

I didn't move a muscle and kept on pretending to be asleep. Kakashi chuckled. He began to trail his finger along my back and suddenly he stopped and tickled my sides instead. I broke out in giggles, trying to fight off Kakashi's hands. He laughed as well and we rolled around underneath the blankets.

"Okay, okay, ha ha ha ha ha, I give up, I give up!" I laughed and Kakashi stopped tickling.

We lay next to each other and all of a sudden I was instantly aware of our nudity and turned my back on him.

"Anyway, what are you doing here? Weren't you dressed up before?" I barked nervously with my face brick red.

Kakashi chuckled and moved closer to me.

"Are you embarrassed?"

"About what?"

"About the fact that we are naked?"

"N-n-n-no not at all, he he!"

I pulled the blankets down to get some fresh air and there lay Kakashi, his confident smile with the mischief sparkling in his eyes. I brought the covers up to my chest and he came closer to me and I backed further away from him.

"You know, it was a fun last night." Said Kakashi cheerfully and I turned even redder.

"I seriously got a different impression about you now; you are one tigress in bed."

I covered my ears and shook my head.

"Stop that! I don't wanna hear about what happened last night!"

"Why not? It's one of our best memories."

"How can you be sure if it is ONE of MY best memories?"

Immediately I regretted that I ever said that, because Kakashi came up to me, his torso looming over me with the mischief written all over his face.

"Firstly last night you wouldn't get enough of me and secondly it's your first time, which makes it special and memorable to you."

I turned redder and suddenly Kakashi changed from his playboy nature to his cheerful attitude.

"Anyway today we got all the time in the world to explore each other." He announced cheerfully and jumped on me.

From outside the house, you could hear my protests, telling Kakashi to stop it and let me out of bed, however within some minutes it was completely silent.

The spring breeze blew through the forest, rustling its leaves and scaring the birds from the trees. This is definitely a memory worth keeping.

* * *

It was already dusk when we got fully dressed in our clothes. Constantly when Kakashi observed me and when I would notice it, he would smile tenderly at me and I would return a shy smile. We practically behaved like kids who did some mischief. Kakashi really had a sweet side about him; he helped me up to my feet and gave me his second pair of clothes, which I now wore. He kept a smile on his face, which made my heart flutter and long for him. When he helped me up, I crushed my lips against his and pulled back before his eagerness to respond kicked in.

"Hey, give me some time to kiss you back." Protested Kakashi with a pout.

I chuckled and shook my head.

"You kissed me more than enough already."

Swiftly Kakashi laced his arm around my lower back and instinctively brought me close enough that his lips locked with mine. I placed my palms on his chest; I could feel his hammering heart beat. No matter how many times we made love, my love for him never ceased and grew stronger the closer we came. I still couldn't believe that we were a couple. I a human woman and he an anime character. It was just too good to be true. He was handsome and such a caring person, this new side of his which remained concealed throughout the time, made me love him ever more. Kakashi pulled back and rested his forehead against mine, grinning at me. I never witnessed him so joyful throughout my stay or even while watching the Naruto episodes. It seemed like my staying made the surroundings so realistic that it made me believe that I was back in my world. The thought about my world made me sulk and Kakashi looked at me with concern.

"What's wrong Sara?"

"Kakashi, can you do me a favour?"

Kakashi nodded without hesitating, while uttering "anything".

"Can you hug me?"

Kakashi looked at me with doubt, as if my question was strange. He complied without a word and hugged me. I closed my eyes to bathe in his comforting warmth. I love him so much. I wish I could stay here, live with him until the end of time. It seemed possible, but both of us knew I couldn't stay. In part because I missed my family and I know that both of us will suffer. My arms slithered up his back and I pressed myself closer to him and hugged him back.

"I love you so much." I muttered emotionally with the tears brimming in my eyes.

Kakashi held me closely to his body and whispered.

"I love you too."

Kakashi pulled back to look at me, he raised my chin with his finger.

"Why are you crying Sara?"

I gave him a watery smile.

"I guess I'm homesick, after all I've been several months away and I believe they miss me too."

Kakashi placed his hand on my cheek and gave me a compassionate smile.

"I understand you, it's a sign for you to go home and I know how to send you back."

I stared at him with wide eyes.

"What? You know how?"

Kakashi nodded.

"Apparently while trying out my new technique I brought you here in the first place."

"No way?! But, how is that possible?" I spluttered with disbelief and Kakashi just shrugged.

"I don't know how it happened, I only know that my new technique called the Mangekyou Sharingan can open dimensions and send people through them. I could send you back."

I thought over his statement.

"How could a portal be created between my world an yours? It's just too strange and unrealistic." I muttered pensively and Kakashi interrupted my thoughts by cupping my cheeks.

"Well thanks to this mishap, I met you that I think counts the most." He told me with delight and he was ready to kiss me once again.

However all of a sudden, Kakashi spun his head to the side, his face directed to the door. I could tell his body became rigid and his face turned grave and intense.

"We have to leave immediately! I sense several chakara presences nearing." He stated without his gaze leaving the door and broke away from me to gather his things.

"Who are they?" I questioned him, my voice strangled by anxiety.

"Most likely Anbus, they must have realized your escape." He said while running back and forth in the room to gather his things and stuff them into his bag.

"How many are they?"

"Five of them."

"Five of them?!"

"Yep, obviously you are so irresistible that you even lure Anbus."

"That's not funny, Kakashi! I'm serious!" I shouted uncontrollably.

Realizing that I shouted at him, I slapped my hand over my mouth in guilt. Kakashi covered his face with his mask again and slung his bag over his back and then he walked over to me. He rested his hands on my shoulders and gave me a cheerful face.

"Don't worry. Like I told you, I will protect you."

I stared at him, moved by his words and before I could show some appreciation, Kakashi had directed me out of the house. We stood on the porch. The sinister forest combined with the restless wind, the dark starless sky and gloomy moon emitted a menacing atmosphere. I could sense that something bad was going to happen and for the first time I felt afraid. I backed to Kakashi, clutching the sleeve of his shirt and hiding behind him. I was terribly aware of how naked and pitifully vulnerable I was without my powers.

"Sara, it's alright-

-No it's not alright! For the love of God, I lost all my abilities Kakashi! I'm pitifully weak, I cannot fight anymore!" I interrupted him anxiously.

Kakashi rested a reassuring hand on my hand that clutched his sleeve.

"They won't fight us, don't forget that I was also part of the Anbu, I know how to fool them."

I felt a bit relieved and released Kakashi's sleeve.

"So you lost all your abilities?" he inquired.

"Everything, obviously the demon's powers were the source of my strength." I told him.

He removed his bag from his back and handed to me.

"I'll have to ask you to carry my bag, while I carry you on my back."

To protest would be suicidal, Kakashi's stern and cold facial expression, warned me not to act foolishly. I agreed without complaining. Kakashi kneeled down to let me climb on his back. He heaved himself up and last minute adjusted me better on his back.

"Hold on tight, I'll be running very fast." He warned me and I complied.

He dashed off from the house, running down the hill and than jumping until he gained higher ground to the boughs of the trees. I wish Kakashi and I would have more time together, there was so much to talk about.

"They are gaining up on us." Kakashi cursed and sped up his pace.

Dread bubbled in the pit of my stomach, what if we get caught or worse killed? I don't want this to end like this!

"Don't worry Sara, just rely on me, I promise that nothing is going to happen to you!" he stated sternly.

"I'm not worried about my safety, but about yours!" I declared and Kakashi gave a chuckle.

"You shouldn't worry about me; I've endured a lot in my life. The only thing that would kill me is if you get killed."

I was startled from his words that I gave him a kiss on his clothed cheek, which made Kakashi nearly slip off the bough.

"Sara! Don't kiss me while I'm jumping otherwise we both die of dislocated necks!" he scolded me and I had to muffle my chuckle.

"I'm serious Sara! If you do that one more time than I can assure that we'll make love right under the noses of the Anbus!"

I turned brick red and was about to say that I didn't mind about it, but judging by Kakashi's intense and serious face, it was best that I keep my mouth shut this time.

Kakashi took up his pace and both of us stopped speaking to each other during the travel. Despite that he was carrying me and I felt close to him, with each step, each breath, each heart beat, the distance between Kakashi and I expanded. I knew this was going to be my very last travel with Kakashi and maybe the very last time I would be with him. I had to berate myself to stay real about this fact, I would return to my world and everything would be back to normal with Kakashi forgotten somewhere in the back of my mind. There was no turning back. It was time to leave this place. Kakashi made an abrupt turn, making me shriek and cling on to him even tighter.

"What are you doing? You nearly made me slide off!"

Kakashi gave a broken chuckle underneath his pants.

"Those punks are gaining on us - have to change direction."

I noticed we were heading deeper into the forest and most likely getting closer to the border of Konoha. Then all of a sudden Kakashi burst through the trees and encountered a cliff, he gathered speed and jumped over the cliff to land. I clung onto him and gave a horrified yelp. The gap between the two edges was at least four meters! It was so strange, my natural reflex was to scream and cling onto Kakashi with my life. With ease he landed on the other side and dashed further into the forest.

"It's the first time I ever saw you doubt my skill." He uttered with amusement and I slapped his head with embarrassment.

"Shut up! I don't think you'd feel any better if you would be in my place!"

Kakashi gave one of his ridiculous chuckles and shook his head.

We began to near a rocky path which led higher up into the hills and which signalled that we were approaching a very familiar place.

"Actually where are we going?"

It took a moment for Kakashi to answer, because of the coarse path.

"Obviously I am trying to bring you to safe ground so that I can send you back home."

It was not so nice to hear that coming from his mouth, he had taken his teacher mode again and seemed willing to lecture if I argue back, but I didn't and neither did the tone of his voice convince me that he was willing to lecture me. The atmosphere was too tense and uncomfortable. I could tell he felt bitter about this situation, but it was inevitable to revert this happening. I was bound to go back sooner or later and no matter what time it would have been, I would have approved the same emotions. Love is painful!

A bitter atmosphere descended upon us, both of us were preoccupied with our own thoughts. Then Kakashi started to chuckle and he shook his head as if he was remembering something ridiculous.

"What's so funny?" I questioned him eagerly and he calmed himself down.

"You know, I don't know how many times I've been trying to give you hints about my feelings and so many times you ignored it. It made me insane. You are such a dense woman – AU!"

I had smacked Kakashi's head.

"Well you! I've been giving you hints for so long and you rejected them bluntly! Remember, remember! Last time, when I asked you what you regarded me as? You said you regarded me as a student, a precious friend, like that isn't a rejection! And not to mention, you played around a lot with me and at the end when it became too intimate you slithered out!"

"Ah, be quiet you dense woman! Do you think I can be spontaneous about my feelings, huh? If you forgot I used to be your guardian and your teacher, love is forbidden to exist in such a relationship. Don't you think I suffered as well?!" he argued back sharply, silencing me into a speechless and disbelieved state.

"You don't know how much I had to hold myself back, that is why I slithered out before I would lose control over my feelings –

-Than why didn't you at least tell me about your feelings? Why did you keep me waiting, I suffered too!" I interrupted him briskly and he heaved a deep sigh.

"You cannot understand this situation; you aren't a teacher and most certainly not a shinobi! You don't understand the fact to be entrusted with a mission that not only your reputation depends on, but your sanity and your life. I have broken so many rules which should cost my head gear…"

Kakashi jumped and dodged some of the boulders and continued after a grunt, his speech.

"However despite all the rules I broke, my reputation that I dragged through the mud, I've experienced some thing better, valuable than my entire life…"

He turned his head aside, his eye peering into my face; he had a wrinkle on his mask showing that he was smiling.

"The time I've spent with you, is valuable above everything…"

I was so moved about his sincerity and his tenderness. There were no lies; he shone so brightly with love. He focused his attention back on the rocky path. I laced my arms around his throat and rested my head on his shoulder

"I lied. I was also confused." I confessed,

"Because I come from a different dimension, I am pressured to be unattached to this place in order to avoid the pain of separation when I return home. I am afraid to hurt, afraid to be attached, afraid to love, because I know that it all the time ends in pain. Like Steve, he just died before I could fully love him. However it's impossible to go through life without love, I never felt such a strong attraction to a man like you. It's like we were destined for each other."

One of Kakashi's hand placed on my arm with reassurance, his thumb caressed gently my forearm.

"I believe in that destiny too that's why I cannot let you go."

His hand gripping my forearm quivered. I was struck with relief that he felt the same, but also struck by sorrow about the hard reality that soon I was going to return to my world and most likely never see him again. I decided to elevate the atmosphere and diverted from the depressing topic:

"Come on we shouldn't sulk about it, let's take advantage of our last moments together." I started with a cheerful voice and instantly my sentence pricked Kakashi's awareness.

"You should have told me you weren't satisfied, than I would have done better."

I took me a moment to realize what he meant and when it made "click" I slapped the back of his head exclaiming a "Eww!"

"I didn't mean that you hentai! Geez! You are only full of THAT!"

"I mean who wouldn't react to this, especially if you're on my back."

"Ok, Kakashi put me down NOW!" I ordered him firmly and was trying to wiggle off of his back.

"I was just joking – why you get so quickly uptight, although you-

-SHUT IT already! I get the point, I get the point! Obviously you just don't know how women generally react to such stuff, okay? I am one of them that is still in a state of shock and disbelief!"

"State of shock?!" repeated Kakashi horrified as if a boulder had dropped on him.

A depressing and heavy aura hung above Kakashi, it looked like it was going to rain over him in any minute.

"Was I that bad?" he mumbled miserably.

I groaned, realizing the stuff I blabbered and instantly searched for an apology.

"Ah man! I didn't –I-I swear – I didn't mean it like that, really."

It still didn't work, my nervousness made the atmosphere worse, Kakashi looked even more miserable than before. The blush covered my entire face and I leaned my head closer to his ear and shyly whispered something into his ear. When I finished whispering he had an immediate surge of energy and he kicked off the ground to jump or run. He was so cheerful. Obviously the stuff I whispered to him powered him up so much that he couldn't resist grinning like a little boy. I had to laugh as well, despite of the stuff I whispered to him.

I don't how many times I could say this but Kakashi is a person that you could instantly fall in love with, his smile simply makes you melt down! He's just too perfect for my eyes.

"Of course what did I expect, I am the pro at it, impossible to disappoint any lady." He boasted and immediately I pinched his ear lobe with my finger tips.

"Don't you mention any other "lady" in front of me ever again, get that!" I pinched his ear lobe harder and he gave a whine.

"Okay, okay! I got it, stop getting jealous over my ridiculous jokes!"

I released his ear lobe and he grumbled about his sore ear lobe. The path evened out and Kakashi's pace was slowing down. I could feel that he was getting tiered.

"Kakashi, I think we should take a break-

-We can't! The Anbus are still behind us and we are very close to the place I want to go." He stated sternly and picked up his pace once again.

"Please, Kakashi! Don't over do yourself." I told him with concern, worried that he might collapse from exhaustion.

"Don't worry, we are closer than you think." He reassured me.

Indeed he was right, when he burst into a narrow open space with a river winding through it he halted immediately. He lowered me down and I observed the area with a feeling of familiarity.

"Do you remember this place?" he questioned me and I looked at him and back to the area and walked closer to the river.

It's true that there was a familiarity to this place, but from where? Kakashi came beside me and laced his arm around my lower back.

"It's the place where we met the first time."

"You mean when you fished me out of the river?"

Kakashi nodded and instinctively his hand intertwined with mine and we looked like were about to dance.

"This is all real Sara, I know my world doesn't exist in yours, but all that's happened between us was real."

He leaned his forehead against mine.

"I want to be frank about various things that have been bothering me."

"Go ahead, I'm listening." I encouraged him and he sighed.

His eyes never left mine.

"I didn't fall in love with you at first sight; it was later when I got to know you better."

"Aha, go on."

"And, well, uhh, don't get mad at me, but I did taking advantage of you, some of the time."

My eyes nearly popped out of their sockets.

"You what?! When?!" I repeated with a mixture of horror and disbelief.

Kakashi chuckled nervously, he saw me growing a scowl on my face.

"You recall all the incidents?"

"The embarrassing ones, especially involved with YOU?"

Kakashi nodded nervously and observed me cautiously.

"Well, they were all planned."

I watched him agape and pulled away from him, my face turning brick red.

"Y-y-you mean, ALL of them, even the one incident where you were drunk and mistook me for a prostitute?"

Kakashi halted in his words and gave nervous face.

"This incident was a true mistake, a careless moment."

Struck with a realization, I looked down my body and with horror briskly clasped my arms around my frame.

"Oh my God! So you DID actually take advantage of me, you lecher! What else did you do to me!? Answer me!" I demanded sharply and marched up to him.

Kakashi held his palms high in front of him, to reveal a nervous chuckle.

"Well-

"Well what? What else did you do? Other than kiss me? Did you touch me or beyond that!?" I demanded impatiently, grabbing the collar of his vest threateningly.

"Don't mistake me for such a person! I never took advantage of you while you were unconscious - although I was tempted to do that – but never did! I know it would be unfair!"

"So what did you do?" I gave him a shake.

"I-uh-well, you remember the time you hurt your abdomen and I was bandaging you?"

"Vaguely."

"Yea, because you were in part drunk from the poison and well, you actually started kissing me and before we went further you passed out."

His statement silenced me immediately, I merely stared at him.

"There was this other incident, while you were drunk, it was back at the Fuhei mansion when you were officially engaged the whole clan celebrated. I brought you to your room and well I started kissing you."

I was shocked about myself that my drunken side unconsciously betrayed my feelings to Kakashi. No wonder he acted some times strange and even unfamiliarly nice.

"Even in the tent, while you had a dream of Steve, you mistook me for him and kissed me."

My face turned so red that I had to look away. No wonder that guy was so eager to get close to me, not to mention the way he looked at me and how much he flirted and teased me! I admire his control over his feelings at such moments, even myself I don't think I could have coped.

"I believe this cleared up some of your suspicions about my behaviour?"

I nodded without looking at him and he approached me.

"And I know you tried taking advantage of me once, the time when I returned to the room drunk, you gave me a hickey and I believe this wasn't the only time you haven't touched me."

I sighed defeated with a red face. What else can you expect, if you love a person that much, your feelings just rush through you and you do the most embarrassing and stupid things in the world, even if it is taking advantage while the person is asleep.

"Let me remind you we're both the criminals, consider yourself lucky that I was only focused on you."

"Still it could have been far more interesting if you had assaulted me earlier on, than I believe we would have had more time, for each other." Kakashi flirted with that mischief glinting in his eyes and I responded by rolling my eyes.

"Well to some extent I was waiting for your first move, but you were so hesitant, I had to do the first move and it's normally the opposite. Anyway why didn't you do the first move?"

"I did, but you rejected me several times already, how am I supposed to know if you would accept me? I know that you are very unpredictable."

"You too are very unpredictable in what regards feelings."

Kakashi chuckled and laced his arms around my lower back and brought me closer to him and he leaned his forehead against mine. The happiness was evident in his face.

"Finally it's over with the discretion, nothing can stop our love for each other." He spoke with care and tenderness.

My arms slithered around the back of his neck and I replied with an affectionate smile.

"I think I would have gone insane if I hadn't expressed my feelings for you."

"So would I." he agreed and took one of my hands and placed a gentle kiss in my palm.

His tenderness always surprised me and gave my heart a leap. I thought I knew him well enough to read his movements, but like I said before he was unpredictable. He still was a mystery to me, which made him so attractive to my eyes.

When I was about to reach for his mask, he briskly tore his head away to look behind him. Sudden awareness and concern dominated his face.

"They'll arrive in several minutes now." He mentioned his voice sounding urgent.

He turned his head to me, his anxious face scanning mine.

"I must send you back immediately-

I cut him straight off with my lips, cupping his cheeks. I pulled back before he could react. I caressed his face gently with the tears brimming in my eyes.

"I'll love you forever."

Abruptly Kakashi pulled me into an overwhelming embrace.

"Sara, I promise I'll get you so please wait for me!" he spluttered with desperation with the emotions strangling his voice.

Overwhelmed by the reality I hugged him back, overcome by the pain to leave him.

"I promise, Kakashi, I promise to wait!"

The tears rolled down my cheeks, the pain was unbearable! I wanted to stay and endure all the consequences in order to stay by his side! He promptly pulled back, to crush his lips on mine. His lips scorched mine with all his feelings towards me. I craved for the distance between us to seal forever. I could feel that he desired me so strongly that he even wanted to prevent me from leaving, but if I don't leave both of us might die. I pulled back, looking into his sparkling and intense eyes filled with emotions.

"Please s-

He cut off my speech with his lips. His lips caressed, nibbled and his tongue lashed desperately and urgently over my lips. He was desperately trying to savour the last moment between us, so did I but the fact that the Anbus were approaching, couldn't let me enjoy this moment entirely. I pulled away from Kakashi's lips and I uttered with sobs.

"Please, I want to stay by your side! I don't care what consequences I have to bear, but I want to stay beside you forever!"

Kakashi shook his head, his watery eyes looked at me, clearly he also wanted me to stay, but reasons told him to reject my statement.

"No you can't…You have to go back, it's the only way for you to be safe."

He cupped my cheeks kissed me even desperately than before. I would always pull back to signal him to stop and send me back, but his lips kept on catching mine. He was anxiously trying to register the taste of my lips on his body and in-between the kisses he uttered:

"I - love – you."

He would than pull back, let his fingers caress my face for the last time and when his fingers drove over my lips, he briskly hugged me with his lips kissing my neck. Startled by his directness, I clung onto him for support with my cheeks blushing and my heart racing. His lips felt so hot against my skin, his breath scorched my skin sending this thrilling sensation down my spine. Against my neck he whispered.

"This is a proof of my promise." Now he pulled back, encountering me with intensively overwhelming eyes.

I briskly pulled his entire mask down that covered his neck and marked him with my lips.

"That is also my promise."

The tears rolled down my cheeks heavily. Kakashi tore his head away from me again, he was so alarmed that he pulled his head gear upwards to reveal his Sharingan eye. He held both of my hands, his Sharingan eye was closed.

"Wait for me, despite of the distance, the time that passes and the pain. I promise to get you!" he pledged with determination and his Sharingan eye began to open steadily.

When it was fully opened, I was struck with paralysis and the impression that time had stopped. Kakashi's Sharingan eye seemed to draw me into it; the dots in his Sharingan eye spun so quickly like hypnosis and sucked me in. With my last strength I shouted.

"Farewell, Kakashi, I LOVE YOU!!!!"

I felt being sucked inside a tube; my body was banged around and compressed into an inhuman size that nearly made me suffocate. I yelled with pain, but the transition through the portal dumb my voice and numbed my senses. In flashes of blazing light, I soared through empty space with my sight gradually fading. In no time all my senses numbed and I became unconscious.

* * *

I woke to the sound of the roaring wind as it rustled through the grasses. Birds chirped and the bugs buzzed. I could faintly hear the traffic below. However I felt the summery beams of sun, shining down on me, warming me instantly and embracing me. The smell of bitter grass lingered in my nose. Then all of a sudden a heavy and furry thing assaulted me, its ragging breaths hovering over my face and it begun to lick my face with its warm slobbery tongue. I opened my eyes and encountered with a shriek, a chocolate Labrador with its moist nose and dangling tongue looming over me, greeting me with a delightfully face and a bark. I shrunk away and covered my face defensively. The dog waddled its tail excitedly and was pacing about and barking playfully. I still wasn't recovered from the startle and shivered in fear. Out of nowhere a voice called with exasperation.

"You old thing, what did you do now?"

I could hear a person treading in quick and angered strides to the place I sat. From beyond the high grass, a tall and slender young man in his twenties with pitch black hair, his eyes stared at me with astonishment.

"Oh, hello, did she bother you?"

Still frozen with disbelief and fright, I stared at him blankly. I was back in my world finally. He came to me and held out an inviting hand.

"Let me help you up." He proposed friendly and I gave my hand and he pulled me up.

My legs felt wobbly and he caught a better grip of me, by wrapping his arm around my waist.

"What happened to you? You're awkwardly dressed."

I scanned my appearance and realized that I wore the Jounin outfit, which was too large for me and looked rather stupid in the real world, like a cheap cosplay costume. I stared into the young man's face. There was something about him that resembled Kakashi, but I didn't know what. I raised my trembling hand and rested it on his face, which made him respond with a confused and surprised face.

"Kakashi…" I mumbled incoherently with my eyes brimming with tears.

The young man, noticed my troubled state and begun to question me.

"What's your name?"

Instantly I realized my hand against his cheek and briskly pulled it away and I looked away.

"My name is Sara."

"Sara…?"

"Sarah Hanshey." I completed and all of a sudden a gasp escaped from him.

"You're-you're Sarah Hanshey, THE Sarah Hanshey who's gone missing for several months?!" he spluttered with disbelief.

I looked at him with confusion. "Gone missing for several months" what does he mean? A smile of relief and delight swept over his face.

"Come on I'll bring you back home, your family must be dead worried." He suggested and took me along.

We walked along a stony path that descended the green hills down to my hometown. I was moved to tears to see my hometown again, those green hills of the countryside, the forest, the houses and its inhabitants. The young man remained throughout the travel down to my hometown, a great support. He had such similarities to Kakashi, his character was gentle and friendly like Kakashi's and his slender face with those auburn eyes was unique and handsome. He took forth his mobile phone and dialled up a number. He phoned obviously to the police and soon was we reached the foot of the hill, several police cars and an ambulance were grouped down below with their lights blazing and blinking. The sun was setting behind the hill of forest in the east and the blue summery sky began to colour to a pink. Everything went so quickly I was taken by the ambulance, which laid me out onto a portable bed and put me away into the ambulance car. I watch this happen without reacting to the slightest; I was rushed to the hospital and put asleep.

I woke up sooner than expected and was heart-warmingly greeted by my entire family at the hospital. Even the young man was amongst my family, he stood in the back, observing the moving family reunion. I don't know how much tears my family and I spilled for each other. Everybody was so delighted, so relieved to see me; my parents held me so tightly like they never did before. They repeated how much they loved me and I responded by telling them that I missed them and loved them equally. I couldn't describe such a moving moment, it was like I was overflowing with emotions with longing for my family and that finally I was back home. Kakashi was pushed out of my thoughts, only the joy to see my family again was important to me. The family moment gradually ended and my parents went to thank the young man that found me. He scratched the back of his head modestly, embarrassed of my parents tons of thanks to have found me. His body language was the spitting image of Kakashi's. Was it really him or did my imagination played tricks on me? I shook my head; of course he cannot come to my world, stupid me! He's the one who brought me to Konoha and send me back. The young man came to my bed and smiled at me very friendly. Before he could say a word, I quickly interjected:

"Thanks for bringing me back; I don't know how much I can thank you."

The young man smiled with pleasure.

"It was my pleasure; by the way my name is Justin."

I took his hand and shook it, like it was our first meeting and we exchanged a smile. He pulled out a business card and handed to me.

"Call me, when you're on your feet again." He instructed and with appreciation I accepted his card.

He then left my hospital room. It was actually the last time that I ever saw him again. I ended up never calling him, because I already had a person in my heart that left me a valuable memory and a reminder on the right side of my neck.


	42. EPILOGUE

**Hiyaaaaaaaaaaaaaa^^ ****I am sorry the chapter didn't come out sooner, but I am juggling around with School studies, my engagment (wooo hoooo!!!!) and other personal things here and there. ****This, my dear fellow readers, is the last chapter of "Beyond Fiction". Thank you for all your reviews, your support and your awesome compliments and encouragments until now. It's been a wonderful time writing this story and it has pleased me greatly that it had such a positive impact. I really, really thank you guys and I love you all^^

* * *

**

**- Epilogue -**

How many years passed until the day I was reunited with my family again? Five years? Or was it six or more? All I know is that now I am 25 years old, a certified interior designer and enjoying a cosy and successful carrier life. Yep. The trip to Konoha left a great impression in my life; it is through the teachings that I managed to transform into the person I have become and was yearning for, an active and professionally successful person.

I am content with everything, my job, my salary, my talent, my social life, everything. Life is going smooth. I literally grew, not only physically but mentally. I've lost interest in Animes and anything that is related to it. To put it simple, I have become plainly realistic. I think it comes when you age, but I must admit that sometimes I do have a peek back into my childhood and teenage hood. Life was so carefree and fun at that time, now as you are maturing you become conscious of your responsibility over your life and your job. It's awfully annoying but you have to persist.

Now back to the time at the hospital, after this I changed in the courses of years. I became open and daring. I socialised incredibly well that I have won many friends and to my dislike won many admirers. Each day I was hopeful and optimistic that Kakashi was going to get me. I was always ready to leave and abandon everything behind me even my friends and my family. My love for Kakashi endured.

However like an idea that appears briskly and disappears quickly, my hope extinguished. In the first three years I was so hopeful, but gradually as the years dragged by loaded with intense studies, exams and other daily worries - I forgotten Kakashi. When it happened it shocked me into tears and gradually it became a habit - this was when I had to depart from my passion for Naruto for good. Yes indeed, I did spill a great deal of tears over the years, the pain of separation was unbearable and I begun accusing Kakashi for abandoning me. What else did I expect from an 18-19 year old kid and a guy of 26?! The anger forced me to abandon this hope for good and it left a hole in my heart which in the courses of the years never healed. The bitterness plagued me.

To separate myself for good from my teenage hood and those lingering feelings and memories, I rented out a flat in the main city, an hour and a half away from my home. This clearly marked that I had outgrown those childish feelings and hopes. Kakashi was abandoned and forgotten. He has become only a vague figment of my imagination.

I haven't revealed any of this to anybody neither to my family or my closest friends. I know if I would, I would be considered crazy and send to a madhouse immediately. I'll take that burden to my grave. It was hard to accept this. I was so lonely and depressed all those years.

Still today, I am feeling like that, which is why I increase my activity with my friends. However it was on one fateful night where everything turned upside down.

* * *

My old Uni-classmates invited me to go out with them. My closest friend, Carol came along with me. She was an energetic and eager young woman, on the hunt for hotty guys with sophisticated careers, typical. She had weaknesses for doctors, lawyers and even teachers. The weakness for teachers actually brought me and her together in the first place, since my first love was a teacher. Carol is the only person alive, to know about Kakashi, well not the complete truth, the half-truth. I disregarded the fact of Kakashi being an anime and all supernatural stuff involved in it. She has been a great comfort to me in most difficult times.

The group of ex-Uni students marched into one of the famous bars in the entire city. Despite that I hated such places, I went there to be with my friends and they did respect me for not drinking, which hadn't been the case several years before hand. As usual the atmosphere reeked of alcohol, smoking and drugs and the place was crowded. The tables were filled with drunken business men surrounded by half naked women, while on the bar stool sat depressed men and women or people desperate to find a partner. This place made me want to puke.

Unwillingly I followed the group of ex-uni students to an empty circular table and sat down on the sofas encircling the table. In no time beers were ordered and the drinking begun. Except for me and two other guys out of twenty, all were drinking, Carol as well. From the growing quantity of beer that everybody drank the more laughter and stupidity increased. Everybody planned to get extremely drunk tonight and make tonight a beautiful memory, while I sat beside them pretending to laugh and smile.

All of a sudden while everybody was in a drunken state, the joking and laughing evolved to a-round-of-confession-making. I was ready to slither out of this when my old uni-classmate called for me.

"Saraah, I got a confession to make to you – hicks -"

I had to sit back correctly into the sofa and turned my head to him with a forced smile.

"I loved you since the very beginning!" declared the guy strongly and the group surrounding us whooped and cheered.

"Me too!" jumped another male student.

"Me too!"

"Me too!"

"And me as well!"

I watched them with my smile twitching to a nervous frown. More cheers and whoops followed. More confessions poured out, which were either bizarre or completely random. The desire to run away from this place seemed close at any moment now. However I was held back, when a guy asked a question which made the entire table silence down.

"Sara, did you have a first love?"

Everybody spun their heads towards me, the eagerness shone in their faces especially in those of my admirers. I was looking at Carol for help, but as always she was a helpless case when drunk.

"Come on tell them." She encouraged me and the entire table clapped.

My face turned brick red and the entire table whooped when noticing it.

"He must have been somebody special if you are blushing." Teased one of the guys, which caught my immediate attention.

"Who are you?"

The table focused itself on the guy I was looking at. I never saw him before in my life.

The guy sitting next to the person I was staring at, patted the person beside him.

"This is Kyo Fukasa, one of my working colleagues. We met several years ago, he's from Japan."

A tiny detail attracted my immediate attention.

"You said his family name was Fukasa, right?"

Kyo looked at me and nodded.

"Yes it is my family name, why are you asking?"

I observed the young man, intently. He had a slender face with prominent cheek bones, his eyes were sharp, dark and penetrative and his head was decorated with messed up raven hair. He gave an impression of a sloppy person with a rotten character, perfect for a Yakuza. Yet there was this athletic and strong side of his and this mysterious aura, making him attractive and strangely...Very familiar.

"Did we ever meet before?" I questioned him with doubt and he leaned forward with a provocative smirk growing on his face and there was this familiar glint in his eyes.

"Maybe we did."

His body language shocked me. That glint in his eyes which usual expressed smutty thoughts, the smirk and that air of confidence seemed all too familiar. I opened my mouth and closed it; I didn't know what to say.

"I could have sworn that we met before!" I mumbled and scratched the back of my head, trying to remember desperately.

"Who cares if you did or not? Anyway, Sarah tell us about your first love!" interrupted one of my fellow ex-classmates and already everybody joined into cheering and clapping.

The Asian didn't urge me on like the others; instead he kept an indifferent look and observed me.

"Might as well tell them, don't you think?" suggested the Asian guy with his arms crossed over his chest.

The glint in his eyes gave my heart a lurch. Reflexively I reached for my heart and anxiously sunk into my thoughts. Why was my heart beating so fast for that total stranger, who I never met in my life?

"Come on Sarah, don't be stubborn, you cannot slither out from this, like you usually do." He mentioned once again with a confident attitude.

The last sentence struck me with suspicion and surprise, I stared at him blankly. Who the hell was he?! The sentences hit the nail without fail. I could have sworn I knew somebody talking like this, this typical overconfident and sloppy attitude.

"Tell us Sarah-Sarah-Sarah!" cheered one guy on and then the whole group joined in.

Without looking at the Asian, I raised my palms to show I was giving in.

"Okay, y'all win, I'll tell you." I gave in with a smile.

I kept my eyes down on the table and kept this remarkable smile on my face. Warmth enveloped my heart at the thought of him.

"I was at that time 18, a student and he was 26, a teacher."

The entire group whooped and cheered. The talks exchanged between my ex-uni students, made me blush and they even teased me, wondering how it happened.

"I never loved a man like this before-

-Did you have sex?" bluntly asked one of my male ex-classmates, which followed with a bombardment of the same question by the entire table.

Without looking at them my face turned brick red and I fumbled my fingers. The entire table broke out with even more cheers and whooping. Some patted my shoulders excitedly. I wished to disappear from this place for good; I was so embarrassed and humiliated!

"So are you with him?" asked the girls eagerly.

"And does he love you?" asked another girl and as a result the entire table silenced down to listen attentively.

I folded my hands and only looked at my hands.

"He promised me that he would get me…" I began, but my throat tightened emotionally so that my sentence was cut off.

I took a deep breath and restarted.

"He promised to get me. He-he-he promised me, but that-that…Bastard! He lied! He lied, he didn't-didn't come to fetch me, he ruthlessly abandoned me!" I croaked, the ball of emotions tightening the air passage to my lungs.

All of a sudden across the table, there was a commotion. The Asian guy was standing up, panting and staring at me intensely.

"He hasn't abandoned you! I know he loves you!" interjected the Asian defensively yet desperately.

The tears rolled down my cheeks and I stared at him with shock. Everybody at the table had gone quiet, even a large part of the bar as well. I was confused, what did he mean by this? However I was overwhelmed by emotions that as a response I shouted at him.

"How are you supposed to understand my pain? The pain of waiting seven years for a childish, foolish promise from that good-for-nothing man! Do you believe I can love him, after this? I cannot! I don't remember anything about him! He's just a painful memory which I desperately want to forget! I HATE that man, he destroyed my life!" I grabbed my things and dashed out of the bar into the cool night.

I heard the voices calling after me, but I couldn't hear them under my miserable sobs. I sprinted through the bustling streets. This pain, I cannot take it anymore! Will it please stop! Will it please let me in peace! I don't want to hurt no more, not for a pitiful, childish and imaginary promise made by an Anime figure! Damn, he never existed! All of this was imaginary; I must have been drugged and kidnapped! All of this never was real!

I burst into an empty park, which was known as the main botanical park of the entire city. Under the gloom of the full moon I staggered over to a bench and sunk in it, hunched with my face buried in my palms. My heart was in such pain, I wanted to drive a stake through it to stop the pain. I sobbed overcome by overwhelm with my entire figure trembling strongly. Please, God! Stop this pain, stop it from tearing me apart, stop it from preventing me to love…Please help me!

All of a sudden, I heard somebody approaching and I cocked my head and noticed Kyo, the Asian. He panted, he wiped his sweaty face with the back of his palm, and his eyes never once left me. He was also in an emotional state.

"What do you want? Go away! Leave me in peace!" I exclaimed furiously.

He disregarded my demand and approached me until he stood beside me.

"I won't leave like the last time! You'll have to hear me out!"

I looked at him with bewilderment and anger seething in me. I won't let a stranger lecture me what is right and wrong! I jumped up and readied my hand to slap him, but he caught a firm hold of my hand.

"No matter how much you reject me or hit me, I'll always come back for you." Told Kyo in a stern voice, his eyes staring deeply into mine and his presence approaching mine.

"What are you talking about?! Who the hell do you think you are?! I never met you in my entire life!" I shouted and tried slapping him with my other hand, but he caught it as well.

"I'm telling you the truth! You are the only person who knows me better than anybody else!"

I shook my head, trying to break free from his grip and I shouted at him.

"Stop it! Let go of me, otherwise I'll call the police!"

"Go ahead, Sarah! I'll still come for you, because I am the one who made the promise to you!"

My struggling immediately ceased and I stared at him…What?

For a moment I stared at him, was it really…NO! Impossible, he's from an Anime! This can never happen, not in real life! I wrenched myself away and I went into a fighting position, challenging and threatening him.

"Stay away from me you pervert, I warn you! I'm skilled with martial arts!"

This guy didn't show the slightest fear or alarm, he remained indifferent and walked toward me. I tried to strike him with my fist, but he caught it in his hand and the other soaring fist he caught it as well. Then I raised my leg to kick him but he fended off with his leg and the next kick of mine he repeated the same action.

"You still haven't learned. You're stubbornness and rebelliousness has been one of biggest pain in the asses during my teachings and our missions."

"I don't know what you are talking about! Obviously you got me mixed up with somebody else!"

"Oh no, Sarah, I am not mistaken. It's you that I've been looking for the past years."

I chuckled at this guy's pitiful attempt to woo me.

"Do you seriously think with those speeches, which you heard from me in the bar, will make me fall for your trap, you pervert!"

I back away from that stranger and I went into a serious fighting pose.

"I'll have to knock you out and deliver you to the police myself!" I declared and attacked full throttle with my clenched fist ready to punch him.

However all too suddenly, he appeared in front of me, his hand caught my fist in the last second before it hit his abdomen and he abruptly kissed me. I was too shocked to respond. The familiar soft, yet rough lips and that taste, spurred old feelings which I thought were long forgotten and dead. My heart throbbed. He pulled away and embraced me.

"I cannot believe that you forgot, Sara. Don't you remember your promise to me?" he whispered gently, holding back my trembling fist which was eager to hit him.

"It was seven years ago, we promised each other to wait and I promised to fetch you and I am here."

I stood there struck by disbelief and shock…What? It can't be?! It can't be him, it's impossible?!

"Seven years passed. You grown to a beautiful woman and I have aged. The years altered you so much that I barely could recognize you - you changed so much. I thought I never could find you again!" he expressed with care and desperation.

My desire to beat him melted, my fist softened and relaxed. The man opened my fist and intertwined his fingers in my own and raised them high beside us.

"I know your sufferance, I felt the same, but finally we are together again. After this long search, I found you! You don't know how much I missed you, how much I dreamed of you every single night in the past seven years! I had the single desire to be with you again and because I improved my technique I could travel through a portal to land in your world."

I heard all of this with shock and my heart swelling up.

"I was willing to give up everything to be with you again. I perfected my technique and send myself to this world, abandoning my own world for good."

The more I heard, the more aware I was that I couldn't escape this truth, this truth that was sealed in my heart which weighed so heavily in my chest.

The warmth that I believed was gone forever began to warm up my cold heart, gradually filling the hole in my heart. He pulled back to look at me in the eyes.

"My love for you never ceased, I remained the same guy that made love to you that very night." He expressed to me with sincerity and affection.

He approached my face and captured my lips gently. Then he showed his passion, by deepening the kissing and holding me ever so tightly with his hands caressing my face with care. My eyes observed his face that was absorbed with desire and affection. The memories I seem to have forgotten briskly surged in front of my eyes flashing by, revealing all his emotions, all our clumsy moments and all the profound intimacy of our relationship in that very night.

All feelings, emotions and sensations experienced on that night sent an electric wave down my body. I was reviving the memory, his face was glistering with sweat and he looked at me so intimately, like a true lover that was passionately in love. I remembered every single detail of the scene and the details of his body and how much he repeated how he loved me. He was such a beautiful sight and that memory was one of my happiest in my life.

I returned back to reality, his kissing slowed down and he pulled back with his head leaning against my forehead. Blankly I still stared at him, I couldn't believe any of this?! All the longing pulsed through my system like it never did before, the feelings intensified and the hole in my heart was nearly mended. I looked into his eyes, the longing in his was overwhelming, and he wanted me so terribly and desperately. I raised my trembling hands and cupped his cheeks. My fingers drove over his face, verifying that I wasn't dreaming anymore. The tears shot to my eyes and I croaked:

"Is it really you, Kakashi…?"

Kakashi nodded overwhelmingly, his eyes equally sparkling and I briskly closed the distance between our lips. I laced my arms around his neck and he held me so tightly. I missed him so badly for the passed seven years! I just wanted to stay forever on his side and prayed that we will never be separated again. The taste of his lips, his impatience and eagerness to please me, squeezed my heart with emotions and intense longing to close the distance between us for good.

In the beauty of the nocturnal botanical garden, we turned around in a circle under the moonlight, savouring are reunion to the fullest and expressing our affection to each other. Kakashi was even more attractive to me than he was before; I guess that was normal after such a long separation and the mental changes. His new appearance suited him perfectly.

* * *

It was like everything turned back to normal again. I received more colour and vitality from that fateful night. It changed my life so dramatically that we became a couple and no sooner a married couple. Several years later followed the first pregnancy and the first child. Nothing in the world could describe the happiness we felt. To be blessed with this being created from the seed of our love, was the most beautiful and moving moment in our lives. I had always the guarantee that Kakashi was going to be on my side till the very end and I will do the same for him.

* * *

We now sat in the garden, I held the child in my arms, cradling it to sleep and Kakashi was beside me, his hands resting on my shoulder and smiling at me affectionately. Nothing could describe the happiness that I felt to be beside this man and to hold this fragile and pure being in my arms created by our love. I could sing and shout in joy, I could dance all night long. I wish our happiness and love can surpass any obstacles and can take wings to the horizon. I wish my child to experience this love that we experienced and pray for it to grow strong and healthy. I want to pass down this message to everybody. Love gives and forgets it has given and it gives without ceasing. Live your life to the fullest, find your great love and become happy. Don't let obstacles hinder your love, be true to yourself and only give your love to the one that has perceived your true self. Believe in yourself and you'll overcome anything, that's how love works. This was my life story, a true story, beyond fiction.

**The End**


End file.
